When I first came to practice with my teacher, Suzuki Roshi, he described our practice as what we call Shikantaza. Shikantaza is a term that was used by Dogen Zenji. Dogen Zenji also used other terms, like Jinjuyu Zamae. Zamae is Japanese for samadhi. So today I want to talk about samadhi. And I'm kind of inventing this talk as I go along.

[01:01]

I was wondering what I was going to talk about. And as I often do, I'm still in the middle of it, of thinking what I'm going to talk about and how I'm going to talk about it. But I think you'll find it interesting. So I want to talk about what is the meaning of samadhi and what is shikantaza, and what is jinjuyu samadhi, what is komyozo samadhi, what is king samadhi. There are many names for one thing, but each name expresses it in a different way according to how we want to understand it. So Suzuki Roshi emphasized shikantaza

[02:05]

as just this. Just this. And you can take away the this and it's just just. Or you can take away the just and it's this. So what is this? This narrows our life down to this. Shikantaza narrows our life down to just this. So we are not used to living our life in that way. We're used to living our life running to something significant. And then we move around.

[03:09]

We want to find something significant in our life. So we follow various trails. And we're looking, looking, and then we find something significant. And we say, this is wonderful. And then, of course, when you find something wonderful, you have to find something else that's wonderful because the thing you found that was wonderful is no longer wonderful. So then we look for something else wonderful and significant. We get caught by looking for significant events. The whole world is caught looking for significant events. Either good or bad. If we can't find a good significant event, we'll make a bad one. It's true. So shikantaza is finding this moment to be the most significant event.

[04:10]

And then this moment, the most significant event, no matter what it is, has nothing to do with good or bad or right or wrong or like or dislike. So we're turned around by right and wrong, good and bad, like and dislike, want not want. Shikantaza is finding the true significance of this moment without depending on good and bad, right and wrong, like and dislike. So this is the essence of what we call zazen. The reason why we say zazen is to experience the truth of this moment. How this moment is in all of its perfection and imperfection.

[05:19]

Perfection does not exist without imperfection. When a student sews a robe and brings it to the teacher, the teacher looks at it and says, this is perfect. And then he puts a mark on it and says, now it's real. When there's a Jewish wedding, the couple is married, and everybody says, it's perfect. Then they put down a glass and step on it, crunch. Now it's real, but still perfect. That doesn't make it imperfect, it makes it real. So what is the reality of this moment without anything, without what we call emotion thought.

[06:25]

Emotion thought is a kind of technical term in Zen, which means something like seeing things as they're not. That's the term that Kanzen used, translated to Prajnaparamita Sutra. He said, seeing things as they're not, which is how we see things mostly. So there's nothing wrong with emotion or thinking, but this term emotion thought applies to seeing things in a distorted way, according to the way our feelings are distorted. So Shikantaza is usually applied to Zazen. Zazen is called Shikantaza, just sitting in the moment,

[07:29]

experiencing this moment without any idea of the future or the past. So this moment is both momentary and eternal. Sitting in this moment, in this eternal moment, which is always now. Now is always now. And experience is always changing. Our experience of now is always changing. So now is both still and moving. And the intersection of stillness and movement is Shikantaza.

[08:31]

So there are other names. Dogen also called this Shikantaza, he called it Zamai-o-Zamai. Samadhi, self-fulfilling or self-joy is Samadhi. Called the Samadhi of the Self. Samadhi literally means concentration, but it also actually means stability or evenness or balance. But it means great stability, total stability, rooted in stillness. Our activity, which is rooted in stillness, so that it doesn't get overturned. In Japan they have the Daruma doll, the Bodhidharma doll. It has a round bottom and of course it's very heavy on the bottom.

[09:38]

So you turn it over on its side and it comes back up. It doesn't get turned over. This is stability. When you have a boat, they're flat bottom boats. They don't turn over so easily because they're slow and they're workhorses. But the fast boats have long deep keels. And the keels are very heavy, they have the same weight as the boat. So in a heavy sea the boat doesn't turn over. That's the Samadhi of the boat. So what is our Samadhi? What is our life rooted in that it doesn't turn over, that we don't get turned around by things? Zazen is not simply sitting on a cushion. Samadhi of Zazen is the Samadhi of our daily life, called Shikantara.

[10:45]

Shikantaza. So what is Jinju-yuzamai? Jinju-yuzamai is called the Samadhi of self-joy or self-fulfillment. It means that it's the Samadhi of Zazen, Shikantaza, where we receive Buddhist teaching. Buddha's teaching is revealed to us through Zazen, through the Samadhi. Samadhi is not some special thing. Suzuki Roshi hardly ever used the word Samadhi because for the same reason that Cleary doesn't use the word Samadhi when he translates, because it kind of gives us a mysterious feeling, something mysterious called Samadhi. But actually it's simply great stability, activity based on stillness,

[11:53]

rooted in stillness. So Jinju-yuzamai, Samadhi, is the Samadhi that we receive. Buddha's teaching is not the right word, you know, but it's Buddha's presence which is brought forth in us as we are Buddha and offered to others. So we receive Buddha's teaching and we offer it to others. And in the offering is the fulfillment. That's called Tajuyu-zamai. Jijuyu means receiving, Tajuyu means giving. So we receive and we give. But giving is also not quite right. It's more like we're transmitters, like radio.

