February 29th, 2004, Serial No. 00581

00:00
00:00
Audio loading...

Welcome! You can log in or create an account to save favorites, edit keywords, transcripts, and more.

Serial: 
BZ-00581
AI Summary: 

-

Photos: 
Transcript: 

We have a few more people this morning. Yesterday we sat all day and today we're going to complete our weekend sitting. I've been talking about Dogen Zenji's Heihei Shingi, procedures for monastic practice But before I continue on that subject, I want to talk a little bit about Zazen. A number of people have asked me questions about Zazen, and so I think it's a good idea to talk a little bit about it. You know, often people

[01:03]

who have been sitting for some time forget things about Zazen. And sometimes when people receive Zazen instruction, they don't receive a lot of specific details. And sometimes the philosophy is, well, We show people how to sit Zazen, and then they kind of find their way. I think there's something to that, but I think it's hard to find your way unless you know all the specifics. So when I give Zazen instruction, I'm very detailed. I give very detailed instruction about sitting. I don't leave any part out. And my suggestion to people is, every time you sit Zazen, you should give yourself Zazen instruction, as if you were talking to somebody else.

[02:18]

That way, you don't lose the specifics of Zazen. So every time you sit, I don't mean every day, I mean every time, whenever you sit down for Zazen, to give yourself Zazen instruction. That way, you'll always be sitting with full awareness and full function. Zazen is full function of body, mind, and breath in harmony. So, if you're not aware of how to fully sit in full function, then we miss something. I think that there are two ways that we hurt ourselves in Zazen.

[03:30]

not fully functioning. And the other is resistance. Resistance is the most dangerous. Because resistance is like fighting something that will always win. If you fight He said, if you fight in Zazen, whatever it is that you're fighting will always overpower you. Because we're sitting in the middle, right in the center of the whole weight of the universe. We're sitting right in the center of the whole weight of the universe. And we create a pressure zone around ourselves.

[04:50]

And that pressure zone is like equal pressure between inside and outside. And when the inside pressure collapses, the outside pressure just moves in. And that's called pain. And then when we don't like it, it's called suffering. So we have to keep that pressure equalized all the time. That's called harmonious activity, body, breath, and mind, and the universe. Zazen is the fundamental activity of the universe. Everything in the universe is sitting Zazen at the same time. Zazen is not something special. It's simply sitting in repose.

[05:55]

So we tend to think that the universe is constantly and constantly in dynamic action, which it is. But the other side is the whole universe is sitting in stillness. And stillness and repose is the basic activity. And all the movement comes from the stillness. So when we sit in Zazen, we simply resume our fundamental nature, which is repose or stillness. But at the same time, that stillness is in dynamic activity. So it's the balance between activity and repose.

[06:58]

There are these terms vipassana, samatha, and vipassana. Samatha is basic stillness. Vipassana is the movement which comes out of it. In Zen practice, we talk about samadhi, which is samatha, and prajna, which is intuitive wisdom or the activity. Samadhi and Prajna is like a lamp and its light, according to the Platform Sutra. Samadhi is like the lamp. is the basis, is the fundamental ground.

[08:06]

And Prajna is the light. When we sit in the fundamental ground, then the light of Prajna radiates. So when you see people sitting in Zazen, you walk into the Zendo, there's this profound stillness. At the end of the day of Sashin, you walk into the Zendo and there's this profound stillness, which is the light of Prajna grounded in Samadhi. which is beyond our self-centeredness. So, getting back to giving yourself Zazen instruction.

[09:29]

When we sit in zazen, concentrated in zazen, we sit up straight. When I sit down in zazen, I cross the legs and make the spine straight, keep the head on top of the spine, put the hands in the mudra, put the teeth together, Make sure that the ears are in line with the shoulders, the nose in line with the navel. So there's no leaning any way. It's simply sitting straight up without leaning back and forth or without leaning from side to side. This just doesn't. It's like not leaning to one side or another, not falling into existence, not falling into non-existence, not falling into pleasure, not falling into suffering, not being attached to anything, letting everything come and go as it comes, go as it goes, and continually opening

[11:01]

We also talk about following the breath. But following the breath is secondary. When you have your posture, then you can follow the breath. Let your mind follow the breath. And we follow the breath as the raising and lowering of the abdomen. Sometimes you say, put your mind in your mudra. And the mudra, of course, right there at your abdomen. You watch your breath as the rising and falling of the abdomen. When your breath rises up, there's either some tenseness in your body or your mind, some fear or apprehension or something. And then you lower the breath. Take a deep breath and keep your breath down here.

