I vow to taste the truth of the Tathagata's words. Good morning. Next weekend, for three days, we're having a sasheen. So I wanted to, but it's appropriate to, say something about Zazen, encourage your practice, and remind us of what our practice is. When I first began to practice at Old Sokoji on Bush Street, San Francisco, 1964, I was very happy to find a practice that wasn't just a Sunday sermon or going to church once a week

[01:18]

What I found was a practice that engaged my whole body mind daily, continuously. This is what I was so happy about when I finally found this practice. which is so rare in the world. I'd been looking for this practice all my life. And when I found this practice, I realized that this is what I'd always been doing. You know, when Shakyamuni, discovered his way. He said, it's like walking down a path and seeing a side path that's overgrown with bushes and shrubbery and not having been traversed for a long time.

[02:39]

Something people didn't notice, but it was always there. And so I took that path, and that opened things up for me, and I realized my true nature. This was the true path, but it had been obscured. But it had always been there. So that's the way I felt when I found this practice. This is the practice that was always innate. But when I discovered it, it opened up and I said, of course, this has always been my practice. It's just that I'm now discovering it. It's now opened up for me. So I've always been very grateful for the practice. Whenever I bow, I always bow in gratitude that this practice has been offered to me

[03:47]

So that's the feeling I always have about it. I don't take it for granted. It could disappear at any moment. So in order to keep it awake, in order to keep myself awake, I have to be very diligent because my tendency is to goof off. when I was looking for my real practice, which I had been doing for all my life, actually, I found traces of it in various other practices, Judaism, Christianity, the Tao. But For me, who was such an undisciplined person, it didn't work because although I would have wonderful flights of religious ecstasy, I couldn't sustain it on a

[05:08]

sustained level. There was something that was sustained, but I always fell into degeneration. I'm easily given to degeneration. So when I found this practice, it had structure, it had discipline, and it was every day. And it had a teacher, and it had a practice. And Zazen was the keystone. Everything, all the discipline, the formality, the teacher, the Sangha, the teaching, all pointed to one thing, which was sitting Zazen. So I feel that Zazen saved my life.

[06:12]

And so this is why I have always felt like It's always given me great pleasure to help or to introduce or to maintain the practice myself, for myself and everyone else who has affinity for the practice. Not everyone has an affinity for the practice. Practice is open to everyone. Universal. which is open to everyone, but not everyone is open to practice. You know, many people pass through the Berkeley Zen Center. Every Saturday we have Zazen instruction, and a number of people come and they learn something, or they are introduced to something,

[07:18]

called Zazen, and then they leave. Once in a while, someone stays. And then maybe they will continue and maybe they won't. So it's a kind of self-selective practice. You can't force your husband or your wife to do Zazen. or your children, or your uncle, or your best friend. Everyone, only those people who have an affinity for practice will practice. So not everyone is ready. Sometimes people come to practice and although they have an affinity, they're not yet ready to put themselves into the practice. Sometimes someone will come to practice who has an affinity and practice for a while, but then because of unfinished karmic business, they have to leave and take care of that karmic business.

[08:33]

10 years later, they come back and they say, hi, and I say, oh, hi, as if nothing had happened in between. That's always been my attitude. It's, oh, hi, you know. No questions or anything. We just, if you want to continue, we just continue where we left off. No questions asked. So if we do have that kind of affinity, we can't really, once we're introduced to practice, we can't really stay away, or we can't really quit, even though we stay away. We can't really quit because that zazen experience will always have an effect on our life. So during the course of practice, you know, we come to practice usually with some kind of inspiration.

[09:46]

Actually, our enlightenment, our enlightened mind leads us to practice. Our awakened mind leads us to practice. Excuse me, sometimes we tend, there's a tendency to think that we practice from delusion to enlightenment. We start out deluded and then we practice and then we gain enlightenment. But I don't say that's wrong. But the way it actually works is that our enlightened mind brings us to practice, because enlightenment is mixed with delusion. And so we think, well, I'm not enlightened yet. It's true. You're not enlightened, but enlightenment is present. And enlightenment is what brings us to practice. Otherwise, there wouldn't be any desire to practice. The desire to practice is the enlightened mind, the awakened mind.

