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BZ-02742
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thank you i question well
oh
the i just wanna say that i really
i'm really happy about the way we've been holding her practice ah these last couple of months
w whatever returned to make it work together so that's
i can't say no please the ham the way
a this the for testino because it's hi hi you when every ship when all your dependencies are over or in the background how do you practice
so i think we're done really well and we're learning how to do that and actually every is a different way of dealing with are we always a practicing and so on
ah i really want you feel that i recognize your own the avenue the dead bodies making it really only together really well
so given that ah
susan
you mean first
please ask the questions you have something say
surgeon roshi
there's always not knowing every day there's not knowing but right now we're more acutely aware of knowing that we don't know
somehow
so how do we practice with that new
understanding of not knowing
well you know
the know
you know ah
oh no not know it means that we need a remote every moment and a fresh way
you need every circumstance in a fresh way it's called or nothing had nothing held in the bedroom the heart
oh without preconceptions even though you know many things and we have lot of information still
a to beat everything with nothing at the bedroom of the heart
oh and see everything at just as it is this is called the great round mirror with them
that's how we practice the great round euro wisdom and are like it's not just the term are the intellectual ah idea of the somebody father and candidate but
the mirror reflecting everything just as it is without an interference
so this is our practice to see everything just as is which is really hard
because we always have some preconceptions about somebody or whatever we need and in many ways that's important
overseas things are important but fundamentally with the button most important is how to be everything without preconceptions
oh it's hard to do that will be in the us we can make everything without a pre-cut breathe without preconceptions
if much harder when were facing our daily life and busy life
so but even so
as possible so this is what recover our practice to see everything to make the possible to get beyond our preconceptions and see everything new at each moment
i'm
and what do we rely on nothing i knew you were gonna say that of andros
do you know
i'm
we give ourselves over to
ah our mother earth
and my brother will take care of us
no one were born
oh what we enter
oh this the the world of breath and water
ah
we're totally helpless and what are we rely on
we rely on her mother
or whatever serves as their mother and as we grow up as we age
we rely on various other things besides i murdered but it actually whatever when the lamb with our mother's
do you think about it
my mother takes various forms
takes the form of food drink sleep activity ideas and support
and we depend on those things
and then we live a certain amount of years
ah and if we know what practices return ourselves over to escort faith is called her mother
when we say i have great trade lynch
that are we rely on another which is the universe
must have room in the universe a big cosmic children of the universe
and we're like on that
so that's why a boy reached by mind open
we live ah
a good nature which is her mother take over
i'm
the suzuki roshi this shouldn't talk about that
it is picked a dozen is like putting herself back in her mother's arms
and this time
is the kind of test you keep saying
for what a test to see what we will depend on
so we turned our some over
and then on the universe which is a of provides everything
force
so i but without that trust
ah it's hard to see loves because
to if push comes to show we start to rely on something else
and that is a problem when push comes to show we may say all i rely on you know patterson and for him subway faith in brighton but when the coast push deserved we reach for something else
but if you don't reach for something else then you find yourself and not knowing
not knowing is the highest because return it all over
aam aadmi hunters that's called the inner direction
the universe provides her direction
cause that's what it's always done he didn't he didn't ask to be worn in you were born helpless
and then we add
it all ends
so ah a murmuring panda can trust
ah we have a happy ending
oh good
oh we don't know radar doubt we do not know
not knowing so to trust
just the pupils or what do you have frasier
just have a fence or does not miss anything
because everything is so far you have no control over you have some kind of control over something but does a minor controls major controls we have no no control over every day you age you have no control that
and we by by and larger men finally we don't watch anymore
and so like ah
what do you cling to what do you hold onto
nothing
it just is
it's like breathing
shut your breathed you do not breed is your fault
is not your fault
it just happens to blood falling through the is nine o'clock
what is your father's talking too much more
i really like to work i decided to stay i don't know your elections thank you so nourishing reuters is
okay i got my next my next question trust in or is randy and retry mute you randy
before you start
i can find you in the list here you are
i don't see your pick
asked the unmute and in know why it doesn't let me on mute unmute you and only says asked to unmute other she is i iran the saw to draw the shapes early
heard
sorry to be like
thirty right
and my question is
ty cloud can you hear me such as yes a sigh clown floods locusts earthquakes and a pandemic what is alive
what is a life or like what is alive
it's all life it's all alive it's all of life right now there's a big surge in the life of locusts
is the they get was said to africa unedited in india
big ones they're more vigorous
you know what they would rather live
then they would rather be alive and then they wish about us and we would rather be left i wish about them
