Good morning. From Bali, hi. Berlin, Hamburg. Where is Hamburg? Hamburg I saw this morning. There is Hamburg, exactly. Leipzig. Yes, hi. I just received an email from Ottmar, who, as you can see, unfortunately does not participate in the session. He is still not doing well. We hope that it is really just a flu. Someone informed you that he is with Peter now. He actually wanted to sit with us. From how it has developed, it's probably just a virus story, but it has now somehow developed worse with him than with us others.

[01:05]

But at the moment he still keeps it completely normal and goes into emergency. If it stays like this for another two days, then he goes to Freiburg and gets thoroughly examined. And Baker Roshi will come tomorrow, I hope. Yes, okay. Many of you may know that this is my first Sashin that I'm leading. I think it's roughly the 75th Sashin that I do, but the first one that I lead. And I thought about it differently. How would I describe what a Sashin is? As a preliminary definition, I would say, Sashin can be studying reality with vitality.

[02:26]

Studying reality with my vitality. And I study, or vitality studies reality With the body. And with the spirit. And at least for these five days, with the whole life. Now you can see that there are no extraordinary ingredients in it. In theory, vitality is always there. In theory, reality is also always there. And yet I can at least say for myself that I'm not always in a mode that I would describe as living, studying, reality.

[03:34]

And maybe it needs a setting, like the Tashin can be, and also a... You're looking as if I have to speak louder, is that true? Yes, okay. Maybe it needs a setting, and a setting with others, where a few layers... in which life is not necessarily alive, or what I call myself, is perhaps not primarily noticed in its vitality. There are layers over it. And the world is not always reality. There needs to be a setting, perhaps, with others, in which a few layers are penetrated. The Tibetan word for meditation is translated as much as getting familiar with.

[04:56]

Just getting familiar with. I think that's pretty nice. What does that mean to... über die Meditation etwas zu untersuchen oder zu erkennen. Ich werde vertraut damit. Und das ist ein Prozess, der sich ereignet. Das ist nicht etwas, was ich tue, sondern das geschieht über die Zeit. The trust that then arises, if you translate it, when do we use the word normally? Well, you are trusted with another person, for example. And that goes over time. And you can't accelerate that, to be trusted. That has its own time, its own ripening time. And what then arises in this trustworthiness is often so that I could never have imagined it.

[05:59]

And maybe we can take this with us in our understanding of, when we sit here so much in meditation, that it is this kind of mode of realization, that of being trusted. And here, of course, we are in the very first line, we sit with and in ourselves. With others, but probably for most of us, what stands out the most, shows itself, in this pretty, what is it called in German, sensory deprivation, when there are so few sensory stimuli, in this attractive environment, the attractive environment of the Sashin, there is of course also the opportunity that all the things that otherwise perhaps

[07:10]

under the stimuli that are loud and big, whether it's mental stimuli, mental things, emotional relationships, or the loud world sometimes, for everyone who comes from the city. After my very first period of practice, which was quite a culture shock for me in Crestone, Right after that I landed in Paris and met someone there. I was in Paris for a week and that's when I found out what sensory overload means. Since then I didn't know that this was happening, but I was really right. I think you might want to diagnose it as a hearing loss. That was very stressful. So, in other words, there is usually so much information that flows into us. And here now it is less.

[08:17]

And then maybe the information can In the practice period, we talked about the karmic text, the text of our own history, of which some lines of this text or some words are perhaps like fat printed and quite large. And others we have not even known that they are in there, but they are still in there. And then there is also the paper on which the text is written. And then there's the whole book in which it's written. And there's all this, this karmic text, this text of my own story, where in such a tempting environment maybe, yes, really completely different aspects than those that we already know appear. Yes, and then it's about becoming familiar with it. This process of being trusted.

[09:29]

I don't know how it goes with you. I work with it a lot and it's also a process of fluidity for me. Fluidity. What do I mean by that? It's about being trusted with what shows up in me. I notice that it flows away. It loses its very clear contours, which come from, that's how it is. Yes, maybe Marc... Yes, if I now... If I now... Yesterday, for example, it was like that, or... Excuse me, that I was too late, by the way. Yesterday I participated in a congress at the university in Frankfurt. And there it was, for example, I sat in this lecture hall on a bench and I didn't know anyone there and I don't like to speak in front of people I don't know.

