Striding Off The Hundred-Foot Pole

00:00
00:00
Audio loading...

Welcome! You can log in or create an account to save favorites, edit keywords, transcripts, and more.

Serial: 
BZ-02695
Notes: 

#starts-short

Auto-Generated Transcript

irwin
starts out on a journey sometimes not even consciously starting on a journey so you get these stories like the beautiful maiden playing with a lovely golden sphere in her the backyard of her castle of her home wherever she is and the ball rolls away
goes down the hill and she chases after that winds up in a forest of confusion and she cannot find her way back home
so she's been sorted are thrust into the journey some people more consciously set out on a journey to find
ha noi the knights in the middle ages we're looking for the holy grail
psyche was looking for her her true love to see in the light
people search for
their purpose of their life there's sold partner there for god buddha went on a search for the end of suffering possible causes and and of suffering as we can say as a grail
and as we know from bruges saif and from our own in doing in interest being involved in practice deeply that there are on this journey many many false trails little
byways that take it down not quite a useful direction allergy of growth many hindrances there can be people along the way that are hindrances or challenges or trials ah probably the most famous of the to
trials would be hercules doing things like cleaning the a g and staples i mean trials and dot com era
so
that's when scientists the equation of the first half of the attorney the others component of that is all the helpers sitter that are present along the way so depending on the myth you're reading the story you're reading it can be birds dropping crumbs or
i'm a little or elderly man or woman who sell sample is pointed this way or any other things so so we don't
sometimes when we speak especially if the hero's journey we tend to speak of it is
i did it my way search for frank sinatra furnishings
getting to the time for more feminine version already challenges no way that's happening there's simply no way that will do anything without the support hadn't help us at a recently crashed so
okay so that's the outline had that joseph campo presents to us
joseph says that eco shows enlightenment is not yet the real thing
so
my understanding of his meaning is the yoshio is clinging to is attached to his enlightenment which is the pitfall of any practice and a
in our language we sometimes called this distinct of a sin so the gold of the
experience turned to ash because it's being clutched it's being held and isn't allowed motion and air and the great temptation and it's probably close to universal i think is is to hold on his to is so heavenly to come in
to this place that want to to stay there when an abreast
shakyamuni buddha stated that the bodhi tree a while himself a minute suite is something that happens we do this
however
it can cause problems so william blake for you probably know this a very short pump for lines any kind of says the whole thing
he who does bind to himself with joy
got the wing your life destroy
he who kisses the joy as it flies the sydney eternity sunrise
yes he who does bind to himself with joy
does the wing life destroy
he who kisses the joy as it flies
lives in eternity sunrise
yeah you could hang out with that a while it's still quite lovely a it
so finding this holy grail finding enlightenment is not the end of the journey so the return to the everyday world and finding ways to share the grail is the true return of the heroin and then
the journey how to even describe this this sort of ineffable
wordless experience how to how does translated how to say it how to speak of the possible end of suffering for people who may very well be starved for the dharma we say
but don't have a clue about how harder begin a path how do we how do we speak to this is a courtroom joseph cambell that i have loved a long time he says he's a translate this problem how to render into light world language
the speech define pronouncements of the dark
isn't that lovely how to render into light world language the speech to find pronouncements of the dark
in ten were a little more succinctly sometimes speak about the finger pointing to the moon which is not the moon
the finger pointing to them sir joseph towne a churches challenge etiquette when chaussures challenge to us is how do we live this enlightenment
how do we embody it how do we manifest it
how do we speak of the speech defying wisdom of the end of suffering
even as our vow is to serve all sentient beings when i started at the since and are now a our chant used to be sentient beings are numberless we vowed to save them or how me to say serve
anyway but plenty good the monk asks for all of us how do you advance to step
i'm i'm would say that the another way to say it would be how do we trust the paradox that to drop any clinging to spiritual gain
is to manifest it

