Something To Die For: That's What Makes People Believe In Something

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Good morning. Well, in our practice period class, we've been studying Master Dogen's Tenzo Kyokun, Dogen's admonitions for the head cook in the monastery. the Tenzo, who is the manager of the kitchen. The kitchen, of course, where many people work, is a microcosm of the world. Just like the Zendo here is a microcosm of the world. And any organized activity that we do is also a microcosm of the world.

[01:05]

So how we operate in the world, in the kitchen, applies to how we operate in the world. All the elements are there. Just like all the elements of the universe are right here. Each one of us is a microcosm of the universe. So if you want to study the universe, study the self. Someone said, it's not necessary to peep at the sky with a little tube. It's okay. But if you really want to understand yourself or the universe, study the self. And then peep at the universe.

[02:09]

When we can let go of our self-centeredness, then we can look at peep at the universe and see where the center is, the true center. the true center of the whole universe is right here. That's my opinion. So Dogen's Tensokyokun, he gives all these suggestions about how to order your space and how to create an environment a harmonious environment with people carrying big pots of soup and knives and dangerous implements, and how you realize how you're working together with many people in a small space and making some effort to use the time and not be used by the time.

[03:22]

So the Tenzo Kiyokun is one fascicle of Dogen's Eihei Shingi. And the Shingi is a collection of Dogen's admonitions for all the officers in the monastery. The director, aside from the tenzo, the director, the work leader, the head of the various departments, heads of various departments. talks about various teachers who have been the heads of these departments and their virtuous practice.

[04:28]

And so he gives examples. And so I'm going to give you some stories of these virtuous teachers and their practice. as examples of how to practice. The head gardener is one. That's a great story. But there's, you know, in the olden days, Back in China, the monasteries had mills. The mill was set a little bit outside of the compound. And because the mill was a little bit isolated, the person who was running the mill was hopefully an advanced student.

[05:49]

someone who had some degree of enlightenment. So, this story is about the head of the mill. The Zen master Fa Yuan of Mount Wuzhou in Qi province studied with priest Haishu Dan. Shudan was the abbot on Mount Hakun. He inquired about the great matter and deeply penetrated bone and marrow. Bone and marrow, that's the essence of Zen. It's in your bones and marrow. So Shudan appointed him to be the chief miller. Every year, Fa Yuan collected money by selling rice and wheat bran and earned interest by lending the money."

[06:59]

Wow. That's questionable, but I mean, you can raise questions about that. But you have to realize, in India, the monks supported themselves simply by begging. But when in China, although they did do that, it wasn't really enough to support a monastery. They didn't collect enough to support a monastery, so they had different. Also, you know, the weather in China is very different than in India. And when the weather is different, the practice is different. So they had to support the monastery, and so this is one way that they did that. So, Xu Dan appointed him to be the chief miller. Every year, Fa Yuan collected money by selling rice and wheat bran and earned interest by lending the money. He hired workers with this money to do temple improvements and put the rest in the temple treasury.

[08:02]

But one day, someone made an accusation about him to Xu Dan. Every day, Fa Yuan drinks wine. eats meat, and entertains farmers' wives and young women at the mill. So the entire temple was stirred up, hearing as Fa Yuan purposely bought meat and wine and hung them on the wall of the mill. He bought cosmetic powder and gave them to the farmers' wives and young women, and asked them to paint their faces When the monks came to the mill, Fa Yuan took the young women's hands, teasing them and laughing without any sign of shyness. Xu Dan one day called him to the abbot's room and asked him why he was doing it. Fa Yuan said nothing but, yes, yes.

[09:04]

Xu Dan slapped his face, but Fa Yuan did not flinch. He bowed and started to leave. Xu Dan yelled at him and said, get out, quick. Fa Yuan said, I need to settle my account and find someone to take over my position. Later, Fa Yuan told Xu Dan, I paid for the wine and meat that is hanging in the mill. and put 300 plus 1,000 sin, that's money, in the temple joinery. Xu Dan was greatly surprised and realized that the accusations came from the jealousy of petty minds. So there was no excuses. He didn't make any. He didn't say, no, I didn't do it or make any excuses. He just went along with the story and let the Dharma Take care of it.

