One might say that there are two kinds of meditation practice in the Buddha way. One kind, a practice based on belief itself. or a practice where you still believe that you exist independent of all other living beings. Another kind of meditation practice is the kind of practice that comes from a person who no longer believes that she is existing independently.

[01:01]

The first kind of meditation practice is a practice that the person based on belief in self, thinks that she can do by herself, by her own personal effort. The second kind of practice is a practice done by a person who realizes that meditation and the ancestors is not a meditation done by an individual person. The meditation practice of the Buddhas is realized by independent world. is intimacy with the total concerted activity of all beings, which of course is not something that a person can do.

[02:32]

It is also not something that a person can avoid being, because actually what each person is, is the total dynamic interpenetrating function of the entire universe. Every person is like this. Every planet is like this. Every rock is like this. Things are this way. And the way all things are is the meditation practice of the universe. Now, the practice of meditation from the point of view is another form of karma. The meditation practice from the understanding of anything by myself is not another kind of karma.

[03:46]

It doesn't include innate karma. It is beyond karma. The meditation practice which is karmic, and which I can do, is sometimes called by the Zen master, Dogen, the nir. It's nir, right? Some of you may know about this practice that you think you can do. or a life that you think you can do. And a life or a practice not based on self, a life and a practice that emerges from being free of the idea of independent existence, a meditation practice that spontaneously merges the interdependence of all beings.

[05:02]

That kind of practice might seem far away. And actually, Dogen Zenji calls that the far. But he doesn't say that we should dislike practice and like, which is from the point of view of what I can do. He also says we shouldn't like or think that that's good. Rather, without esteeming or despising the practice and life which we now live by our own effort, by our own personal power. He says, rather than esteeming or despising, we should become adept. We should do it wholeheartedly. Even though our karmic life is based on the delusion, independence,

[06:11]

We should not despise our deluded activity. We should be adept at our deluded activity. We should do our deluded activity impeccably. And by being wholehearted about everything we do, about all our karma, This world of karma naturally reveals itself in its illusory quality and becomes the stepping stone to jump into the practice, which we can't do. The impeccable practice of the world of karma naturally transcends itself and leaps into the ineffable practice of non-karma. So in traditional Buddhism, they teach the to become more and more proficient at the path of personal effort, until finally you see that personal effort is nonsense, that the whole basis of it is simply a misunderstanding.

[07:34]

But it's hard to see that, exert your delusion. you can do something all by yourself. If you have part of it, exercise your independent operation, you will sunk in that delusion forever. If you completely exhaust that delusion to the end of it, you'll see that it's just a delusion and you'll become terrific. So we don't despise our deluded self-centered karmic practices. We study them and practice them to their end. And then we can leap beyond.

[08:39]

We naturally leap beyond. Similarly, Dogen Zenji says we should not esteem or despise the father. We should not dislike a practice of zazen which we cannot do. We shouldn't dislike it, and we shouldn't like it.

[09:44]

We shouldn't esteem it and say, oh, that's the best practice. Or the worst. Some people think it's wonderful, and it is. And then they like it. Some people think it's wonderful, but they find out they can't do it. But without hating this zazen of the Buddha, or loving it, Dogen then encourages us to become adept at it. How do you become adept at what you can't do? You give yourself entirely to the world that you can't do. You devote yourself to a practice that you can't do. You become proficient at a selfless practice. You practice just like a Buddha.

[10:48]

How does a Buddha practice? Well, a Buddha doesn't try to be a Buddha. So you practice to be a Buddha. Also, a Buddha doesn't try to be himself. He just is. She just is. So you can devote yourself to a worldly karmic practice And if you do it completely, you can truly transcend it and enter into a practice which is beyond karma. If you give yourself entirely to the karma which is based on self-delusion and exert it to the fullest, you realize the illusion of it and enter the practice of Buddha. Or you can immediately enter the practice of Buddha. It's just that you can't. So if you want to do practice, go ahead. It's all right. I don't esteem you or despise you for doing it. But if you do it wholeheartedly, I do this to you.

