Zazenshin Class

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Good evening. This is our last class for practice period. Toward the end of our last meeting, we started with Wanshi Sogarku's friendly advice for seated meditation. His poem, where the whole thrust of the zazen shin culminates with his poem. And we started, but I think we should start again.

[01:00]

And then, of course, Dogen gives his commentary on each line, and then at the end, Dogen says, Well, I really like this, and since I like it so much, I've made my own complimentary version, in which there is no commentary. So, this is difficult, this particular, this poem is difficult. Because there's not a lot of, it doesn't give you much, you know. Do you kind of know where we are? You don't? Well, we have a number of translations, and we have Bielfeld's translation, and we have Coss' translation, and we have Nirman's translation.

[02:07]

Those are three translations that we have. I asked you to download Nirman's translation, as we were leaving last time. So, if you have it, you're in luck. If you don't have it, you're out of luck. So, I'd like to go kind of back and forth. Not back and forth, but comparing some translations with each other. So, I hope we get through with it, finish it probably well. But we probably won't have much time for Dogen's poem.

[03:10]

But we're going to start with Nirman's poem. I also have a translation by Shohako Okamura, which I haven't presented to you yet. I haven't studied it so much myself. So, I'm just going to read the poem. Does everybody have the right page? In the Nirman, it's page 346. You can just listen. It's good to read it, but if you don't have it, you just listen. So, he calls it, My Friendly Advice for Seated Meditation. As we know, everybody translates it a little bit differently. Completed by Meditation Master Wanshi Shogaku. That's his Japanese name, even though he's Chinese.

[04:20]

The important function for Buddha after Buddha, and the pivotal moment for ancestor after ancestor, is to know IT, notice he capitalizes IT, is to know IT without stirring anything up, and to be illumined without setting up an opposite. When one knows IT without stirring anything up, such knowledge is naturally humble. When one is illumined without setting up an opposite, such illumination is naturally subtle. Since that knowing is naturally humble, there is never a discriminating thought. Since that illumination is naturally subtle, there is never the least outward sign of it. Since there is never a discriminating thought, that knowledge is wondrous, with nothing left to be dealt with.

[05:28]

Since there is never the least outward sign of it, that illumination is complete, with nothing left unrealized. The water is now so clear, you can see to its depths, as fish swim by at their leisure. The sky is now so clear, it is boundless, as birds fly off, leaving no trace. So, there are words that are repeated here, statements that are repeated, and it's kind of like, because of this, this, and because of this, this. So, you see, the important function, and the pivotal moment, is to know IT without stirring anything up.

[06:32]

Stirring anything up means thinking, basically, ruminating, opinionating, trying to figure it out. That's called stirring things up. The important function for Buddha after Buddha, and the pivotal moment. Pivotal moment is like the moment of turning. The pivotal moment for ancestor after ancestor is to know IT without stirring anything up. So, if you kind of get the picture that he's talking about Zazen, the meaning of Zazen, and you can relate everything to that, the important function is Zazen, right away. The important function for Buddha after Buddha is Zazen, whatever that means. We try to explain Zazen, we talk about Zazen is this, Zazen is that, but actually, nobody knows what Zazen is.

[07:49]

Even though we know what Zazen is, you don't know what Zazen is. If you say, oh, I know what Zazen is, you don't know what Zazen is. If you say, I don't know what Zazen is, in a true sense, it's like when the emperor asked Bodhidharma, who are you? He says, I don't know. So, Zazen actually is, I don't know. Zazen is the true you. Zazen is simply the truth of our existence, and non-existence. So the important function for Buddha after Buddha, when he says Buddha after Buddha, he's really talking about succession, because in Zen, as we know, there's no special sutra. We chant the Heart Sutra every day, which is a touchstone for our understanding, but there's not a sutra that we study that is, in Buddhism, most schools of Buddhism have a sutra that they study, like the Lotus Sutra is very common.

[09:15]

And the old ancient Buddhists would study Abhidharma, the analysis of dharmas, and so forth. But in Zen, there's no special sutra that we study. So the teaching is handed down, we say, from warm hand to warm hand, from teacher to student, teacher to student, teacher to student. So, Buddha after Buddha. The important function for Buddha after Buddha, meaning transmitting Zazen from one to another. And this is why, although there's monastic practice, usually there's one teacher who passes the Dharma down to students, rather than a school, learning something in school.