[12:05]

This is the center of our body. The legs spread out from the center and the trunk rises up, just like a tree. The legs are the roots and the body is the tree. And if you notice a tree, When the wind blows, the trees sway. If the tree doesn't sway in the storm, it gets knocked over. Big trees that don't sway in the storm get knocked over. Grass bends with the wind. So, to keep a straight posture, to concentrate on that, all dirty clothes in. is what Zazen is about. And to keep a flexible mind and a flexible body.

[13:09]

If our body and mind are not flexible, then we feel a lot of discomfort. So what we should keep working at is letting go of tenseness. letting go of fear, anxiety, tenseness. It's simply offering yourself to Dazen. Dazen is your bodily mind offering. It's the same as when we bow. We bow and we lift our hands. We say, you lift Buddha's feet. That's the idea. You lift Buddha's feet. But actually, it's like an offering. It's offering yourself to the universe.

[14:14]

And the universe receives that offering and responds. So when we come to practice, we come with our self and our ego. And then we offer our self and our ego to the practice, to Buddha. Buddha takes care of it. I'll take care of it while you practice. Check your ego. I'll give you a little tag and you can have it on the way out if you want it. So, maintaining balance and maintaining flexibility and openness.

[15:19]

So, one of the problems that we have in Zazen is the problem of pain. As you probably all know. When I was beginning to practice, you know, 40 years ago, I had lots of pain, you know, for years. It was a big struggle to practice, but I was very determined. And I would watch my teacher, and he would sit down, and then he'd get up, you know. He never seemed to have any problem, you know. And I was trying to figure out why he doesn't have a problem, and I do. But little by little, you know, I remember one thing he said that really turned me. He said, talking about pain, as long as you don't like it, it would be a problem.

[16:24]

So I stopped not liking it. And then I realized that if I just open, keep opening to, he always used to say, be one with the pain, just be one with the pain. And then I tried to do that, and then it would be worse. But then I realized that our reactions, our conditioned reactions to intrusion and discomfort will always come up when something intrudes on us. And what intrudes? Well, pain. Of course, it's an intrusion. We want everything to be painless and comfortable.

[17:29]

Unfortunately, we can be comfortable for a little while, but then we say, oh, this is a very comfortable position, and then it becomes uncomfortable. And the most comfortable position, well, if you don't change it, will become uncomfortable. So how do you stay in your position or not and still be comfortable? even though there's what we call painfulness or intrusion. Self-protection. We're very self-protective. And some of us more than others. And some things intrude on some people that don't intrude on others. But nevertheless, we're very self-protective. But in Zazen, you just have to throw all that away.

[18:35]

There's nothing to protect. There's really no one or nothing to protect in Zazen. There's no intrusion. When, you know, something comes, you simply include it. You open up to it. There's no limit. We say, well, there's no limit. Of course there's no limit. But we put limitations. We put limitations on what we can accept. Here's what happens in Dungeon. We sit down and sashay. And that feels pretty good. And then halfway through the period, there's this big intrusion.

[19:41]

And then we try to deal with it. So we're kind of, we know that that will happen. And we kind of wait for it. And then we wait for the bell to ring. So you have to open up from the beginning. You have to be open to every sensation from the beginning, whether it's good or bad. We have to stop judging the sensations as to good or bad. This is this sensation. This is, and then the next moment, this is the next moment's sensation. Now this sensation, now this sensation, now this sensation. And if you open yourself from the beginning to these pleasant sensations, or, you know, not such difficult sensations, then without judging, you find yourself being open to every sensation.

