I don't know how loudly I can speak, so you may have to close the window, but leave them for now. I had two wisdom teeth out recently, and I busted a hole into my sinus cavity when I took out one tooth. Excuse me for explaining. I find it more interesting than you do. But they've made this extra passageway. Also I'm trying to keep it dry so it will heal. And so I'm learning something about breathing actually, because I'm always circulating my breathing through my sinuses more than I would usually. But having an extra passageway is rather a little bit concerning. And I can't speak quite so loud. For those of you who are just here for the lecture, this is the first day of the Sashim.

[01:27]

We have a new, not-yet-completed vendo, which, do we start sitting immediately after? What's that? Do we start sitting immediately after? Ten minutes. If you want an opinion in the vendo. I guess people can't go see the vendo. I was going to suggest you go see the vendo. There will be kinhin going on. It's not quite finished, so people will remember this sashin as the sashin in the half-finished zendo. It's rather wonderful, actually, the new zendo. We should have an opening ceremony for it when it's finished. It gives the building a softer, more complete feel. Usually in saschim, I start out by emphasizing zazen, our physical posture. Can you hear? No? Okay, I'll try. Maybe a better microphone.

[03:06]

I'll stop talking before it gets too long. Usually, in a seshin, I begin by speaking about zazen posture, how we physically sit. And this seshin, Maybe I'll speak about that some, but in this session I want to emphasize conduct, our physical, emotional conduct. Zazen is actually a rather good door for meditative absorption or some deeper awareness. The path to the door is your conduct. It's often a good door because it will give us a

[04:47]

experience of the limitations of our conduct. If you're not eating enough or eating too much, you will tell by your zazen. It may not be so easy to tell just when you're eating, but you can tell in zazen if your stomach is disturbed. And if you're too sleepy in zazen, it means you're not sleeping enough. And if you have various conflicting emotions, you can't sit zazen. Zazen isn't going to force you into awareness. Zazen just allows you to see what's wrong with your life situation. So Zazen, first of all, requires you to reorganize your life, and through your conduct you can

[06:26]

eliminate, reduce conflicting emotions. So sadhana won't let you enter your deep meditation unless your life is in some kind of order. Recently, I've been trying to speak about particular words. For those of you who haven't heard me speak about it, I think it would be rather confusing what I'm trying to say about how particular words represent deities, I can say. But I don't think most of you will understand what I mean. So, how particular words

[07:48]

convey something very deep or complete about our activity. I spoke last time about what and what's what. Dan did a small drawing of a Bodhisattva sitting reading a book called What's What by Buddha. And, but what, the word what has the sense of who and when, a kind of being in it. What is it? It also has wow. That what is it? It is what? That what, that initial looking at something has

[09:12]

almost an open kind of experience. And today I'm speaking about just. Tsukiroshi often said, just do it, or just as it is, or just now. On this moment, just do it. And just, in this sense, what he means is the dharmakāya, maybe the dharmakāya body of Buddha. Just, you know, love.

[10:15]

In Latin, I think it means laws. Can you hear me still? And it may mean, I don't know if there's a connection, but in Greek it may mean a one-seeded wheat. So, just the fruit of one thing. Just one thing at a time, maybe. So, what I'm speaking about, I started talking about some time ago, hope to emphasize in this Sashin, is the Book of Records story number four. And right now, the story about Ryutan and Tokusama. Now, I told you the story before about Ryutan and Tokusama. But for those of you who haven't heard it, I'll tell you again. Tokson was someone who was bringing what he thought were the laws of Buddhism on his back, the Diamond Sutra. He was some famous young expert virtuoso on the Diamond Sutra. So he was carrying the Diamond Sutra.

[11:39]

to the south to straighten out those Zen masters in the south of China who said no transmission through scripture. So he was carrying the Diamond Sutra and he came to moved to southern China and stopped at a tea shop, or a rice shop, where they sold rice cakes or something. And a woman there... There are several stories about women, quite developed women then, teachers maybe, And they, in the stories, they usually have a rice shop or a tea shop. They didn't need a zendo. Some direct opportunity to encounter people. So this woman looked at Toktan and recognized somebody, maybe quite alert.

[12:56]

He said, he'd been obviously walking a long way, and he said, I want something to refresh mind and body, or mind and spirit, or something like that. Actually, I think there's a play on the word light in the Chinese, but I don't know Chinese. So he, she said, what is that you're carrying? rather heavy, I suspect. And he said, it's the Diamond Sutra and commentary. And she said, oh, don't you know in the Diamond Sutra it says, past mind is unattainable, present mind is unattainable, future mind is unattainable. With what mind will my rice cake refresh you? With what mind will my rice cake refresh you? Anyway, Totsan didn't know what to say. So, he was there for encounter, though.

