February 4th, 1972, Serial No. 00193

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I appended a note to the statement Dogen made about gyoji, or practice. Particularly, that which I mentioned the other day, gyoji is not what a man should attach to, but what he should return to, ultimately. This commentator said, much to your vexation, it is very true that everything is a manifestation of your mind.

[01:11]

Everything is, it is very true. Much to your vexation, it is very true that everything is a manifestation of your mind. But, briefly speaking, probably you may believe that everything exists, everything may exist, with its substantial, substantial, but in Buddhism, not Buddhism anyway,

[02:19]

but in the actual sense, that everything is created by individuals, the world, the world is created by individuals. The world is not created by God or by Buddha. This is a very different point from another religion. So you create, you create Katagiri, you create Tathagata, you create Zazen. Very interesting. But you say, but you say, I am annoyed to think that everything is created by myself. Then you ask, you have some doubt, why? Why is it, why is it Dogen put the strong emphasis, you should practice Zazen hard?

[03:29]

It's nonsense. Even though you practice hard, seriously, according to the fact that everything is created by yourself, well, where is true Zazen? Where is true Zazen? Well, I don't like Zazen. But, this is, this is very characteristic of Buddhist viewpoint. When you want to see into the depths of human life, this point is very important. Everything is created by yourself, by individuals. But it's pretty hard to believe.

[04:31]

But the other day, I mentioned about the therapy of primal screaming. I was not going to, going to say that the therapy of primal screaming was not helpful for your life. Okay, it is pretty good. It is, it is helpful for you. But according to the, according to the Buddhistic viewpoint, the, the evidence therapy of primal screaming is a sort of recreation, creation.

[05:37]

I think so, I think so, not true. Not only the therapy of primal screaming, you know, look at the, look at the world around you. Many kinds of religion, many kinds of philosophy, many kinds of psychology, many kinds of disciplines of socialism, communism, and so on, democracy, you see, many kinds of thoughts. Whatever you say, whatever you try to believe, one of those, which you would, which you would expect something helpful from them.

[06:49]

According to the Buddhistic viewpoint, they are sort of recreation. This is really true. But recreation is very important for us. If you take away, if you take away from your, if you take recreation away from your life, you are completely crazy. You can't, you can't exist in this world. But recreation is very important. So sometimes you sit zazen as a recreation, that's all right. And then, then after that, who takes responsibility for it? Teacher? Buddha? Dogen? I don't, I don't think so. You, you yourself must take responsibility for it.

[07:56]

So recreation is all right. Serious zazen is all right. Authentic way of zazen is all right. It's up to you. The Buddhism, don't ignore, don't take refuge, refuse, ignore, don't ignore. The recreation, or rock and ball, or I Ching, or Christian, Christianity, or Buddhism, whatever. If you want to believe in Christianity, Christianity is okay. If you want to believe in Buddhism, it is okay. But seriously, strictly speaking, according to the Buddha's eye, even Buddhism, even Christianity, are sort of recreation for you.

[09:12]

Because the Christianity and Buddhism which you try to believe are sort of recreation, which you try to seek for some pleasure. Or relief. You should keep in mind this point. This is very important. If you read the Diamond Sutra, the Diamond Sutra says a man, a life is like a phantom, phantom, or dream, or something, something, phosphic, phosphic? A phosphic, what is it? What? Phosphic. Can you believe this point? Can you believe your life?

[10:32]

My life is something like phosphic, or dream. You can't. If it is true, if you try to believe, you feel, it makes you pensive, you know? It makes you, your life, you pensive. This is really true. Shisho tried to describe about the principle of Avatantaka school. The principle of Avatantaka, Avatantaka school was developed, developed chiefly in China. And it is also the great learned achievements of Buddhism, Chinese Buddhism.

[11:34]

They tried to explain completely, absolutely, absolutely the true aspect of human life. If you want to know the truth, try to study the Avatantaka Sutra, Avatantaka principle itself. Great, wonderful, complete. He tried to explain philosophically. Then, when the Avatantaka school came to Japan, it wasn't developed, because it is too theoretical. It is too philosophical. But on the other hand, it is really a glory of learned achievement of Chinese Buddhism.

[12:36]

Also, they say, everything is, life is a dream, a phantom, a ghost. Hallucinations. So, you don't like this, but you can escape from this. Really true. So, through your Zazen, please, realize this point. That's why Dogen then says, Gyoji is, Gyoji is not what man tries to attach to, but what he should return to ultimately.

