On Breathing 

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breath
to save some things to you
i got a message that
he would be good if i gave up
description of the course
to be offered here
this fall in november and december
hi i want to discuss with you
since many of you
come to these classes regularly
the prospect of this autumn man
beyond
i confess to you that earlier this summer
yeah
i was informed about the number of people who were registered or who were in signed up to come to this
this class
and when i saw when i saw that i didn't see the people but i saw the names i mean i saw the number i heard the number
and when i heard the number i thought oh i guess people are losing interest in these classes
i wonder if i should keep coming over to berkeley since there seems to be
waning interest
and the previous class also was rather see relatively small so i'm sensitive to when there's it seems to be a dip
and particularly when there seems to be a trend towards less interest
in the end many people signed up after quite you know like in the last week or so maybe some of you noticed that you signed up
are you didn't sign up and then you sign up later
but anyway this this group is fine with me but
two thirds of this group
and then what happened this group especially if it's if i if i sense a waning interest and i think maybe if i offer class less often people would be more interested maybe just too many classes
so i think about such things
particularly when i'm
contemplating my breathing in traffic

i sometimes wonder what am i doing in this traffic jam is it really good idea to be going over to berkeley
so ah
that's to say to you that i'm sensitive to your participation i'm happy with this group
and then i'm thinking of the fall and part of me thinks
you know
we can go a lot deeper into the meditation on breathing
when there's a lot of subtleties which we could and refinements which we could contemplate
on our way to
developing a very subtle and refined body and mind and
i'm kind of thinking of going that direction
oh and also this fall at green gulch i'm
ah been asked to lead a practice period and i'm also going to i think they're emphasize i set the stage of posture and breathing for the meditation practice during the practice period
but i also am saying this to you and
if you would like to have me off or something else here
if you do not wish to continue studying this meditation on breathing i welcome your feedback that to help me decide what to offer here because i am i if you don't want me to than you probably want if you don't if you're not interested you might not come to
the class and if you don't come to class then i might think you're not interested
yes
the reason for switching to tuesday's because the green golf schedule has changed
and they yeah they they switch things around there for the sake of the
guess program
it's on tuesday but in the spring and summer probably
probably move back to thursday
but if you tell me that you can't come on tuesday that would be good for me to know
i don't know what i can do about our at this point other than cancel the class if you can't come so i'm just tell you that i
i i'm using the breath to tell you these things
and so if you want me to keep working on this meditation on breathing
going into more
aspects of it
beyond next week let me know if you don't want to be rather hear some other kind of teaching that we know that to please
i'm glad we have one more class
and in case i forget to say the next class
i think would be great if we all continued to take care of
our our two bodies
our
postural flesh and blood but past body and are breathing body i think of relative good if we continued to observe how these two bodies
i work with each other i
i will probably talk more about that tonight but i just want to say it's really important to me that we continue the practice beyond the class
it's after next week they'll be a break and the glasses so i hope you
i hope you're interested enough
i want you to be interested enough in values see the value in this meditation enough that you'll take care of
yes