[14:33]

So he said, let me, is there some good Zen teacher around here? And she said, yes, there is. Ryutaro, who lives near. You should go see him. So, he went to see Ryutaro. Rūtāra means something like dragon. Rū is dragon, and tāṁ is love. I can't speak louder. I want you to fall down to the ground. No, no, that's all right. Ryu means dragon and tan means pit or lake, something like that.

[15:55]

When Togsak came to Ryutan Temple, he came in Maybe a rather aggressive person, ready for anything. And he came in. And before he got there, he's already prepared not to meet anybody. So he says, said, I don't see. dragon or a lake. And Rutan was just in hearing. He must have been near. And Rutan said, just now you are in the midst of the dragon lake or the dragon pit. Or he said,

[17:28]

He meant, you are meeting Ryutan now in person. So I have been thinking about this with a tough heart. And what I want you to understand is, what did Ryutan mean? You are meeting Ryuton in person. Why wasn't Tokusan meeting Ryuton in person? Anyway, Tokusan didn't know what was going on, actually, so he stayed with Ryuton. But he was quite alert. person and became one of the most famous Zen masters in China. So I'm speaking about this kind of relationship.

[18:48]

What is the nature of enlightenment? We're talking about more than some experience, satori or kensho. Enlightenment is something that transcends any kind of particular experience. We're talking about some kind of complete communication. And why the meditation school is in both China and Japan and Tibet also a transmission school. Why are meditation and transmission linked? one practice. You must do it yourself, but what can an encounter with a teacher, with any person, a real encounter with anything, how does that turn you around, so you see?

[20:22]

From then on, what happened was what. So Ryutan was presenting himself in this way to Tokugawa, recognizing some alert person. Yesterday, I went and saw a dance recital of Lakshmi, who is Balasara Sati's daughter. And I don't know exactly about their lineage, but for several generations, their family, their lineage has been both blood lineage and teaching lineage. And their family has been the most prominent dancers in India, I think. And when I have watched Balacharastra dance, it's been one of the most extraordinary experiences I've ever had.

[21:48]

not dissimilar to the Siddhiquism for me. I think the mudras, the many mudras that are part of Indian dance, are so much a base too for Hindu-Buddhism. religion. But this is one reason for the power of Baladhar. But the dancing for we who practice, What moved me the most yesterday was before Lakshmi began dancing, she looked across the room at her mother. And in that look, you know, was Yutan. They actually met. They knew each other.

[23:23]

completion. No separation at all in that look. And it was a look that went in all three times, past, present and future. By that look they knew exactly what she was going to do. That kind of look is the essence of transition. I don't mean you should go around staring at each other, you know, hoping for some electric shock, some confluence of what Brett called the eye stream. It can't be thought. And usually what's interesting is it requires some common knowledge, some common experience. Of course, our experience is quite common.

[24:46]

usually two people or some group of people, need some common experience where they know they know everything in common. Before that can be opened up. So the Sangha is a place. Our experience is taking care of Zen centers, taking care of the Zen room. taking care of this altar and this photo hall is this kind of experience. Stella, can you hear me? I said once, I think in the recent wind-bell, which is from a Sashin lecture, I said, Buddhism is one of those guilt-time stances. It gives, actually, whole everything is a time stance, and it's going off in you. But this is past, from one person to another.

[26:28]

And sometimes it takes some opportunity before we are open. It's not just some particular experience I'm talking about. but something in which any experience is so much already past. I don't know if you've noticed, but a number of Buddhist and Sufi groups, and maybe more than that, recently, quite recently, have been interested in theatre, or doing performance, which they identify with the Dharma.

[27:59]

What I would like to try to convey to you is how any act is actually natural, spontaneous, practice and performance all at once. But you may wonder, how can something that's spontaneous also be performance? I don't know exactly how to convey this to you, but... Precepts, our practice of precepts, are our first experience of the Dharmakaya form.

