came back and started practicing again. And her husband, Sandy, is a wonderful painter. non-objective painter, which is what I used to be. So I have that kind of affinity with him. I was a painter back in the 50s and 60s. And during this practice period, we will study the Tenzo Kyokun of Dogen Zenji.

[01:06]

Tenzo Kyokun is Master Dogen's advice, I guess you'd call it, to the head cook, the Tenzo. This Tenzo Kyokun, it's not so long, but it's very pissy because it brings forth Dogen's understanding of practice as enlightenment. Not seeking enlightenment, but bringing forth enlightenment through our practice. So I've taught that before, but it's such a seminal piece that I think we need to continuously review it, and every time we review it, we enter it.

[02:08]

So it's not just an intellectual study, it's how we actually do stuff. how we practice in our everyday life as activity. You know, Suzuki wrote, people said that, used to say back in the, when Suzuki Roshi came to America, there were a number of Zen masters who came, mostly Rinzai Zen teachers. So Suzuki Roshi was like, the anchor for the Soto Zen teaching in San Francisco. And they were always, those teachers were often, were always emphasizing kinshō, or have an enlightenment experience.

[03:10]

They drove their students to have enlightenment experiences. But Suzuki Roshi, practice itself was enlightenment. We didn't have to drive ourselves to practice enlightenment, to drive us to have an enlightenment experience, because all of our experiences are enlightenment experiences. He said we should have an enlightenment experience moment by moment. Why try to create some special thing? So people would come to him sometimes, and they would relay their enlightenment experiences to him. And he'd listen to them, and then he'd say, yes, and, yes, and, and they could never answer. He would say, most of your enlightenment experiences, so-called, fall short.

[04:12]

So people would say, well, you know, this Soto Zen guy, Suzuki Roshi, never got enlightened. That kind of went around. People would say, oh, he never got enlightened. But he never talks about enlightenment. How come your teacher never talks about enlightenment? you know, those who talk about it don't have it, and those who have it don't talk about it. So for Suzuki Roshi and for Dogen and for many good teachers, is within your activity, it's not in your head. Matter of fact, if you think you have it, you don't have it.

[05:23]

Because any idea we have about enlightenment is just an idea about enlightenment, that's all. Any idea we have about anything is just an idea about anything. So, enlightenment is brought forth through practice. And practice verifies your enlightenment. And this is Dogen's understanding, and this is also Suzuki Roshi's understanding. So instead of talking about enlightenment, he would always talk about practice. Because practice is enlightenment, even though we don't realize it. We don't realize it. As soon as you catch a glimpse of enlightenment, it's gone. When you don't see it, it's there.

[06:28]

When you do see it, it's not. So you can be it, but you can't see it. It's like your eyes. You can see through your eyes, but your eyes can never see themselves. So then we're always wondering about this enlightenment thing. So enlightenment manifests through our confusion and through our activity, good or bad, right or wrong. I want to read you a little about what Suzuki Roshi says about it.

[07:34]

Because he did talk about it. And it is in print, but if you talk about it too much, excuse me. So, to have a so-called enlightenment experience is, of course, important. It is important to have an enlightenment experience, even though you don't know what that is, even though you have it and don't understand it. But what is more important is to know how to adjust the flame in zazen and in our everyday life. How to adjust the flame, like on a stove. If you're used to using kerosene lamps, which we did at Tassajara, we didn't have electricity for years and years in our monastery at Tassajara, and we always used kerosene lamps. So he's using that as an example.

[08:40]

How you, you know, if you, there's a little round button that you turn to adjust the flame. If it's too high, it flames out and blackens the chimney. And if it's too low, you can't really see. So how do you adjust it so that it doesn't smoke? When it doesn't smoke, you don't, you forget about it. But when it's smoking, then, you know, there's something out of adjustment. So how do you keep adjusting your flame? Because we all have a flame. Each one of us is a flame. How do we adjust our flame so that it doesn't create a problem? Like, stinky. If you have too much zen, you know, That's like adjusting the flame too high. And you say, Zen stink. Stinking of Zen.