so in the ox hurting pictures which are a series of ten pictures describing an ox herder who is in search of the grail of enlightenment and in the could be a her dress if there's such a thing and knocks her dress and
renovate the ox herder in the ninth picture of ten is is self disappears he he's enlightened
and in the tenth picture he's depicted as returning to the marketplace
i love this phrase with bliss bestowing hands
hey lovely putting his wisdom
at the service of all sentient beings
for me it's important that he or she is often depicted as covered with dust and sweat
in very mundane basic clothing
a living in a humble fashion and sharing the joys and sorrows of piss the world he's inhabiting
but from every
other place we can say
so she could be described as a sacred fool who this guy stepped off the pole or a bodhisattva putting her wisdom at the service of all sentient beings and bestowing bliss in her everyday life so i think
she's asking he she is asking always are
what's needed now what's here now
what does this moment call forth
and then she responds
so for me this is the step off the poor this is the jump in the in a coin the stride off the hundred foot pole
stepping forth with the great stride into the moment and what it presents fully wholeheartedly nin then body mind
right now
so as i reflect on this cohen in relation to my life now and my practice i love this corner have the feeling i could study this went till the end of my life and depending on how things go into the next one
am
i find it to it's is is also a beautiful translation if this time i wanna read the appreciate tray first
it
so for me ah
as some if you know i moved here it's really hard for me to believe it's for years ago
now and i've made several moves big moves before in my life but they were always a fibrous always considerably younger and working full time which makes a big difference this move came at a time in my life when i had just moved out of the center for sanchez
plus a after living there for eleven years and being a student there for sixteen
my paid work as a therapist had been come to a close and the work i had been doing as chaplain also came to a close
and i stopped or fifteen years didn't i worked as a buddhist chaplain in the l a jails for fifteen years and that came to our clubs size in all kinds of transactions at when time and my daughter and my daughter law as i was moaning all this
over sidwell to add to my considerations why did you move up here we'd love to have you nearby which is a lovely offered to get from near family
and we're considering creating our own family were can have children and you can be a on grandmother
don't have to hear that on twice
so but i came up here and i didn't know anybody actually did not know besides my daughter and donor night didn't know one person here
and so
i tend to be pretty good it
i'm finding my way in new situations because i i've learned to follow my own passion were really the things that draw me knowing that i will find like minded people so first i searched for a zen center i visited every cent center in this air
the of just me is a cloud of visiting and
in l a they say you trip over leaders in actors and in berkeley you trip over his and students said centers eight at any rate so i found this sand center and i found three posts i write poetry so i found three poetry groups and empire
of
i was told by somebody who knew i had been a chaplain about the threshold choir which things for people at the beginning of life are some mc end of life at the beginning of five and i also at the end of life so i joined that choir which i have loved very much
much and i've made friends and i found my way here and i'm happy to be here i'm happy to say now i'm happy to be her took a while tip for me to earn that i missed their way hugely still do
not the same way though and so i feel like a well met here and i'm happy about that that said life changes and situations change so now like it's interesting when i go back to allay what i call my away my people my ocean
my zen center my away to of my best friends have died in the last year and a third has moved with her husband who has dementia back east to family so
that's a lot of my a not percent
i was recent i i stay connected very connected with this and center and a month still serve and some things committees programs there but
the last time i was down was for the dissenting of the abbot seat by roshi a milking a cow
and a the ascending of the damacy by a avid seat by a dharma sister of mine we came to the sand center in the same month in two thousand so a very momentous important occasion and where i still living the i would have been in the milk mixed of all the
drew when what was happening but and i helped in the kitchen i did what i saw need helping with but is pretty clear i was a guest a very beloved guess i feel very cherished there and i cherish many people there and that was a guest and and not that's not
so to speak now has very different
so am i
let's see what else is a change tear
and
is that really represents a change in of letting go then it turns out that my daughter and daughter-in-law i've decided not to have children so that i'm not going to be a grandmother if anybody has grandchildren to rent a
and i am your purse i'm on call twenty four seven
so i saw the experiences of a not roll not rolled having it being an r o l e d
i am still i'm still a mother but i'm a mother of the have a wonderful off adult daughter and the relationship is one of deep play and connection and a friendship and love and refund gonna do a mother daughter works
shop together she's also a clinician so it's pretty exciting for me and i
a delight that am this kind of connection as possible of us great joy of my life
i'm not a chaplain now i'm not a therapist now
i'm not married at this time nor partnered
i have some non-life-threatening but chronic
physical conditions that i have to work with on a daily basis that are
tell ching i can say
i love to take naps have just discovered apps i take them maybe once a to weekend office the best game in town know why i don't do it more
i look in the mirror and this is funny things from many people in my cohort describe is this sensation and that kinda in it's not a judging look in the mirror it's the look of was not like oh my god there's another wrinkle kind of look it's a kind of seeing what's in the mirror and then
the discrepancy between what i see and the fact that i inside myself i feel without age virtually ageless so as very interesting
it would have played between that that i find very fascinating am
