Morning. Good morning. You hear me in the back? No, no, [...] no. Thank you. What happened to your head? Neck out of. Sorry about that. This morning, we had a memorial service for Peter Brickett. One of our carpenters who helped us build this zendo and the apartments underneath the house next door and he was also a member.

[01:17]

At the time that we did this remodeling in order to turn these four buildings, these two lots, into a Zen center. Peter was quite involved. And we had a number of carpenters who were members. And the same thing happened when we were building Tassajara. When you have a project like that, mysteriously carpenters Rean Hamilton was one who is now up at Ring and Bone. Matt Peter was a wonderful fellow. And when we were going to build Zindo, he called me up one day and said, I've located some, I've told you this story before, I've located some

[02:22]

cedar, a load of cedar in a lumberyard in South San Francisco. It's third grade, all full of knots, and you know, it's not the preferred stock. It's probably the lowest grade. So we went down there and looked at it, and it was an inch and a half thick, and so we bought it. because the price was really low. And then we took it to a mill and had each board sliced in half. And we saw each board through the mill. And it was something very personal about the construction of the inside of the zender, all of the cedar. Each board I personally know by heart. And so we took the the material, the boards that had the least knots and put them in the middle.

[03:30]

And the ones with the most knots are going to the top. So you don't really know. And of course, the ceiling. So Peter was very much involved in that. But we sliced the boards because they're an inch and a half. Then there's a little less than three quarters of an inch. So the board is a little less than three quarters of an inch. And the wood is very soft, that's why I'm always careful about putting soft pieces under the chairs and stuff so that we don't rub them on the floor. So I really appreciated all of Peter's work. Even though I haven't seen him for years, I've missed him. And I think all of us who knew him miss him as well. So today, I'm going to continue with commenting on Suzuki Hiroshi's talk on resuming Big Mind.

[04:44]

Yesterday I talked about monkey mind and Buddha mind. Monkey mind being the mind that chases after peanuts and Buddha mind which goes to the essence. Someone asked me, well you talk about Buddha mind and ordinary mind. So are there two minds? Are there two people? That's an interesting question. Are there two people? Or is there one person with two, with a split personality? Kind of. Yeah, it's a kind of split personality. So our effort in practice is to bring monkey mind and Buddha mind in confluence with each other so there becomes one mind.

[06:00]

So Suzuki Roshi says, so in our practice we rely on something great and sit in that great space. So we rely on something great and sit in that great space. Of course in Buddhism we don't talk about a deity, but there are various ways of expressing that great space in Buddhism. A great space would be emptiness, but emptiness is a space. Emptiness is an unconditioned dharma. Space is an unconditioned dharma, which means it's not subject to conditions or has no special shape or form.

[07:03]

In that sense, it's emptiness. It has no special shape or form, which is also called dharmakaya. Dharmakaya is that great space which has no special shape or form and which produces all shapes and forms. All the shapes and forms are the shapes and forms of the Dharmakaya Buddha. But since everything is continually transforming and nothing stays permanent for a moment, it's all called emptiness. It's simply the realm of transformations which is called Nirmanakaya Buddha also. We say nirmanakaya buddha, nirmanakaya shakyamuni buddha. In the meal chant, literally, in Japanese, it says the innumerable shakyamuni buddhas all over the world, which means each person

[08:21]

is a Shakyamuni Buddha, potentially. So our practice, in our practice we rely on something great and sit in that space. So rely means to have confidence in something. That which we rely on is something that we have confidence in. We say to have faith or confidence. Confidence is maybe the active principle of faith. And we sit in that great space. In other words, we're totally vulnerable. In Zazen, we're totally vulnerable. If someone comes up behind us and cuts off our head, that's it.

[09:22]

There's no defense. We're totally open. If we are totally open, then we're sitting Zazen. There's nothing... Because we've totally renounced selfhood. In zazen, we totally renounce selfhood. We let go of self. So there's nothing to defend. So, between the active principle, the potential, which is dharmakaya, and the active principle, which is nirmanakaya, there's a gap. How do we reconcile the dharmakaya with the embodiment called nirmanakaya?