police of
that they have the you know like just eats itself this isn't isn't between about it that we don't like
you like what we need but we don't like to be eaten
jackie clegg great the by to be drunk i mean
oh everything's eating everything else that's the that's the role here where a hundred
that's life
life is what we don't like your definition of like it's lot we don't like
we welcome thank you section with more than that but
that agree with your question for me given you a question that's given my question at the answer yes
thank you searching
turn the europe now on dec
take explosion rogic was isn't an inquiry reading in mh i pad with you mean yourself or carry with you mute
but what the him and residual sound duties on everybody na okay k entering okay charlie thank you so did russia
thank you she's so for doing this i'd imagine this is a furnished in the history of our practice this well it's not exactly a practice period it was a
but i agree with your tight
gary was to be the shoe so for proposed future practice period will be starting and know
i of that very sorry about that he will be even do that
but on
ah what's your question by question surgeon is about something you talk about many times that i really do not understand and that is
seeing the capacity of seeing
the seeing include the other sense organs hearing touches etc
or not
oh well we see with our eyes we see what our ears but we call it hearing and we see with our touch but we call it touching and we see with our nose we call it smelling and so forth
how about our small mind to a city with that unfortunately yes
we see with our small mind which is necessary in the dualistic way but i might is always in a dualistic under do this to control
and it's very hard to see the wonders of duality
without
discriminated
you see when you we say i know that's discrimination didn't you say i know you're a kid including something in excluding something
it says aroused openness to seeing so true saying is no city
god i've several whenever we see is discriminated
we that that's what discrimination means of dividing this criminal
so ah a winner
we're always discriminate does to work with or my desert with soon as we start thinking were discriminating to that's why it's good that things in for a long time from time to time i and
and from time-to-time that's recent thousand so that from time to time without say anything and we don't think thing and we just being present with what is
without yeah
i couldn't agree with more with you i've covered a repeated that the judge a sort of the a spiritual vacation
it's i'm taking a rest we call it guess
oh yeah
when i say a true thing is no saying that i see its senses
thank you so much so we welcome
a bet your next allen meet you
and okay such a rushing
i can hear you but i can't see you
well i just a second row will fix that sure the you are okay
such a rushing
according to my understanding our practice is about
i'm turning towards our experience and ah
i'm being present in our life
but at times and repeated times in my life i i have moments where i feel
quite overwhelmed and as if his human life is pretty difficult to bear and at these moments sometimes i find myself wanting to turn away from my experience or hide or even give up and at those times what do i do
keep going
after going
november cut years ago she used to say ah we have to bear the unbearable
this comes thrown his japanese experience of the war you know the japanese last award which was a the most unbearable thing that they could possibly think of people commit suicide you know rather than give up
ah so ah
it's great fortitude fortitude is people say it sometimes said oh you know zealand just come on
for the heavenly say that
yeah
you try and make life difficult for yourself
we don't have to try it will be done you're invited difficult enough for us but
ah of an endurance contest that's what i'm thinking
the and tested in torrance contest
as if that's bad but actually it's good
life is an endurance contest we don't the requested my life is to endure until we die
well so it's a kind of contradiction of life as a kind of contradiction
where restraint with hugs and can't live and that but it's all going to die

so yes it's an endurance contest and europe middle of it know and we create our own problems ah and then we have to figure out how utterly door
i'm but
yeah when you don't know what to do it just keep going
also take a rest sometimes taking a rest new it's good i remember when i was you know
beginning my practice and i had love problems
and
you know probably all i can do is walk around the block and orange just take long walks with something ah day after day you know but there doesn't off i can do what do you do when does that lc can do well is it were a cut down on drop out and can't do that
because delight our life is about motivation
play it's about moving
that's moving and doing
ah
so
we set ourselves up
to around
have attained something
but in the midst of the setting over web to attain something we create a problem
so we have to deal with that problem and that practice and during even no matter what's going on
right what what i did when that was happening i would sit thousand every day twice a day i would say that and that setting doesn't watch today is what helped me to the door
because i could see that there were two things what was being and the other was doing
can it's a the love should just be without worrying about the doing but what motivated to do
so it's good to take that break of just being because that's enough
hey
and when we lose our
our resolve or energy or motivation to practice it
just keep moving
yeah that's the time that's the great test of practice
but that does it strengthen your practiced
cowshed the truth be that once you start to practice you can never stop
no matter what you think
he hopes you go away for twenty years you can't stop
why because it's the truth about your life
thank you certain locum pancake compare your next on deck that me new you are
i ask you to unmute yourself
hi i sorted sorry i'm late i had been of a technical difficulty ah
