I vow to make the truth of the Tathagatas worse. Good morning. Good morning. Well, this is the fourth day, I think, of our session, and middle point, midpoint. I do lose track of days. And for beginners, this long session is always very difficult and it may take a long time or a while in order to break through the notion or the the notion of our fixed self and let go of our acquired notion of what our limitations are.

[01:23]

So the difficulty you have is the same difficulty that all of us have had. So you can rest assured that the difficulty that you have is not unique to yourself. And it doesn't mean that you're inadequate. I've been through all the problems, probably I've had all the problems that all of you have had, individually. So, I do have some understanding of what everyone is going through. And it's not the same for everyone, but on the other hand, pretty close. People who have been practicing a long time, it's much easier.

[02:40]

but not necessarily. There comes a point in Sashin where even for old-timers who've been sitting for many years, this is just like my first Sashin. So we're all in the same boat. But how we deal with our problem is not necessarily the same. So we have to just continue, continue to sit over and over again until we can come through this seeming blank or impenetrable wall. where for no special reason our mind opens up and we can accept everything just as it is.

[03:52]

So until then we are very much dealing with our resistance and until we let go of our resistance Life is pretty difficult in this position. So I encourage you to continue, even though you can't figure it out, how to make it work. And actually you can't ever figure it out. You can, but even though you have it figured out, it doesn't always work. I had it all figured out. Kenjo Kohan, Dougan, actually is talking about how to do this.

[04:59]

But he can't tell you. He can only talk around it. And I can only talk around it. Each one of us has to. immerse ourselves in zazen and find our way by ourselves. But the secret is in letting go of resistance and meeting without avoiding it and becoming one with it. It's an open secret. No secret, but it's hard too.

[06:00]

Nobody can give it to you. I want to encourage you not to be discouraged, and to see it through to the end, all the way up to the very end, to continue your effort. And if you need encouragement, you can come and see me. And if I need encouragement, what do I do? coming to you. Actually, your very strong practice encourages me, and I wouldn't want to do this by myself. So today, I want to continue where I left off with Dogen in these four sentences.

[07:30]

Actually, there are more than four, but four ideas, four ways of looking at enlightenment and delusion. Dogen says, to carry the self forward, this is from yesterday, to carry the self forward and realize the 10,000 dharmas is delusion. That the 10,000 dharmas advance and realize the self is enlightenment. It is Buddhas who enlighten delusion. It is creatures who are deluded in enlightenment. Further, there are those who attain enlightenment above enlightenment, and there are those who are deluded within delusion. When buddhas are truly buddhas, one need not be aware of being buddha. However, one is the realized buddha and further advances in realizing buddha. So yesterday I talked about the first two paragraphs. To carry the self forward and realize the 10,000 dharmas is delusion. That the 10,000 dharmas advance and realize the self is enlightenment.

[08:34]

It is buddhas who enlighten delusion. It is creatures who are deluded in enlightenment. Further, there are those who attain enlightenment above enlightenment, and there are those who are deluded within delusion. When he says, there are those who attain enlightenment above enlightenment, and there are those who are deluded within delusion, actually, he means the same thing. These are just two sides of the same thing. to say enlightenment and deluded within delusion is really the same thing. Enlightenment above enlightenment or beyond enlightenment means that from the point of view of enlightenment there's nothing but enlightenment wherever you look. As we know, when Shakyamuni attained enlightenment, he is reported to have said, I am enlightened with all sentient beings.

[09:51]

Now that I am enlightened, I see that everything is enlightened. Everything is enlightenment. The light of Buddha nature permeates everything. I see that. I see it in myself and I see it in everything. And to say there are those who are deluded within delusion means the same thing. But from the other side, from the other side of delusion, of enlightenment, because enlightenment doesn't exist without delusion and delusion doesn't exist without enlightenment. So to say deluded within delusion means completely deluded. Nothing is outside of this delusion. This delusion covers everything.

[10:55]

It's like saying right now you can say we're all sitting in enlightenment. You can also say we're all sitting completely in delusion. Either way, same thing. Maybe better to say, we're all sitting in delusion, so that it brings us down to earth. So, either way is okay. But if you're completely deluded, completely immersed in delusion. Same thing as being completely enlightened. Just another way of expressing enlightenment. from the point of view of just being in our activity, without being separate from activity, completely immersed in ordinary life of delusion.