[12:59]

We receive and then we give. The transmitter receives the information and it's broadcast. So it's not like we're doing something. Ultimate teaching is not doing anything. It's simply being. It's being who you are. When you are totally immersed in Buddha's world, your world, your true world, then your receiving and giving is just something that happens. Because it has to happen. This is called self-fulfillment. We wonder often why we're not, you know, happy. Even whether we're happy or unhappy, when we have self-fulfillment of receiving and giving, we're always happy anyway.

[13:59]

We have a deep happiness that's not dependent on circumstances, whether things are going well or not going well. It has nothing to do with whether things are going well or not going well. Simply being rooted in stillness is like a deep river of joy, true joyousness. You know, Suzuki Roshi used to say, the Bodhisattva is always the same. How come? And people come and they look at a good Zen student, I mean a successful Zen student, and say, how come you're always the same? When people come here, they come back 20 years later and they say, it's just the same. So, people often feel depleted.

[15:07]

If I keep giving, the more I feel depleted. The problem with that is that it's not true giving. If you feel depleted through giving, there's something wrong. Because giving, generosity, induces energy, not stopping energy. The more you give without holding back, the more energy flows through you. So it's not a matter of I have energy or I don't have energy. It's more like, what am I blocking? Where am I being stingy? The more stingy we are, the more tired we get. When we're totally open and allowing energy to flow through us, through receiving and giving, it's not even something that belongs to me. It's simply letting this world flow through.

[16:10]

So, and connecting with whatever we're dealing with, our surroundings, our people. So the main thing is not how hard you work, but how sincere you are in your practice. I wrote down some notes here. So there's another samadhi that's called Ichijo Zamae. Ichi means one. It means one act samadhi. So it means samadhi from moment to moment.

[17:14]

It means being centered in stillness in each moment's activity. It's the same as Shikantaza, but it's a little bit more focused. Suzuki Ryosuke used to say, Shikantaza is simply living your life a little bit at a time. Totally. It's not very simple. Just one moment at a time. But we don't live our life one moment at a time. Thoroughly. We only live our life as events. And the rest of the time is da-da-da-da-da-da event. Whereas all those little moments of insignificance get lost. So how do we allow each moment to be significant, no matter what it is?

[18:22]

Getting up in the morning, tired, out of sleep, turning off the alarm, brushing your teeth, da-da-da-da-da-da. But all those moments are significant. That's your life. We have to allow our life to be really lived, moment by moment. Instead of trying to make significance out of our life, how to find the significance in what's actually happening. That's why I say washing the dishes is wonderful. It really is, actually. You know. I really don't like the dishwasher. You pull it on, it's got a bump there, you know. And the door goes down the other floor. But you know, if I think this is inconvenient, it's inconvenient. But at the same time, hey, this is my life.

[19:26]

I'm doing this. This is something significant because it's my life. How can we allow this to really experience what's happening right now? And then there's, of course, there's komyozo zamai. Komyo means light. Komyozo means radiant light. Sometimes it's translated as divine light, because it's like the light of Vairajana. In our meal chant, we say homage to the Dharmakaya Vairajana Buddha. Homage to the Sambhogakaya Lokjana Buddha. Homage to the Nirmanakaya Shakyamuni Buddha. These are... And then we name all the bodhisattvas as well.

[20:29]

Homage to the bodhisattvas. So this is a kind of pantheon of buddhas and bodhisattvas, at which Vairajana is the center. And Vairajana is the Buddha of radiant light, or divine light, which is the most significant thing in our life, is expressing light. So... Zazen practice is the practice of expressing light, radiant light, embodying and expressing radiant light, shikantasa. Dharmakaya is the body of Vairajana. We say the Vairajana Dharmakaya Buddha. So in the diagram, Vairajana is in the middle,

[21:29]

and all the buddhas and bodhisattvas are around. But you are Vairajana Buddha. Oh, me? Yes, you are Vairajana Buddha. You have... the light of Vairajana Buddha is what you are. You are nothing but light. But you don't look like light. It's not like that. You know, we say the East is not a direction. It's not the opposite of West. The East means... light. East is not a place, it's a being. It's a... it's where spirituality originates. So, Vairajana is the Buddha, radiant light, which pervades everywhere.

