It brought me into a very bad situation. Do you remember the hot drink statement yesterday evening? Yes, good. So if the horizon of my practice, let's say, is here, then I would say this statement started somewhere here, just before the horizon, and ended there. And now I'm in the middle of this feeling of being on both sides of the horizon of my own practice. And I need a little courage to sit here with this feeling. I had a second version in petto of what I could have said.

[01:04]

And the second version would have made sense in the background is completely a harmony point. Nothing with a mask on and what's behind it. Yes. But the very last sentence, where I said, if we are at this point, the context, there is the background. And maybe, I never know exactly, but I hope I say something about the background in this lecture. In any case, let's take it this way, there is something like a background of the experience, the contents of the experience, and the field in which the contents appear, i.e.

[02:16]

the background, that which in the way in which each and every one of us experiences this moment as reality, That which is already in there, but is not seen by itself. This moment of reality can be experienced in so many different ways. And we normally... a spirit of consciousness, we see the content. So, for example, I sit here, then I am one content, the sitting and the others. But this moment could also be experienced in a completely different way.

[03:20]

So I hope that we can feel that a little bit in the course of the lecture, what exactly the background of the experience is, to take it into the experience, to take it into the experience, what that exactly means. In any case, the context was to say, That even the background loses its balance. What is behind it? What is behind the background? Diese Art von innerer Geste, diese Art von, wenn es so etwas gibt, wie wenn wir unsere Erfahrungen untersuchen, dann haben wir vielleicht so etwas wie einen inneren Blick. Kennt ihr das? So ein innerer Blick, ein inneres Auge, einen inneren Blick auf die Erfahrung. Und mit diesem Auge immer wie noch,

[04:21]

to move further back or further down. I believe that this is different for different people and also in different moments. Sometimes there is also this feeling that something is showing up and to take off the mask. And then it shows up even differently. And then sometimes it opens up and to take off the mask again opens up even further. And then I said, if we are at this point, then there are no borders. The blue sky should be ashamed that it is so small. This last sentence is from Muso Soseki. Maybe some of you know him. And Musa Soseki brings it into a slightly different context.

[05:23]

He says, oh, I have left all my problems, all my worries behind me. I practice playfully and joyfully away from the world. By the way, I don't think that's Unser Dharma Sangha Zen, wir praktizieren gar nicht fernab der Welt. Wir praktizieren vielleicht eher inmitten der Welt, mit gleichzeitig aber einem Fuß, der, ein Fuß, der außerhalb der Welt steht und ein Fuß, der mitten in der Welt steht. One eye, when you look at Suzuki Roshi's picture, very often he has pulled up one eyebrow. It can be a real experience. One eye that looks into the middle of the world and one eye that looks through the world.

[06:28]

One looks in, one looks through. And so, Musa Soseki and I know in his life that was his life theme. Does he practice in the world or does he practice away from the world? And he was someone you always wanted to drag into the world. The emperors wanted to instrumentalize him politically. He was perhaps the most respected. Lehrer seiner Zeit. Und er selber hatte so überhaupt kein Interesse daran. Das hat ihn alles nur gestört und verwirrt. Und er wollte eigentlich immer viel lieber, er hat sich mehrfach in seinem Leben irgendwo weit ab in den Bergen eine Hütte gebaut, sich da zehn Jahre lang niedergelassen, bis ihn wieder jemand gefunden hat.

[07:33]

Und dann haben sie ihn wieder rausgeholt aus seiner Hütte. Das hat er, glaube ich, drei, vier Mal in seinem Leben gemacht. Yes, it was his topic. And it was probably just when he wrote this poem, it was maybe just the time when he practiced away from the world. But he says the blue sky should or should be ashamed that he is so small. And he says, since something has become clear to me, what gave me the courage to say the statement yesterday, he says, for a person of Zen, there are no limits. Yes, so... Zen, and also Dhamma Sangha Zen, is just a school.