[10:58]

So we come to practice with some inspiration. We read a book or we want something or, you know. Enlightened mind brings the deluded mind to practice. And says, well, let's do this. Let's go to Zendo and see what happens. And so the enlightened mind takes diluted mind by the hand and brings you along. But we don't realize this. So we have inspiration and then we engage with practice and it seems pretty good and all these wonderful things happen when you sit, including painful legs, but we get through that. So it's exciting, and we get buoyed up, and then we get to a certain place where we can sit pretty well, comfortably.

[12:02]

And then there's a plateau. And this plateau is like five o'clock in the morning, you get up, you sit the odds in, and you go to work. And then next day, five o'clock, and then after zazen we have service and we chant the best we can, even though it doesn't always sound so good. And then we do nine bows, you know, and then do we have to bow again? Do we have to chant that sutra again? I did that yesterday. So we start to think of Zazen or the practice as something usual. It becomes our usual mode. And then we say, why am I doing this? And then because we think we have it, we start thinking about all those wonderful things that we could be doing instead of this.

[13:04]

And that's really easy to do. beautiful day, you know? Why should I sit sasheen on a beautiful day? So, practice, you know, takes dedication. Without dedication, you lose it. There are so many activities that are vying for our attention. that unless we have a very firm conviction and intention, we just get swept away. It's so easy to get swept away. I really, when I look around, I see all these dedicated people. It's a marvel to me to see all of you present today. we have to be careful and not take it for granted that things will continue.

[14:24]

So after we get to this plateau and things start seeming usual, and then we start kind of backing off or, you know, Taking it for granted, Suzuki Roshi, in one of his talks, talks about constancy. You may chant, you may feel, I've done nine bows yesterday, now I'm doing nine bows. It's important that we never repeat anything. The spirit of repetition, so-called, is only repetition superficially, because we think, well, I did this yesterday, but you didn't do this yesterday. You've never done this before in your life.

[15:32]

Whatever you're doing is something you have never done before, even though it resembles something that you did before. For a musician, when you play a piece of music, you say, I've done this piece a thousand times. But what keeps it fresh and new is that you've never done it before. So when we get the idea that we've done this before, that's delusion. Nothing is ever repeated. So I do this bow, and then I stand up, and then I do this bow, and this bow is not a repetition. This is a whole new event. Each time is a whole new event. This is called practice of shikantaza.

[16:38]

Shikantaza is the practice of doing something for the first time that you've never done before with a totally fresh mind, with no residue. It's called doing in emptiness, activity within emptiness. Emptiness means nothing, I've never done this before. Every single moment is a brand new event. Although there is a past and possibly a future, it's not connected to the past and the future. Although there is some determination by what's happened in the past, it's an independent event which is called being born right now. So this is our practice of shikantaza.

[17:46]

And usually we think of shikantaza as the practice of sitting on the cushion with non-discriminating mind in emptiness. Every moment is a brand new moment. Every breath is a totally new event. So we realize how birth and death appear on each moment. And we let go of the previous moment and enter the present moment with nothing left, without any trace. So this is a unique experience and unique practice of reality. So in order to keep our practice fresh, you know, each stage of practice has its own unique conditions.

[18:57]

So when you're beginning practice, you have the problems of just dealing with the practice itself and how to enter it. And when you get to a certain plateau where you have some confidence in the practice and in yourself, that's a different set of problems. It's the problem of how to keep the practice fresh and new without getting stale. without letting it get old, and to keep, to rejuvenate yourself. We should rejuvenate our practice every day. Every day is a whole life cycle. So when you wake up in the morning, it's a brand new life. This is the essence of monastic practice. Because in monastic practice, you don't have a lot of new events entering into your life.

[20:02]

It's pretty much the same events over and over again, so to speak. but that those events over and over again, each day is totally different. So you begin to get a feeling for the intimacy of each moment because you're not distracted by new events. But in our daily life, you know, we're always distracted by the introduction of new events. And we forget easily our being. So our life has two aspects. One is the aspect of being. The other is the aspect of doing.

[21:06]

So being is simply Life itself is its own reason for existence. But in this realm of being, of doing, we feel that we have to accomplish something in our activity. So in the action of accomplishing something, we easily forget being, just simply being for the sake of itself. We might say, well, what's the reason for existence? What's my excuse for living? We do. Well, you don't need one. If we know how to, if we can appreciate our life just for what it is, we don't need to depend on accomplishments.

