As a result of my recent flu and sore throat, I have a little cough, and so maybe my voice isn't so strong today. But my knee is getting better. And I'm still favoring it by not bowing down, but it is getting better. Today I want to talk about our concentration. If you look around, you'll notice that when we do things, we're always bound someplace.

[01:05]

We're going somewhere. And when we come to the Zendo, it looks like we stopped going someplace. But two things are going on. One thing is that we're going somewhere, and the other thing is that we're not going anywhere. One side is that although we're going somewhere, we are where we are. We're always where we are. And it's real easy to see ourselves going someplace. We always have someplace to go. and we're always doing something. But at the same time, we're always where we are, just where we are. And we may not think about that so much ordinarily in our daily life.

[02:11]

But when we come to the Zen Do, and we sit Sazen, and we do the various activities around our practice, Our concentration is to slow down and pay attention to not only where we're going, but where we are. So when we're concentrated on where we're going, as well as, or when we're concentrated on where we are, as well as on where we're going, then that kind of concentration is called samadhi. And when we sit, it's easy to become aware of that samadhi, because we are more than where we're going.

[03:24]

We are where we are more than we're going where we're going. We're going to where we are, is what we're doing. But it's pretty hard to go to where we are, very hard to go to where we are. It's easier to go to where we're going. So, But in Zazen, we know that we're going to where we are. We know that. Somewhere, we know that, even though it's very difficult. Because even in the midst of going to where we are, when things get tough, we want to go to where we're going. So we get out of where we are. It's hard to stay where we are, to be where we are. So same thing happens when we in our activities Say when we're serving food, you know or making for preparing food or Walking in and out of the Zindo There are certain acts in which we become very conscious of Going to where we are but

[04:51]

We tend to forget that in the connecting phases of our life. Connecting phase of our life would be we stand up and then we go out the door for a break. That's a connecting phase. The walking from here to the door. We don't consider that as being somewhere, usually. We consider that as going somewhere. So our life, you could maybe look at it as a movie. And a movie has a reel and a tape and frames. And each frame is a little action. And our life is actually going on in that way.

[05:57]

Each little frame is part of the action. So because we don't stop the frames, we feel that life is continuous. Life looks to us like it's continuous and just keeps going on and on. One movement coming out of the previous movement. But if you look at it very carefully, each one of those frames is being someplace. Just being. an act in the midst of being itself. And this kind of, when we're concentrated on each act as being, each act as being itself, we call that one-act samadhi.

[07:16]

Samadhi of just one action. And when we practice, our practice is a samadhi of one action, moment after moment. So on the one hand, life looks continuous. And on the other hand, it's this action, this act, this act, this act, this act. Each act each moment's act being completely fulfilled in itself. So, if we look for fulfillment over a long period of time, within the flow of time, it will take us a long time to find it.

[08:19]

because we feel that life is continuous. So if we're going to find fulfillment, we have to find each moment as being completely full. Each moment's activity being completely full. Each moment's activity as a beginning and an end and a middle. But that's difficult to find. Difficult to find the beginning middle and end of each activity. But if you concentrate and pay attention to each moment's activity, even though it has no beginning, middle, and end, at the same time it does have a beginning, a middle, and an end. But beginning and middle and end is not graspable.

[09:23]

You can't take hold of it, but you can only be it. You can't keep it or follow it, as they say. You can only be it, moment by moment. So if we are going to find our satisfaction in our life, or our fulfillment, or feeling full, we have to find it on each moment. We may feel that good and bad circumstances create a good and a bad life. Good and bad circumstances are just the scenery of our life. Our actual life just takes place moment after moment, regardless of whether things are going well or badly, or whether we judge them one way or another.

[10:43]

Our life is just there. So good and bad, although we are affected by those ideas, our life is different than that. It doesn't depend on whether things are good or bad. So when we sit in Zazen all day, it's just moment after moment, going to ourself, meeting ourself, settling down moment after moment, just pure existence.

