For two months, fortunately or unfortunately, I have, I will have to, I will have a chance to give, to give a lecture every Tuesday night. But, to tell the truth, I don't know really what to do for training period, because it is first experience for me, such a training period, to have such a training period.

[01:00]

But anyway, sometimes I think which is student, which is teacher, you know. I am teacher or I am student. But anyway, during this training period, I would like to practice with you as a student. Sometimes teacher, sometimes student. For a long, long time, I have been thinking what kind of lecture I should have. For a long time, I have concentrated on. But at last, I found some book, but unfortunately that book is really not, really not familiar

[02:10]

with you, because you cannot find this book in English. But, in contrast with this book, there is very famous book, so-called Brookleaf Record. It is very known so well by Western people. The content of this book is pretty similar with this Brookleaf Record, but unfortunately it hasn't yet been translated by anybody. But I don't want, I don't think I am going to translate this book, but anyway, I would

[03:16]

like to explain. Translation is not so good, so anyway, behind translation, I would like to explain what it is. This book consists of 100 koans, 100 koans with appraisals. It's with appraisals given by Wanshi Zen Master. You know, the Brookleaf Record consists of also 100 koans with appraisals given by Engo

[04:24]

Zen Master. And also, no, the Secho Zen Master, who flourished from the end of the 10th century to the beginning of the 11th century in China. And also, Engo Zen Master, who lived from the 11th century to the 12th century or so, added PC remarks and critical commentary in every koan.

[05:32]

This Brookleaf Record was published about 1125 years, in 1125 or so. But the book I am going to deal with was published in about 1235 years in China. So, I think it was published 98 years later, from the publication of the Brookleaf Record.

[06:38]

Anyway, Wanshi Zen Master collected 100 koans and appraised them. Gyoshu Zen Master, who lived in the 13th century or so, added PC remarks and critical commentary to 100 koans collected by Wanshi Zen Master. That book was generally called Shouyou Roku, in contrast with the Brookleaf Record.

[07:50]

Shouyou Roku. Shouyou means imperturbability. So, literally meaning imperturbability record. Brookleaf Record. Hekigan Roku in Japanese. Hekigan is blue. Heki is blue. And gan is cliff. Roku is record. Then, Brookleaf Record we call it. The Gyoshu Zen Master added the PC remarks and critical commentary to the 100 koans collected by Wanshi Zen Master at his room, which is called Shouyou An. An means the room. So, Shouyou imperturbability room.

[08:54]

That's why this book is called imperturbability record. Originally, this book consists of 100 koans collected by Wanshi Zen Master, and adding the appraisals, gathas. That is original book. Before Gyoshu Zen Master added PC remarks and critical commentary. Originally, the text is called Wanshi Juko Hyakusoku.

[10:05]

Means the 100 koans collected by Wanshi Zen Master with his appraisal. Original text was not called Shouyou Roku. The name of Shouyou Roku was given later. After Gyoshu Zen Master added PC remarks and critical commentary to this book. Then, the book I am going to use is not Shouyou Roku. Original text. The 100 koans collected by Wanshi Zen Master with his appraisal. Anyway, I am going to deal with those koans one by one.

[11:17]

The model case number one. Title is Shakyamuni Buddha on the pulpit. Shakyamuni Buddha on the pulpit. Attention. One day, Shakyamuni Buddha sat on the pulpit to teach. Manjushri Bodhisattva struck a wooden block with a mallet and said, Complete comprehension. Dhamma, kings, dhamma. Dhamma, kings, dhamma. Just this. Shakyamuni Buddha got down from the pulpit without saying anything at all.

[12:33]

That's all. His koan. One day, Shakyamuni Buddha sat on the pulpit to teach. Manjushri Bodhisattva struck a wooden block with a mallet and said, Complete comprehension. Dhamma, kings, dhamma. Dhamma, kings, dhamma. Just this. Shakyamuni Buddha got down from the pulpit without saying at all. Without teaching at all, anyway. That whole story. Very simple. Appraisal. I wonder. If you see this very admirable scenery,

[13:37]

the loom of truth is uninterruptedly weaving. A woven brocade is vivified like spring. There is no help for the deity of spring to leak out. I wonder if you see this very admirable scenery, the loom of truth is uninterruptedly weaving. A woven brocade is vivified like spring. There is no help for the deity of spring to leak out. Let's imagine. Imagine the scene when Shakyamuni Buddha is about to teach on his pulpit.

