Oh, more tea. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Well, we did it again. Another day of practicing here together, a day that starts out with blessed rain and then we got some rest and some sunshine and we took care of the temple very nicely. Thank you. We chanted this vow which is written by somebody who is called Zen Master Tode and he says when I, a student of the Dharma, look upon the real form of the universe. So I guess maybe he could look on the real form of the universe, this Zen teacher.

[01:32]

When he looks in this way, on the real form, he sees that all is the never failing manifestation of the mysterious truth of the Tathagata. He didn't quite say that all is the manifestation of the Tathagata, but all is the truth of the Tathagata. So everything is, the real form is the truth. And then he said something about that the other beings who have seen this truth, it makes them be worshipful of all life and to extend compassion to all beings when they have this truth. And I think some of you, I see some of you extending merciful compassion to beings. I see you practicing the way the enlightened ancestors would act based on seeing the real

[02:44]

form of the universe. At the same time, when listening to this vow, at some point you might say this is difficult to understand how somebody could have a vow like this, but again, I would say, well let's just chant it over and over until we understand it. Let's listen to it, and listen to it until we hear the true Dharma. Is there anything you'd like to bring up? Anything you'd like to bring forth? Yes, Kriya? This morning's lecture, you spoke of the world that we see, and it's easy to see unkindness,

[03:47]

but then what I heard you say was that there's this alternate world where kindness is the status quo. Can you repeat what you said, or what you meant to say about that? The world that appears is our mind, and in the world of our consciousness, I should say, in that world we often see cruelty. But life is, what did I say, our mind is not just our consciousness. We have a cognitive life and a physical life, which is far more complex and rich, our life

[04:49]

is actually far more complex and rich than it appears in our consciousness. And in that realm, there's no self, and there's no other, and there's no cruelty. However, there is the results of past cruelty in that world, but there's no active cruelty in the world of our unconscious cognitive processes. But again, there's the results of past appearances of cruelty and past unskillful responses to the appearance of cruelty, which sponsors more consciousness where there's the appearance of cruelty. And then sometimes when cruelty appears, if we don't meet it with compassion, that has consequences in our body and our greater cognitive processes, which again sponsor more conscious life where there's appearance of cruelty and perhaps more unskillfulness.

[05:54]

But our actual life is not the way it appears in our consciousness. Our actual life doesn't have actual rigid boundaries between our life and other people's lives. And our life is actually something we're sharing with all beings, and they're equally sharing with us. However, in our life we still have some unresolved consequences of past unenlightened conscious activity. But still, there's no war between us unconsciously. We're actually working together. And if we practice with our conscious life where cruelty appears, according to the teachings, we will become free of believing that these appearances in our consciousness are something

[07:02]

other than appearances. And then by being free of that we will realize it's not exactly an alternative world, it's more the fuller version of our life. It's not really an alternative because it includes our small life. Our small life is sponsored by our greater life. Our greater life is not separate or alternative to our limited conscious life. And as we become free of our conscious life, that also transforms our non-conscious cognitive process, and it also transforms our body, and it transforms other people's bodies and other people's unconscious process.

[08:02]

It transforms the world, and the way it does that is not available to consciousness. But those who become free of consciousness realize the way of transformation of not just the consciousness, but the entire unlimited life that we share. But it's not exactly an alternative. It's the realm where together with conscious life we can create more and more compassion, more and more freedom, more and more courage to face cruelty in a just way, in a generous way, in a patient way, and in a wise way. I'm sorry if that answer was a little too long.

[09:03]

Do you have any more questions about that? Do you feel pretty certain about everything that you just said? At this moment, I am wholeheartedly committed to the practice, the conscious practice, which I recently understood a new term called praxis. Praxis. I think it's P-R-A-X-I-S. Praxis is a practice which is in line with a theory. So I'm committed to a practice which is in line with the theory that we are all inseparable

[10:15]

from each other, that we are all supporting each other, and that we are all practicing together. I am committed to practice according to that theory. So, for example, I am committed to practice with you and Meg and Charlie, without any exception. I'm committed to that. Now, if I had more faith in it, perhaps I would never, ever get distracted. And I would never think, oh, they're getting so difficult, I'm thinking maybe I won't practice with them anymore. I'm going to exclude them from the list of people I'm practicing with because they're so difficult. But I almost never do actually come out and say that in my mind. I more say, this is getting hard, but I know I've got to work it out with everybody.

[11:17]

It's just really hard now, and I'm tempted to wish I didn't have to work it out with somebody. So, I don't know about cert, but mature faith, maturity in Buddha's wisdom, I'm not exactly saying that I have maturity in Buddha's wisdom, so that I'm never shaken in the commitment to become intimate with fear. To become intimate with the stress of the appearance that somebody is separate from me. But I have no intellectual reservations about that. I just have, I think, the results of times when I really did believe that people were separate from me, and I really thought, and I didn't understand that I needed to practice

[12:19]

it with everybody, and I acted in ways at that time which are causing me to sometimes be a little shaky in the way I'm practicing these principles. Okay? Does that make sense? Yes? This morning, I think I heard you say that sometimes if you offer less, it's easier to receive. Yeah. And that was a strong report for me because I really love to be clear and thorough when I'm communicating, and that seems to be at odds with saying less, so I wonder if you have any other thoughts on that, or suggestions for how to do that? Yeah, well, that's one example. You might offer something, and you might feel like you weren't very clear, or you weren't well understood, but what you were offered might have been accepted.

