This morning, can you hear me in the back? A little bit up. More up. More up. More up. That's it. I think it's OK. Up. Talk. OK. Today, I'm going to talk about up. Just a little up. One, two, three. It's true. I am going to talk about how to sit up straight. So today it's all about zazen. People who do Buddhist practice have various ways of sitting, meditating, and so forth, and various ways of sitting that are called Zazen.

[01:00]

Sometimes people who sit Zazen, teachers, will say, just let go. Sit down and just let go. No counting in the breath. No need to concentrate. Just let the mind go. That's one way of sitting Zazen, but that's not our way of sitting Zazen. And sometimes, even though we know how to sit those in, we get lazy. The easiest thing is to get lazy. It's just so much nicer to come in the morning and just let go. We have hard lives, you know. It's like sometimes In Sashin, people would say, I work all day. Why do I have to work during Sashin? But actually, when we said Zazen, we're working all the time.

[02:07]

Zazen is work. If you don't think it's work, then it's not Zazen. So yesterday, I was talking about Joshu's four gates. And the monk asked him, asked Joshu, well what is Joshu? Joshu said, south gate, north gate, south gate, east gate, west gate. So I'm going to talk about those four gates and Zazen. So we can talk about four gates in various ways. It's a great statement of Joshua because there's so many four gates in the Dharma. And they all have similar and different meanings.

[03:12]

The four and five is a really interesting number. We have the four elements, earth, air, fire, and water. And there's the fifth, which is emptiness or mind, pure mind. In Tozan's Five Ranks, there are the four positions and the fifth one in the middle. So this is a wonderful kind of example or diagram for how we can think about Zazen. So, in very practical terms, we are dealing with the four elements and the mind. North gate is ethereal.

[04:20]

South gate is earth. West gate is fire. East gate is water. So these are the elements that we're dealing with when we sit sadhana. How do we balance ether and earth and water and fire with the mind? With pure mind. Pure mind means the mind which is not caught by duality. That's pure mind. Tainted mind is mind which is caught by duality, which discriminates and divides. So impure mind is just as valuable as pure mind, because impure mind is simply the pure mind which is dealing with discriminations. which is not holding judgments of good and bad, right and wrong, like and dislike, pleasure and pain.

[05:36]

Good and bad. That's pure mind. So we can live in pure mind, because pure mind is the basis of everything. But a tainted mind is the mind which is creating divisions. discrimination means to divide. That's what it means. So, there's divisiveness and division. Division is important. Divisiveness is what we try to avoid. So, how do we bring together these four gross elements or five gross elements? So, we have exercise called Zazen. In Zazen we balance the earth with the ether.

[06:42]

Ether is up, earth is weight, solidity. Ether is lightness. So how do we balance heaviness with lightness, solidity with lightness? How do we balance fire with water? Fire is the impetus that makes everything work. Water is the coolant that levels everything. So the fire is like our determination. The water is like our subtleness. The pure mind is the element that harmonizes all these factors. So how to harmonize all these factors in one act?

[07:51]

That's what we're doing. And we should understand in that way, harmonizing lightness with solidity. We say to have a warm, cool head and warm feet. That's balancing ethereal with earth. Warm feet is fire, cool head, is water. So each one of these elements contains the other three or the other four. And when all of these elements are balanced perfectly, we say comfort. Dogen says zazen is the comfortable way.

[08:58]

So how do we find the comfortable way? So most important way to find the comfortable way is with our posture. Satsang is posture. Unfortunately, in our life, we've developed postures that are hard to correct. We have to make a big effort when we start to sit Zazen to find the correct posture. Posture in Zazen is not like piecemeal. It's one grand gesture. One grand sweeping gesture. So during Zazen sometimes I say, In order to have correct posture, you have to lift your sternum.

