but of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. Amen. Pour into us, Lord, your Spirit of love. And as you have gathered us here together, so by your goodness make us agree among ourselves. We make this prayer through Christ our Lord. I don't necessarily mean by that that I want you to agree with me in everything that I say, but it's agreement in the Lord. I'll tell you later, Father. Well, this morning, taking as our text, bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. And looking at that opening section of the paper of Alan Rees' The Community is a Place of Healing, we touched on isolation within the community, the politely superficial level of living,

[01:25]

that can exist within community life, a concern from the sidelines that does not want to get too involved, and then after sharing Alan Reece's personal insight to his experience of acute anxiety within his community, the healing that he discovered and that took place by the acceptance that he found when he openly unburdened himself. And this evening, I'd like to perhaps take this a step further. I came across recently a paper on submission, where the theme was community is submission.

[02:32]

But the paper started out by saying that man is capable of great self-deception at times We can fail to discern disaster ahead and keep going forward with great sincerity. And the author quoted Jeremiah chapter 17. The heart is more devious than any other thing. Perverse too, who can pierce its secrets. Or as my translation has it, the international version, who can understand it.

[03:37]

Now by themselves, these are rather blunt words. But the author of this paper did not simply leave it there. He went on to say, for the Christian who lives by the word of God, this need not be so, since God has told us how to free ourselves from this danger from this self-deception and he quotes Matthew chapter 18 verse 20 for where two or three meet in my name I shall be there with them. Now when we look at the

[04:47]

Acts of the Apostles, especially in chapter two, we have a portrayal of that ideal community having all things in common, meeting to celebrate their faith in the risen Lord through prayer, through sacrament, and through mutual love. And again, our blessed Lord, in that last and very wonderful discourse to his apostles before his Passion, emphasised that unity within his elected community, those chosen ones, was to be his prayer and the sign of his continued witness to the world.

[06:00]

With me in them and you in me, may they be so completely one that the world will realize that it was you who sent me." Yes, the unity he was speaking about there was something that he wanted to be real. The trust that he wanted the disciples, the apostles to have within their grouping was to be real. And this aspect of unity and trust are essential elements for that prayer, that sacrament, and that mutual love, if it is to be really effective. You see, it's not natural for a person

[07:14]

to submit to someone or something that he does not trust. We may submit by conforming behavior, but it will not be real submission, submission of the heart, unless we can experience real trust in one another. And for this reason, what may look like Christian or monastic obedience can often become nothing more than behavioral conformity. Whether we're running a business out in the world or whether we're living in a committed life as monks, subject to a democratic election of the spiritual father of the community, the head of the business or the superior of a monastery

[08:42]

is not going to be able to implement good ideals if they have not got the backing of those in the firm or in the community, that is, in the monastery. In any group discussion that we may have, clear communication about the obvious agenda will depend on the quality of the hidden agenda. I'm saying that whether in business or in community life. And what I'm really trying to emphasize a little bit here is that we're not so extraordinary as monks by grouping ourselves together in a common effort, a common purpose, a common belief, and trying to do something about it.

[09:50]

Often what we're trying to do within our monastic structures are also just as important to, if you like, worldly success outside. For us, we don't talk about success or ambition. We're talking about just service. I remember an army officer getting married at Dowie and he asked when he discovered I was the sub-prior. He says, when will you get your next promotion? He thought it was naturally something that would happen after I'd been there so many years. And he was quite sort of amazed when I said, well, I might not get promoted. We don't have promotion. But when we're talking about this hidden agenda in our group of working together for the good of the community, for the good of ourselves, I mean all those thoughts and feelings

[11:08]

which are below the surface in any given group. Each of these adds something to the degree of mistrust present in the group and together we know from experience they lead to lack of good communication at any given discussion. If we really desire to get this right within the monastic community, we must, as a community, grow in deeper trust of one another. And any community which is truly searching for God's will, must find one another.

[12:12]

Now, as monks, as a community, we do meet together often to celebrate our faith in the risen Lord. We meet in prayer. and in sacrament. In fact, if you were to discover a monastery that didn't meet in prayer and in sacrament, you'd start questioning whether it was a monastery at all as an outsider. But if there is a great deal missing in the mutual love aspect within that community, which often outsiders do not see, their first encounter or maybe for a long encounter but if we if there is not that mutual love aspect then perhaps I think as a community we need to take stock of our prayer and sacrament as well as with regard to our mutual love.