see what else time i must say here
so i had an accident last december and a in december and for the first few weeks i really needed to wasn't free mobile at literally at all and so i had the library quietly and in a kind of
liminal state and i it was an extraordinary and precious time for me it was like a time out of mind and a m
this is one those places it's hard to talk about an indwelling quiet it was very special to me i wasn't doing place at all it was just a being present place just a quiet loving silence and quiet place
so age and ageing is still kind of uncharted territory
we have led to books on retirement planning and writing your advance directive and how to
live out your gears with good health and eating right and or kinds of suggested directives which despite that no no problem with that how to handle your finances have a plan how to
age in place etc but health and detriments or
no
we have them and their the the pattern of our lives is very different than all the other stages which are fairly well graft you can say there's a lot written about them we kinda know what happens in which is theoretically what happens author of there are variations on the theme
but we really don't know this is uncharted people are living years and years older in health in good health and then in not good health
which is the hope that the whole changing demographic in itself i went on a windjammer cruise about her how long ago now maybe thirty years ago and i have claustrophobia so i had to sleep on the deck at night but everybody else was sleeping below decks in where the
where the sailors used to sleep those bunks were made for people who were five foot five
that's a change in demographics among other things so
i think the challenge of my life in this time at this age at this stage is to keep just stepping off the pole in not knowing there's so much i don't know so much as not charged for me it's not set up in any room
of whatsoever and it just keep asking like the ox herder what's needed now
what's this moment calling forth without any title or job description
at the moment i'm writing my memoirs as the request of my daughter and it's turning out to be absolutely delicious to do i'm remembering all these people from my life all these helpers these wonderful
teachers and
mrs smith from down the street and feeling into how they impacted me how these threads in the fabric of my life connect and i love doing this i've loved the quiet times a frightening i love with when i'm writing poetry and i'm particularly falling in love with singing
at better i haven't really sung since the end of highschool i sang in a course in high school and then for some reason i it i dropped off for me except in the shower or with friends yodeling away in a car or something but i've kind of rediscovered my voice
that is not to say i'm gonna be
doing anything solo with it but i love being a member of the course had loved to sing i'm learning to harmonize which i'd never knew how to do before and that's great joy to find his way of blending voices is just
a quite extraordinary and because i do think music brackets or life at beginning and end it took way in deeply in the beginning and end of life it's very dear to be with people who are dying babies or
ah elderly people and anywhere in between who are dying and i know that even when they're in coma that they hear and i absolutely trust this and i'm learning songs because of lot of the covert reducing for people in their mid dish go
winning to middle ages so i'm learning songs that i can remember my dad humming
but never learned like
a they'll be blue birds over is why cliffs of to for it's lovely the little the this very sweet songs that the time before a to and other songs
and people respond you can see the responses the changes in breathing
the body eating
everyone's noel i have moments of fear a kind of inner tightening from wanting to fill in the space with doing something
and i understand where that that that but with our culture we are a doing culture and a being is another thing when i can let myself sit down in the fear of
wanting to have something to hold onto
then that's what practice helps with so deeply is that the fear moves about when it's brought to light
most training to be a chaplain i was my assigned to the nikki of them in neonatal intensive care unit where some babies are miraculously saved with modern medicine and some babies die and i was a chaplain with the family whose baby was in the
dying and i remember i can can remember it so actively and my body i i was standing a silk god i want to do something on netflix it was so desperate and need to fix or did you something
and my supervisor happened to be walking to the war that he knew me very well he saw what i was he saw my face is on my body construction his huge tall man and he came over and he said and a free crack for do nothing just
do nothing
still still rises up so i think i'm gonna stop and open this up i had more to say but maybe maybe it's not necessary let me just end with this because i love it it's not quite in the context as you wanna say two things
when is about gloria steinem
who if you have not heard her speaking about gun control and paralleling it with the portion
look for it
to get watches than at any rate at famously at age fifty when somebody said well while you look fabulous for your age
and she said this is what fifty looks like
and then i hope he said it again at sixty seventy and eighty she's now eighty five and she's gorgeous and i hope she says it at a hundred may be so
ah so i'm gonna
step off my the poll for the last time here
i am
well i broke down but but that what i want to do is keep stepping off the pole to keep opening to keeping my heart open to be
cheering whatever it is i have to share every once in awhile i missed the roles of the places where i could actually put my skills and my life experience and sometimes that may happen and it may not but wherever it may happen
so here is ts eliot last the four quartets little getting many of you will know this quote i sort of messed around with the a little bit so don't be disturbed
we shall not cease from exploration
and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and to know the place for the first time
through the unknown remembered gate when the last of earth left to discover is that which was the beginning
a condition of complete simplicity
costing not less than everything
and all shall be well and all manner of thing shall be well
thank you
oh have thought the question jim does that tell me when the timer
fuck
ten after