[29:11]

the rules for conduct, that to not know conduct is like having a broken foot, or a blind person does not perceive form, and an unethical person does not see the dharma. This is very physical. This isn't just some kind of literary example, clear example. It means physically. If you are physically tripping around, you can't meet Buddha. To meet Buddha, to meet Zazen, to recognize Yutan, means your conduct has led you to that place. So when we do the ceremony, everyone in the ceremony, the doshi, the leader of the ceremony, and all the people in the ceremony, actually in a situation like this with a figure or Buddha,

[30:29]

have an opportunity to demonstrate, what should I say, space as a being, or positive space. Usually when you walk around, you think there's nothing there, and it's just you clubbing about. Bang, bang, bang, you're walking around. You don't step as if It was something you were... I can't say stepping through, like pudding, but... It's not positive-negative, you know, but positive-positive. some way of stepping, some way of, you know, in a ceremony, you are very aware of the people around you and very careful of their space. So a ceremony, with chanting and walking, allows us to perform something for each other, to communicate something. We can do it anyway, actually. And in them, we, you know,

[32:04]

So there are kinds of theater connected with Zen, and in fact which Buddhists or priests have participated in. But in general, the theater like no theater in Japan, which is very closely related to Zen, is separate. Because performance in Zen is at one with whatever you're doing. So your conduct as your parent, is available to you always, not just in the midst of a ceremony. But we do some ceremony together to try to give each other some awareness, some chance to notice. Now, it's not performance in the usual sense of that word, in that you have a repertoire or vocabulary of ways of expressing something. And on a particular moment, you ransack your repertoire and pick one and say it, or do it.

[33:27]

So it's not performance in that it's doing something you already know how to do. It's doing something... So each moment is absolutely new. and you don't know what you're going to do. But, because your consciousness extends to what you're about to do, it's a communication. It can't be anything else. Even though it's spontaneous, completely new to you, it's a communication, a kind of performance. in which actually there is some play with other people. So let me say something about precepts. Precepts, you know, do not kill, do not take what is not given, etc. Do not commit adultery.

[34:52]

These precepts are extremely interesting and they have many, many ways to be understood. And it's rather difficult to understand their usefulness immediately. But do not kill. I spoke about How Suzuki Roshi described Do Not Kill from his positive side two or three weeks ago, what I'd like to say again. Do not kill, you know, it means many things. But most basically, perhaps, We can say it means you can't kill anything. When you recognize that there's no way to undo anything, something which has happened, something which is interfering with you, something which is disturbing you, something which is in your way, can't be removed. You can't kill it, you can't take it apart, you can't avoid it, you can't go the other direction, actually.

[36:22]

It will always be in front of you, no matter how. You can't smash it. That's true, you should think about that. So when you recognize that you can't kill anything, there's no choice but to meet things, to turn towards them directly, as speaking about the meaning of worship or worth-ship. which means to turn toward just what happens, and the turning toward just what happens is meaning, is value, is transmission, is giving. There's nothing to possess, but we are always giving. Always giving and receiving. Not just everything changing. Everything changing is too philosophical, like truth is too philosophical. We're not talking about truth, we're talking about trust.

[37:46]

We're not talking about change in some scientific abstract. We're talking about giving and receiving. Something that you are actively participating in, not just pushed around by the laws of gravity or some laws of the universe. You yourself are the laws of the universe. The apple doesn't create I mean, the apple isn't following the law of gravity, the apple is creating the law of gravity. So the positive meaning of Do Not Kill is to extend your life to everything. So now I want to speak about how Yuki Roshi described the do-not-commit adultery. A rather interesting way he described it, from this positive point of view. On the one hand, it means, in a simpler way, do-not-commit adultery means that it is the better part of wisdom

[39:13]

to discriminate between actions which entangle you and actions which don't entangle you. So this is conduct, of course. It's rather stupid of you to get involved in situations which cause you pain or other people pain. There's no escaping from that kind of entanglement. There's no zazen possible in that kind of entanglement. So we discriminate. This action is possible, this action is to entangle. This is one meaning of do not commit adultery. But in Buddhism we also say, do not discriminate. So, what shall you do?

[40:15]

You know, we mustn't overlook the power of the scoundrel. Some immoral, how shall I say, scoundrel has a certain power because he doesn't care what he did. Maybe you can interpret, do not kill that way. Oh, in Buddhism you can't kill anything. Okay. You can interpret anything this way. But, assuming you're not scoundrel, this power of not, this power of being able to forget what you've done,

[41:24]

is necessary to forget that you've committed adultery, to be able to meet each thing with no past. So, Buddhism doesn't mean to just be some pious, do-gooding person. We must have the power of the scoundrel, too. which means you've done something, maybe not so good, but you can forget it and start a next moment. If your intention is pure, you can do this. Scoundrel's intention is not pure, so actually he has much difficulty. do not commit adultery in this way, to be able to forget what you just did, to be free from what you just did, whatever it is. Not discriminating, oh, I just did, oh my God, you know. Even if you're into that reflex, you forget it and go on to the next thing.