[14:47]

Like me to do like this. Tonight chanting sutra and sit here. The moment when Shakyamuni Buddha sat on the pulpit, Manjushri appeared and said, Complete comprehension, dhamma, kings, dhamma. Dhamma, kings means Buddha himself. Buddha himself. And dhamma, kings, dhamma. This dhamma is Buddha's teaching. What is speaking by Shakyamuni Buddha?

[15:50]

What is mentioned by Shakyamuni Buddha? So dhamma, kings, dhamma means Buddha's teaching. In other words, simply speaking, your teaching. Your teaching, what you are going to teach. Then Manjushri says, your teaching. Your teaching. Hitting the wooden block, which is called, it is pronounced, twitching in Japanese. Twitching. When Bhikkhu Roshi had his Shinsen ceremony here, I said the same things. What Manjushri said, I substituted Manjushri's Bodhisattva

[16:59]

and said, hitting the twitching, complete comprehension. Dhamma, kings, dhamma, your teachings. Dhamma, kings, dhamma, your teaching, just this. Just this means, like this. In other words, that's it. It's not necessary to explain anything at all. That's it. And then Shakyamuni Buddha got down from the pulpit without teaching anything at all. That's the whole story. Well, let's look at your practice.

[18:02]

Look at your practice. Or, let's imagine my teaching. When I come here, I sit. And then someone comes, Manjushri Bodhisattva comes here. Dhamma, kings, dhamma, dhamma, kings, dhamma, just this. And I'm going to go down from the platform without saying, oh, what do you think about? Sometimes, well, what's the matter, Katagi? You forget the subject, but you are going. You forget. I'm sorry for Katagi. Then the moment when you think so,

[19:06]

I'm very reluctant to go away, you know. I must say something. Even just a little bit. Even just a little bit. I have to say something. This means, in my mind, in the center of my self-consciousness, okay, there are lots of holes through which very cold wind goes through. It is called delusions. It is called delusions. Then I am wondering, what shall I do? The same applies to your practice, to our practice, you know.

[20:14]

I mention always, in the first session, it's pretty good. The second session is very good for you. The third session is a little bit hard, you know. The fourth session, completely, you are wandering in the world of the session. It's pretty hard to concentrate on session. The fourth session, it's pretty hard to concentrate on following the schedule of session. Completely, your mind is wandering here and there. Even to sit, at that time when you sit, it's pretty hard for you to concentrate, to keep your mind, to take care of your mind.

[21:22]

It's pretty hard. Because the more you try to control your mind, the more your mind is far out. It's very hard. Then at that time, in the third session, in the fourth session, you have some doubt, what is that thing? The question, what is that thing? The moment you say, what? The moment you say, what? The question, what means, implies, to make some hole, to create some hole through which a cold, very cold wind goes through. It's very hard. Then your life, your zazen is completely unstable.

[22:31]

You cannot trust on zazen. I think the more you practice zazen, six times, seven times, hundred times you try to attend the session, you realize, you will realize that there are very difficulties which enable you to be unstable in the practice of zazen. It's very hard. Then at that time, you try to tune in. You try to tune your mind, your zazen, tune in with the true meaning of zazen. What zazen is? The true meaning of zazen means Buddhist zazen. You try to tune in. You try to set the dial of the radio.

[23:34]

You try to set, but you can't. You can't set the dial. The moment when you think, I got it. Something disturbs. So-called lightning thunder. It's pretty hard. On the other hand, you think zazen is zazen which means true zazen, which means Buddhist zazen, which means absolute zazen. Absolute zazen. In other words, the absolute. Zazen is the absolute. You try to tune in with the absolute,

[24:34]

absolute zazen, into your daily life, but it goes from your zazen. At that time, you think zazen is really nonsense, useless. Then uselessness enables your life to be unstable. What is the absolute? What is zazen? What is Buddhist zazen? Most people give up the practice in that way, but you push yourself a little more. You have to break this wall. Everybody goes through this wall. You can't get rid of it. The more you practice, the more you realize that difficulty,