[10:34]

There's Komazawa University in Japan, which is a Buddhist university, Soto Zen University, and the monks, I mean the young students, it's a regular curriculum, but they also learn about Buddhism. And then many of them go to the monastery for two or three years, get their monastic training, but not so many of them have a teacher. Well, their father becomes their teacher when they go back to the temple. Typically, small monasteries, or training temples, is where monks get their more intimate training.

[11:39]

So, the important function for Buddha after Buddha, and the pivotal moment for ancestor after ancestor. Pivotal moment is like the moment of awakening. Pivotal moment, or we say there are turning words. Sometimes, when we study the koans, we're always confronted with, what always comes up is the turning word. The teacher will take the student's toes and twist it, and that will be a turning point of awakening. Now from now on, everybody has to come up and get their nose tweaked. Too bad. But a pivotal moment can just be whenever one has a realization, some realization.

[12:47]

So, as a pivotal moment for ancestor after ancestor is to know it. I think we talked about, I talked about it before, and I know that I talked about it last Thursday night. It is, you know, you can't say, describe it, because it is the whole universe. It is your true body. You see, the true, your true body is the whole universe. When you let go of, drop body and mind, then you are full, fully filled, instead of partly filled. That's called full, fully filament. And I dropped the Y. Full filament. Full filament. You train in your used body, or your new body.

[13:52]

And then, you have to keep paying for it through practice. So, the pivotal moment for ancestor after ancestor is to know it, without stirring things up. In other words, let go of your trying to figure it out. And to be illuminal, without setting up an opposite. So, without setting up an opposite, is called non-duality. Between subject and object. So, when one knows it, without stirring anything up, such knowing is naturally humble. Yes, humble means we bow down before it, instead of humbly letting go of self-centeredness, basically. So, when one is illumined, without setting up an opposite, such illumination is naturally subtle.

[15:05]

Subtle means it may not have an outward appearance. You know, there's the old saying, before practice, the world just looks like, we simply see the surface. When we engage in fully in practice, everything falls apart. And then, when the turning happens, the third stage is everything looks just like it did before, except that it's not the same. So, that's subtle. You just return to the world normally, as we say, but there's a big difference.

[16:13]

So, since that knowing is naturally humble, there is never a discriminating thought. Since that illumination is naturally subtle, there is never the least outward sign of it. Since there is never a discriminating thought, that knowing is wondrous, with nothing left to be dealt with. Since there is never the least outward sign of it, the illumination is complete, with nothing left unrealized. So, Monshi Shogaku talks about illumination a lot. He uses that term all the time, as a matter of fact. That's his basic teaching, the teaching of illumination. Light and illumination. The water is now so clear, you can see to its depth.

[17:25]

In other words, you can see all the way down to the bottom. But there is no bottom. This fish swam by at their leisure. This is like a description of, you know, easily moving along. It's like dancing. You're at the bottom. It's totally immersed. Water here doesn't mean H2O. It means the unlimited, the realm of unlimited activity. The sky is now so clear, it is boundless, as birds fly off, leaving no trace. So this is not the sky that we see surrounding the earth.

[18:32]

This is the unlimited realm. So the word for emptiness, the term for emptiness, is also the term for the sky. But in this case, it doesn't mean the sky, it means emptiness. If it wasn't for emptiness, everything would be stuck in place. If there was such a thing as emptiness, something. So it means total freedom of movement without any hindrance. So that's a kind of little overview of this poem. I'll just read it from a different translation, which is just the poem. Kanna's translation, Tanahashi's translation.

[19:33]

The hub of Buddha's activity, the turning of the ancestor's hub. So this is similar. Is known free of forms, illuminated beyond conditions. As it is known, free of forms, the knowledge is subtle. As it is illuminated beyond conditions, the illumination is wondrous. When the knowledge is subtle, there is no thought of discrimination. When the illumination is wondrous, there is not the slightest hint. When there is no thought of discrimination, the knowledge is extraordinary with no comparison. When there is not the slightest hint, the illumination has nothing to grasp. The water is clear to the bottom, where the fish swims without moving.

