May we extend this mind over the whole universe so that we and all beings may attain maturity in Buddha's wisdom. Welcome Great Assembly. At the beginning of the intensive, I surveyed the Great Assembly and said everybody's name. However, I found out later that when I said the people's names, you couldn't necessarily see who I was addressing. So that doesn't work so well, but if you just give me a moment, I would like to just survey all of you just for a moment.

[01:09]

May I? Thank you very much for letting me look at your faces.

[02:14]

And thank you for your support up to this moment. And may it continue. I'd like to say a little bit about some of the teaching styles of the Lotus Sutra and their relationship to our so-called Zen lineage. I mentioned before that in the Lotus Sutra there's examples of misrecognition, misrecognition. people not recognizing who they're talking to, and also misdirection or indirect direction, sometimes even seen as lies.

[03:19]

It's part of the skillful devices of the Lotus Sutra and of the Zen school. In the Lotus Sutra in Chapter 4, when the lost child finally re-encounters his father, he doesn't recognize him. His father recognizes the child, but the child doesn't recognize the father. Not until the end of the parable does the child finally understand who this person is. one of the most influential, sometimes called great teachers in Zen history, is named Nan Chuan, South Spring.

[04:36]

One day, Nan Chuan was outside the monastery cutting grass with his sickle. And a monk approached the monastery and saw Nanjuan and went up to him and said, I'm looking for Nanjuan. So Nanjuan is the name of the monastery and also the name of the teacher of the monastery, Nanjuan. So the monk goes up to Nanjuan and said, I'm looking for Nanjuan. And Nanjuan says, This sickle is sharp. And the monk says, oh, that's nice. Thank you for telling me. But I'm looking for non-chuan.

[05:40]

And non-chuan said, it costs $30. The monk wanted to meet Nanjuan and Nanjuan showed him, but indirectly. That was his way of showing, helping the monk see the real Nanjuan. Another noted Zen Bodhisattva named Darshan went to visit Dragon Pond And he heard about Dragon Pond before he arrived. He heard that he was a great teacher. And he came to Dragon Pond, which again is the name of the teacher and the name of the place. And he went into the hall of the monastery.

[06:47]

And when Dragon Pond saw him coming, Dragon Pond hid behind a folding screen. And Deshaun came into the hall and looked around and said, now that I've come to Dragon Pond, I don't see a pond and I don't see a dragon. And then Dragon Pond came up from behind the screen and said, therefore you really see dragon pond. And a dragon pond let Darshan hang out with them the rest of the day into the evening. And when it got late, dragon pond said to the visiting monk Darshan,

[07:51]

It's getting late. Perhaps you should go. And Deshaun went out of the teacher's room and said, It's dark outside. I can't see. And Deshaun said, Oh, here, take this lamp with you. So they went to the door, opened the door, went outside, and they gave him this lamp. and then dragging upon blew it out. And together they experienced great awakening. I told you earlier about my first meeting with Sukhriyashi was when I saw his feet.

[09:07]

Do you remember that story? The foot story? The blessed teaching feet? But before I saw his feet, I went to, the first thing I did is I went to the Zen Center, to the Sokoji Temple. The address was 1881 Bush Street. So I went to 1881 Bush Street and knocked on the door, and an Asian man, and it turns out he was Japanese, opened the door and he was a man, elderly man, a little younger than me. He opened the door and I don't know if I said, can I come in?

[10:16]

But he opened the door and he let me in. And I went into the room and the room was pretty full of other elderly Asian men. And the man who let me in gestured that there was a seat for me to sit down and I sat down and I watched this room of elderly Japanese men. And I did not really know about the game of Go. But anyway, they were playing Go and they were smoking cigarettes. And I sat there for quite a while watching them do this And then, you know, I'm a little slow sometimes. After a while, I thought, I wonder if this is actually the Zen Center. I got the address right, but I wonder if this is the Zen Center.

[11:19]

So I said to one of the men, is this a Zen Center? And they said, no, no, the Zen Center is next door. So it turns out there's an 1881A and an 1881B. And so then I went to the other Zen center, I mean the other door, knocked on it, and another Asian man opened the door. But this Asian man looked like what I thought a Zen monk or a Zen priest would look like. He had a shaved head and wearing robes, something like what I'm wearing right now. And I thought it was Suzuki Roshi. And I'd heard that Suzuki Roshi was about 62. And this man looked like he was in his 30s. So I thought, wow, the Zen seems to be really good for your health.