[10:34]

And then I got more and more nervous. Then I sat there and this strong wave of emotion appeared. I didn't have any specific thoughts about it, but just an intense, physical feeling that gripped me inside. It pulled my chest together and then I noticed that my hands were getting sweaty. And... then with this feeling, for example, I just let it appear in me. And that alone is what I want to articulate. Here, right at the beginning of the Sashin, I think for meditators, a very important articulation, that there is Ich kann entweder mich identifizieren, kann sagen, ich bin jetzt nervös.

[11:44]

Ich, Nervosität. Oder ich kann machen, oh, in mir taucht Nervosität auf. Dann ist die Nervosität das Phänomen, das in diesem Fall jetzt sogar wirklich die Physiologie des Körpers erreicht und durchdringt. But I can, of course, that's the classic meditation instruction everywhere. I am the room in which it appears. Yes, and then I just did it that way at the moment. I didn't say, this has to go now, but just, okay, then I'll let the room in which it appears now just be familiar with it. Das ist jetzt da, der Raum ist auch da, dann schauen wir doch mal. Mehr mache ich da gar nicht, einfach nur schauen wir doch mal. Jetzt lernen die beiden sich kennen.

[12:46]

Yes, and what actually happens to me is a process of liquidation. Not that it goes away or something, but it's as if it suddenly loses its sharp edges. Is it then necessarily nervousness or is it just energy? Energy that is a little different in the hands than in the chest, which is a little different in the hip, in the feet, for example, is not at all. And I also took away the name. Then you don't have to be nervous. Simply allowed this process of liquidation. And look there, through the process of liquidation, something like an intensity remains in the experience. It's just intense. It's just an intense experience. And that is vitality.

[13:58]

That is vitality. From there on, I can take a look, I think with all, especially with intense emotions, you can take this path again and again and then bring it into contact with reality. Ich mache das Ganze, ich habe angefangen, mit erstmal einfach den Stuhl unter mir. Ah ja, der ist echt, der Stuhl. Da sind die Leute, auch echt. Der Punkt dabei ist, dass dann ein Kontakt entsteht, der nicht in meinem vorgedruckten karmischen Text, nicht in meinem persönlichen Narrativ stattfindet. Das ist dann ein Kontakt, für den ich noch kein Skript habe. Und das Sashin zu nutzen für eine neue Art von Kontakt, für den ich noch kein Skript habe, ich weiß noch nicht, was aus diesem Kontakt wird.

[15:12]

Da kann vieles draus werden. I imagine this kind of openness as an entry point for the kind of contact that we might be able to use for such a session. Contact with a fluid life out of the living. Touching reality. Studying reality. Being trusted with reality. Yes, when I talk about fluidity, I have this feeling that something is fluid. Maybe some of you know that Japan is often called the flowing world. It's a metaphor for... I think what is meant by that is a certain basic mood in culture.

[16:14]

For those of us who were there just now, you two were there too, I don't know if you could see it. This feeling of... A flowing world. A flowing world. And it's not by chance that Dharma practice needs, Dharma practice needs, that's something that Beke Roshi in the last, maybe in the last six months or so, quite clearly articulated. Dharma practice needs can't be found in every body-spirit understanding. That's really just a statement. That means it needs a certain body-spirit understanding, a certain body-spirit practice. And Dharma, so that Dharma can unfold at all. And it's no coincidence that now all social developments in Asia have been left out.

[17:22]

That's something different. That's a different topic. This certain basic mood that exists in Japanese culture and which is often described with a flowing world. This basic mood, that's no coincidence. that it is suitable for the Dhamma practice. Because the Dhamma practice has brought about this basic mood. It is not, oh, in the basic mood the Dhamma practice was created. The Dhamma practice has brought about this basic mood. It's kind of like, I don't know if any of you have read these long Marcel Proust novels. I love them. At one point he says something that really woke me up. He says, he talks about this fugue that Swan loves so much, this very specific fugue. And he says... Die Fuge wurde in der Zeit, als sie geschrieben wurde, wurde sie gar nicht viel gehört, hatte kein Renommee.