[20:37]

The sky is vast and boundless. Where the bird flies away in the distance. We talked a little last time about the bird's path. Master Tozan talks about the bird's path, which leaves no trace. Leaving no trace is considered the best way for a Zen student to find their course through the world. Leaving no trace. Which means not being bogged down by anything. There is also the picture of the tortoise, which moves very slowly and covers its tracks.

[21:42]

Except that the tail goes like this, and always leaves a trail. There is also the koan of the buffalo. The buffalo jumps through the window. His head, his legs, belly, the whole body leaps through the window. Except everything gets through except the tail. What is the problem with this little tail that can't get through the window? So, no matter how hard we try, there is always some trace. So it kind of means like, cleanly going through the world. Without creating a lot of karma, or a lot of problems for everybody. So, I have here Oshokebore's translation.

[23:07]

He says, the essential function of the Buddhas and the functioning essence of the ancestors. I think that's pretty literal. I think that's more literal. The essential function of the Buddhas and the functioning essence of the ancestors. So this alludes, this is the beginning, the first, you know. Function and essence is how, you know, actually what's going on here. Essence is it, and the function is zazen. The function of it is zazen. The function of our Buddha nature, which is called it, is zazen. And zazen is our true life. Our fundamental life. Our activity.

[24:11]

That's exactly Viet-Hal's translation too. Yeah, his too. So, knowing without touching things, illuminating without facing objects. Knowing without touching things, the wisdom is by nature inconspicuous. And illuminating without facing objects, the illumination is by nature subtle. Without facing objects is an interesting statement. Basically, there are no objects. Objects, there's an objective world and a subjective world. I remember Suzuki Roshi saying, our life is totally subjective. Everything is on this side. So when we discriminate between subject and object, we are just creating objectivity.

[25:28]

There is objectivity, which is important, but in a non-dual sense, subject and object are not two. So we say, they're not one, because there is a subject and object, but they're not two. Because subject and object arise together. Consciousness arises when the subject and the object are one, but we discriminate them as two. So I have this bunch of papers in my hand, and I can say, the paper is an object, it's just an object. I'm fanning myself. But really, the paper and myself are not two things.

[26:36]

I can discriminate them as two things, but basically they're not one thing. So, one and two, discrimination, non-discrimination. So here we're talking about the non-discrimination aspect, the non-discriminating aspect of things, of ourself and objects. So, knowing without touching things, the wisdom by nature inconspicuous. So this knowing without touching things is different than our usual knowledge through sensory perception. It's an innate knowing, not an acquired knowing. It's the intuition, our direct understanding, our directly knowing, without going through the process of discriminating. You have to remember that discriminating means separation.

[27:42]

What is discriminated is separated. Non-discrimination means no separation. So, illumining without facing objects is the illumination. The illumination is by nature subtle. Wisdom, which is by nature inconspicuous, never has discriminating thoughts. Illumination, which is by nature subtle, never has the slightest separation. Wisdom, which never has the discriminative thought, has no dichotomy, but sees oneness. Illumination, which never has the slightest separation, has no attachment, but is evident. The water is clear to the bottom. A fish is swimming slowly, slowly. The sky is infinitely vast. A bird is flying far away. You know, we say the bird makes the sky.

[28:45]

The sky is like empty, right? Basically, I mean, it's not empty, it's quite full. The way we perceive and think about it is like, oh, the empty sky. And then when a bird flies across the sky, you read, oh, there's the sky. The bird makes the sky. The sky makes the bird. So, those are three different translations. And I'm going to read the commentary, and we can discuss it. Any time you have a question, any time, you know, raise the question. Is that time already? Okay. Take one minute to change your position if you need to.

[29:49]

Am I right? You shouldn't have mentioned it. You know, it's good to talk about it, even if I don't know. This is not a bathroom break. We should have thought of that before we left. Anyway, I'm just going to start again. Okay, I'm going to go over what we talked about last time. It didn't get very far, so I'm just going to start at the beginning of the Nirman translation on page 347. Okay?