[10:04]

And I say that when I see this. And I say, in order to sit tazen correctly, you should lift your sternum. And nobody moves. I'm sorry. If you want to suffer, it's up to you. The way to release yourself and to relieve yourself from suffering is to have proper posture. Oh, my back hurts. Oh, sore. The best way to alleviate soreness is to sit up straight. When you assume your posture, this is for a healthy person. I mean, a person that actually can do this. Not everybody can, and I understand that. So we say, this is the ideal. And whatever you can do, you can do. What you can't do, I'm not being critical of that.

[11:07]

We can't all do this, but to bend forward and arch your back and then sit up straight, everything falls into place. That's one grand gesture. The head is not up. The head is on top of the shoulders, not looking up. If I say sometimes, lift up your sternum, somebody will go... That's not it. Sternum is here. When you lift up, it pushes your lower back forward. It's just one gesture. It's not fiddling with things. It's not fiddling with, you know, trying to correct little parts. It's just one gesture. And because it's one gesture, it's natural. It's just the natural ways that we've developed unnatural ways to hold ourselves.

[12:09]

And we think that's natural. Well, this is the way I do it, and this is my way of doing it. But it's not natural. You think it's natural, but it's your diversion from nature. Because nature wants us to sit up straight. Animals know how to do that, and we're animals too. So we should be able to sit up straight, just like nature intended us to do. But we have a lot of heavy weights in our life, and so we carry our postures according to the heavy weight here. Walk along like this. I do a lot of walking, and sometimes I find myself thinking, and I'm looking at the sidewalk. And then I look at the dates of when the sidewalk was made, 1907. That's interesting. But then I think, you know, that's not correct posture when I'm walking.

[13:14]

Correct posture when I'm walking is to keep my head up. But then what am I doing? I might fall into a hole, but you won't. But to keep your head up and your posture straight when you're walking is a proper way to practice. So we can be practicing this all the time. I don't say that I practice this all the time, but I practice it when I think about it. And I practice it when I sit fast, and even sometimes when I'm sleepy, I'll do this, like everybody else. But then I remind myself when I wake up to sit up straight, not just simply to stay In this position, when your back is bowed like this, that's not Zazen. I mean, for some people this is Zazen, and it's okay. But there are people who can sit up straight who don't, because we're thinking about stuff so much. The weight in our head is called thoughts.

[14:16]

Yeah, it's a weight, even though it's ethereal, it's a weight. It's true. But you can't fix it. You know, I'll put my head up. Even though I don't straighten out my back, I'll keep my head up. And so it makes our postures even more grotesque. So it's one gesture. One gesture. lower back from your coccyx to the top of your head. And you're sitting up straight. And your hands are in the mudra, lightly touching. I often see people sitting like this with the mudra like that. That's not it. The mudra, the thumbs, the tips of the thumbs are touching lightly.

[15:21]

It's almost like there's a piece of paper in between. And if you can give it that much attention, you'll stay awake. Sometimes I say to people, try to catch the moment when your mind drifts. So that's being like a cat waiting for the mouse. Except that the mouse is already gone by the time you... But that gives us some understanding of how how tricky it is, how difficult it is to stay attentive. So we keep bringing ourselves back all the time, moment after moment. There are also two sides. One is assertion and the other is relaxation. So Zazen is assertion.

[16:24]

We think of it as relaxation, but it's really assertion. To stretch our waist, when we do this, to maintain that. But we're always changing, the process is always changing, so we have to continually keep stretching. But we also have to keep relaxing at the same time, so the body is always at ease. No matter how much exertion there is, the body is always at ease. So if there's only exertion without relaxation, then we get tired out. And if there's only relaxation without exertion, we fall into a puddle. So it's the balance of all these factors, and especially exertion and relaxation. I hate to say relaxation, because you That's not what I mean by relaxation.

[17:28]

It means relaxing what's not necessary, letting go of what's not necessary. Sometimes our legs will be hurting. You may have experienced that. I know James has. So sometimes I'll say, Let go. Let go. Let go. That's a kind of mantra. Let go of what's next. Because we react to painfulness as an intrusion. If someone takes a swing at us, duck. Put up our hands or something. But here, pain introduces itself, we have to be counter-intuitive and not fight it.

