Good morning. I think for some of us, or a number of us, many of us, that the difficulty that we have is not so much The actual activity is not so difficult, but what's difficult is our apprehension, our anticipation and our fear. I think this is what makes for the most difficulty for many of us. Anticipation is waiting for something that you think will happen, even though you have some idea about what that is, and you may or may not know what it is.

[01:20]

Fear is not wanting something. that you think will happen. And apprehension is sort of in between the two. Apprehension is like anticipation with a little fear thrown in. I think these are bigger hindrances than the actual difficulty you have in zazen for many people, not for everyone. And I think that we all experience some of this to one degree or another. And not just in zazen, but in our practice. What am I doing?

[02:26]

What is this leading to? What will happen next? I'm getting older. What will happen to me? Is this the right thing to do? Should I have gone to college instead? Should I have a career? That's the movement in the broader sense. In the narrow sense of sasheen, it's... Can I continue? Will this pain get worse? What will happen in this city? what will happen tomorrow. So this kind of thinking can cause us a big problem because it's like a balloon.

[03:34]

You keep blowing air into the balloon and it keeps getting bigger and bigger, but it's nothing but air. It's a big object. And we carry this big object around with us. But it's nothing but gas. Or air. But it takes up a lot of space. So... in zazen, in zazhin, just to be able to let go of our attachment to our thinking is something that we have to really work with. And our thinking mind can be very tenacious, maybe like a bulldog who's caught you by the leg, and you try and shake him off, but you can't do it,

[04:46]

But you know, my experience with dogs is that the more you try to shake them off, the more tenacious they get. And if you just show them some kindness, they're very sweet. Dogs have a very sweet nature. I've never yet found a dog that I couldn't calm down So, you know, seshin is like unifying mind, unifying body and mind. Taking into consideration all the aspects of our consciousness, of our body and consciousness, and unifying them to one purpose, to one act, one activity.

[05:55]

This is what we do. So, how do we get those parts of us that are giving us some difficulty and get them to participate? The reluctant mind. The fearful mind. The apprehensive mind. How can we bring them along? First we have to recognize them and then include them in our big mind. The same way we include all of our feelings and thoughts So we focus on the problem is discrimination, discriminating mind.

[07:16]

Discriminating mind is the mind that separates, says, I don't want. I want and I don't want. I want this, but I don't want that. In this bag, everything that is here is here. So, how do we include it all? So, there's a nice little koan here. It doesn't have an introduction. So this is my introduction. This is case number 80 in the booklet record called Joshu's Newborn Baby. A monk asked Joshu, does a newborn baby also have the sixth consciousness?

[08:28]

And Joshu said, like tossing a ball in swiftly flowing water, That was his answer. He doesn't explain it, but he said, it's just like tossing a ball in swiftly flowing water. And later, the monk asked another teacher, he said, what did Joshu mean when he said, like throwing a ball in swiftly flowing water? And the teacher said, moment by moment, nonstop flow. moment by moment, non-stop flow. These two responses both fit together quite nicely to make up this call. We talked about the eight levels of consciousness and the sixth consciousness

[09:36]

being the consciousness which discriminates between the senses and is called thinking mind, and is a discriminating consciousness, just like the seventh consciousness is discriminating in a sense of ego forming. the sixth consciousness is discriminating in the sense of, I see this, I see that, and I hear this, and I hear that, and makes decisions and judgments based on seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting, and touching, and feeling. So, this monk knew about the eight levels of consciousness.

[10:41]

So he wanted to test his understanding with Joshu. So he just tossed out this question. He says, does the baby have the sixth consciousness? Joshu said, it's like tossing a ball on a swiftly flowing river. We talked about this, I think, before. Baby, of course, has discriminating consciousness, but it's not developed. But as we get older, discriminating consciousness becomes more and more developed, and pretty soon takes over our whole mind. And there's nothing but discrimination. Our whole pure mind, our baby mind, is cut up into small pieces.

[11:49]

And in each piece, there's yes and no and maybe. Like and dislike. Wanting, not wanting. Good and bad, right and wrong. And so we become born into the world of delusion. So when we come back When we get deluded enough, we start sitting zazen. Delusion leads to zazen.

[12:52]

The great delusion. Sometimes zazen is called sitting in delusion. Matter of fact. It's what it is. Sitting in delusion. Sitting and allowing delusion to just pass through. like a bouncing ball on a fast-flowing stream. Delusion is not necessarily bad, it's just the other side of our life. It's just the discriminating side of our life, not for the better. but it obscures the reality of our life.