[30:58]

The point, I think this is Dogen speaking, the point of this needle, remember he called it acupuncture needles of Zen, the point of this needle of seated meditation is the great function which manifests before our eyes, our very eyes. So, he's talking about the function, the function of the essence. The essence manifests itself as function, right? So, the point of this needle of seated meditation is the great function which manifests before our very eyes. It is our everyday behavior when we look beyond words and forms. It is our glimpsing that which existed before father and mother was born. It is our seeing that it is good not to slander ancestors of the Buddha.

[32:03]

It is our never avoiding the chance to let go of self and to cast away body and mind. It is our having a head as large as a Buddha's seated upon the neck of an ordinary person. So, it is our everyday behavior when we look beyond words and forms. It is our glimpsing that which existed before father and mother was born. So, this is like, this is a very famous statement, you know, it's a koan, what were you doing before your father and mother were born? Where were you before your father and mother were born? So, this is going beyond birth and death. It's like, where is your true self before father and mother were born?

[33:06]

It gives us an opportunity to look beyond our ordinary way of thinking. It is our seeing that it is good not to slander ancestors of the Buddha. It is our never avoiding the chance to let go of self-centeredness. Basically, let go of self and cast away body and mind. Basically, letting go of self-centeredness. It is our never, it is our having a head as large as a Buddha's seated upon the neck of an ordinary person. So, ordinary, we say, Buddhas and ordinary beings are not two. This is the basis of Soto Zen. Basic statement of Soto Zen is ordinary beings and Buddhas are not two different people. So, the important function for Buddha after Buddha,

[34:13]

this is Nitin Arman's translation, and then Dogen says, beyond doubt, Buddha after Buddha has created Buddha after Buddha as the important function. When that important function has manifested, that is what seated meditation is. I want to compare that with Kaws, who says, the hub of Buddha's activity. Buddhas do not fail to make Buddhas the hub. This hub is manifested and that is Zazen. The turning of the ancestor's hub. One's master's words are incomparable. This understanding is the basis of ancestors transmitting Dharma and transmitting the robe. Turning heads and exchanging faces is the hub of Buddha's activity.

[35:17]

Turning faces and exchanging heads is the turning of the ancestor's hub. So, it's like turning towards Dharma. The hub is like turning from ordinary to Dharma. Ordinary activity to Dharmic activity. And exchanging faces means that you exchange your ordinary face for Buddha's face. But it's very subtle. Nobody can tell the difference, except that you can. You can tell the difference when you see someone as an ordinary person, and when they practice it, they don't look the same. I can tell immediately when someone's face has changed. Do they ever change back?

[36:19]

That's called backsliding. So, Nirman says, The pivotal moment for ancestor after ancestor. And Dogen says, My former master, who was Ruijin, Dogen's teacher, My former master went beyond using such words as these. The principle underlying this is just what ancestor after ancestor means. It involves the transmission of the teaching and the transmission of the robe. In general, every single instance of turning one's head and changing one's expression is what the essential function of Buddha after Buddha has been. And every single case of changing one's expression and turning one's head is what the pivotal moment has been for ancestor after ancestor. So, you know, this is just explaining the poem.

[37:24]

So, and then, to know it without stirring anything up. And Dogen says, To know does not mean to perceive. Not a matter of perception. For our perceptions are a small gauge of it. Nor is this the knowing associated with intellectual understanding. For intellectual understanding is but a mental construct. Hence, to know is to not stir things up. For when we do not stir things up, we know. So, illumination is, everything is illumination. Everything is totally illuminated. But because we stir things up, we don't see the illumination. The illumination is obscured. So this is why in Zazen, we let go of everything.

[38:26]

And we don't stir up any dust. We don't stir up anything. And the illumination is just there. But as Dogen says, in his fascicle, Komyo, that it's not like the light of a jewel, or the light of a firefly, or some special light. It's just everything. It's just a term for vitality, or the essence, which is everywhere. Buddha nature. It's the most common thing right in front of us. But we just take it for granted. We all see it. We all experience it. It's beyond our experience, even though we experience it. Even though

[39:27]

it's within the confusion. It's also the confusion. It's the light of our confusion. It's the light of our dismal-ness. But when we let the dust settle, it becomes clear. Even though in our daily activity, we stir things up, but it's within stirred-up stuff that it sparkles. So he says, hence, to know it is to not stir things up. For when we do not stir things up, we know. Do not broad-mindedly judge it to be something everyone knows, and do not narrow-mindedly limit it to one's own personal knowledge.

