Before I continue with my commentary on Suki Roshi's lecture, I want to talk a little bit more about sitting at home or wherever. I want to clarify the fact that you can sit anywhere you want, anytime you want. Without asking me. It's none of my business. Which does not preclude sangha practice. So, Sangha practice is Sangha practice, but you could... who cares, you know? As I've said before many times, it's good to have a little setup, you know, like an altar somewhere in your house, and a cushion, and to do zazen there.

[01:31]

maybe hang a scroll or something, you know, make it a nice place. It's your personal zindo. And You know, what I always suggest to people about practice, people say, well, how shall I practice? How can I make sure that I'm practicing? And I say, well, decide which days you're coming to the Zendo to do Sangha practice. And then the rest of the time, you sit by yourself. But if you only sit by yourself, it's not Sangha practice. called the practice of Pacheka Buddha. One who's interested in their own practice but not necessarily helpful to others.

[02:39]

Not contributing to the practice of others. So we call it selfish practice. But it doesn't have to be selfish practice. if you have Sangha practice. So the three gems of Buddhism, Buddha, Dharma, Sangha. If one of them is missing, then it's not complete practice. And if we're only practicing for our own benefit, it's not truly Zazen. in the complete sense of the word. But you should be able to do zazen anywhere, anytime.

[03:47]

I remember when I first started to practice and I had my first toothache. I was around, well, 35 or 36. I didn't actually have a cavity until then. I was about 40. But anyway, I had this toothache. So I went to the dental school because I didn't have any money. And when you go to the dental school, you have to wait for all day before they see you. So I sat in the chair and I said, well, I'll just do a Zazen sitting in a chair. And that was great. I really, you know, I sat Zazen all day sitting in a chair and I wasn't waiting for the dental student to work on my tooth.

[04:52]

And because I was sitting Zazen, I was just content to be where I was, sitting in the chair. So we should be able to sit Zazen everywhere, anytime. You know, it doesn't need a cushion or a zafu. We should know how to sit Zazen in a chair. And the best way to sit Zazen in a chair, wherever you are, is to sit as if you were on a cushion. So you're not leaning back against the back of the chair, but you're using your back for support. Unless, of course, you can't do that, then you have to use the back of the chair for support. But if you're fortunate enough to be able to sit up straight without doing that, to sit as if you're on a cushion, it's a very good way, actually, to sit. Anyway, where I left off was, he says, when we put emphasis on selflessness,

[06:19]

So if a teacher, teacher's or disciple's practice of ritual or observation of precepts is not selfless, then that's not the true way. When we practice together, we should forget our own practice. I think what that means is that we should forget that we're not practicing just for ourself. Forget our own practice means forget that we're just practicing for ourselves and simply throw ourselves into the practice for the sake of practice. It is each individual's practice, yet it is also others' practice. For instance, when we practice chanting, we say, recite the sutra with your ears. Then with our ears, we listen to others, while with our mouths, we practice our own practice. So here we have complete egolessness in its true sense. So egolessness includes ourself.

[07:21]

If we try to get rid of our ego, we can't do it because it's the ego that's trying to get rid of itself. So if the ego looks for the ego, it can't find it. So we have a big problem. Ego is our nature. So we start cutting off ego, it's like cutting off your fingers, you know. Finally you get up to your arm and you say, oh wait a minute. So if the disciple's practice of ritual or observation or precept is not selfless, what is selfless observation of ritual? When you bow, that you're actually totally involved in the bow, that's selfless ritual.

[08:35]

It's not like you just you know, doing something by habit. But your whole body-mind is totally involved in the bow, even though the bow is casual. And when you offer food to the sangha, when you're serving someone, There's actual... The server, the served, and the serving are all empty. There's no one being served, there's no one serving, and there's nothing to serve. At the same time, there's someone being served, there's a server, and there's something

[09:38]

to serve. This is a selfless way. It includes our self. Selfless way includes our self. But there are no objects. By including our self, our self includes the server, the served. The self includes what is being served. Although they're three separate things, they're one thing. It's like when Suzuki Roshi was saying, when you sit in the full lotus, your right foot is on the left thigh, your left foot is on the right thigh, you don't know which is which. At the same time, left foot is left foot, and right foot is right foot.

