The Self

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BZ-02526
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boy
for figure of money
eleven
no
remember my father from the roof
from my driver
keith available
of the him

ha ha
morning everyone
roma

well

thank you very much

hi

can you hear me
i'm welcome everyone and i especially like to welcome anybody who's here for the first time or hasn't been coming to berkeley san center for very long and i'm usually teaching on saturdays and though i enjoy that work a lot
i'm always really happy to be able to come here honor and off saturday and practice with you all so it's good to be here
a couple of weeks ago i woke up thinking about the game joe on i'm not really sure why but i decided to go with it to ah
to explore why i had woken up thinking of it so i read it again and am i started carrying around a couple of questions with me about the to go on and i'm just kind of sitting with them and the
first question was just kind of like what is it what is the to con and the second question was what does it have to offer us in these times
as we practice daily and on i started to read a lot mostly suzuki roshi you can go to google and just type in suzuki roshi on game joe cohen and get many many of
transcripts of his lectures his comments in lectures and then whole lectures devoted to begin to oh come on
and i kept carrying that question what does the ginza cohen have to offer us because
no matter what our political persuasion is
we can all admit that we're living in a time of great division in our country and
it looks like that division ah
seeps out into on many parts of our lives we can see hum
reaction and conflict all around us in our supermarkets in airports on the street maybe in our workplace maybe even right here in our sanga
so before i i want to read a little bit to you i want to talk to a little bit about those words can and cohen
again i think means something like a manifestation or present and joe
it means something like become so put together on i think of it like present being or being as is
and on
on if you're if you're new to zen and you're not familiar with co on isn't in my understanding a kind of on can be a story or a dialogue or riddle or kind of puzzle on that has some kind of issue under consideration but not
consideration from our kind of regular usual way of reasoning
but on
come on can't we can't get at it through our usual kind of reasoning it's inadequate in some way so the cohen kind of throws at us on a kind of paradox
and can give us the opportunity to
i don't know be aroused awakened wake up to some truth
and the thing about a con as we can keep coming back to it over and over over a lifetime actually and each time we come back to it because of the take changing nature of our own lives and life itself we can meet it in a a new way of fresh way
see something new so i kind of want to make it really clear that what i'm saying today is coming from a limited perspective a limited understanding
i began joe khan was written by dogan our
ancestor in twelve thirty three and it's widely read and studied and famous and often quoted
so the game joe cohen is called actualizing the fundamental point and i wanted just read a very small part of it as a way to kind of 'em inspire us and see the great optimism in it it's encouragement
to us and that encouragement ah offers inspiration
and also as weighed kind of set the stage for what i really want to talk about which is the self the self the dogan talks about so on
to study the buddha ways to study the self to study the self is to forget the self to forget the self is to be actualized by myriad things when actualized by myriad things your body and mind as well as the bodies and minds of others drop away no trace of realization read
mainz and this no trace continues endlessly when you first sikh dharma you imagine you're far away from its environs but dharma is already correctly transmitted you are immediately original self
here the way unfolds the boundary of realization is not distinct for the realization comes forth simultaneously with the mastery of buddha dharma do not suppose that what you realize becomes your knowledge and is grasped by your consciousness although actualized immediate
lee the inconceivable may not be apparent it's appearance is beyond your knowledge
so
actualizing the fundamental point what does that mean well i think of actualizing in the way that duggan's talking about it as realizing in action so there's movement or change
and fundamental point we all know that word fundamental or foundation we usually think of as some kind of basis foundation but it can also mean original and actually i was thinking about in on in music
i'm