[11:51]

Because in your wholeheartedness, you're Buddha. Or you can do immediately Buddhist practice, which is a practice that you can't do, that you can't get anything from, and that you do by becoming intimate with all beings and all Buddhas. You just throw yourself in the Buddha's house. other than here. You throw yourself into here and now with no way to do that. You give up personal power and you make the big transition to intimacy with the total concerted activity of the universe, which is already where you are. Either way, they're not really different. Only the mind makes a difference. Practice the near.

[12:58]

Practice the near, which you can do. Practice the far, which you can't do by yourself and nobody else can do for you. Personally, I prefer to practice the far. Where I find myself in a need to practice the near, I try to do it wholeheartedly. including that I feel a little ashamed of my delusion that I can do something. But when I am deluded into thinking I can do something by my own power, I try to be wholehearted about it and admit it. That's a quiet shout. We weren't frightened, yes.

[14:02]

So in this Soto Zen school, you know, one of our main texts was called in Japanese . And this text is chanted every night during practice period, I believe, in the head temples of the Soto school. last period of meditation, the monks chant this in Japanese, but they're in Japan. We used to do it here in Tatsuhara in Japanese, but we stopped because we're not Japanese. But now we chant it in English, don't we? But not every night, do we? But you could do it privately yourself. It's a wonderful text. In English, it's called The Ceremony for the Universal Encouragement of Dazen.

[15:21]

The Ceremony for the Universal Encouragement of Dazen. And usually, when it's translated in English, they don't translate the most important word, ceremony. means ceremony. But usually, they forget to translate that word. I think they think, oh, people don't like ceremonies, so don't call it ceremony. But what Dogen Zenji describes in that text is a ceremony. The zazen which we do when we come into this room bow and walk before a seat and have the cushion and sit cross-legged and observe the points of posture. These yogic points of posture which we observe are ceremonial procedures which we follow. It's a ceremony that we do in this room. The ceremony we do in this room is not the dhajan.

[16:23]

of the Buddhist ancestors. It is a ceremony which celebrates the zazen of the Buddhist ancestors. Now you can do the ceremony or you can join all beings during the ceremony. But the ceremony is not zazen. However, even though it's not zazen, when we give ourselves entirely to the ceremony, Zazen is realized in this room. It comes alive in the ceremony, but it's not in the ceremony. As it says in the Jewel Mirror Samadhi, the meaning is not in the words, but it responds to the arrival of energy. It responds to the inquiring impulse.

[17:26]

It responds to the giving of your energy to a practice. It's not in your effort. It's not in the ceremony. It's not in the sitting posture. But when you sit like that, the meaning of that sitting responds to your sitting. And the meaning is actualized in the response between your effort and all being's. And the response is immediate, so you can't see it later. It happens exactly at the moment you sit. The moment you sit. The moment you sit. The meaning is responding to you, moment by moment. You know, ceremony that celebrates the wondrous interdependent world of the Buddha.

[18:36]

You know, and celebrates means the ceremony that frequents the world of Buddha. We'll also speak of Zazen, which you can do as a carved dragon, or a carved version of real Zazen. And that refers to an old Chinese story about a man who loved dragons. He carved dragons, and he had dragons carved with him. He carved dragons out of wood. He carved dragons out of jade, out of lapis lazuli, out of coral. He had a wonderful collection of carved dragons.

[19:42]

And one day, a real dragon was flying through the air above his house and saw this collection of carved dragons and said, oh, he probably wants to meet a real dragon. So he came down to the house to visit him. And the man saw him. He was shocked and fainted. But the real dragon comes to the person who makes the card dragons. He doesn't come down to visit because he figures they probably don't like dragons. There's no dragons in the house. He probably doesn't like dragons. The dragon's up in the sky, no matter what, lying around. It isn't that they don't like you. It's just they don't feel you want to see them, because you don't put on an invitation card.