[10:07]

This is great trust in Dharma. Well, at Shudan's community, Zen Master Yuan Tong Fa Zhu was Shuso. He accepted an offer to be abbot of Mount Simeon, so he asked Fa Yuan to be the Shuso at his new place. So the mill or milling cottage takes care of pounding rice and grinding flour. It is located five or six Cho from the temple building. The miller takes care of it by himself. This was Fa Yuan's position. In the past, people with the way mind, way-seeking mind, filled this position. And also, those who are unsuited filled this position. But nowadays, it is hard to find those who have the way mind. So for the time being, people who have some capacity are used. Sometimes there are such people and sometimes there is not. The world is becoming more crude and coarse.

[11:10]

What a pity. So this is hundreds of years ago. Babylonic cuneiform, that's language, stone, was discovered from thousands of years ago and said, the young people of today. So nothing's really changed. fundamentally, some old philosopher said, peace is just an interval between a continuous war, which is really so. Just a blip. So, When we observe old Buddha Faiyuan's practice, there's nothing that can compare with it, either in the past or the present.

[12:16]

It is like the colors of peach and plum, the purity of pine and cypress. Winter wind does not break it. Frost and snow does not impinge on it. We can see how diligent his study of the way was. We can see how lofty his sincerity was. Those who come later should not give up their determination for the practice of the way, should not back off, even if faced with this kind of misfortune. Hua Yuan's practice was extraordinary. You should take a look at this and try to make an effort in this direction. The depths of the old way-minded teachers can be realized through this kind of determination. The more we observe, the higher and more solid we know it is, and this is what we should yearn for. This kind of practice is genuine and sincere, and our practice is always tested. When you can face this kind of difficulty,

[13:21]

and continue, it increases your sincerity and determination, and brings out your spirit, your great spirit to do that. That's what our practice is all about, basically. There's another story which I am going to present, which makes this one look like nothing. People have a lot of trouble with this story. Some people, not everyone, but this gives rise to a lot of people's emotions. This is an example. Now, wait a minute.

[14:22]

Okay. Priest Shazian was a stern, cool, and aloof old teacher. There's this guy who has a small zendo, but he's very highly respected. But he was very stern, cool, and aloof. But he was highly respected by the monks. A group of monks, including Zen Master Fa Yuan of Mount Fu in Shu province, and Zen Master Zi Huai of Mount Tianye in Yue province, came to practice in his community.

[15:24]

So, they were both Zen masters, but they were Zen masters later in their life. They were students at this time. It was a cold and snowy day. When they met Master Xie Ziyuan, he yelled and drove them away. It was not only that, he poured water, now this is the middle of the winter, he poured water around the visiting monks hall so that everybody's clothes got wet. All the visiting monks fled except Fa Yuan and Zi Huai, these two Dharma brothers. Fa Yuan and Zi Huai arranged their robes and set Tangario in the hall. Tangario is a period. It can be three days or five days or seven days, depending on the leadership. And you just sit there.

[16:26]

You sit all day. You go to the bathroom. They bring you some food. There's no kinhead. You just sit. We have, in Tassajara, we have five days of tangaryo, which is the entrance exam to the monastery. The entrance exam is you just sit there all day, day after day. You go to the bathroom, everybody else comes in the zendo. Well, it depends on where the, Tangario is. Sometimes it's just off by itself, but of course, Tassajara is in the zendo. So people come in, the monks come in and sit, and everybody's sitting together, and then they have service in the morning, everybody does service. Then they have breakfast, everybody has breakfast, and then everybody else leaves, except the Tangario students stay.

[17:30]

So they just stay there. Five days, everybody's gone to Tassajara, has done this, believe it or not. Then there's no way to prepare for it. It's just like people come to Sashin here for the first time. They say, how can I prepare myself for Sashin? And I say, don't prepare anything. Just step into it without any idea about what it is. and just stay there moment by moment. You're living your life one moment at a time, which is how you should be doing it. We should always live our life one moment at a time, thoroughly. So, when they met Matsu, he did all this stuff. And so, Fa Yuan and Zi Wai arranged their robes and sat Tagario in the hall. Shazian came in and in a scolding voice said, if you two monks don't leave, I'll hit you.