the fundamental notice the root of a is the lowest note in accord so for me there's a feeling of something that's underneath
i'm so something like realize in action or realized in original place or realize in body mind or realize in buddha
buddha nature
something that's underneath and what is it underneath i think it's underneath his self that his telling us to to study and what self is that that he's telling us to study well isn't it the self that we all
ah work with the self that attaches it said itself to an idea the self that discriminates
self and other the self that has preferences
i think that's the self he's talking about and that self is not unique
it's in all of us
so in that way that's a breath of fresh air it's not unique so we can notice it study it and not move away from that state of observation because we feel
embarrassed or upset or we take it so personally when we study the self we're not we're really studying everything i think
so we don't separate from what we observe and we don't judge
and we dropped the commentary
oh i'd like to share with you what suzuki roshi has to say and maybe comment on what he says
i have a few passages we'll see how many
we have time for
so on according to dogan but in suzuki roshi words or his translation he says to study buddhism is the study ourselves
notice he doesn't save yourself he says ourselves to study ourselves as to go beyond ourselves to go beyond ourselves as to be enlightened by all things to be enlightened by all things is to free our body and mind and to free our body and bodies the bodies and minds of others
no trace of enlightenment and remains and this no trace continues endlessly so now his commentary he says here he meaning dogan says direct understand
explains direct understanding in realm of subjective and objective objectivity there is no subjective understanding or objective understanding in direct experience there is no subjectivity no objectivity so to study rc
shelves is to study everything
that is the study of buddhism to take everything in
to study ourselves to supposed to go beyond ourselves to go beyond ourselves is to be enlightened by all things so suzuki roshi says enlightenment comes from all things to us think this is a really important point when we attain in law
statement meant everything comes you know enlightenment comes from all things you might say and then he says quote and he laughs they made me enlightenment enlightened or i attained enlightenment that is the same thing and direct in spirit experience but in intellectual understanding is not the stain
i understand something but indirect experience i understand something means a truth came to me
it's kind of a nice way to save a tooth came to me
although i didn't expect it
i didn't try to understand it he laughs but they made me understand
so i i think all of us have this experience we could probably go around the room and everybody tell some experience of ah the truth coming to us it's not so unusual but i have some images that came to me on
one is if we have the chance to be out in a wild place on and were settled and there's not much human activity were in this wild place and ah
we can really see our place in the whole environment or places so small
but it's not a bad feeling it's some kind of
understanding of our place in the world
it's not a bad feeling
ah have another image that came to me when i read this was like an orchestra or a symphony were all the parts come together
and you know no one part can be puffed up or it ruins the whole thing
and there's a ah a sense of that in the practice of all those musicians and even the audience and we know the feeling when we were in the audience and someone's talking or someone's on there
phone or someone's coughing or whatever it is but when those moments when it doesn't happen something happens we can't really talk about what is that that happens but some some truth comes to us
arms
even in a machine when everyone is working together in the various ah
positions and not any of us are thinking my position my job my territory little when were all working together harmoniously on
it's a a wonderful mysterious moment and i think it's the kind of enlightenment that dogan is talking about this direct experience experience in activity
the last image that came to my mind is when we have the opportunity to sit with someone who is at the end of her or his life and you know in those last few minutes were all the really is is breathing and we have that
opportunity to simply follow the breath of the other person i'm
something may
may happen
we may lose sight of hum our fear or our ah are feeling of loss or sadness and there's just breathing
and it's a a can be a wonderful intimate experience
i'm
whats say

