Good morning, honored followers of Ben. Yesterday, I gave some word called objectless meditation. Is that what you read? Do you know what that word is? Zazen is a noun. Inside and outside events for us at meditation without an object. Meditation without an object is also sometimes called non-dual meditation. Not really. Meditation without the duality of subject and object. According to Mahayana Buddhist teaching, there are two causes of enlightenment.

[01:17]

One cause is non-dual meditation or objectless meditation. The other cause is what you might call purification and accumulation. Yesterday, I just talked about non-dual meditation. And at the question and answer, one woman said, well, what about when you get angry? I tried to talk to her about, in the midst of anger, taking the backward step. But actually, as I was talking to her, I realized how difficult it is to not have objects when you're angry. It is possible, however, to, I think, sometimes, right in the midst of anger, turn around.

[02:24]

by understanding that this is not an object. Either the anger or the object of the anger is not an object. And you can stop the angers, become free of the anger. However, I think this is only possible when we have quite a bit of stability, too. The non-dual meditation depends on the practice of the, it might be the first five paramitas. And this woman asking about, what about anger? Well, in that case, it's much easier to realize that what's before you is not an object when you're not angry, or put another way, when you practice patience. What I hope and what I believe to some extent is that Zazen, the practice and value, and the way we do our practice here, without saying so, takes care of the first five paramitas.

[03:38]

So if you can do the sixth paramita, the perfection of wisdom, which is not to have any objects before you. For example, during Sashin, we have considerable discomfort, most of us, at various types. And if we can somehow not run away from these discomforts, make ourselves in some sense comfortable or at peace, or settle with the discomforts. This is the practice of patience. If we can settle with our circumstances, it is with our circumstances that we turn around.

[04:42]

Another word, we could just use a sticker, an example of this is your body, and it's in some pain, and you're You're jumping around it. You're not coming down and settling into the body with this discomfort. It's hard to turn around on this body. You have to be in the place you are to turn around on. You can't be over to the side here a little bit and turn around like where you are. You have to come home to turn around. So we need to be settled into the moment-by-moment phenomena of our life in order to not consider that phenomena to be object. To theoretically not consider things to be objects is a theoretical consideration.

[05:42]

But to actually be where you are then, not consider that experience as an object. This is what we're talking about. But in order to be where we are, we need to practice giving. We need to practice careful ethical consideration. We need to practice patience, enthusiasm, and concentration. All those practices are necessary. In order to be at the place and there, take the backward step. or learn the backwards step. Now, during ordinary life, it's quite difficult to be where you are. During the day, various little irritations occur to us. And as I was saying to the woman yesterday, all of us, I think, All of us, some of the time, some of us, some of the time, all of us, some of the time, don't get angry when we're irritated.

[06:51]

Once in a while when we're irritated, almost all of us don't get angry. There's some little irritation that some of us don't get angry at some of the time. I think I never find anybody that gets angry at every irritation. But most of us get angry at some irritation, sometimes trying to avoid our situation. During sashin, the irritation level for most of us builds up. So, it's a kind of, it's a kind of, test or goad, Sashina, the kind of goad to our prad, to our patience practice. It's saying, you had trouble settling with this? Under ordinary circumstances, well, try to settle with this now. You have a little, you're kind of wavering in your patience?

[07:57]

Well, how about now? And then many people during Sashin feel, gee, my patience is not so strong. I have trouble settling with my circumstances. But once in a while, if you sit many, many Sashins, there might be a moment might come someday when you actually just say, okay, I'm going to be here. Okay, let's have it. Give it to me. I want it now. I'm going to take it. And take it. and sit there. Once in a while that happens. Some people even do it the first day. I met somebody one time who said, she decided, she said, well, I thought I might as well just do it the first day rather than the sixth or seventh. So she just decided to go and do this the first day. And she just said, okay, let's have it. And she got. And she sat there. Unfortunately, her sachin was kind of over a day or so later.