[10:41]

Don't get mixed up. You are you, and the person being served is the person being served. So, to recite the sutra with your ears, I remember when Suzuki Roshi came out with that statement, We used to chant the Heart Sutra three times in Japanese. That was our service at that time. And there was always one person who was way off on the pitch. And it was just, you know, really difficult. So he said, please recite the sutra with your ears. He wouldn't go to somebody and criticize them, but he just may say something that everybody could relate to, which is a very nice way to bring up a point when you want to criticize something.

[11:46]

It's very delicate, you know, criticism is a very delicate thing. So he would just make a nice statement, you know, that everybody could relate to. And if the shoe fit, you could wear it. But sometimes the person to whom the shoe was offered wouldn't step into it. Nevertheless, This brings up the point of chanting. When we chant, we should listen as well as chant. If you only hear yourself, you know that something's missing. So the main thing is to really hear everyone. And when you hear everyone, when you really listen, then you can actually blend with the chanting. If you're not listening, it's hard to blend with the chanting. you're only listening to your own voice.

[12:49]

So blending with the chanting is, that's how you let go of ego. But at the same time, you're still there. So we have our own practice at that time and we also have selfless practice at that time. It's really hard sometimes to just listen. But Oh yeah.

[13:53]

People say, well, some people just are tone-deaf. Well, tone-deaf mostly means that person's not really concentrating. Most people can't hear tones, the difference between tones. But it's harder for some people than for others. you really make an effort, even though you may think, oh, I'm tone deaf. If you really make an effort, you can actually find the tones. So it may take a little work. Some people have it naturally, other people have to work at it. So it's something to work with. Anyway. Then he says, egolessness does not mean to give up your own individual practice. I have my practice, you have your practice, and we have our practice.

[14:57]

True egolessness should forget egolessness, as long as you believe my practice is egoless, or my practice is to give up ego. means you stick to ego because you stick to giving up ego-centered practice. You stick to giving up something. So this is an interesting point. You know, we don't try to say that you should give up your ego or you should try to be this way or that way. We see everybody as who they are. The first thing, I think, is to just recognize each one of us as who we are and what our propensities and personalities and difficulties and so forth are. It's like a persimmon. You know, when persimmons are not ripe, they're really astringent. You don't want to bite into them. But when a persimmon ripens, it becomes sweet, very sweet.

[16:01]

But if you try to take the astringency out of the persimmon before it gets ripe, it won't get sweet. So practice is a matter of patience, great patience and transformation and development so that these qualities which are undesirable hold within themselves the possibility of transformation. into their opposite. So we say, you know, angry Buddha is a big Buddha, or greedy Buddha is a big Buddha, or deluded Buddha is a big Buddha. We don't reject that, those qualities.

[17:06]

But those qualities are our koan. And it's like the pearl, like the grain of sand in the oyster. You work with these qualities all the time until they become transformed. This is the basis of transformation in consciousness, which I will not go into right now. When you practice with your own practice together with others, then true egolessness happens. That egolessness is not just egolessness. It also includes ego practice. So, you know, people say, well, I'm not really good enough to practice yet because I have all these bad qualities. But we bring all these qualities to our practice, and then these qualities become the energizing qualities of practice.

[18:21]

If you have a lot of anger, you can bring the anger into zazen. And the energy of that anger will give you very strong zazen. You sit with the anger and you put the anger into your posture, the energy from the anger into posture and into attention and then the anger disappears and you only have the quality of the energy. So if you know how to do that, the anger becomes transformed. It also includes ego practice, but at the same time it is the practice of egolessness that is beyond ego or egolessness.

[19:27]

Ego and egoless are a duality. So this is the koan. Ego, where is the actual truth between ego and egoless? So we hold within this ego the seeds of transformation and we have to let the process work itself out. That's why we have to be very patient with each other. The teacher often recognizes these qualities in the student and points them out.

[20:44]

And sometimes the student doesn't like it. But the teacher has to be very patient. Joshu says, it's okay if you slobber all over me. So then he says, this is also true in the observation of precepts. If you try to observe the precepts, that is not true observation of precepts. This is Suzuki Roshi's stand, always on precepts. If you try to observe the precepts one by one, this is not the observation of precepts. I think it would have been nice for him to say, this is not necessarily the observation of precepts, because it isn't not. Pardon the double negative.