[22:23]

If we can really appreciate our life just as it is, that's life's greatest accomplishment. So in order to keep our practice vital and maintain our awareness, you know, it's not necessary to come to the Zen Dojo and sit every day, but we have these periods called Sashin, which vitalize our practice. Sometimes we think, oh, that's a long time, you know. My legs will hurt a lot. I could be doing other things. But this is our offering and this is really what keeps our practice vital and rejuvenates our practice.

[23:36]

Sitting for a long period in emptiness without having to accomplish something other than appreciating our pure existence. This is our offering to the world. If everyone in the world could simply appreciate their own pure existence and the pure existence of everyone else, people would be a lot happier. So sometimes we don't realize that how our practice affects the world around us and affects the world in far-reaching ways that we never can understand. We think sometimes, well, here I am sitting in isolation from the world, right?

[24:43]

But actually, there's no isolation. My old teacher, Suzuki Hiroshi, would say, you don't have to do anything special to help people. If your practice is sincere and genuine and continuous, whatever you do will be helping people. If you're not doing simply egotistical activity, whatever you do will be helping people. So it's important to bring light into the world, this light. And the way to bring this light into the world is to generate it.

[25:46]

Practice generates enlightenment, and enlightenment is the basis of practice. So Dogen says, practice and enlightenment are not two things. If we want to express enlightenment, you simply practice. We may or may not realize enlightenment. Enlightenment may be there without our realizing it, which is okay. Sometimes better. Because when we say, oh, I realize enlightenment, and you hang on to that, it's better to not have realized enlightenment at all. So it's important, you know, to realize that

[27:04]

We have been practicing from the beginning. And stepping into this practice helps us realize what our true practice is, has always been, if we have that affinity. And that's called having confidence. or faith. The translators don't like to use the word faith so much, but that's what it is. Faith is a very important aspect of practice. As a matter of fact, it's the foundation of practice. In Soto Zen, to have confidence or faith or realization that we are in the path of Buddha, that we are Buddha, and that sentient beings and Buddhas are not two different things. That's the basis of enlightenment. And then our activity naturally comes forth from that support.

[28:17]

and to appreciate and realize that our life is always supported by something. We may feel shaky or we may feel disturbed or doubtful or scared. But if you really are immersed in practice and have faith in the fact that we are Buddha and Buddha is always supporting our life, there's nothing to worry about. I sound like a Christian preacher maybe. That's okay. Hey, a lot of people feel that support no matter what their religion is. So it's important for us to feel that too. This is not just a new agey practice. It's deep confidence in our true being.

[29:31]

We are part and parcel of life itself. Our karma leads us in various directions. But our practice is to be able to, although we are the result of our karma, our practice is to cut through our karma. Zazen is to cut through our karma. When we sit in zazen, karma has very little effect on our life. When we get up, we go out in the world and start creating more karma. But we have the opportunity to come back and let go of it in Zazen. The more we can practice Zazen, the more we can let go of our karma.

[30:48]

The less effect our karma has on us. So this is it. I don't want to say this is a pitch for Sashi, but I want to say that it's my encouragement. not only is this something that we do for ourself, but, you know, people have parties, and they have get-togethers, and they have, you know, in various practices, they have picnics and so forth. We have Zazen. Well, we have this wonderful communion together. and support each other.

[31:52]

And when Sashin is over, no matter what was going on during Sashin, almost everybody feels really happy and refreshed. And that feeling of freedom before we step into the karmic milieu again. So I do want to encourage you to sign up for seishin because for all the reasons I was talking about. Do you have any questions? but not all the details, of how it is that our bodies don't end at our fingertips.

[33:03]

Our bodies? Don't end at our fingertips. Is that what I said? Yeah. Yes, you did. Well, that's a good, I like that. Well, you know, this is my body touching my body, right? Right here. So, because in the Heart Sutra it says, five skandhas in their own being are empty. They used to say, our first translation said, five skandhas are all empty. But then we changed it to five skandhas in their own being are all empty. Because own being means emptiness. Means everything is dependent on everything else. So, my body, I consider, you know, hands and feet and so forth, my body, but actually, my extended body, my extended family, is everything, because everything is supporting me.