[25:36]

which is very clear. Very clear. But through and through, you have to know. You have to know that true zazen is completely nonsense. Completely nonsense. Not halfway through. Completely, completely, absolutely. You know, Shakyamuni Buddha teaches us egolessness. I think Mr. Jack Weller gave a lecture, he gave a lecture for two months on the subject of egolessness. What is egolessness? There doesn't exist, there doesn't exist something special so-called egolessness

[26:37]

after practicing, after practicing zazen, after practicing Buddhism. I don't think so. The more you practice zazen, the more you realize that there exists just ego. Just ego. Then at that time you think, wow, practice is really nonsense. But on the other hand, you have very good sharp mind and very good conscience. Very good nature of conscience. Conscience. That's why you try to, again and again, tune in with what egolessness. But you cannot find egolessness. What you have,

[27:42]

all you have to do to realize is, to do is to realize that there is just ego. Just ego. At that time, you realize how huge ego is. How huge. You cannot find you can't take care of that huge ego. Huge. You can't imagine. Buddhism sometimes says 108 delusions. I don't think so. More than 108. More than 108. Huge. Huge delusions. But majority of people are cannot stand, cannot stand in this, in the world of the ego,

[28:43]

how huge it is. Because there are lots of choice, you know, which leave you in bewilderment. Why don't you do that? You know? Even Zen Buddhism in the United States, Rinzai Zen, Soro Zen, you practice, you think of which is good. You think which is good. Soro Zen? Karagi says, always dogens, you know. What is dogen? Dogen saying is real Buddhism? Sometimes Karagi says, no, dogen is really crazy, something crazy, man. If so, the Rinzai is good. Always thinking, there are many choice.

[29:45]

So, Shakyamuni Buddha teaches us we need practice so-called egolessness. Egolessness means that through whole your life, not only whole your life, life after life, I always say, life after life, your whole life is very short period of time, you know. Even though you try to strive for living long, you know, 50 years or 60 years, or 70 years. Maximum maybe 100. I'm sorry for you. Everybody, you have to die. 50 and 60. So, for through whole your life, the whole your life is very short period of time. So, I said,

[30:53]

I mention always life after life, life after life. Life after life, you have to practice the egolessness. Egolessness means you have to practice ego. You have to practice ego. Don't give up. Don't give up. So, when you, I became a priest at 18 years old, but to tell the truth, I didn't really understand

[31:53]

what Zazen was. While I was in Japan, I didn't know and I didn't understand. Then I came to United States. In two years, I concentrated on what Zazen is because I have to talk something. About Zazen, it's pretty hard. I didn't understand, but I have to talk. Sometimes, sometimes, I have some doubt why I have to give lectures because I didn't understand what Zazen was, clearly. I didn't attain enlightenment. I didn't. But I have to. Wow, it was really hard, very hard. Every, in every lecture, I got a

[32:55]

very cold sweat. And the, here, very cold sweat. Nobody knows. Nobody knows. I alone know so well how hard. But the more, the more I tried to concentrate on what Zazen was, the more, all I had to do was to realize the big egos, big, huge egos, which left me completely in confusion, in confusion. So, at Sokoji, I sat Zazen, facing the Kannonborisatva. Kannonborisatva.

[33:56]

On the wall. Sometimes I said, please, Kannonborisatva, tell me something. But he didn't. Let's imagine, you know, all I had to, to do was to realize the big egos, which left me completely confused in the confusions. What it means that I couldn't find nothing, I couldn't find anything at all in the world of Zazen, the world of Zazen. In the world of my Zazen office, something happens. Very, very busy. But, nevertheless,

[34:57]

on the other hand, I try to tune in, you know, with real Zazen, what real Zazen, what real Zazen. Concentrating on breathing and throwing away the ideas and thoughts. But the idea I am, I have to throw away my idea is already my idea. So, of course, this idea left me completely in the confusions. Like you, you know, everybody experienced the same way, I think so. Then I felt, Zazen was really nonsense. Then I thought, I would like to converge, converse, convert into the sim priest. Sim priest is crazy. No one loves, no one loves. Always chanting,

[35:58]

no one loves. Please. Please help me. Please help me. No one loves, no one. That's the name of Amitabha. Then facing Kannon Bodhisattva, I was chanting Amitabha's name and Amitabha's. But it also doesn't make sense. Same things, same things. I don't know how long I did in that way, at that time I felt suddenly, wow, really nonsense. I really felt, I realized, ah, this is really nonsense. Then at that time all ideas, lots of, lots of ideas,