[20:47]

Buddhas don't want to bother you. If they see you practicing sitting like a Buddha, kind of like sitting Why we don't like this? They say, oh, he doesn't like Buddha. Oh, well, don't visit him. He wouldn't want Buddha to show up. Because he's kind of ambivalent about this Buddha thing. When Buddha sees a wholehearted person, Buddha is there. And when a person is not even wholehearted anymore, but hides into the world of all beings, then there's no other Buddha. And Buddha doesn't even come to visit anymore. And Buddha is just what's happening.

[21:52]

Either way, whether you make a carved dragon, you jump into the house of the real dragon, either way, the dragon comes to visit. Now, in the summer, as you know, the ceremony of Zazen is very often just one period in the morning and one period at night, except for optional opportunities. Because many people are so tired, they don't take advantage of it, then they're tired. said, sitting meditation has nothing to do with sitting. The sitting meditation of Buddha has nothing to do with sitting. Sitting, in the usual sense, is just a ceremony that celebrates the sitting of Buddha.

[22:58]

So no matter what posture you're in, standing, sitting, walking, or lying down throughout the day, you can practice sadhana. And you can do it from the point of view of you're doing it, or you can do it from the point of view of I'm intimate. I feel, beyond my feeling, intimate. with the working of the entire universe right here. And I trust that intimacy on my life, that intimacy with all beings. Standing, sitting, walking your line down, you can practice that way, which is not a practice you do. Or you can do a practice like that and do it completely and become free of the idea. In either case, it's a matter of total devotion to completely being yourself.

[24:12]

Completely being yourself as an independent person who does things, or completely be yourself which is the total concerted activity of the entire unit. Either way, they're really the same thing, but they sound different. Commonly, action is the activity, like raising your hand, or saying hi, talking, thinking, physical postures, or speaking. in terms of I'm an independent person, like I'm independent of you, and I'm doing this by my own energy. So it's the activity of a being, of a particular human, based on the idea of independent self. Beings who are free of that idea of independent self, they can also raise their hands and stuff and pull the earlobes and wave, talk, think.

[25:30]

But they don't understand it as their own personal action. They know that his arms and voice is coming, but the voice and arm gestures come up out of interdependence rather than by independent action. And that's not karma. If you act from the belief in self, then you live a life of consequences and not delusions. And that's the world of counter-continuation, which is more and more bondage to the world. You drive yourself deeper and deeper into the world of where you're isolated from other people, independent of other people and plants and animals and so on. And this is the world of misery, the world where you act out of interdependence, out of an understanding of interdependence. I say you act, but where action emerges from interdependence is a world of freedom, peace, and happiness. fearlessness, freedom from anxiety, wisdom and compassion, and so on.

[26:38]

Yeah, if you look at a Buddha, a Buddha can walk around often and stuff like that, but the Buddha does not believe that she's doing it by her own power. Who's talking to me about that? If a person walked right next to a Buddha and did exactly the same moves as a Buddha, talked the same words, same tone of voice, perfect imitation, but thought that she was doing it by her own power, she would be doing karma, and the Buddha would be expressing wisdom and compassion. But if that person would switch over, in fact, that person would be a Buddha. And their actions would no longer be karma. So, you can either switch right away, jump into the world beyond karma, which, of course, you have no way of doing or understanding of it. But just, the only way you can do that is just sort of wholeheartedly do it without any proof or any way of figuring it out.

[27:46]

No, you're not. But is it happening? Yes. It's always happening. Or you can stick with the world of karma. You can do it all the way to the end and you'll realize that it's just Illusion. But you have to do it all the way. You have to be ignorant and deluded all the way to the end of that to see that you can never do anything by yourself. You have to try. You have to do something by yourself so completely that you can't do it any more fully. And then you'll see that you don't do it by yourself. You can follow the way of karma all the way to the end, and jump off, and just switch right now to a life of intimacy with all beings. You give up the idea that you can do anything by yourself. Just forget about yourself, in other words, right now. Let's switch tonight. If you're not ready, you can do this other thing, and that will provide a transition over to the world of independence.