[10:26]

So there has to be something there. And we call that sambhogakaya. Sambhogakaya is when we talk about Buddha nature and to be to act like Buddha, to practice Buddhism, that's the Sambhogakaya Buddha. The Sambhogakaya Buddha is the one who practices. It's called the Wisdom Mind, Wisdom Body. So in our meal chant, whenever we do the meal chant, we say homage to the Dharmakaya Buddha, homage to the Sambhogakaya Buddha and homage to the Nirmanakaya Buddha. These are not just Buddhas in space. We're talking about ourself. Each one of us is the Drakaya. Each one of us embodies the three bodies.

[11:30]

So it's not just like we're two bodies. We're actually three. It's not like we're two people. We're three. There's a comment in a koan that says to walk into the Buddha hall with the three gates on top of a staff and three bodies lie down in one bed. So the three bodies are really one body, but the three aspects of our Buddha nature. Dharmakaya Vairochana Buddha. Vairochana is the Buddha which embodies the Dharmakaya. Vairochana, when we sit Zazen, we're actually Vairochana Buddha. Why are we Vairochana Buddha? Because we're simply sitting in a space

[12:36]

without duality, emanating light. We're simply opening ourselves so that light can be expressed. People say, how come you're sitting in Zazen when you can be out there marching? That's important too. Bringing light to the world allowing light to flow into the world when there's so much darkness, suppressing the light is the most valuable thing, I think. Because the light that emanates from this practice extends everywhere and has its influence which we can't trace, but you can see it. So, and vairagchana, dharmakaya vairagchana, it's like a mandala of light which is expressed in all directions.

[13:52]

Sambhogakaya, lochana buddha, lochana buddha is amida. But lochana buddha is also called the lamp buddha, also expressing light. any Buddha is expressing light. That's what Buddhas do. They express light. They are a channel for light. Nirmanakaya Buddha is Shakyamuni, the one who brings the practice to the world. So when we, each one of us is in a sense, Shakyamuni Buddha bringing practice to the world. So we say, the sixth ancestor says, Dharmakaya is your nature, true nature.

[14:58]

Sambhogakaya is your wisdom. Nirmanakaya is your activities, your actions. So, how come there are three? Well, because Dharmakaya and Sambhogakaya need something to bring them together. And that's the role of Sambhogakaya. Nirmanakaya and Dharmakaya need something to bring them together. That's the role of Sambhogakaya. Sambhogakaya has two faces. One face faces dharmakaya, the other face faces nirmanakaya. And this is called complete practice. In contrast to what's called hinayana practice, the reason that Trikala was created was because in a hinayana practice, nirmanakaya

[16:07]

and Dharmakaya are separated. In other words, the Hinayana practice means to eliminate, to actually get out of the world. To eliminate all the problems, so you don't have any problems anymore, and you're out of the world, never returning. So, Bodhisattva practice is in the midst of the problems of the world, you find the truth without escaping. This is Sambhogakaya Buddha. To find within all of our problems, release through practice. And it's much more difficult rather than escaping from our problems This is why we say this is not a self-improvement practice.

[17:11]

It's a practice of simply facing our problems and finding within each problem release or emptiness. This is the practice of the Heart Sutra. Avalokiteśvara, when coursing in the Prajnaparamita, perceived that all the five skandhas are empty. It's not like we should eliminate the five skandhas. We have to find the emptiness within the five skandhas, within all of our activity, which is to find the truth within our activity without escaping. So, Suddhikari Rasi says, in our practice we rely on something great, Dharmakaya Buddha, and sit in that great space. of Vairagyana Buddha. The pain you have in your legs or some other difficulty is happening within that great space. As long as you do not lose the feeling that you have that you are in the realm of Buddha nature, you can sit even though you have some difficulty.