[12:24]

And I didn't say, are you Suzuki Roshi? I just said, I've come to join the Zen Center. So this is the fall of 1967. And this priest, who I thought was Hizikura, she said, oh, you should talk to the president of Zen Center. He can come into my office and I'll call him and have him come over to meet you. So I sat there and in this priest's office watching him work. And yeah, I thought it was Suzuki Roshi. And then the president came over, our dear friend Silas Hoadley, and I went off with him. And I might have said, was that Suzuki Roshi?

[13:29]

And he said, no, that wasn't Suzuki Roshi, that was Patagiri sensei, who was in his middle thirties. And then later I came back and met the feet. And again, one of my sutras from the Pali canon that I bring up is a story about a venerable practitioner named Pukasati. And he was a teacher of many people.

[14:31]

And yeah, he seemed to be actually, although he was a teacher and he was also somewhat humble, so he could imagine the possibility that he had more to learn about reality and life. So he kind of, in his wondering, a divine being came to him. and said, if you're wondering if you have more to learn, it turns out you do. And there is somebody who can help you and teach you more deeply about life. And his name is Gautama, and he's a Buddha. He's a Tathagata. He's a teacher of humans and devas and so on. And he's teaching in Savatthi.

[15:36]

So when Pukasati heard about that, he decided to go and study with Gautama Shakyamuni Buddha. So he was heading to Savatthi. Now, in the background to this story, as Pugasati was heading off to Savatthi to meet the Buddha, the Buddha was in Savatthi. And for some reason or other, the Buddha decided to take a walk and wander. And the Buddha went by herself and took off her glamour so that she looked just like an ordinary... monastic walking down the road she didn't have her congregation and she didn't have her glamour so people couldn't see oh here comes the Buddha and she walked from Savati to Rajagriha why did she go there

[17:01]

Meanwhile, on his way to visit the Buddha, Phukasati went to Rajagriha. And he got there before the Buddha. And he went to a potter who had a shed and asked if he could stay in the potter's shed. And the potter said, yes, venerable sir, you may. Stay as long as you like. Then the Buddha shows up and goes to the same potter as Pugasati who's coming to meet the Buddha. And says to the potter, do you have a place I could stay? And the potter says, yeah, I have a shed. And you can stay there, but there's already somebody staying there, another venerable person staying there.

[18:08]

So if it's okay with that person, you're welcome to stay as long as you like. So Buddha goes to the shed and meets Pukasati and says, would it be all right with you if I stayed here too? And Pukasati said, yeah, there's plenty of room. You can stay as long as you like. And then they spent the night together. And both of them spent most of the night sitting in meditation. And the Buddha saw this monk sitting in meditation and thought, this is a pretty sincere meditator. Perhaps I could ask him some questions. So he politely says, Under whom have you gone forth on the way? Who is your teacher?

[19:11]

And Pukasati said, my teacher is Gautama Buddha. And Buddha said to Pukasati, where does your teacher live? And Pukasati said, he's living in Sabati. And Buddha says, have you ever met your teacher? And Bhukasati says, no, I haven't met him. Would you know what he looked like? Bhukasati said, no, I wouldn't know. And then the Buddha thinks maybe he'd like to hear some teachings from the person he's going to meet. So he offers him teaching and he gives him teaching through the night. And Pukasati listens. And in the middle of the teaching, Pukasati realizes that the person who's talking to him is the person he has been seeking.

[20:21]

The person who is talking to him is the Buddha. And although he awakens to who he's talking to, he lets the Buddha finish his Dharma talk. But he's very happy not just to meet the Buddha, but to awaken to the meeting with the Buddha. This is part of the misrecognition that's part of the path. part of the Lotus Sutra, part of our tradition. And the other part is misdirection, where the father tells the children that there's these three kinds of carts outside the burning house, misdirects them in order to get them out of the house.

[21:27]

and where the physician offers the children food, I mean medicine, but some of them won't take it. So then he misdirects them by telling them that he's dead so that they can receive, misdirects them so they can receive the dharma. In the middle of the misdirection, And then... I wasn't... This just came up. I'm thinking of a story about our great ancestor, Dung Shan, and his teacher, Yun Yan. But as I was thinking about telling that to you, another story popped in my head of misdirection. And it's like that story I told you earlier when Suzuki Roshi said to me at the time of...