[18:35]

We just let it pass through and then it's not pain. It's pain when you hold on to it. And when you hold on to it, then it becomes suffering. So how to open? Open. That's the mantra. Open. Open. Open. When you feel some so-called intrusion, open, open, and just feel yourself opening, opening, all the time. This is a continual mantra I'm introducing. Open, open, open. Sitting up straight, and open, open, open, so that you're totally open. And then there's no problem. and your joy. Why do I sit Zazen when it's just nothing but pain? That's a big question. Why am I doing this?

[19:39]

We're doing this so that we can experience how to let go and be open, totally, totally open. Usually we're not totally open because we all have defenses. our biggest problem. We need defenses, or at least we think we do. But the more open we are, the more happy we are. So how do we live in a world where we don't need to be defensive? Zazen is the one place where we don't need to be defensive. We can actually experience that. Although, you know, Sozon, the old master Sozon, was sitting Zazen and thieves came in and cut off his head. And he gave a great shout just before they did that. Hakuin said, why did he do that?

[20:44]

So if somebody comes in and chops off your head, okay. That has to be okay. But that probably won't happen. If you could chop off your own head, it would be pretty good. This is how we let go. That's why we're sitting, so we can just experience pure existence without any interference. But it's hard. It's really hard to let ourselves experience pure existence. and all these defenses that we continually are creating. And we can actually sit comfortably. It takes time before we can sit comfortably. But there are a lot of people that I know who have been sitting for 20, 30, 40 years.

[21:51]

Don't completely let go. purpose of the mind is to think. And so, of course, thoughts are continually running through our mind. It's just like leaving the tap on, letting the water run. But unfortunately we can't turn off the tap, so we just let the water run. It's a nice stream of thoughts that just go by. We don't have to get caught up in our discriminating mind, but our discriminating mind wants to get caught up in something. So, we have dreams. And we, God, this is really interesting, you know. It's okay. Follow the dream. But then, wake up.

[22:57]

Oh, this is a dream. And I realize that that's what's happening to me all the time. I'm dreaming about something all the time. And that's a wonderful revelation to realize. I'm just dreaming all the time and then letting the mind just run by like a faucet. So when we said Zazen, we can let that stream go by and observe the nice pictures and the kind of terrible thoughts that people have. People say, what about my emotions during Zazen? That's just another stream. Just a stream of feelings, a stream of emotion. It's all going by. But when you get caught by it, then that's a discriminating mind, and we stop our pure mind, kind of stop it up with kind of like weeds getting caught in the We don't try to stop thinking.

[24:13]

Thinking will always catch us, just like trying to catch the mouse. You can't catch the mouse, because the mind is built to think. So we should think in Zazen. Sometimes people say, you should not think in Zazen, so we get all caught up. Oh, I was thinking all the time in Zazen, dammit, and it was terrible Zazen. Only one minute where I didn't have a thought. That's not Zazen. The mind should be thinking. So since the mind is thinking, give it something to do. Instead of it taking over, you take over. You direct the mind. What do you do? You say, I think the thought of Zazen. All the time. So I just keep coming back. Oh yeah, this is an interesting thing. The thought of Zazen is not interesting. So that's really hard.

[25:15]

This is not an interesting thought. But if you keep doing this and keep the energy, keep the effort going, when you get off the cushion you'll have lots of energy. You'll not say, oh I'm tired, or Zazen made me tired. Zazen will not make you tired if you sit properly. Zazen will give you energy. if you sit Satsang properly. Because you're inducing energy, you're not expending it. Even though you expend energy, of course, you have to die before you live, right? If we didn't die moment by moment, we wouldn't be alive moment by moment. So, we expend energy moment by moment. But the energy is pure energy, and it induces energy. Pure energy induces energy. Light brings in light. like induces like. So we're not creating karma, we're inducing energy.