[18:24]

When you want to escape from your difficulty and when you try to improve create another problem for yourself. But if you just exist there, then you have a chance to appreciate your surroundings and you can accept yourself completely without changing anything. And this is our practice. To exist in big mind is an act of faith which is different from the usual faiths of believing in a particular idea or being. When we studied the subject of faith a while back, I presented two aspects of faith. One is doctrinal faith and the other is patriarchal faith. Doctrinal faith is the study or idea of faith that someday... Buddha is outside of myself.

[19:32]

Like God is out there and I'm here. Patriarchal faith is, I am Buddha. We are, each one of us is Buddha. There's no Buddha to become or to long for. supporting all of our activities, including thinking mind and emotional feelings. All these things are supported by something big that has no form or color, and we call it emptiness. It is impossible to know what it is, but something is there, something that is neither material nor spiritual. Suzuki, as you This is just a practice of reality.

[20:35]

Spiritual is still on this side. Spiritual and material are just two aspects of something on this side. They're just two ways of thinking about our practice because mundane and spiritual are one thing. even though there are two aspects. So we don't really call this a spiritual practice. It's not a spiritual practice, but it's not a quote-unquote spiritual practice. There's something on the other side which is what he's talking about, and he doesn't call that spiritual. is neither material nor spiritual. Something like that always exists and we exist in that space. That is the feeling of pure existence.

[21:40]

Pure existence is neither spiritual nor material. Spiritual... If you divorce... This is the practice of Hinayana. Hinayana is kind of a spiritual practice. Divorcing from material practice. But to actually experience material practice as material practice is spiritual practice. So, it's so easy to divide. It's so easy to fall into duality. We do it all the time. The hardest thing is to not allow ourselves to fall into duality. Duality exists and we have to We do live in a dualistic world, but with a non-dualistic understanding. That's why our practice seems so, sometimes, unspectacular.

[22:48]

We don't try to create some special feeling or some special spiritual attitude. to find the spiritual within the mundane activities of life is true practice. Sweeping the ground is great spiritual practice. Washing the dishes is enormously great spiritual practice. Cleaning the toilets is great spiritual practice. He says, If you are brave enough to throw yourself into Zazen for several days, a little bit of understanding will help your rigidity and your stubbornness. Almost all the problems you create because of your stubbornness, excuse me, stubborn mind will vanish. Hopefully. Really good. If you have even the smallest understanding of reality, your way of thinking will change completely.

[24:04]

And the problems you create will not be problems anymore. We have to realize that most of the problems we have are problems that we create. We look outside, you know, and think that the world is creating problems for us. The world is creating conditions and the way we relate to those conditions creates problems for us. So our practice is about how to relate to the conditions so that we don't create problems for ourselves and others. Problems through greed, ill will and delusion. It is also true that as long as we live, we will have problems. So problems are actually our treasure. Without problems, we can't practice. You may think, well, if I don't have any problems, that's pretty good.

[25:09]

I don't have to practice. You don't have any problems. You already made it. We don't practice Zazen to attain some big enlightenment that will change our whole being or solve all our problems. That is not the right understanding. That may be what people call Zen, but true Zen is not like that. In Sashin, we concentrate on having the experience of true practice, forgetting all about any idea of gaining anything. We just sit here. If this room is too cold, we'll make it warm. And if your legs become painful, you can stretch them. Be very kind. Usually you would say, don't move. And people would say, I can't move.

[26:10]

Don't move doesn't mean you can't move. And if it is too difficult, you can rest. But let's continue our practice for these seven days. Just do your best. Just do the best you can. Make a big effort. But if you make too much effort, you tire yourself out. If you don't make enough effort, you wonder what you're doing here. You just be like a lump. There are some meditation practices where People are just being passive. But I don't think our zazen is not a meditation practice in that sense. There is a passive aspect, but there is also an active aspect. The active aspect is to sit up straight and put all your effort into sitting straight and paying attention.

[27:17]

to, as I said yesterday, to keep surveying all the aspects of your posture. I didn't talk about breath, but if you simply are passive, there's something missing. My feeling about Zazen is We're sitting in this great space and how do we let go of our, how do we renounce or let go of self, which is not true self, but false self, built up self, conditioned self, conditioned habit, which is covering our true self. How do we let go of that? By becoming smaller, we actually become bigger.