[12:01]

Each moment's activity is its own great moment. At the same time, nothing special. At the same time, magnificent, regardless of what's happening. This is how we find our freedom in our practice. And it's what our practice is about. It's kind of like time.

[13:07]

Sometimes we compare it to a clock. 12 o'clock, 1 o'clock, 2 o'clock, 3 o'clock. But time is not 1 o'clock, 2 o'clock, 3 o'clock, and so on. It's just a way we have of dealing with it. Very convenient for us. Sometimes not convenient. So when it's one o'clock, we know something about one o'clock and we can identify one o'clock. And it helps us to order our life in some way. So we know where the beginnings and endings are. So time is very helpful. But timelessness exists within that time. Just like our composure exists within our activity.

[14:20]

Composure is the ability to be where we are. It's also sometimes called patience. patience in its most fundamental form is called composure, which is called the ability to be right where we are, no matter what the circumstances are, and to abide there without being moved. So that's why we practice Zazen. When we practice Zazen, our legs hurt and our anxiety level sometimes rises and various things go on in our mind and sometimes we would rather be on the go.

[15:34]

But Instead, we concentrate. So this machine, you know, everybody comes, each one of us comes from some environment. Yesterday, we were all doing something different. And we were all going about our business with our individual thoughts and our individual goals and our worries and our anxieties and our thoughts. And today we all come together to come to ourselves. And at first it's not so easy. because we still have yesterday's residue, you know?

[16:45]

And so as we begin to settle into Sashin, Sashin itself draws our concentration. we may feel that we're not so well-concentrated. And it's true. We're not so well-concentrated yet. But as we, in spite of ourselves, the difficulties that we have will help us to be more concentrated. So as Sashin becomes more difficult, we also become more concentrated naturally. And the concentration becomes stronger and stronger in spite of ourselves. That's what's so wonderful about doing something like this together. It's very powerful for everybody. We wonder, what is it that makes it difficult about something like Sashin?

[17:57]

We can lay it on to various reasons. We can say, well, it's because we have pain in our legs, or because our mind is restless, or we have other things to do, or, you know, we can say various things about it. But actually, I think fundamentally, it's just hard to come to ourself. hard to just enjoy ourself as we are, moment to moment. When we can enjoy ourself, that's another aspect of samadhi.

[18:59]

Jiyu Jiyu Samadhi. Samadhi of just our self-enjoyment of our nature, Buddha nature, universal nature, which we all share. And there's another aspect, which is called light. Sometimes it's called komyo, which means light. Light, which is fundamental light.

[20:13]

Someone once translated it as a divine light. Divine has some connotations which may be A little strange, but it has that feeling. Light which is not moving, but just there. Not something dynamic, but at the same time, not going anywhere. Just there, already. So that is another aspect of samadhi. Samadhi has many aspects, and we call it different things when we look at it in different ways.

[21:22]

So sometimes we call it samadhi of one act, and sometimes we call it samadhi of light, and sometimes we call it samadhi of no contention. No conflict. This is when, no matter what happens, we can sit very well and easily and comfortably. No matter what's going on, there's no conflict. So all these names are really names of one thing, but When we talk about it, we can use these terms, and each one is very expressive, and you can identify with each one of these terms according to your experience.

[22:26]

So right now, I'm talking about samadhi, one act. One action. Just to follow through one action means that when you're moving, you're also composed. Sounds simple, but composed in the sense of you're right where you are within each movement. So if everybody's sitting zazen and you come in the door, How do you move across the floor to get to your seat?

[23:35]

It's very simple. How do you move across the floor to get to your seat? When everybody else is sitting zazen and you come in and say, sometime during zazen, you may feel, I have to get to my seat quickly so that I won't disturb anybody. So if you, and then you scoot across the floor, and everybody hears you scooting across the floor. So as soon as you do that, you've lost your composure. You've lost your sense of I am here, because you want to get over to there without moving across the floor. If you could fly, you would, but you can't. You fly, you know, you pretend that you're blind.