i practice
iraq
you
no understand
sure yeah
yes
yeah
yeah master tosha as a monk to go ask the hermit yoshio what about before you saw nonsense
the monk did so and yoshio was silent for a while the monk asked how about after seeing him then what yoshio said nothing special the monk returned and told this to joseph and joshi said there's the man and the top of one hundred foot pole
oil though he has a degree of understanding it's not yet the real thing
from officer
from the top of the hundred foot pole he should advance a step and the ten directions of the world will be his entire body the monk asked how do you advance a step and chose your replied the mountains of rural province the waters of re proud
vince the monk said i don't understand and chose remarked the for oceans and the five lakes are within the king's control
so the king is a skies
the queen queen and king as guys now
and i'm in the appreciate to reverse at the end it's if i don't read the whole thing but it says wordless peach and plum
under them people's footpaths naturally form when the season comes work to tell the soil who's afraid in spring paddies to sink in mud to the knees beautifies a beautiful car yeah
hi peter

same person
yeah wonderful
yeah
f thank you
preparation researcher

the fifty day
that's that first staff and the dirty for it i
took to the kush is one piece
is it
by taxi isn't know
a practice practice practice ah ok i did the other and to okay fact is fact yeah a price specs expects works for me but and practice practice practice it just using that template of the hero's journey heroine's journey is the
that there really are challenges along the way it's not just that you to sit in and you're sitting you sit to more and then you get your your
the price cracker box or something it's it's no question hard work hard hard hard work and then we always used his metaphor of the pit them you know the pebble hitting the pale assertively talking about an actor whose an overnight success after work
king for twenty five years every day you know
i don't
did you read someone recognize yourself on the hundred for all in the do at some point recognize yourself have to step off and how was that
i can't i i kind of think of this poll as not a one shot paul i mean i think we have funded football's we have challenge
we set challenges to ourselves in different ways at different times so it
this could be something that happened in a day
i think so yeah trying to think of one if one rises up like that
moving up here was a biggie hungry really
is there was a huge step off from me yeah
i did trust the practice out there is that was nothing about that there was a question for me but it was it felt like the virtually stepping into his face lot scary was actually scary i didn't say that to myself at the time
i said it after i got here after i got here
please
yes
yeah
your
you
yes own a certain a so much nicer ways
yeah
thank you
bro city
two
we read or is like the tickets this year the the image in the tarot cards of the the sacred fool that first card where he's just sort of going
like this out into space as a dank the huge trust actually the to let go to not hot gas for the big trust that what is needed will be present will come
please
oh thank you well we're doing a workshop a one day workshop for mothers an adult daughters because we think it sir
the tree and sometimes for many people to very challenging terrain to be in
on both sides effect in collaboration silver can do have one day workshop and then we'll see where it goes from there yeah so
and if you have to come as a pair yeah we you'd be a days how often that customer deserves
which is which is the problem
ah oh yeah well who knows maybe we'll do something else have pointed kick
thank you
yes

oh

we we will be available post facto
that is a workshop is one day life goes on practice goes on availability goes on the care
excuse me
who's asking that where are you there
oh well i would have to consult with my work partner
let us try different first for africa yes please

that

it depends what the hell was he came off of and how you came off it ammonite that's a piece of this but let's just see how does a homeless person in or an older person and the condition of poverty
he
move move forward i mean
yeah
it's not okay with me that anybody's in their condition that's not okay but but at the end
we can't fix all that but we can we can and do i hopefully respond where we see the need whether somebody's been pushed off the pole stepped off the pole or anyway they're they're in
painful streets that we have that we respond so well as we each can in the situation i don't think i don't know how to talk about that from the trust place of how they got off the pole that but but i that would be my response off the pole toward that
person hopefully hopefully

please

yeah

i would appreciate the point to i wanted the practices that i have done just in terms of i work with the you know the five remembrances if we're all of a nature to grow old sick die et cetera
i used to do i don't actually do it so much any worms time
it is that
place to do a meditation where i imagined myself
homeless
and yeah out of contact with other people under a bridge
incapacitated and not able to to ask for help and then
sat down inside of that experience but it to try to to be with it would to start the same thing as were i in fact homeless but it does allow for the non beautiful picture of
a person with privilege and money being able to get old i just went to her a new senior housing thing to visit were only costs eleven thousand dollars a month
to be there and the uk is is perfect you can die their peace they don't use the d word but when could get there
a fancy so that's the other end of the protective gear pleasure

letting go
answer
who had nothing
how will brilliant time you have to tell me where out of fun and tried can we talk after
thank you okay