[28:31]

The smaller we get, the bigger we are. That's a fact. Because the smaller we are, the smaller our self is, the bigger our true self. So we sit in this, that's what we mean by sitting in this great space. The space becomes endless, even though we're sitting in the most confined space. We find the biggest freedom within the confined space. So, make the effort to sit still. Don't move. But if you have to move, move. But if you do, don't say, I'm sorry.

[29:38]

Don't say, oh shoot. Don't say, excuse me. Just do it. There's no blame. Most important thing is to not judge yourself. Judging yourself is simply small mind. Buddha will take care of you, even if you make a mistake. So I wrote something about here one time. In some book, a kaya is sometimes called the enjoyment body. Enjoyment means enjoying the gift of Buddhahood.

[30:45]

To see the enjoyment body means to see the essence body, which is dharmakaya, The transformation body, which is nirmanakaya, to see the essence body in the transformation body, in other words, in the most mundane activities, to realize that it's dharmakaya, that's samogakaya. Sambhogakaya realizes the oneness of Dharmakaya and Lumangakaya. When we have that realization, it's called enlightenment. This is why I really like to have work period in the machine.

[31:52]

People There are a lot of people who just like to have Sashin just sitting. No toys. But I like toys. I think that work period in Sashin gives us the opportunity to practice that concentrated, that wide concentration. of Zazen in activity. It's really the two sides. How do you enjoy doing something with your body moving? It doesn't matter what you're doing. When we have the samadhi of Zazen, then when we do the work period, we have the samadhi It's wonderful to get that experience.

[32:55]

Coming back to the very beginning, you were talking about the old carpenter. The old carpenter? The old carpenter. Actually, he was rather young. Really? Yeah. Yeah. He was, I think, in his 30s. When he was doing it. But now he's in his 60s, or he was in his 60s, or maybe 70s. Yeah. Yeah. My question has to do with what happens to old Zen students. Because we don't see a lot of... We see people come in, and we see them leave. Well, you know, I always see, from the beginning, my understanding, my feeling was, this is a place where people come and get something, I don't want to say get something, and practice for a while, and then they move on. Some people stay a long time and move on.

[34:22]

Some people stay a short time and move on. That's life. If everybody came here and stayed, that would be very strange, actually. For me, I see things a little differently because my field of practice is much wider. You know, if you look at the people I've given dharma transmission to, most of them are not here. But they're my old students. Most of them are my old students. And they've been avatars of Zen Center, and they're current avatars of Zen Center, my dharma heirs. You know, those students are practicing far and wide. So to me, they're actually doing something. And so that's very gratifying for me. So not everybody will stay that long, but the practice stays with people.

[35:25]

Often people say, you know, I don't come around anymore, but I'm really glad that you're there. Just something about the practice being here reassures people, gives them some reassurance, even though they've gone on to different activities. And who knows who's practicing and who's not? Sometimes somebody can come here every day and not be practicing. And sometimes somebody will come for a while and go someplace and they're really practicing. You can't say, you can't make that judgment. And I think that people leave is good because it spreads the darkness. when people leave. And they may just be in business or, you know, working someplace, doing something, going to school. But there's something about having embodied the practice that spreads the field.

[36:33]

So I don't feel bad. I feel good about that. So that's what I've always expected, is that people would actually go on. Not everybody would stay here. And the size of this place somehow limits the number of people who practice it. It's a kind of self-limiting space. So we can handle just so many people in an intimate way. When it gets too big, it's hard to practice with the teachers in an intimate way. That's why people like to go to Tosahara, because you're just there for three months, practicing with each other, and nobody's going anywhere. And they can be very intimate. But, you know, like at Page Street, it's not as intimate. Zen Sen is so big, it's harder to be intimate with the students.

[37:36]

So we see each other, you know, a lot, and we have an intimate practice. Not too many people. I have a question, because I find it very helpful to hear that phrase from Suzuki Roshi, that trying to improve your practice is not the way. But then also, so often I hear things like, if you're doing da-da-da-da, then you are sitting zazen. That is good zazen. you can improve your practice. It's different than improving yourself. I can do better.