[24:35]

So when you open the door and walk into Zen Dojo when everybody else is sitting, just one step at a time, you're within each step. And when you are there, within each step, calmly walking across the floor, nobody cares. You're one with everyone. When you have your own composure, everyone else relaxes. Everyone else is included in that. But when you don't have it, then no matter what you do, you disturb everybody. And it's the same when we're serving. We want to get to, the server wants to come and get to where they're going to serve the people and then go on to each person.

[25:44]

That's our movement, our goal, our destination. But within that destination, each step is right here. So it's not a matter of moving slowly or fast. Fast and slow is no different than good or bad. It doesn't depend on good or bad or fast or slow. It depends on being within each step, being right there. This is my life right now. It's just a matter of not missing our life, not passing ourselves up. So the hardest thing, really, is to be right within time, completely in time. One of the koans that Suzuki Roshi gave me was, don't be behind or ahead, don't be ahead or behind.

[26:55]

And that's a koan I still work with forever. And we all get ahead and behind. But we always, our practice is to wake up to the present. Our practice is keep waking up to reality. And We don't criticize each other for our mistakes, but we need to be criticized if we don't wake up to reality from time to time. If we don't wake up to reality from time to time, somebody has to hit us or do something, remind us to wake up. So we're constantly waking up and going back to sleep. Waking up and falling off, waking up and falling off. And Zazen is waking up.

[28:03]

So we do it when we sit. We're constantly doing it. We're constantly falling out. And then, oh yes, and you wake up for a moment. You stop all that stuff and just be here. Just wake up to right here. So that's our life. And our practice is to keep waking up. You may think, well, I'm not awake. So what's the use? People do feel that way. What's the use? I can never do this. I don't know anyone who's awake all the time. All of us fall off and come back. Fall off and come back. That's our life. That's our practice. Keep waking up. And even if we can just wake up a few moments at a time, it's worth it. It's worth the effort.

[29:07]

Even if we can only be awake a little bit at a time. So the effort to continually wake up is our enlightened mind. We think that if we're enlightened, we'll always be awake. I don't say that that's not true, but the effort to stay awake is enlightenment itself. So that's why practice is enlightenment. It's already there. It's not something that we induce. Our effort wakes it up, awakens us.

[30:09]

Our effort awakens us. So constantly keep making effort. And the people that we appreciate are not the smarties, but the people who have the effort, whose effort encourages everybody. Because, fortunately, enlightenment doesn't depend on whether you're brilliant or stupid. It just depends on your effort to stay awake. So during this Sashin, our concentration, our concentrated effort, I hope, will be just staying awake.

[31:51]

This one act, Samadhi, there is no such thing as time out during Sashin. Whatever we do is included. So zazen is zazen, sitting is zazen, eating is zazen, qin hin is zazen, the break is zazen, going to the bathroom is zazen, changing your clothes is zazen, sitting down and standing up is zazen. So let's practice being where we are, even when we're going. No matter what our intentions or our destination is, be concentrated on being where we are, moment by moment.

[32:57]

How we put our foot down when we're walking, Concentrating on our footsteps is really a good way to practice concentration. Is your foot falling lightly or heavily? In the Zendo, be careful not to walk on your heels. Walk on the flat of your foot. ball of your foot down first, just slightly, so that you don't fall on it with your heel. Normal way of walking is on our heels, but in Zendo, it's more careful. And keep that concentrated mind continuously for three days. Don't lose it, even if you have to talk to somebody.

[34:07]

If you have to talk to somebody, then you should still keep that concentration, even though you're doing that. It's easier, easy to forget, you know. That's why just practicing silently helps us to do that. But we have to do it all the time. in our daily life, when we're talking and moving around and driving our car and listening to the radio and reading the news, dealing with our anger and frustration, we still have to be there, practice that. Let's not limit our self to some idea of proper activity. In this Sashin, we do limit our self. Sashin means limiting our self and embracing totally our complete mind through that limitation.

[35:16]

But if something foreign comes in, we should be able to accept it. If some foreign element comes passing through, we should be able to accept it, not complain, not worry. Just settle on ourselves. Bye.

[35:59]

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