[40:31]

Interesting statement. That phrase, not stirring things up, is equivalent to saying, when clear-mindedness comes, be clear-minded. And when dark-mindedness comes, be dark-minded. It is the same as saying, by sitting, to break through the skin that our mother bore. In other words, we have to get beyond our own skin. And when clear-mindedness comes, it's usually like, I mean, literally, when light comes, hit it with light. When dark comes, hit it with darkness. It means the same thing. Hit it means, it is a kind of strong term that Dogen likes to use, or actually, it's not Dogen's term, but he uses it. I mean, just be that at that moment. When light comes, just be light.

[41:41]

When dark comes, just be dark. Then, the poem says, to be illumined without setting up an opposite. This being illumined is not the being illumined associated with being completely out in the open, nor is it spiritual illumination. Rather, it is our not setting up opposing conditions. So basically, what Dogen is saying here is that it hasn't got anything to do with spiritual illumination, or any other kind of illumination. It has to do with simply not splitting the world into pieces. When there's no discrimination, that's illumination. That constitutes being illumined. Illumination does not change into a condition,

[42:43]

because conditions are the very things illuminated. So, illumination is not a thing. It's more like a quality, or maybe not. Not setting up opposites means that throughout the universe, there has never been anything hidden, and that a shattered world does not stick out its head. It is what is humble, it is what is subtle, and it is what is beyond being interdependent or dependent. Suzuki Roshi, in his Santo Kai talks, used the word independency. I talked about that before. He made up this term, independency. And I said, well, I've never heard that word before. And he said, well, I must have made it up.

[43:45]

But it's like, things are independent, and things are interdependent. Even though things are interdependent, there's a feeling that things are independent. You may feel that we're all totally interdependent, which is true, but at the same time, we each feel independent. So, it's an in-between thing. Interdependency, a tendency to be independent. We have this tendency to be independent, but so it's not exactly interdependent, and it's not exactly independent. It's the reconciliation of interdependence and independence. The interconnectedness of interdependence, because interdependence is interconnected. But he's talking about dependent and independent.

[44:47]

Independency. So, a shattered world means a world that's not... means a discriminated world. You take one thing, and you shatter it into pieces. That's called our life. You take the one piece, which is non-discrimination, and discriminate it. So, not setting up opposites means that throughout the universe, there's never been anything hidden, and that a shattered world does not stick out its head. So, shattered world means... discriminated. Discriminated. Divided. And what is humble, it is what is humble.

[45:52]

It is what is subtle, and it is what is beyond being interdependent or independent. So, and then Shogaku... Monshi Shogaku says, since that knowing is naturally humble, there is never a discriminating thought. And then Dogen says, this means knowing what discriminating thinking is without necessarily having to make use of some external assistance. That also could be translated as without other power. In Buddhism, we talk about self-power and other power, and people attribute this to the difference between Pure Land Buddhism and Zen.

[46:53]

Zen is like self-power. Pure Land Buddhism is like other power. In other words, depending on a Buddha. And Zen is self-reliance. But actually, they're both the same. There's no such thing as self-power, because there's no self. It's all Buddhist power. Anyway. This means knowing that discriminating thinking is without necessarily having to make use of some external assistance. This knowing is of a concrete form, and that concrete form is of mountains and rivers. These mountains and rivers are humble. This humility is subtle. Our making use of this knowing is as lively and free-moving as fish

[47:57]

swimming about in water. There's a term for this. There's a term for this. Something. I forget exactly how. It's like the movement of a fish when you bring it out of the water. The way it slaps around. That kind of vitality. Our making use of this knowing is as lively and free-moving as a fish swimming about in water. Our becoming a dragon does not depend on being on one side of Emperor Yu's gate or the other. This refers to a waterway in the Yangtze River where there's a fish, where there's a step-like condition where the fish have to go up the river. When they make it, they're called dragons because it's so difficult.