[09:02]

She sort of had to hang out with the residents who were still resisting being in the sachin, being in our bodies with all this stuff happening. So in fact, to practice having no objects, you need also to practice patience. You could try to have no objects. But again, if you're not where you are, you're not turning around an actual experiential situation. And therefore, the turning doesn't really work. It's theoretical. It's not real. And therefore, the results will not be real. But if you're actually in your place, especially at a place that you had to really be enthusiastic about being there. I mean, if you're having discomfort, you have to be very enthusiastic to be there. You have to say, boy, I'm really enthusiastic about practicing patience. I really want to sit here with my mind.

[10:03]

I'm really going to give myself to being this person. All that... Enthusiasm, all that forbearance and acceptance, all that giving, all that carefulness, all that concentration coming together to let you be where you are. Then you practice not having objects of thought. And then it works. So basically, I'm going to talk a little bit more about this not having objects of thought. And I leave it to you. to do the very difficult work of sitting in your body and settling onto your body and mind. And also, as I said yesterday to this woman, if you're angry, you sort of have to, in some sense, you have to sort of confess yourself into your place. You have to keep sort of allowing what you're doing and what you have done to get yourself to where you are.

[11:08]

In other words, patience is really not to do anything. I mean, confession or repentance is really not to do anything. But you sort of have to work to get yourself to a place where you're not doing anything. In other words, where you're just where you are. Does that make sense? This is the... I think... I like this understanding of repentance, and I think it's really important. The Sixth Ancestor of Zen said what they said. He said, good friends, what is repentance? Seeking forgiveness is to do nothing throughout your life. Seeking forgiveness is to do nothing throughout your life.

[12:13]

Repentance is to know the mistakes and evil actions you have perpetrated up till now and never let them be apart from the mind. It is useless to make confessions in words before the Buddhas. In my teaching, forever engage in no action. This is repentance. Now, where do I go? I think maybe I'll say a little bit. I'll just give you another quote from the sixth answer. Yes?

[13:17]

I'm sorry. Wait. Whatever it is, keep going. What is it, Nate? Let me. It means to practice the six parametres. Practice no action means practice as such. Practice such that the practice no action. Or it also means giving. Giving is not an action. It is simply to let things be what they are. to let that be . For me to do it and for you to do it are both acts of . But they're not actions. Ethical conduct is simply to primarily, foremost, be faithful to what's happening.

[14:27]

Carefully, minutely be faithful to what is happening. Patience is to accept what's happening, to make yourself big enough to let it happen, to not resist it, to make yourself comfortable with it, and so on. Each of these are simply not doing anything other than being what's happening. So he says, so here's a sixth ancestor definition of zazen, of sitting zen. Basically, the za, the sitting part of sitting zen, means not to have objects out there. Externally, cannot have anything out there. Doesn't mean that everything disappeared. It means that you turn around, that you don't get sucked out into things as objects.

[15:32]

You're not obstructed by object, you're not obstructed by the external world. Internally, the zen part, the da is external, the zen is internal. Internally, you're not confused, and you see what's happening. However, he says in the previous sentence, he said, previous paragraph, he said, Therefore, both viewing mind and viewing purity will cause obstruction to the way." So you don't view things. You have nothing you're viewing. And then he says, and what is Chan meditation? What is Zen meditation? And here you're working in versus it. I thought this should bother us too much. Outwardly, to exclude

[16:34]

Form is chant. Inwardly, to be unconfused, is meditation. Even though there is form on the outside, when internally the nature is not confused, then from the outset you are yourself, pure and of yourself in meditation. The very contact with circumstances causes confusion. The very contact with circumstances causes confusion. Separation from form outside is Chan. Separation from form outside of Chan. Being untouched inside is meditation. Being Zen externally and meditation internally is known as Chan meditation. The Vimalakirti Sutra says, at once, suddenly you regain your original mind.

[17:37]

From the outset, we own nature's cure. So this is the sixth ancestor. And the first ancestor, Bodhidharma said, have enough objects of thought, and your mind is spontaneously calm. If there's circumstances out there that you're contacting, your mind is confused. I'd like to go back to now. And there's a section here which I've always had a little trouble with, and I still do. But I feel I want to share it with you anyway.

