I have longed to taste the sweetness of the darkest of the worsts. So today we come to the conclusion of Ginjo Koan, or rather to the end, or to the last part. So I'm going to read a little bit into it.

[01:10]

so that it won't be just isolated from the rest. Here is the place and here the way unfolds. The boundary of realization is not distinct. The realization comes forth simultaneously with the mastery of Buddhadharma. Do not suppose that what you realize becomes your knowledge and is grasped by your consciousness. Although actualized immediately, the inconceivable may not be apparent. Its appearance is beyond your knowledge." Zen Master Bao Che of Mount Mayu was fanning himself. A monk approached and said, Master, the nature of the wind is permanent and there is no place it does not reach. Why then do you fan yourself? Although you understand that the nature of wind is permanent, Bao Che replied, You do not understand the meaning of its reaching everywhere. What is the meaning of its reaching everywhere?

[02:15]

asked the monk. Again, asked the monk again. The master just kept fanning himself. The monk bowed deeply. The actualization of the Buddhadharma, the vital path of its correct transmission, is like this. If you say that you do not need to fan yourself because the nature of wind is permanent, and you can have wind without fanning, you will understand neither permanence nor the nature of wind. The nature of wind is permanent. Because of that, the wind of the Buddha's house brings forth the gold of the earth and makes fragrant the cream of the long river. So Zen Master Bao Che, it was one hot summer day, and the flies were buzzing around and sweat was pouring out, fanning himself, making some wind.

[03:39]

And the monk approached and said, the nature of wind is permanent and reaches everywhere. How come you're fanning yourself? Of course, wind means buddha nature. It also means emptiness. So the monk's question is something like, if everything is buddha nature and all dharmas Why do you need to fan yourself? Why do you need to practice in order to bring forth realization? Why do you have to do anything about it? That's a logical question. And Priest Baoche says, although you understand that the nature of wind is permanent, you don't understand the meaning of its reaching everywhere.

[04:49]

Suzuki Roshi says, this is just a kind of compliment to the monk. He says, actually, the monk didn't understand anything about anything. I don't know if that's so. So the question here is, if everyone or everything is Buddha nature, why do we have to do anything about it, or why practice? What's the purpose of practice?" is maybe the distillation of this question. And Priest Bhakche just picked up his fan and fanned himself, because he felt this was the best response. So, according to history, or according to Dogen's legend, Dogen, this was Dogen's big question.

[06:05]

He studied as a monk, since he started studying, he became a monk when he was 13, and went to Mount Hiei, which was at that time the seat of Tendai School of Buddhism, and was the center of Buddhist study in Japan, in Kyoto. And that's where all of the, most of the monks went to study who were serious. Tendai teaching, of course, encompasses the whole of Buddhist teaching. It's maybe the eclectic school of Buddhism. If you want to find out something about Buddhism, then you study Tendai through the Tendai school.

[07:09]

And all the meditation practices of Buddhism are somehow touched upon by Tendai. Tiantai in China. Sardogin started studying there when he was 13, but he left because he was dissatisfied. Somehow he felt that he needed something more. But what he learned on Mount Hiei was that all beings are the Buddha nature, have Buddha nature. This comes from the Mahaparinirvana Sutra. It's interesting about how things are developed in Buddhism.

[08:14]

there was always this question, are there some beings that don't have buddha nature? Do all sentient beings have buddha nature or are there some sentient beings that don't have buddha nature? And this was a question in Buddhism. And then they discovered this passage in the Maha Parinirvana Sutra that said, all beings without question have buddhanature. And Dogen turned that around later to all beings are buddhanature. Have buddhanature is still a kind of dualistic expression. To have or have not is a dualistic expression. So he changed that to all beings are buddhanature. There's no difference between beings and buddhanature. So this question, since all beings have buddha nature, or are buddha nature, why does one have to practice?

[09:33]

Why does one have to look for it? What's the search for enlightenment? So that brought Dogen, that became Dogen's, seems to have become Dogen's koan, or question. And with that kind of quest, he went to China. And he relates the story of when he came to China, he stayed on the boat for a while after the boat docked in China. And his teacher, Myosin, went to search around for some teacher, some monastery. Of course, Dogen went to study with Miaozhen, who was... Well, I don't want to go through all the history of Zen, but... And Dogen was looking for a teacher in China.