[37:00]

huge piles of ideas completely fell down from the top of the mountains to the foot of the mountain like this. At that time I felt, I experienced, suddenly, ah, this is nonsense. This is really nonsense. And then I felt, wow, thank you. Thank you, Boris Sartorius. Nonsense-ness, nonsense-ness, make my mind completely clean, wash away. And then I felt very refreshed and then

[38:01]

sit very relaxed, very relaxed. And then my zazen is a little bit wonderful. A little bit wonderful. It's now complete, you know. You know, the egoless-ness, something like this. Through and through you have to realize how huge ego is and also how what profits what profits ego. How how nonsense how nonsense the ego is. Through and through. Then all

[39:03]

lots of huge pile of ideas in egoless-ness, egoless-ness. I want to get the egoless-ness. Buddha nature and so on is suddenly fell down. Collapsed. At that time it is called egoless-ness. So it doesn't there doesn't exist something special so-called egoless-ness. What exists is ego, what you have, okay, what you have. I'm sorry for you. Then life after life you try to take care of this ego, okay, huge ego. Then when your pile of

[40:05]

ideas called egoless-ness or ego and so on how nonsense the ego is is suddenly collapsed. At that time you find this core, the core of existence of your own. What opens up, what opens up huge horizons of beings called Buddha-world. Buddha-world. At that time your existence is very stable, very stable. At that time your life is very stable. In appearance your life follows the same way

[41:06]

as others do. Nothing special, nothing different. But behind, behind your life there is something exist, which exist so-called imperturbability, imperturbability or stableness. So, I think Shakyamuni Buddha of course attained enlightenment. See through and through the

[42:06]

deep-down nature of being what it is like. So, I think his life is based on complete imperturbability. Whatever he does, wherever he may be, that's why Manjushri Bodhisattva Manjushri Bodhisattva symbolized wisdom. If you find the deep nature, deep-down nature of being through self-consciousness, through self-consciousness, in other words, through your body and mind. It is called even a little bit,

[43:06]

even a little bit, it is called wisdom. It is called wisdom. If you have wisdom, you can see into the depth of being. Depth of being. Based on imperturbability, stableness. Then, Manjushri Bodhisattva appears and said, your teachings, your teachings just this. That's it. You are great. It is not necessary to talk anything special. Then, Shakyamuni Buddha realized Manjushri, Shakyamuni Buddha

[44:07]

can read Manjushri Bodhisattva's mind. Then, he immediately goes down from the platform without teaching anything. Our practice must be so. When you sit, wherever you are, don't think, don't think, no, I am not Buddha. I am not complete. Don't think so. The moment what you think, I am not complete, I am not Buddha, immediately disturbs your life. Don't think that. Wherever you are, beginners or advanced students, I don't know what advanced students of Zen. Anyway,

[45:09]

all of you are very advanced students in comparison with my practice. I always think I am very big what you call liar what you call you are liar [...] I think always I am big liar terrible liar in comparison

[46:10]

with my practice all of you are your practice is very advanced you are Buddha I always think all of you are Bodhisattvas Buddhas because you can stand before me to listen to the Buddha's teaching delivered by me I always think wow thank you very much because Bodhisattvas exist here that's why I can I can become Bodhisattva immediate right now how wonderful immediate simultaneous I don't know what you what goes first you your Bodhisattva or my Bodhisattva I don't know what which of which of two goes first student

[47:12]

or teacher I don't think so simultaneously I felt always simultaneously you are Buddha thank you this is really true so don't think I am not the Buddha the moment when you think I am not Buddha that is the psychological psychological antenna ok that psychological antenna is two ends with different directions you can't two ends wherever you are that's alright when you sit Zazen try to sit Zazen when you do Kassho do Kassho always say that you know but you don't understand but this is very important ok except this

[48:13]

except now how can you explain my life ok after finishing lecture Katagiri is Katagiri during giving a lecture Katagiri is Katagiri who is giving a lecture that's all ok so whatever you think whatever I think I have to give a lecture becoming Buddha ok becoming Buddha it's not it's not big mouth ok not big mouth it is it is great ok it is great because I am Buddha in the world of saying I am Buddha this attitude includes