[13:28]

I remember In the 60s, I think it was, there was a great American writer. I think he was just an ordinary parish priest, Leo Trez, who used to churn out books for priests and meditations and things. I don't know if any of you remember them. But I remember one there where he reverted to a priest In the old days, when you said, I will go on to the altar of God, to God who gives joy to my youth. And he described how this parish priest could go to the altar steps each day and recite that psalm and say mass, and then go back into the presbytery, the rectory, and never talk to his curate. Just ignore him. And he was questioning how this could possibly go on.

[14:32]

How could this man do this day after day? Now I'm not even hinting that that is going on here. But I'm saying here's an aspect of our spiritual life. our prayer life and our sacrament, which should be tied in with the mutual love aspect of community life. In fact, we might say, what are we after then? Living a monastic life at all? There is a a little liturgical quotation on Maundy Thursday, Ubi caritas et amor, Deus ibi est. Told it used to be a toast of the monks of Orycno, I think, on Lake Constance and was started in the 9th century.

[15:39]

and they used to give it to themselves over a toast of wine in the refectory. But how true it is, where there is love, there is God. And there is no doubt that it is essential to our living to develop this power and sense of love so that one can go out to others in a similar way. If we haven't got it within our family, we're certainly not going to be able to give it to anyone who turns to us for help and to discover that love. Putting it in simple terms, one has got to be able to know love and have experienced love in order to give love.

[16:48]

Monasticism, if you remember, when I started out of my first talk to you on Monday evening, I said as a way of life has its own strength and consistency. and at best can only embody and stabilize the experience of living. And by faith, we know that life, life, whether in a monastery or outside of monastery, is to know, love, and serve God. These three must be present, whether we're in a monastery or outside a monastery, if we're going to discover in faith the real meaning of life. That very simple second answer that was in all those catechisms for generations, to know, to love and to serve.

[18:03]

And the strength and consistency is the realization that for me it is within a monastery that I'm going to best to get to know God, to love God and to serve God. That, the loving aspect which we have been talking about will only come about when my love for God is shown also by my love for my neighbor. How can you love the God you cannot see if you cannot love the neighbor you can see? I do feel, having said all this, it is important to realize that it doesn't happen overnight.

[19:05]

I don't think I'm so stupid to think that you become a perfect monk by putting on the habit. Although there is this funny aspect, isn't there, in monastic life, that when a new person joins us as a novice, we expect them to be perfect from the start. You know how critical we are of any new novice. He doesn't do this and doesn't do that. And yet, as we get older, we think, oh well, we've been through the bishop, we've been through the juniorate, we can relax a little bit. Whereas our perfection should be getting greater as the longer we are in the monastic life. But I don't, for a moment, expect monks to be perfect. And I hope that they don't expect me to be too perfect either. But we've got to realize in our monastic life, if we're going to be dedicated to it, that this is something that is going to happen.

[20:17]

There must be an inner conviction that is something that we want. But it has got to happen in some way in order for my very personality to mature and develop. One aspect of the monastic life which I think linked with this whole question of living and mutual love and prayer and living out the sacrament is the whole question of renunciation. Geoffrey Lynch, some years ago in a series of talks where he was one of the main speakers, he's an ample fourth monk, said to a group of novice masters and mistresses, any choice that man makes deprives him of certain harmonics

[21:24]

living experience. Every plenitude is only achieved by the death of a something. And in a sense, this is the way in which the paschal mystery passes into every man's destiny. Tillard enlarges on this in the Gospel Path, a book that he brought out. But having made our choice, having realised that renunciation of some aspect is going to be part of our lives as monks, don't let us be constantly looking back over our shoulders. I think this is one of the scourges of the whole of this modern age, perhaps because life moves so fast, that the grass always seems to be greener on the other side.

[22:39]

It's a lovely sort of Irishism that, isn't it? Ah, the grass is greener on the other side. And this seems to be so much part of people's life. They go into things quickly and they get out of things quickly. And I think part of our monastic dedication is not to be constantly looking over our shoulders. In Philippians chapter 2, we find these words, if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, in any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, there's our unity, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose, mutual love and unity again,

[23:54]

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. There is the renunciation. And being my first evening here, I wasn't listening completely with both ears, but it did strike me the night before last, the passage where St. John of the Cross was being mentioned. I just thought about it today, thinking, yes, that also was linked with what I've been trying to say. And I looked at that tonight. And that passage from the Ascent, where the writer says, we know John of the Cross' advice. Strive always to prefer Not that which is easiest, but that which is most difficult.