[10:47]

And eventually, he found Tendo Nyojo. But before that, he met a cook from one of the monasteries. And he was rather impressed with this cook. Something about the cook impressed him. And the cook came on the ship to sell mushrooms. There are two parts to this story. I'll put both of the parts together to make one story out of it. What impressed him about this cook is that the cook was not so concerned about studying Buddhism, but after talking to the cook, he wanted the cook to stay with him for a while because he felt something deep about him.

[11:52]

But the cook said, no, he said, I can't stay because I have to get back to the monastery and cook. And the monastery was like a day's journey by foot away. And he said, well, isn't there some cook in the monastery that can, some younger cook that can take your place while you're here? And he said, no. He said, there are such people. But my position is to be the cook. So even though I'd like to be here, I have to fulfill my position as cook in the monastery. And he left. And Dogen is very impressed about that. He learned something from this cook about how to fan, how to fan himself.

[12:58]

Rick said, if I don't take care of my, what I have to take care of, then I will not only be not taking care of the monks, that I won't be fulfilling myself. In other words, even though I have Buddha nature, if I don't do my activity, it doesn't manifest, it doesn't become apparent.

[14:27]

doesn't appear as buddha nature. It doesn't fulfill itself. So Dogen was deeply impressed by this monk's understanding and it was a whole new way of thinking for him. And Dogen was the kind of person who was so sensitive that when he encountered a situation, he was enlightened by that situation. It didn't take much. So the point here is even though all beings have buddha nature, all beings are buddha nature, if buddha nature is not practiced, it doesn't manifest.

[16:02]

If there's no activity, correct activity to stimulate the nature, it doesn't manifest. So stimulating the nature is called practice. Practice realization. Realization is the nature. Buddha nature is realization, and stimulation is practice, or practice is stimulation, to stir the pot, to poke something and make it move. And when it moves, then it becomes apparent.

[17:14]

But even though it's there, it doesn't manifest unless it's stimulated. It's like, Dogen describes it in a classical called Zenki, total dynamic working. when he says, there's the boat, and the sail, and the tiller. And when the person steps into the boat, takes the tiller, raises the sail, takes the tiller, and starts to move, then the boat, the man becomes the boat, and the boat becomes the man. and life manifests. Life comes to life.

[18:22]

The boat looks like a boat, but until we step into the boat and hoist the sail and take the tiller, it's not really a boat. It's only a boat when it acts like a boat. So there's boat, and water, and sky, and wind. But there has to be boat, water, sky, wind, and person. Then the boat is complete. Then it's a real boat. Because a boat is not a boat unless it functions as a boat. even though the boat is floating in the water, you can look at the boat and say, oh, there's a boat. But the boat doesn't fulfill itself as a boat until the person steps aboard, hoists the sail, and takes the tiller.

[19:38]

Then the boat becomes a boat, and a person becomes a person, and the person becomes a boat, and the boat becomes a person. So boat is manifesting boat, and person is manifesting person. Buddha nature is complete. We can walk into the kitchen, and there are the pots, the pans, and the food.

[20:49]

And we say, oh, these are pots and pans and food. But when we pick up the knife and cut the onion, life comes to life. So even though buddhanature is everywhere, enlightenment is everywhere, until we meet life or stimulate buddhanature doesn't really manifest. But each moment

[22:02]

has its own position. As Dogen says, firewood is firewood and ash is ash. Firewood does not become ash. Firewood is firewood and has its own history. Ash has its own history. The moments are not linked up. So we do this moment's activity, and then this moment's activity, and then this moment's activity. This is called shikantaza, or just doing.

[23:04]

And this is also called bringing forth nature, letting Buddha nature come forth. just doing. It's also called jijuyu zamar, or self-joyous self-joyous, self-fulfilling nature, the samadhi of being one with each moment. So when we talk about concentration, concentration is important.

[24:11]

We should realize concentration is just one factor that concentration means. to be centered in each moment's activity as this moment. If we are centered in this moment's activity as this moment, then the next moment will take care of itself. I don't mean we shouldn't think ahead. but the next moment will take care of itself. Each moment, when each moment takes care of itself, then every moment is a surprise, a joyous surprise, even if there's some disappointment.

