of the human arrows. It is Spirit by the Holy Spirit. It comes from above. It can therefore only be received from above. Now, it usually starts in the soul in this way that the soul feels And I say at the time when God wants to make a new step with the soul, the soul begins to feel a certain being drawn to. There are sweetness and consolations. are rising in the soul. We cannot explain them. We know, I think, not only instinctively but also explicitly that these first, let us say, tender buds of the new life, of the Christ life in our soul, that they are not the result of our own doings, our own desires and wishes.

[01:19]

but that they are stirrings of grace, they have in themselves a certain, how can I say, bonus odor, a certain freshness, a certain sweetness, an absolute purity which simply does not come from human nature. There are these moments, these drops of dew that fall into our soul, and we realize it when they are there. We feel drawn to prayer. We feel moved to love. But then, of course, the first thing is that we should do, as soon as these stirrings, these first pullings of God's grace start in the soul, not to take such a visitation, because that is what it is.

[02:24]

It's a visitation. Veni Dominus, visitavit nos in pace. He's visiting us in peace. Now, the first thing is that we don't take such a visitation as something that has to be expected, as something about which we are not surprised, which we receive as something that is kind of due to us. It's one of the sayings of the desert fathers. I always remember that when a monk had a vision, a vision of the angel of light. And the angel of light didn't hesitate to say, I am with you, the angel of light. And the answer of the monk was, I'm not worthy of you. and the angel of light disappeared and left the kind of sulphur smell in the cell.

[03:30]

He couldn't stand that. He couldn't do anything with a soul that was not worthy. So the devil always, you know, in that way too, approaches us certainly as an angel of light. We should, for the distinction of the spirit, you know, and to secure ourselves also against, in that way, against deceptions. The first reaction must be one of humility. This is truly and really a grace. Oh, Lord, I'm not worthy. that thou enterest under my roof. Oh, like St. John the Baptist, I am not worthy to loosen the straps of his shoes. So that is the first thing, you see, that we therefore also, it's the great, great, I mean, decision which has to be made right in the beginning, any kind of divine visitation, not try in any way to take it into your own hands, as St.

[04:46]

Benedict also says, not to try to prolong it. but to take it as a grace and therefore not to be dismayed when again this stirring and this visitation seizes with its light and its sweetness and again leaves us in the dark. The reaction to such a first stirring of grace, to this first being pulled by God, to this first being drawn by him, is that we keep two things in mind, and that we are inspired and feel moved to do two things. Not, I repeat it again, to desire or ask for a claim, a perpetuation of this status.

[05:49]

That is sometimes the mistake that is made, especially by beginners in the spiritual life. Feeling the sweetness of that divine visitation, one decides right away, oh, that's what I have to have all my life. That's what I have to have. I have to be a man of prayer, something like that. That's already on the wrong track. then we are already right away answering this divine visitation on the part of God with our arrows. And of course, this arrows feels, you know, that the divine agape contains and brings that peace which the arrows really, in last analysis, cannot give us, but which the arrows is longing for. So therefore not to do that, but right away, as soon as we feel such a consolation in our soul given us, such a visitatio divina, then the first thing is not to perpetuate the state as such, but to do our little steps.

[07:10]

now to, let us say, in the power and in the sweetness of this impulse, to seek God, to feed the love that I feel springing up in the soul. And this feeding of the love, this feeding of the love, because this was just a little kindling, there was a little spark, Now that little spark as spark cannot perpetuate, be perpetuated. It has now to be developed, has to be fed. The first way in which it has to be fed is that we receive and are ready and eager to receive the word of God in the depth of our heart, that we know more about him, that we listen to his word.

[08:13]

In this first initial experience, we have intuitively met God as our Father. We have intuitively met and felt the presence of the Good Shepherd. Now we have to turn, say, to the ordinary way in which this love now has to be fed and has to be developed. Now who offers itself in this task to feed our love? To feed the love is the function of the mother. Who is our mother? It's the church. That right away has to be realized. There is this initial, you know, a new life is being born, stirring in my soul.

