Well, I don't know what I was going to say at that point, but I'll say something else. Or maybe it's the same thing. Maybe I should turn the knife upside down. At that moment, I would say that I received transmitted mind. That moment was something that I'd been seeing in Suzuki Roshi and at that moment I felt it. And if this doesn't make sense to you, then original mind doesn't make any sense. Because original mind only makes sense if you can imagine a mind free of culture, parents and so forth.

[01:12]

And although you can conceive of it as a possibility, it's much more likely if you know someone who has this mind. And so it wasn't just any moment of mind that occurred, it was my first moment of Suzuki Roshi's mind or lineage mind. So I couldn't have had faith, like, you know, In any kind of moment of clarity. As I understand this, this was a very particular moment of clarity related to the fact that I was practicing with Ezekiel. I remember when I went to the Zendo later that day or the next morning Suki Roshi could tell pretty much what had happened but still to do that I had to have an intent

[02:21]

to continue this unrelievedly for quite a while. And I didn't divert this intent in any way for at least five years. I would also say using this word intent is that when I had this moment of feeling good and clear and bright, the ability of my to say, yes, if I can feel this, I can feel this all the time. I'll just switch it around so I have one of these moments a year. I mean, in reverse, one length of time that time when I feel horrible.

[03:49]

And my ability to have that conviction was because I could bring intent to that moment. And that intent was from muddling around, trying to bring attention, having intention, practicing. And suddenly at that moment it was intent. It wasn't attention or intention. Yes. Maybe that was a little too personal a story as an example. But it occurred to me yesterday or last night or this morning or sometime. I don't know why this... Gratzgang, etc.

[04:56]

Draw these things out of me. I don't know why these bands from Graz pull these things out of me. The Gratzgangs. They're a dangerous bunch. These bands from Graz are a pretty dangerous bunch. They're ill and... And you guys from Vienna and Hamburg better be careful, they're recruiting. I've even heard you're welcome to come next year if you want to. Even if you don't translate. Even if I would come, if you would be four?

[05:59]

Oh, four, oh my God. Only if the new one's in therapy. We're only preparing him or her for therapy. So this developing of this working with attention and intention is a kind of alchemy of developing intent. unambivalent intention. You can't force this on you. You really have to come about it because you can't deny ambivalence. It's not something you can force.

[07:01]

It's something you generate. And that basically is the root of the Bodhisattva vow. Since Christina asked me how you get to be a bodhisattva quick, she doesn't want to pass through the disciple stage. Work on the pure alchemical gold of intent. I work on pure alchemical gold by Wille. Now, you know, I also thought about ways in which Buddhism, the Buddhist culture which uses these ten realms, would understand alchemy, I mean, would understand like a hungry...

[08:21]

would understand people in those terms. Like you might understand two people getting married because they're both hungry ghosts. Can they feed on each other's energy? But there's not enough for both, so they arrange for one of them to have an affair to feed on the energy of that person. And then one of your parents passes that hungry ghost to you, and then you, eating your energy up while you're trying to, you know, etc., There's a whole system for understanding these things energetically like this, which probably parallels psychology in a lot of ways. And one of the things that this sense of the purification process of big mind is this movement, this directionality and locality is basically energy.

[09:43]

And the process of purifying your mind lets energy into your... merges energy and mind. And that's another way to talk about intent. And when you have more experience of enfolding waking mind and dreaming mind, and small mind and big mind, you also begin to infuse your mind and your activity with energy. And it does take a certain kind of energy and strength to maintain a grounding in what's ascertainable or faith.

[11:08]

Now this may sound kind of complicated or something, I don't know how it sounds. But if we look at what is a family, a family is a commonplace and yet very sensitive art form, we might say. And how two people stay together in a way that's really nourishing to both. and create a nourishing situation for children and friends. There are probably, if you really looked at it carefully, lots of subtle rules that are kind of like most people don't follow, but they're kind of obvious, etc.

[12:32]

And how do you really keep your marriage vows? And how does the infant child understand the predictability of the parent's intent to be there for it? Does the parent only convey intention to the child, or does the parent convey intent? And do the parents bring their best minds to each other and then their best minds to the child? Or their best minds for work? And if we understand If we decided to look at a family that way, it's not very different from looking at the Buddhist family or Sangha.

[13:47]

How do teacher and practitioner, disciple and Sangha family bring their vision of what a human being is together? How is that developed together? And allow a real release and fullness of energy. And create a situation where the whole of your life can be brought to the situation. Anyway, I'm just trying to... to give a feeling for this practice, not as something foreign, but as something that Buddhism tries to make explicit enough so that we can develop these units, Sangha units, in society.

[14:56]

The basic conception of Buddhism, except for Tibetan Buddhism, society is healthy if it has a lot of these sort of Sangha units in it. They don't have to be Buddhist Sangha, but you understand what I mean. I mean Tibet's different because it tried to make the whole society the Sangha, which is more problematical. But you see, I mean, I think in Vienna at the period of Wittgenstein, for example, And Jugendstil and all that.

[16:04]

It was probably a very few people, I don't know, 50 or something, that gave a real... feeling for the whole city. And that's not a Sangha, but Buddhism would look at that as a kind of Sangha-type unit. So we have the Graz gang, you know. I mean, I don't want to burden you with too much, but... But any two or three people, you know, or five or six, who have some feeling together is... the nucleus of society, I think. And the more of those there are, the healthier the whole society. Because we locate ourselves through each other.

[17:05]

So we want to create a world where individuals can fully locate themselves. My own feeling is that's the main obligation of each of us. Create a world just for their neighbors that any person can fully locate themselves in. So that if they ask themselves, what do I really want to do or what do I really want to be, the conditions are there that the intent can be there to realize that. Let's call that a natural ending point. Shall we sit for a few moments?

[18:26]

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