[09:43]

So you want to forget all about Zen. That's best. Just do the work and forget about Zen. Zen is there when you can forget about it. Enlightenment is there when you can forget about it. So to have a so-called enlightenment experience is of course important, but what is more important is to know how to adjust the flame in zazen and in our everyday life. When the flame is in complete combustion, you don't smell the oil. When it is smoky, you'll smell something. You may realize that it is a kerosene lamp. When your life is in complete combustion, you have no complaint and there's no need to be aware of your practice. If we talk too much about Zazen, it's already a smoky kerosene lamp. Maybe I'm a very smoky kerosene lamp. I don't necessarily want to give you a lecture.

[10:48]

I just want to live with you. Moving stones. This is a Tassajara. We're always moving stones. Having a nice hot spring bath and eating something good. Zen is right there. When I start to talk, it's already a smoky kerosene lamp. As long as I must give a lecture, I have to explain, this is right practice, this is wrong, this is how we practice Datsen. It's like giving you a recipe. It doesn't work. You cannot eat a recipe. Ed Brown just wrote another cookbook. I don't know if you're familiar with his cookbooks. He's written a number of cookbooks, good ones. And his latest cookbook is No Recipe. Usually a Zen master would say, practice Zazen, then you will attain enlightenment.

[11:50]

If you attain enlightenment, you will be detached from everything and you will see things as it is. Of course, this is true. But our way is not always so. That's where Michael got the name for his book. We are studying how to adjust the flame of our lamp back and forth. Dogen Zenji made this point in the Shobo Genzo. His teaching is to live each moment in complete combustion. Like a lamp or a candle, to live each moment becoming one with everything is the point of his teaching and his practice. Zazen practice is a very subtle thing. When you practice Zazen, you become aware of things you did not notice while you were working. Today, I moved stones for a while, and I didn't realize that my muscles were tired. But when I was calmly sitting Zazen, I realized, oh, my muscles are in pretty bad condition.

[12:54]

I felt some pain in the various parts of my body. You might think you could practice zazen much better if you had no problem. But actually, some problem is necessary. If you don't have a big one, it doesn't have to be a big one. Through the difficulty you have, you can practice zazen. So this is a very important point. We're always wanting to be comfortable. That's our plan. Most of us, not everyone, but most of us try to be comfortable. And when we sit, we also want to be comfortable. But unfortunately, or fortunately, we have a big problem at some point. At some point, you will have a problem. We're going to sit a five-day session at the end of the practice period. And you should all be comfortable.

[13:58]

But unfortunately, unfortunately, you will have a problem. But the problem is the practice. Without a problem, really hard to practice. Because when we experience life, life is nothing but problems, one after another. Every moment is a problem and every moment is a solution. whether we like it or not, has nothing to do with like and dislike. When it has nothing to do with like and dislike, we have enlightenment. Enlightenment is the acceptance of every moment as it is, regardless of like and dislike. Not like there's no like or dislike, Enlightenment is the reconciliation of like and dislike.

[15:02]

It's rising above our desires. You know, we keep changing our equipment all the time. We have to keep moving because that's life. Life keeps moving. That's called emptiness. Emptiness means various things, but it means forgetting the last moment and entering the next one. Not being caught by the last moment. So it's expressing the wish. The wish for enlightenment is to let go of the last moment, letting go of this moment and entering the next moment. If we can't let go of the last moment, we can't enter the next moment with freedom.

[16:10]

So when we sit sadhana, moment after moment, we enter the next moment without hanging on to the last moment, without attachment to the last moment. no matter how nice that is. Soon as we feel some very nice feeling in Zazen, we want to stay there. But unfortunately or fortunately, the next moment pops up. And if we don't let go of the last moment, we can't enter the next moment with ease. So Zazen actually is very comfortable. But it's only comfortable when we let go of the last moment and enter the next moment with ease, regardless of how we're feeling. It takes a long time to learn. It really takes a long time to learn for most people.