[22:37]

And it's sometimes called darkness. So, light and darkness... that light is not the opposite of darkness, but it includes darkness. And sometimes we call it darkness, which includes light. But light and darkness are simply... they're not really opposites, they're complements. Sometimes a place looks very dark, but to another creature it looks very light. Sometimes light looks one way to one creature and dark to another. Little rodents run around at night because it's so light for them. It's very dark for us.

[23:40]

So, light and dark. This is not the light of comparative values. It's the light that illuminates. It's life itself. So... So, Master Wang Chi called it silent illumination. Tsa Zen is silent illumination. To just simply sit in the midst of... grounded in radiant light. You may think, well, this is just boring. But actually, if you pay attention, it's more than just boring. Boring means disconnected. If you think about the meaning of boring, boring means I'm disconnected.

[24:45]

So then there's the Hokkyo Zamae of Master Tozan. Hokkyo means precious mirror. The precious mirror samadhi. Mirror, of course, sees everything as it is, without distortion. When you hold the mirror up, there are mirrors that distort. This is not that kind of mirror. This is the mirror that sees everything as it is. Things as it is. Without distortion. Mostly, we see things in a distorted way through emotion thought. As soon as we think about something or feel something about something, it's a distorted view. Sometimes it's fairly accurate, but it's still distorted. However we think and however we feel, there's a distortion based on self-centeredness.

[25:55]

So this mirror, samadhi, is the samadhi that's free of emotion thought and simply sees everything as it is. That's the hard thing to do. Because we're always biased in our feelings and our thoughts. So the center is moved off. Instead of being self-centered, it's Buddha-centered. And by being Buddha-centered, it sees things clearly. We see things clearly. Things are seen clearly. So, there's another samadhi called Samay-o-Samay, meaning the king samadhi, which includes all samadhis.

[27:00]

You know, Zazen, strictly speaking, is not one of the meditation practices of Buddhism. Zazen is Samay-o-Samay, which means the samadhi of infinite meanings. Which means the samadhi that includes all the samadhis of Buddhism. The reason why it's called this is because it's not step-by-step practice to gain enlightenment from delusion. Many of the meditation practices of Buddhism are geared to move away from, little by little, step away from delusion until you get to enlightenment. But that's not Zazen. Zazen is when you sit down, you're immediately immersed in Samay-o-Samay, whether you know it or not.

[28:19]

Because delusion and enlightenment are not two. We're not trying to get away from delusion to get to enlightenment. Enlightenment needs delusion in order to be expressed. We say, may we exist, in our meals chant, we say, may we exist in muddy water like a lotus. Exist in purity, the purity like a lotus in muddy water. The lotus does not exist without muddy water. If you pull the lotus out of the muddy water, too bad. It's over. It only exists in the muddy water. Plants exist in the earth.

[29:23]

They have to have earth in order to exist. So, you have to have delusion in order for our flower of enlightenment to bloom. So, fortunately we're stuck in muddy water. But sometimes we call it dripping muddy water. Dredging through muddy water. So, don't give up hope. I mean, give up hope. Who said give up hope? So, samadhi is the balanced state. The stable state in the midst of delusion. Not some special state. But finding stability, what Suzuki Roshan called calmness of mind,

[30:26]

within the problems of this world. And the problem of the self. The biggest problem is the problem of the self. Which we all have to deal with. It's one thing to deal with the problems of the world. But, you know, this is the biggest problem right here. Dramas will continue to unfold in the world day by day. The Boston drama is one of them. How do we deal with that? The reason why it's such a problem is because it's so close. But this happens every day in the other part of the world. Every single day. You turn the paper, 15 people blown up. 25 and 75 people, and then you turn the page.

[31:31]

Because what can you do except turn the page? But what are you? How do you deal with yourself? What's going on in here? Do you forget it? Do you ignore it? Do you grieve about it? Anyway, finding our stability, our samadhi mind, which doesn't mean to escape, but it means to be really present with what's present, without being turned over. How do you live your life, moment by moment? Totally, on each moment. Bringing each moment to life, that's samadhi. How do we bring each moment to life? Bringing life to life. Some things are less significant than others. Some things are more significant than others, that may be so.

[32:36]

But yet, everything is significant. As well as nothing is significant. But everything, every moment is a significant moment in our life. Beyond our judgement. So, for a Zen student, if we have devotion to practice, then practice in turn feeds us. You know, we have food that feeds us, we have sunshine that feeds us, water that feeds us, but spiritually, we have practice that feeds us.

[33:41]

Without the practice that feeds us, we simply appear in our, you know, maybe from here up. So, practice feeds the whole body, mind and spirit. And we need that nourishment, continuously, as a stream of energy, that both receives and gives, without hindrance. And if there's some hindrance, some blockage, you know, I'll give this much, but I'm going to keep this much. Well, you know, if that's the case, then you give this much, and then you get back this much. When you give a lot, you get back a lot. When you're stingy, you get very little. So, what practice is, is what you give is what you get.

