It is hard to know whether we have doshin or not. Doshin is the way mind, or holy mind. If you translate it into English, the way-seeking mind, it's not the way-seeking mind, it's not the kind of mind which exists inside or outside, or in heaven, etc.

[01:08]

Just like avocado seed, you can grasp or you cannot notice. It is not the way mind, doshin. It is not the way-seeking mind, it is nothing but the practice itself, practices, that which you have to do, anyway. When you are exactly in the midst of the practicing, practice, at that time, it is called doshin,

[02:12]

the way mind. For instance, I told you before, when you put a certain label on you, so-called good driver, but actually good driver is not something like avocado seed you can always hold on. In your hand, there is no particular patterns which is called good driver, because that is, good driver is in the practice itself, it doesn't exist inside or outside or whatever it is. Only you can drive in safety from moment to moment, we call temporarily good driver,

[03:12]

good driver. The same applies to doshin, the way-seeking mind. Usually you want to practice Buddhism according to your feeling, your feeling. Well, this is prepared, but in a sense, if you practice or if you take care of your life according to your feeling, it is very difficult to know the depth of human life, and it is very difficult to continue to practice, it is very difficult to continue to take care of your life under all circumstances. So what is life? Life is completely something you have to take care, beyond your feeling good or bad, right or wrong, anyway. Under all circumstances, you do your best to take care.

[04:16]

So that is Buddhism. If you feel good, and then another time you say, I can get the way-seeking mind, or maybe so, but that's the way-seeking mind fabricated by your feeling, is very flexible, no, very fragile. Fragile? Very fragile, very flaccid. You can't, well, that is not doshin, the way-seeking mind, anyway. That's why sitting is very good, you sit today, all day. If you see you are the thing, according to your feeling, what do you feel as the thing?

[05:20]

How is, how you are the thing is going on. Very wobbly, wobbly, okay. When you feel bored, you cannot continue to practice zazen. Only you can feel good, you can continue to practice. But if you don't feel good, you don't want. But, if you take care of your life like this, you don't have any chance to know the depth of human life. That's why zazen is, or Buddhism is, anyway, continue to practice, okay. Regardless of how you feel it, or not, completely beyond your feeling, of course, if you practice very naturally, you feel something.

[06:22]

But that is a part of your experience. So, that is our practice. Just like a drive for a car on the freeway. Even though you say, I am a good driver, next moment, someone hits you, that time still you say, I am a good driver. This is a practice in Buddhism, okay. So, that way, the way mind, the body mind, so we should practice the universal path with the mind and body. Mind and body are nothing but, I told you, anyway, complete serenity and tranquility.

[07:24]

Serenity, tranquility. No sound you want to hear, no one you want to talk. If you have even slightly something you can talk, it is now real practice. So, even though you feel something and by your feeling, if you can find some aspirations, okay, well, if you can get a certain aspiration by your feeling, it is now real practice. Because you can talk with this feeling. So, real practice is continually going at the level of no sound. You can hear, no one you want to talk. This is the philosophical we call emptiness.

[08:26]

But this tranquility is not something separate from human life. It is something manifested every inch of your life. It should be there. The show, bow, walking, washing your face, always there is a chak, tranquility, serenity there. At that time, you can really practice Buddhism. In Genjo-koin, Dogen then says, when you obtain one Dharma, you practice it. When you encounter with one practice, you should practice it. So, that is from moment to moment, anyway you drive in safety.

[09:35]

That is called, anyway, good driving. If you practice Zazen from moment to moment with your whole-heartedness, it is called the way-mind, Doshi. That time, it really works your life. Zazen, show, washing your face, anyway it works. Otherwise, it is very difficult to continue to practice Zazen, Buddhist life, Buddhist practice. Nirvana, in Sanskrit, sometimes translated as Jaku-mitsu. Jaku-mitsu means, sometimes in English, we say extinction, extinction. In Japanese, we say Jaku-mitsu.

[10:38]

Jaku is exactly the same letter as Jaku, Jaku of Jaku-jo. That is, Jaku is a nun with whom you want to talk. Nothing. When you see, when you meet one Dharma, all you have to do is to practice it. Means, be one. Not with whom you want to talk. This is object, or this is subject, there is nothing. So, all you have to do is, when you meet one Dharma, you have to practice it completely. Day by day, from moment to moment. At that time, it is called, anyway, Jaku.