[24:59]

Not that which is most delectable, but that which is most unpleasing. Not that which gives most pleasure, but rather that which gives least. Strive thus to desire, to enter into complete detachment and emptiness and poverty with respect to everything that is in the world for Christ's sake. John of the Cross, by his own life, gave us a wonderful example, one which most certainly very few of us are brave enough to follow. I mean his early spiritual life, the rough treatment he got, his dark night of the soul and all that he suffered mentally and spiritually, his own personal growth. It is something that people can aspire to but most of us I think are a little frightened and hope that it doesn't come too much our way.

[26:11]

But nevertheless what he says can touch us. And I think that despite all his so-called detachment in his search for the really real, what is wonderful that in that particular passage in the Ascent, he says respect to everything that is in the world for Christ's sake. Although he was searching for God, he still loved all that God had created. Now that really is the end of my talk this evening to you. I hope tomorrow I would like to develop just two themes. One about the suffering that does come into our lives and, you know, is it essential and how do we cope with it

[27:16]

And then also what I would call the maturity that should be part of our monastic life. And linking that with a maturity that can also be discovered by people out in the world and which is expected. But how do we discover that and link it to our monastic life? When I heard that, I was thinking of Saint John the Cross, and he came to me and said, This is how the 1950s spirituality, you know, with the accent of, the more you suffer, the older you are. And I never put it as well as that, because it sounds so much masochism.

[28:23]

I remember I told my novice master, he had put me in a factory, It was a very routine job, you know, and I enjoyed it because, you know, I didn't have to every day, you know, just to be creative or work. And anyway, I was working with an old brother. And he asked me how I was doing, and I said I enjoyed it very much, because I said, you know, I'm working with this old brother, and your brother's mind was kind of flinting a little bit. But, you know, I had great respect for his old age. the next week I was in the print shop for five years. And it was not the main reason. But it seems that whenever somebody was doing something that he could enjoy, that was actually almost bad.

[29:27]

Do you know, I think that was, there's two things, that was part It was a spillover to some way from the whole Victorian era, how people were brought up and disciplined in the family. It was completely different, you know, that even sons and daughters had their, very often had their spouses selected for them and told who they were going to marry and they seemed to have, they stayed together. They were often unfaithful on the sly, but at least they didn't divorce and they stayed together as families. And, you know, it was very much part of the life, accepted. But I think that myself, I've linked this very, very much to the pharisaical living out of life that our Lord seemed to condemn so much, where

[30:31]

the rules and regulations and how you observe them, which he was constantly at the Scribes and Pharisees about, making life oppressive for the normal Jew. And he gave this wonderful relaxed aspect of what real life was about. And I think that this is what the Church has highlighted in many ways. It's saying, let us think, what are we doing? What were we doing? Why were we doing it? Let's get back to basics, to the teaching of Christ. And I think at the Abbots workshop this year, this was the message that I got from that short, yet apparently very positive synod that was had. That there was, you know, You've read it in the papers, you've seen it in articles, the sort of thing that Vatican II turned the church upside down and overboard.

[31:36]

But I don't think so. I think that there is a much deeper search for spiritual meaning in many, many lay people's lives. In fact, that's one of the things that was said to us. which is flowering. Of course, you know, there are problems, but there has been in every age of the church. What about modernism? What about the Reformation? What about Pelagianism? You know, every era has its problems. And we've certainly got them today. And society corrodes and has invaded, you know, the family life has disappeared, you know, what's the one in three marriages, I think, in this country are doomed for divorce, separation. One in two.

[32:37]

I think it's one in three in England. They're always behind you. But, you know, those are big problems which, again, I think the Church is trying to face up to. But I do link the, if you like, the change in that disciplinary attitude. You know, you weren't allowed to have a friend in the monastery. If two monks were seen getting on too well together, they most likely split up, even if they were doing a great job. you know, if it was a bursar and assistant bursar or two housemasters, oh no, they're becoming a clique. And it might have been nothing more than friendship. Those sort of things that went on, well, to me, that is inhuman. It's immature. It's behaving like a lot of I was going to say women, but that's the wrong term to use nowadays.