[18:32]

Und aber später dann schon. Und dann sagt Proust mit seiner Scharfsinnigkeit, sagt er, man kann nicht sagen, dass die Fuge, wenn sie nicht geschrieben worden wäre, then it wouldn't be the case that in 200 years the hearing would be there for them. The fugue itself has produced the hearing that it can hear. The fugue was a new development in music. And the sensitivity that you need to hear it, has produced the music itself. Do you see the difference? It's big. It's not that time goes on and goes on independently of what happens to it. But what happens in time brings forth the next moment. And so are we.

[19:36]

Our activity in this moment, now, brings forth the next moment. Our life doesn't go on anyway. And it's not even like, oh, I, uh, when you say you change the course of history. But then there's the feeling that the story is just running anyway. And as if I could change that. But that's not the case. But the story is now taking place. And I'm taking part in it. I want to create a feeling for a certain kind of fundamental, where it's about, what is our life? Our life is really broken down from the personal content, where everyone has their own personal encounters with themselves.

[20:37]

But broken down, our life plays in space and time. We are travelers. in the middle of space and time. And that's really the approach, maybe parallel to the discussion with our concrete personal topics, to look at what will come of the personal topics when I change the medium in which they arise. Und das ist auch Dharma-Praxis. Ich das Medium verändere, in dem sie auftauchen. Ja, und da ist einmal, wie ich sage, sich da wirklich hinein zu, über Gewahrsein, sich hinein zu erinnern fast, dass ich bin Zeit. Ich bin Zeit und je vollständiger ich Zeit sein kann, als Zeit ankommen kann, desto vollständiger kann ich teilnehmen an der Gestaltung der Zeit, desto vollständiger kann ich das, was ich den Fortlauf meines Lebens nenne, mitgestalten.

[21:57]

The second is, when we look, what is space? A few of you may know the story of Roshi Kleenex. Do you know them all? Of course not. A few of you don't know the story of Roshi Kleenex. He snores a lot. That was two years ago when we were in Japan. He walked down the street and then a gust of wind came and blew his Kleenex away. And the Kleenex was blowing down the street. And it was a business, so there was a lot going on on the street. There were cars and bourgeoisie and cyclists and so on. The Kleenex was blowing down the street. And then a family came, a Japanese family, parents, two children, came with bicycles behind him, saw that the Kleenex was blowing away and started chasing the Kleenex.

[23:07]

Then someone came from the front and saw that the Kleenex was on its way and started chasing the Kleenex. And there was someone standing in the store entrance and saw, now something is happening here with the Kleenex and also started chasing the Kleenex. And at some point one of the children started Kleenex and brought it back to him. Roshi was standing there with his Kleenex and said, This would not have happened in New York City. No, it wouldn't have happened. But why not? And what I found so exciting about it is that it takes it seriously. Because it wasn't... Das war für die Teilnehmenden in der Situation völlig selbstverständlich. Da ist jetzt ein Kleenex unterwegs, das muss jetzt gefangen werden. Warum wäre das nicht in New York City passiert? Naja, vielleicht.

[24:10]

Wenn wir uns da mal hineinspüren, wie ist die... Wie ist die Präsenz in der Situation, wenn ich auf dem Fahrrad sitze? So jetzt als japanische Mutter, sag ich mal, sitze auf dem Fahrrad und sehe das Kliniks. Das passiert ja in meinem Sinneshorizont. Ich sehe das ja. And maybe there is a basic feeling that makes the world a flowing world. That everything that happens in the horizon of the mind is an expanded body field, an expanded body space. I see that. Is that really outside? It happens in the horizon of the mind. And this expanded body space, there are so overlapping, then there are other people too, and they see that too, the expanded body spaces overlap. And then there is such a Kleenex, that was not even a golden case or something, it was just a Kleenex, it was not about that what was lost was valuable.

[25:20]

It was just something that created a reference point in the middle of a common space. That's how I would interpret it. Because otherwise I can't explain it to myself. A common reference point. Yes, we've all seen it. Then you have to do something about it now. And this common reference point, from which a spontaneous activity arises in this case, without a script. Very spontaneously. Oh, now it's this. And then we react to it. And then the activity of the space is what happens. Yes, maybe we can also take a little bit of that into our sensitivity. Such an expanded body space, the sense fields. as an expanded body space. But then again, now the contrast to the script is not unimportant, because what is spontaneously in the expanded body space in contact

[26:49]

with others, with the world and with other people, with other beings, spontaneously arises. Of course, this is immediately exposed when I have a plan. No, I have to go over to Johanneshof now. I don't have time to chase Kleenex now. The more I am fixed on my agenda, on my script, the less spontaneous things can arise in the common space. But the space in which Dhamma practice unfolds is this one here. The one that, I think, arises alive and spontaneous in each other. We have this more often, especially in living together, I find it always exciting. We live together. Even in the practice period, we have completely new, expanded body spaces that overlap and also have to get to know each other first, have to get along with each other first.