[17:15]

Attachment is so subtle. Our attachments are so subtle. And freedom is so difficult to achieve. So, problem will come up for us all the time. And dealing, you know, you can't fight the difficulties you have. Fighting the difficulties doesn't work because it simply makes—fighting creates more fighting. Fighting creates an opposite, an opposition, and the opposition will always win. You will always win when you fight. If you fight the pain, you will always win. The whole universe is bearing down on your body.

[18:19]

There's a certain amount of pressure inside and outside that keeps us comfortable, right, in this universe. But there's certain pressures that make it difficult. And if you become attached to the difficulties, you will suffer. The First Noble Truth is about suffering. And Zazen is about the Four Noble Truths. If you fight, you will lose. So you have to be, what is it that fights? It's our self-centeredness that fights. It's our self-centeredness that creates problems. When we let go of our self-centeredness, no matter how articulate we are at denying this, when we let go of our self-centeredness, we can enjoy whatever's happening.

[19:34]

Although there are extreme things that happen to us that we can do nothing about. But even then, what do you do? So life is difficult, and this is, you know, I'm not talking about what is the truth. I'm simply talking about how you find ease within your difficulties. People find different ways to do that, but they don't sit thousand, because there's only one way. to find ease in Zazen. Zazen is a great teacher. The teacher simply points that out. I can't help you, except I can just point you to how to deal with the difficulties in Zazen.

[20:39]

To simply open yourself, because it's counterintuitive. When you have an intrusion, It's counterintuitive to open to it, because usually when we have an intrusion, we want to oppose it. That's natural. It's natural to want to stop, stop, but actually to open itself to it. And when you open yourself, you're opening yourself to the universe, and you let the universe pass through. And that's called adjusting the lamp. Adjusting the lamp needs to not create a smoky situation. It's called calmness of mind, called various things. Calmness of the mind.

[21:45]

offering yourself to the universe. That's what I think of Zazen is when you put forth your effort and at the same time letting go of any resistance. That's comfort, true comfort. I remember how many difficult times I had when I was a little younger, a lot younger, in Zazen, trying to figure out how to be comfortable. It was so difficult, so much pain. Sitting through seven days of pain until I finally figured it out. I didn't figure it out, it just happened. You just open yourself up instead of, it's counterintuitive. But then if you open yourself up too soon, you think, well, then the flood of pain, but it doesn't work that way.

[23:02]

It's knowing how to create the balance. Balance and harmony is creating the balance, always working with, because everything is falling out of balance and regaining its balance moment after moment. That's enlightenment. That's enlightened practice, regaining your balance moment after moment with everything. That's how you live in the universe in a comfortable way. You follow the balance and then you regain your balance and you harmonize with everything. how you harmonize with your surroundings, how you harmonize with all the parts of your body, actually. Harmonizing with your limbs and your organs and your thoughts, your mind, your balance.

[24:12]

Sazen is balance. In Zazen, we're always falling out of balance. You say, well, this is the right posture. Now I've got it. But two minutes later, it's changed because everything's changing, including your posture. There's no special right posture. You assume the right posture, but then you have to continue to find your balance and open up. I can't explain this opening. I try to explain what it means to be open, but it's hard. It means that when you allow every sensation to be there, just allow every sensation to be there, and then you, by allowing it, it opens you up instead of closing you down. When we have a limit, then the energy finds that limit in your body.

[25:19]

And then you have a problem. When you have no limit, then you expand to include everything that happens to you. And then you're comfortable because you don't have a limit that shuts you down. Then you're comfortable. That's called the comfortable way. You never let yourself get caught by attachment to any feeling. Not wanting, not not wanting. Anyway. He says, this is an especially meaningful point, which is what Dogenzinji says, practice and enlightenment are one.

[26:24]

Practice is something you do consciously, something that you do with effort. There, right there, is enlightenment. Many masters, many Zen masters missed this point while they were striving to attain perfect Zazen. Things that exist are imperfect. That is how everything actually exists in this world. Nothing we see or hear is perfect. But right there in the imperfection is perfect reality. It is true intellectually and also in the realm of practice. It is true on paper and true with your body. You may think that you can only establish true practice after you attain enlightenment, but it's not so. True practice is established in delusion, in frustration. If you make some mistake, that is where you establish your practice.