[09:15]

It has to get the mother to be fed. The only right mother to feed it is the church. And there's another thing and another mistake which is so often made. You know, this first stirring of grace has, as every beginning, I always tell you that, every beginning always contains in itself the whole thing and in some way already anticipates the end. But that's also the danger if somebody who has no experience in the spiritual life, you know, of course, feels also in this beginning already the beauty of the end. That is the meaning of this initial grace. As initial grace it has to give a foretaste of the end. But of course it would be absolutely against the designs of God to take it as the end.

[10:18]

God does never begin with the end, with the beginning. So therefore the fact that these initial stirrings of grace in the soul have already in them the taste of the end, the taste of the absolute, the final. Very often leads people then, instead of obediently turning to the church as their mother and sucking, as it were, the breasts of Jerusalem, right away go to the witnesses of highest mystical stages. and feed their soul on something, some sayings, some writings that are far above their level, that do not belong to the beginning, but they may be the end. They may be the end. And therefore, instead of, let us say, coordinating

[11:25]

these beginnings of life, of the spiritual life in their soul, instead of letting this new vine rank on the, what is it, trellises, you know, that are established by the church, you know, one right away tends to hide. And in that way, it's in danger to destroy the whole plant. One doesn't find the pattern of the trellis. And that this pattern of the trellis, the activity, the church as the mother, that we find in the liturgy of the church. There is the feeding ground for our love. And that's for every Christian. And therefore, stirrings of the divine grace have to be fed then through the liturgical life of the church.

[12:29]

That is the via ordinaria. That is the way of the economia divina. That is the divine plan which we have to follow if we really want to develop this end, this beginning into the right end on the way which God himself in his agape for us has established. So therefore it is the church which has to be recognized as the first mother of our spiritual life. Take, for example, just take today, take what you have as monks, what you have met today, of words, what has been put before you as spiritual food by the church today. just this morning in the lessons, you know, of the Saturday, this beautiful word of the prophet Isaiah.

[13:33]

You have been a strength to the poor. a strength to the needy in his distress, a refuge from the whirlwind, a shadow from the heat. These beautiful words describe the God of the divine agape, the Javi of the Old Testament, the Saviour God, that right away in Matins, and then continuing, He shall cast death down headlong for ever. And the Lord God shall wipe away tears from every face, and the reproach of his people he shall take away from off the whole earth, for the Lord has spoken it.

[14:38]

And they shall say in that day, Lo, this is now our God. We have waited for him, and he will save us. This now is the Lord. We have patiently waited for him. We shall rejoice and be joyful in his salvation. These words must be kept in our soul. They should not simply pass by, but they should leave a mark and they should be remembered. They should be remembered with this intention. We know very well, looking into the future, that again and again, in the course of life, in the course of one hour even, whatever we are doing becomes our own.

[15:41]

the situation in which we are certainly may lose all its light, all its warmth. We may start freezing, get cold, and get darkened interiorly. All these signs of losing the peace of Christ may arise again in our soul, just as some days ago this visitatio took place in which I rejoiced. Now then, I keep these things, these words, because that's what they are meant for. They are meant as means to go back into the peace of Christ. And if we ask ourselves, what is the word, a concrete way of going back into the peace of Christ, just remember a word like this, I am the shadow from the heat. I am your refuge in the whirlwind. And how often are we in a whirlwind?

[16:45]

Always do we have to be. And so, therefore, that's what they are there for. Also, very often during the day, we taste the taste of death in so many various ways. And to know I have thrown down death headlong. I wipe away every tear. All these, what the same lesson calls the faithful, true designs of God forever. Amen. It's a beautiful word, also. I say this, all the 25th chapter. the eternal designs of God, faithful forever. Amen. See, there is just such a word which contains in it, you know, just that tremendous stability of God's love.

[17:54]

So if things change, if, as we say in the school, the lights go out, then what do I do? I ask myself, What has changed? Has that love of God for me changed? Has God taken back those promises? Is it not true forever? Amen? Those questions we have to ask. And then with the help of these divine promises, which are thundering into our ears morning after morning, We should really rely on them, and we should use them to sink into that peace which they promise, and which for us now in the New Testament is a completely new reality. And that is the Mass today, starting Rorata Ceri, this wonderful Mass.