thank you for that encouragement
ah
so we have been we've been talking quite a bit i say again that basic suggestion here is to
ah had this basic frame
of attention
which is
the the appearance of a body in the appearance of breath and then to observe how the breath
conditions or influences the body to watch how the breath body conditions they
postural
body
and then as you see that you also get to see how the posture conditions the breathing
how the breathing kind of makes requests of the posture and once the posture
ha receive that
request from the breathing the posture then offers something back to the breathing
the posture facilitates the breathing after the breathing influences the posture so we've been meditating on that
and the in in poly
when the buddha talked about this relationship
ah the buddhist spoke of up
what's insane poly
kaja smirky who pestana coyote me his body smitty is
no actually in poly at saudi kayan thought the potato pestana in sanskrit kaja smitty group pestana smitty or saute means mindfulness
or
memory
and we pestana means a foundation or frame
frame of reference in the in practice
the word kayak
i also means like a m
a collection
it means body khayyam his body but it also means a collection
it's actually kind of a a collection in other words it's an idea
so we're actually meditating on our idea of the body and our idea of breathing and then our idea
of how the breathing and the body are interacting in our idea of now
an idea of here
and
the our idea of here and now and the body breathing is
perhaps our most basic frame of reference we can also have the idea of the future and other bodies
and the past and other bodies and other breaths and other ideas those are other frames of reference and we don't
we don't in any way disparage them but they arm
somewhat derivative and we can get lost in them but if we do get lost in them as we have mentioned from our own experience many of us have realized when were lost in thoughts of planning in the future and reflecting on the past which are part of our life
if we get lost in that stuff it's going to come back to the basic idea of now here body breathing
and then one when we are well settled here in this breathing body now
then from that place
thinking about other things will be more auspicious or thinking of other things will be more auspicious auspicious in the sense of conducive to success at enlightenment auspicious means conducive to success
so it's not that we don't think of other things besides our body breathing but those things those contemplation of those thoughts
when they come from this presence
i'm more likely to be
what we want them to be namely beneficial to everybody
remind me and later not too much later
but remind me a little bit later about making decisions
but not did not quite this limits layer little layer than this later
now back to the breathing i want to emphasize on now that we're we're talked we've been talking about meditating on the body breathing the brett interacting with the body nine just want to say that the way that the breath
influences are conditions the body
it's we can look at it in different ways
the conditioning process involves
involves in a sense this is this isn't the realm of ideas a body and breath and now
in that realm there's the idea of something conditioning or influencing something else
so there is a conditioner
and the breath is a conditioner of the body the breath is a conditioner of the posture
and then there is the condition
which is that which has been conditioned
and the breath can be both conditioner and condition and also the breath can be conditioning
so this conditioner condition and conditioning
up and the breath can be all three of those and it can be all three of those right now
on this exhale the breath can be all three
and the body
can be all three two
when the breath is the conditioner
then the body is often the condition
and the way the bodies a condition
is a result of the conditioner engaged in the process of conditioning
so as we exhale
there's conditioning
conditioned
this conditioner conditioning conditioned
the breath and the body part in this conditioner condition conditioning think and that all happening on every this all happens in every part
have every exhale
so part
of realizing the totality or the wholeness of trusting and exhale
part of the totally trusting the exhale is to trust the totality of the exhale
an exhaled breath has this
influence or
condition and quality and it's conditioning the body and there's a process of conditioning and that's going on in the exhale
at the same time
so again part of being totally with the breathing resembled exhale is in each moment of the exhale appreciated that dynamic relationship of the body in the breathing
another part of
totally trusting and exhale is to trust to make life simple the beginning
the middle and end of the exhale that's another part of
totally trusting and exhale
if you trust the beginning of an exhale that's pretty good as pretty good it
i mean like people don't notice even the beginning of an exhale
a good share at the time almost everybody occasionally noses notices and exhale
like very probably just noticed that one
but not not talking about anybody else let's just talk about me
i may not notice the beginning
middle and then the next hill
but like i said just to make it simple if you're watching an inhale as it interacts the inhale body
and the inhale collect the collection of the inhales there is quite a few inhales on each inhale and there's quite a few exhales on each exhale in a way
he doesn't like to exhale isn't happening until it's finished
i would say the exhale has
it's a process so the beginning of exhale counts as part of the exhale to make sense if not like on not exhaling they didn't finish yet
i am exhaling but i'm not done exhaling and i'm still not done with exhaling i'm still not done with exhaling and i'm still not done with that sailing and i'm still not done with exhaling and now i'm just damaged
now that was it
so another part of totally trusting exhale is to trust the beginning a middle and end
and of course between the beginning in the middle this
there's the
halfway between the beginning in the middle in other words as lots of moments
on a normal exhale is quite a few moments there
and same with inhales there's quite a few moments and and inhale
and part of being totally trusting some process is to trust the whole process or to learn to trust the whole process
so these are
some ways to
deepen of meditation from simply the beginning where we are actually just watching
exhales and now i'm rewatching inhale
exhale and pretty soon i'm gonna watch it inhale
does that and then there's watching the relationship between exhale and the body
an inhale and the body
and then watching how the beginning of the inhale affects the body the middle of the inhale of x the body and end of the and halifax the body
what are the beginning of the exhale influences the body the middle of the exhale an end of the exhale influences the body
and then in addition i think again to remind you observe the way short breaths
condition the body
the way short exhales and short inhales condition the body
the where the body conditions short exhales and short inhales
and the way long exiles and long inhales condition of i
and the way the body
response and therefore conditions the breathing
on a long
for a short and of courses in between
so these are a number of ways to move from watching the basic relationship too
making the observation more whole more total
and sometimes it's translated as
breathing with the whole body
but when people when when buddhist as a whole body
it could be understood as a whole postural body and i'm not saying it doesn't mean that
but apparently the first way the buddha means that when the buddha says breed with the whole body
is the buddha means breathe with the whole body at the breath
breathes with the beginning middle and end of the breath
breathe with awareness of how the breath is conditioning
conditioner
and how the bodies conditioned for the condition of the breathing this is the breathing the the
the whole body kind of breathing
and another waiter is sometimes also translated as
ha ha
i'm contemplating or observing all bodies
so one way to say is contemplating the total body breathing
the total body at the breath but another way is to say all bodies in this sense of watch how the different breath bodies in the different posture or bodies watched them all all the different varieties the beginning body the middle body the and body the short body the lawn body
all those bodies to pay attention to all of them is to move the practice the basic practice into our
more total practice
which is called
breathing with the whole body or
breathing with the whole body of the breath
we're contemplating the whole breathing process
and again i would say that this total breathing
is getting close to totally trusting the breath but not there's another step which brings the breath
practice the total trust
and at that point
we are ready to
the meditation is ready to leap
leap into wisdom
ah kei i see elaina worked have a question yes