[08:35]

And this school teaches certain teachings. And everything that we do, or especially the practice period and Ein Tzu Chin, are something like... which over the centuries, from generation to generation, has changed a lot. In English, we might say, our best shot. What we currently say, the best possible conditions that we know at the moment These are the conditions from which we believe that these conditions give the greatest chance to create a true human being in this school.

[09:44]

How far each individual on all the different levels, emotionally, mentally, and also from the point of view of life decisions, how far each individual wants to get involved in this school. That is free. That is completely free. And that has always been free. In the choir, it means that it was always one of the most important sentences for me, even when I was just thinking about whether I wanted to be ordained or not. That was an important decision for me, because it's already with the step to ordination, you really decide for this school. You say, okay, I'll go through this school now. And I bring my life now. In this understanding of practice alone. And so insofar as that was a big decision, a big threshold, and there was always one sentence that was very important to me from some koan, was take freely.

[11:06]

Take free, in principle, I always have that for myself, I can take free what I need. And leave the rest. And just leave the rest. Auch diese Haltung schwingt gerade in der Zen-Schule immer mit. Take freely and leave the rest. Aber trotzdem ist der, wie Suzuki Roshi sagt, der Weg des Bodhisattvas, der bleibt immer der gleiche. Take freely, leave the rest. Yeah. Okay, so there is a school in there, there is a basic understanding, namely the basic understanding that in this school our narrative, so to speak, is not to have a narrative.

[12:21]

Our script is not to have a script. At the same time, we are nothing but script. Look at the time plants. Everything is scripted. Yes, yes and no. Yes and no. That's just a contradiction in my head, I think. Because... the processes and especially the scripts for the processes are there so that inner scripts have to be released. The conditions should create something like a necessity, and I think they do that too, create a necessity that inner scripts keep on attacking.

[13:30]

Sometimes with the outer scripts, sometimes with swing, oh, that's great. And sometimes in great tension, oh, that's terrible. And sometimes just running around so neutrally. Sometimes they're in resonance, sometimes they're in harmony, sometimes they're in dissonance. But... Always in there, because there is a clear school script, we can remember all our individual scripts in there. That's the trick. That's the trick. And because it's not about having no script, but about remembering and letting go of your own script, that's why it's the method of choice of this Zen school. Und dann ist das Skript halt so geschrieben, dass die einzelnen Gesten, es ist ein sehr gestisches Skript, es ist ein Skript, das in allererster Linie Haltungen, räumliche Konstellationen und Pace, also eine zeitliche, auch sowas wie zeitliche Abfolgen

[14:49]

verschreibt, vorschreibt. Und insofern, also dieses Skript ist so geschrieben, idealerweise, dass es uns dabei helfen kann, egal wie unkonventionell bis hin zu absurd die Tätigkeit selber ist, wie zum Beispiel der Service, For some, at least. For others, I know, service is... Some people love it, some think it's terrible. There's little in between, I think. But in this script, it's written that the attitudes, always attitudes, physical attitudes, that... need attention, like in the Uriyoki.

[15:53]

Each of these gestures needs attention, needs two hands. A few little things. We take the Setsu in the Uriyoki. We take it between, we put it here between these two fingers and there. We don't take it like that. When we normally touch a pen or something, we always take it like this, with our fingertips. We take the Setsu like this. So, und dann drehen wir es herum. Wenn wir diese kleinen, dieses kleine Fleckchen, diese zwei kleinen Fleckchen Körper benutzen, das ist sowas wie, vom Teaching her, das ist sowas wie eine der vielen dunklen Seiten des Körpers. If you take something with your fingertips, then you often take it with a cognitive attention. But if you touch something with your feet, for example, or with the dark, I'll send it with the parts of the body that are usually not penetrated with cognitive energy, but rather simply with physical energy.

[17:03]

What cognitive energy should be in here? I don't need that for anything cognitive. then we activate the dark layers of the body that are not connected to the surface of consciousness. And that's how our scripts are written, again and again, in between these little things. Yes. Okay, I want to go back to this hot drink statement. In this first sentence that I just picked up again from Yuan Wu, go directly into your own existence. Okay.