[18:56]

Drop down, do ye heavens, from the bark. You see, that's all the language of the divine agape. That's not the language of human errors, of human effort, but that is the cry for the love that descends. Let the clouds rain the just. And then it comes, the answer to that beautiful word. A virgin shall conceive. and bear a son, and his name shall be called Emmanuel, God with us. A virgin shall conceive, that means not out of blood, not out of the will of man. But out of God is he born. See, that's the language of the divine agape, not of human errors. But we take it as such.

[19:56]

We take and understand the sign of the Virgin. and we'd understand the name of the song, God with us, Emmanuel. Not as we said last year, not we with God, but God with us. That's the divine agape. And a name like that, you know, again should stick to our memory. It should become a force, a spiritual force in us, which burns then, a candle that burns, when things around us become dark, and they have to be dark because they constantly again and again are swallowed up by the human arrows. And then in the fear not, for you have found grace with God, And the Holy Ghost shall come upon you and the power from on high shall overshadow you.

[20:58]

Every word like this is the word of the divine agape. Because it presents, it describes the fulfillment. Now he comes. Now he descends. And then the answer of the Virgin, be it done unto me according to your word. You see, that is the agape descending. That is the answer of the Virgin, the humility and the obedience, the only vessels for that agape which descends. And then in Holy Communion, a Virgin conceives bears a son, and his name shall be called Emmanuel. The sign realized sacramentally in the mystery of this celebration, in all reality for every one of us who goes there to the altar to receive him.

[22:05]

what could be more clear, what could be more convincing, what could be more than also a life in our memory, so that we are able, thinking of these things, to return into the peace of Christ as soon as we have lost it. But you see, so often instead of Doing these steps, returning into the peace of Christ, not by, let us say, simply by an act of the will, but by a word, under the guidance of a divine light, that is something that I have to emphasize very much. Nobody can fulfill this advice of the school to return into the peace of Christ simply by an act of the will. It is not.

[23:07]

The peace of Christ is not at the disposal of our will, just isn't. We cannot simply say to ourselves, oh, I want to go back to the peace of Christ. No, we have to be guided there. by the light that God's divine agape is constantly sending us, that God has planted in our memory through his holy word. The descent of God's love to us is revealed to us in concrete words, in concrete events, in concrete persons. In order to go into the peace of Christ, we have to follow these words. We have to follow the example of these persons. We have to, and that is the last and most beautiful thing, renew the events. And we renew them in the sacraments, the sacramental world of the church.

[24:08]

That is the essence of the mysterium. St. John the Baptist, the same, completely in the same pattern, and another person that we follow that leads us into the peace of Christ. I am not the Christ. I am not Elias, not a prophet. None of these titles. I am the voice of one crying. I am the voice of one crying. Nothing but a voice. That again is faithfully and beautifully the pattern of the divine agape. St. John the Baptist presents it to us as the voice of one crying. Nothing but the voice. He it is, who though he comes after me, takes rank before me. I am not worthy to untie the strap of his shoe.

[25:09]

And then again, to more in the communion, say to the faint-hearted, take courage and fear not. Behold, our God comes and saves us. And that is a reality in Holy Communion. Therefore, fill the minds, that is the first. The first step is, or not a step, but the first beginning is, that is to say, the first stirring of the soul, of the Holy Spirit in the soul. Then comes our answer. Fill the mind with the words, the people, and the events which God himself has put up as signposts that lead us into the fullness of the peace of Christ. Mary, St. John, the Emmanuel, descending from heaven. Those we have to have ready in our memory.

[26:11]

and then open our soul, and that is an even more important step, to open our soul to the mystery, the sacramental reality, where all these words, events, and people become a reality here for me. In the Mass and celebrating this morning's Mass, we are Mary. receiving the message of the angel, becoming the mother of the Savior in Holy Communion. Tomorrow we are John the Baptist. I'm not the Christ, the voice of one crying. Take courage. Our God comes and saves us. These divine mysteries, they are the real seal, they are the real perfection, the telos of all the worlds and all history and all the persons that we meet on the pages of Holy Scripture.