so no trace of enlightenment he says no trace of enlightenment means it remains because there's no subjectivity or objectivity in our enlightenment and i think he means enlightenment activity
so there's no trace nothing to see
if you think about it in direct experience we can't say i'm being enlightened or i am enlightened the minute we say that we've fallen down were off the mark
there's no trace continues endlessly so when we when we know when we think we know what is truth that's not enough that is far away from its environs when we discover that the truth has already been correctly or correctly transmit
did to us
we are ourselves at that moment and that ourselves that he's talking about is that deeper self the buddha nature
when we find our true nature and our way of life as the most suitable way to our inherent nature that is what is
that is enlightenment
when we find our true nature or our way of life i think he's talking about everyday life just regular ordinary everyday life
nothing special know where to get
ah me what comes up in our lives
at first it looks like you know you're trying to do something when you understand what is the purpose of practice you will understand that that was my nature but i didn't know
that was my nature but i didn't know
how often do we want remind ourselves this very being is buddha
that's not a puffed up statement we know what a puffed up statement is
but that's not a puffed up statement this very being is buddha i must take this life seriously
what what is already there
is something i can access
it's not outside myself it's not something i can get i don't need to improve myself to get it
it feels like a breath of fresh air disney

when you discover that the truth has been transmitted to us inherently wrong before and now i have found it
that is to understanding you have to continue it until you find your true nature in your practice that is realization of the truth
when you what you study is as dogan says to study buddhism is to study yourself ourselves you know
when we find out ourselves in our study in our practice that is realization of the truth
so that you know he stresses that over and over ourselves he wants us to get away from talking about me myself mine
to train ourselves that way
so as long as you try to find out your true nature by practice you know you cannot find out but if you find out your true nature in practice or if you think the practice itself is your true nature that is enlightenment when i've
read this statement you know i teach english as a second language and suzuki roshi of course his first language is not english and it's amazing to me that he can pinpoint this difference between by and in
that if you think you can find your true nature by practice so the implication there is that you're going to practice to get something
then he says no no no change that preposition
you can't find out but if you find your to practice your true nature in practice or if you think the practice itself is your true nature that is enlightenment
so again he's talking about activity enlightened activity not enlightenment as an end but the activity itself
and direct experience of merging
connecting
the practice is not some means to attainment and in practice you should find out your true nature

when you're busy working on something it's not possible to see what you've done
if you want to see you have to stop doing it then you will know what you've done even though it's not possible to see what you've done when you've done something there's attainment there's no doubt in it but usually are very curious about what we have done that's okay but when you see it you have already put your practice
in a limitation and you are comparing it to some attainment when your entertainment is better than what you did before or better than what someone else did you will be pleased with it
if it is not you will be discouraged but that is not because you're attainment is not good enough or is not perfect
i'm this made me think of something that our daughter told us recently seized on setting dance in college and when she was home over the semester break she did a several day long our intensive at san francisco conservatory and
at the end of the intensive on the last evening there was a kind of sit around and a period and some people were in were some of the students were interested in arm
how to audition well and the question was as best i can relate to recollect something like when you're auditioning
how do you give the people who are judging you what they want
how do you figure out what they're looking for and still be true to yourself and who you are
and so she said one of the teacher said stop thinking about what they want stop focusing try to stop trying to figure out what they want
and be the movement
be the movement
be yourself who you are is already enough she said that about three times to us mama she said who we are is enough so be the movement and i thought wow what a wonderful thing for a teacher to ah tell a group of
ah dancers in such a competitive field i'm one of the other teachers is a professional dancer and he stands all over the world and
he spent before teaching this intensive the last nine months in a monastery
and so he said to them
what i learned in the monastery is you have to be yourself and so if you wanna be a good dancer be yourself and of course i don't know what self he was talking about but i like to think he was talking about this very same self
that we're talking about the one that's underneath the one that does all the worrying and reacting and one this
solid and observant and understanding
the world around us

