Well, I've just returned from Tassajara, where I was leading the practice period for several months, and I'm ready to participate again with all of you, and I appreciate the way everyone has cooperated in taking care of the Zen Center. The feeling is very good to me coming back. Tassajara is a wonderful experience. I think at some point I would hope that we would all experience a monastic practice, retreating from the world and concentrating on practice in a way that is pretty hard to do otherwise.

[01:10]

But even in such an isolated retreat as Tathagatagarbha, all of us are still who we are. and the same problems arise in that monastic setting as arise in our life in the world. The difference is that it's more difficult to escape. Here we have many toys and playthings and our wall is rather indistinguishable. In other words, you can go wherever you want, you think, but wherever we go, we take ourselves with us.

[02:12]

And there's really no escape from who we are. So when we find ourself in a situation like Tassajara, where you can't go anywhere, and you see the same people all the time, and you do the same stuff all the time, and before long, you're completely exposed And there's no way to escape. You have to face whatever it is that you are. So it's quite wonderful in that way, and difficult. And the same things come up there as come up here. And what I find, both here and there, is people have a very difficult time about being self-centered.

[03:20]

We have a very difficult time with our ego and knowing who we are. And we want a lot, but We don't like to give so much. And we may even think that we're generous. But when push comes to shove, how generous are we? And what cherished things do we hang on to? We cherish our anger. We cherish our acquisitiveness. We're very insecure people. And Buddhist practice is to release us from our insecurity by making us completely insecure.

[04:32]

With nothing to hang on to, you can be completely free. but very difficult. So what I'm... I want to read you a sutra, a Buddhist sutra. Before I go on, I just want to say something about Because I know I'll forget to say this at the end. I have to say it now. That our one-day sitting is going to be Saturday the 14th. It's been changed from the 22nd. And so I would like to see all of us sit together

[05:41]

on the 14th, it would be a good way for you and I to meet again and give us a good start for the new year. So I encourage everyone to please come to that one-day sitting on the 14th. And please, if you can, think about doing it. This sutra is a Pali scripture, Hinayana, comes from the Hinayana side of our practice. And it's called the Metta Sutra, Metta Sutta. Metta means love.

[06:46]

And metta also means kindness, maybe loving kindness or well-wishing for yourself and the world or the universe. And this Metta is a real basis for a Buddhist practice We talked about enlightenment and meditation and Zazen and Wisdom and so forth but Wisdom and Compassion or compassion is just, we use the term compassion a lot but actually I think meta is maybe a more appropriate term because compassion is one of the aspects of meta.

[08:04]

Compassion is suffering, realizing the suffering of others, and to empathize or sympathize with the suffering of others. And it's one of the aspects of metta, which is pure love. So metta and wisdom are two sides of non-duality, of enlightenment. And metta is the expression of wisdom. How do we express wisdom in our life? This is a big question. We may get enlightened.

[09:07]

We may have all kinds of wonderful Zen wisdom, but how is it expressed? So, wisdom and metta are the two wheels, or the two wheels of our enlightenment vehicle. And actually, you can't say which comes first. But wisdom is the basis and metta is its expression. So this metta, I just want to read this metta sutra, which is very short, and talk about it a little bit. And the sutra goes like this. This is what should be accomplished by one who is wise and who seeks the good and has obtained peace.

[10:16]

Let one be strenuous, upright and sincere, without pride, easily contented and joyous. Let one not be submerged by the things of the world. Let one not take upon oneself the burden of riches. Let one's senses be controlled. Let one be wise, but not puffed up. And let one not desire great possessions, even for one's own family. Let one do nothing that is mean or that the wise would reprove. And then it says, may all beings be happy. May they be joyous and live in safety, all living beings, whether weak or strong, in high or middle or low realms of existence, small or great, visible or invisible, near or far, born or to be born. May all beings be happy. Let no one deceive another nor despise any being in any state.

[11:27]

let alone by anger or hatred wish harm to another. Even as a parent, at the risk of one's own life, watches over and protects one's only child, So, with a boundless mind, should one cherish all living things, suffusing love over the entire world, above, below, and all around, without limit, so let one cultivate an infinite goodwill toward the whole world. Standing or walking, sitting or lying down, during all one's waking hours, let one cherish the thought that this way of living is the best in the world. Abandoning vain discussions, having a clear vision, freed from sense appetites, one who is made perfect will never again know rebirth."

[12:34]

This Sutra in the beginning is kind of like a teaching, but then in the middle It changes. The first part and the last part are like a teaching, but the middle part is like a prayer. Because the first part says, what should be accomplished is this. And then it suddenly changes and says, may all beings be happy and may they be joyous and so forth. And then it ends with, may all beings be happy. That little part there, is kind of like a prayer, and then it goes back again to the teaching. And for a long time, I used to think that Zazen took the place of prayer. In most religions, there's prayer, but in Buddhism, we don't tend to think of

[13:41]

prayer, because prayer somehow presupposes a deity. One prays to God, or one prays to some deity, but in Buddhism, there's no deity. Buddhism is not atheistic. Atheistic is... that's too strong. Buddhism is non-theistic. Sometimes Buddhist scholars will say Buddhism is atheistic, which sounds anti-theistic. But Buddhism is non-theistic. Buddhism recognizes all the world's gods, does not prescribe or has not invented one.