how does this meditation affect the nervous system
well here's a story this is a story
no story about how this is a story cake this the first story is no story can tell you actually how the breathing
it is affecting the nervous system
but still there can be general stories about
you know the abstraction of the effect and
so a number of things can be said that is
the when you pay attention to your breathing that type of attention transformed your nervous system
if you don't pay attention to your breathing that type of attention transforms your nervous system
whatever you pay attention to and whatever you feel about it or think about it
transform your nervous system or nervous system is constantly being transformed by the way
ah are conscious activity is
functionally
so somehow we're in a room talking about paying attention to
breathing
and is possible that while we're talking about breathing some of us are actually paying attention to our breathing and paying attention to your breathing transforms your nervous system
period now if you get skillful at paying attention to your breathing your nervous system gets transformed in such a way that your body and your breathing and your mind become more and more relaxed
buoyant joyful flexible
playful and ready for wisdom
and this is possible because of the transformation of the nervous system by this conscious activity which the nervous system supports
how this process goes is ninety five percent unconscious
because ninety five percent of what's going on with our cognitive activity is unconscious
i'm watching my hand move right now and i'm hearing myself talk but i am not actually i have i cannot figure out how to make my hand or like this
but i'm aware that it's happening and i can even think that i'm making you go this way but
i have received teachings which said i do not make my hand i do not consciously moved my hand through the air like this
the when the the the the amazing thing i've moved my hand like this is much more complex than i could ever consciously orchestrate
but yet it is orchestrated
how my how i imagine how i come to be able to imagine our present right now how i imagined how i come to imagine a now that seems like a now i couldn't i cannot consciously figure out how i'd do that
and but there's a teaching which comes into this now where i'm living
and this now or i'm talking to you which says focusing being pretty much regularly in touch with now transformed the nervous system
in such a way that there will be more opportunities to be frequently in touch with the idea of now
and that again will influence the cognitive process which is ninety five percent on conscious to support more awareness of now and and now the meditation on the breath now is the basic meditation which transforms our cognitive process or
unconscious cognitive process to support more meditation on
breathing body now
and being centered in this breathing body now makes possible the most effective
complex activities
complex maze more complex than just a body breathing
all for example planning
so i'll do the planning thing now
ha
we plan and many of us are aware consciously aware when you're planning
but most people think
that bake are going to consciously figure out how to make a good plan
or we are decision-making you even sometimes people may sometimes actually people make plans and don't feel too stressed but to make a plan and then to decide whether you're going to implement it or not or make up ten glands and decide which one to do i
i am the beneficiary of the opportunity to hear many people come and talk to me about making decisions and
they're often very stressed when they're making decisions
and they probably coming to me because they're stressed and i think maybe i could help them make the decision and help them with their stress and i have a story that i can
and the way i help them is by suggesting that they come into the present and for example pay attention to their posture and breathing
most people think that if they're have a decision let's say there's two options are three
that they should think about which one is best
and i don't say no you shouldn't
and i don't say no you should
i say
where do i say
ha yeah right i said trust everything to inhalation and exhalation see you already got three options here nobody have to tell you the three you already think that you'd like to figure out which ones best nobody has to tell you that this is orchestrated by
your unconscious your cognitive unconscious it made those three up and it knows how and it knows how to support thinking about them and it's going to
however
the best decision will come
i suggest from a place of being grounded in posture and breathing
and most people when they have three question three options and also they have the idea that
maybe a little bit of an idea that the in the present thinking of these but actually mostly they're not in the present thing of these and are thinking of these in the future and their little bit aware that they're feeling really anxious