[11:43]

Then, Mitsu is extinction. Mitsu is extinction. So, Jaku is simultaneously extinction, means, very naturally, all delusions drop off. Drop off. Your cause, your body, other cause, all become one. Support your life. So, all delusions, anxieties, in a minute, no one knows what will happen. So, lots of anxiety, if you see, if you see driving, objectively, lots of fears come up. If you see the future, fear comes from the future. Because in a moment, no one knows what will happen. But at that time, it is very difficult to drive exactly with serenity, so called Jaku.

[12:48]

So, anxiety really prevents you from driving in safety. So, all you have to do is, anyway, you have to drive with serenity, Jaku. None to talk. Anyway, nothing. At that time, it is simultaneously Mitsu, extinction means, no delusions. Completely no delusions. Well, no delusion is not that you try to be away from delusions. No way. If you do this, all the delusions come out. So, how can you be away from delusions? That is, when you meet one object, one Dharma, you have to, anyway, practice it. With Jaku, serenity. At that time, delusions drops off.

[13:52]

To start with, by itself, by themselves. That is spoken, then it says, in Fukanza Zen, in Zazen. If you really do Zazen, delusions drop off. That is called Shinjin. That's like dropping off body and mind. So, you must try to drop off. You cannot drop off. How can you drop off? When you do Zazen, at that time, very naturally, all delusions, first of all, drops off by themselves. That is, typically speaking, it is called Samadhi. Samadhi. So, Dogen then says in Bendowa, Praying in Samadhi.

[14:54]

Praying fully in Samadhi. Praying means not to pray. You cannot pray with Samadhi. Samadhi prays in Samadhi. That time it is called Samadhi. Concentration prays in Concentration. That time, Concentration really works. No gap between you and Concentration Samadhi. Flame of Concentration drops off. Flame, naturally. Idea of Concentration drops off. That is called to pray. To pray in Samadhi fully. In Japanese, we say, Nari-kyo. This is very interesting term.

[15:57]

Nari-kyo is a little bit practical aspect, expression of Samadhi. Nari means to become. To become. Kyo means totally. In a sense, totally or wholeheartedly. But literally, it means to cut off. To cut off. So, Nari is to become. To become. To become means oneness. To become, you must become you as you are. When you do the Zen, right in the midst of the Zen, you must be you. Means there is no gap between you and the Zen. At that time, this becoming. Becoming, total becoming is simultaneously cut off. It is exactly same meaning. To become is to cut off.

[17:00]

Delusion, you can cut off. Not you. Becoming cuts off. And delusion. In other words, Dogen then says, Delusion drops off. Drops off. Not you drops off. Not you cut off. If you try to cut off, immediately something happens. You never cut. So, this is the Buddhist practice. In general Buddhism, one of the four limitless mind. One of the four limitless, unlimitless, limitless. Limitless, the mind, you know pretty well. It is what you call upaksha.

[18:02]

Upaksha sometimes translated as impartiality or equality. Equality, sometimes equanimity. Equality, equanimity. Literally, but upaksha means abandonment. Abandonment, okay? Abandonment. Anyway, to throw away. How can you throw away? How can you throw away your mind, your thoughts in the Zen? Can you throw away? No way. Well, in Zen Buddhism we say, no mind. No thinking. So, usually people believe Zen is to practice no mind, no thinking. So, in Zen you try to not think. But not think is already to think. So, you cannot stop it.

[19:07]

How can you, how can you cut off? How can you abandon? Abandon your thoughts. You must be, anyway, equanimity. Equanimity means you practice, you become yourself in serenity, perfectly. You practice Zazen with serenity and with, what to say, equanimity. Nothing to talk, nothing to comment, nothing to discuss with your feelings. Feelings always appears and disappears, appears, disappears. From moment to moment, anyway, you just focus on Zazen itself. How? With the body. Anyway, first, have a proper posture.