[18:41]

OK, so the first paragraph is basically, everything's fine. What's the problem? Then, however, if there's the slightest discrepancy, there's big problems. If there's the slightest duality, between you and Buddha, between subject and object. There's a slightest object up there that pick problems. And then, of course, as soon as there's a slight discrepancy, as soon as there's an object, well then, you could have aversion and attraction. You could make judgments. So as soon as aversion and attraction arise, you lose your mind and it pierces you. Now, this is the part I had trouble with. Even though you may boast of your comprehension and wallow in understanding, having gotten a glimpse of insight, when you find the way and understand your mind, you're inspired with the determination to soar the skies.

[19:56]

Even though you may roam freely within the bounds of initial entry, you are still somewhat lacking in the flight of world emancipation. So he's talking about the situation. He's saying, OK, everything's fine, so why practice? Then he's saying, if there's the slightest discrepancy, there's big problems. If there's the slightest duality, there's going to be you name it. It can get really, really bad just because of this little discrepancy. And then he says, he starts talking about this kind of like One translation says suppose. All of a sudden they say suppose that one gains pride of understanding and inflates one's enlightenment.

[20:58]

That sort of sounds like a hereditary way of putting it. Inflates and pride. But other translations don't make it sound so bad. They make it sound pretty good. In other words, they're saying, not only saying, there's a question about why you should practice, but there's a very dangerous situation you have to then dwell. And then they start saying, well, suppose you have a pretty good understanding. Suppose you actually have some real kind of football. So here's another translation. Though you are proud of your understanding and replete, replete means you have a lot. replete with insight, getting hold of the wisdom that knows at a glance. Suppose you do that. Though you attain the way and clarify the mind and giving rise to a spirit that assaults the very heavens, you have gained the precincts of the entrance and are still missing the path of liberation.

[22:06]

And this is how Bhagavan Veni said it first, in the early version of the Bhaktivedanta Veni. Then later he said, though you are proud of your understanding and replete with insight, getting hold of wisdom and knows of the glimpses, though you attain the way and clarify the mind, giving rise to a spirit that assaults the heavens, you may loiter. You know what loiter means? You may loiter in the precincts of the entrance. and still lacks something of the vital way of the path of liberation. Now, one of the reasons why I had trouble with this was because in the various translations that I read over the years, I couldn't tell whether they were saying, well, you gained something kind of not very good. and then you're somewhat lacking. It doesn't say you gain something not very good and you're totally off the mark. It says somewhat lacking.

[23:10]

It says you really have something, but you're lacking a little bit, but you're lacking just something. And I think that they're actually saying that this is a case, they're saying suppose You actually have gotten to the place where you're hanging around an entrance to the path. You actually got some real wisdom. You're somewhat lucky. You're not that bad, actually. But something is lacking. And what is it that's lacking? Well, it's easy if you just look at the next line. But can you remember, I guess, what comes right after that? He's saying the slightest discrepancy. And now suppose you were pretty good. Suppose you had some wimp in them. You're right around the neighborhood of the entrance to the way.

[24:15]

And you're kind of loitering there. That's a hint. You're loitering. So what's missing? What's missing in this loitering, insightful person? Stepping forward? Or stepping backward? And what do we call, what is the stepping forward and the stepping backward called? Huh? It's called carrying right thought. It's called . In other words, he says, don't just hang around a big gate. You should start practicing. See, first he said, why should you practice? The way is totally pervasive and perfect and complete. Why should you practice? And then he says, there's a slight discrepancy. There's any dualism, you're done for. And then he says, for some reason he says, suppose you have some insight and you're right at the gate to the way. Now one way to read this today is suppose you're right at the gate right now.