[28:48]

Okay? Hmm? You understand? You're still thinking. Well, do it all the way. Anything else? Yes? Yes. It's mysterious. It's a gift. And you gain that gift every moment. Congratulations. But you trust it. I trust it. Did I cut you off? Yeah. All right. And at the moment when you see effort happen, you see activity happen, at that time, you're not so sure where it's coming from.

[29:56]

If you're not sure, it's coming from you, even though it's so-called me. You see your hands raising up in the air. If you're not so sure, you're raising it. At that moment, You can't recognize the whole universe making this happen. This is too much. It's inconceivable how the whole universe raises its hand. Nobody can see this. And yet, you can understand it. You can see. And the way you understand it is you can see, I'm not doing this. I can't lift my hand up. Buddha cannot lift his hand up. Buddha cannot stand up or sit down or walk. He's incapable of doing anything. But Buddha's hand goes up like this. And Buddha sits up. And Buddha lifts her eyebrows up and down and blinks and talks. But Buddha cannot do that.

[30:57]

And Buddha knows, I can't do anything. Where does that come from, Buddha wonders? How does the speech come out of my mouth? It's a good time to check out where it's coming from. It can only be coming from everybody. You can't see that, but you can understand because you know you didn't do it. I know I'm not doing this talking. I'll tell you that. I know that. But maybe Liz is doing it. Maybe I'm Liz's puppet. She's a ventriloquist. Well, I don't think so. Not Liz. Maybe Jeremy. I don't think so. Maybe Liz and Jeremy. Maybe Liz and Jeremy. This is getting closer. Maybe all of you. And the entire world is causing this speech. That's what I think is true. And at a time when I really see that this is not my words coming out. I'm not doing this. And I don't get that I'm doing it.

[31:59]

I can't do anything. The whole world is giving me my life. Giving me my life as a talker and as a silent man. Giving me my silence. Giving me my stillness. Giving me my movement. How about that? How about living? How about thank you very much for my life? Say you're welcome. How come you didn't say you're welcome? Are you resisting me? Don't you want to admit that you're giving me my life? I'll say it one more time. Thank you. Thank you. I'm not... I don't mean to scare you or threaten you. I really don't. But... I'm about 54. And the situation was about... lower than me.

[33:01]

He started telling people, you know, I'm not going to be around forever. So I'm not going to be around later. So clean. Get with the program soon. Give yourself completeness to a way that directly indicates the Buddha physically. Because I'm not going to be around for too long. I'm going to Japan tomorrow morning, and my airplane might crash. But please, do me a favor and complain and start practicing. Every moment of the day. Please. Okay? Anyone have a problem with that? Good. But, you know, I have to wake up for a bit of time.

[34:03]

Did you have a question over there? Somebody? Yes? If you're a Buddha, you can't raise your hand. No. If you're a Buddha, you think you can raise your hand. If you're not a Buddha, you think you can raise your hand. Thinking that I can raise my hand is called, you know, a deluded being. Okay? Buddha allows that. As a matter of fact, Buddha loves deluded beings. But to think that I can raise my hand in delusion and for the hand to raise up and knowing that I'm not doing it is Buddha. What? Confusing? Well, that's reasonable. Tell me what you think. Tell me what wouldn't be confusing. OK.

[35:09]

What wouldn't be confusing? Yes. So what's the theory? No, no. OK, so here's the thing, not the theory straight. That when you can't raise your hand, when you realize that you cannot raise your hand by your own power, the theory is that you'll be Buddha. So when you get to the point where you realize that when your hand goes up, you don't raise it, at that time, I'm telling you, the theory says you will be a Buddha. When you get to the point where your hand goes up and down, your mouth opens and shuts, your voice comes out of your mouth, when that happens not by your power and you don't do that, I'm telling you, you will be totally happy, totally compassionate, totally wise, free, and just a Buddha.