[38:39]

I can practice better than I'm doing now. That's not self-improvement. That's improving my practice. Do you understand the difference? It's one thing to say, I can do better. And to say, I want to get, I want to better myself in order to, you know, be better. I feel like I get in a loop very often of, is this good practice? Is this good practice? No, no, no, I've got to do this whole thing. No, I've got to do it. What about this? That's why you should come to Dogasan. We were talking about how describing our practice as spiritual doesn't really quite capture what we do in our practice, and the more I practice

[39:49]

is because it's a word people understand. I mean, not that they understand it, but it's a word that when you say meditation, it points to something. If you say Zazen, people say, well, and then it's hard to explain Zazen. So we just say meditation. And then if they want to know what that meditation is, then you can And I wanted to say that what brought this up for me is that the other day a friend of mine told me that she just became a meditation instructor. She took a class, and she got a certificate. So when I asked her what kind of meditation she did, she said, well, she plays the soft music, and she has people close around. And it's very good. It's a good self-improvement thing, because it's relaxing for people who are very busy. But I was thinking, well, if that's meditation,

[41:15]

because other than simply letting go of self-centeredness. But I said, well, that's kind of what we're doing too. And in a sense, you know, it is. But I think when someone asks you, you should just say, well, sit down and I'll show you. That's the best way. Instead of trying to explain it, just say, well, sit down and I'll show you. You can do that. That question reminded me of a question I had yesterday. So it reminded me of a question I had yesterday when you were talking about monkey mind and that people want to get rid of monkey mind. And that in some meditation practices you get rid of monkey mind rather than actually appreciating monkey mind and also

[42:27]

learning from monkey mind what your habits of mind are, what your patterns are, and what your traps are. Yeah, but without getting caught by monkey mind. Yeah. Without getting fascinated by it, and very interested in it, but using it as a way to understand your... Well, that's why, that's Sambhogakaya. Sambhogakaya is practicing the monkey mind. Not trying to get rid of something, but finding a way through monkey mind. Actually. By... I can't explain it, but... Realizing this is monkey mind. Well, it's the same peanut. you know, appears. And you go grabbing at it.

[43:31]

That's right. Yeah. Shall I eat the peanut? What shall I do with the peanut? Do I want to walk down this path again? That's right. So, yeah, practice is to look at the peanut and what do I do with the peanut? There's something in Chuang Tzu about monkey mind called two in the morning three in the afternoon, there was a group of monkeys, and the keeper said, I'll give you two peanuts in the morning and three in the afternoon, and the monkeys all got very, very upset. And so the keeper said, no, no, I'll give you three in the morning and two in the afternoon, and the monkeys were all very happy. You were talking about what you call Hinayana. Yes. And I was thinking of our friends at Spirit Rock who sort of in that tradition, but they don't seem to fit the description you were giving.

[44:38]

They seem to emphasize compassion and present moment mindful awareness at all times in the body. They don't seem to be teaching about popping off into escape, you know, escaping from the world. So I wondered who you meet. Well, I don't call that Yin-Yang. Yin-Yang is an attitude. It's not a school. And besides, just talking about Buddhism, present day practitioners in the world pretty much have a similar understanding. But in the olden days, that was the division. It kind of belongs to the olden days, but it's still an attitude. Mel, at Tassajara you told a story about the left hand and the right hand, and what happens when they come together.

[45:42]

And I wonder if you could tell that again. Well, yeah, I talk about that here a lot. But I'll talk about it again. You know, we have the six worlds. The heavenly world, the fighting demons, the animal world, the human world, the praetor, the hungry ghost. And we have the Buddha world, Bodhisattva world, the Sravaka world, Pratyekabuddha world, and the Deva world. So this is like spiritual world, and this is like mundane world, right? And so this is Sambhogakaya.

[46:45]

It's one world. It's not divided into spiritual or mundane. That's the end of my talk.

[47:01]

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