[18:38]

Faiyuan approached the master and said, the two of us came hundreds of miles to study your Zen. How could a dipper full of water drive us away? Even if we get beaten to death, we will not leave. You laugh, but that's the essence of Zen. If you're going to study Zen, you have to have that attitude. You can study it even if you don't have that attitude. But if you want to find the essence, you have to have that attitude. I don't care if I die. Even if we get beaten to death, we'll not leave." So Shazian laughed and said, you both need to study Zen.

[19:40]

Go hang up your bags. So later, he asked Fa Yuan to serve as the tenzo. At that time, the assembly was suffering his aloof style and unappetizing food. One day, Shazian went out to the nearby village. And while he was away, Hua Yuan took the key to the storehouse, without permission, and took some noodles and some oil, and made a delicious breakfast for the students, for the community. Xue Zhiyuan returned and sat outside the zhendou. I'm sorry, Xue Zhiyuan returned early, and without saying anything, joined in the zhendou meal. He just sat down, didn't say anything, ate the meal, After breakfast was over, he sat outside the zendo and sent for the tenzo. Shizyon said, did you really take noodles and oil from the storeroom and cook that meal for the community?

[20:45]

You're doing something wonderful, right? But it's also transgression. Then Faiwan said, yes, I did. Please punish me. Shazian told him to estimate the price of the material and compensate the community by selling his robes and bowl. Then he gave him 30 blows and kicked him out of the monastery. Faiyuan stayed in a nearby city. At the temple, they had a small temple shelter outside in town. for guests, and asked his dharma brother to plead with the master to pardon him, but Shazian would not forgive him. Faiwan also pleaded, even if I'm not admitted to return, I would like to request to be in line to enter the Abbott's room, like for dokasan or for lecture.

[21:53]

But Shazian did not approve it. One day, Shazian went to the city and saw Fa Yuan standing in front of a traveler's shelter. Shazian said to him, this shelter belongs to the monastery. How long have you been living here? Have you paid your fee? Fees? He asked Fa Yuan to calculate his fees and asked him to pay. Fa Yuan was not disturbed. He carried his bowl in the city, collecting food, which he sold and then made his payment to the monastery. Later, Shazian went to the city and saw Fa Yuan begging. He returned to the monastery and told the assembly that Fa Yuan had a true intention to study Zen and finally called him back. In particular, the heart of the Tenzo Fa Yuan needs to be studied.

[22:58]

This should be considered as something encouraged, something encouraged, I'm sorry, something encountered once in a thousand years. You don't hear this very often. I agree. Neither the wise nor the unsuited can come up to him. Nobody can come up to him. However, if those who are Tenzo now do not have the aspiration of Fa Yuan, how can they arrive at the inner chamber of Buddha ancestors? The Tenzo's mentioned above are all dragons and elephants. of the Buddha ocean, extraordinary people in the ancestral realm. When we look for such people nowadays, it is not possible to find them anywhere. This is Dogen's rant, but some people really don't like this story. They think it's too hard. And yes, it is too hard. his teachers being really too hard on him.

[24:04]

But he's so grateful. And you may say, well, that's just perversion. He likes punishment. No, doesn't like punishment. You can't even, we can psychologize his mind. You know, we can do that. But actually, it's beyond that. I think that the students who stayed with Suzuki Roshi and You know, when we were having, when I was first practicing Zen back in the 60s, nobody could, nobody was very good at it.

[25:17]

And so there was a room full of people with their silent dramas going on during Sashin and Zazen. You don't have to have all this particular set of circumstances. Everyone has their own set of circumstances. But everyone was making this great effort, we're all making this great effort to stay in our position. had the feeling that nothing could overturn us. This was Suzuki Roshi's teaching, don't let anything, don't become a victim of yourself. Nothing can overturn you, no matter how difficult

[26:24]

Whatever difficulties you face, you don't let it overturn you. It just brings out your Zen spirit. Then wisdom comes forth because there's no hindrance. Now people do this kind of thing either You know, all those people that walk up Mount Everest have something like this in mind. So practicing with the trials, everyone is given a set of trials in their life. And to be able to accept the trials, that like Fa Yuan is accepting the trial that he's put himself in the position to deal with, and the teacher is exercising the same responsibility.