[20:11]

This is a practice which is called Upeksha. Upeksha is, that's what Upeksha is. You have to be one. That is called equanimity. Impartiality. Impartiality means no gap between you and Zazen. That time, it is simultaneously, so called, throwing away. Abandonment. To throw away. So, you cannot throw away. How can you throw away? Anyway, you must be in equanimity. That is simultaneity. But you cannot perceive this. That is a problem for us. Please read Ryūbutsu, Yōbutsu, Only a Buddha and Buddha. Documentation about this. That is very Buddhist practice, which is called Buddha.

[21:19]

Buddhist practice. But in daily life, it is very difficult to practice the Upeksha, so called. Cut off or drop off. Keep away from delusions itself. That's why in your daily life, we need compassion. Compassion means we have to take care of, anyway, in many ways. First, you should continue to see yourself. Continue. You have to see yourself for long range. Anyway, see. Until you can see the core of your life. Core of your existence. Anyway, continue to watch.

[22:20]

Continue to watch. Secondly, you have to, anyway, watch yourself until you can touch the core. Anyway, take care. Third, you should wait. Waiting is also very important practice. You can't wait. If you practice Zazen, most people are very irritated because you want to get something quickly as soon as possible. That is not Buddhist practice. You cannot take care of your life in that way. So, wait. Wait means without doing and then wait. It doesn't mean that. In Chinese, there is an old saying says, I don't know whether you know or not.

[23:22]

Literally, let me translate. Maybe you don't understand. Do your best and wait for heavenly order. Do you understand? Do your best and wait for heavenly order. Heavenly order means not order. It doesn't mean the order in heaven comes down to you and helps you. It doesn't mean that. All you have to do is do your best. That is simultaneously, anyway, waiting for the heavenly order. Otherwise, you cannot do your best. Anyway, do your best. Then, do your best means, well, to say, you should sit down here with wholeheartedness means do your best.

[24:32]

In the same. At that time, there is still something you can look at. There is still a self who is looking at Zazen and you itself. In that time, it is not do your best. Do your best means complete one. It means, don't be rigid in Zazen. I am doing. I want to enlighten. I want to get enlightened. That is really rigid. So you cannot make a little space around you. Well, you cannot. No one can enter into you. Even enlightenment cannot enter into your life because you are rigid. This is very common.

[25:33]

We practice always. So, if you sit down, you practice. You sit down there, but you are not you. You are universe. Universe. But you don't believe, but this is. How can you do this? Anyway, do your best. Do your best. That is simultaneously waiting for heavenly order. Something helps your life. For instance, making Buddha statue without words. If you make Buddha statue on words, then if you see the Buddha statue you have made, that is not Buddha statue. It is you. Buddha becomes your face. Exactly your face. Your smells come out from the Buddha statue.

[26:37]

It is very common. But this is okay. But still, you have to continue to call the Buddha on words as object of worship. People can pay homage to this Buddha. As a sculptor, you have to continue to carve that Buddha in that way. Even though you don't know. You don't know how to make. You don't know how to make Buddha statue as an object of worship. People can pay homage. The moment when they look at that, we don't know. But this is the responsibility a sculptor should have, should take. How? Anyway, it is a very simple process. He should hold chisel and start to carve with whole heart.

[27:41]

That's all. Then very naturally, Buddha comes out, not from the wood, from the universe. Buddha is embossed in the universe, not in the wood. So that is a sculptor's practice. Your practice is... Anyway, you exist. Everyday life, wherever you may go. Bakeries, and greens, and on the street. You are you, but you are not you. Anyway, you are something more than you. That is universe. How do you do in that way? Anybody? Do your best. That's all. We call shikkhana. We call shikkhana. And samādhi.

[28:43]

So, wait is very important. Do your best. Wait for heavenly order. We don't know next, what kind of merit I can get or not. We don't know. Only when you exist, right now, right here, as you, and simultaneously with universe, at that time, universe helps you. But we cannot perceive this one. That's why all we have to do is just to do your best. And then, merit is something you should wait for. We don't know when, or we don't know how you can get merit or not. Anyway, just wait. This is the best. And next,

[29:45]

Firstly, you have to, anyway, have deep compassion, deep love, on the basis of the flow of your life. Wherever you are, on the basis of your existence, at the bottom of your life, always, you have deep love. Deep love means compassion, inner compassion, wherever you are. Even though you don't like you, you don't like yourself, or you don't like your karma, past and present, future, well, that's okay, that's alright. But, you have to take care of that life. How? Only when you have deep love, on the basis of a flow of life, at that time, you can really take care of your life.