[13:49]

Whatever you believe, communism, democracy, socialism, it's okay. First of all, you have to return yourself, ultimately, through and through. In other words, you have to settle on yourself first. In other words, you have to, you have to realize an expansive field of merit within yourself, first. The horse is always waiting in this path, within yourself, okay? Then, wherever you may go, pasture should be within yourself. Then at that time, when it rains, the scenery, when it rains, within the world of pasture, is beautiful for your life.

[15:08]

But if you seek the pasture of objectified, you are always discouraged from this path, the moment when it rains. Because you think the rain occupies all over of pasture. So, you feel melancholy. When it rains today, everybody is melancholy. I don't like to get up in the morning, I want to sleep. It is, this is the case not for the practice of Zazen, not for the Gyojin, but also for life itself.

[16:21]

So, life is what you, yourself, return to, ultimately. If you can return to yourself, ultimately, through and through, and settle on yourself in peace, you can handle, yourself, you can handle whatever kind of principles, communism, socialism, Christianity, Buddhism, smoothly. And it will help your life. So, while you seek the pasture of objectified, pasture always make use of your life.

[17:34]

You are always affected by the pasture of objectified. But if you find, if you realize, the pasture exists within yourself, you are not affected by the pasture. You are always free in pasture. Whatever happens, rain, rainy days, or shiny, sunny day. You can understand, better, what Buddhism is, what Christianity is, what socialism is. But if you miss this important point, it's pretty hard to handle, well, any kind of principles, even Buddhism, it's pretty hard.

[18:54]

A Zen master says, All you have to do is, just to take care of your life, take care, take the best care of your life. Like a, like a, like a, like a, place. A friend of mine, when I was working at a big company, which producted diesel engines.

[20:13]

We had, one day, a big party, a wave together. After the party, we had some show. Each division, each section, had to take responsibility for showing something. So, one of my friends, at that time, played a female part. Huh? Oh, yeah, anyway, the man, the actress, sort of, man actress.

[21:28]

You know the Japanese Kabuki play? You know, they will realize beautiful ladies on the stage. But, she's not a man, and she's not a girl, a lady. She's a man. So, our friend of mine was a man actress, at that time. But nobody didn't know. Then, she showed on the stage. She played one of the old folk songs, Japanese folk songs. Dancing? During that, she was showing the play on the stage. Nobody didn't recognize she was a man. Everybody believed she was a beautiful lady.

[22:33]

Then, the moment when the play was over, a storm of hand clapping arose. The moment the play was over. Then, everybody was curious of who was she. Then, immediately, some audience visited the dressing room behind the stage. In order to recognize who was she. Then, at that time, everybody was surprised. Because, everybody noticed that, noticed that really black hairs on her shank.

[23:43]

At that time, she was a man. Everybody realized that she was a man. During the play, everybody believed how wonderful, how beautiful she was. Nobody didn't recognize. But, she was a man. But, she completely showed, she completely showed her face. As a woman, as a lady, as a female part. That's wonderful. That's wonderful. So, all you have to, even though, even though,

[24:55]

psychology, or philosophy, or therapy of primal screaming, are all a sort of recreation, recreation, it doesn't mean that you should ignore the presence of them, their presence. Recreation is very important. All you have to do is to show, completely, fully. When you try to seek, when you try to research, philosophy, or buddhism, or christianity, or communism, whatever, you have to show fully and completely, as a man who is researching christianity, buddhism, and so on. Before you criticize, before you criticize.

[26:04]

So, first of all, we have to understand through and through, our practice is not what we have to attach to, but what we have to return to. Until, you have to settle on yourself, within our being first. First, create your meadow, your own meadow, within yourself, not in the world of object, objective world. This is our practice. Because the purpose of buddhism is not research, something objective.

[27:31]

As mentioned very often, when you try to understand the water, maybe you are curious of what water is, through experiment, chemical experiment. It is very important too. So, you will realize water is, it's to all, combination of hydrogen and oxygen. This is okay. But it's not all what you have to do. Because, when you, whatever you try to handle, whatever you face, whatever you try to face, water or fire, whatever.

[28:34]

First of all, you must be free. You must be always free from the presence of water. The purpose of buddhism is to be free from anything objective, and also from yourself, first. It is called Gidatsu, emancipation. Emancipation is not to ignore the presence, existence of all things. Emancipation is to understand entirely, what the fundamental, what the fundamental fact of human life or all beings are.