[33:41]

But you know what I mean. You wouldn't see that expression, down at the cross, fostering that. I think that's what will appear. Yeah, no, no. I think that's, it's an inner, it's an inner spirit he's reverting to. I mean, you don't have to go sort of searching for humiliations or thinking, you know, I'm a worm and no man and throwing your head down looking almost miserable. So everyone says, well, does he look so humble? I think John the cross is making it internal. You know, rather like the whole aspect of Lent, you know, that we're told, you know, if you're going to fast, don't let people know you're fasting. That's the real spirituality. And there are enough of those hurts that come along, which it's very hard not to show.

[34:44]

The way the text can come out, he sounds so external. I didn't read it like that. It's strange. You're talking about personal choices. Yeah. All of those. Yeah. Yes. You're not imposing that on other people. No. Yes. But again, you don't have to. It's a personal choice. Not so much that you go around selecting it. It's when it comes your way, you accept it. So when I, yeah, you see, when I was asked to be assistant bursar, I'd been ordained, just ordained a priest. I was due to go to Oxford to read history and then Father Anthony Barron died on Christmas Eve and by January the 6th I'd been asked to be assistant bursar. So I had to come out of the school where I was teaching and the abbot said well this will mean

[35:48]

You won't be able to go to Oxford now, but we need this post. Now, the first task that was given to me in the Bursar's office was to unpack and stack the cigarette ration, cigarette ration, and put it in a cupboard. And I remember taking these packets out and putting them in the cupboard, saying, bloody hell, this isn't what I was ordained for. You see? Now, I realize now, looking back, That was completely unmonastic. I got it all wrong. Okay, you know, I'm human and everything else, but it shouldn't have been a matter of what I was doing if I was serving the monastery and doing what the abbot genuinely thought that I needed to be. Now the strange thing is, I didn't know then, despite all my unacceptance of it, that a whole new world was going to open up for me. Because within two weeks, the abbot said to him, as you're not teaching in the school, I'd like you to be chaplain to this girl's finishing school and I'd like you to help Father Oswald on the parish as he's getting old.

[37:01]

And a whole pastoral world really for 23 years opened up for me, which I had no idea of. And if I'd, you know, now when you hear housemasters saying, God, I wish I could get off this job, it's just a bore. Boys, boys, boys, they're around you day and night, you know. And I realize what a fantastic life I've had. Twelve years officiating naval chaplain, you know. involved in the diocese, on the Church Unity Commission, tribunal judge. Now, those things wouldn't have happened, and I reckon even been sent to America. Because again, another step, which I fought like mad the first time, but the second time gave in, when I was made novice master, having to come off the parish, which I had got attached to. And the abbot

[38:03]

very, very cleverly just said to me, Leonard, make sure now, won't you, the parishioners are worshipping God and not worshipping you. And in fact, you know, it's lovely in the parochial scene, if any of you have been involved, you know, people are so grateful to you for all that you do for them, that it can become personal adulation, you know, you lose sight of what you're doing for them. And then I was just beginning to settle down as a novice master and think, you know, this is not a bad life. You're sort of beginning to read again and get back to reality. And I was fired out here, you know. I've been sent to the colonies. Then the dark night begins, yes. So, no, I think... John of the Cross is saying, really, well, although they're personal, you don't have to go searching for them, but when they come, don't be like Leonard, try and accept them like he says.

[39:12]

I always get it second time round, you see, I begin to understand. I never get it first time round. again, negatively, but what life is all about is it's difficult to choose something out of love of Christ, and choose something because you think you're going to have some idealistic result, and you're doomed. It's a different thing, so that somebody who's able to choose something out of love for anyone, really as a person, whether it's love for a goal or something, is acknowledging a different state than somebody who's not. And so, and then again, I think, you know, as we mentioned, it's not for me to say what you should be doing, you know, at a certain point, at a certain point it has to be your own inner desire to do that, and there's bounds of prudence and so on and so forth.