[30:50]

Without deep love, you cannot take care of your past life, present life, future life. Because, it's pretty easy for us to be confused, upset. If you continually, you should have deep love. Just like a mother, okay? Mother always deep love to her kids, whoever he is, whoever she is. Anyway, even though she cries and screams to the mothers, still, or mother scolds her, whatever she is, anyway, still, child tries to follow the mother, and the mother still watches her over her life. Because, on the basis of mother's life, there is a deep love. Deep compassion.

[31:52]

So, very naturally, mother can take care of babies, and her children. Under all circumstances. It is exactly your life. So, fourthly, please continue to have deep love. Anyway, wherever you are, continue. And then, fifth, at that time, you can know what you should, well, how you can make arrangement of your life. Okay? You can know that. For instance, if you practice like this in the Zen center, but this is a really unusual case. I have never seen in Japan. See, in Japan, Buddhist practice was pretty easy,

[32:55]

because in the age of monastery, monks, all monks, no woman, all monks. So, all I have to do was just to be there. And then, our schedule is set up, and leaders, wonderful Zen masters there, according to the master's suggestion, just to follow. So, if I want to have very strict practice, I can do that. But in this case, it's not so easy. Don't you think so? Even though you said, I want to have strict, you know, Buddhist monk or Buddhist student. Of course, you can do. But if you do that, you become a very natural rigid boy, and people don't like you. It's very natural.

[33:58]

Oh, come on, go ahead. Go away. So, you cannot always do this. So, if you really want to strict Buddhist practice, okay, keep it, be mindful of it, constantly, okay? Idealistically, whatever it is, in many ways, keep it in your mind, constantly. And then, practically in your life, okay? If you want to, well, sometimes people will ask you, hey, let's go to see the movie tonight. Then, because the people like you, okay? So, sometimes you don't want to go. So, very often people ask you, let's go to see the movie. Well, let's imagine, ten times. Ten times a week, people ask you, okay?

[35:00]

But if you take it off like this, I told you anyway. Well, very naturally, how you can make arrangement of your life? If you want to practice strict practice, okay? So, very naturally, maybe you can take, you can take two chances, okay, to see the movie. Eight chances, maybe you can put them aside. Or, sometimes, maybe three. Sometimes, maybe four. Sometimes, none. You can adjust. That is called a picture, okay? Throw away. So, how much you can throw away, how you can make arrangement. But to throw away is not so easy, okay? You cannot throw away everything.

[36:05]

That's why the Buddhism always mentions, you have to practice in serenity first. In the world of serenity, how many beings exist? Countless number of beings exist. And you have to live with all sentient beings anyway, even though you don't like or you like. How? First, anyway, watch your life. Constantly. Secondly, anyway, watch your life constantly until you can touch the core. Touch the core of our existence, what I say, human life. Anyway, third, wait. Wait means do your best and wait for heavenly order. Heavenly order, when or how it comes, we don't know.

[37:09]

It doesn't matter. All you have to do is do your best and wait for heavenly order. And fourth, take care, anyway, yourself. For long age, that time with compassion. For this, you should have a deep love in the basis of your life. Constantly. That time you can handle. If you don't have this deep love, compassion, you can't, you can't take care. Whatever it is, you should have it. This is what is called education. You can educate you and you can educate others. Anyway, you should see yourself for long range, for long range, life after life. Not in this world, life after life. Then, at that time, you can know what you can throw away,

[38:10]

how you can make arrangement. This is called upaksha. Very naturally, delusions drop off, if you practice like this in your daily life. And this is a very practical daily life, daily Buddhist practice, but it's very difficult to practice in your daily life like this. It's too difficult. That's why we have this zazen. Zazen is very simple arrangement of your life. It just improves your life. Just a point. Now, I can, I explain in five points. Five points exactly right in the middle of zazen. This is what is called shikantabha. Shikantabha. That practice is very important for us.