[28:02]

I understand it so that we can see, we have a choice. Wir können schauen, es gibt bestimmte Dinge, die dann spontan entstehen in Gruppen, die Verbindungen stiften. Ein gemeinsamer Witz zum Beispiel. Passiert irgendwas und man fühlt sich verbunden darüber, dass das passiert. Manchmal auch etwas, was traurig macht. Last year, I don't want to mention it again, but it did a lot when Ortmer had the epileptic seizure about a year ago. It also did a lot with the group. You have a choice. You can connect with what connects.

[29:04]

Und manchmal passt das zu dem, was man selber eh auch grad mag. Findet man den Witz lustig. Oder man kann sich da rausnehmen und verbinden mit seinen eigenen Ideen davon, wie es sein sollte. And I think in Sangha development, and we are in a time when Sangha development is even more important. There are always times when something is forming. That's what we had when Roshi started to come to Germany and then we found the Johanneshof. Then something forms. And then at some point it becomes stable normally, in normal processes it becomes stable at some point. And those are different times. Other times. And now we're in a phase with Roshi from last year. He should do this session, he actually knows. Oh yeah, he's 83, he doesn't do it. Then we're in a phase where something changes again and has to find itself again.

[30:14]

And I think especially in these phases it's important as a sangha to see what connects us. How do we find ourselves in a new situation, in a new connection again? And of course, to balance that with what is my understanding, what do I think is right and important in the way that new situations form. And there, I think, really, how should I say this, in this process, living and with a clarity about the dynamics of reality. And maybe really less. I'm not saying that because I think it's negative, not at all, but simply because I pay close attention to my own process.

[31:16]

What bothers me In creative or new connection processes, it's when old scripts, also from preferences and deviations, it was always like that and I prefer it that way, when old scripts get too much power beyond living. In my own life and I think in life together as well. Man hat eine Wahl, ob man studiert, was verbindet gerade. Und sich damit zu verbinden. Oder sich damit zu verbinden, was ist mir wichtig. Das sind gute Wahlen, solange man sie, glaube ich, solange man sie intentional trifft. In Mr. Shin, we look at what... When we get familiar with our own experiences, then sometimes it's like, what can I really build on?

[32:31]

What can I really rely on? And we see in the Zen practice that we come into a mode in which we notice things by recognizing them. One might say, for all those who are very familiar with the distinction between consciousness and consciousness, to notice something recognisable. It's just like when you look into the eyes, you can notice with all senses, also with the inner, with the body, with all senses. Something appears, I look at the candle, and the moment in which the attention is receptive to what appears,

[33:40]

Also for the inner. First of all, that the attention is accessible. And then there can be a moment, if you look closely, where it is as if the attention almost snaps in for such a small moment. Ah, like this. And then it is recognized. Oh, like this. Also something inner, a picture, even a thought. It's as if you think it right then. As if you feel it right then. And if this recognition, to linger in this recognition, to linger in this kind of recognition, and then, as Roshi always teaches, without thinking about it, from this recognition, not the normal way, that happens now habitually, out of habit, ah yes, and then I start to think about it. If we can learn, Not to feel it in your thoughts, but really just, oh, so.

[34:45]

Oh, so is also a form of knowledge. Even if I can't name it. Oh, so is also a form. Oh, so. That's enough. Then I already knew. And in this form, with this form of knowledge, with this modality of knowledge, to be trusted. That's what I suggest as the way we study reality with vitality. And then there is also for this area, also for this modality of recognizing and of knowing so, there is also, also for this area, there is the non-knowing. There is, there is knowledge, oh, oh, something is appearing, oh, and around it, ist so vieles, was ich nicht weiß. Unser Zen ist ein Raum, in dem wir uns öffnen können in die Klarheit des Erkennens und in die Offenheit des Nichtwissens.

[36:01]

Und es kann beides gleichzeitig da sein. Okay. Thank you very much. I wish you a good Sashin. See you later.

[36:18]

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