[18:11]

Where am I actually going? Paula, in your favorite poem, asks Pessoa, Fernando Pessoa sits at the window and says something like this, I look out the window, look at the street. This is one of the windows where one of the many unknown, where one of the many nobodies, one of the many unknown people sits. Er schreibt, die Menschen kennen mich nicht. Vielleicht meint er die Menschen, die von der Straße hoch zu seinem Fenster blieben. Die Menschen kennen mich nicht. Und wenn sie mich kennen würden, was würden sie kennen? Wenn die anderen dich kennen würden, was würden sie kennen? Geh direkt zu deiner eigenen Existenz. And I said, I find there wilderness, a wilderness that I almost forgot.

[19:20]

A mapless land. Mapless, under all the maps. Under all the, sometimes accompany us, there is our own existence. We go directly there. There is nothing to say. We go directly there. And Sofort, manchmal sofort, kommt eine Schicht hinein, wo wir uns etwas über unsere Existenz erzählen. Irgendwas. Manchmal ist es Schicht über Schicht. Wir unsere eigene Existenz wie mit einem Gedankenstrom immer wieder begleiten. And Yuan Wu says, no, don't do it, but stay directly in your own existence. This here itself, this is a real, this, this, to do it again and again, to go back again and again, directly into your own existence.

[20:31]

is already a huge task, but also one of the core skills in practice. And how do we do that? I think you all know the methods, but just to name them for the very practical level. to bring the attention to physical reality over and over again. And to distinguish between that, that is, reality, because there is a difference between the image of the body and the reality of the body. And very quickly this happens to me too. I bring my attention to the body. And very quickly I'm back almost like in an image of the body. To actually stay in the reality is not that easy at all.

[21:35]

And it has to be renewed over and over again. Constantly. Over and over again. That's just how it is. That's how you notice it. That's just nothing that lasts on its own. Over and over again. Over and over again. Yeah. Yes, such an uncarted country. And we don't know anything about it. We don't have a map for that. We can only notice it by pressing. But as I said, from there on, from there on, there is no script. the attention to bring it there, where it is not mapped. And from there, then, in the moment with others, so actually in life, if you will, to enter life, from this point on, you can always briefly, in between, unfold free moments, like vacation, moments without a script.

[22:51]

Weil das kann man sich ja auch mal fragen, wie komme ich denn überhaupt, was soll das bedeuten, wie komme ich überhaupt in so einen Moment ohne Skript hinein? Naja, also das schon einfach durch eine bestimmte Art, die Aufmerksamkeit wirklich körperlich zu verorten. In der Körperlichkeit der Welt und der Körperlichkeit des Körpers. Yes, and that's the point where I have a little bit of the feeling, wow, if we linger there, yes, there is, and yes, Heraclitus says, you may know this metaphor, the human never steps twice,

[23:56]

In denselben Fluss hinein. Kennt ihr das? Er sagt im Prinzip, der Fluss, alles wandelt sich. Und der Mensch tritt hinein, aber er kann nicht zweimal hineintreten. Das ist sein Bild. Es gibt eine... pendant dazu, das sich einige tausend Kilometer weiter östlich geschrieben wurde, wo auch der Mensch in Beziehung zum Fluss des Lebens beschrieben wird. Ich glaube, aus dem Hojoki ist das. Und da heißt es, der strömende Fluss fließt unaufhörlich. Der Darauf stehende Schaum verweilt nie lang auf dem Wasser. Und dann heißt es, so ist es um den Menschen und seine Wohnung gestellt.

[25:01]

Diese zwei Metaphern, wenn wir uns die mal kurz wirklich im Detail anschauen, dann sind sie zuerst, als ob sie fast gleich sind. Da ist der Mensch und der Fluss. Dieses Gefühl, dass tatsächlich alles fließt. Alles immer im Wandel begriffen ist. Nur in dem einen Bild ist es, als ob der Mensch hineinsteigt in den Fluss. Er selber aber vom Fluss eigentlich unberührt bleibt. Der Mensch steigt hinein. Es ist, als ob der Mensch dem Fließen etwas entgegenstellen kann, nämlich sich selbst. Und in dem anderen Bild, da ist der Mensch und seine Wohnung, ist wie der Schaum, der kurz auf der Wasseroberfläche verweilt. und dann aber mit zerläuft der Wandel durchdringt in diesem anderen Bild auch uns das ist das, wo der Hintergrund immer wieder auch seine Balance verliert und