[26:20]

We're not creating some, you know, we're just living moment by moment, this moment, this moment, even though there is no now. It's all now. Moment by moment by moment, just without creating karma, without creating good and bad or right and wrong. pure existence, which is energy, the energy flows. If you sit like this all the time, if you really sit like this, even though you age you won't get old, or even though you get old you won't age, something like that. People are looking for the age genes. But it's really how you live.

[27:22]

And you know, because we all live in a defiled way, we all die. I mean, that's a discriminating thought. It's not wonderful or anything else, but we like to say that. It's just letting go. It's being present, totally present. It's called dynamic activity, total dynamic activity. It's the most total dynamic activity. In running, you wear yourself out. That's great. That's total dynamic activity. Sports are totally dynamic activities. When you're simply one with the activity. But Zazen is total dynamic activity which it doesn't start and stop. Every part of your body is involved.

[28:34]

Totally. You know, all the parts are loose and connected. It's not like this. It's not rigid posture. Upright posture doesn't mean rigid posture. It simply means relaxed posture that's natural. You're loose. All the joints are loose. They're not attached to each other. They're not tight. So I always like to use this example, if you're holding your mudra like this, your arms should be somewhat out, and if you're tense and tight, if someone pushes your elbow, the whole body goes over. But if you're loose, just the elbow moves. So what looks like rigid posture is really relaxed posture. It's the most relaxed posture.

[29:37]

If you're sitting upright with good energy and no tenseness, it's the most relaxed posture you can take. You think lying on the couch, you know, this is the relaxed posture, but it's just limpid. It's not relaxed because at some point you get tired of that. You have to move. Anyway, I just want to encourage our posture. And during Zazen, it's nice to have Zazen instruction from time to time. Sometimes I'll go around and adjust people's posture. But often, it's like statutes. Unfortunately, the older we get, the more we get fixed in our ways. It's like, don't move me.

[30:40]

Don't touch me. I don't. If that's what you want, it's fine. But it's better to be open and allow yourself to be corrected. Really good to be open and allow yourself to be corrected. But don't correct me, because I know I'm correct. So, you know, we all get stuck somewhere. It's natural, normal. It's not natural, but it's normal to get stuck in our position. So, during Sachine, when I'm sitting in Zen-do, I will keep saying, Lift your sternum. Keep your head on top of your spine.

[31:45]

If you lift your sternum, everything falls into place without you having to do anything else. Like this. Your head goes back on top of your shoulders. Your lower back is pushed forward. This is up. It's just one gesture. And then you feel exalted. If you don't feel exalted during Zazen, it's not Zazen. This is the noble posture. That's what it is. It's the noble posture. You don't feel exalted. Exalted doesn't mean arrogant. It means alive, totally alive. Totally one with the universe. If you don't feel that, it's not sansen. It is sansen, but it's not... as wonderful as you can make it. You're missing something. You're letting yourself dream.

[32:49]

So, if Shakti Muni walked into the Zen Dojo and looked at your posture, you'd be like, How would you present yourself? How would you present yourself to Vairochana? This is another set of five, with East, South, Northwest, and Vairochana in the middle. Vairochana is Buddha of Infinite Light, Radiant Light. That's what you're expressing. You are Vairagyana Siddhisatva. But if you think, I am Vairagyana Siddhisatva, that's not right.

[33:53]

But you can pick a little bit to that. Vairagyana Siddhisatva. At least, that's the model. So what do you model yourself on when you're Siddhisatva? Bam, bam, bam, bam. And people say, I don't like that. I'd rather sleep. I'd rather drift off. My daddy used to do that. And so when I hear that, it's punishment. It's not punishment. You're punishing yourself by not fulfilling yourself. So as long as you're here, you might as well fulfill yourself. This is how Dogen got awakened when Rujing went around Zendo.