they think i don't like i don't have time to be
trusting everything to posture breathing i have to make i have to think about which one of these is best
of course will understand that
but that approach
might come up that book that approach might come up with choosing one of these
but i would say if you whichever one you choose i'm saying this whichever one you choose
things will go best
if that decision arises from totally trusting inhalation and exhalation and you can ended in one of those alternatives can be
called the decision while trusting posture and breathing
hmm
ah you can you wait until i'm finished with this nervous system
so
there's the there's many stories about what makes the best decisions i heard that the best decisions are decisions where there's a diversity of opinions about which is the best decision
that could be a diversity of people are within your own mind a diversity of opinions also
interesting posture and breathing
my experiences trusting posture and breathing
does not try to reduce the number of different views about anything
it just doesn't let the different beers ah
disturbed
but totally trusting partner in breathing the different views don't disturb the situation
they are conditions for the decision as usual
but in a context of
he presents with this breathing body
and com and flexibility and so
so
they
huh mindfulness of breathing
has it has influence on the body mindfulness of breathing
simultaneously transport
mindfulness of breathing transforms the body which means it transforms the conscious body you can watch it it transforms the
body which were not conscious of which is
the nervous system it transforms parts of the body which are not the nervous system because the parts of the body that are not the nervous system
share the opportunities and misfortunes of the nervous system
so it transformed the nervous system and transform the unconscious body and mind and it transforms the conscious mind
whatever kind of attention you do so the question is which type of attention you wished to promote because whatever kind of tension you use it simular it it it's transform me your unconscious body mind which transforms your conscious body and mind and then
with your conscious body mind is where you apply your attention we can't really apply our attention to our unconscious mind
but we can apply our attention to our conscious mind breath body or rather body breath mind we can and that transformed our unconscious vast unconscious body which supports more meditation
the more we devote ourselves to meditation the more vast unconscious body mind supports our conscious meditative activity
until the effects on our unconscious mind or soul
are sufficient to the point of supporting
a radical
abandonment of certain types of conscious activity
like
clean
like greed hate and delusion
which are supported conscious greed hate and delusion are supported by unconscious cognitive process which is the result of past types of attention
so to make a long story short tux totally trusting your breathing process
and totally trusting me trusted to the point where you really encounter the fullness the full subtlety and refinement of breathing body mind that total trusting transforms the unconscious
to make a conscious mind that's willing to not have any agreed eight or delusion anymore
that's willing to actually feel okay about not having any even though it's really strange am i okay i don't have any greed hate jewelry today at all right
some people will actually tell you know you you're not all right
we like the old the old guy
we like you when you weren't greedy
you are more fun in any old days
you won't go to bars with us anymore
or when you come you you you interfere with certain programs we have in mind
so that's how that's that's a story about how this practice transformed the nervous system dash the body
and again nobody's not just a nervous system but that the body is you know them
the fingernails are not exactly the nervous system
bones are not not necessarily a nervous system as parts of the body which aren't the nervous system but the nervous system and other parts are very close friends and the cognitive process is not the least bit separate from from the non cognitive parts of the body
the bodies both cognitive and non-cognitive and most of the cognitive we don't expect the fingernails to be conscious
we don't expect read it we don't expect to know what it's like to be a fingernail
and fingernails actually have trouble telling us what it's like to be a fingernail because as far as i know fingernails do not think they possess they you know the different parts of the fingernail but other parts of our mind do think that they own things so then there's somebody there
and that part is inseparable from the nervous system and the nervous system is constantly being transformed
yes