[49:14]

imperturbability also very serious and straightforward reflection reflection upon one's life one's life very humble reflections so I am Buddha it's not big mouth you do Kassho this Kassho it is not ego ok when you do Kassho please do Kassho when you do Sassen please do Sassen ok at that time you become Buddha ok become Buddha that practice very important ok that's why

[50:23]

one Shizen master says I wonder if you see this very admirable scenery ok most of you have to see this point all of you are Buddha ok all of you are Buddha you know you can if you cannot see all of you are Buddha you can't stop fighting with each other ok through and through through and through the moment when you see someone ok whoever he is you are Buddha ok in Lotus Sutra Jogo Bodhisattva always do Kassho to everybody whom by whom this Bodhisattva

[51:29]

was completely hurt hurted disturbed but he always do Kassho through and through that practice is very important you can't see the Buddha you can't see the Buddha all you can see is to realize ego ego big ego the big ego is ok don't see the ego big ego through the small extension extension extension of extension of the world

[52:29]

so called telescope you have ok through and through you have to see the Buddha ok you have to see the Buddha whatever you do you are Buddha that time you can bow to everybody that practice is very important for our our days ok in our day for us in our day Japanese whoever you are Japanese or Americans or everybody ok I wonder if you see this very admirable scenery ok when you do Zazen you have to see the Buddha ok the room of truth is uninterruptedly weaving

[53:30]

ok that practice is continually weaving ok weaving the Buddha's word the Buddha's life ok weaving Buddha's life life then at last you create very wonderful gold brocade ok that brocade completely collapse your idea so called eagerness or ego ok the woven brocade is vivified ok that woven brocade which collapse your ego your ideas which collapse your ideas ok that

[54:30]

woven brocade is vivified like spring ok like spring eagerness is not there a certain conception ok so called abstract the the absolute and so on abstract conception is not abstract conceptions it is like a spring ok it is always vivified there is no help for the deity of spring to leak out ok in a spring even though you don't like a spring when the spring comes everything is closed ok everything is closed you can't stop you can't stop that is Buddha's word ok then the Manjushri Bodhisattva in the first

[55:31]

statement complete comprehension that is complete comprehension look at this look at this point ah the word is exist what do you mean by exist ok exist think in many ways the exist is to be expressed by lots of words the absolute the absolute reality or the absolute absolute nothingness, or the big self itself.

[56:37]

Sometimes the big being in conformity with self. Sometimes the big being actually distinguished from self and so on. But they all unnecessarily related to the character of the self consciousness while founded on the absolute, okay, the absolute itself. Speaking in the Buddhistic term, the form of self consciousness is named worldly truth and the absolute truth, okay, absolute truth.

[57:41]

The absolute truth can be only realized by and in the worldly truth, okay. When the worldly truth is related to and touches the absolute, the worldly truth is divided into the expressed form and the other one is the expressing subject, expressing subject. The expressed form is the absolute, the absolute. In other words, your zazen, your gassho, something like this. The expressing subject is the center of the self consciousness, okay, self consciousness.

[58:46]

Now when the worldly truth is related to the absolute, okay, the worldly truth is divided into two, okay. One is expressed form, the other one is expressing subject. The expressed form is gassho, bow, and chanting. Walking, speaking, the expressing subject is in other words the center of the core of self consciousness. In other words, with your body and mind you have to touch, okay, you have to touch the absolute, in other words Buddha. Okay, so when you do gassho, this is expressed form

[59:50]

which means absolute, okay, which means absolute. But who express this form, okay, this self, okay, this body and mind? That's why Dogen says you have to practice with body, okay, with body. So when you do gassho, this is completely absolute, okay. The expressing subject, you have to realize and touch the absolute with the core of the self consciousness. And when you realize and touch the absolute with self consciousness, it is called self awareness, okay, self awareness. In other words, this is wisdom, wisdom, okay, wisdom. So self awareness, awareness is related to our, okay,

[60:57]

your consciousness, okay, your consciousness. That's why you have to think carefully, okay. That's why you have to study, you have to listen to the Buddha's teaching and think carefully and practice it, this is important. Thank you very much. ♪ Nirvana ♪

[61:29]

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