Many of her years It's nice to see everyone. I'd like to open today with an old Japanese proverb.

[02:09]

The more ripe a cluster of rice becomes, the lower it bows down its head. Jake, do you want to move a little closer? Something. Okay. So today I wanted to talk about the practice of humility and the reason for this is because I spent an evening with a contemplative group recently And the speaker, who happens to be a Benedictine oblet, spoke on the twelve stages of humility. So, this was very inspiring and sparked an interest in me.

[03:18]

And I got something from that talk that I hadn't realized before and I wanted to share that with you. There is some background to this though. There's a couple stages that are kind of a background to the twelve stages of humility. And those two stages are, from one perspective anyway, the growing-up stage and the maturing stage. So in the growing-up stage, people are very supportive and help us to pursue our ideals and be the best we can be. And it's a time of self-affirmation, self-enhancement, self-betterment.

[04:26]

And the avenue is really broad. So we can make mistakes and people are very kind and patient with us and just keep encouraging us. Sometimes during this stage we can become quite full of ourselves and competitive and kind of self-indulgent or conceited maybe even a little bit. But at some point we realize that all this grandiosity is not really helping us or helping others and we start to understand ourselves a little better and realize that all this greatness can be used to help other people. So this is a time of self-understanding

[05:32]

and growth. When we start to mature sometimes our teacher can become quite strict with us and he or she might seem kind of mean. So the avenue starts to narrow. we can put one toe in the dokasan room and he or she says, get out, come back with a better attitude. So, you can't get to the maturing stage without going through the growing up stage. Sometimes it takes people longer to get to the maturing stage, sometimes until they're almost 50 years old, and sometimes a lot longer.

[06:43]

And some of us mature, some aspects of ourselves mature faster than maybe someone else's, that aspect of someone else, but there are other aspects of them that mature faster than those aspects in ourselves. So, you know, the teacher starts to test us, so he seems testy, and we may not like it, but this is the way, often, this is the way that he or she finds out if we've matured or not. So, at this time, when we realize we're maturing, it's really important to stay aware of how we respond to things that are happening in our lives. Are we level-headed or are we still defensive?

[07:48]

Are we pointing our fingers at others and blaming them? Or are we looking inside and seeing how it is that we contributed to the situation? Because ultimately, even though the urge to say, it's not me, it's them. It often is really only our own behavior that we can change, and that might mean staying away from those people that upset us, too. So, Grace was telling me this really great comment that Peter Schneider made, which is, may all beings get over themselves. So it's not only us who have to get over themselves, but they do too, but it's not for us to decide they have to get over themselves. That's their business.

[08:52]

So we can just let them do their thing and take care of ourselves and see how we can manage those relationships better. So, We just did the Bodhisattva ceremony. I was in Mel's office listening. And taking those vows is humbling, but it's only humbling if you can take it in. So our approach to practice has to be humble, in a humble way. And this is what Skip, the speaker at this event that I went to, was pointing out, if we're so sure of ourselves, we can't be open to the Buddhist teaching.

[09:56]

So if we think we already know it, we already know everything, there's nothing more to learn. So this is when I realized that humility is the same as, or very close to, beginner's mind that we talk of. So, as the saying goes, in the beginner's mind there are many possibilities, in the expert's mind there are few. So, when we lose our beginner's mind, we lose... Well, this can impede our realization of the Dharma. And it's really important to continue to look at our limitations and our human existence, which includes limitations and flaws,

[11:11]

In the Platform Sutra, Master Huina is found pointing out to one of his students who had been boasting about his vast knowledge of a major Buddhist sutra, that it seemed to him that his knowledge of the sutra had actually fettered his mind and not liberated it. So that's the point here. We're trying to liberate ourselves. to be free from greed, hate, and delusion. We're not trying to get it right. I also went to a wonderful retreat in the Sequoias a couple weekends ago, and Myo Wan Grace Shearson Sensei was speaking on the Zen mind training slogans or the Tibetan Lojong trainings.

[12:24]

And there's 59 of them. But I noticed my tendency right away to want to master all of them immediately. So I had to slow down and remember that my approach to these trainings, which I'm going through now daily. Grace has made this wonderful, with one of her students, workbook. So here's the Zen Mind Trainings, and each page is... I'm not exactly plugging Grace, but I realize as I'm doing it I am. Each page has one more slogan. And then up here you can write your experience of working with this slogan. So sometimes it takes me a couple of days. This one is 29. It says, give up all your fantasies about being rewarded.