[22:31]

me becoming ordained as a priest, he said, I'm sure you won't be arrogant getting ordained today. So, Deng Shan studied for a while with his dear teacher, Yun Yan. And when he was about to leave, he told Yun Yan that he was planning to leave. By the way, he had become Yun Yan's successor. But That doesn't mean the teaching and the training was over. It just means he could leave because he had accepted responsibility for the great matter of the Buddhadharma. And so he told his teacher, I think I'm going to go now. And his teacher said, after you leave, it will be hard for us to meet. Maybe the teacher was, you know, having some postpartum depression.

[23:39]

After you leave, it will be hard for us to meet. And Dung Shan said, after I leave, it will be hard for us not to meet. And then when he was actually just about to leave, as he was leaving, he went to his teacher. Deng Xiaon went to his teacher, Yuan Yuan, and said, a hundred years from now, which is a polite way of saying, after the show of extinction of my teacher, you, if people ask me about you, how could I portray you? And Yuen Yuen said, there's two translations of this. One translation is, just this person is it.

[24:43]

And the other translation is, just this is it. Either translation will work for my purposes right now. How should I, after your extinction, after your show of nirvana, if people ask, how should I portray you? Just this person is it. Just this is it. And Dung Shan kind of looked down and thought about that. And Yuen Yuen said, now that you've accepted responsibility for the great matter, you must be thorough going. And he left with this teaching.

[25:55]

And then after walking for about 150 miles, he was crossing a stream and saw his reflection in the stream. And then he understood this dharma flower from his teacher, this dharma flower of just this is it. He understood it. In other words, he turned it. And he realized that his teacher had misdirected him He said just this is it, and really, just this is otherwise. Just this person is it. Just this person is otherwise. Just this person is not it. So that we are misdirected so we can turn the misdirection.

[27:02]

at least the Lotus Sutra does sometimes, and some Zen teachers misdirect. They hide. They say something which should be turned. It's a sad situation that the students have to kind of turn their teacher's teaching. Sometimes you might say, climb on top of it and leap into space. And also later, when Dung Shan was doing a memorial ceremony for his teacher, a monk said, when you were with Yuen Yuen, What teachings did he give you?

[28:11]

And Dengshan said, well, actually, he didn't give me any teachings. And the monk said, well, you started with the great teacher Nanchuan. Why do you make offerings to Yuen Yuen, brackets, who didn't give you any teachings? And Dung Shan said, it's not my late teacher's virtues or his teaching of the Buddha Dharma that I esteem. What was great about him is he never directly indicated. He gave me things that weren't teachings so I could turn them into teachings. The teacher should not do all the student's work.

[29:17]

Okay, well, that was a little comment on the Lotus Sutra and the Zen school. Now I'd like to go back to the Lotus Sutra. And Some people see the Lotus Sutra as the core of the Lotus Sutra, as chapter two to chapter 22. There's a story there. And it kind of comes to a conclusion with chapter 22. There's more wonderful things afterwards, but the basic assembly, the fully populated assembly, is during that, is it 20 chapters? So we're now coming to chapter 21. It's called Divine Powers of the Tathagata.

[30:29]

And just to give an overview of that chapter, I would say that It starts out with all those bodhisattvas who sprung from the earth, coming before the Buddha, joining their palms and saying, we will, 100 years from now, after your extinction, we will teach this sutra. Because we want to receive it and embrace it and read it and recite it and copy it and teach it to others. We want to do that. And then the Buddha, this is called the divine powers of the Buddha, then the Buddha demonstrates divine powers.

[31:37]

And after demonstrating the divine powers, the Buddha points out that all these amazing powers, still, with all that power, still, the virtues and blessings of the Lotus Sutra could not be exhausted. In describing them, in proclaiming them, with that great power, you still couldn't exhaust the virtues of the sutra. And then, without trying to exhaust the virtues of the sutra, the Buddha briefly tells about them, and then briefly tells a little bit more about them. So stepping back and just giving now a little bit more detail, the Buddha demonstrates the Tathagata's divine powers in the following way.

[32:43]

sitting now on the Dharma seat with his partner, abundant treasures to talk to. They're both sitting in the jewel stupa together, and Shakyamuni Buddha sticks out her tongue. And the Buddha's tongue is very long and very broad. and it goes out and [...] goes all the way to the Brahma heavens. And then at the same time, all the billions of Buddhas who are in this assembly with Shakyamuni Buddha and abundant treasures to Tagata, all those billions of Buddhas they also stick out their tongue and extend it up to the heavens.