[36:17]

That's the theory. So when that happens, And tell me if that's not Buddha. Okay, good. The other part is, if you raise your hand by your own power, by that power script, you're stuck in being an ordinary, limited person, and you'll suffer. That's the other part of it. So you can test that right now. Okay, so what's the conclusion? Sounds like both... You mean it's a problem that you're still suffering? Yeah, it is a problem. And what I'm saying to you is, if you will completely put yourself into, this is not easy, this life of where you lift your hand by your own power and completely feel that pain and anxiety of that kind of life, which we all feel when we live that, Okay? Are you following this so far? Completely devote yourself to admitting what it's like to be a person who thinks he can do things on his own.

[37:19]

You also have to completely feel the pain of living that way. If you do that completely, you will leap beyond that world and enter the world where you can't do anything and where everything happens through you by virtue of all beings in the name of Buddha. Okay? Right, exactly. And we believe it's a reality that we can raise our hand. That's it. That's the point. It isn't just that it seems like you can raise your hand. Okay? If there's a Buddha could see that it seems like he could raise his hand. Okay? If that you believe, we, you and I, all of us people believe it. We think it's a reality. That's the problem. You're right. That's why just kind of like a show.

[38:22]

Like if you did a magic trick. Okay? You did some magic trick where you kind of created an illusion. You wouldn't believe it. You're just not with the illusion. Right? Not a reality. The problem is we think it's a reality that we can act by our own power. And whatever we think is a reality is a delusion. Because Buddhists know that whatever they think is not a reality. It's just a thought. Nobody can think a reality. There is cause and effect. The cause of the pain is the belief in independent action of suffering and bondage. That's the cause. The effect is suffering and bondage. Buddhism is all about cause and effect. cause of bondage and pain is belief in independent existence. Matter of fact, this is great because you could say suffering, the cause and effect of suffering is that you don't actually believe in cause and effect.

[39:27]

You don't believe in causation, you believe in the reality of yourself. Not that you're caused, but that you're an independently existing thing. You forget about causation when it comes to yourself. You think you're thoughts are a reality rather than just something which is conjured up by causative condition. So causation, if you study causation, you will realize that there is no independent action. And so if you study causation, you study how thinking that there is independent action causes suffering. Watch that causation and you'll see all you need to see. But you have to do it wholeheartedly. which means that that's the highest priority in your life. But it's really worth it, because it will set you free and help all believe. Anybody got a problem? I think you better come live at the Lent Center. I'll work on you. You'll get it.

[40:31]

Everybody else does, right? Well, maybe 20 years. Does Buddha feel responsible? No. Buddha does not feel responsible. But Buddha, even though Buddha doesn't feel responsible, Buddha responds to all beings. Buddha is totally devoted to all beings that doesn't feel responsible. Feeling responsible is based on sense of self. But if you have a sense of self and you're acting from there, you must take responsibility for your belief. Buddhists are those who are not doing anything for their own power, so they're not responsible for anything. They are the enactment, not of irresponsibility, but of pure responsiveness. They're nothing but response.

[41:32]

All of us are nothing but response. We are just. the response to all things. Each person at each place in the universe is the response to all things. Each one of you is the response to all things all day long. But you're not responsible for that. You're a total gift of the universe. The universe is responsible. And the universe is happy with you, which is what you would say thank you. I know you're shy, so you don't want to say thank you, but you really should. It would be good for you. Thank you, universe. Thank you for giving me life moment after moment. And Zazen practice is to sit there, to sit still and say, okay, I'm just going to sit down here and say thank you to the universe for life. Thank you for this life. Thank you for this life. Thank you for this life.

[42:35]

Let it now be given back to all beings who gave it to me. Let me be me. Weird, huh? We have another question? Go ahead. Pardon? Yeah, she got two. Everybody gets two. What? Me too. That's right. It's our mortality that's causing suffering? That's what you think? Well, this realm, though, is mind determined. You've gotten this realm by your mind.