[21:45]

But when you observe the precepts without trying to observe the precepts, that is true observation of precepts. And then he explains what he means by that. There is a positive way of observing precepts and a negative way. although these ways should not be different. To observe the precepts should be to not observe the precepts at the same time. Not to observe the precepts means that without trying to observe the precepts, you observe them. Anyway, we have to observe the precepts. So he says, our inmost nature can help us observe the precepts. When we understand the precepts as an expression of our inmost nature, that is the way as it is. So, you know, precepts are not something imposed on us.

[22:51]

Precepts are something, is our own inmost request for clarity, for reality, for truth. for a right action. Sometimes we see precepts as a binder, like straps around a barrel to keep it from coming apart. Something that binds us so that we don't do anything wrong. But that's not what he means by precepts. He says, when we understand the precepts as an expression of our inmost nature, that is the way as it is, then there are no precepts. When we are expressing our inmost nature, no precepts are necessary, so we are not observing any precepts. In another talk, Sugiyoshi said, precepts simply means, observing precepts means compassion.

[24:01]

Ji-hi. Compassionate action, which is our deep nature, to be compassionate. So when we act out of compassion in a true way, We don't need to refer to the precepts, to the 10 precepts or the 250 precepts. But, on the other hand, he says, we have the opposite nature, so we want to observe our precepts. We feel that the necessity of observing the precepts will help us. And when we understand the precepts in this negative or prohibitory sense, that is also the blossoming of our true nature. So there is the positive precepts and the negative precepts. The positive precepts are do the right thing out of compassion, out of your inmost nature.

[25:12]

The negative precepts are, don't kill, don't steal, don't do this, don't do this, don't do this. That's negative. Don't, don't, don't. So when we receive the precepts, the grave precept, don't, don't, don't, don't. Then we say, geez, you know, that's, whoa, you know. But there are also the positive precepts, do, do, do, do. That's what he's talking about. But the do is what's natural, and the don't is what we should avoid. Be careful to avoid. So we have a choice of how to observe precepts. One negative, the other positive. Also, when we do not feel that we can observe all the precepts, then we can choose some which we feel we can work with. So sometimes people say, well, I've been hesitant to take the precepts because I don't think I can keep them all.

[26:19]

That's no reason to not take the precepts because nobody can keep them all. All the people that have taken the precepts, nobody can keep them all exactly as they're written. Matter of fact, if you keep the precepts exactly as they're written, something's missing. because precepts are living precepts. So when he's talking about the positive precepts, he's talking about the actual living precepts as you live your life, which cannot conform to something that's written down as rules, because life transcends rules. rules are like this, and life is like this. So that's good, you know.

[27:22]

We have a straight line and a wavy line. And the straight line helps the wavy line to, you know, ground it, ground the wavy line. And the wavy line gives life to the straight line. To pick out, to just work with the precepts that you can work with, that's good. And to work with the precepts that you can't work with, that's also good, maybe better. I can just never stop gossiping about people. So I don't think I can take the precepts. Very difficult.

[28:28]

So precepts are not rules set up by someone. Since our life is the expression of our true nature, if something is wrong with that expression, then Buddha will say that it's not the way. In other words, if you have a Sangha practice, you will soon learn that your mistakes will be pointed out to you. you're mistaken away will be pointed out to you. So since our life is the expression of our true nature, if something is wrong with that expression, in other words if we're off in that positive way, if it's not really coming from the true place, then Buddha will tell us. Then you will have precepts. The actual event or fact is first, not the Buddha did not come out with a whole bunch of rules for practice, but as cases came up, the monks would bring him an example.

[29:38]

They'd say, so-and-so is, you know, having sex with a statue. You laugh, you laugh, but that example is in the Vinaya. Plus other examples that are even more bizarre. James. What kind of mugs? What kind of mugs did he have? What was Buddha's response to this situation? He said, you can't do that. So every example that you can possibly think of came up to Buddha and was written down. So there is a book that has all of these examples in it.

[30:44]

So the fact comes first and then the event comes first, not the rules. the rules come after. So it is the nature of precepts that we have a chance to choose our precepts. If you go one way, you will have these precepts. And if you take another way, you will have some other precepts. Whether you go this way or that way is up to you. Either way you will have some precepts, no matter how you go. Even if you reject all the precepts, still there are precepts. You always run into rules, because life is rules. And if you don't pay attention to the rules, you have problems. And some of the problems are imposed on us, and some of the problems are karma. We try to pay attention to the rules.