[34:15]

This is why I can appreciate everything, because everything is my, it's a little selfish. Everything is myself. everything is supporting me, even though the table is a table, and I'm me, you know? And I can burn the table without feeling its effect. Right. Right. That's my problem. I still struggle with it. Yeah. But I can cut my fingernails without feeling the effect. But that doesn't mean that everything is not supporting me, and I'm supporting everything else. So, how we touch something, you know, how we treat things. Suzuki Hiroshi, when we first got the Page Street building in San Francisco, we put the zendo upstairs, no, a zendo downstairs, above the dining room.

[35:16]

which is backwards. They'd never do that in Japan. But because of circumstances, we put the zendo below. And then when people were in the zendo and other people were upstairs in the dining room, they'd scrape the chairs along the floor. And you could hear the scraping of the chairs along the floor. And Suzuki Ryoji said, you should always pick up chairs. You shouldn't scrape chairs on the floor. When you put a chair back, you lift it up and put it back into place. You don't scrape it along the floor, which is indicative of how we do things anyway, thoughtlessly and mindlessly, not taking care of what something is. He says, you shouldn't sit on the table, although people do, because the table has its function as a table. And when we treat the table in some other way, we're disrespecting the table. So we should have respect for things, for everything.

[36:22]

Everything has its function and its place. And to have respect for everything's function and place is to take care of yourself and touch all those things. John? Respecting your flute. Respecting? Your flute. Oh yes, by all means. I do respect my flute. And the way I touch my flute and handle it, you know, I sometimes think about that. Because it's just wooden tube with holes in it. That's all it is. Wooden tube with holes. But it's a magic, you know. And the way I hold my kotsu. I'm always conscious and aware of how I handle this. I never treat it as an object.

[37:23]

If you ever have occasion to use one of these, please don't treat it as an object because it's a living thing. And I put the life, it has a life of its own, but I bring it to life, and it brings me to life. So when I'm using this stick, the way I touch it and feel it and handle it reminds me of how to practice. To me, this is my teacher. We say this is the teaching stick, you know. But it's not so much for you as it is for me. Or it is as much for me as it is for you. Because it tells me, if I'm handling it in some disrespectful way, it lets me know that.

[38:28]

I've been aware maybe when I'm cutting my carrots and my celery that it is a new beginning. Yeah. How do you do that? Respect for everything. How do we respect whatever it is that we're dealing with? There is a way to do that for everything. You said that you could burn that table without feeling it, and that you might cut, I think that's what you said. I said I could do, oh. You could burn the table without feeling it, and that you might even cut your fingernails without feeling it. But I wonder if that's somehow like an inaudible sound or a type of light that we can't perceive.

[39:52]

So it's beyond our perception, but I think what you're saying is to respect it even if it's beyond our perception. Yeah. I would say 99.9% of everything is beyond our perception. What we perceive is so minimal as to be insignificant, but it's significant for us, you know, but in the larger sense. So, you know, when you cut vegetables, they scream, but we don't hear it necessarily. But they're, you know, ouch, or something that's there. But, so that's why when we cut vegetables, you should be respectful of them. You know, when you're working in the garden, you're respectful of all the plants and how you handle them and how you treat them.

[40:54]

And I've always felt like farm animals have such, are so disrespected. I can't believe, it's hard for me to visualize why farm animals are so disrespected. But they are. I think they're treated that way because if people really respected them, they wouldn't kill them. And so in order to be able to kill them, you have to have some disrespect, you have to create a disrespect in order to justify your killing them. Well, yeah, that's right. We have to call these people insurgents when they're really just protecting themselves in order to kill them. Yeah. Oh, sure. Why not? I don't know a lot about the Native American traditions, but I do know that in one way or another,

[41:54]

they're known for having respect for the animals they hunt and kill. Yes, of course. They have chants about it, which I find thrilling. It incorporates respect into even the killing of something, which of course isn't wanton. And it includes respect. And I also want to throw in that Akinroshi told the story about a student of his who killed a cockroach, but not before saying, better luck next time. That's a good place to leave it. But I just want to say one thing. Like at Tassajara, I've told this before, in the old days, there were many flies. In the summer, the flies were just unbearable. And people would, you know, ask Suzuki Roshi, what do we do about the flies? He said, well, we have to kill them before they kill us. So we made, got these gallon jugs and put bait in them and the flies just, you know, into the gallon jug and then dig a pit and burn the flies.

[43:12]

But first we chant the Heart Sutra. So there was, you know, it's not like we're doing something mean, we're doing something necessary, but we do it with respect. So that's the difference.

[43:28]

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