did you say that our nervous systems isn't is genetically directed
oh defective genetically defective

or perhaps for a inclined towards greed hate and delusion that's a really common one most people's genetic endowment is that facilitates them being greedy ignorant
and
angry
those are genetically supported
and most people think that but the buddha taught that that these greed hate and delusion process are genetically supported
nour the nervous system runs on janet on genes runs on chromosomes runs on
dna and rna and aids and lot of or stuff like that
bacteria all that wonderful stuff makes great a delusion
so the buddhist teaching that there's a way and it and in the realm of greed hate and delusion create a delusion exists in the conscious mind it doesn't exist in the unconscious mind as far as i know
but the unconscious mind totally supports it because the unconscious mind is the results of greed hate and delusion and it supports further great hate and delusion however the unconscious mind is also the rely the results of kindness and patience and generosity and it's also the reason
salt of totally trusting your inhalation and exhalation if you happen to be involved in that
the unconscious mind is supporting great a delusion and the unconscious mind is genetically involved
so the border would agree with that i would say
but the buddha's is also saying you can transform your genetic situation the genes can be transformed the dna can be transformed the dna is transformed by conscious life conscious life
trip effects
the nervous system effects the genetic activity than generic functioning
it's now being i think proposed by certain research that if you think certain ways you can just you can disturb
the way genetic activity is going on if you're stressed and your conscious life that can interfere with the way
jeans are copied right
keep refining that ah how are we that stress mix it interferes with some normal genetic functioning
so and lack of stress promotes the effective effective copying of stop the sport that's going stuff's being copied all the time and that caught in the stuff that's being copied into stuff that runs a nervous system
so it's do if you wanna make good copies
one way you can contribute to that is by meditating on your posture and breathing
yes
what's your name again
cecile
is there a song i could see you
sissy
yeah great thank you
yes cecile

you're welcome
huh
yeah that could be your intention
pessoa that's an in my dermatologist
ha
it's if she and i don't know actually portuguese but the next time i see lasker and i'll ask if she knows the part watch the news pessoas
ha
fernando pessoa okay yes so tell us about ferdinand
huh
huh
hey again

yeah well to share as you said about the nose in the back
so if you watch here breathing condition your posture you may discover that you kind of do have a nose in your back the years that your spine does kind of
inhale and exhale he does it affected by your breathing particularly when you're breathing gets deep
more you know your back step in a sense be resonating with the breathing more
before the i see sarah question but i want to mention something also if i may may i john
really