[27:28]

There is no other place for you to establish your practice. We talk about enlightenment, but in its true sense, perfect enlightenment is beyond our understanding, beyond our experience. Even in our imperfect practice, enlightenment is there. We just don't know it. So the point is to find the true meaning of practice before we attain enlightenment. Wherever you are, enlightenment is there. If you stand up right where you are, that is enlightenment. Not knowing who you are or where you are. This is called, I don't know Zazen. We don't know what Zazen is anymore. I don't know who I am. To find complete composure when you don't know who you are or where you are, that is to accept things as it is. Even though you don't know who you are, you accept yourself.

[28:32]

That is you in its true sense. When you know who you are, that you will not be the real you. You may overestimate yourself quite easily, but when you say, I don't know, then you are you, and you know yourself completely, and that is enlightenment. So I think our teaching is very good, but If we become arrogant and believe in ourselves too much, we will be lost. There will be no teaching, no Buddhism at all. When we find the joy of our life in our composure, we don't know what it is. We don't understand anything, and then our mind is very great and very wide. Our mind is open to everything, so it is big enough to know before we know something. We are grateful even before we have something. Even before we attain enlightenment, we're happy to practice our way. Otherwise, we can't attain anything in its true sense. Do you have a question?

[29:57]

Ron? He was pointing at, I don't know. You know, here's where we have a problem. We have a problem because our thinking is always dualistic. You know, Suzuki Roshi, dualistic thinking is delusion. Monistic thinking is enlightenment. But enlightenment and delusion go together. They're two sides of the same coin. So we have to have delusion. So when he says, When he contradicts himself, it's just one side of the coin.

[30:59]

If you say, there's no life or death, that's one side of the coin. If you say, well, there's birth and death, life and death, right? That's the other side of the coin. The middle. Yes, it's like Joshu's Mu. The monk said, does the dog have the Buddha nature? And Joshu said, no. And then a monk came and said, does the dog have Buddha nature? He said, yes. Is it yes or no? No includes yes. Yes includes no. Enlightenment includes delusion. Delusion includes enlightenment. I don't know who I am." That's when you know who you are. When you don't know who you are, that's when you know who you are.

[32:04]

If you know who you are, that's when you don't know who you are. So this is the way Suzuki Roshi was thinking. He wasn't thinking in dualistic terms, although duality is part of non-duality. Okay, so we chant, you know, may all beings feel... All what? May all beings, you know, feel, have ease, nothing to do with the metaphor or what not. May all beings... May all beings feel, be at ease, have peace. to get going, and I could struggle, you know, whatever.

[33:07]

But then I saw this little button that I had from Standing Rock, and this beautiful hand saying, no, no, go access pipeline. Oh, to the pipeline, yes. And all of a sudden I felt this ease, and this peace, remembering that experience. And then it was so much easier to get out the door. So I just offered that as an example that that, or whatever, sometimes the struggle is part of our practice and sometimes we use it. Well, yes. Or something. I wouldn't, yes, I wouldn't say the struggle, I would say the effort. The effort, well, yeah. Effort is not necessarily a struggle. Effort is putting yourself, without effort there's no practice. But that doesn't have to be a struggle. Effort and ease are the two sides of that coin. And Zazen is the coin itself, and within the coin itself is effort, sit up straight, balance, and ease.

[34:22]

Letting go means opening yourself up. So within the strictest effort to sit up straight is the ease to balance that so that it's effortless. It's effortless effort. It's not no effort. It's effortless effort, means not struggling but being totally present. This is Dogen's practice, it's called thoroughness. Thoroughness means there's nothing left out. There's no shoe hanging over the coffin. I don't know if you get that. Is that Judy? Okay, short.