[26:13]

There is a word, kokoro, in Japanese. Kokoro means heart spirit. And I just learned in Frankfurt that Kokoro, at the congress where I was a few days ago, that the word Kokoro originally comes from a loud painting. And the loud painting is from when you hear a ball jumping down a staircase. Kokoro, Kokoro, Kokoro, there the ball jumps. And as far as the experience goes, that you don't lift the ball, oh no, it runs down the stairs, you can't lift it anymore, it just jumps. And that's why the word kokoro comes. And the heart-spirit is in this kind of kokoro, kokoro, the own innermost, the own heart-spirit is like the ball that jumps down the stairs. That's a completely different picture of innerness than, let's say, the soul.

[27:18]

Oder auch das Ich, das relativ, wenn man so lange mal das Gefühl hat, dass das relativ beständig in einer sich verändernden Welt unterwegs ist. Kokoro ist nicht relativ beständig in einer sich verändernden Welt unterwegs, sondern verändert sich die ganze Zeit mit und schöpft sich von Moment zu Moment neu. Je nach Umständen. This is the idea. A Zen person, and if you want to walk through the school of Zen, then you will become a person who creates himself from every moment, according to the circumstances. In response, In Antwort auf die Umstände. Ah, so, okay. Und dann nehme ich mehr oder weniger meine Form in Antwort auf die Umstände, aber wurzelnd in den Gelöbnissen ein.

[28:27]

When we try to bring in a bit of a craft level, the art of practice, we try to discuss it a bit. Then... First of all, as a prerequisite, three aspects from the earliest Buddhism. This is even a teaching from Buddha himself. From the earliest Buddhism, the teaching of Diti. to have right views. And this is a certain dhiti, to teach yourself. And I think through being trusted over time, not from one day to the next, but over time, through one's own difficulties, to sit through it and to walk through it and to keep yourself in a Sangha and Dharma context over and over again, we develop right views.

[29:45]

And the most important distinction is to be able to distinguish within yourself whether something is wholesome or unwholesome. You can say healing or not healing. You can also say that it is beneficial for the practice or not beneficial for the practice. This basic distinction is something like an inner compass. And that's a kind of sensitivity. which in my eyes is an important aspect for a practitioner, to really develop this inner sensitivity. Is what is happening here right now, is it beneficial for the practice? And in the background, his own experience, a little bit like a scale or something like that, to hold on to your own experience. Actually, I feel quite good right now, but I think my practice is a little bit flat.

[30:52]

This is to have this sensitivity. I think I'm cheating on myself somehow. Eigentlich ist er nicht neu. Ich habe das Gefühl, ich stecke da fest. Fühlt sich zwar toll an, aber ich habe das Gefühl, ich stecke da fest. Oder andersrum. Fühlt sich fürchterlich an. But then you're usually stuck anyway. All by yourself. To change something. And there are these... What are these strips called? These chemical... Lackmuster. Exactly. Lackmuster paper. That you can keep in your own practice. Diti. Right view. And above all the sensibility. An inner compass. Hilfreich? Heilsam? Oder vielleicht neutral? Oder unheilsam? Und das zweite ist Sati. Sati wird auf Deutsch immer übersetzt als Achtsamkeit.

[31:56]

Da könnte man sehr viel mehr drüber sagen, als das jetzt möglich ist. Aber in diesem Kontext möchte ich Sati als Erinnerung und als How we sometimes separate from the practice is when we think, oh, I always forget that. So I don't practice. Yes, that's true. So then you probably don't really practice. Only what we often forget is that forgetting itself is completely normal. And that part of the practice, this sati, the pillar of memory, in the everyday life.