[25:17]

reach to the bottom of each moment, whether there's something pleasant happening or something unpleasant happening. Pleasant or unpleasant is not the point. The point is to always be centered in true mind, fundamental mind. Then good and bad, Good things and bad things come and go, but we never lose the center. Confucius talked about, in one of the Analects of Confucius, He talks about the unwobbling pivot.

[26:37]

He says the unwobbling pivot is always fixed. Fixed, not fixed as a point, but never is pushed off its place. It's always, things move around it, but it never moves. It's not moved by anything. And it responds to situations, but always is complete within itself. our Zen practice.

[27:44]

In our Zen practice, if nothing else, we should find this unwavering pivot that's not pushed around by good and bad and like and dislike. You really have to find that place. That's our true zazen, is to find that place and to be that person. When something tragic happens, we should cry. And then we should have a good cry. And then we should wipe our tears and move on.

[28:49]

Collect yourself and move on. To find your center and to be one with your nature doesn't mean not to feel anything. But beyond feelings, you know how to establish yourself moment by moment, responding to feelings. When it's time to laugh, really laugh. When it's time to cry, really cry. But to know how to let go, collect yourself and go on. Little children, one moment they're laughing, the next moment they're crying.

[29:58]

One moment it looks like their life is just a complete shambles and in the turning of the body there's a smile. Originally, we have this, but as we get older, we become lost. We get lost in the winds of life and lose our unwavering we lose our center and drift around in a sea of feelings, thoughts, emotion. And at some point we get washed up on the shore and start looking for ourself.

[31:10]

Our everyday practice, whether we're walking, standing, working, sitting, studying, talking, arguing, feeling offended, feeling lost, whatever we're doing, We should always make the effort to be centered. If you don't lose, the one thing that you should not lose is the effort to be centered, no matter what's going on. That's really our work. How do you remain centered? Well, first you remain centered in the body.

[32:48]

When we make our movements, our movements come from the center of our body. Then our mind is centered in the body. This is zazen. Zazen is to center the mind in the body. The center of our body is just a little below our navel. When we sit Zazen, our legs are like roots of a tree, rooted in the ground. And the upper part is like the trunk of the tree. And the crown is where the roots and the trunk meet. at the ground level. And that crown is the center. And if we move, always move from that center.

[34:03]

Whatever you're doing, to have awareness of that center. No matter what you're doing, to always have awareness of this center so that when your arms are moving and your legs are moving and your body is moving, it's moving around this center. And then when you sit in zazen, zazen is centered right here. Breath. The rising and falling of your abdomen is your breath. attention is centered right here. So you're always balanced and you always know where to come back to. when we're centered here, then all the parts of our body and mind take their right places around the center.

[35:28]

If you center yourself in your shoulders, then your whole body and mind become unbalanced. If you center yourself in the head, then your whole body and mind become unbalanced. You become top-heavy. So people that think too much, always mulling things over, become top-heavy. Someone may have a very brilliant mind, which is always moving very quickly and confusedly, but it's top-heavy. To stop thinking doesn't mean to stop the activity of the mind, but it means to center the mind in the body so that the mind will think in balance with the whole being.

[36:42]

If you look at our human race, which it's getting to be faster and faster. The mind is out of sync with the rest of the race. It's out of sync with the rest of the, with the whole body. And so we all, everybody's suffering. Because the mind is racing far ahead of the body. The collective mind is racing far ahead of the body. If nothing else, our practice of zazen helps to hold it down. This is our response.

[37:51]

to the way things go. The world, humanity is ready to blow itself up because it can't help it. People can't stop the mind, which is out of balance with the body. So all of the responses are unbalanced. And when our mind is not centered in our body, our responses are unbalanced. And we have a really hard time. And we're either angry or resentful. is not able to make the right responses.

[38:55]

So, if we're centered in our center, then all the parts of our body and mind take their balanced place around that center. and work together harmoniously. So it comes back again to our own practice of each one of us. And when we can work harmoniously with ourselves, then we can work harmoniously with each other. The monk approached and said, the nature of wind is permanent and there is no place it does not reach.

[40:12]

The wind is like a Buddha nature. And the fan is like a Buddha nature. The wind is like emptiness, and the fan is like form. And emptiness is like, below the line, this is emptiness. And above the line, this is form. All forms. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. One of the Tenzo's comments to Dogen was, you don't understand characters. Dogen says, well, what are characters? He says, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10. Dogen was looking for Buddha nature in emptiness.