[35:04]

He used to hit people with his, you know, with his slipper. Hit the monk. He said, what are you doing wasting your time on the cushion? And he hit him. Bam! You know, in a lot of the old monasteries they had clay floors. And the clay was like hard, like cement, and aging. Zindo is a clay floor, dirt floor, but it's like marble. And so they wear the slippers. They wear bare feet, but they wear slippers because it's a clay floor. He would take the slipper and hit the monks. And he hit the monk next to Dogen and said, Zazen is like, it's a vital matter. What are you doing wasting your time sleeping?

[36:05]

And hitting the monk next to the guy that gets awakened, method for telling the person next to somebody something in a Japanese style. Indirect style. Very indirect style. You want this person to know something, you hit the guy next to him. I was thinking the last time during Sishin when you carried the stick, I was thinking, I don't even miss the stick as much as the sound of someone walking around the room, which kind of is another reminder to wake up. It almost gets too quiet sometimes. It makes you be able to really daydream.

[37:08]

But if you hear the sound, I was wondering if maybe just carrying it would help. Well, you know, that's one more. As a compromise, yeah. Because I think it's helpful, actually, to hear somebody carry the stick. Well, we did say that we would carry the stick. We had this big discussion at one time and decided, yes, we could do that. But we couldn't reserve it for sashimi. And I usually carry it during the second period in the morning. But not everybody's here, but you know, there's never a time when everybody's present, though. Which is, but I want to say something about that. But just hearing somebody, just hearing the sound wakes everybody up. And surprisingly enough, when I carry this stick, almost everybody wants it.

[38:13]

And some people, especially women, like it. I know you said it feels futile to adjust people because nothing changes, but I would like if you would. I don't mind doing that. Maybe we could have a little adjust me or kick me in that post. Yes. Oh yeah, I will do that. Okay. Yes. So I just want to say that, remind us, that Kinyan is Sazen. So when we get up to question the Kinyan, it's Sazen. And that's a time when it's okay to go out and go to the john, go to the toilet.

[39:22]

Or, you know, we have various needs. Sometimes we actually need a drink of water or, you know, something. But it's not a break. So, during kin-hin, I'm thinking, do all these people have to go to the bathroom once? Maybe. But I just want to remind you, I'm not making any judgments. But I thought I'd remind us of that. Do you feel comfortable while searching? Well, it depends on what you mean by comfortable.

[40:27]

You mean when I'm sitting with eyes in, do I feel comfortable? Yes. I'm feeling comfortable whether there's any pain or not. What does that mean, pain? It has nothing to do with whether there's pain or not. So I would say I feel comfortable, yeah. See, the problem is that as soon as we say, I don't like this, we create a problem. As soon as you say, I don't want this, you create a problem. But I mean by discriminating mind. I don't like this. I don't want this. Why am I doing this?

[41:31]

One thing leads to another. So why am I doing this? I'm doing this so that I can be free of it. We can't have freedom by running away. We can only have freedom by But we think the other way. So that's why, you know, we create the problem. We create our problem. I mean, we don't do it on purpose, but that's what you learn in Zazen. That's the teaching. The teaching is that you can't escape by running away. You can only escape by being one with. So it's all about unity.

[42:34]

To be one with is unity. So pain is not suffering. Pain is just a sensation. Suffering is when you don't like it, when I don't want it, when it's wrong. That's suffering. But pain is simply a sensation. It's not a good one, and it's not a bad one. It's just this. And when you can accept that, then you can be comfortable. So I never say, I don't want this, I don't like this, I shouldn't be like this. I'm always comfortable, no matter what's happening. So I've been doing this for about 40 minutes or something.

[43:40]

Do my legs hurt? Well, I can't say they don't. And I can't say they do. There's just some tight feeling there, which is not uncomfortable. Kind of comfortable. But if I think that this is really bad, I don't want it, then I'm going to have trouble getting up. Because that makes it into something. So we turn something into something. We turn a little bit of speck of dust into a boulder. That's what we do. We have a speck of dust and it becomes a boulder. We don't have to do that. So, you know, only just one breath at a time, paying attention to one breath at a time.

[44:50]

Inhaling, we come to life, and exhaling we let go.

[44:56]

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