[25:19]

Suppose you're very close. Suppose you've been loitering around the gate to Buddhism for quite a while. Some of you have been practicing for quite a while. Suppose you've been loitering with some insight for quite a while, and there's still maybe the slightest discrepancy. There's something lacking in the vital road. It's a little thing, actually, and it's a big thing. It's called the practice. And then he says, Even Shakyamuni Buddha, who, he was born in this lifetime with innate knowledge. He was an exceptional person who was the result of a very, very long and excellent evolution. So he was born with innate knowledge. And yet he practiced sitting upright for six years. And Bodhidharma,

[26:22]

In transmitting the mindset, he also sat facing a wall for nine years. So if they did it, what about us? How can we not do it? Bodhidharma, facing the wall for nine years, People either saw him or heard about him, and they thought he was practicing Dhyan concentration. And they named his school the Dhyan School, the Zen School, the Chan School, the San School, the Zen School. They named it after what they thought he was doing. But he wasn't practicing Dhyana in the usual sense.

[27:29]

What was he doing? He was practicing objectless meditation. He was taking a backward step. He was turning the light around. And he was turning the light around. Where was he turning the light around? Where was he turning around? What? Right where he was. He was in northern China in a place called Shaolin. Shaolin means little forest or little woods. There he was sitting in a little forest temple in his body with his problems. And he was turning around on his problems. being who he was. This is not, of course he was concentrated, but this is not the practice of what we call concentrating itself, although there must be concentration.

[28:39]

And concentration is the last thing that's necessary before you turn around. In other words, giving, ethical conduct, patience, enthusiasm, and being there. But you have to have enthusiasm to be there. It tells, in fact, everybody is enthusiastic with where they are. You try to move somebody from where they are, you'll see how enthusiastic they are. They themselves are trying to run away all the time, but you try to move. You'll see how enthusiastic they are. Everybody's totally given to their position, actually. So in that position, turn around. OK, so then he says, ,, then he says, after this thing about still hearing something about Bodhidharma and ,, he said,

[29:48]

Therefore, also, how can people today not do it, not do the practice that they were doing these long days? Is now a good time to tell you something? I should tell you later. I could just sort of mumble about something for a little while until it's time to tell you. Wall gazing does not mean that he was gazing at the wall, OK? Wall gazing means that the wall was gazing. Or his mind, the point on his mind was like a wall. Walls don't see any objects, do they? I don't think they do. Wall gazing means you sit like a wall. You make your mind like a wall. So he was nine years, he was sitting there just like a wall.

[30:54]

There was the wall, and there was Bodhidharma, and you couldn't tell the difference between the two. Neither one of them had any objects of thought. So they called it wall need. This is the practice that he transmitted. And this is not having objects of thought. This is spontaneous. Uncontrived, you know what contrived means? What does contrived mean? Contrived means to do something to make something happen rather than just having spontaneous, something unnatural. So the natural way to come to mind, to obtain peace of mind, the natural way, the natural way, when you don't do anything, is to not have objects of thought. And the natural way to be disturbed is to have objects of thought. That's the natural way.

[31:56]

That's the sort of holistic way. To be upset is to have objects of thought. And the natural way to be at peace is to be like a wall, have your mind like a wall. What I said yesterday, how boring to be a wall. Have a mind like a wall. How boring. You have to be very enthusiastic about something to do that. Bodhidharma did it for nine years to make clear what he was talking about. Is that what they say? Yes. This isn't something that you can do. It's not a practice. This wargazing can't be a practice. You can't intend to do something that arises spontaneously. If you intend to do something and if you take an action, then you have an object. You can't do the wall-gazing, but you can make an effort to turn your mind around. And if you make an effort to turn your mind around, something meets you.

[33:00]

And in that meeting, wall-gazing happens. But you either have to direct your attention out or back. If you direct it out, wall gazing cannot happen. It cannot. If you turn it around, it can. But you turning it around doesn't cause it. It is caused not just by the turning around, but it is also caused by what you really are. That's why it's not really doing anything. The wall gazing isn't doing anything. Having no objects of thought is not doing anything. Repentance is not doing it truly being repentant doesn't really do anything but if you don't if you don't think of the things you've done and Admit them then repentance can't happen in other words Not doing anything can't happen unless you do something Because if you don't do something you'll do something else and You'll always do something, but you can do certain things which allow non-action to manifest.