[12:35]

So enlightenment, in this sense, is to see through delusion. As we said before, enlightenment is to be enlightened about delusion. To be able to see through delusion without getting rid of it. and to be enlightened beyond enlightenment. Just to see through delusion and still wash the dishes. Suzuki Roshi says, when you think that when you're enlightened, when you're enlightened you'd be a lot different than you are now. But when you go by, if you're a person that likes sake,

[13:48]

When you go by the sake shop, there'd still be something pulling you. A very strong force pulling you to go in the door. That might still be there. But with some difference. And then he says, when Buddhas are truly Buddhas, one need not be aware of being Buddha. This is actually another way of saying being enlightened, beyond enlightenment. Not being aware of enlightenment, not being aware of being Buddha. Buddha doesn't see Buddha. Someone else comes and says, oh, you're a Buddha.

[14:52]

Oh, yeah? Is that so? The eye, you know, doesn't see the eye. Our eye will never see the back of our head. So, to be Buddha is to forget Buddha. To be enlightened is to forget enlightenment. So, however, one is to realize Buddha and further advances in realizing Buddha means to, when we have some realization, not to stick to it. Not to try to stick to a world of enlightenment, but just to get down into the thick of things with people.

[15:54]

This is why lay practice is so, I feel lay practice is so important. Because in lay practice, you know, you leave the zendo and you go out into this world, into the world of the thick of the problems. And then you say, God, I forgot all about practice. I forgot all about what to do. As soon as I step out the door, I'm in a different world. And then you think, well, maybe it would be better if I was in a monastery where that wouldn't happen. But actually, the fact that you do that and forget all about being Buddha is right on. You're just out there. That's going beyond Buddha, going beyond enlightenment and delusion, actualizing Buddha and continuing to actualize Buddha without even thinking about Buddha or enlightenment.

[17:22]

But in the morning you wake up and you come and sit zazen without even thinking about being Buddha or getting enlightenment. Both sides are the same. When there's no difference between coming to the zendo and sitting zazen, or sitting sashin all week, and going out, working, honking your horn, driving the streets, dealing with your family. When there's no difference between those two, then you have real practice. But that's when you say, well, why come to the zendo then? Well, why should I do this? What's it all mean? So, when that's so, when you have that kind of practice that is so well completely integrated, the question comes up, and it's a good question.

[18:28]

But it does give you pause, because we're always making these distinctions. This is when our dualistic mind arises and starts making distinctions. This is practice, this is ordinary life. And we set up practice as something very special. And we really can't help doing it. It's really hard to help doing it. So, sometimes people ask me, well, doesn't that doubt ever come up in your mind, or that question? Not that I'm so advanced, but somehow I understand this prop, this point. We're always looking for something special to be the mark of enlightenment. something to set off enlightenment from delusion.

[19:44]

So, when we begin to practice, we do it for ourself. But then, when I practice because mature, and we understand what it is, then we no longer do it just for ourself. And then compassion arises, but we take our vows very seriously. Even though a vow, bodhisattva vows are impossible to fully complete, We take our vows seriously, to have compassion for all beings. And then our practice is dedicated to all beings, not just to ourselves.

[20:53]

So usually we have a special task or special purpose to do something. But when we have the freedom to come and go without any hindrance, this is the fulfillment of practice, to have that complete freedom to come and go. Then we don't have a special purpose. or self-interest purpose. Whatever the circumstances are, we just respond. So this is why it's important to have a steady practice, to have a steady zazen practice.

[22:22]

Because the enlightened life manifests through steady practice, through continuous steady practice, without looking for something special. We just do the work. This is our work. We just do the work. We're not thinking about the result. without being attached to the result. Well, maybe this will lead to enlightenment if I work hard enough. Well, 10 minutes of work is 10 minutes of enlightenment. If you want enlightenment, just do the work. but you may not recognize it. That's the problem.