[48:57]

Emperor Yu's gate, also known as the Dragon Gate, is a gorge on the Yangtze River. Legend has it that any fish swimming up through the gorge turns into a dragon. This was used as a metaphor for someone who succeeded in passing the difficult Imperial Civil Service examination. Which separated the scholars from everybody else. To paraphrase Doge's remark, those who are truly doing seated meditation are seated Buddha, whether they realize it or not. They do not need to pass an examination to prove they're doing seated Buddha. So, to straightaway employ even a single instance of this knowing is to make use of a pinch of the whole world, with its mountains and rivers, and exerting our whole strength to know. If what we know lacks the familiarity of mountains and rivers, we will not have a single instance of true knowledge,

[49:58]

true knowing, or even have an understanding of it. We should not regret that discriminative wisdom has come to us late. Since Buddha after Buddha has been fully manifested by means of it, there is never a means already. There is never means already. Already discriminative wisdom has fully manifested. Thus there is never a discriminating thought means that not even a single person has been encountered that his self and other have been transcended. So these mountains and rivers is like the real stuff. So this particular paragraph of Dogen

[51:06]

seems to be talking about how you practice. It's about effort. It's really about effort. I'm going to read it again and think about effort. This means knowing what discriminating thinking is without necessarily having to make use of some external assistance. In other words, you have to do it yourself. This knowing is of a concrete form and that concrete form is of mountains and rivers. These mountains and rivers are humble. This humility is subtle. Our making use of this knowing is as lively and free-moving as fish swimming about in water. Our becoming a dragon does not depend on our being on one side of the emperor's gate or the other. To straight away employ even a single instance of this knowing is to make use of a pinch of the whole world with its mountains and rivers and exerting our whole strength to know.

[52:07]

If what we know lacks the familiarity of mountains and rivers we will not have a single instance of true knowing or even have an understanding of it. We should not regret that discriminative wisdom has come to us late. We should not regret that discriminative wisdom has come to us late. What is discriminative wisdom? Well, it's the wisdom to tell one thing from another. Sounds pretty dualistic. Yes, dualistic. Non-duality includes duality. We have to discriminate moment by moment. But this discrimination is based on non-discrimination. He's talking about the discrimination of non-discrimination. He's not talking about self-centered discrimination. I have to be able to see

[53:12]

to utilize our discriminating mind. Otherwise, we just walk into the street and get run over. We wouldn't tell the potatoes from the bowl. So, discrimination is, of course, what we do moment by moment. Discriminate. At the same time, if we realize the illumination of non-discriminating, non-discrimination, then discrimination just becomes not preference, it's beyond, discrimination is beyond self-centered preference. It's simply how things operate. It's simply how things work. Isn't there then also a self,

[54:16]

moment by moment? I don't mean as an actual self. You're so driven on duty. There is a self, moment by moment. But there's no abiding self. There's no abiding self, but only a self that appears moment by moment. And that self arises with the whole universe, moment by moment. The whole universe is arising and vanishing moment by moment. And we are a part of that arising and vanishing moment by moment. So then we say, yes, myself. So that's an expedient. But it's not a substantial entity. Although, it certainly feels substantial.

[55:20]

Especially when it hurts. How's your knee? How's your knee? I'm not thinking about it. Oh, sorry. Oh my God. I suddenly became self-conscious. I started discriminating. I'm glad you said that. That's a really good example. As soon as I start discriminating, oh yeah, my knee hurts. But I forgot about it. It's okay. I mean, I don't know what it's going to be like when I stand up tomorrow. But right now, it's okay. Because, out of mind, it's being good to me. It's being very good to me. Because I've been taking care of it. Anyway, thanks for asking. The poem says,

[56:32]

Since that illumination is naturally subtle, there is never the least outward sign of it. The least refers to the whole universe. Since that illumination is naturally subtle, there is never the least outward sign of it. Even so, this illumination is naturally stable. Subtle, I'm sorry. It's not something that you can touch or separate out. It's not an object. So you can't really grasp it. That is why it is as if it had not yet come about.