[31:47]

What are the rules? Stay out of trouble. So either way you go, there's going to be rules. If you follow the precepts, then you have those rules. If you don't follow the precepts, you have other rules, but you can get into trouble with them. Either way, you'll have some precepts. The extended practice of zazen. So precepts are the extended practice of zazen. And Tsukiroshi, when he describes what is genjo koan, he says, genjo koan is your everyday practice as it is extended from zazen. The meaning of genjo koan is your everyday activity as it is extended from zazen. So that's precepts. Precepts are not just some special rules, but it's just your very life. Every moment is precepts.

[32:48]

How you do something. So those 10 precepts are just kind of a guideline, you know, that represents something. But the actual precept comes from your behavior and how you respond to life. That's genjo koan, how we practice genjo koan. So before you are familiar with our way, you should depend on your teacher. This is the best way, and therefore we have the prohibitory precepts, the negative ten precepts. When you become familiar with our way, I think what he means is when you become mature in our way, you will have a more positive observation of the precepts. In other words, he's saying, he's being kind, he's saying, at first, you know, you depend on the teacher and you depend on the written precepts and so forth, but when your practice becomes mature, then your practice is your own.

[33:55]

And the positive precepts come from within you. They're not something imposed on you. That's when you have maturity So So then he says, how the teacher points out the student's mistake is very important, because when the teacher doesn't understand how to do this, that's his mistake. Now he's talking about teacher, not criticizing, but showing how teachers should be careful. If a teacher thinks that what his student did is a mistake, that person's not a teacher. It is a mistake, maybe. It is a mistake. But on the other hand, what the student does is an expression of the student's true nature.

[34:58]

So the teacher has to point out the student's mistake, but not to violate the student's nature. That's the important point. How do you point out something without violating the student's nature? Because the student's mistake is the student's nature. We think the mistake is bad and the not-mistake is good. But it's not a matter of good or bad. Because when you're a student and you do something, you make a mistake, it's something that you feel, right? And what you feel is your nature. So be careful with people's feelings. Sometimes, you know, he talks about, you know, how to be very careful and gentle, blah, blah, blah, blah. But he also realizes that sometimes you just have to slap somebody.

[36:04]

Anyway, when we understand this, we will have respect for our students' true nature and be careful how we point out mistakes. That's very true. He talks about the various ways that a teacher should act. He says, in the scriptures, five points are made about how to be careful. One is that the teacher has to choose the opportunity and not point out the student's mistake in front of many people. So that's embarrassing. And I've done that before. And that's not very kind of me. And I apologize for that. If possible, the teacher points out the mistake personally in an appropriate time and place. So, you know, you do that so that when other people are not around. Secondly, the teacher is reminded to be truthful, which means the teacher does not point out the disciple's mistake just because thinking it, just because it's a mistake.

[37:16]

The teacher should understand why the disciple did so, and then that can be, and it can be truthful. So you have to, it's not just you did this, but understand, well, why did this happen? some circumspection, you know, not just correction, but why did this happen? When you understand why it happened, then you have a better way to approach how to deal with saying something. The fourth one is that the teacher gives advice or points out the disciple's mistake solely for the sake of helping the person, not just to get something off of his or her chest. Here the teacher should be very careful because noticing that the student is making some excuse for what she did, or that the student is not serious enough, then the teacher should not listen to her. Just ignore her, I guess.

[38:20]

The teacher should ignore him until she becomes more serious. What does that have to do with the rule you just read? Because it's not a rule. The guideline. It's just an approach of the rule. The guideline, as you said, was that the teacher should not say something solely to get it off his or her chest. And I don't understand how the commentary follows from that. Oh, I didn't make a commentary. But he did. Not just to get something off his chest. Here the teacher should be careful because noticing that the student is making some excuse for what he or she did or that not serious enough. But the teacher should not listen to him or her. Teacher should ignore it because... That's when the student is defensive and you don't get angry.