[29:42]

In other words, that's why you are first free from yourself, from anything objective. Or, you may say, Zazen is also a sort of recreation. Then, Dogenzin says, if you want to learn Zazen, if you want to learn the life, your life, is to forget life. To forget life is to be free from life of your own. At that time, life supports your life simultaneously, naturally,

[30:50]

regardless of whether you like or dislike. Okay? Do you have a question? Ah, excuse me. So, Zazen, you should forget even the idea that Zazen is a sort of recreation. Okay? You should forget even the idea that Zazen is a true manifestation of the Buddha nature.

[31:55]

You should forget. Then, actually, what should you do? All you have to do is to show, to reveal, yourself, when you practice Zazen, like one of my friends, when he tried to show his clay, as a man's access. So, there is nothing left, nothing to be left. It is behind your practice. Practice always enables you to return to yourself, through and through. This is our practice. Do you have a question?

[32:58]

Actually, you mentioned that the world is in our mind, that everything exists in our mind. Is that to say that nothing really exists out there, it's just a projection of the mind? Do you have a question? In Buddhism, there is a technical idiom, which is called Issi Shikhen. Issi means water, one water, single water. Shikhen is four kinds of viewpoints, four viewpoints. It means,

[34:07]

man, no, it means, there are four kinds of viewpoints, when you try to see of water. Man, when man sees the water, he thinks that water is just water. When a fish tries to see the water, water is not water. Water, water is like a house, or palace.

[35:11]

When a heavenly being sees the water, the water becomes a jewel. When the hungry ghost sees the water, the water immediately becomes fire, because the hungry ghost always wants to drink a cup of water. He is always thirsty. Like a man who is continually walking in a huge expanse field of the desert in the United States. In the daytime, there is no shadows. You walk continually, you realize that how thirsty you are,

[36:16]

and then you start to seek where is water. Then you, sometimes, you get a big hallucination, a beautiful lake right before you. Wow! Water! You are rushing to the water, jumping to it. But, unfortunately, it is sand. That's hungry ghost. So, hungry ghost, when the hungry ghost sees the water, the water becomes completely fire. So, where is water? Where is water? Water exists here. Of course, it is true. But, actually, if there are ten persons, ten kinds of

[37:18]

who are the animate beings, each of them try to have completely different viewpoint when they see the water. From this point, there is no water which has its own substantial, which is called water. When you see the water, you create water from your mind. Then, that's why he said, there is water. The fish said, it's not water, it's house. The fish tried to give a great suggestion to you,

[38:19]

but you sticked, you attached to the water, saying, this is water, water, water. Then, at last, you fight. What did you say? This is war. This is war. This is fight. Do you understand? How do you get free from yourself? How do you get free from yourself? How? How could you? Or, how do you? How do I free from myself? Well, it looks like a question, the same question, are you happy? One of the students asked me, are you happy? Well, sometimes, I may say, yes, I am happy.

[39:20]

Maybe not, I am not happy. Which is what? Well, then I said, I always have to get two months. Then, student said, what for? For nothing. Nothing. He didn't mean you, but I think he meant anyone, you. Yeah, anyone. Anyone. It is the case, now for me, anyone, everybody, everybody must get the full marks. In this moment, moment, moment, if you get the zero mark, you are completely discouraged, help. You have to

[40:23]

scream, help. That's the zero mark. Or you are going to completely in different direction. Keep it like that. But full marks, full marks is not the, it doesn't mean to pass the examination in mathematics, in practice, don't worry about examination. Examination, whatever kind of examination you try to get. Mathematics, it doesn't, someone says, you cannot pass the examination, it doesn't, it doesn't, that's all. Even though you cannot

[41:26]

pass examination, in the guidance of the Zen master, you can any time get the full marks. Okay? Full marks. Do you agree? Hmm? That's wonderful. That's wonderful. Hi. You mentioned the Japanese word for practice. Hmm? Practice? The Japanese word for practice. Could you say what is the difference between the English word practice and Japanese word practice? There are many kinds of

[42:27]

words in Japanese where you try to express the practice. Sometimes we use the shugyo. This word shugyo is literally a defined practice. Defined actions. Defined action. Defined. Or profound. Some profound action. Ah, the dog use the word gyoji. Gyoji. Gyo is action. They try. Ji is to sustain. To maintain. To hold. To keep. Okay? To sustain the action.