[57:35]

Do not doubt your eyes and do not trust your ears. In other words, what's right there in front of us, don't doubt it. Don't doubt what's right in front of you. And don't believe everything you hear. That's what that seems to mean. Trust your own eyes, but don't believe everything you hear. Like right now. You don't have to believe this. Clarify, through direct experience, what the principle is that lies beyond deliberate thinking. And do not grab hold of some criterion of what it is by relying on how it is worded. This is what being illumined is. We do get attached to certain phrases and words and concepts. So be careful

[58:38]

not to get attached to the way something is presented. Find out for yourself. This is why there is no duality. This is why there is nothing to grab hold of. It is to say, in effect, while keeping to the view that this experience is rare and relying on its being complete, I still harbor doubts. So, that's good. You should harbor doubts. I don't know what that means exactly, but doubt is an important part of practice. Because we may have some certainty, but be careful of certainty. Be very careful of certainty. Leave room for doubt. Leave room for something else. Doubt gives

[59:44]

weight, a counterbalance. Every forward motive object needs a counterbalance. Otherwise it goes spitting off. And so faith can go spitting off and we need a counterbalance called doubt. Not to keep it back, but to give it guidance. To make sure that these big cats like the cheetahs and the lions, tigers, they have huge tails. And the huge tail is for counterbalance. When they're leaping around, they use that tail as a doubter to check their forward motion. And airplanes need a tail in order to keep them flying, keep them in balance.

[60:51]

So how to balance doubt and faith, that's really our practice. And to not let doubt become skepticism, that's putting too much weight on the tail. The weight should be on the forward motion, but the tail should be at perfect balance with the forward motion so that the movement is smooth. You don't crash. So do not doubt your eyes and don't trip and do. Don't doubt your eyes and do not trust your ears. Clarify to direct experience that the principle is that lies beyond deliberative thinking and do not grab hold of some criterion or what it is by relying on how it is worded. This is what being illumined is. This is why there is

[61:53]

no duality. This is why there is nothing to grab hold of. It is to say, in effect, while keeping the view that this experience is rare and relying on its being complete, I still harbor doubts. Now, here's toward the end the last two sentences. The water is now so clear you can see to its depths a fish swims by at its leisure or as fish swim by at their leisure. The water is clear does not mean that the water connected to the sky is the clear water that one can see to its very depths. Still less is the water of the water is clear that which thoroughly cleanses things in the outer material realm. So, you're not talking about water as we know water in the material realm. The water which is unbounded by any bank or shore that is the immaculate water which one penetrates to its very depths. When fish swim by

[62:54]

through this water there is nowhere that they may not go even though their swimming may progress for who knows how many million miles it is immeasurable and it knows no limit. There is no bank to measure it by and there is no space in which it floats. Being without a bottom to sink to there is no one who can measure it. Even were one to discuss various ways of measuring it it is simply the immaculate water whose depths can be seen. The meritorious act of seated meditation is like swimming of fish. Who can reckon what a thousand miles or ten thousand miles are? The action of going down to the very bottom is synonymous with their not trying to trace some bird's trackless path. I remember Suzuki Goji saying our practice is like taking a sieve and throwing it into the ocean. Let's go down

[64:01]

to the bottom. The bottom is bottom. So in zazen there is no limit. It's an unlimited realm which is practiced through our limitations. So in zazen in seated meditation so to speak which is the most confined posture we find the widest freedom unlimited freedom. When you entirely let go you find the unlimited freedom. But it's there within our parameters within our confinement. But the confinement is not confinement. I remember

[65:07]

Suzuki Roshi used to talk about people think that freedom is the unfettered ability to do whatever you want without any boundaries. He said but that kind of freedom is simply confinement. Whereas the confined practice of zazen is the total freedom. There are no boundaries. He said if you grab the tail of a comet people will pity you. Do you understand that? No. I didn't hear it. If you oh no? Go ahead, say it again please. If you try to catch the tail of a comet people will pity you. No. Because you can't do it. Well, I mean I'll tear you to pieces. I mean So the sky

[66:13]

is now so clear it is as boundless as birds fly off leaving no trace. That's the poem. The sky is clear as something unconnected with the heavens. In other words this is not the sky that we think of as the heavens. The emptiness connected with the heavens is not the clear sky. Even less does that which pervades everywhere be it this place or in that refer to the clear sky. What is not hidden or revealed either inside or outside is what the clear sky is. Not hidden and is not revealed. Beings What does that mean? That's a good koan. Not revealed and not hidden. It's not hidden because it's so clear and it's not revealed