[13:53]

The whole unified side of our life is obscured by a discriminating mind. So when we sit in zazen, we resume our unified mind, our unity with the host as the host. The guest sits in the lap of the host. And we just let the stream flow by. If we just let the stream flow by, the stream of thoughts, feelings, perceptions, mental formations, and consciousness. No problem. Our host mind just gets bigger and bigger and accepts it all.

[15:06]

But what we do is grab onto pieces. As soon as something comes up, we grab onto it. This is the mind that's always attaching to something. If pain comes up, our mind immediately latches onto it with apprehension. Uh-oh, there it comes again. If we don't attached to it, or latch on to it, it's just something coming up. Just another feeling. As soon as we start naming, then we start forming a concept. And once we've formed a concept, we give it some definition.

[16:18]

And then we decide whether we like it or not. and whether we want it or not. So, Zazen or Cixin is a great, it's like the mind in Cixin is like a great torrent with all kinds of flotsam and jetsam bumping up against everything. So, we say, just stop thinking. Stop the action of the sixth consciousness. Stop discriminating. Just let everything be as it is.

[17:23]

As soon as something comes up, don't name it. You know, there is a practice of naming. It's become very popular in meditation circles, which I won't say is good or bad, but for us, just don't name. If something comes up, just leave it out as a question. What is it? Oh, what is this? not, oh, I know what this is. Leave your mind open to the question, what is this? Not knowing is the highest kind of wisdom. Maybe a good koan for zazen. It doesn't interfere with anything.

[18:26]

Just, what is this? What is this? Not, oh, this is pain. Oh, how long will I have to sit here? There's a poem from another koan, and the poem says, an ancient said, day and night, all of you people release a great light from the gates of your six senses.

[19:43]

It shines through mountains, rivers, and the great earth. It's not only your eyes that release light, nose, tongue, body, and mind also all release light. To get here, you simply must clean up your six sense faculties so that you're without the slightest concern, purified and naked, free and unbound. Only then will you see where this story is at. It's a nice poem. Just clean up your six senses. Just leave everything open and naked. You know, in present day health circles, we talk about the clogged arteries of our body. We eat so many fats, and we eat so many things that clog our body up, but we don't talk so much about the stuff that clogs our mind up.

[20:51]

Mind is the same thing. six senses all clogged up. Satsang, or Satsang, is the purification process which allows us to unclog the channels of consciousness Seeing sees. Seeing just sees. If I say, I see. If I say, I say. There I am. I'm saying, I say. That's just a kind of convenience. This person says. Seeing just sees.

[21:54]

just hears. Feeling just feels. Smelling just smells and tasting just tastes. And thinking just thinks. This is our position in Cixin. We look at the wall, but Seeing just sees the wall, or seeing just sees what's in front of sight. Sometimes when you're looking at the wall, sometimes you see it and sometimes you don't, even though your eyes are open. Sometimes you hear something and sometimes you don't, even though your ears are open.

[22:58]

So when the mind is moving, even though eyes are open, they don't see. And even though ears are open, when the mind is moving, hearing doesn't hear. And feeling doesn't feel. There is painfulness in zazen, which is a very real feeling. But in zazen, because of the narrowness of our concentration, everything becomes magnified.

[24:13]

So a small thing will become a very big thing. and then becomes the only thing. In zazen, it's important not to focus on one thing too much. Our mind will tend to gravitate toward the strongest thing and then latch onto it, focus on it. That's why it's important to know where our focus should be. Focus is on posture and on breathing. So when our focus is on posture and breathing, when we have some difficulty, we don't get lost in the difficulty.

[25:21]

because we always know where our focus is. And if we have a strong focus on posture and a strong focus on our breath, then the mind stays there. Even though it tends to get pulled off, it comes back. Even though we want to indulge in self-pity, Or maybe that's too strong. But even though we get pulled off by our thinking and our feelings, our intention is strong enough to maintain our focus. And we can include everything that happens to us because

[26:25]

we don't get pulled off by it. Our mind grows bigger and bigger to include everything rather than narrower and narrower to only be obsessed by one aspect. So in a way we go against our natural tendency The natural tendency is when something we don't like enters into the picture, that we really grab onto it and try to eliminate it. But here, when something we don't like enters the picture, we just open up to include it. So you're going the other way.