[13:30]

So true. Akinroshi put it this way, he said, it's not the perfection of practice, it's not the perfection of practice, it's the practice of perfection. There's also the story of Shinran, who was one of the founders of the Jodo Shinshu school, or Pure Land, school, and he went to study with Honen, who he'd heard had attained Buddhahood. Shinran himself was, well, aspired to be a Buddha, and he just couldn't do it somehow, and more and more he just felt depressed and miserable.

[14:33]

So, he went to see Honen, and he did see a Buddha in him. But the Buddhahood that he saw was totally different from what he had anticipated. So he thought that he was going to meet someone who was holy and good and possessed of wonderful virtues. But when he met Honen, he met a student and somebody who was worshiping and respecting the Dharma. And Honan was just identifying himself as a student of Shan Dao, who was another Pure Land master, and told Shinran that the most important thing for him was to just follow his teacher's teaching he wasn't really going anywhere or trying to achieve anything.

[15:38]

So, over and over again we hear, practice with no gaining mind. So, the Buddha was being very kind in saying, practice with no gaining mind, because he knew he'd already experienced this, that there's nothing to attain. So, you know, there are no rewards here. The Buddha had a big experience and he didn't go and buy a timeshare in Cabo San Lucas and hang out there for six months out of the year. He took his experience and traveled around and told other people about it to help them. That's what we're doing here. taking the teaching and learning how to help other people. So there's a way that we can fall into... I'm talking about myself here.

[16:43]

There's a way I've fallen into perfecting practice in a self-centered way. and trying to be good. And so we have this kind of objective idea of what a Buddha is, but subjectively, what would a Buddha say about himself or herself? They would say, I'm flawed and foolish, and so I keep practicing. They wouldn't say, I'm so wonderful, you know, I'm going to go tell people how wonderful I am. So, I think that sometimes we think the goal here is to be good, avoid all evil, do all good, but really I think, or I begin to understand that it's about being humble, staying open to not losing our beginner's mind and continuing to practice in a way that benefits, helps ourselves,

[18:09]

and then helps other people. So, a lot of our anguish and grief is about self-importance. And if we can let go of our self-importance we don't care whether people honor or respect us or like us or not. So when we realize that we're nothing, we're actually everything. So it's really, you can have a big experience, and this might help you. with your faith in the practice. But you have to keep, anybody who's had a big experience has to keep practicing and will probably continue to make mistakes if they're not very careful.

[19:21]

So these experiences can also help realize that we're not separate, that we're radically interconnected. And I think it's just really important to remember that, even if you don't experience life that way. It's really important to remember that wherever you are, that this person that you see outside of yourself is an expression of yourself. And in this way, there will be no more I or mine.

[20:32]

and your tendencies to perpetuate this separateness in ways that are harmful either to yourself or others will decrease. So here are some If this is a little post-test, this is what I do at work. I give competencies and then I give post-tests. So see how we do. And if people are up for it, I'll read the 12 Stages of Humility, which is a Christian text, but I think it's pertinent here. This is a list I got. I can't remember where I got it anymore, but maybe off the internet somewhere.

[21:38]

Don't know whose list this is. Behave without arrogance. Self-conceit and other egoist tendencies such as jealousy and an impulse to show off. Respect others and show a genuine human interest in them without a desire to please or to impress. While we do not recognize self-depreciation or self-effacement as part of humility, I think that's a really important point, while we do not recognize self-depreciation or self-effacement as part of humility, we must recognize that our biological self is fraught with frailties and ignorance, and that a true self, characterized by such divine quality as love, compassion, joy and wisdom, is innate in every one of us.

[22:39]

Weekly or even daily, review our behavior. A true test of our willingness to humble ourselves is being willing to share with others our weaknesses Wisdom, however, informs us to do so with others that we trust. Take wrong patiently. When someone is unjust, we want to react and rectify it. However, patiently responding to unjust accusations and actions of others demonstrates strength of character and provides an opportunity to put on humility. Our culture does not value submission. Rather, it promotes individualism. Receive correction and feedback from others graciously. Graciously receiving any negative feedback or correction, graciously receive any negative feedback or correction offered, one may say.