[34:06]

But those things you do aren't the non-action. Buddhism isn't what you do, but what you do makes Buddhism possible. For example, if you bow, that's not Buddhism. But if you don't bow, there's no Buddhism. Wherever there's bowing, there's Buddhism. Wherever there's not bowing, there's not Buddhism. But the following is not the Buddhism. Right? Huh? I hope not. Buddhism is not the . Buddhism is not the and stuff like that. Buddhism is not all these things. But unless people make some effort through these modes, Buddhism can't manifest. In other words, we say, for example, purification. Purification is not due. to you saying, I did this thing, and I evolved these things. That's not what causes the purification. What causes the purification? Purification is sponsored by, is made possible by, wooden nature.

[35:13]

However, wooden nature cannot jump up and say hello unless you say hello. If you don't say, I did it, wooden nature can't say true words. Your action is not what causes it, but your action is necessary. That's what he just said here. The way is perfect and all-pervading. Why do you have to make an effort? It's because although it's perfect and all-pervading, unless you make an effort to meet it, you'll make an effort not to meet it. Your actions are going to take you on the path or off the path. They won't, they don't do nothing. They cause effects. So turning the mind around makes possible. Make possible what?

[36:15]

But then after they say this thing, how can you dispense with doing the factors that Bodhidharma and Chakramuni did? And he said, therefore, the first edition of the Pukanza Zen, he says, therefore, reverse the intellectual practice of investigating words and chasing after tar. Later translation says, therefore, stop the intellectual practice of investigating words and chasing after talk. We preferred expecting to ride the robber's horse to chase the robber. The robber is words. The robber is a detailer. But don't chase those words.

[37:23]

Get on the words that are robbing you and ride their horse to chase. In other words, don't let them be objects. The early translation says, take the backward step of turning the light and shining it back. of themselves, body and mind drop away. The turning it back is not the thing that makes the body and mind drop away. The body and mind are just waiting to drop away, but they need this. But it doesn't cause it. It's not it. The turning it around is not the dropping of the body and mind. But we have to turn around the body and mind to drop. Now, some of you are trying to turn around.

[38:25]

And maybe you don't know that the bottom line dropped when you tried. Maybe it didn't. Maybe you didn't really turn it around. The later translation says, Learn the backward step of turning the light and shining the flag. Learn or study. And as I mentioned a few weeks ago when I lectured here, Dogen Zenji says, to learn the self, to learn the Buddha way is to learn the self. And this word learning is a word that's used for learning to fly, learning to dance, studying books. So there's a learning process here, learning how to take the backward step, learning how to turn the light on. We're learning this now. You don't necessarily get it the first time you try. Or some people do get it the first time they try, and they get pregnant, and then

[39:39]

and then run away for a while. Take it back where it was nice. Why not just take it? But also, remember, he also says learn it or study it, because you may not be able to take it. You may feel that this is more complicated than that. Body and mind will drop away, and your original face will manifest. And then he says, if you want such a state, if you want a state of body and mind dropped away, if you want state called your original phase, then you should practice urgently at such a state. And the earlier translation says, if you want such a state, or if you want such, you should urgently work at Zazen. And this kind of instruction is for people

[41:44]

who are loitering around the entrance to the foot of town. Or you could say people who are wandering freely around the gate, the entrance. In one sense, I'm reading that section of the text as being somewhat complementary to and just saying that you're just lacking a little bit. What you're lacking is the entrance. But this is meditation, this is instruction about how to get in the door. People ask Dodie Vending, why do you recommend only sitting? There's so many teachings, he said, because sitting is the front door, is the right door. So I think from my feeling about myself and other people that we're wandering around the entrance and we're trying various doors.

[43:16]

And he's trying to say there is a right door. It can be described in many ways that they're all the same door. It is the door to get in. After you get in, we'll talk about that. There are other things to do. But how about getting in the door? Now, I also want to say that if you try this door and you get excited, confess yourself, repent yourself, be in your position. Don't get so excited that you don't feel you're where you are. You can't turn this door knob unless you get your hand up. So you have to keep this whole practice is done once you've established patience with your situation, once you've enthusiastically embraced your circumstances, and once you've concentrated on where you are and so on.