[20:57]

more gradual, and you can accept it. It's like, if you start lifting a baby elephant when it's very small, every day, will you be able to lift it when it's grown up? It's kind of like that. You grow up with it. You go with it. And then there's nothing to fight. No fighting. No resistance. And then, the pressure inside is the same as the pressure outside. So to speak. And you can accept everything because it's not really pain. It's just a sensation. If you think of it as pain and you start to resist it, then you get knee problems. Because what causes those problems is resistance.

[22:02]

When there's openness and no resistance, you may get a problem, but it's less likely. This goes for all of our activities in our lives. What is it that causes our problems? Resistance. Anger. is a kind of resistance. Tenseness is a kind of resistance. Looseness is health. Staying loose, staying flexible, staying light is health. Heaviness, depression, resistance, anxiety, these all lead to ill health. So, we need to stay open, stay loose, stay flexible.

[23:12]

Zazen, you know, looks like the immovable position, which it is, but within that, immovability should be total flexibility. So, you know, I said, this is Zazen. Inside. Outside, it looks like this. But inside, it's just flexibility. When you're sitting, each part of your body is independent from every other part. But it's all held together by harmony, not by rigidity. So all the parts are cooperating. There's nothing forced. It's all cooperation. So if somebody pushes your elbow, just the elbow, just the arm moves.

[24:13]

But if you're stiff, then the whole body goes over. So it's not a statue. Not a statue. It's very flexible. position of balance and openness and harmony. That's Zazen. So the problems that we have in Zazen mostly are from rigidity, fear, resistance, self-concern. I was reading this part of Heihei Shingi yesterday, and he says that the Kannon should be free of self-concern.

[25:21]

That's right. That's Zazen. That's how you take it into your daily life. Freedom, self-consciousness, you're just helping people. You're not worried about yourself, you're just helping people. You're just working for the harmonious, joyful sense of practice with everybody. Wherever you are, whether it's in your workplace, or your home, or your Jacinto. That's Zazen. So it's a joyful practice. We used to say, back in the 30s, it's a great life if you don't weaken. It's a great life if you don't what? Weaken. Weaken. So, you know, sometimes we think of Zazen as an endurance contest.

[26:28]

It's not a contest. It's simply endurance. So you say, well, it's just an endurance contest. Is there something wrong with endurance? Endurance is what our life is about, actually. We all want to endure. And we don't like it when we don't. Oh, so-and-so stopped enduring. I really think that to give yourself Zazen instruction every time you sit, that way you don't forget the points of Zazen. Because Zazen instruction isn't just the beginning of Zazen, it's the whole

[27:33]

time that you're sitting, to give yourself Zazen instruction. Like when we sit, we go over all the points of our posture. We make the rounds, so to speak, the whole time that you're sitting, rather than dreaming. Dreaming is part of Zazen. Let's face it, dreaming is part of Zazen. But it's not the intentional part. It's the unintentional part. The intentional part is to sit. So, the thought of Zazen is Zazen. What do you do with your mind in Zazen? Well, you think the thought of Zazen. You go over the points you find. How's the mudra doing? The mudra collapsed? If the mudra's collapsed, that means that you're getting slothful. If your thumbs are pressing together, that means that there's too much tension in your body.

[28:38]

So the mudra is the barometer of Zazen. It tells you what the weather's like inside. So, you know, the mudra is collapsing and then you straighten up. And then it's gone. Too much tension. You can relax. Are the arms out? Are they kind of squeezing your body? If they're squeezing your body, you know, that's too much tension. Something's wrong, some problem. Maybe your breath is up here. So you relax. So form in Zazen is important. To keep really good form is how you should Zazen. How do I keep the best formal, I don't want to say pose, That's Arnold Schwarzenegger. You know him in California. The position is the formal position.

[29:39]

And when you sit in the formal position, that's the most enjoyable. You really enjoy that. Because it allows you to be totally well-balanced without exerting any more effort than needs to be exerted. It's like doing the most work with the least amount of effort. So we say, when you sit zazen, you sit zazen with great effort. But great effort simply means finding the way to use just the right amount of effort to do the most work.