[39:28]

you don't respond in a defensive way. You'll get your intellectual rebuttal. So the teacher should ignore the person until she becomes more serious. But, and the but is mine, even though we give advice only for the sake of helping the student, this does not mean to always be easy with the student. Sometimes we should be very tough with the student, or we cannot help in a true sense. Sometimes to help the student we give some instructions. And sometimes we give some instructions. So there are different ways. You know, what is compassion? Compassion has many different characteristics. So sometimes we think compassion is just to be sweet, but that's not compassion necessarily.

[40:32]

If the person needs sweetness and lots of support, then that's the compassion we give. If the person needs to be toned down some way, and is very resistant, and needs something stronger, that's the compassion. So compassion means being helpful. So many ways to be helpful. So the last point, the last one is to point out the student's mistake with compassion, which means that the teacher is not just the teacher, but also the disciple's friend. As a friend, the teacher points out some problem or gives some advice. So the point is to connect with the person, the teacher to connect with the person so that you're not talking at somebody, but you're talking with somebody.

[41:42]

That's a big difference. The thing that offends most people or drives them into a corner is when you're talking at them and you're objectifying the person. But to talk, identify with and be with that person, that's true compassion. To understand that what you're saying has what the effect on the person is. that you're the effect that you're having on this person so that as you may be criticizing in a sense but you're also feeling that what that person is feeling and identifying with that so that it's not just you're not free of that you also are compassion means to suffer with basically. So you're feeling the same feeling of the person that you're criticizing or the person that you're giving this whatever it is to.

[43:00]

So it doesn't exempt you. But then he says, so it's not easy to be a teacher or to be a student. And we cannot rely on anything, even the precepts. We have to make our utmost effort to help each other. And we do not observe our precepts just for the sake of precepts or practice rituals just for the perfection of rituals. We are studying how to express our true nature. I also I have to say that we talk a lot about what the teacher's role is and how the teacher should be, but there's also how the student should be. How do you be a student?

[44:06]

We expect so much of the teacher, but what do we expect of the student? In America, you know, we don't, we kind of are very loose, you know. I always call my parents by their titles, mom and dad, but often people these days call their parents by their names. which is very nice and personal, but there's some... People like to remove the hierarchical barrier, but there's a lot of... something's lost there. I remember Kadagiri Roshi saying,

[45:08]

to his students, he said, you people just do not know how to treat a teacher in America. What do we expect from a student? What kind of behavior do we expect from a student? I would think that we would expect the same behavior from a student as a student expects from the teacher. I think that's enough. And I think if we keep that in mind, that we have a good relationship. and everyone has their position, but it's not a problem. So, often, you know, when I am talking to students, I feel that in some ways, they're practicing in some ways better than I do.

[46:35]

And so they're actually a good example for me. So I appreciate, you know, when students really show an example, a good example of practice. It encourages me. So, you know, we don't need to put the teacher on the pedestal, but the teacher has to there's an obligation to do their best. As the Sangha grows, there are more and more practice leaders and teachers. emerging.

[47:46]

And then when you have a small Sangha with a number of teachers and practice leaders, then it can present problems, but it can also be very good. So, on the one hand, sometimes a person will come and they'll come to the teacher and they don't like what they receive. So they go to the other one. And it's kind of like playing off mommy against daddy, you know. So, but that's okay. We can accept that. But it presents some kind of, it could present a difficulty, except that If mommy and daddy see the same way, then it's helpful for the student.

[48:48]

But maybe they don't, you know. So, it seems, you know, you go to someone who treats you nicely. That may not be your best teacher. Because this one didn't treat me so nicely. I go to this one, who treats me more nicely. So, That's okay, as long as it's not a problem for you. But, you know, for me, the difficult teachers are always the best ones. The person who gives you a hard time, you may not think that they're your teacher, but usually they are. So, I remember Suzuki Roshi saying, I didn't know who my real teacher was until much later in my life. But it was the one that gave me the hard time. And I remember Tatsugami Roshi, who was my teacher at Tassajara when I was shuso, he gave the monks a hard time at Eheji.

[50:04]

A really hard time. But when he left, they all cried. So, you know, when somebody touches that delicate point in us that we don't like to reveal or don't like to deal with, it's natural to kind of run away. So, it's good to, if you can, to not do that. So anyway, as he said, it's tricky business being teacher and student.

[50:53]

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