[43:29]

What is action? What kind of action? This action is refined action. Refined action. All you have to do is continually to sustain the refined action. It is fu-mak. Fu-mak. For fu-mak, you cannot get fu-mak. Refined action. With injector sense, fu-mak or the refined action can be manifested. Manifested when you put into practice. Okay? Okay. When you talk of

[44:34]

seeing this world as a bubble or a can an illusion, I often get confused because apparently the social way of just sitting is so subtle that it seems almost beyond me. There are other schools of meditation that use vigorous techniques in order to help the student find this world. For instance, they say in yoga that you put your emphasis on up here, on the forehead, so that you can get here, beyond the body. For example, to keep our mind on our belly so that we can become more here. That seems almost like a paradox that we tend to

[45:37]

not see the world as an illusion. We don't practice vigorous dancing or a breath of fire or these other various techniques to see this world, because we haven't talked about it often. And often I find myself in a situation where I am meshed in a thought world of an illusion. But I can't get out beyond that thought. I'm in a box. I want to get beyond the thought. I don't seem to have a method or a way to get me through that. Yes. I came to you to be okay. Yes. But as mentioned before, the purpose of Buddhism is not to get

[46:38]

a certain stage. A certain stage. Whatever you say. It is a saintly stage or the ordinary person stage. Or communist stage. Or democratic stage. Or Christian stage. Or Buddhist stage. Whatever you say. The purpose of Buddhism is not to get a certain stage. Because if you get a certain stage, for instance how wonderful Christianity is. How wonderful Buddhism is. Why you are. Why you believe. How wonderful Buddhism is. Someone criticizes Buddhism. You say, no, no, Buddhism is wonderful. Try to practice. Try to practice.

[47:42]

Can't you? Can't you believe it? You're always against. You're always against his idea. Because you are completely crazy about Buddhism. You try to keep certain ideas. How beautiful Buddhism is. How wonderful Zazen is. At that time, it means it means you attach. There is a sort of attach. Something attached. Attached to Buddhism. Okay? So what is this? Even the slightest attachment you are not free. You are not free. Okay? You are not completely free. You are affected.

[48:44]

Affected by an idea which is called Buddhism. Which is called Zazen. Then the purpose of Buddhism is to awaken man. To awaken a man to be free from his attachment. His attachment. Okay? Attachment is very complicated. Attachment comes from two ways. One is intellectual sense. The other one is emotional sense. The attachment comes from illusion anyway. Delusion. Which you can sever by the intellectual insight.

[49:44]

Insight. By insight. Deep insight into human life. With intellectual sense. Okay? And also the other delusion which is severed by continual Zazen practice. Because this illusion comes from emotional or sensational such as covetous or anger or lust. Overpower. Overpower. Overpowering. Overpowering desires. You know so well. You know so well. Don't attach

[50:47]

to Zazen. How wonderful Zazen is. I don't care. You believe. You understand so well. I don't care. I don't care who I am. You know? I am poor man. I am rich man. I don't care. You know so well. But when you are confident with no money, well, I would like to get more money. Because it is inconvenience for me to live in this world. This is true. When I was college student, I was very poor. Sometimes I went to the city. I went to the city which is very big town to get something to get the book and so on.

[51:47]

Then that time I didn't have money for the car, for the train. So I have to walk. I have to walk back to my home. I think over two miles. Then I was hungry. The road is very steep. Like San Francisco. So at that time I thought, well, no money is very inconvenience for me. Very inconvenience. So at that time, well, I should walk. I should get the part-time job. Then I found the part-time job

[52:51]

of bookstores. Then I worked in a bookstore for five days. Then I was fired. Then I was poor again. You know so well, I don't care. I don't care who I am, how interested I am, how poor I am, how ignorant I am. You don't care. You know so well. But something something compelling to encourage, to attach. Well, why don't you get a part-time job? To get a little more. A little more money in order to let you be convenient in your life. This is true. This is

[53:52]

delusion. This is delusion, which it is not so easy to sever completely with the sense. It is lust. It is lust of lust of gold. Lust of power. Lust for power or fame or gain. So if you the purpose of zazen is to sever, to be free from to from this illusion, delusion. In other words, attachment

[54:56]

coming from these illusions. If you practice zazen for several years you can understand you can cut, you can cut some part of some aspect of your delusion. But the other hand the least get us to the other hand

[55:25]

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