[13:23]

You know, the person might have accepted it before they understood what you meant. And you notice they don't understand what you meant, and you might actually sense that if they understood what you meant, they would reject it. And so maybe you stop there. Or maybe you offer more and then you notice they don't want it, they don't want to be clearer about the implications of what you said, that they didn't understand, and you sensed they didn't, and then you thought, well, I'll give them a little bit more, I'll tell them a little bit more. And you notice they don't want to know more, they don't want to know the meaning of what you said as it starts to ramify out. Like, homas say, well, then we wouldn't be able to have anything. Buddhas get to be Buddhas, they just don't get to have being Buddha. But also, you can give people a little responsibility.

[14:30]

I'm thinking of like, people maybe say, I take refuge in Buddha, I take refuge in Dharma, I take refuge in Sangha. So a lot of people are willing to say that. But then if you get into, I vow to practice the precept of not killing. That's giving them more. And then some people say, I'm not ready for that one yet. Or, I vow to practice the precept of not selling intoxicants to other people. Some people say, well, I don't know about that. But you're giving them more. And as you give them more, they're not so sure. Or if you get more specific, get into the details of going for refuge in Buddha, they say, I'll just stick with Buddha for now and maybe later I'll get into this other stuff. But not now. So you're getting more clear. So some people might not understand that going for refuge in Buddha would include that you wouldn't look down on anybody.

[15:38]

That taking refuge in Buddha would include that you don't think Buddha is better than somebody. That non-Buddhists are not lesser value than Buddhists. You might not notice that. If you think about it, yeah, Buddha probably doesn't look down on people. But some people might not actually... If they knew that, they might say, well, I'm not going to take refuge in Buddha if I don't get to look down on people who aren't as good as me. If that's what it means, I'm not ready for it. Because how can I not look down on people who aren't as good as me? How can I not think that people aren't as good as me? I'm not ready until I give that up. And then somebody says, well, that's part of taking refuge in Buddha. Well, then maybe I don't want to take refuge in Buddha. But before you told them that that was involved, another one is don't be possessive of anything. Well, some people say, yeah, that makes sense that Buddha wouldn't be possessive of anything.

[16:44]

But when I said I'd take refuge, that felt good. But when I found out that that went with the precept of not being possessive of anything, then I wasn't so sure about I want that part. I heard this another example of there was a tunnel built under a mountain in Vermont in the 19th century, which allowed the people on one side of the mountain to do business with the people on the other side of the mountain. And it fostered tremendous growth in industrial activity in that part of the country, between like maybe upper New York and Massachusetts. Vermont was kind of getting in the way or something. So they made this tunnel. But when they talked about making the tunnel, they said it would cost like a million dollars or whatever. That cost like a hundred million dollars or something. And if people had known beforehand, they would not have built a tunnel. So part of what is often involved in getting people to starting great projects is underestimating the cost.

[17:49]

Of the project. They say, oh, that's not bad. I did not expect this advice. So there's something to that about I take refuge in Buddha. That sounds fine. And then you find out, well, it would cost... How much does that cost? All you got to do is say it. Then you find out. And then there's these other things. Oh, wait a minute. But you already said it. It's too late. But it's not too late to shrink back from the implications you hear about later. You can still resist. Another image I got was given to me at dinner at Green Gulch the other day. It was something about... I was talking to somebody and they were talking about how they've fallen in the quicksand of Zen training. They fall in the quicksand of Zen training. And I thought, oh, that's interesting.

[18:51]

Because quicksand, if you fall in and you don't move, you stay on the surface. But if you resist it, you start sinking deeper and deeper. And almost everybody resists Zen training. So once they fall into it and they start resisting, they just get deeper and deeper into it. If you couldn't resist it at all, you could just stay up on the surface of it where it looks really cute. You know? The Tommy Mats. Nice black robes. Tea gardens. It's so nice. Sitting quietly, harmoniously with your friends. Maples turning red. It's lovely. So if you just stop there, you'll be fine. But if you resist, which most people will if they stay long enough, then you get deeper and deeper and deeper.

[19:53]

And then you start having people who are sworn enemies coming at you. And then you're supposed to extend compassion to them. And if you resist it, you sink deeper into the practice. Until finally it swallows you up. Ashley looks really stressed. Are you scared? What's happening? I don't know. You don't know? I don't know either, that's why I asked you. It sounds a little dishonest. Huh? It sounds a little dishonest to underestimate the project that you're inviting people to embark on. Oh yeah, it does. I didn't say we're doing that. But maybe we should say, which we don't. Maybe we should say, at the Upside Zen Center, maybe we should say.