well first of i just wanted a
i thank you and a community
for his grey support on
what one thing that
what was the positive thing that came out of this whole ah
shelter and places ah
i meditate regularly now especially at it out in the evenings ah which has been very very helpful
am
ah
what you said a couple weeks ago about ah
how to remember

kabir you're cut out your voice
cam chimes of a yeah okay so many mentioned about discipline when i asked about
how do you how do we remember our breath and a storm of emotions or anger ah you said something about discipline and i was very helpful ah what i've been doing as oh when when i'm not ah
feeling you know angry or none of them and the storm of emotions i tried to recall my breath
or pay attention to it when days are good when take the com when things are okay and and one do things get all a shaky and saw easier to
to get to to to to call or do you don't come back to the breath
i had done
as interesting dream or night and
oh i was saying i gotta roughage to buddha dharma sangha and then also us thousand i heard said i got off to my actions and i wanted to know what's your take on that
going going for refuge to our actions

and your bearded hung on a second you kicker can you run mute sergeant some reason as if okay florida
i might have done that by mistake
it's like
if you opt for everything to buddha
then everything is a okay
but you know you said i take refuge borough but infiltrate and then you go back to your stuff yeah elena it and so you offer your stuff hurry to how you take refuge in buddha is to offer all your stuff to do that
but it will take over
what does that mean that buddha will take care of it means you're trusting yourself
oh actually everything is ok
we think it's not okay but everything is ok
can be better
so as yes you can make it better but first of all you have to be able to say oh yeah everything is okay because here it is and this is where it is
well okay now what am i do so you come back to to coming back to broader wins to the offer at all to agreement it's all ok okay it's all ok and now what do i do instead of it's not okay what am i do which was narrow
okay you'll never find out what what to do
so it's gonna be okay everything is ok just as it is now although i do so you you're going from pessimism to optimism
you want to stay in the realm of optimism or or neutrality
madden you know is a synthesis not okay the news your footing
you lose your centered so you just come back to your center all the time you live in your center you don't live up there you live in your center and then everything you do comes from that place that's called faith in yourself and in buddha
so yes come back to agree
come back to breath certain maintain a calm mind you can't do any anything you know if if you're in a in a fight or a desperate situation you can't operate from their situation you can only operate from the situation of cognis to come back to your breath
and like old everything just like them that's very good
try and take a deep breath from always preached from you
make a practice of always breathing me just say this but
deep in your gut that's where your practice counting on that's where your breath is that's where you when you solve all your problems
when i say solve all problems
the beans you know how to care of them are you make an effort to care of them
ah
from near centered
what what about
taking action taking refuge to our actions you know
well yeah let's of your actions are all aimed at being buddha
all of your actions that it what would go to do that better
killer bush you know what not produce soup
but that's true what would you come back to i am buddha what shall i do it now that i bought it

and we'll hook sort of the hockey but it's true it is perfect
thank you thank you
linda
filler yeah
okay yes
the names or it cut
now you said doesn't isn't
rest can rest in your mind yes
sounds like such a good idea
doesn't just like that i've been sitting more regularly now new areas i have was before
i it's not restful of though mostly it's it sir
and even now i was coming here to meet you are
ah but i didn't feel i can find my sincerity and i opened hard
i can experience lot of fluttering and a lot of
strange action over here and now
i don't tell it
maybe be this is about as sincere as i can get on but
it doesn't feel very open hearted
what about that too as i never think about those next
a witness
i never think about for instance i just think now i'm going to sit and already been said build with soon so now i'm gonna beat the zonda i never think about any of those things
that's because my mind is open and but that cluttered with looking for
on things all those too
so if i say
good evening sojourn this
that's something similar way little flurry art and a little bit of a desert chopped up frontal lobe and couldn't really have a good question for you but it's nice to see you
as those it what you bring forth or is a question
where you bring forces
on the question of what do i depend on
where's my bottom line
that's your question
have i see it
so the pit
i don't know you know if you want to have calmness of mind baby you do maybe you don't i don't know
but
i'm
i think your mind threatens you
threatened did you certain threatens you and yours cut little bit afraid of it
it can be scary that mind yeah
it's a bit scared of so you know i would like to say that we all love you very much worse you're happy and not worried about auditioning at all
it's that what i was really asking for again i know know
you are
anyway got me well as that's good thank you you're welcome us
okay next that is karen de curtis
so you know she i can't see you yet but i think you'll come into view soon hi i see you in a little box he's mute it again yeah know what's with this i accept the be hitting meeting my teacher
eric surgeon
that is correct yes hi i don't know why that's happening
it doesn't matter it's just happening and we fix it so so far as the far so good so far so good so hi i've just been on zoom for almost three solid months and it ends i'm certain themes have come up