[27:26]

And mind and body get bigger and bigger with no boundary or limit. And the action of the tenacity of discriminating mind loses its grip. In the process of discrimination, the thinking mind and feelings appear and disappear, appear at one moment and are gone in the next. And the mind is open and ready for the next moment, for this moment's appearance. So, non-discriminating mind is the mind that's just open to this moment, to the activity of this moment, moment after moment after moment, without apprehension, without anticipation, and without fear.

[28:57]

without any expectation, even though you feel you know what's coming next. But actually you don't. We don't know what's next. So this is the mind of not knowing, not knowing, just completely open and not knowing. The baby's mind. But it's not the mind of the baby. It's the mind of maturity. In the baby, it's the baby's mind. In the mind of an adept, it's the mind of maturity. It's like the baby's mind, but it's not the baby's mind.

[30:06]

It's childlike, but not childish. Setjo, in his commentary to this koan, has a passage here where he says, He quotes an ancient. An ancient said, my patched garment covering my head, myriad concerns cease. I like that. He says, my patched garment, meaning my robe covering my head, all concerns cease. The feeling is having put everything of concern down.

[31:15]

Having actually given up the world is what it means. Giving up the world doesn't mean not acting in the world. It doesn't mean secluding yourself in a place like Dasara. It means just having given up self-concern no longer concerned with ourself, about ourself. It doesn't mean we don't take care of ourself. It means no longer concerned about ourself. This is like the stage of third rank. And the baby's mind, the third rank is like the baby's mind. When one has completely gone through the transformation of returning to baby mind, the baby's mind, and can start life completely new without

[32:42]

the old, carrying around the burden of a lifetime. This is what Buddhist robe is. Buddhist robe is a symbol of having cut it cut off, the burden of our old life. and starting a life completely new, like a newborn baby, and with not knowing mind, the mind of what is it, the open mind, the mind that doesn't know what it is, but is open to everything. So he says, an ancient said, my patched garment covering my head, myriad concerns cease.

[33:53]

At this time, I don't understand anything at all. Only if you can be like this will you have a small share of attainment. Though an adept is like this, nevertheless, he can't be fooled at all as before. Mountains are mountains and rivers are rivers. He is without artifice and without clinging thoughts. He is like the sun and moon moving through the sky without ever stopping and without saying, I have so many names and forms. He is like the sky everywhere covering, like the earth everywhere supporting. Since they have no mind, they bring up and nurture myriad beings without saying, I have so many accomplishments. Since sky and earth are mindless, they last forever. What has mind has limits. A person who has attained the path is like this too. In the midst of no activity, one carries out one's activities, accepting all unfavorable and favorable circumstances with a compassionate heart."

[34:59]

This state of mind, I don't like to say state of mind because zazen or Zen mind is no special state of mind. but it's also called wu-wei, means no activity, which doesn't mean there are no thoughts, just no activity, no clinging activity, no I do, just something is done. no action, the action of no action. Everything comes and goes, and yet it's only within all activity, everything is still.

[36:10]

It's like looking at a river, and a river or a stream, you know, when you get pretty far back, it's just has a shape and is standing still. But when you get up to it, it loses its shape and it's just a rushing torrent. Then there's the poem, Setjo's poem. He says, the sixth consciousness inactive, he puts forth a question. Another translation, sixth consciousness purposeless, he puts forth a question.

[37:12]

And then Engo has a little commentary. He says, though he has eyes, he is like a blind man. Though he has ears, he is like a dead man, deaf man. The bright mirror is in its stand, and the bright pearl is in the palm of the hand. In one line, Shui Tu has said it all. Sixth consciousness inactive, he puts forth a question. The adepts have both discerned where he's coming from. On the boundless, swift-flowing water tossing a ball, where it comes down, it doesn't stay. Who can watch it? So, you know, zazen is a purposeless activity. Sashi is one great purposeless act lasting seven days.

[38:21]

This is the most important thing, state of mind, is to have this purposeless motive. If you have some purpose in it, it's already tainted. So, just pure activity. Don't mess it up. It's just one long week, or short week, of completely opening yourself more and open. And when difficulties appear, just open wider. The difficulties are like a kind of wedge, you know, that help us to open wider and wider.

[39:39]

And if we continue opening, then nothing can hold us. And we can contain everything. Don't think, this is my limit, or this is my boundary. There's no limit, no boundary. Just let everything come and go on your baby mind.

[40:22]

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