[23:32]

So then, Dogen goes on to say, seeing forms with the whole body and mind, hearing sounds with the whole body and mind, one understands them intimately. Yet, it is not like a mirror with reflections, nor like water under the moon. When one side is realized, the other side is dark. Seeing forms with the whole body and mind, hearing sounds with the whole body and mind, one understands them intimately, this is awakening. Usually, we see something, or we hear something, or we touch something, smell something. But seeing with the whole body and mind, hearing with the whole body and mind, means awakening to reality with nothing left out.

[24:44]

says only when you see through the ear or hear through the eye will you get it. So, you know, our sensory perception is divided into hearing, seeing, smelling, tasting, touching, feeling. I may have left one out. the senses, and there is this division, but they all meet in the same place. And the brain makes distinctions between them. But actually, consciousness is more than just the consciousness of six senses. When you take away the channels, then there's only one experience.

[25:57]

Body-mind are not two different things, even though we talk about them as two different things. Body-mind and object are three and one. So to experience a thing totally, is to drop body and mind. As Dogen says, let go of body and mind. Let go of our idea, our concept of what it is that we experience. And then experience is complete. So as soon as we name something, we separate it out and then it becomes an idea.

[27:06]

So we're always dealing with ideas and very little with reality. So our whole cognitive process creates ideas about things. This is why it's said that this world is just our mind. It's mind in two ways. One is, in one way, everything is true mind. Just mind only. Big mind. In another way, we create various distinctions between things. And the way we see everything is according to the way our mind orients. and names and compares. So we narrow things down and conceptualize them.

[28:10]

And then our minds work on these concepts, continually conceptualizing and naming and dividing until all we have is ideas. And then it's wonderful sometimes when the ideas go away And you can just really touch reality. Sometimes, isn't it wonderful to go up into the mountains? Because in the mountains, somehow your mind is clear. And you can touch reality. Or you go into the ocean, and you touch reality. Or you sit in Zazen, and you touch reality. Even though the conceptual mind... So in Zazen we have this opportunity, great opportunity, to hear sounds and see forms for the whole body and mind.

[29:15]

Letting go of our conceptual apparatus. Conceptual apparatus is important. Oh yeah, that's right. This is my spoon. And then forget it. Your mind doesn't stop there. This is just a designation. It's just a name. I call this spoon. But what is it? I call it wood, but what is it? I call this a bowl, but what is it? I call this oatmeal, but what is it? So it's important to have names for things, but as soon as we name something, we're already in a different state of consciousness.

[30:37]

So Dogen says, seeing forms with the whole body and mind, hearing sounds with the whole body and mind, one understands them intimately. You know, Kyogen's famous story about Kyogen, who left his teacher because he couldn't, Isan, because Isan wouldn't answer his questions. he went to, he decided that he could no longer really study Buddhism. He wasn't worthy, even though he's quite a brilliant teacher, a brilliant student. He decided that he just couldn't penetrate it, so he retired to sweep the tomb around the, monument, Nangako Eijo, the Sixth Patriarch's disciple.

[31:55]

And while he was, he said, this is enough of a life for me. I just retire. And so while he was sweeping the grounds one day, this little stone hit a bamboo and went, this whole mind opened up. For one thing, It's really an interesting story because he was working really hard, you know, and he couldn't get it. And then he decided to just give up in an extreme way, actually, just give up in an extreme way. And then when he wasn't expecting anything and his mind was open and not working too hard, some unexpected circumstance just opened his mind completely. So he was quite ready for that. And there were no obstacle, no more obstacles.

[32:59]

This is called intimate, being intimate with it. And then Duggan says, it is yet it is not like a mirror with reflections or like water under the moon. When one side is realized, the other side is dark. This is one difficult passage, sometimes, to understand. Because in another place, in Genjoko, Dogen says, it is like the moon reflected in the water. Enlightenment is like the moon reflected in the water. The moon goes all the way down to the bottom, and the water is not disturbed. This is how he talks about enlightenment. The moon is reflected on the water all the way to the bottom, but the water is not disturbed. Here, he says, it is not like a mirror with reflections, nor like water under the moon.