[23:46]

Thank you for caring enough to share that with me. I will think about it and get back to you. Yeah, right. But I think that's good. That's a good way to, we could try that. Look for the kernel of truth. In any case, look for the kernel of truth in what people offer you, even if it comes from a dubious source. Accept a low place If you find yourself wanting to sit at the head table, wanting others to recognize your contribution, or become offended when others are honored or chosen, then pride is present. Support others being recognized rather than you. Accept and look for the low place. This is the place of humility. Purposely associate with people of lower state than you.

[24:50]

Our culture is very status conscious and people naturally want to socialize upward. Resist the temptation of being partial to those with status or wealth. You can come hang out with me. Spend time with people who bug you. Get close to them. They are our best teachers. Choose to serve others. Doing so reduces our focus on ourselves and builds selflessness rather than self. When serving another costs us nothing, we should question whether or not it is really serving. Be quick to forgive. Forgiveness is one of the greatest acts of humility. To forgive is to acknowledge a wrong that has been done to us and also to further release our right of repayment for the wrong. Forgiveness is denial of self. Forgiveness is not insisting on our way and our justice.

[25:54]

Cultivate a grateful heart. The more we develop an attitude of gratitude for being able to practice and hear the Dharma, the more true our perspective of self. A grateful heart is a humble heart. Speak well of others. Saying negative things about others puts them one down and us one up, a form of pride. Speaking well of others edifies them and builds them up instead of us. Make sure, however, that what you say is not intended as flattery. Pride is not about us. It is our nature to be proud, and it is our true nature that brings humility. Committing to a lifestyle of daily dying to self is the foundation of true humility. When I was looking into this, I came across a little joke, which I'm going to try to tell.

[27:08]

It's short. I'm just not very good at telling jokes. Simply, there was a nice church-going fellow who went to church every Sunday, and the members of his congregation gave him a little medal on a ribbon for being the most humble man in church. So, the following Sunday, he wore it on his shirt. And so they took it away from him. But, that's it. I wanted to say one thing more about karma, and then I'll read through the 12 stages of humility, if people would like to hear them. And I wish... Actually, I know that my teacher here, Sojin Roshi, did over and over again say something about karma.

[28:23]

But I wish he was more emphatic or I wish I listened better, because I'm realizing that you really cannot escape your karma. And not to scare you, but... So I get to sit up here because I'm benefiting from my good karma. So thank you. But there are other ways that I'm reaping my karma that are very entangled and difficult. And I wish I'd really understood that a long time ago. So, be careful. So, would people like to hear the Twelve Stages of Humility?

[29:28]

This is a nice little book called, Always We Begin Again, The Benedictine Way of Living, which actually somebody from my group gave to me. I don't know why. But I notice on this page before it says, Consider the value of silence and community. Our ability to listen should be our gift to those around us. Too much talk is a sign of self-centeredness and insecurity. If you hear yourself talking excessively, take care. The 12 Stages of Humility. These are the stages to freedom from self-centeredness, to humility, the centerpiece of the true life. The first stage of humility is to keep the sacred nature of consciousness and the world in which it exists always alive within us.

[30:39]

Everything we think, everything we do, everything we feel is cast in time forever. Each moment that we live is irreplaceable. Therefore, each moment is hallowed. We must be on guard against despair, against fear, against bitterness, against self-seeking, and have the tenacity and courage to think optimistically and act affirmatively. and to put the needs of others always before our own. The second stage of humility is to distrust our own will. Our wants are insatiable and our will is the product of those wants. Our pleasure, our needs, our wishes, all are mere self-interest and the demands of self-interest are never-ending. Our desires are the path to disaster. At every turn there is something more to acquire, something to distract our attention, something to divert the unchangeable footprints we leave behind.

[31:43]

Day and night we must return to humility and use it as a compass to guide us on the true course. Therefore, the second stage of humility is not to love our own will nor to find pleasure in the satisfaction of our own desires, but to carry out the unfathomable, unfathomable, purpose of our being to fulfill the design that can only be discovered by overcoming our own cravings for the function of existence and of our lives is not ourselves. The third stage of humility is to accept our limitations even to death, to accept that there are events outside our control which will control us and that have ultimate power over us and that our will will not be done. The fourth stage of humility is to be patient and to maintain a quiet mind, even in the face of inequity, injury and contradiction, preserving the certitude that we are continuously shaped by experience and refined by fire, and accordingly to be thankful even for injuries.