i actually i'm going to wait a little longer until you tell you feel even better about me talking about whatever this is i'm going to talk about yeah
a while

dress your question please
the

i have not there's another fake there's another there's some more phases to this to ensuring skip this sketch in
discussion
totally trusting so what i've done so far as watch the body and breath interact iran and then watch how they do with with the with the inhalation exhalation long and short breath and then i'm also killing in watch how the whole body which
means the whole body of the breath watch that and there's another phase but i'm going to bring it up next week
if you can you can go ahead and leave any time you don't have to you don't have to fulfill the prerequisites just leap you may be able to get to the total trusting without this next phase that i'm going to talk about
but here's what i was gonna say before you ask your question which you are holding on to him but willing to let go of
and that was i asked at the end of class last time if you would try to
contemplate your breathing body
as you drove home and some people did in one person and i was one of the people who did by the way and then somebody sent me an email telling me about not driving home too much but some problems she had with her breathing which you started noticing her breathing
i want to pay what i found when i was driving home i was watching my breathing and i noticed discomfort in my chest
i wasn't expecting i thought i got this is gonna just be not only fun
like identifies him be comfortable but it wasn't comfortable i actually felt discomfort in my chest
unexpectedly and which doesn't sound good
but
that's what i found that's what that's how my breath condition my body and i was paying attention so i noticed that's how my breath was conditioning my body and i can tell a story about that like my breath interacting with my body in the car
he was kind of like there was some kind of stress there
and i work with that as i was driving and
i kept watching it and i wasn't trying to make the discomfort go away
i was actually kind of sort of enjoying the surprise of this
of this challenge of this discomfort
and in
and i continued to watch this and it yet done
it worked out in and i just you know that the discomfort went away and then i continued to watch
the breath process that's something i noticed and then someone wrote me an email tell talking about irritable breath and irritable breath could be understood as breath it's irritating or irritation about the breath either way what do you do
do a bud
about irritable breath
well in my case
and i think i've towards just before i've mentioned another classes
generosity ethics patience and diligence and diligence is a big part of this class i'm trying to degenerate i'm trying to inspire diligence for this practice of mindfulness of breathing i'm trying to inspire the
aspiration in all of us to do this practice i'm trying to inspire joy at the prospect of devoting your attention to your breathing body
at that diligence is based on generosity ethics and patience
so as you get into meditating on your breathing if you run into pain discomfort distress
go back
two generosity ethics and patience
say thank you and i would actually kind of did say thank you and that came when that pain came i kind of to thank you like wow this i didn't expect this challenge this will be interesting to tell them next week
so i'm not going back and say well i've followed my breathing and i had this great time driving home was very comfortable that all this is an interesting twist so i can tell him that i did not get impatient with that stress i didn't
i actually did what i'm telling you i practice i i welcomed it i welcome it
i little bit like that i didn't have to like it but i did little bit like it and i i know i welcome that i liked but i liked to only because i thought it was interesting and unexpected but still then i went back to this dealing with it generously and i was careful i didn't i didn't hate it i didn't slander it i didn't say stupid stress and
the chest
i didn't say lousy meditation and breathing
yes
no that was part of was part of also i kind of wanted you to see did it did it cause any problem with the driving and i i do not find that following my breathing when i'm driving i do not find observing my body being breathe i do not find it distracts my driving i
generally find it enhances my presence because i do this in the present
this makes me more in the present and i drive the car in the present and it works out that we've worked this out so that this idea of the presence is actually this ideas are really good place to operate the car
it's not the real present the real present is worth your cognitive unconscious is working with it's actually watching the road in figuring out how to steer the car
and then puts us this idea of a present up there in which we are conscious mind is also driving the car the unconscious mind is not following the breathing
it's figuring out how to actually breed it's actually figuring it out you know how to work the lungs it's working the diaphragm it's doing all that stuff
very well it where it's really good it's really trustworthy this conscious mind is not so trustworthy but it's the place of evolution the unconscious mind is not causing itself to evolve as far as i know if it is great i have nothing to do with it my job is in the conscious mind where there's a conscious
idea of presence where i drive the car and i follow my breathing and it worked out fine and that presence transforms
the conscious mind which continues to practice their so i'm basically saying if you fight if you're if you're meditating and you notice irritable breath i'm saying be generous towards it be ethical with it be careful of it be gentle with it be gentle with the breath that's it
irritable
be gentle with the brett that's not gentle be gentle be gentle with my breath that's not refined that's not subtle be gentle and careful and generous and patient with the rough crude breath that irritating you
that's what i would say to do with that that's what i aspire to do if i run into rough irritable breath that's how i practice with it
and then if i can practice with it and be patient with it with the discomfort of it then i can like think about how wonderful would be if i could be
totally trusting this rough irritable breath
if i got referred old breath the buddhist says
i breathe in conscious of a rough irritable breath with the whole body
now if you do that your breath will not stay rough it will become refined but not because you trying to get rid of the rough breath and get a refined breath
if you've got a rough breath and you practices way it will become refine if you've got to refine breath it will become more refined this is not about trying to make your breath more refined it's about being generous
ethical patient and diligent about observing and being diligent about of by observing is enhanced by being generous ethical impatient now you're diligent and you're gonna be kind for your breath no matter what is like
and if you aspire to not not not necessarily going to be kind you aspire to be kind you aspire to be whole to be told him with whatever breath
he's given
and you understand the teaching is
to be conscious of breathing with your whole body with the whole body of the breath that's the teaching and then the next part i'll tell you next week about the next part
you're not forced to come to class next week because charlie might take it but the tape recorder might not work so
he's gonna be a burning man so
pour some water on him with you
okay yes the jv hand raised yes
hum know
huh