[27:49]

The teacher has his responsibility according to who he is. And so Iowan is accepting the responsibility according to who he is. He doesn't hate the teacher. There's no resentment. He doesn't feel as if he's being put upon. He said, this is simply my karma. which I totally accept because of what I feel I have to do. And the teacher, the same thing. Yes, the teacher saw the potential. That's why he was a good teacher. He saw the potential in Fa Yuan. And he was not, he was not really angry at Fa Yuan.

[28:56]

He was very strict. Sometimes people that are, you know, like you hear the stories of the piano teacher. And the student makes a mistake and the piano teacher has a wand that goes on his knuckles, right? I don't think it's the same thing. But if you, this is a very extreme, very extreme situation. You don't need this extremist situation to practice, I'm sorry. I don't want to discourage you because of this story, but it's an extreme example. All examples are not this extreme, but if you really look at it, there is something like that.

[30:02]

You know, it's like, I invented this little story about, we go to a party, and we're sitting in our chairs, and then the party, the leader of the party comes around and gives everyone a little package. little present. And we open our present, and there's a little fortune cookie in it. You open the cookie, and it says, you're born in this situation, and these are the circumstances of this situation, and deal with it. How will you deal with it? You can change, but it doesn't change the essence of the circumstances. We keep changing partners, but you wind up with the same problems because of you.

[31:08]

So how do you deal with the situation that you're handed without trying to escape? Because even though you think you're escaping, you're just creating more problems. I remember Suzuki Boshi saying, the problems you have now are good problems. You may want to change and solve your problem, but Be careful because after you do that, the next problem you will receive, you'll wish you had the problem you had. Yes. Yes, he said that right. He also said, you're given just the right amount of problems for you.

[32:14]

Yes. Yes. I think you read the story correctly. Yes, how will you deal with the practice, with the problem that's handed to you? So that's our practice. How do you deal with whatever is handed to you? How do you deal with whatever situation you encounter? Well, you know, Sangha, we have the Buddha, the Dharma, and the Sangha.

[33:31]

The Buddha is our essence. Each one of us is a manifestation of Buddha. So we have, the innate wisdom to deal with whatever comes along. And that's what brings out our Buddha nature. The Dharma is our wisdom. The Dharma is our The Dharma is our Sambhogakaya, our wisdom body. And Sangha is, there's the narrow Sangha, which is the people that we associate with.

[34:42]

Then there's the wider Sangha, which includes everybody and everything. So our practice our wisdom body allows us to realize that our practice is not for ourself. We do not practice for ourselves. People do that. And when we start to practice, we're self-involved. You know, we really are. Who's the best person in the world? Well, of course, it's me. So we're totally self-involved. But as practice with others develops, we realize we're not just practicing for ourselves. We're practicing for the whole world, everyone around us, and with everyone around us. So that helps us to let go of our ego.

[35:46]

If we're only practicing for ourself, by ourself, you have to be a very advanced person to do that. Otherwise, you're simply creating more ego, more self-centeredness. So the purpose of practicing with Sangha is to be supported by everyone, because this is a difficult practice. Life itself is a difficult practice. So we practice with like-minded people, which encourages our practice, and we encourage others. The reason I come every day for Zazen is not for myself, fortunately, but just to show up for everybody. I don't say that I help them. It's hard to help people. But I simply show up for everybody to encourage everybody to practice. That's the only reason I do that.

[36:51]

It's not the only reason, but it's my main reason for coming. When I'm by myself, I don't sit satsang. When you're on vacation, do you sit satsang? No, I just take a vacation. Sometimes I'll sit, yeah. But I just, I'm sitting all the time, even if, you know, my legs are not crossed. I'm sitting zazen when I go to the grocery store and when I'm driving my car, when I'm talking to people. So when I'm doing dokesan, people say, how come, you know, you never get a chance to sit in the zendo because you're always doing dokesan. But I'm doing dokesan, I'm sitting zazen when I'm doing dokesan, when I'm interacting with people. When I'm cooking in the zendo, I'm doing zazen. And so you share your enlightenment with everybody. Otherwise, what am I if I'm just doing this for myself?