and about my practice you know that saying you know it cause i learned it from you when you are used than is then
oh he's frozen for me now he's completely frozen
anyway that phrase i used to never understand it now i sort of understand it but i haven't realized then
so
i'm my question is about being authentic and i have found to this zoom experience that i feel very much like
i used to think i was very authentic because i had all these feelings and having feelings made me authentic but in fact i feel like i present a lot i present
i don't know if i'm really being myself i don't know if sanders then because they don't know if i am me so
it's like categories to books returning to silence and then you have to say something
so
i want to learn our i my question is about how to express myself not from presentation but from
being real being present
presenting
you know you were you're gone for a while the door you you were gone for hawk hill
get our local well for okay well whatever really
say something yeah that's it
i said it's kind of like between categories to books returning to silence and you have to say something yes and the part where i have to say something
even in this moment it's like i'm am i am i really am i really being me is then released then or might just presenting and you know and it bothers me that's the horizon don't worry about a just review
honestly don't worry about just i don't worry about those things
i know i got that when you talk to linda i got that you don't worry about it and i know you don't worry about it but i still have to bring my questions to you i know i'm
this is it to so and see my own lives but i think it's real for you i think you have a kind of faith that i think
this these last few months have tested my face because i've been seeing myself all the time on the zoom meetings and i am
it's just sort of closed in on me so
can't get some freshness to who i am somehow i see an offer is like linda said it's like i don't know that i'm here with a full compassionate heart although i feel compassion i'm not called the action desert well i understand what you're saying okay
i have to save your great
you look marvelous darling a pretty fun filled with bubble is stolen
honestly well as and that's really what i'm going for right were yes and what i thought when i first saw your picture and so that saw you on here a boy is she really looks great who like better better over time you know
i have i have gotten to
or sometimes i barely a boeing mad but knowing what to say before giving a lecture
but i'll think about those things i just think know
put some video by mind
and then i just open my mouth never comes out and it's up there in you yes it's all there in and he shouldn't worry so much about your delivery of care about any of those things is said don't even think about what you're gonna say
and just trust that it will come out your mouth
what pm things do come out of my mouth skin use keep good talks
i know who taught by you that when and when you are issue so you get great talks

you know it's there if it's not there he won't come out if it's their own come up but you have to trust that it's there after practicing for thirty forty years
yes thank you and i think the thing the many things you said tonight that feel inspiring the one is about face that it's not their space in anything there's just face
i think when i remember that the question i brought falls away yes
because i can't really i can't really control how what you're seeing is
right
road but i always have had great faith in you
that's why i ordered you that's why transmitted you
for which i'm very grateful thank you
the delicate a practice
what would you can i put to tender my practice
cricket europe okay the surgeon
you i don't see you yet oh i'm dumb i bought and forth
right now i see you go
could you say something and bat ah
how it is to trip to want a practice generosity at a time when he feels like the need is so overwhelming that it's easy to get flooded with all of you know serve all of what we see all of the rick
puertas and self-worth and at the same time i you know that to speaking for myself with you know that dirt you know i i i i give and then i also and other times feel at constriction out of insecurity like what like
i go back and forth between could i give more like even enough and men way you know but what if something happens to me and i don't want to be in a position where i needed something and and i think this time of and secure you know of a baby a heightened know
baroness both of privilege of how much i actually do rob relative to you know sort of what my circumstances could be makes me in a wanted to give it as much as i can but then fear comes in
and i'm you know and and i don't usually misses usually a big problem for me but during this period of the pandemic i seem to feel much more overwhelmed by by this was the is the fear of being overwhelmed
know it gets more herbert ah
i think as is the uncertainty and that the not knowing you know right let's there and i want to give in these various ways but
what happens if i lose my own ability to take care of myself well then you have to allow for of the can configure your just like you take her rubbish it's like as runway yeah i thought i find really import i mean i mean to me know the world and sword the third nov but
the it's like giving people the opportunity you think as from your point of view uses people taking silk road too many difficult for people on the other hand has given the opportunity to do something
that which they appreciate
the friends should appreciate that target they will want to do that but we feel well don't know i can picture was over everyone who posts on here is that kind of flexibility in the most important thing
flexibility and flexible mine a flexible body of flexible attitude is most important thing which means that you're left know that means that the research
after you're willing to work with what's going on and instead of having richard ideas about how it should be a how you're gonna feel how other people are gonna feel for the future just think care the president that if you have and warm hearted generous spirit