[43:38]

Pardon? You're born and probably you'll die, right? And so you're saying that the main problem is you're going to die? What's the problem? That you're born? You're right. Suffering comes from being born. You're right. Suffering comes from being born and dying. That's how it comes. But it comes not just from being born and dying, but being born and then thinking that you're independent from birth. That, we call, is the suffering that Buddha is trying to keep you free of. So she said she feels trapped, or she feels some conflict, because I suggested she be totally herself, but part of herself, which means she can't accept herself completely, all of herself.

[44:44]

And part of herself is it wants to change or not be the way she is. So in other words, you have to accept that you have a mind which has conflict in it. The kind of person you are is that you're like the rest of the people. Everybody has one part which says, OK, this part's going to be OK, and this part's not OK. And I should take the part that's not OK and get rid of it or fix it up or something. You can accept that you're a person who has a dynamic mind which has lots of conflict in it. who has a lot of conflict, which means it's difficult to be a person without conflict. We'd rather be a person who has a mind which is all homogenized with no conflict, right? Wouldn't that be easier? Huh? Seems like it? It might, but that's not the way people are. People's minds have conflicts in them because they're supposed to be two kinds of people. They think they're supposed to be, like, unselfish and kind and Buddha, and they think they're supposed to be, you know, also selfish and, you know,

[45:49]

self-centered and independent. So we have this complex in our mind. That's the kind of mind we have. We need to become intimate with that mind. And when you're getting intimate, you have done what I'm suggesting. You have become intimate with yourself. You are totally yourself. And at that point, you will become Buddha. Is that hard? Yes. Why is it hard? Because you think you don't have to do it. You think you can sort of being yourself. And nothing is more difficult than being yourself. Now, if somebody told you, OK, if you're yourself, we'll pay you a lot of money or something, maybe you'd try it. But all you're going to get is freedom out of this. So how's it going, Kendra? Can't see you very well. Does that make sense? Right.

[46:59]

Right. Yeah. No, it's not that you're not supposed to want to change, okay, because that's the way you are. You're not supposed to be different from who you are. has carefully created you just like you are. You're perfect. You're not supposed to be different. You are changing all the time. You're not supposed to be different from the person who's changing all the time. And the way people are is that most people, especially people who notice their suffering and see some reasons why they're suffering, would like to change and stop being the way they are that's causing suffering. But you can't stop being the way you are. Ever. However, if you completely change the way you are, you're immediately liberated from the way you are without even stopping being the way you are. The way you are right now, without changing anything, is itself Buddha.

[48:12]

Including if you want to change. Think of that, Kangaroo. Yes. Yes. Yes. That would be the way to be if you want to become free of that kind of thing. You're welcome. Good luck. Yes? What creates the idea of the separate self and the purpose of it? What creates? I mean, what's the causation of separate self? Human evolution, I would say. What was the second question? What's purpose? It's purpose, I would say, is transmission of genetic continuity.

[49:25]

If you take a complex society, like human society, and you have some people in the group that have an idea of self and others who don't, the ones who have the idea of self will reproduce more effectively. They'll create more inventions. They'll take over the group. The idea of self is self-promoting. So it has happened that human beings have taken over the planet because of a powerful thing, a powerful delusion called self. And they promoted that idea. The drawback is it causes all kinds of war and conflict and fear and anxiety and, you know, the whole smear of suffering. We can't go back and construct our evolution. We have to understand this person. And if we understand this person who is built on selfishness and rewarded for being selfish, we are rewarded for being selfish.

[50:34]

And we are rewarded for hiding our selfishness, to selfishly pretend like we're not selfish. People like people who aren't selfish. So if you're selfish, it would be better if you don't tell people you're selfish. And whenever they're looking, act unselfish. And if you've got a self, you'll be more effective at pretending that you're not selfish. Unselfish people don't kind of look unselfish. Unselfish people could act in such a way that they look selfish, like an unselfish gorilla. You go see a gorilla, what does it do? It says, give me your purse. What do you got to eat there? A Zen master will do that too. Oh, you have a purse? Oh, you got a barrette in there? Can I wear the barrette? But you don't have any hair. Oh, sorry. But people would say, oh, a selfish gorilla, a selfish Zen master, he wants to get the barrette and the purse and the cookies for himself.