[39:12]

One more point is, what did you say? If you practice Buddhism, if you're a beginner, it doesn't matter different denominations in Buddhism. What's the difference between Rinzai and Soto, it doesn't matter. But if you poke your head into Buddhist study deeply, very naturally, there is a difference there. Soto and Rinzai, and Rinzai use the koan, and Soto doesn't use the koan. How can I use the koan? Etc. Lots of problems come up. So that's why very naturally, Rinzai is completely Rinzai, and Soto is completely Soto, and there are some who don't want to attach to either one of them.

[40:34]

They try to combine. Combine Soto and Rinzai. But I don't care. I don't care. Whatever you practice. Strictly speaking, from now on, we should really understand what is really Buddhist practice. I don't mean we should ignore the koan. Koan is important for us. The koan shouldn't be used by the unmeans, to attain enlightenment itself. Well, at that time, koan becomes a sound you can listen to. Koan becomes something which you want to talk with. It's not koan. Koan is total manifestation of the Buddhist and Patriarch,

[41:40]

which is called universe. So anyway, through the koan, get a taste of what your practice is, Buddhist practice is. First of all, what you can do is, anyway, practice Shikantaro. This is most important. And then, naturally, from that practice, you can really get a taste of the meaning of the koan. Okay? So, I don't mean you should ignore the koan. It's not necessary to use the koan in order to check the value, how much your practice is progressing. If you discuss, very naturally, you can handle koan like this. I don't think so. If you use koan like this, you never touch the core of koan.

[42:41]

Anyway, koan is universe. Total manifestation of the universe. Okay? So, read the koan, and get a taste of it, and listen to the taisho given by teachers about koan, anyway. And then, what you can do is, continue to Shikantaro. So, very naturally, you can understand. Even though you don't understand koan, even though you don't understand Shikantaro, never mind, forget it! Because Shikantaro is a big koan for you, don't you think so? How much do you understand the Shikantaro? You don't understand. Shikantaro is a very big koan for you. In your whole life, anyway. Then, very naturally, you can understand koan.

[43:44]

So, if you are interested in the koan, anyway study it. But don't use it as, as a means, okay? Discussing it, in order to check the value, in order to know how much your practice is going, okay? Because it is already, you are sliding off the mainstream of life and death. So, Shikantaro is, continually, to be in the mainstream of life and death. If you use, even though koan, little bit slightly, you slide off. You don't notice it. So, all you have to do, even though you don't like, you don't like Zazen, you like using koan, just continue sitting.

[44:48]

That is very hard for you. And also, teachers is also hard, to handle such a people who are very greedy, okay? They want spiritual greed. They want to get something. It's very hard. But a teacher must be teacher. Right in front of those people who are very greedy. Very naturally, teacher, Oh, okay, I will give you candy. Be quiet. This is very common. Because if you give something, very naturally, people feel good, and also people can see good result. So, very naturally, it goes, constantly. From century after century. Then it becomes history. If you create history, it's very difficult to destroy. So, very naturally, people follow the history. So, strictly speaking, what is the true Buddhist practice?

[45:50]

Greediness, everyone has greediness, okay? Whatever you do. Because this is very important for you, to get the vitality to live, okay? So, don't destroy greediness. But the point is, how can you use this greediness? If you use greediness as a greediness, greediness becomes a monster. So, anyway, greediness must be dropped off. And then, at that time, greediness achieves wonderful life. How? When you meet one Dharma, you practice it. When you encounter one practice, you practice it. This is really how to use greediness, okay? Then, very naturally, greediness drops off. So, how can you use greediness?