[44:18]

But you're actually just about doing that right now already. You're very focused. Just by following the schedule and sitting here, you're very close. You're a hair's breadth away. You're a slight discrepancy away, or maybe you're right there. where you are right now, and you're ready to turn. What happened? We are going to sell them out. It's a victim factor. Don't do that. Don't be there. Don't jump out.

[45:20]

Don't be there. [...] We can look at 800 miles and go over 200 miles. It's an extraordinary thing. We've got to do all of that. We've got to get water. We've got to get water. We've got to get water. So is that down again for you?

[46:21]

Yes, it is. Okay. Is that going to be okay? Well, I feel that what we're talking about here is a way of conducting yourself such that running into situations like that, you can act. You can make a correct response.

[47:25]

And it seemed like this morning, from what I hear, people did pretty well. Everybody knew. Still, that's pretty good. I'll have to say, I thought you'd pay. Chris. Well, we are going to that extent where it seems like, in practice, there are moral consciousnesses that generally learn from the philosophic one. So that a radical disruption And there's a practice in the White House to rapidly disrupt that. It seemed like a normal process of . And it seemed like a disruption like that, even when Zinn stepped away to make you aware of the topic. It's something I would have been more confident about.

[48:32]

But it is that. So maybe I can't, but that's an external problem. Maybe that will be soon. Or maybe it's a big problem. Or maybe it's not. It's you. You have to hurry it. You want something that's not a big problem. Or it'll be like this. Well, I don't know quite what to say about all that. Just that talk, I had to work really hard to see how I feel about all that. I feel kind of, you know, upset hearing about all that. And then, and then,

[49:41]

recognizing what quality of upset I'm experiencing. And then turn around and see how I carry on from there. That seemed rather real. There's no requirement for me to act faster than that that I can see right now. If there was, I would have acted faster. I get kind of just to go through this very slow process where people who were actually there had to go much faster. In Zen, in Soto Zen in particular, they put a lot of emphasis on taking care of the details in life, not spacing out, as they say.

[50:46]

We don't say, oh, this is just a carrot, so who cares? Or, it's just an object, so I won't take care of it. We take care of all the details. But when it comes to entrance, when it comes to getting in the door, then it isn't that we put down the external world, but we actually turn around from it. The external world is... I shouldn't say we do that. I'm just saying that's the instruction here. The entrance instruction is turn around from the external world. The external world is very stiff.

[51:51]

And very stiff. And you can't move it. But when you look back, there Everything is unobstructed. It includes everything. And there's no obstruction. An external world, the world of objects which are so hard and so bossy and so confusing, Our habits are relating to them. When we turn away from them and look back to a realm where we're not afflicted by these objects, sometimes we feel like, gee, how can I stay here? I have to go back to the world where I can get a hold of them, where I can judge and make judgments about how I'm doing.

[52:57]

So it's hard for us to turn back to the world behind thinking. And again, the turning happens from an experience. It isn't a general turning. It's a specific turning under certain circumstances. It's hard for us to do that because all of our habits can't get a hold of anything. And I don't want to say that this is all of Buddhism. I'm just talking about the ancients. And looking at Zen Center over the years, this Zen Center over the years, people have been diligently trying to be in the place they are. And this has been pretty good.

[54:05]

But very few people have encountered the difficulty of turning the mind around And therefore, very few people have entered the door. In a way, I'm sorry to say this, because in one sense, Zen Center is very kind and embracing all different practicing people. But it also seems to me that we need to confront the issue of going in. to the round of the to walking through the gate. Well, it just popped in my mind of something said by Dr. Abe's teacher. And it was a picture of him that probably turned me towards Zen.

[55:09]

And he said something like, Cornered, cornered, you pass through. Passing through, you change. So to some extent, I'm trying to corner us. Corner is in the practice of turning the light around, of learning this backward step. I'm giving you an option, too. Many people come to me and basically some people are coming to me and saying, you know, I'm going nuts doing this practice. I was okay before I started this. My nerve ends are getting frazzled from this. And I can see that that's what's happening. So then I kind of want to say, oh, well, I'm sorry. Go back to following your breathing. Don't forget your posture. Because it scares me to see people frustrated with trying to do this.