that's all you need and then what what comes to you you can take care of what does annoy comes to you can pick her up so you turn take care of wouldn't can take her into and pick her up result if you don't take care of yourself you're making it harder for people
so things like
you know it's all interwoven our life is interwoven with our actions that are on our feelings or thoughts and everybody who will come in contact with
so how did you move
flexibly through all the dreams to whatever is going on then and submission to be overwhelmed one thing about being overwhelmed instead you are free to take care of yourself
hmm
we should take care of yourself as a part as in this february he would take care of other people should be generous to yourself and janet generosity just generosity period
so why shouldn't you be generous to yourself
you're missing something
otherwise
so taking care of yourself makes it easy for own people the little help take care of them
yeah anyway to you have a generous spirit and the want to really help everybody you meet him but there's a limitation said story you can do it but if you have the generous spirit if not a matter of deeds necessarily it's about
the new york
a just being herself to helping other people because of reduced spirit without doing something special
this is how our practice permeated the world i think that
you know
oh
the and pandemic
ah we are home
demonstrating how do how to practice during this time with his thing
that's our practice how do we take care of ourselves i believe character country roads around the tabloid make a home
at the i am example about four people her do that when they see you can do that than they think well i can do that too
this carrier i think about it just practicing
knowing how to practice
in this situation of confinement is helping people
without you even thinking about it
to follow your example because our the vibes from our
ever laid into the world
unknown to us
necessarily someone worth a little words and symbols alive
thank you search and total take a turn
the last run or less the questioners kicker
thank you
ha
well i i feel really privileged to me in your presence and i would just wanna say that you're so i just wonderfully light to so light hearted and lights in your body and i'm in your face a very kris kringle you know
so i just wanna know how you make honey honey you stay so lighthearted so wonderfully light hearted
home
it's just my response to the world moon
the third car
i'm not worried about anything
i'm not worried about myself particularly i'd take a try to take care of myself you know
but ah i just enjoy everything i'm doing
until enjoy amateur by i remember when i thought about the dog during my life how i'm gonna handle
oh i always felt a bill to be a hundred and twenty
but that there probably won't happen
oh and then i always thought that i would just sit by that totally
you know just not slow down hundred we are just some you know what reminiscing your whatever to just live it already am
ah and so that that's always been my editor
and i don't worry about the past although i have a lot of remorse about casting his way
i'm happy about it you know and started person and i'll repeat that shit something high button
joelle
ah you know as you get at when your baby not only say you know and and you can see everything just as it is and then when you get cause you get all you need unique his props in the need to find ways to support your self in your ideas and you know body you know up
and the pretenders you get a certain age the big issue gavin good practice me you don't become childlike
he don't become childish and but you become child like
so i'm popular again somehow segue into my child brightness than ah
i'm enjoying the yeah i can see that him well i i am be because met at some point my life i decided that my life would be based on love rather than anything else

i finished a that a lot
oh we haven't we had a little hiccup here with the video and around
yeah you need just stay you know i kind of got a little bit of a rise like i know where we lost them we lost that we lost communication and you just stay right there is the same energy pulsing and then somebody said what happened and you said what happened ah you said it doesn't matter what happened
it's happening so that answered all my questions
that answers all my questions it doesn't matter what happened it's just what's happening
i've been watching com the series and on public television seven zero seven
a video of the roosevelts
and during franklin's term
oh
ah he also knew that the war was coming but the other hard time convincing people in america that the word europe was driven over oil button and then when it happened he was the common person in the room
an author his tenure he was always become as burden in the room
the and leveled
how can i remember it to on love your how can i remember to love everybody
is he just he don't love everybody is just the body love know him

surging that's the final questioner if you wanted to say a little closing statement for life was by clothing okay
a
when you wanna open it to more people are know what i you know it's been almost an hour right
yeah
oh oh
i would say if i do her it will be two questions
because otherwise it get a little other hand
i think it's going to to
keep it and to earth
poker commitment
olin think about it and and see what turns up for another one
i would like maybe wicked
i said is an earth is is someone else would like as question
i didn't get that i'm sure we could say is there someone else who would like to ask who burning to ask a question
user earning to ask a question you rotten lung has his hand up rocks okay
can it be unmarried him
i thought you know your body my question to you is am
when i see on the screen here is a projection and when i had a good fortune to see you in person is a projection is irina place
no
everything is a projection everything in your bike is a french action whether it's what's for dinner buffets couldn't okay we lived in the world and projections
that we do thank you very much if you