thank thanks for
thank you for the confession and noticing that event the basic thing of web from the board sought for ethical training basic thing is
receive a precepts so supposedly we're in this class were receiving the precept were receiving the precept from maybe the buddha's hopefully receiving the precepts
correctly we're trying to receive the precepts about breathing meditation correctly and then
we might aspire to practice them not as we each time we received the precept
we have a new understanding and then we aspire to practice that one
and then so first thing has received the precept for example of breathing
aspire to practice to your current understanding of it and then the next thing is sometimes you fail
at the precept which you aspire to practice
and if you fail at the precept you aspire that you have received and you aspire to practice if you fail you may feel
regret
embarrassment
sorrow
ha
well you you have to kill judgment and or in notice that a failed
so when you when you receive a precept and aspire to it then judgments involved in seeing whether or not you practiced it
there is judgment but you can't and can judge well i think i didn't try i think i did practice it so and i'm not sorry and when i judges that i'm doing the practice which are inspired to i don't feel i don't feel sorry i don't regret i don't regret that i paid attention to what i just said
i don't i don't regret that i would just kind to that person according to my idea anyway
and i do regret that i was inattentive and i didn't pay attention and you know i regret that because not just in somebody might regretted it even if they didn't aspire to practice it but if you receive a precept in you aspire to practice it and then you judge that you forgot to practice
it
and if you feel sorrow about it and regret
then then what and what sometimes happens the next thing is you go back and aspire again you receive it and aspire to it again and then sometimes you sick you judge that you succeed in you're happy and then you receive it in aspire he received major remember it
remember what are you my body breathing here now in this dream world
in this meditation i understand going to transform my cognitive unconscious to support more of this meditation and going to lead me directly to nirvana and benefiting are being so i'm happy to do this
home now i think and i forgot and i forgot for a long time and i'm sorry and but i
i wish to receive the precept again in practice it and am i'm happy when i do it and i'm
stressed for sorrowful when i don't but the type of sorrow which makes me want to go back to work is called repentance the type of sorrow which makes me not want to go back to work
is failing at another precept
it's failing at generosity ethics it's failing at ethics because part of ethics is repenting successfully
it's an ethical shortcomings to repent in such a way that you want to give up repenting
like i repented and i never want to repent again well that's not the right kind of repentance the kind of repentance that remain as a kind of dependence where you said that wasn't fun but i i feel inspired because i'm doing exactly the same thing that all great spiritual beings have done they have aspire to something for
went back to work
i have that kind of sir i have the kind of go back to work kind of some kind of like i really do want to do this that kind of sorrow i really don't not want to do it
i'm really sorry that i did that halfway that's not the way i want to do it
i don't want to turn the door half their
i want to turn the door knob completely there i don't want to listen to somebody's a little bit i want to listen to him all the way i don't want to breathe out halfway i want to breathe with the whole body of the breath that's the way i want to breathe i want to leap into wisdom that's the way i want to be
and i was not wholehearted there and i'm sorry but i want to try again that's repentance and that's part of ethics and that's part of compassion repentance is part of compassion
an effective ethics is part of compassion ineffective ethics is not
i mean ineffective repentance ineffective sorrow is not the type of sorry want want to tweak it a little bit so it makes us want to practice more to come back to stairs question
nuts and bolts okay