[14:54]

And although in Buddhism, Buddhism comes pretty close in the Mahayana, Buddha nature is universal nature. which is the essence of everything. And sometimes Buddhism talks about mind only, which is kind of like Buddha nature, but never really focuses on a being or a deity as the ultimate. So in prayer, Usually, prayer presupposes an ultimate deity. And so for a long time, I thought, along with others, that Sazen, or meditation, is to Buddhism what prayer is to other religions.

[16:00]

But actually, this kind of sutra, this kind of attitude is Buddhist prayer. It doesn't need to have a deity. It doesn't need to be directed toward a deity. It's just sent out into the universe. It's a wish or a an expression of deepest feeling. Because in Buddhadharma, our understanding of Buddhism, there's no separation between the high and the low, or between spirituality and materialism. Spiritual and the material are not two different things.

[17:06]

Mind and body are not two different things. Buddha nature and human beings are not two different things. So a Buddhist way of thinking or of understanding is all-inclusiveness. Everything is myself. So, in this way, to express metta as a kind of prayer, or to express metta both verbally, thinking, and in action, is Buddhist prayer. One thing that There's no supplication in this sutra. There's no asking for something.

[18:07]

There's only expressing dana or giving. And I think this is a very important point because it's not trying to receive something. But it's bringing something forth from inside and expressing it as you would wish it to be. And in Buddhism, in Mahayana Buddhism, there's a word or expression called Adhistana. And Abhisthana means the assistance or meeting of the Buddhas. And it's kind of mystical, a little bit mystical for Buddhism.

[19:14]

But it means when your effort is made, then your effort is met. In other words, the effort that you make is met by Buddha nature or by Buddha, whatever that is, which is rather indefinable. But the universe meets you in your effort and in your sincerity. So without expecting something, we make our effort. I think this is an important point.

[20:20]

Because according to Buddhist understanding, we create our own world. There's no fate in Buddhism. And whatever our actions are, create the next actions and create the circumstances for our life. endlessly. At the end of this sutra, it says, abandoning vain discussions, having a clear vision, freed from sense appetites, one who is made perfect will never again know rebirth. This rebirth is an important issue. You can speak about rebirth on various levels, but once you live with this attitude, then

[21:54]

you're no longer creating karma, which is causing painful or deluded states. So when our actions come from ignorance, over and over again, we create states which grow from ignorance. When our actions come from our pathological state of mind, then we create more pathological states of mind, because things are born from the parent. Our states come out of our actions and thinking. So when we have wholesome states, wholesome actions, we create wholesome states. And when we have unwholesome actions, we create unwholesome states.

[22:58]

It's very simple. We experience it moment by moment, day by day. And so-called lifetime after lifetime, you can see a lifetime as one day's life. Every day is a new lifetime. And today's lifetime, is determined by yesterday's lifetime, and tomorrow's lifetime is determined by what happens today, even though each day is discrete and has its own life. So what the Sutra is saying is how to get out how to return to our wholeness so that we and all sentient beings are no longer reborn in difficult, terrible states moment after moment.

[24:18]

And there's another term called, which means re-revolving or turning around. And this turning around, it means to change our basis from being ego-centered to being centered on Buddha nature. When we're ego-centered, then everything looks like it's outside of us. It looks like I am here and everything is outside. Subject, a lot of objects. And so naturally we become defensive because we think that all these beings are against us.

[25:37]

They're either for us or against us. And Turning means, on the basis, means to turn around so that the ego actually finds its rightful place amongst the objects of the world. Sometimes people say, get rid of ego. And there are two levels of ego. In actuality, there is no ego. Because if there was an ego, really, there would always be an ego. And all the egos would still be here.

[26:42]

But as you can see, they're not. But we feel something. We feel like we have a soul. I think the term soul is okay to use, as long as you don't believe in it. Soul means something like the feeling of our individuality, deep feeling of our individuality. And in Buddhism, we don't like to use the word soul because when we say that, we stop thinking any further. But as a kind of description of our feeling of individuality, we can use that term. But if we believe in it, then we stop there, we get stuck there.

[27:48]

So our feeling of ego is what we reside on, we take our stand on this feeling of ego or soul. We talk about soul food, you know, it's wonderful, it really makes us feel at home. food that really makes us feel at home, soul food. It's great. So I very much respect and appreciate that word. But we have to be careful not to get, not to believe in it, actually, because it stops us from being, from realizing our true nature, which goes beyond our individuality. stops us from seeing everything as ourself. So this sutra is very simple and sounds like a sermon on loving kindness, but it's very deep.