[27:17]

But again, you see, we have to take that and realize that in all its divine fullness, here is the epiphany. Here the manifestation takes place. Here he comes really to his city. Therefore we have to accept in the depth of our soul that we are being more deeply planted into Christ. in the very depth not only of our imagination, not only of our memory, not only therefore in what we call a moral or psychological way, but we are planted into the very being of the Divine Agape through the celebration of the Holy Mystery, especially through the Mass. In the depth of our being we are reached by receiving Holy Communion in a way which is beyond all our feelings.

[28:27]

And that again is so essential to the divine agape because the divine agape simply belongs into the sphere of being. The divine agape is essentially creative. and therefore works and creates through these sacramental signs which have been instituted by the divine agape as the means through which she wants to penetrate beyond all psychological emotions or recollections into the very being of our soul. And that is the real peace of Christ. Christ stays with us. Why and how? Through the sacraments. And therefore we have to take them as such. And then, of course, we have to do our little steps to develop

[29:30]

this sacramental grace that is given to us by constantly then doing our little steps in all faithfulness, returning into the peace of Christ, which I know is in my soul. to rise and to go there, to that place which God himself visibly and daily pledges to me. So therefore we have to, as you see, we have the essence really is in this whole constant returning. It means fight in a concrete way with the means that God's love puts at your disposal against sloth and against sleep by making our little steps. asking ourselves these questions, what has changed?

[30:34]

Has God's love for me changed? And then check it, as it were, on a word like that of Isaiah's that we have heard today, my God's eternal designs, forever faithful, amen. Or we return to the fulfillment of the sign that Isaiah has seen in the Annunciation. And we see then in a mass like this today that this Annunciation is not a past event, it has entered into our life. And there Christ is. We are truly and really Mary. And therefore, Why are then, you see, people, they are asked so often the wrong questions too. They think, you know, we go and receive Holy Communion. Communion is Christ. Therefore, one receiving Christ should put changes all around without doing it.

[31:39]

That would be magic. But the sacraments are not magic. Redemption is not a magic thing. and therefore expecting this just as when the initial graces kind of bird in the soul, they say, oh my, this is already the end. Fine, I want, this is just right for me. I only want to get it, you know, in this way it should stay. then also in the sacraments, you know, where we receive Christ. Therefore, how can this come to me, this terrible unhappiness that I experience here? How can this terrible darkness, you know, suddenly come upon my soul? How can I get enveloped, you know, in all these temptations, in all this whirlwind, and in all this heat, and so on? And then, you know, what do we do? Complain with God, you know, and It's too bad that he gives us Christ, but then he doesn't seem to take care and make it a reality for us, you know. No, we have to take this reality, but in faith, you know, not in speech.

[32:44]

It isn't. In faith it has to be taken. That's the essence of this, our status, our status. We are Tauris. We are not at the end. and for the status viatoris, the only answer to the invasion of God's love into our soul is faith. The only way to keep it in that way and develop it is to return to it, make it alive. Why are temptations sent to us? Why do darknesses invade our soul? Why do we get these feelings of frost and of terrible unhappiness and so on? Why do we do it? Because they are stepping stones. God sends them as a means to remind, and by reminding really, developing the being that is in the very depth of our soul, the new being. Otherwise it cannot be developed.

[33:45]

We are not angels. We are spirits in a body, and therefore the only way to develop is just as our cognition always in our knowledge proceeds by contrast, the only way to develop our spiritual life is through contrast. That's the way in which we proceed as human nature, and that's not changed by grace. Nobody who is baptized, you know, then ceases to be a German or a Frenchman or a Jew or whatever. Well, let's come back to this eternal... Dilemma. So, therefore, you know, that is what we have to do. But, you see, the fact, you know, of the sacramental reality that we have received in Holy Mass, as I say, does not free us, you know. does not in a magic way suddenly change us into angels of light, but it gives us a completely different approach and a completely different way to deal with and to use these darknesses and these obstacles and these stones that God puts into our way.

[34:57]

In every box, you see, everything depends that we really use them. Any such darkness is an invitation. Now do your little steps. Now remember. Now return in the obedience of the one whom you have strayed away from in the sloth of disobedience.

[35:20]

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