[30:42]

It's like when you have a big stone and you want to move it. So then you move it with a long bar, right? And if you get up on the stone, you can't move it. But you have to get way to the end of the bar. When you get to the end of the bar, you just go like that. and it moves the stone. The same thing with your body in Zazen. You find, well, where is it? What muscles, what part of my body do I really use to hold me up? Well, is it here? No. Is it here? No. Where is it? Well, you find it. Oh, the lower back. When the lower back is pushed forward, And it provides a good seat for the upper body. And then you find that place where just the right effort, and then you let go of all, you let go of your shoulders, you let go of your arms, and everything falls into place, naturally.

[31:54]

So they just pull, it's called your vertebrae, And it's straight, and the head is on top of the spine. The head is forward, and it puts a weight on the spine. And then you get tired. So, and if it's too far back, this is called ego. Looking up. Ego practice. So, but the ear is still in line with the shoulders. If your ears are in line with your shoulders, then your head won't fall forward. So it's a little tricky, this whole thing with the head. It's very tricky because to keep your head back and not look up. So putting your head back, you do. And then you rotate your head so that you're looking a little bit down. And then you adjust your spine. And you just keep adjusting. Always adjusting. So I've been always

[32:59]

People say, well, I'm not supposed to move in Zazen. That's not what that means. When you sit down, you make an intention, I'm just going to sit here for 40 minutes, or whatever it is, and not move. But you might move. If you move, it's OK. But you don't like it so much. But still, it's OK to move. But the intention is I'm not going to move. I'm going to stay here. But not moving doesn't mean that there's no movement. There's incremental movement all the time. The body is always moving. There's always this subtle change. No matter what kind of a position you put yourself in, things change. So you have to keep reasserting the posture all the time. And that's what you do in Zazen. Instead of thinking about something else, you think about Zazen.

[34:04]

How do I continue to keep this posture? And how do I continue to open up? And how do I continue to relax? So sometimes I say, Zazen is total effort. And then sometimes I say, Zazen is just letting go. It's both. Total effort and letting go. And it's the balance between full function and letting go at the same time. Wonderful activity. But it's just harmonious activity. body, breath, and mind. And it's the function of the universe. We're just doing what the universe does. Do you have a question about that?

[35:13]

Well, there's a lot of pain, and it's And it's moving around rapidly. There's the knee. Oh, suddenly there's the buttock. There's the shoulder. And it's just trying to stay tender with, or gentle with each. I can, I find I can only do it but so long, sometimes. Yeah. That's why we stand up and have kin-hin. But, you know, This is a kind of trial period. I don't mean a try-out period, but a period of trial, you know, where all these barriers come up. But if you keep sitting, you get through the barriers. So, you know,

[36:18]

In this case, oh, my shoulder hurts, or my back, you know, oh, Jesus, how can I sit up? Well, just kind of put your attention in that place and just feel it opening up. Feel it, you know, opening is the most important thing in Zazen. Just feel it opening up. When you have the pain in your knee, just feel that your leg's opening up. Just think, open, open. What does that feel like, to be open? Open, open, and not resisting. Just work on that. Feel the tenseness draining out of your shoulders. Just feel it dripping off. Feel the tension just draining out of your back. Feel the tenseness draining out of your legs. Suzuki Roshi used to say, painful leg sitting on a black cushion.

[37:22]

As soon as I enter into it, it's a problem. Well, it's tempting to use technology like props and, you know, pillows and special zappos that are wedges. I notice you don't use any of that. No. So, the question is, I mean, should we... should we just take whatever... And then to use our own Zahu, because that's the one we're most comfortable with. And it's like, I thought about bringing mine here. It's like, well, I'll just use the one that I'm given and adapt to it. And so the point is to... And how much do you squish the cushion so that you'll be comfortable and you'll end up with this blockage? Or do you just say, I'm just going to sit on it as it is, and if it's hurt, that's my problem? Yeah. There's the basic attitude, and then there's the exceptions.

[38:26]

The basic attitude is adaptation. You adapt to the circumstances. That's the basic thing. But there are exceptions. No matter what I sit on, I have sciatic pain. I had started having sciatic pain when I was about 30 years ago, 25 years ago, 30 years ago, no. And it was really, really strong, really terrible. So I just had to find a cushion that was real soft that would adapt to me. And that worked. I don't have sciatic pain anymore. I had sciatic pain for about 20 years. Every time I'd sit down, you know, sciatic nerve. But I just said, this is just part of Zazen. I don't know how it will go, but that's not going to keep me from sitting Zazen.