[40:23]

And at a certain point when you, you know, to be looking for what's always the best for me, At a certain point, you have to do that, but after a certain point, that's the last thing you need to do. And you'll be doing it anyway, but it should no longer be your aim, because you should realize there's something beyond you. It's even better for you if you are beyond yourself in that way, while you're looking for your own happiness. But anyway, I think that's another factor that we put down the cross. It's almost as if she's talking about I mean, for a person that's similar to Ignatius with his first and second weeks, you know, you don't treat the people the same way. In fact, apparently he wouldn't even want most of his Jesuits giving retreats. That is, he didn't think they were capable of it, because they hadn't gotten into the first week till long past. And I think about that with religious life. We slap these things on either ourselves or others when they're not capable of receiving it.

[41:25]

And then what you get is this conformity rather than a real surrender or change of heart. They're all great conformists and what's expected of us, but there's no inner fire which is, you know, God. And then it's true that we really you know, wind-up meditation, but that's for ourselves. And next time I'm going to do the more difficult thing, but today, it's a little tired, it's kind of cloudy, but, you know, I'm just saying, this is what's kind of coming to me. I think I agree with that, but I also think there's a whole area here for us in our own personal growth. The realization of this master-disciple relationship. That people are going to turn to us because we are monks and look on us to be their masters.

[42:25]

But we are not going to be able to give that direction or be real masters unless we have been true disciples ourselves. And that means that we are under the master. I mean, we put ourselves under a superior, but do we really put ourselves under a superior these days? Do we question all the time? Let's get that balance right, because there is a terrific search going outside, you know, the guru aspect. People are looking for men of prayer to guide them. and give them help. But we won't be able to do it unless we've got it ourselves. And that, it is hard. You know, it's time-consuming. Prayer is not something that's easy. Listening alone, you know, how many of us can remember in detail what the scripture readings are about this morning, you know, and all the scripture we've learned from Romans and Vespers even.

[43:33]

There's a terrific amount of growth needs to go on and how we listen to God speaking to us. And I think, I'm not saying you're not and I am, I think we're all in this. It's a whole new ballgame for monastic life that is coming back of what monks really should be doing. And I think, you know, I find your office here very prayerful. Very uplifting, because you're encouraged to listen. I think you ought to be grateful for that amongst yourselves, of what you've done. I'd love to pinch the harpist and the guitarist and transport you down to St Anselm's, you know, for a fortnight. Not that I think we're not doing it there. I mean, people come to us and say, your liturgy is wonderful. Within often, within a community, we're always saying, oh gosh, it's so, you know, weak or drags or whatever.

[44:39]

And yet I can tell you coming here, you've uplifted me. And people come to St. Anselm's and they say, oh, it's marvellous. But there we're saying, oh, it's awful, you know. We need to do something about it. So, you know, be encouraged often of what is happening But go on, especially on that, what I'd call your liturgical side, because I think it's the baseline. As I said, if that's wrong, then the mutual love is wrong. We won't get that right. I have one question. You commented that Looking back over one's shoulder, it's a curse of modern age. It's a vice to which I'm terribly proud. Well, you're a young man, you see. Do you really think that's more of a problem now than it was in years past?

[45:39]

Yes. Do you have any idea why that is? Because the pace of life that people move around, firms move people, You know, turn of the century, you joined a firm, most people stayed with a firm for the rest of their life, just worked their way through. You know, my great-grandfather, my grandfather and my father were all in the firm, started at the bottom, they were made to. And same firm. And this was very common. People didn't move out of towns and villages to the same extent now. But, you know, modern business also causes this. You know, it's destructive. A man has got his children settled in a school and they're just coming up to exam periods or something, a very important stage in their life, and a firm says to a man, you've got to move from over to California or somewhere.

[46:45]

And it's that or redundancy. And so everything has to be pulled up and people moved off. And I think this is what's caused it. And the whole push, pace, But the success story, especially in America, which you're sort of well known for, you know, get on, makes people constantly look to see if they can better themselves as so-called. But it doesn't necessarily bring happiness. So I don't know, How you correct it apart from... Because it's the seeds being sown. Years ago there was a black athlete named Satchel Paige who had a great career in the black baseball league.

[47:48]

Finally got him, when he integrated baseball, he got him to the American National League for the Dodgers. He used to use the expression, don't look back, you may find somebody gaining on you. I mentioned that, I immediately thought of this fellow. The idea is looking forward. We'll imprison you here, Nathan. We won't let you go. Just say it's temptations. Put you in a cell like John on the cross till you get over it. Good. Glory be to the Father. and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit, as it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be, world without end.

[48:57]

Amen.

[48:58]

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