[34:44]

It's very simple. But then we try to even it out. Well, let's say, if I give this much, then I'll get that much. That's calculation. You can't do that. No. At least, when you're doing what you're doing, do it thoroughly. It's hard. And I'm not the best person to do it. I'm telling you this, but I'm not so good at it. So, just being able to let go. As Shakyamuni says, all I'm teaching you is to put down the burden. You carry this stuff around. You just carry so much stuff around. And it stops us from really working so hard,

[35:51]

carrying all this baggage. I have this wonderful cartoon, Ross's Chest, for the New Yorker, that I still keep. It's one of my favorite cartoons. And there's the airport baggage claim. And people are standing around the baggage claim, and just, oh, there's my resentment. For your sister. And he's saying, oh yeah, there's my sister. So, lay down the burden. That's practice. Stop carrying around the old baggage. You know, when a person becomes ordained, that's when they start their life. And all the old baggage is gone. I mean, it's still there.

[36:52]

But, you're taking this vow to let go of all the old baggage. And that's called freedom. Do you have a question? I have a short question. I mean, a short question. About the baggage? Yes. About letting go of it, could it also be possible that maybe you can't get rid of it,

[37:57]

but can work with it to transform it in some way? I would say, yes. Get rid of it is a big sign. Deal with it. But you have to remember that someday you'll die. Do you want to carry it with you? I remember Suzuki Roshi talking about shikantaza. He said, I didn't really get serious about shikantaza until I started to die. He talked about going to the narrows in Tassajara, where they had this big pole, and the students jumped into the pole, and he didn't know how to swim. But he just went and jumped in,

[38:58]

and he realized that he couldn't swim. That's when I started to really take seriously shikantaza. So, what should I do about my baggage? That's just more baggage. Creating more baggage by thinking about what I'm going to do about my baggage. Karma follows you, you know, like a shadow. So you do have your karma. Right. That's right. But you can ease your karma. You can soften that up by forgiveness. That's really important. Resentment is a stoppage. Resentment will stop everything. Repentance and forgiveness are

[40:02]

disengagement. Especially, forgiveness is really disengagement. Okay, I'm going to set you free. It has nothing to do with whether I like you or don't like you, and everything is alright. No. It's just, I'm going to set you free. That's what that is. Forgiveness sets you free. And resentment ties you in. What do you like? I mean, what do you want? Do you want to carry the resentment around, or do you want to set it free? So, forgiveness sets you free. And repentance sets you free. So those are two very important tools in your kit. In your toolbox. I felt like I had an insight this morning,

[41:18]

which is very similar to what you're talking about, which is simply that, if I'm daydreaming habitually, a lot of it is to do with that there's something that I don't like about the present moment. Maybe subconsciously, I don't like the present moment for some reason. It's irritating or whatever. But if I like the present moment, or I feel comfortable with the present moment, then that's being present. Yes, well, this is why Zazen is the great teacher. It teaches us that we don't have to be attached to whatever is happening. We have to acknowledge what's happening but we don't have to be attached to it. Attachment means, I don't like. We usually think of attachment as, I want. But it's the same.

[42:20]

Don't want is attachment. You're attached to what you're attached to and not wanting. And that's even worse in some ways. But they're equal. I don't like this. And the more you don't like it, the more it hurts. The more you don't want it, the more intrusive it is. That's attachment. So, you know, I like to use this analogy, the difference between the lion and the dog. As much as I love dogs, I think they're really intelligent. But when you have a stick, and you start shaking the stick in front of the dog, the dog follows the stick. So you can control the dog with the stick. But you do that with the lion, and the lion goes with the person. That may not be completely true, but it's a great analogy. There seems to be

[43:28]

a magical quality when you let go of things. Yes. That arises. And I have found this quality to be kind of startling, and at the same time, wonderful. Yeah. And I'm not quite sure where it comes from. Well, because it's your natural endowment. It's not something that comes from some place. When you act, I remember Suzuki-ko, she said, magic is not something special. It's your ordinary life when the blockage is gone. Everything is magic. Magic is our natural environment.

[44:28]

When we take off the blinders, it's our natural environment. Everything sparkles. But we keep it down. Make it dim. So how would you open that up for someone else? Well, you open it up for yourself, because you have the ability to do that without knowing it. You do that without knowing it, by just being yourself. Don't try. Don't interfere. Don't interfere with it. Yes? Would you say that the baggage is dimming the light? The baggage is... Dimming. Yeah, well, yeah. It takes a... It gets heavy.

[45:33]

Burdensome. It's... Change, gain, change, gain. It gets heavy.

[45:38]

@Text_v004
@Score_JJ