[56:15]

It scared me for one second, because if you're all so sincere and having such a hard time, I'm sorry. So pull back just to sort of concentrate on your posture and breathing. Then you'll be safe there. In other words, not go back there, but give up this practice that we're talking about now. Because you shouldn't go back to it. You should be doing the concentration on posture all the time. You should never, ever stop concentrating on the posture and breathing while you're doing this. Because it is the concentration on posture and breathing that you're turning around on. But if a person starts to get too excited, then I say, well, stop thinking about that and just go back. So in one sense, I'm actually somewhat frightened of the effects of this teaching is having on the Sangha. Because it is kind of, some of you are getting a little scared and frustrated trying this. But I do, I think it's necessary.

[57:17]

I think if you're going to get in this door, which you're right standing near, to walk through the door, you sort of have to kind of corner yourself into this practice and get yourself to do it. And again, when you turn around, what's it like there? vast, all pervading, including everything with no obstruction. It's wonderful, but there's no objects there to get a hold of. So then you think, oh, I'll be scared. I'll get a hold of that. Or I'll check to see if I'm doing it right, and I'll get a hold of that. Then you're coming back around again and looking at objects. And you're back home. Not back home, but you're back away from your home. But at least it's familiar. And it may not be that bad for a lot.

[58:19]

This is all, by the way, just to let you know, this is all commentary on the basic core instruction of the Fukan Dozenki. What kind of thinking is going on? How are you using your mind, Yao Shan? What's your mind operating like? What kind of thinking are you doing when you're totally sitting still, when you're totally concentrated? When you're completely giving, when you're completely careful, when you're completely enthusiastic and patient with your body sitting there, okay? What kind of thinking is going on? He says, I think of that which doesn't think. He could also say, I'm learning a backward step. I'm turning my light around. I'm turning the light around and illuminating the self.

[59:52]

That's the kind of thinking that goes on for the Zen teacher who's sitting still. This is the way. I propose to you that this is the way that Buddhists think. They think this strange way. The Buddhists think in this reverse way. It isn't that they don't see the world anymore. It's just that they don't see objects. Everything that happens, they turn around, and everything that happens is vast, including everything, unobstructed and all-pervading. Whenever they see anything, that's what they see.

[60:54]

They see nothing outside, and their minds are calm. But for us to enter that mind, we have to turn around. We have to reverse our usual thinking to adopt enlightened thinking. But it's still a kind of thinking. It's just a reverse turning around. And there's nobody in there saying, hey, you're doing it right. That's it. You got it. Or move over to the left. Or turn it in another direction. There's nobody in there saying anything. But everything's in there guiding you. Everything's guiding you. Dogen Zenji says, in that turning your mind around, who takes care of you? Who will take care of you?

[61:56]

Don't worry. Cool with it. You don't have to anymore. But you have to take your place and be in your place, and you have to reverse your mind. Another poem that I've sent you many times And this poem is a poem of this person, Hisamatsu Shin'ichi, who the picture of him the tracker needed then. I found out that when he died, next to his body, he had calligraphed this poem that I love so much by one word, which says, follow the screen to the source. The stream of your mind, follow it to the source. Don't go downstream. Go upstream. Go backstream to the source of the thought. Follow the stream to the source. Look back.

[63:00]

And when you get to the source, sit there and watch the clouds come up. There's no bells going off. Also, I don't have one more good idea. I just have a question for you, and that is, is it clear?

[64:11]

A little bit clear? Yeah. Seems like it's pretty clear. It's not easy, though, to figure out how to do it. It's simple, simple instruction, but not so easy. Boy, I know I have a hard time myself doing this. Would that make it easier? It was during the practice, and people ran out on that scene, but I would take my phone, and if I didn't find them, they wouldn't say anything to me. But it took me time. Something we didn't do the right thing.

[65:15]

We didn't wait a lot. [...] What's next? It's like a dream.

[66:05]

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