[41:32]

He didn't understand that if you want to find your Buddha nature, you have to find it in form. If you want to find emptiness, you have to find it through form. Form is emptiness. Emptiness is form. Emptiness finds its expression in forms. So if you want to find what emptiness is, you have to pay attention to form, because form is emptiness, and emptiness is the very form. So, really paying attention to form is paying attention to our nature.

[42:38]

Each one of us in this monastery has a position, and our position takes a certain form. If we look somewhere else for our nature, we'll look forever. without finding it, but if you just pay attention to the form, there it is. One of the difficulties, you know, of this kind of practice is it's easy to get into a kind of mode of production or producing or, you know, to make things work.

[43:58]

we want to make things work, and they should work. But if we're too worried about making everything work just right, then we lose the sense of what we're doing, actually. If we try to become too expert, I talked about this yesterday, too expert or too good at something, then in our effort to try to be too perfect, too good, we lose the actual essence of our practice. Suzuki Roshi, when he was talking about a beginner's mind, he said in the expert's mind there are few opportunities, but in a beginner's mind everything is open.

[45:22]

So the whole point is to maintain beginner's mind. So even though you may be very good at some tasks, the thing that may block your way is that you're always good at giving advice. How to be an expert and hold your tongue. When we become very good at something, then our ego starts to inflate. So inflated ego is the stopper for a beginner's mind. You can't help doing something well.

[46:37]

That's good. But if we get onto the wagon of perfection, we lose the vehicle of beginner's mind. So in beginner's mind, we should always have humility. and not put ourselves first. The thing about becoming an expert is we start to put ourselves first. And as you become more and more proficient and better and better at doing something, you should be good at stepping back rather than stepping forward. The way to rise to the top, the way to rise to the top is to keep stepping back.

[47:44]

If you want to go forward, you just keep going further back. So the point is to always have an open mind. open-minded beginner's mind. People will recognize that. You don't have to tell people how good you are. You don't have to say, I want to do something. If you say, I really need to do something, what you bring up in people is resistance. It's just natural. If you just work hard at refining your nature, which is called beginner's mind, everyone will recognize your talent, which is the ability to let go.

[48:58]

And they'll say, please lead us. So when we're centered, centered, as I said, emptiness, this is a kind of picture, right? Emptiness is here, form is here. Well, emptiness is zero. It's like an equation, right? This is the line, and this is zero below the line, and this is one. your model in various ways.

[50:00]

You can also have a big circle and say this is zero degrees, and go around the circle with the various mathematics until you come full circle again. But anyway, circle is here. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 is activity of of emptiness. And we are always right here on the line. And when we're really centered, always centered, then form and emptiness is balanced. complete, and buddhi-nature manifests all by itself.

[51:05]

It's always manifesting, but in order to be centered in our true self, we have to make And we respond to circumstances without attachment. And circumstances respond to us without attachment. Something comes and something goes. If something comes, okay, thank you very much. Whatever comes, we have to be able to say, thank you very much, whatever it is.

[52:09]

Then, after it comes, we can do something about it. We can keep it for a while and let it go. But whatever it is that comes, it's something for us to work with. Something comes for a moment, something else comes for our whole life. But whatever it is, we can appreciate it. Because what we're appreciating is our life, not necessarily something that we like or dislike. When we're centered in the center of life, then we can appreciate whatever comes.

[53:28]

then our responses are not so mean. And when someone insults us, we can say, thank you very much. Because we're not centered in the insult. We're centered in ourself. But when you get centered in the insult, then you get pulled out of your place. You get pulled off your center. It's really easy. Where do you live? But when we do get pulled off, we should know where to come back to.

[54:43]

Sometimes we get pulled off for a moment. Sometimes we get pulled off for an hour. Sometimes we get pulled off for all day. Sometimes we get pulled off for three months. Sometimes we never do get back. But as you know, zazen is to keep coming back. This is what zazen is. You keep wandering off, and you keep coming back. The mind wanders, and you pull it back. You just keep coming back to yourself. That's all there is to it. until you become less and less bothered by things.

[55:58]

We respond to circumstances, and we take care of responsibilities, and we have feelings, thoughts, emotions, but being centered in reality is the most important thing. If it's not, okay, go ahead and be bothered. Go ahead and get upset. Let life upset you.

[56:43]

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