[51:37]

So if he got a self, then you could say, oh, now, how can I look unselfish? Oh, welcome. Oh, you have a nice purse there. It's nice. Where did you get it? I don't want your purse. Here, take my purse. Oh, you're very unselfish. No, you're really great. Here, take my purse. Thank you. Self is a thing that human beings are created to develop and protect their own individuality, their own animal survival. And it turns out it has created an amazing thing called a human being who can be a Buddha. by understanding what a human being is, not by trying to not be a human being. Shakyamuni Buddha was a human being. He had a self. He suffered. He understood that. He became free and became a great teacher to find out what you are and become free of it.

[52:43]

So you could say the human self was created for the reasons I said, but also in order to make Buddhists. Humans make very good Buddhists. I'm not saying the best. I'm not saying the best. There may be Buddhists on other planets that aren't human that are just as good. We make very good Buddhists because we really have to understand a very complex, tricky situation of our self-interest. What do you think? Yes? You mean on the ceremony? The ceremony of sitting? Yeah, be careful. Don't... Yes. But the whole Eightfold Path is contained in sitting. Okay? But the whole Eightfold Path is also contained in walking and lying down and cooking and sleeping and jump rope.

[53:52]

It contains everything, all activities. in their independence. You can put too much... Yes, got to be careful. But if you're putting too much emphasis, you should understand and thoroughly put too much emphasis so you can realize that it's an illusion if you put too much emphasis. You can never put too much emphasis. But the universe can use you to put too much emphasis and you realize that you won't be putting too much emphasis. So whatever you're doing, you can use that as an opportunity, no matter what. Yes? You have a nurse office question? Well, welcome. You have an illusion that you're quite happy? No.

[54:53]

yes yes yeah maybe a little pretty good yes I think I It's just that you think that. I'm not saying you're wrong or right, but you do feel that way. And you look pretty good to me too. You don't look that bad. Most people in this room are pretty healthy. They are sitting up late at night. You're a pretty healthy group. So you're pretty happy people. Now some of you were totally miserable, but right now you look pretty happy. That's fine. that you feel that way? Pretty happy?

[56:02]

What's the problem? He has a little bit of pain, right? But he's okay with it. So what's the problem? Am I trying to blow his pain up Why can't I just leave him alone and let him be sort of okay with a little bit of fainting? Huh? Well, I'll tell you. The reason is that when you understand, and when I understand a little bit about what you can be or how you can live, then it's okay with this pain that you have and it's okay with the pain that I have. is extreme agony compared to what life can be like. It's not okay at that point. Because you are missing the opportunity to be a person who's not just okay with his own suffering, but who can embrace fearlessly all beings with great compassion and wisdom.

[57:12]

And compared to that life, this life of being okay with my suffering right now, is a tight, unhappy, frightened, selfish, petty, miserable existence. And not only that, but it's going to get worse. Your pain that you have now is not going to stay like this. You're going to get really sick pretty soon. You're going to get Alzheimer's. And then at that point, it's going to be very hard to get Alzheimer's. You're going to have strokes. All kinds of difficult things are coming to us pretty soon. What a big wave is coming, which is going to come crashing down on us. We're going to have heart problems, and cancer. And even if we don't, our close friends are coming. And then you still might be OK with it. OK, you still might be OK with it, which is fine. But I'm talking about not just being OK with your suffering. I'm talking about being able to be tremendously compassionate

[58:17]

whether you're greatly suffering or minorly suffering. I'm talking about the freedom from all this, which is an inconceivable joy in view, and which can help you cope with huge, overwhelming misery, physical deterioration, mental deterioration, and tremendous suffering around you, which you can help because you overcome your selfishness We sometimes feel incredibly frightened and terrible when we're confronted with certain situations which push our selfishness. Right now, here we are sitting, it's not that bad. You're coming over to us and asking us for a kidney. But what are you going to do if your wife or daughter asks you for a kidney? What are you going to do? How are you going to respond? Is this going to be another joyful moment of life?

