Well, today is the first week of the new year, 1995. And we had a nice New Year's Eve party, sitting Zazen, last weekend. And then we said, I said to everybody, Happy New Year. At the end of Zazen, I said, Happy New Year. And we say that to each other, you know, every time you see it, we say, oh, Happy New Year. And when we write these cards, we say, Happy New Year, Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year. But what do we mean when we say, Happy New Year? Often it's just a kind of a wish thrown out into the four winds.

[01:22]

What do we mean by happy? And what do we really wish to each other? And what do we really wish for ourselves? Today, I want to talk a little bit about happiness or joyfulness. In this undulating world, this restless world, I think the characteristic of this world is restlessness and movement and we try to find some happiness in this place where nothing is very stable and as soon as we have some stability

[02:45]

the rug is pulled out from under our feet and we have to find a new stability. As Suzuki Roshi used to say that in our life everything is continually falling out of balance. Moment by moment everything is falling out of balance. and regaining a new kind of balance or a new place to stand. So, moment by moment, we have to find a new place to stand and a new relationship with everything around us. And this seems to be the work of our life. The momentary work of our life is to find our balance and our relationship to everything around us, moment by moment.

[03:57]

Things seem to stay the same, but that's rather illusory. They're not the same from moment to moment. Everything is changing, including ourself. So, when we try to hold on to ourselves, when we try to hold on to something, some situation or some mode that we like, or that seems stable, doesn't work. Something works for a while. Some things seem more stable than others. But actually, in the long run, nothing works. So, we have to find our life, moment by moment.

[05:10]

Renew our life, moment by moment. And life is self-creating. According to Buddha Dharma, Our life is self-creating. Each one of us, from the beginningless beginning to the endless end, is creating our own destiny through our actions and our understanding. So we are who we are because of who we are. And we keep perpetuating our identity through our activity, through the way we approach life. And what we put forth is what comes back to us, even though it's hard to understand.

[06:11]

Buddha said the most difficult part of this thing to understand is the law of karma, the way cause and effect works. It's almost impossible to really understand it. But causes produce effects which produce causes which produce effects and this whole thing keeps rolling on and on endlessly until we try to understand it and make some effort to find some freedom. from this rolling ball, this endless cycle. So maybe happiness is freedom. Freedom seems to be what this country is based on, and it seems to have been the highest aspiration.

[07:22]

But what is freedom? What is liberation? In Buddhism, liberation is the highest ideal. So it's very compatible with America. Buddhism and America are very compatible. Because their highest aspiration is liberation. But whether they mean the same thing or not, it's a question. Most people think that freedom means the ability to do whatever you want. But in Buddhism, it means more like freedom from self-restriction, from the restriction of ego. So the way most people construe freedom is the ability to

[08:25]

give ego free reign. And in Buddhism, freedom means the ability to let go of ego, to not be bound by ego, to not be bound by self-centeredness, to not perpetuate and promote this illusion, actually. When we wish each other joy at Christmas time, mostly it's from many people, how many Christmas presents did you get? And what kind of Christmas presents did you get? What kind of material wealth or prosperity

[09:28]

do you have? Prosperity is a very interesting word. It means to do well, actually. To do well. But we construe, we keep upping the ante on prosperity. We keep upping the ante on the standard of living. We have this idea about standard of living, which keeps becoming more and more upgraded all the time. So that if you don't have certain things, it means that you're not really living according to the proper standard of living, standard of life. And when we look at people who are living a simple life, and we feel that they're deprived, and people feel deprived,

[10:35]

If I don't have all those things, then I feel deprived. You know that Avon has invaded the Amazon. Avon workers, by the thousands, have been educated. to go up the Amazon River and sell cosmetics to the Indians, who loved them, and spent all their money, little money they had, on these cosmetics. And if they don't have them, they don't feel they're beautiful. And so, this idea, you know, suddenly a way of life is kind of being destroyed through this illusion that they have to have something more than what they have.