[32:53]

The fifth stage of humility is to not conceal our faults, but to be ruthlessly honest with ourselves and about others. For to lie to ourselves or to others is to falsify our relationship with true life. The sixth stage of humility is to be content with the work we are given to do and with the circumstances of our lives, however unfair or demeaning. consistently bearing in mind that it is our outlook that confers value on our experiences and that nothing that occurs to us is intrinsically good or bad. The seventh stage of humility is not only to declare ourselves to be humble but to believe in our hearts that we are of no consequence. For alone we are of no moment. In the vast reaches and endless memory of the universe Our most profound idea is the merest fantasy.

[33:56]

Our greatest triumphs and our meanest actions are as lasting as a mark in sand. The eighth stage of humility is that we take no action except that which is in accordance with the path established for us by word and by example, by those whom we know to be true guides, both past and present, always mistrusting our own ideas and wills. The ninth stage of humility is that we refrain from judgment. It is not for us to live the lives of others or to understand the infinite forces at work. at every instant in another's life. We must restrain not only our criticism, but also our advice, offering it only when requested, and then only with sincere misgiving. The tenth stage of humility is to refrain from taking pleasure in the losses of others. If we have sincere empathy, we can never believe ourselves superior to one another, nor to take pleasure in each other's shortcomings and misfortunes,

[35:05]

The 11th stage of humility is to speak gently and briefly. Participation in community requires that we speak and also that we listen. In speech, we must be candid. In listening, we must be accessible. The 12th stage of humility is to maintain not only humble thoughts, but also a humble demeanor, whether at work or on the road or at the market or in speaking or at rest. we should continuously reinforce through appearance and demeanor the mean of humility. By daily pursuing these intentions, we will begin to observe these precepts through habit rather than by discipline, and in consequence, after long practice, we will sometimes accomplish these goals as our natural manner. So, thank you for listening to me.

[36:15]

And now, someone else can say something if they like. Judy. Thank you. I have a question about the quotation you made from Vipin Roshan. And I'm just wondering if you could tell us what you understand to be the meaning of What was it? It's not, he said, it's not something along the lines of, it's not the perfection of practice, it's the practice of perfection. What do you understand to mean, that to me? Well, I can fall into... I'm a perfectionist. You know this expression, that person is a perfectionist. So I like to do things correctly.

[37:20]

And in that way, I can really get into thinking that I am doing it correctly, when really the correctness of it is in my own mind. So I would say that, I would say very carefully that the practice of perfection is action that is free of self or free of self-centeredness. Dean, long time no see. I wasn't talking about you. But one of the things you said is, and I'm paraphrasing so long, correct me, is we must realize our self-indulgence, our arrogance, or whatever, all that stuff, before we can make a change.

[38:57]

And I want you to say just a little bit more about that, because I'm not sure that I agree with that. On the other hand, we're in such agreement about what might be, if I understand your idea better. Okay. Probably one reason why I started looking into humility is because I have sciatica. I can't sit cross-legged for very long anymore. Excuse me. What do I think about that? What I think is that, I think we have to have a really healthy sense of self before we can let go of it. So if your conditioning is from childhood, let's just say, or at least this is the psychological point of view.

[40:03]

I'm not sure if this is what you're meaning or not. But we have to have a healthy sense of ourselves And a lot of us don't have that when we come to practice, and that is the reason why we come to practice. So it takes us a while to catch up. I don't think you can let go of self from subterranean. You have to kind of come up to a certain level before you can start letting go of it. Is that what you mean? So mostly it was the word about that we need to realize it before it can change. And I think now that you said that, I'm wondering, do you think, did you mean we need to realize it consciously, or can that change occur without that conscious realization of those self-indulgent arrogance?

[41:11]

Well, I can only talk about myself. I don't know how it is for other people. Well, yesterday we were talking about returning to practice. So we have the guidelines, you know. We have these. We have this. So we have all sorts of stuff. And I think that's what we have to do, is just return to practice. And you know the story about the monk walking through the mist, the misty forest, and he gets to the end of his walk and he realizes his robes are soaking wet. So it's like little by little, something happens. And you might have some big experience along the way that helps you with your faith and that practice will help you.