[46:53]

This is very important. That's why in Taisho, Dogen Zenji also, in the Shobo Denzo, teaches explaining and talking about koans. You never use koans as a means, because the koan itself is nothing but the Buddha's body and muscles, skin and bones. We have to get the taste of it. It's not something you can describe objectively. Do you have a question? In Minneapolis,

[48:12]

if you have this big organization, it's a little easier for you to practice. Whatever you feel about Buddhist practice. But if you are in a small group, it's very difficult to continue to practice. Because not much encouragement. Not much encouragement. So, very naturally, people are very irritated and rushing into making complaints. That's pretty hard. Even for the teacher. So, consequently, anyway, a teacher's responsibility is, anyway, to let the people put in the mainstream of life and death, directly, anyway. Even though you make complaints about zazen,

[49:15]

just sitting is ridiculous. Okay, fine. Anyway, sit down. Then, next day, you can feel good. Thank you, Karagi. I realize how important zazen is. Okay, sit down. Anyway, continually, I have to put the people back in the mainstream of life and death. It's very easy for me to give a candy. Oh, yes, you are a enlightened person. So, if you don't like zazen, oh, you can go away, anytime. It's pretty easy for me. Then, if you feel bored, well, I should scream sometimes, in order to encourage you and obviously hit your butt up in order to attain enlightenment. It's pretty easy for teachers and for students

[50:20]

because, continually, to get something, you can talk. But practice completely in serenity and true quietness. It's not so easy. But this is, this is nothing but, this is the exact problem of life and death. You have, okay? Remember that. You never slide off, but we have already lost greediness. That's why we don't know, we don't know. Because we are busy with taking care of greediness, constantly. That's why we don't know. And also, teacher gave, you know, something to nurture the greediness. How can you be free from greediness? Greediness is, can, anyway, it comes from the beginningless past. You cannot, anyway, be free from it immediately.

[51:20]

You cannot do that. Then some teacher said, how about beginners? Beginners don't know how to practice Zazen, so I think you should take care of beginners and the beginners, giving something in order to understand. Well, fine. But I don't think this is right. From the beginning, anyway, you have to give something right. For instance, how can you talk with a baby? Babies don't understand language, even American babies. How can she understand language? So you say, all babies don't understand, doesn't understand language, so what kind of language should I give? Can you do this? No way! See? Still you are talking with a baby, using directly your language,

[52:22]

that language. The same applies to practice too, OK? Remember this. I don't mean you should, you know, distinguish between Rinzai and Soro, it's ridiculous, but, anyway, from now on, we have to understand what is real Buddhist practice, beyond Japanese or Chinese or Indian Buddhism, anyway. How we should practice this real Buddhist practice into American life. So, even if you are advanced students or beginners, teaching monks, our teacher's responsibility is to give right practice. Maybe you are very hard, it's very hard for you, but teachers are also hard, OK? So, continue,

[53:23]

and you will put them back, put you back, right in the middle of the stream of life. That's pretty good for you, OK? So this, how you can practice let's go hand in hand, OK? That's where we need help, each other. In Minneapolis, I have always a little difficult, because small group, and also we don't have such a fantastic facility together, so everyone come from the outside, below the fifteen, fifteen below, you know, people can come to the Zen Center in the morning four o'clock, for thirty or so. Can you imagine? It's cold. But if they come, so, I really give sympathy

[54:25]

to those people. I really appreciate and admire. But all we have to do is, you continue to be in the mainstream of life and death, OK? Because you are there, your life is exactly like this, OK? No slide off, OK? Nothing to slide off. We have to learn. And then, finally, you can be free from human greediness, OK? From the beginning, anyway, teacher has to give. This is the Buddha's teaching. Buddha's patriarch gives like this, OK? When I was a temporary, I just lived with my teachers. When I was in the age monastery,

[55:25]

perhaps I was going to be a monk there. Just to follow the schedule. Sit down, sit down. Lots of encouragement. But when I came back to the temple, living with the old men, it's very difficult. Perhaps no encouragement. But he didn't say anything, he didn't give any suggestion how to live. But now I understand this. He just always put me right in the mainstream of life and death. He didn't notice. Because my greediness is making constantly loud music, OK? I am young, I want to learn something. Why don't you give something to me? You are a teacher, I am a disciple. I was making complaints.

[56:28]

But he didn't do anything. That's pretty hard for me. But I understand now, I appreciate my teacher. But I often don't believe that teacher is just like this, OK? Many different types of teachers, OK? But whoever they are, when you see the teacher, that is your teacher, OK? Don't look around. Don't look about for her, OK? Then just to practice. All you have to do is continually put yourself in the mainstream of life and death. It is completely serene, total. When you do the show, just do the show. Do your best. Wait for him in your life.

[57:24]

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