[11:52]

So when you don't have these things that you're supposed to have, you feel more and more deprived. and lower and lower on the social scale. And then you begin to believe that you're poor. And you begin to believe that you're deprived. Whereas before all this happened, people just lived their lives. For good or for ill. So, I don't know if civilization, if this is actually civilization or not. I have some doubt as to whether the progress of human culture is really civilization or not. Because we can easily talk about primitive peoples being savage,

[12:56]

We are the biggest savages of all. The more sophisticated we become, the more savage we are. I mean, we kill millions at a stroke. So in a sense, it's all the same, you know. So we sell a kind of false happiness, false joy and false happiness. This salesmanship of false happiness is really destroying civilization. So anyway, what is happiness? How do we get it? Everybody's looking for it. And we try one thing after another. And we try happiness by the induction method. consumer method.

[13:59]

If we're feeling a little bit down, we can go to the grocery store and get some ice cream. That's a very simple induction method of happiness. But it doesn't last more than a few minutes, you know. Sometimes you feel guilty that you did it. And Through our deceptions, we begin to lose our sense of values and our sense of how we really find joy through interaction. So joy and happiness have become a kind of self-centered, selfish pursuit. It's turned that way because it's instant satisfaction.

[15:05]

We turn a deal and get a lot of money and we have instant satisfaction. Even though we don't know what to do with the money. You get so much you don't know what to do with it anymore. So you build power bases and so forth. But... For a Zen student, we should be thinking about not how to acquire something, but how to find our true freedom. How to find liberation. Not liberation to do, to do in our fellow people, but liberation from the bondage of having to exploit and having to acquire and having to compromise our values.

[16:18]

All of us, we want... I think that fulfillment is through love. There's a certain kind of fulfillment through love. And it filters down, you know. Love is this big word which means so many different things to everybody. But... And people, when they think about Zen, they don't think about love, usually. Love is something that goes on in the movies. All the scenarios in the movies are about love. But Buddhism also has... Love is a very important aspect of Buddhism. But not selfish love. So when we think about love, we usually think about selfish love, which includes projecting onto something or somebody something that you want.

[17:45]

So if you're a man, of course, I won't say what kind of sex, but you may want somebody for some reason. You love this person. when it comes down to it, why do you love this person? We say, oh, I love you only, and you're the only person I can ever love, and so forth. And after your heart is broken, you know, and you recover, then you find somebody else. And then, oh, you're I love you so much, you're the only person for me. And then after your heart is broken, you find somebody else. And you can keep going on and on and playing the same scenario over and over again. We do this. But this is a kind of some need that we have.

[18:50]

This love for things and love for special people is a kind of need that we need, something that we need to have fulfilled in ourselves usually. To love someone means you want to take care of them and without thinking about what's coming to you. So love actually is a kind of, true love is more of a disinterested feeling or quality. In Buddhism, there are four ways to think about love, which actually is fulfilling. Love is fulfilling. We want happiness and joy and fulfillment. And love is fulfilling, but only when we give it away.

[19:55]

So we have loving-kindness, which means to just freely give away love. And the more you give it away, the more it induces, you know. Since everything is continually flowing, when you give away loving-kindness, then it induces the flow of loving-kindness. And that becomes your mode. And through loving-kindness, which means giving away without expecting anything in return. Because you forget yourself. And when you forget yourself, you have joy and happiness. Joy and happiness actually arise when you forget yourself.

[21:06]

Dogen says, to study the Buddhadharma is to study the self, and to study the self is to forget the self. Study here means practice. This is how we obtain joy and happiness. It's very simple, but almost impossible. to do. Being concerned about the welfare of others and also just without judging, without preference to turn that face to everyone. Compassion is an aspect of love. To suffer with others.

[22:09]

In other words, it's really hard to be completely happy until everyone else is happy. Even though we do find some happiness in this life, we're never really completely happy until everyone is happy. Happy, I mean, finds their true joy in life. Because there's so much cruelty in the world. So compassion is a response to cruelty, actually. And it's very difficult for a person who has that feeling for people to find our own selfish happiness when there are so many people who are not happy. So we take on their suffering, directly or indirectly.