[34:05]

So this is the dualistic side, but not completely dualistic. He's talking about the two sides, dualistic in the sense that he's talking about illumination and darkness. He says, when one side is realized, the other side is dark. You can say, when on is realized, ko is dark. In other words, when we are completely one with our activity, the whole rest of the universe is not, we're not aware of. This is our whole world. Even though it's all one piece. It's like sitting on top of, it's like an iceberg, you know. Even though you see just the tips, that this is where the activity is,

[35:11]

this tip of the iceberg. But underneath the ocean, the iceberg is huge, tremendous. But you don't see that. You're only focused on this part that's visible. So in our life, we only focus on the part that's visible. We only deal with one thing at a time. How can we know the whole universe? when we're only dealing with one thing at a time, one small speck of the universe. But it's like if you pick up a piece of cloth, you pick up one corner and the whole thing comes up with it. Right? So what's hard for us to realize is the inner far-reaching consequences of the interdependence of our actions, that we're not just isolated, that within our delusion, the whole rest of the universe of enlightenment is right there.

[36:35]

So, one, there's an interesting analogy. You can talk about, you know, in the Sandokai, Sekito talks about dark and light. Same thing, actually. The meeting of, Oneness and duality, or absolute and relative, or dark and light. Light means relative. Everything is illuminated in the light. And in the darkness, all things are one, as he says. So darkness means absolute equality. And light means everything is illuminated individually. So dark is co-, and light is on, koan, the merging of koan, the oneness of our koan.

[37:46]

And without darkness there's no light, and without light there's no darkness. They depend on each other, and they're like the box and the lid, fitting perfectly. Sekito says in Sando Kai, it's like the foot before and the foot behind in walking. Light and dark are like the foot before and the foot behind in walking. We go from light to dark, from birth to death. oneness to duality, and the step before is now the step behind. So Chen Kuan, who is the fourth patriarch of the Hawaiian school, had a wonderful analogy.

[39:03]

He says, in the total exertion of one dharma, Dogen talks about this, he uses this phrase a lot, the total exertion of one dharma, means everything has its dharma position. Talked about dharmas, when all dharmas are buddhadharma. Each dharma, each thing has its own position in the world, which is unique and completely different from every other thing in the world. And this dharma has its own position and is not interfered with by anything else. This is our on position, when we're on. So he says, the total exertion of one dharma

[40:04]

On the eighth day of the lunar month, half the moon is bright and the other half is dark. This is when the moon is in such a position that one side is completely, it's a half moon. One side is light and the other is dark. The very appearance of the bright part, that's called disclosed, affirms but does not negate the existence of the hidden part. Likewise, the manifestation of something always implies the existence of the unmanifested or concealed part of the same thing, like an iceberg. At the moment when the bright part of the moon is disclosed, the dark part also secretly establishes itself. So, as Sekito says, light and dark are like a pair, like the foot before and the foot behind and walking.

[41:15]

The same thing, as Sekito said, the same thing, sometimes, there's one thing, sometimes we call it daytime, sometimes we call it night. Depending upon whether something is revealed or concealed. And there's this wonderful koan, you know, of Hyakujo sitting on Mount Daiyu, Dai-yo, Dai-hu-yo, Dai-yu-ho. Someone asks Hyakujo, what is the most wonderful thing? And he says, just sitting alone on the top of Mount Daiyu-ho. Just this point on the top of this iceberg, just to be on this seat which is supported by the whole universe. This is Dharma position.

[42:23]

Dharma position is just this seat or this place or this step which is supported by the whole universe. This is enlightened vision, enlightened understanding. That this deluded place is supported by the whole universe and supports the whole universe So, yet it is not like a mirror with reflections, you know, like water under the moon, which would be totally illuminating. When one side is realized, the other side is dark. So, even though awakening

[43:35]

with the whole body and mind, hearing sounds with the whole body and mind, and understanding them intimately, yet it is not like a mirror with reflections, nor like water under the moon. When one side is realized, the other side is dark. And this is actually epitomized by Zazen, because Zazen is the most restricted activity. seemingly, and yet within this seemingly restricted activity is the most freedom until we completely open up. Before we open up, it seems like the most restricted activity, but when we open up, then it's the most complete freedom. When one side is illuminated, the other side is dark, it means just do it.

[44:52]

Just be completely one with your activity. Everything will be included, even though you can't see it.

[45:04]

@Text_v004
@Score_JJ