though we have already attained supreme enlightenment we may not necessarily see some may and some may not after we read that some may and some may not we might feel deflated like oh i might be one of those
right
i know for myself i'm a very slow and methodical person as a personality so i could really see oh yeah some may and save some may not i'll be in that last crowd some may not but really who cares
it doesn't really matter dogan saying and suzuki roshi is certainly saying don't worry about that
i remember when i first came to practice and is probably the first time that i went to docusign and i wasn't sure about the practice and i said something to surgeon like i'm not sure this practice is for me and he said oh really
well i'm not very intellectual and he just laughed
and i said why are you happy and he said don't worry about that just practice
so i think he's staying the same thing here don't worry about you're gonna be in this group are you going to be in that group that really gets it that really
deepens
practice
just practise this is a very important point and the secret of teaching don't suppose that what we realize his knowledge in terms of concepts we have already attained supreme enlightenment that secret attainment attainment which is more
more than you understand cannot be seen by you the way it appears to you is not necessarily the same
so even though we get discouraged we should continue practicing
as you know we live in a world which is mostly perceptions it's difficult for us to be satisfied with everything when our understanding accords with what we see or think but we have to know that everything we see or think is under some limitation
you're not saying or thinking about the thing itself this point should be remembered what you see what you understand in terms of concepts is not always true this is the secret of buddhism this point should be remembered completely
so this point seems important especially ah when we consider conflict and we consider criticism
that our view is limited that our perception is limited i find this a really good reminder as someone who's highly opinionated
so don't be disturbed by the ideas you have in your mind this does not mean that you can ignore your thinking thinking should be systematic and should be right but even though it's right it's not complete
and what you think is right is not always actually write most people attached to the truth which they understand the confusion arises from this hasty understanding this is a very very important point
i think this is why open encourages us to study that self that loves to discriminate between self and other

in short the point is in our practice whether you develop your idea of self you know or you develop buddha mind
you develop buddha mind in your everyday practice is the difference and the point of weather which is buddhist practice we should always put the self you know next and buddha mind from
first we should always follow buddha mind to follow buddha mind it is necessary to realize what is buddha mind how to realize buddha mind is our zazen practice this is a good question for us to carry around her
how to realize buddha mind is our zazen practice

this takes time
right
listening paying attention to what's already there originally reminding ourselves that it's already there believing that it's already there
not looking outside ourselves
we don't need to fight we don't need to seek after
one thing that made me think about in arm in music in singing actually ah
there's a word audi eight that means you hear the note before you sing it and you can train yourself through practice in a series of certain kinds of exercises so a kind of training train yours
self to hear the note before you sing it and in singing is quite helpful when you're jumping from
you know intervals when the notes aren't close to each other so that you keep the pitch so that you're not flat or sharp but i thought oh the idea of adi aiding buddha's voice how would that be the idea of
listening
for ah the voice underneath the clutter underneath the discriminating self that's already there
ah we could practice with that image
because that place is the place that guides our actions and our speech and actually that place is where the precepts
come from they don't come from outside of us they come from that place inside us where buddha nature resides so paying attention and listening to that voice
i'm helps us to know what to do next
i'm so for example if there's something that i really want to do or something that i really want to say and i can see that it's not appropriate so i don't say it or i don't do it will then that's a moment of actual a
enlightened activity
and it's informed
buy something inside us

and the more we can access that and trade places with other people
put ourselves in other people's places move around the table and see what the perspective is like from different places
ha
the more that will help us to observe more keenly