[67:13]

because you can't see it. I always like to say you can you can't you can be it but you can't see it. I think that's correct. You can be it but you can't see it. So it's self-consciousness. When we have no self-consciousness then it becomes clear. When birds fly through the sky it is just one method of flying through the sky. The action of flying through the sky is beyond anything we can measure. Flying through the sky is the whole universe because the whole universe is flying through the sky even though we do not know what the extent of this flying is. In assessing it with a statement that is beyond some form of reckoning

[68:14]

Wanchi asserted it as flying off leaving no trace. It means being able to go straight off having no strings tying down one's feet. When the sky is flying off the birds are also flying off. When the birds are flying off the sky too is flying off. Among the sayings which thoroughly explore flying off is the one that says only here do we exist. This is the acupuncture needle of being ever so still. How many thousands of journeys have vied to tell us only here do we exist. This is meditation master Wanchi's kindly advice for doing seated meditation. There's only

[69:29]

right here. No matter how vast the sky is or how much flying off it is there's just only right here. It's always just right here. Right here has nothing to do with some special place. It's just the place where we always are. It's always I like this translation. This Near Mon translation I think is the best one. I'm not really. I'm only underrating it from you I don't know. I'm not reading it. That's one of the differences too. I've read these other two And so maybe during this good one again, it makes it clearer, but somehow it's more comprehensible and not as obscure as either causes or...

[70:33]

Well, I think that Nirma, you know, when you're translating, you don't want to make any mistakes. And so you can stay close to the literal translation, you don't make so many mistakes. The further away you get from the literal translation, the more likely it is that you're making a mistake. But if you have confidence in what you're understanding, then you can interpret. And I think he does a lot of interpreting, but I think he's pretty confident. And so it helps us in our understanding. I almost feel like I'm just sort of a little teeny bit beginning. It's very complicated. Yeah, well, think about... it's not so complicated, actually, it's quite simple.

[71:39]

But what he's talking about is the functioning essence, the essence and the function. So how do we experience the essential or the essence? Because the only way we can experience the essence is through its function, right? How it functions. And the only way we can experience our self, which is a function of the essence. My true self is the essence. And the further we... the more diverse we are, the more complex is that function. So if our function is very simple and total, then there's really...

[72:52]

the essence... I don't want to use the word experience because it's beyond experience, but it also includes experience. Then we experience that illumination more clearly of the essence. That's basically what he's talking about. Yes. Speak loud. I want to share my experience with reading the information, especially those which is not easy to understand at a time. I really can't hear you. Speak up. I can't hear you clearly. I learned how to help myself to be able to understand better when I'm reading something that I cannot understand at first. And before I used to stop there and as a sovereign student just, you know, try to understand it, whatever it is.

[74:05]

But later I learned that it doesn't matter if I can understand it at that moment or not. As soon as I just continue to the end, even if I didn't learn nothing, but the second time I have the instructor in my mind. And it helped me for the second time to start to understand. Well, I agree. Thank you for that. Even if you don't write, we shouldn't feel like there's something wrong if we don't understand right away. Because the understanding is really not intellectual, even though it's termed intellectual in language, right? So he's talking about something beyond language.

[75:06]

He's indicating the poems are indicating something beyond language. And the language is pointing to something and actually pointing to our experience. Beyond our experience. There's some reason why we do sit-satsang. Beyond our reasoning. Beyond our reasoning. We have to experience this. And then we do, but we don't necessarily, you know, we don't necessarily have the realization. And Dogon says this, you know, some may realize it and some may not. But nevertheless, you should just do it. And maybe you'll realize it, maybe you won't. But it doesn't matter if you don't. But the more we focus on it, it helps us, when we focus on it, it helps us to search or be open to it.

[76:17]

To what? It. You had a verb in there. It helps us to be open to it. Be open to it. Yeah. So it's really about opening our mind, letting go of our self-centeredness, and just offering ourself. You know, that's just an offering, a burnt offering. It's just giving ourselves up to it, actually. And when we give ourselves up to it, it feeds us. And it's like, in Hinduism, they say, it's like our mother. It's our mother. And like the Indians say, our mother, you know. The earth is our mother, you know. The universe is our mother. So when we give ourselves up, we're nourished. Basically, it's just what he's saying.

[77:19]

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