[29:07]

And in order to really practice this teaching, you have to completely give up ego. So this is actually our practice. how we get out of ourself by serving others, by taking care of each other, and by not forgetting ourself. This is also dangerous. We say, well, drop the self, forget the self, But the self also has to be included. The soul, or the ego, also has to be included.

[30:18]

It's like a horizontal and vertical, you know? In horizontal, everything falls down to one place. Gravity brings everything down to one place. And Buddhist enlightenment is to realize that everything is exactly the same. And so, when you send thoughts of loving kindness into the universe, it means indiscriminately, without choosing who you like or who you don't like. this is like completely giving up ego. And it's called ecstasy. But this way is this person is tall, this person is short, this person I don't like, this person I do like,

[31:38]

And this is a fact of life. There's the horizontal and the vertical. And in the vertical, everything is sticking its head up one way or another. And we either like it or we don't like it. It either hurts us or it doesn't hurt us. It either gives us something or it takes something away. So this is the realm that we're all involved in, where everything sticks its head up and gives us a problem. So, we can't ignore that realm. But where the two meet, vertical and horizontal meet, is where our life is and where we have to make our decisions moment by moment. So, How to understand what is vertical and what is horizontal is our practice.

[32:47]

Dogen, when he came back from China, people said, well, what did you bring back from China to Japan? He said, well, I didn't bring back anything, but all I know is that my eyes are horizontal, my nose is vertical. He's not just talking about his body. He's talking about the vitality of birth and death on each moment and how to face life, how to face birth and death on each moment. Everything is myself. This is to take away no soul, no ego. I am just whatever everything else is beyond my wish.

[34:01]

Rinzai, Lin Chi said, everything is just I control the world because everything is just exactly the way I want it to be. This is taking away everything and being everything. But, on the other hand, we have to make choices and discriminate moment after moment. So even though we may feel we want to love everyone, we really don't. And it's really hard, really difficult. And so in our daily life, we treat so-and-so a certain way, and then we treat Mary this way, and we treat Joe this way, and so forth, right?

[35:08]

That's very natural to do. But mostly, we see everything vertically. And we don't see things horizontally. We see only the world of comparison. And in the world of comparison, there's love and hate and all the opposites. But in the horizontal world, everything is the same. So, in love, this is true love, where everything is the same. And even if somebody cuts your head off, you don't hate them.

[36:10]

So we have to be aware of this world, the indiscriminate world. At the same time, we live in the discriminating world. And we have to get our awareness to this non-discriminating world, realm. Then we know how to discriminate, how to live in this world where everything is discriminated. And it's called the discrimination of non-discrimination. Even though I don't like you, doesn't mean that I don't love you. But if we're just in the non, in the discriminating world, then there's just love and hate and there's no place to go.

[37:39]

You just bounce around between love and hate. I was reading my son, book about, well first there's this book about the ancient world and one was the story of the Vikings and another story was the story of Rome and reading in the story of the Vikings the Vikings were really bloodthirsty they would take their ships and go all over the world just pillaging and The Romans were the same, really bloodthirsty people in a lot of ways. They loved... the Colosseum was an arena for all the viciousness of human nature.

[38:48]

And then Christianity came along and changed the ancient world. That's a kind of, I think it's a kind of miracle. So in a lot of ways, Buddhism is not so different from Christianity. And I think that this is where they both meet. And you know, Buddhism is non-theistic,

[40:13]

Christianity is theistic. There are different ways of looking at things. In this way, I think they meet. I think this sutra, although Sutra doesn't appeal to something outside, but expresses something from inside. And this is a kind of difference between Buddhism and Christianity. Buddhism puts the emphasis on the person rather than something outside. So, in order to change something, It's up to us, to each one of us, to manifest that change.

[41:18]

This is called effort. This is where our effort is. And without this effort, there's no practice. You can read about Zen and Buddhism all day long, but without practice, without actually manifesting this effort, it doesn't... without the effort, it doesn't manifest. So, this is called Buddhist life. This replaces ordinary life. This kind of practice replaces the ordinary life of quarreling and vengeance and hatred and self-centeredness.

[42:23]

So when we enter into practice, that's what we enter into, giving all that up, turning the bases. When you can cultivate that kind of foundation, then you can sit Zazen. Dogen says, it's only necessary to sit Zazen. And people think, oh, only Zazen. But they don't understand that This is Zazen. The non-dual realm is Zazen. It doesn't matter whether you're sitting cross-legged or working in a factory.

[43:34]

If you always are abiding in non-dual mind, then that's Zazen. And it means identification. It means to realize that everything is yourself, even though all things seem to exist independently. This is only Zazen. No other practices are needed. I don't think we have time for questions.

[44:46]

So, thank you.

[44:55]

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