well i think i'm going to stop because we started kind of laden i was like to hear from some of you but also sojourn is there's something that you would like to say about the game joe cohen
or the self
because it's almost eleven o'clock
no okay does anybody have a comment or question yeah he really welcome is called crystal
you might find such great flair
oh thank you very much stronger by astronomy is true from everything that you just said and the ginger calm waters something quite understand where well
well but it's absolutely true
the question i always wanted to be asking myself as
you the seems to be the cover stiffly was close with practice and
form or whatever rises and what i was to in each moment in montessori speech to me i i want to be grasping an ambitious and all those things like me
a true herself as a favor i speak to my first i do not understand when you know
when i first came in our sort of like a sip from my hands cancer selfies of not do that but be sure
but it was true and from her walls and understanding of for and death for me that came from nowhere him
it is in practice and strung on
it's it's round with wine snob
it's understanding him not understood
when you saw some oil thank you that was nicely stated
ross iraq
my understanding years since of my activities when soften other was a disappeared so why i can still see and feel the merit of whether to say something or not say something whether it's appropriate knife
that
ah field was it seems several like i'm thinking about what i should or shouldn't say even though will take into consideration the other as self and i wanted to be helped me understand
the inspiration for appropriateness of when to say when not to say now that activity is our so
yeah that i think it's something about the nature of life
language and saying it out loud like i think what you just said is true
and i don't know how to answer that except to say it
the minute we talk about it we've already ruined it so it's some place that's going to come
from ah from buddha nature from that place that's below the small cells that's going to inform the activity and the activity just comes i don't think it's so much a conscious thought even though i kind of explained it that way so maybe we can
for on together and maybe if i get intuitive sense or to say are not to safe and confidential ancient river over here will make the of office of explain yourself right and as a component
right yeah mary you're welcome
this is related
let me know
escape
the division of your separate
comment or so i'm always been in my own has been thinking and with just teaching how to study the sell
and hardly spy equipment
i couldn't actually catch yourself in reminder that one is so embedded in the perception
that it's only
recently there has recently asked the question and someone
i rely on and the answer lies he reminds us that i could and them the answer was well i'm hearing
well that's nice can hear the list of when you register minister
my as stress in your fault lines then the second
well on suzuki roshi says in one of the lectures i read that of course we see it and others
and i think that's why we practice together that's the gem of song guys in it that we inspire one another
that we see ourselves in one another
and ah what good is it to go home and sit alone
i mean it's okay it's not that it's bad but just like you said where we're seeing ourselves we're not seeing me
we're seeing ourselves and so at some point that helps us i hope
because i see it around me to be more kind
thank you and the i dearly
i'll explain his reviews
owning a fine line
the
this feeling
and
struggle with
the see myself education classes josh
i don't get active
to be enthusiastic
air
i feel my life
it comes to have my mouth
scientists
see
here are a great question on an again i think you know our practices a gradual practice to slow practice i think it takes years to on appreciate what you're talking about i to learn
to to learn that to to really learn and accept and believe that this is a comfortable posture
right that nobody's making me do it it's comfortable
and however we sit you know some of the sit in a chair and some of us sit on stools it doesn't matter but the posture itself like i think that's like the beauty of giving saws and instructions to be able to say that this is a comfortable posture and you might not be able to do it today but if you practice it
it
so that's like one part of it and then i don't know the other part of it i really
work with this idea of me mine myself i think that's related to body mind for example as a teacher when i first started teaching i used to take very personally students successes or failures and at one point as a result of this practice
i just decided to train myself not to use the words my class my students my whatever i would change it so whenever i had to talk about it or even in my head i would say thus students the class and overtime
time it made a big shift in how i viewed the relationship with the students and also on my investment in their success or failure i don't think i worked in a less but somehow it cleaned it up in some way somehow i don't know if this makes sense somehow i think that
it's related to body mind is not to take it so personally
this body
over a long period of time we get to
stop moving
just think you can feel as
when you come from
yes
difference yes yes sometimes manifest site by changing vs right idea of though
see significant you know before you said
yeah
that work for you yeah
and also like surgeon tells us to give ourselves instruction like you know even after all these years i'm sure a lot of us do that but i mean i do that my job like when i'm i love teaching english as a second language but sometimes on the way to work i don't really feel like going to work
i'd rather take a bicycle ride or whatever but like the minute i walk in the class i give myself that instruction like get with it hit home
walk in pay attention wake up forget the bicycle you know and i think that's really important just to keep giving ourselves instruction and also not to berate ourselves when leaps blow it
that also takes a long time
i don't know if it's natural are normal but we seem to all do that you know as we compare ourselves to others
yes john has something as you said you have to be clarified his in my class just the same as you good on that nice was my sister's place some other way of discussing it with retire utilized by taking their respective as an adult versions how do we go
eight views seems is the same idea as we still resided meters with he's got my bread is not my vive is what i'm experiences and as i have that experience i started to experience the breathing and salon of others and i have soon
right i have understand have something that is not my insight my understanding where it comes to the and it's also not buy firewood for the fire is just what happens in reserve
another perspective is no longer five reps no longer high class was mine me that good
scrape oh i see the strike it i just want to say thank you very much i thought somebody was gonna ask me about the president with glad nobody did