[33:46]

And the earth shakes in six ways. Or maybe I got the earth shaking too early. Anyway, you got all these billions of tongues going out from all these billions of Buddhas up to the sky. And then simultaneously, they all withdraw their tongues back into their mouth and cough. Simultaneously. And then they all together snap their finger and the earth shakes. This is the supernatural, divine powers of the Tathagata. So this is just to give the assembly a little glimmer of the powers of the Tathagata. And then the Tathagata says, now, if with this power, I would try to describe the virtues of this sutra, I would not be able to finish.

[34:58]

I would never be able to. But in brief, this is just briefly, The blessings of the Lotus Sutra are that all of the teachings of the Tathagata are included. All the powers of the Tathagata are included. The secret pivot of the Buddha's enlightenment is included. All this is included in this sutra, in brief. Therefore, and in a sense he's addressing these bodhisattvas who say they will teach. Therefore, since you said you would, you should teach this wondrous Dharma Flower Sutra. You should, since you said you would, embrace it, receive it, copy it, read it, recite it, and teach it.

[36:08]

so that all living beings can hear it and understand it. The Buddha has these divine powers, but what it all comes down to is something that we could do, that we could say. We could say this in brief. We could describe the virtues of the Lotus Sutra. It includes the entire teaching of the Tathagatas. It embraces the secret pivot of the storehouse of Buddha's teaching. We can remember that and say it with our normal human abilities. And then the Buddha goes on to say, any place, anywhere, that someone teaches, that someone recites, that someone copies, that someone reads this sutra in such a place, there is the seat of awakening.

[37:27]

In any place where somebody's reading the sutra, reciting the sutra, copying the sutra, teaching the sutra, in that place, we have the place of awakening of all Buddhas. And in that place, the Buddhas attain unsurpassed, complete, perfect enlightenment. And in that place, what place? The place where one reads, recites, studies, or teaches this sutra. In that place, the Buddhas turn the wheel of the rare and unsurpassable Dharma. And in that place, the Buddhas make the gesture of entering nirvana, but also they make the gesture, not the gesture, the reality of entering true nirvana, of entering perfect awakening.

[38:35]

And yeah, there's a story about our ancestor Dogen. He left a heiji, where all his dear students were, and went to Kyoto because he was sick for medical attention. There was some possibility he might get medical attention and be able to be cured somewhat and go back to Eheiji. But when he got to Kyoto, which isn't terribly far from Eheiji, his condition became more and more critical. And in that critical situation, he kept turning the diamond wheel. How did he do it? In his sick room, in his death room, he copied the Lotus Sutra on paper, I think, and put the calligraphy on a pillar in his room.

[39:51]

And the part he copied was, wherever someone reads or copies this sutra, Such a place is a place of enlightenment. He enacted this at the time of his death, this teaching. And you enact this teaching by reciting the teaching. By reciting the teaching, that when you recite the teaching, this is the place of awakening, this is the place of all Buddhas awakening. This is the place where Buddhas turn the Dharma wheel and the recitation is where the Buddhas turn the wheel and the recitation turns the wheel. In this way, in his final illness, he kept turning the Dharma wheel by reciting and copying the Lotus Sutra.

[41:01]

I don't know how much of the day he could do that when he was on the verge of death, but that's how he spent his last time on earth as Dogen Zenji, reciting this part of the Lotus Sutra on the divine powers of the Tathagata to make it possible for us to recite the Lotus Sutra as we're dying. The divine powers of the Tathagata make it possible for us to be at the place with all Buddhas. May I go on to the next chapter? Chapter 22, which is called Entrustment.

[42:11]

Another translation is Final Commission. Okay, once again, just reiterate the context. Reiterate the Great Assembly. In case you don't remember, where is the Buddha? The Buddha is sitting on the Dharma seat with his friend, abundant treasures to Tagata. They're sitting in this huge jeweled stupa. They are surrounded by innumerable bodhisattvas. For example, the innumerable bodhisattvas who sprung from the earth. and all the other bodhisattvas who were in the assembly before those bodhisattvas came, and also the billions of Buddhas who came to this teaching, and also all the monks and nuns and laymen and laywomen students of the Buddha, and also the virtually unlimited variety and diversity of beings

[43:31]

In the sutra, the list has about maybe 15 types, but you can go on with that variety endlessly. You can include banana slugs and rats and cockroaches and trees and grasses and flowers and mountains and dolphins and sharks and whales and elephants and lions and tigers. All beings are in this assembly. And the Buddha is sitting in this very fancy seat. And again, all these Buddhas are sitting under giant jewel trees on lion thrones. Then the Buddha gets up from the seat. Now the Buddha is not sitting anymore. The Buddha is standing. Arises from the seat. and reaches out her right hand and displays divine powers.