[42:57]

So this means you're not taking responsibility for what you've done, but you're taking responsibility for what is about to happen. Usually we think of taking responsibility as meaning we'll take responsibility for what we've done. Of course that's true. You must do that to begin to take care of your karma. As long as you are acting in such a way that you accumulate the effects of your actions, you have karma. When you can act in such a way that you forget everything, there is no karma. Something new is possible. You know, I have to talk with you often, and I say something, you know, because I've forgotten what I said. Mostly I've completely forgotten it, so I have to say something new.

[44:26]

But at the same time, if you understand the look of Lakshmi and Balasaheb Bhatti, from just one phrase you can understand everything I say, or will ever say. So one of the wonderful things about Indian dance, as it struck me yesterday, was how that tradition, that practice, brings out so much from the person, awakens one to just what What is included in what and just? So, Suzuki Roshi can say something about adultery in the wink of an eye. And if you know Suzuki Roshi,

[46:08]

That can be a lifetime of revelation. To know exactly what he meant, I can speak about it for the next few weeks or years. You don't need but one lecture from your teacher. Can you? if one is enough. How to penetrate, how to extend your life to Bhutan, how to extend your life to one phrase. Maybe you have to wait for the opportunity, and the opportunity is such a satisfaction if we just work together. and you work with each person you meet, giving and receiving. So we're not talking about taking responsibility just for what you've done, but that

[47:34]

being free of just what you've done, but your consciousness extending to what you're about to do, which you don't know what it is. But you take responsibility for it. Usually we want to wait and take responsibility after the fact. It's too late. Or credit. But before it happens, we don't want to take credit. How to extend into the three times past, present and future? In this way, your activity is past, present and future, and is performance and spontaneous and natural and practical.

[48:36]

Because you are awake, thoroughly, in everything you do. Not just in bothering, but in your conduct. Without that kind of conduct, you wouldn't meet, you wouldn't know Buddha if you met him. You don't recognize your past lives all around you. So in our new zendo, there's a way to enter. A way to step over the threshold board. With your right foot.

[49:55]

If you're on the right and with your left foot, if you're on the left. Probably in that door, we'll have time going all the way through. Probably we will, time has a raised button, but probably we'll enter from the left side. We'll have to see how it feels when we have the time built. And there's a way to move in that space, to recognize that space and each of us in it, until your body knows. So, most of you recognize your body in zazen when it starts to hurt. Until then you are trying to meditate in your mind or your feelings or consciousness or something. So you sit down and you try to compose your mind, mostly, your body to some extent. Mostly you're trying to adjust your feelings. But you should know just your hands

[51:30]

with some composure and delicacy just on the tongue as you get up, and your bottom. Now, Repst has done a wonderful book for us called Sit In. And he says you should sit on your two sit bones. And this is right. Your sit bones should be too Buddhist, very alive. And your consciousness should extend up through there, through your back, shoulders,

[52:32]

top of your head, and your consciousness should be everywhere, touching, lifting, like you were a thousand hands. In this way, your consciousness and feelings and mind will take care of themselves, and you will be completely aware throughout your body long before your knees start to hurt. Come on. What does that mean? So, throughout this session, serving food, walking in the hall, in chashu. When you walk in chashu, you know, we put this arm here and put it here. And if you do this, you know, when you're walking, you can't have... this will make the tied up places in your back hurt.

[53:59]

It's a way to identify where you're tied up. If you walk this way enough, pretty soon your back will start to hurt, but it'll hurt in those places where you're tied up. Because this, if you can do this equally, this is a clear hole, you might say, and all the unclear holes in your body will become aware, awake. And to give some life to it, not just a place. You know? We turn our hand up slightly. Rather, your arms are rather at your side, and your hand is together, and once it's together, then you turn up slightly. Some people actually do this way. But just enough, as our mudra takes some effort, so our consciousness can begin to penetrate. So when you walk in chakras, you just turn it enough so that some effort or some life is in it. Then you'll notice when your hands forget themselves, it will go like this. Eventually, you don't forget yourself, your elbow.

[55:27]

isn't something way down there. So your elbow should do zazen in this session. Don't drag your body along to zazen. But don't also let your body lead you racing ahead. Some presence, some space maybe is our guide in early part of practice. And that space you may discover through our ceremonies. through recognizing each other.

[56:29]

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