[39:37]

But I adapted. People used to look at my cushion. The cushion was so flat and floppy, you know. It was always a joke. But it worked. The cushion adapted to me in that case. So, you know, sometimes you put stuff on your knees, you know, like that. Whenever I give Zazen instruction, I tell people to, even though your knees don't go down, just sit with your legs crossed and eventually your knees will go down. You can't For some people it's easy, you know. But most people, their knees don't go down. And they sit up to put their knees up. And that's an awkward position, but if you keep sitting, little by little, your knees go down. Oh, great, advanced. And then, little by little, oh, it wants to go up here.

[40:41]

And then, oh, it wants to go up here, you know. So you tend to go along with the way things are feeling. But some people, when they give Zazen instruction, and people's knees don't go down, they say, oh, put a cushion under your knees. I don't like that. Because I think we have to go. It's like if you're, I don't think of Zazen as an athletic activity. But there are parallels. And parallel is that if you're an athlete, You know, your body goes through some pain while it's learning, while it's stretching out, while it's learning how to do certain activities, certain sports, you know. So, in that same vein, your body's not used to sitting bow-legged. Your knees are not used to sitting cross-legged for, you know, a long time.

[41:42]

And so it takes some stretching out in order for your body to adjust to the position, and adapt to the position. And you have to give it that time, and you have to give it some, accept some painfulness while that's happening. So, I don't like the idea of props just as props. If there's a real problem, use the props, you know? Use what you need, if there's a real problem. But just because your knees don't go down doesn't mean there's a problem. when you're beginning, it just means you haven't stretched out, you know, that discovery ahead of you. But is it wrong to find a more, like this cushion here, I mean, it's like, it just feels more comfortable. I never, ever used this before. Oh. But I just found that putting it here, it's like a zafu for my hands, and... You know, we say don't lean.

[42:47]

It's okay to put your hands, you know, if you cross your legs, you have your heels come up here. You can touch that, but you don't lean on it for your own convenience. You know, sometimes people hold their mudras up here. I don't. That's not the way we do it, but I do it, but it should be up a little bit, not leaning on something. The less you have to lean on, the more independent you are. The thing about Zazen, actually, is you're not leaning on anything. We take away all the props, and that's important. But it's okay to use them if you really need them. You really need them. But you have to decide that, you know?

[43:48]

And I'm not going to decide that for you. You know, I will say what I do, what I do, but I don't expect everybody to do what I do. But I think it's good if they do, but I don't expect them to do it. I just go straight ahead. I've always done that, you know? I have pain in my knee, I look, you know, like, I just keep sitting with it, and eventually, I go through it. So, my way is, I'll have, my body will get certain problems, you know, it'll be my back, or my knee, or... I haven't had any knee problems for, you know, 20 years. But now, I have some knee problems. I mean, I have some knee, what we call pain. But it's not a problem. It could be, if I let it be. I could say, oh, this is a problem.

[44:50]

You poor thing. And I could really lose it. But I don't. And sometimes it hurts, and sometimes it doesn't. But it's just, you know, I know myself well enough to know that that's just something that's part of my practice, part of loving. And I just go through it. What can you say about the relationship between breathing and opening? What was the first word? Breathing. Breathing and opening. Breathing is very important in opening. We keep the breath down here, and what we feel is the lower abdomen, because it's in your lungs, but it feels like it's in your lower abdomen.

[45:54]

So, if you pay attention to the exhale, put effort in the exhale, then that tends to aerate your body. So, you make a silent sound. when you exhale. Exhale is deep and longer. Inhaling is shorter and more. And you can push down on your diaphragm when you exhale. That's more Rinzai style. It's pushing down on your diaphragm when you exhale. Especially if you're in trouble. You know, you don't know what to do next. You're sitting in sushi and, you know, you're in agonies, kind of, you know, really push down on the breath, on the exhale.