no i
no i thought it
oh i thought it was just i am
here's what i here's what i think you know here's what i think this is not in bolts again if i don't pay attention to my
breathing body i may not notice irritable breath
i made actually heck they have discomfort in my chest but if i don't pay attention to how my body is breathing i may not even notice the discomfort
when you start to become aware you start to notice some discomfort said you don't even notice because you're speeding ahead so far same with
he worked as a basic thing that oftentimes weren't going really fast we don't notice that we're afraid we don't notice we're sad we don't know if we have tension in our body
we don't notice that our breath is asking us to adjust our past year to make more space for it so i will actually for saying that when i paid attention my posture and and my breathing i noticed i think something a little off about my posture
and i gradually worked it out to find a posture that allowed me to stay in the seats in generally in the seat and accommodate my breathing in such a way that my breathing and my body were kind of like feeling okay with it wasn't a heart attack
and i also notice quite frequently that if i don't pay attention to the breath going out of my nose i almost never notice any irritation of the breath around my nose
but when i pay attention to the brethren on my nose i often notice often quite often notice a little irritation around the the noses as i'm breathing
and i think he's right think
is that irritations there
and i just don't notice it because i'm not paying attention to it
and the furthest thing is if i if my breath would become more subtle and refined the irritation would be relieved
so when the breath is rough and your for example i don't know what if you're in a boxing match in your breath as rough you hardly notice it
he got other things that are more stressful
but if you if if you could cut out all the information about the boxing match and just watch your breathing you might notice this is very stressed breathing you know jonathan if you didn't pay attention you weren't worried anymore about getting hit are the being pummeled or pummeling he just watched your breathing when you're in a boxing match you might fly
and it was very rough and irritable
what most people can't notice that when they're when they're boxing
but sometimes you can and those are like these great moments of enlightenment when somebody's involved in a very rough situation they noticed the ear the roughness and they find a subtle suddenness there even in a situation where usually as situation very rough and they they find peace there but it's it's it's pretty hard
did you paul that from
yeah

yes

okay
haha

huh

huh
i just heard you describe meditation on the interaction the into the interpenetration the intimacy of the breath body and their posture body as i heard you just talk about that's what we're taught
you by is to meditate on not kind of thing
and just observe it exactly
just observe it watch that watching that so we say trust everything to the inhalation and exhalation another way to say it is study everything
to while inhaling and exhaling
learn everything about inhaling and exhaling learn everything about how the posture body and breath body those two bodies learn everything about holiday danced together
there is in in in the complete trust their his surrender of half heartedness
there is surrender of greed hate and delusion
that's why we're proposing this
in the in the thoroughness of this study greed hate and delusion will drop away and will leap into the treasury of life
and you just gave one example of something to study which your seem to be up for study
thank you very much