[32:58]

That we forget is the reason why we practice. It is not the obstacle of practice, but it is the reason why we practice sati. The memory, whatever the practice is, to remember your own intentions again. Und die zweite Ebene von Sati ist, dass man, und da ist wieder der Hintergrund, dass in einem selber etwas ist, eine Ebene, ein Hintergrundgeist ist, der ganz genau weiß, was da gerade los ist. Das ist auch so eine Art innere Aufrichtigkeit. Man weiß, wenn man sich selbst oder andere eigentlich gerade so ein bisschen bescheißt. And also this level is Sati. There is a background noise. I'm telling myself that right now. I know that this is not true. So Diti and Sati. And the third is Vajamo. And Vajamo means right effort or I would maybe say the energy and also the abilities.

[34:08]

in the practice. If my compass needle has broken out, okay, something is not right. I have used my sati and I remember to practice now because the compass has broken out. Then that is not enough alone. Then you really have to apply the energy and also have the skills. um mit dem Phänomen zu arbeiten. Diese drei. Das ist so ein Hintergrundgebäude für die Praxis selbst. Und für den Hintergrund, überhaupt dieses Konzept Vordergrund, Hintergrund, Figur, Grund, I recommend it to those who practice a lot of experience. There are a few differences that you have to work on, otherwise it doesn't work in practice. And the background is one of them. Man kann das auf unterschiedlichen Ebenen, diese Unterscheidung treffen.

[35:25]

Man kann sagen, Inhalte des Geistes und Feld des Geistes. Oder auch in den Koans taucht genau das Gleiche häufig auf als host, host, Gastgeber, und guest, die Inhalte, Gäste. Dieses eine Teaching, diese eine Lehre ist auch in Suzuki Roshi's wichtigste Anweisung. Vielleicht lade deine Gedanken nicht zum Tee ein. Es ist absolut die Gast- und Gastgeberpraxis enthalten. Very briefly, you can start with the feeling of really deepening. That can be a very long process. I'm still doing that now, after 20 years. That the differentiation, as well as still clearer contours in the experience. And at first I didn't even realize it. For years I didn't really know what the field of the spirit was supposed to be.

[36:27]

That's nothing trivial, I think. But when you start to distinguish it, it's like often, that's why we sometimes scold the practitioners, it's so drudgery and mechanical, it's sometimes really, you can start very simply in the fields of perception. I can simply, in seeing it's almost the easiest, I can see a figure, an object of seeing, focus and then look how do I actually do that when I let go of the focus and then perceive the whole field, the whole field of vision. And then focus again and let go of the focus. In the eyes we can normally do that, even if we have to concentrate a bit first.

[37:28]

Focus, let go of the focus. So, in principle, the soft look would be the look for the field and the focus and the soft look. And to really get a feeling for that, how do I do that with the attention, to catch something with the attention and then to release the attention from it and to let go of the object as in the background. If you take that from the attention, and search, then you can quickly do it with thoughts. Capture a thought with attention and then let go of the attention of the thought. Give the thought back into the field. Yes, so that's a little bit of what I wanted to say. If we emphasize the word background now, then I wanted to add a little bit of substance. How do you work at all to cultivate this differentiation?

[38:31]

Because in Zen we cultivate differentiation, that's why we do it. Yes. Yes. I think that's enough for today. I haven't even started the most important thing yet. But, yeah, let's see what happens tomorrow. Yeah, it can be a bit, if we leave it to ourselves, that Kokoro To be ready to be open at all, to grasp the world in the flow, in the change, to grasp the change and then to let go again.

[39:35]

But also ourselves. And that's just a question, of course, both are true. It's a question of emphasis in the experience. Of course I can fixate my experience. Of course, I can also let it go. And that's also a bit of a decision that you make. But in the Zen practice school, we made the decision that something essential happens when we become human beings die bereit sind, immer wieder loszulassen und nicht zu wissen, was dann kommt, die aber tief verwurzelt sind in ihrem eigenen tiefsten Inneren Anliegen und für einige von uns in den Gelöbnissen, die wir empfangen haben.

[40:47]

Wir sind in unseren Intentionen verankert, in the midst of a flowing world. Thank you.

[40:55]

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