[42:20]

But I think it happens without us noticing. And I think even if you do, like I was saying, even if you do have a big experience, that's not the end. The bag of stuff is at Alan and Lori's. I didn't want to leave it in the community room. Drugs. Elbow, Isabeth? Your very first call, you called it a Japanese proverb. I think, and it was so long ago, maybe you could repeat it, and then it seems to be a day of asking you, what do you think of this? And I wanted to, the image really struck me. I think I was thinking of a sangha.

[43:25]

I don't know if you heard it, but do you mind? The more ripe a cluster of rice becomes, the lower it bows down its head. So when you mature, hopefully. And I can't say anything more about it. Oh, it was really nice. Yeah, it was really nice. Bob, and Brad, and David, and Chickie, and Joel, and a lot of people were there, and the other, and Skip's group. Bob's here today, too.

[44:27]

Well, that's, you know, that's not true. Yeah, I think we are missing joy, and I think... Yeah, it does, you know, kind of cloudy Saturday morning in Berkeley, you know, it's the fog, so they're all socked in here. So, I don't know if that affects our talks here or not, but it seems pretty bright out in the valley and smells good. It smells like bay and oak trees and sunlight. Eucalyptus. I think we can get really serious and it's not necessary. somebody who's not so serious, we can get too serious.

[46:24]

And the practice, I think, can bring us a lightness. And there's one person here who I know is my my joy keeper, but I'm not going to point her out because she would be embarrassed. But there are people here who practice joy, so they can model that for us. I think my joy is more cheeky or it's more like mischief than joy, but I do enjoy humor too. So thank you for bringing that up. Cherry. a talk that I heard Rev.

[47:30]

Anderson give, and he quoted Dogen at the end of his practice, and he said that when he started practicing, there were 10,000 things that he didn't know, and now after 25 years of practice, there were 10,000 things that he didn't know. I felt this great sense of relief and joy, because there are certainly 20 or 30 or 40 or 50 things I don't know, It actually was this relief, kind of for me, of kind of practicing that it doesn't matter how much, there's no getting any place. And so it was kind of a relief that even our father figure kind of just was there in the not knowing. And that was a really fun place to be. It was like a lighter feeling. Yeah, gosh, don't stress. You're not going anywhere, just enjoy being here.

[48:31]

You know, just relax. Yeah, we can get so, you know, serious and pent up and trying to do everything right and life is just too short to spend time in that place. And it's not good for our health either. Laurie? This may be too big of a question, I don't know, but when you're talking, I feel like I want to, like when we do these practices, you know, like when you talked about slogans or humility, it's like where we're trying to cultivate something that we sort of have or we have a little and we're trying to grow it or something.

[49:32]

It's like, where's the line between that and just being phony or something. I don't feel that from you at all, especially the moment when I really thought it was when someone corrects you and you say, thank you very much. It's like, okay, then you said it a lot of different ways. I guess it's sort of like, I know you bought from some fake until you make it, but would you ever think, you know, would we check to make sure we were getting close to them? You know, like, it just brings up some questions to me about where is what's actually happening coming, you know, which is maybe different from... I think it's different for everyone, and I think sometimes it's just best to keep your mouth closed and withdraw until you can be authentic. So if you have some inspiration, I think then there's something authentic about it.

[50:36]

If you're not having inspiration, just wait. And it might take a long time. I've talked to several people just in the past few days who are having a really tough time with somebody or another, you know, which I can relate to. And You know, I said, well, do you use your this and that training to, you know, approach them and just get that all figured out? And they're like, I haven't talked to them in three years, no way. So, you know, at some point, you know, something cracks open for us and we can, I don't know how that is, but, And Grace told me, she said, just get really close to those people who bug you. And I said, okay. So I did. And you know what? The first experience, the first time I did that, it really worked. I just dove in. And the person I did that with was kind of like, what's with you?

[51:39]

What happened? What changed? And maybe that's not quite the right approach, but it worked for me. I know it felt true. It did. It didn't feel like you were pretending. It did. Something, I just kind of pushed through something. Just, I was, but I was also in the, you know, I was right to do that. To get over myself. Okay. What do I do? I guess I could turn this off or something.

[52:19]

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