[44:42]

With her right hand, she places it on the head of innumerable bodhisattvas. It's pretty divine to just put your hand on one bodhisattva's head The Buddha now puts your hand on innumerable bodhisattva heads. It doesn't say that he puts it on the heads of the Buddhas. They have already received this entrustment, and they can also give this entrustment. But now he entrusts the bodhisattvas, touching the head of all of them. And touching the head, the Buddha says, For innumerable, hundreds of thousands of billions of eons, I have studied and practiced this rare dharma of supreme awakening.

[46:03]

And again, the Buddha puts her hand on the head and says, for hundreds of thousands of billions of eons, I had studied and practiced this rare Dharma of supreme awakening. I now entrust it to you. You should brackets since you said you would close brackets receive this embrace it read it recite it copy it and teach it

[47:09]

to all living beings. Again, the Buddha places her hand on the heads of the bodhisattvas and says, for hundreds of thousands of billions of eons, I have studied and practiced this rare dharma of supreme awakening. I now entrust it to you. You should, since you said you would, receive it, embrace it, protect it, cherish it, honor it, read it, copy it, and teach it. to all sentient beings so they can hear it and understand it.

[48:15]

This is the entrustment of the Lotus Sutra by Shakyamuni Buddha to all the bodhisattvas. Now the bodhisattvas hear this and also all the Buddhas hear this. And the bodhisattvas are filled with joy. The whole assembly is filled with great joy. And they join their palms and bend their head They join their palms and face the Buddha face to face and lower their head. And they say, we will do as the Tathagata has instructed.

[49:29]

Please, world-honored one, don't worry about that. We will do as the Tathagata has instructed. Please, world-honored one, don't worry about it. We will do as the Tathagata has instructed. Please, world-honored one, don't worry about that. Then the Buddha says, okay, all these billions of Buddhas which are the embodiment of me throughout the universe, all these Buddhas who are me may return to their own lands.

[50:57]

And then he says to the Buddhas, all you Buddhas go in peace and let the jeweled stupa of abundant treasures to Tagata be as it was before. And then the innumerable beings in this unlimited, ungraspable, inconceivable, immeasurable, wondrous assembly. All the Buddhas, all the Bodhisattvas, all the Arhats, all the Shravakas, all the laymen and laywomen and monks and nuns, all the multitude of beings,

[52:00]

They were all filled with great joy. This could be said to be the conclusion of Chapter 22 of the wondrous Dharma Flower Sutra. It's still early. So we could maybe go for a while and have people make offerings now and then take a break or we can take a break now. Any idea which is best? Should we go for a while and take a break or take a break now? If I might speak for the assembly, we could do... I'm perfectly fine supporting either.

[53:05]

We could get started and then take a break a little bit. Because some people are leaving at 11. Okay. So maybe we should take a break at 11? Yeah, I think that sounds good. Okay. So does the assembly concur with Brendan? Is that okay? Okay. So we'll keep going till 11 and take a break at 11 and see if anybody wants to stay on after that. I will. Okay, offering time from the Great Assembly, the Great Lotus Assembly. We have an offering from Shindo to the wondrous Dharma Flower Assembly. Reverend Shindo. I ask you to start your video. Thank you, Great Assembly, for holding this container.

[54:36]

My question, Tenshin Roshi, is it's a little long, if I may. I did not want to take up too much time, and I don't want to Keep rambling all over the place. So I have written it down. If I may read it to you. So it has a background of what I'm saying. Firstly, I just want to acknowledge that I'm not speaking now as a person from India or I'm not supporting India or any particular country. geographical ideology or philosophy or place. I'm just talking as just one human being to other human beings. But it just so happens that this person is exposed to Indian philosophy in living terms and is now wrapped in the Buddha's robes and entering the Tathagata's chamber in California.