[47:00]

And that tends to open things up, you know, kind of like aeration. Sometimes, you know, it's so you get into a position where it's very painful and you can't stop sitting and you can't... You're at the end of your rope and you have to do something. So you just get into the breath. The breath saves you. And it's just one breath. One breath. And that's all there is. It's just this breath, this breath. And instead of moving, you just go deeper into breathing. And the breath covers the whole world. That's all there is.

[48:02]

That's real good concentration. And then after that, you feel, you stand up and you feel very concentrated. and open even though you make sure you're wobbling. The purpose of pain is probably to protect our bodies and I think one thing that's hard to figure out sometimes if the pain that you're having is really a signal that what you're doing is harmful and I've had problems with sciatica and I've always interpreted that as Don't do it. I don't want to, you know, I don't want to damage that nerve, but it sounds like your experience is to just go through with it. Well, see, my experience is, my, is, um, uh, it's okay to die and love him. I'd want your feet to work when you stand up.

[49:05]

It doesn't matter. You know, we're, I think Zazen, to have that intention is more important than to be, you know, I'm okay. I'm 75 in July. I walk up mountains. I'm flexible. I'm pretty healthy. Everything works. I don't have any arthritis. So, and I've been in those positions, you know. But to me, that dedication is more important than worrying about... But it works, it's always worked out.

[50:06]

Always worked out. And also, In any endeavor, there's always an occupational hazard. You know, you're a doctor, and you might get some, you know, disease working in a hospital. But you do it anyway. So, that's kind of like that. But, I don't recommend that everybody do what I do. But, because in order to do it that way, you have to be totally dedicated. Otherwise it doesn't work. We always look for those people who are totally dedicated.

[51:14]

That's who we pass the dharma down to. Practice, or religious practice especially, doesn't work unless people are totally dedicated to it with their lives. They used to throw the Christians to the lions, right? That's what made Christianity work. Because people were willing to let themselves be thrown to the lions for that. What about us lay people? What kind of people? Many people are just the same.

[52:14]

No difference. If we can't totally dedicate ourselves. But who says we can't? You know, you can totally dedicate yourself while living at home. You dedicate yourself to your work, your family, your zazen, whatever you do. Whatever you do, you do it thoroughly. That's lay practice, and that's priest practice. It's the same practice. There's no difference. One priest is a visible carrier of the Dharma, practitioner of the Dharma. And a lay person blends in with. society. But it's the same practice.

[53:19]

No difference. Yesterday you talked about, if I heard you correctly, you talked about something about it being easier to practice in association with others. I've always thought the monastic life or the life of the monk would be more rigorous, more difficult, but in a way it almost seems like the lay life would be the more difficult because of the distraction. So let's be careful though. Monastic life has its easy way, it also has its difficulty. Lay life has its easy way, it also has its difficulty. But they're different. They're kind of like the opposites in a way.

[54:19]

There's great advantage to lay practice, and there's great difficulty in it. And the same thing with monastic practice. So each one, you know, there are just two sides. Monastic practice is everybody's living together in the same community and, you know, following the schedule and it's a wonderful life. But there are also big problems that come up in it, you know, sexuality and loneliness and unavailability to the outside. Whereas in the lay practice, you have all this availability and so forth, but you don't have the, you know, as much So that's why a lay practice can have its sociability, associative way to practice together.

[55:37]

And I think that's what you should be working toward, how the Sangha works together, and the Sangha is working together, and everybody's, you know, contributing, then you feel it really helps everybody's practice. So, you know, but it's still, if it wasn't so, there wouldn't be any practice. It's just that it has difficulties, but There are ways of working with difficulties to make it work. With lay practice, one has to be very flexible and know how much to expect and how much not to expect, and how to work with people so that they contribute but not overextend themselves.

[56:40]

All of this is very delicate. and it takes a lot of discernment to be able to work with so that everybody feels included and people don't feel overextended and yet they feel like they're doing something. So it takes a lot of sensitivity to make it work. not to be afraid to delegate to people so that people feel they have responsibility. As soon as people feel they have responsibility, then they feel included, they feel it empowers them. So the more people feel they have responsibility, the more empowered everybody feels, and the more they feel like working together. Probably past time.

[57:44]

@Text_v004
@Score_JJ