[20:55]

This is a dangerous path. When you enter this path, you're going to be swallowed up. And converted into wisdom and compassion. And there'll be nothing left of you but light and love. Maybe we should tell people that. And if I tell people that, I will probably be silenced. But, I can tell you, that's what this place is for. This place is a place that's a dangerous practice. That if you practice it more and more deeply, there will be nothing left of your consciousness. Your consciousness will be completely converted into wisdom and compassion. However, it doesn't mean there's no consciousness, it's just you've given yours away and donated it to wisdom and compassion. There's still a lot of other people who have consciousnesses, and your wisdom and compassion will reach out and touch them.

[21:58]

Each one of them, every moment, without exception. Your wisdom and compassion will be in touch. You as wisdom and compassion will be in touch with all beings and practice with them. That's Buddha. So you'll just be converted from being an individual person with an individual consciousness into the salvation of all beings. So that's a dangerous path. So I just tell you that before, and we'll see if anybody comes next month. This happens like after the 15th of the month? Or before? I don't talk about before. Right now anyway, I just want to talk about after. The dangerous path starts now, and now is after the 15th. But, every day is a good day! It's just that there are dangers.

[23:00]

The danger is you're going to lose your greed, hate and delusion. You're going to completely lose it. And you won't be able to have any greed, hate and delusion anymore. However, other people might have greed, hate and delusion, and you can be kind to that. Your wisdom and compassion can be kind to it. So I'm not advertising that this is a safe path, that you have nothing to give up. I'm not advertising that. And if I say that at Zen Center, people may say, don't tell them that. Especially our donors, yes? Recently, I'm pretty sure I heard about quicksand, and it's only generally 2 or 3 feet deep. And so there's something kind of interesting that came up when you were talking about resistance. Generally, see? But sometimes it's deeper.

[24:01]

Well, that would be the problem. But still, the thing that came up for me was that the resistance is the quicksand. The path's not dangerous. The resistance is the danger. It's like a feedback loop. And you just get deeper and deeper in this feedback loop. It isn't so much that the resistance is dangerous, but I do agree that resistance is a feedback loop. It is a feedback loop, and the resistance guides you to the middle way where there's no resistance. The dangers are what happens to you when you resist. You can injure yourself if you resist. But the resistance actually is a feedback system. So you resist, you get hurt, and then you learn, Oh, that hurt when I resisted. I'm sorry. You resist the teaching. You resist your non-separation with people.

[25:02]

You resist helping this person. And resist can mean that you try to help them more than they want, or less than they want, or more than they need. That's a kind of resistance. Or less than they need. Or resisting even the self. Resisting the self, and also resisting resistance. But resistance is a normal part of the process of learning how to become one with all beings. The path of becoming one with all beings is through facing the stress of feeling separate. Could you say resistance is necessary for practice? Yeah, I would say it is necessary. But if you don't have your path of no more learning? Well, I don't know about that, because to get to the path of no more learning you had gone through a lot of resistance.

[26:07]

What I'm saying is you don't have any left at that point. If you don't have any left, any resistance left, would that imply you're at the... Oh, you don't have any resistance left. One gets to a point where there's no resistance. But you get to that point by working compassionately with resistance. Because we normally resist. Like my leader, my little leader, she resists a lot of stuff. She has very strong agendas, and she resists different agendas from hers. However, she's not that sick. So she doesn't throw a big tantrum every time an agenda other than hers comes to meet her. She struggles a little bit, but then she adjusts pretty well. But she does resist, and she does have a sense that she knows what's best. And she's trying to control everybody

[27:09]

into their proper position. And she thinks she can. And I kind of go along with it. That's part of the reason why she likes me. Here's an example of somebody I've got control of. She also really loves her mom much more than me, and she doesn't think she's in control of her mom. They've got a more advanced relationship. She accepts not being in control of her mom. But with me, it's just playing in the realm of the illusion of control. And I'm so happy to go along with that. To a certain extent. And then sometimes she rewards me by letting me disagree and not punishing me too much for that. Yes?

[28:13]

So, when you're talking about practice, it seems to me that we're practicing all the time with each other. We're practicing with all beings, and all beings practicing with Buddha. And it's happening all over, everywhere, all the time. And then the resistance comes up sometimes to the practice. For whatever reason. But initially there's no resistance. There's just the practice. There's that kind of pure cognition that occurs. You encounter something or meet somebody and it could be someone with ISIS or the neighbor next door. And there's just that meeting initially. And no story is attached. But then there's that resistance. And then that story begins. And then maybe the learning occurs, but that resistance occurs after the practice has already begun. It's sort of already occurring, right? But hasn't been realized. It's okay. You could say we're already practicing together,

[29:18]

or you could say we're already working in harmony together. But if we don't practice, we won't realize it. Because in some sense, although we're living together in harmony, we sometimes have resistance to the way we're in harmony. Because we don't know how to practice in a way that realizes it, so that we can realize the apparent disharmony is not really a disharmony. And practicing with one another is ever-changing. The way we're actually practicing together, I don't know if it's effortless. I think maybe we're working hard to help each other and we're working hard to accept everybody's help. I think that process is a very vital and effortful situation.

[30:19]

It's just that we have to sort of enact it. We need to sort of perform it in order to realize it. But we're trying to do a performance which realizes reality. And the reality is already such. Thank you very much. Thank you.

[31:00]

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