[23:18]

And that taking on the suffering of others is also a kind of purification. because everything is connected and because all of us harmonize in some way. A harmonious situation is what creates joy and happiness. And when our surroundings are not harmonious, we can't feel quite right. So even though we may feel some happiness, it's never complete. Because it's not completely harmonious. Our surroundings are not completely harmonious. You know, there's the old story of the parents who used to say, eat all the food on your plate because of the starving people in China.

[24:32]

And the kids, I don't know if you remember that, but... But we used to eat anyway, you know. Well, I have to eat anyway. So it's a wonderful kind of co-op. And you can't solve it there at the table. And you think, well, you know, it's just something that the parents say, you know. It's this impossible thing, you know. China is on the other side of the world, you know. And here we are eating our turkey dinner. But when you really think about it, We have so much prosperity and so many people have nothing. So in some ways it's hard to really enjoy it completely. We can enjoy it by blocking it out, but it's hard to enjoy it completely.

[25:38]

But when we acknowledge the fact or when we take it in, take the suffering in, then there's some kind of joy that arises from that. Because we have the freedom, we kind of give up some part of self in order to be able to experience that. And giving up that self allows some kind of connection to happen. And through that connection, we feel some joy which is very deep. And then there's sympathetic joy. Joy which arises from acknowledging the success of other people. By success, though, we don't mean success in material things, not in the material world, but success in someone's being able to give up some portion of egotistical activity or dependence on self.

[27:13]

But it doesn't mean that if you get a nice car, I won't say, gee, that's really beautiful. You know, I'm happy for you to have it. But it doesn't give me that much joy. It gives me joy. And sympathetic joy is when I see you liberated in some way, finding some true freedom. And we all rejoice in that. And then there's equanimity. Equanimity is actually a form of love because it is based on impartiality, neither on holding on to something nor pushing something away. And even though we may like or dislike someone, or may feel aversion toward something, still in a deep way, in a non-dualistic way, we accept everything equally.

[28:38]

That's a very high form of love, not complete impartiality. So you can love your enemy. This is basic Buddhism. But it's very difficult. So to actually be able to love in its highest sense, very difficult. And all the attempts we make to find objects for this love which everyone has are really attempts to find something deeper.

[29:44]

And we're faced with this wall of objects. which we feel give us some kind of temporary satisfaction, but miss the point, miss the mark. That's why for a Zen student, you know, or someone studying the path of Buddha, freedom means to let go, let go of objects, attachment to objects. We, of course, are always interacting with things, with the world, but without attachment to objects, and without attachment to beings, and without attachment to self. And to find true joy

[30:51]

in calmness of our mind, this is where we find true joy. This undulating world, this restless world, will always be restless. That's the nature of it. And the nature of our human nature is to be able to find equanimity and settledness in this restless world. by moving with it and at the same time being free from it. We don't try to influence the world. We don't try to

[31:54]

make it better or worse. But by sincere practice, through our sincere practice, something happens. Each one of us actually has a sphere of influence in the world. Everybody. And we have overlapping spheres. of influence. And when we have a very positive practice, just our very being and our very practice influences the world. But if we say, oh, we're doing good, or we're doing bad, then it's just egotistical.

[32:58]

Just to be able to do our ordinary activity with the mind of Buddha, with your Buddha mind, and your Buddha body, and your Buddha activity, is enough. Some people will have more effect in the world than others just through the way they are and what they do. But basically, it's enough to light up your own Buddha field, bodhisattva field. Each one of us has a bodhisattva field. and how we interact with that field and harmonize with it and let go of self and practice selfless practice really influences everything

[34:28]

We don't know the far-reaching effects of our actions. Everyone's actions has far-reaching effects. Our activity is endless. The result of our activity is endless. We may think it ends right there, but it keeps going on and on. That's why the world is so restless. And you may think that you don't make a difference, but everybody's activity makes a difference. You may think, I'm not a very important person in the world. I'm just little old me. But little old you makes a big difference in the world.

[35:34]

And each one of us can change the whole world. But not by trying to change it. So we all, you know, in Buddhism and especially in Zen, you know, the object is to get enlightened. But if you run after getting enlightened, you end up with nothing. Not in the good sense. Yes, that's good. And if you end up with nothing, you have perfect freedom. But just do your work.