[37:53]

Just more selfish activity. It's not about doing something for yourself. When you do something for others, you're doing something for yourself. Of course, you're doing something for yourself. But the more you do something for others, the more you do something for yourself. So because the more you forget yourself, the more you're doing something for yourself. But yourself is not just this single person. You realize that everyone is part of yourself. Everything you're doing is an activity that includes yourself and others. So sangha is the most important part, because the most important thing is to let go of your ego. Sakyong has no, shows, is exemplary for letting go of his ego.

[38:59]

There's no ego there. He just says, tell me, I did this, I didn't do a wonderful thing. I just did this because I saw that everybody would enjoy it, right? Gave them a great meal and we all enjoyed it. And I'm willing to take the consequences. If you're willing to take the consequences, you can do a lot of things. But you have to be careful because you will receive consequences for whatever you do. Everything is consequential, sequential, consequential. So just be careful what you do. So we have great respect for karma because when you do this, you'll get that. So anyway. Don't you feel good, you know, coming and enjoying the sangha?

[40:09]

Yeah, even though, you know, people you don't like and people, you know. I don't practice with people I like or don't like. I just practice with people, whatever it is. So, you know, picking out favorite people and people you like, you know, I just practice with everybody the way they are. That's it. And I enjoy it. You know, I enjoy practicing with people I don't like, or people I don't have an affinity with, or whatever. But that's the best practice, actually. I don't say best, but, you know, challenging. So challenging is really good. Meeting challenges is really good. not running away from challenges, although sometimes we have to do that. Nothing's fixed. Everything we say has another side, right? But still, if you want to have a better world, you have to go out and do something.

[41:21]

Right? And you can't make a better world by secluding yourself. Even though there will not be a better world, we have to pretend that there is, that there can be. So even though it's, you know, Hakuin, at the end of his commentary on the Hōkyō Samurai, said, foolish wise men filling the well with snow. Foolish wise men, I like that one. Foolish wise men and women. Filling the well with, just doing work because you believe in what you're doing, but even though you know there's no result. The result will not be what you, but on the other hand, it's fulfilling. So fulfilling, fulfillment doesn't mean that the result of what you do will be perfect.

[42:27]

Fulfilling means just doing the work because that's what's fulfilling. You work for peace. There'll never be peace, lasting peace, but there'll be lasting peace in you. The world will always be war, but there'll be lasting peace in you if you understand what peace really is. Phayawan found his peace within his difficulty. Peace, you can only find peace within your difficulty. You can't find peace without difficulty. Because peace is the opposite of difficulty. Right? Peace is the opposite of war. But there'll always be war. So how do you find peace within the war? That's called enlightening activity.

[43:29]

So you light up your own portion of the world. and find the peace within yourself by realizing that there will never be lasting peace. That's the only way you will find peace. Because you're reconciling the opposites. Without reconciling opposites, there's no peace. There are a lot of good stories in here, but this is a very extreme one. And extreme stories are good, because they challenge our peaceful mind. So I'm happy to ask, you know, it's late, but if you have a question,

[44:43]

Okay. Okay. Okay. Oh, yes. But he was just somebody else in the world. He was actually isolated from his Sangha.

[45:49]

That's, yeah, he was isolated, that was his punishment, to be isolated from the Sangha. Yes, people supported, yes. Yeah, yes, but at the same time, His position was taken away and he was not allowed to associate with the Sangha. That was his big deprivation. Yes. The essence of practice is to create harmony in the Sangha.

[46:55]

That's the purpose of practice, in that sense, is to find harmony within the Sangha. In order to find harmony in the Sangha, you have to find harmony within yourself. So, and without having the Sangha, there's no way to express it. To bring out the vital spirit of the students Yeah, and by depriving them. That's just his way, austerity.

[47:59]

Yes, not too much food, not such good food, you know. This is Buddhist practice. It's just basic Buddhist practice, but with an iron hand. But he also was compassionate. This is his great compassion. We tend to think of compassion as being nice. No, that's not compassion. That's the kind of compassion. True compassion is being strict. Sometimes, he also gave him 30 blows. That was compassion too, but you don't think of it that way. Sometimes, you know, everything has its opposite. And sometimes when you do something the opposite of what you think it should be, it's actually compassionate for this side. Anyway, life's tough.

[49:04]

But it's also sweet.

[49:07]

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