[35:23]

Well, first of all, everything is just as it is. That's universal love. Everything is just as it is. And then there are its variants, like I love you, things like that. But universal, universal, when you think universal, you can't even encompass universal. in your mind, that's just an idea, but if you want to experience universal love, everything is just as it is.

[36:41]

To see everything just as it is and address everything just as it is, including yourself. Including the feeling of hate. No, it doesn't mean you have to like hate. But you have to see it. John? I'm not sure if I heard it correctly, but I thought I heard that you were saying that if we are too much of Dazen, it could be that we're too open or too... No, I didn't say that. Okay, there's no, everything comes flooding in, I heard that phrase, and I'm not sure where... I don't know where you heard it either. I said, when you're totally open, you include everything. That's what I said. That I remember. Well, this book is called Not Always So.

[37:47]

Somebody way in the back, I think it's you. Yeah. How do we open towards unwholesome intrusions? Open to what? Towards unwholesome intrusions like sexism and racism and bigotry. How do we turn towards those? Well, you just open to them. I don't know, I'm not sure exactly what you would mean by that exactly. It doesn't mean, you know, we have to address those things that are so-called injustices, right?

[38:50]

So address them. Address them fully. Accept that everything has its opposite. We always have to remember that everything has its opposite. And when we say this is the truth, it's only half of the truth, even though it seems like the whole truth. Unless we address this opposite, it's only half the truth. And the world goes off on half-truths, because it's either good or bad. It's either right or wrong. It's either hot or cold, and so forth. Everything has its opposite. And if we don't take into consideration its opposite, it doesn't mean we have to buy its opposite. But if we don't take into consideration its opposite, then we're just running around putting bandages on everything. There's no real cure.

[39:53]

So, we have the Republicans and the Democrats. Each one wants to eliminate the other. I'd say that every day. I want to eliminate the one that I don't like, that's going to ruin the world. But it's necessary. Nothing exists without its opposite. You can't keep chopping off the things you don't like, or the opposites, because then as soon as you chop off the opposites, the thing itself doesn't exist. Good only exists with bad. Bad only exists with good. If you want everything to be good, you want to eliminate all the bad things. And so we, you know, this is primitive thinking. It's really primitive, desert thinking. You know, you kill off all the guys you don't like. Al Capone. Valentine's Day, if you get what I mean,

[40:59]

You just kill off all the people you don't like. But this doesn't work. Everything needs this opposite. The crooks need the cops. The cops need the crooks. The bad guys need the good guys. And until we understand that, we can't cure things. Is that Linda? Hi. But there are wiser ways to talk about it. We could talk about harmful and not-harmful, so that we don't get caught in another trap. Yes, but harmful and unharmful are, yeah, you can talk about any opposite you like.

[42:07]

But what I want to say is, if you just, Well, I wouldn't. You know, you have to understand that talking about things, even so-called truths, does not cover everything. You know, it doesn't mean you don't have to do something about things, right? I mean, when you see the the locomotive coming down the tracks, you have to get out of the way.

[43:11]

So, there are major understandings and so-called minor understandings. What a major understanding does is give us a big problem about what bothers us. But reality is what it is. If you say, these people should die and those people should not die, everybody dies. That's the whole truth. That's what I'm talking about. I'm not talking about the particulars, right? In the particulars, you make choices about what you want to do based on, but if you understand The reality, you can make better choices. I'm not saying you shouldn't make choices based on what, you know, the things that you bring up, of course.

[44:19]

But someone else thinks a different way. You have to understand that, you have to take that into consideration. This is the last one, album. distinguishing between someone's actions and that person. And I think that that's a way of framing what we're talking about. So, this is what Dr. King talked about. You love the person, and you sit back and hate the action. And so, we have to be able to distinguish in our minds Well, nobody said.

[45:35]

Yes, my vow is to turn Trump into a loving... I actually give him lectures in my mind. I do. But he doesn't listen to me. This is the end. Oh, well, yeah. OK. The guy, the guy behind Ellen. Well, on that note... We're going to lose our non-profit status or something.

[47:16]

So, back to work.

[47:24]

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