[36:47]

That's all there is to do. Just do the practice. This year, I just want to encourage you to practice sincerely. Really make some effort All of us, I would like to see all of us make a really strong effort to practice selfless practice and have that be your thought of enlightenment. You want to get enlightened, practice selfless practice. No problem. Except that it's endless. There's no arriving. Or as soon as you arrive, you have to start all over again.

[37:52]

So, moment to moment, And the joy that arrives, that joy is our natural state, actually. But it doesn't depend on whether things are good or bad. This is equanimity. Whether things are good or bad, joy is always there. It's just the result of non-dualistic activity. Just let go. Dogen talks about GGU, Samadhi.

[39:13]

self-joyous or self-fulfilling samadhi, which is just our natural state when you let go, when you no longer hold on to self. And we also call it, in Zazen, we call it shikantaza, just doing, just doing. completely doing without any thought of reward or gaining. Do you have a question? Professional activities in which one's work could be very valuable money-wise.

[40:32]

But actually, what is the correct attitude here? Well, the correct attitude is, this is not my money. So you have to find some way to distribute the money. Society works when the money is evenly distributed. So money doesn't really belong to anybody, even though we say, this is mine. As long as we say, this is mine, then you're caught by money. See? People are caught by People think they have a lot of freedom because they have a lot of money. But actually, they're caught by the money. And we don't realize that. So, you want to be careful with money. And make sure that it gets evenly distributed.

[41:34]

When you see that there are people that have none, give them some. But that doesn't help. It helps a little bit. People need to... just being given something is not so good, not enough, although it's helpful. Helping people to find a way to induce it themselves, that's good. So if someone is very successful in business, then they should help people, give them jobs. Find jobs. Help society work with it. Money is great, you know, there's nothing wrong with money at all. But we have to know how to use it, not be used by it. As long as we know how to use it,

[42:41]

for the benefit of everyone, it's fine. It's just a tool. But, you know, greed sucks up all the goods in one place. The most insecure people are the people that need the most money. You have to realize that. If you weren't so insecure, you wouldn't need it. If you want to find out how secure you are, give everything away. If you want to test yourself, give everything away. So, as much as you need all this power and money, is as much as you're insecure. It's very simple. So, when we look at people who need all this, we see how insecure they are, and how much they need to manipulate and be powerful. But then we use the illusion that being wealthy and powerful is something desirable.

[43:54]

That's the kind of illusion. And then people want to follow that model because they're insecure, too. And so, if we just have all that, then we'll be secure, too. So, it's a big illusion. Because in the end, you lose all your money anyway. And more. So we need something to live on, you know. We should be able to feel comfortable, you know, for most people. And not have to worry too much about, you know, feeding ourselves and finding a place to live and having some things, that's good. But anything more than that just shows our insecurity.

[45:02]

We should be able to find some joyfulness in life as it is. That's why we sit zazen. Zazen, you don't need anything, just breath. And enjoy our breath. And enjoy our posture. Even though your legs hurt. Which your legs are probably hurt like hell right now. But you can enjoy that too. If you don't enjoy your pain, Then you're missing something. Yes. I think there's something mythical about money, because, like, you have these very, very rich people, and you'll get, maybe, you'll get a post in an art,

[46:07]

They give some of it to mine. And maybe they give food, but they don't ever give you money. I mean, most people don't. I mean, they'll give you lodging, but people don't really give out money as such. Is there something difficult or something mysterious about giving money away? Well, some do. Some people are very generous with their money. Other people are very tight with their money. So it's really hard to generalize. And I know so many people who are very generous with their money, you know. And because people are generous with their money, also, we can support Zen Center. So, I understand what you're saying. But I wouldn't apply that to everyone. Well, have a happy new year.

[47:16]

And I'm going to Tassajara for the practice period next week, toward the end of next week. And then I'll be back in February, for most of February, up until my wife's birthday on the 25th. And then I'll go back to Tassajara. And then I'll come back in March. And I have a very complicated life in March. But anyway, I want to say something.

[47:49]

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