[59:18]

Or is this something you're going to be okay with? Kind of like, well, you know, I'm sorry, I'm not going to give it to you, but I'm okay with that. So anyway, it's okay that you're okay. It's good to be okay, and I'm glad you're okay with it. But this is not your full potential, my friend. You can be much better at being than just somebody who's okay with his present minor pain. You can understand that your pain is actually infinite. And you can need it and embrace it and become intimate with it. That's your potential. People are Buddhas. We are not ever happy until we realize Buddhahood. And I will never be happy until all beings realize Buddhahood. And you won't either. You'll always be bothered. No matter how happy you get, you'll always be bothered until all beings realize Buddhahood. Now, it's okay. You can be okay with that. That's okay. But not too okay. We're not okay with it.

[60:19]

Three? Oh, my God. What time is it? Getting late. No. Feeling the pain of others is not compassion. Feeling the pain of others, I think, is impossible. But when someone is suffering, if you feel pain looking at them, that's what I would call empathy. Empathy is connected to compassion. But compassion is not just being empathic. Okay? So number one, I say you don't feel other people suffering. I don't think you feel my suffering. Riving in pain, you might be sympathetic to me and feel empathy for me and feel pain seeing me suffering. That's not compassion. But that's related to compassion. Once you see me suffering and you feel pain seeing me suffering, compassion is not just feeling pain seeing me suffering, but it's also your happiness is undermined by my suffering.

[61:26]

It's dented and limited by my suffering. You feel that realizing your full potential requires me to be happy. This is starting to be compassion. And compassion is more than that, though. You want me to be free of suffering. And great compassion is that you not only are undermined, not only is your happiness limited by my unhappiness, not only do you want me to be free, but you will give your whole life to help me be free. That's great compassion. That's the way I understand great compassion. What do you think? If you're so concerned that you feel severely pained and grateful, what can you do? When you feel your pain, whatever level you feel it, embrace it. The more you settle with your pain, the more it grows. The wider it gets, the bigger it gets.

[62:28]

Until you realize your pain is infinite. And you're not running away from that either. Then you're set. Then you're not afraid anymore. Then you can face your life. Good thing. That's good. Good breathing. One of the main things you have to do. Keep breathing through this process. And you'll get there. I appreciate your enthusiasm for all these questions, but some people want to go to bed, right? So I think we have to stop. But if you want to, I'll talk to you afterwards. give that man an escort over to my house. So now, since it's late, it's kind of late to recite this. I'll just do it from the high points. The way is basically perfect and all-pervading.

[63:32]

How could it be contingent upon practice and realization? The Dharma vehicle is free and untrammeled. What need is Effort. Indeed, the whole body is beyond the world's dust. Who could believe in a means to brush it clean? It is never apart from one right where one is. What is the use of going off here and there to practice? And yet, there is the slightest discrepancy. The way is as distant as heaven from earth. If the slightest like or dislike arises, the mind is lost in confusion. You must give up the slightest like or dislike. In other words, we must completely accept what's happening.

[64:34]

And all likes and dislikes, accept them too. not getting entangled in it. Then you can realize the way it's pervading through you constantly. There are more high points, but I think I'll stop. Is that okay? Hmm? You can come and just say it. Sorry, I'm not surveying from yelling at you. I wasn't really yelling at you, was I? I was just yelling. I didn't mean it to be at you. Although I didn't always have kept you awake, I was doing it. So I'll see you soon. I'll come back and talk with you about April pack. And in the meantime, please keep

[65:36]

totally in yourself, multi-moment, as you come into being. Why don't you answer me when I ask you a question? Is that too hard? Do you feel coerced? It's OK to feel coerced. Just say so. But I can't tell if you don't say anything whether you feel cursed or you didn't hear me or you're scared or what. I need some help here. I'm not doing this by myself.

[66:16]

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