[55:51]

Even though the causes and conditions may seem accidental, they are, as we all know, part of an interconnected matrix. As I see and understand, Indian philosophical schools are 12 to 16 in number, and some are theistic, some atheistic. And these have originated from the geographical region of India, which was never historically subject to harsh situations like the Inquisition period or communism, which hindered or obstructed mankind from thinking or expressing philosophical thoughts. Some of these schools are orthodox and some heterodox. Buddhism and Jainism are part of these 12 schools of thought. Be it the proto-language of mythological laws or of the ancient Vedas, mythological stories of 10,000 gods or of the Vedas, or the most refined philosophical thinkers like Krishnamurti or Aurobindo,

[57:09]

there is an underlying consistency of unitive understanding. This is in the realm of philosophical thinking. And today I'm here in the United States, which is very parallel to the situation in a very materialistic realm where the youngest country in the world, the United States has brought the whole world to one platform technologically, where we are connected and interacting on one screen. So when there is this incredible possibility of integration of science and wisdom on one side, there is also this differentiation of them and us. And with all due respect, to all the venerable Tibetan, Chinese, Burmese, Sri Lankan, Japanese, Korean masters who have preserved the teachings of the Buddha from getting lost and have also contributed to connecting the relative and absolute aesthetically and so beautifully and so dialectically.

[58:20]

And Dogen Zenji's creative and structural way of keeping it alive through Zen With due respect to all of that, I just can't help but also point out the rough edges among scholars, which seem to disparage through the texts and through the talks and criticize and mock at the teaching, the very root of Indian thought. Like using a straw man, they say that they are touching the very heart of the teaching. The word Atman is nothing but just the word Buddha nature, which is Tathagata Garba or Buddha Datu or Descartes' substance or Lebanese's monad of monads, which awakens prajna or purest wisdom comes from there. Nowhere is it stated about permanent existence. It is this underlying essence which is seen in the culture of the Indian subcontinent.

[59:27]

the samskara, we talk of the mind of the great sage of India. How can we understand or even comprehend that mind? The mind behind the Buddha, the mind behind Bodhidharma, the culture that supports that mind, the roots from where it comes. Neither Buddha nor Bodhidharma nor Kumarajiva nor Naga Arjuna nor Asanga nor Vasubandhu were samurai or never did they come from such a background. If we as human beings divide and separate in the name of isms, how can knowledge become unitive? How can we bring knowledge together and understand for all of mankind? Just the misconception of Atman holds the richness of India hostage to this enigmatic possibility. India is isolated and misinterpreted when the art, literature, theater, architecture, music, health signs are completely steeped

[60:36]

in that essence of the Buddha nature. How can we make peace negotiations and how can we bring dialectical revaluation is my question and [...] also i like to point out that the national anthem too is so steeped in in the the buddha nature or atman which is just the same thing and you know so i just feel that i wanted to express this and you know ask thank you And at the end, you had a simple question. Would you say it again? How can we make peaceful negotiations of bringing this together? It was just, sorry, it was just a pent-up feeling which has been troubling me. And also, you had mentioned entering the Dharma through the difficulty.

[61:40]

You enter through the Dharma and not... Not brush it under the carpet. And I've been brushing it under the carpet for years because this was so pent up. And every time I hear and study the Dharma and I thought, you know, since you said enter through it, I just made this. Yeah. Sorry if I have disparaged or stated anything wrong. I apologize, but it was a very, very deep-rooted feeling that I had to express. Thank you for the opportunity, Tenshin Roshi. You give me the courage to speak. Thank you. You're welcome. And I share your question of how we can peacefully negotiate with with this difficulty which you have put before us. Help me please discuss this difficulty. Okay, I want to keep looking at that.

[62:41]

Thank you so much. With you. You're welcome. Thank you for your offering. We have an offering from Warren. Good morning, Tenshin Roshi. Good morning, Warren. Hello, Great Assembly. I'm happy to come out of the Great Assembly and sit on this warm seat with you. I feel like in the assembly, sitting and listening to Buddhas and Buddhas talking, that we're the host in the Great Assembly.

[63:59]

And then coming here on this seat made me more like a guest for me. There were many expressions of love, probably all of it was, whether I recognized it or not, in these Buddha, meeting Buddha talks. And we seem to be able to have so many different shades of love. So the question came to me because there were two lovely bodhisattvas who said to you so tenderly that I love you. And it moved me. And you were very tender and you said, I love you.

[65:01]

But then you said, and I'm sorry. And my question is, what do you mean when you say that? And what does that mean? And why did you say it in the afterthought of replying that I love you to these people? It may be the case when we feel and say to someone, I love you. We may feel our heart open at that time, or it may open before that, and then we say that. In my case once, I was feeling my heart kind of

[66:04]

constricted or kind of dry and crusty. I could barely, I felt like I could barely breathe. Well, my heart was hard and I felt like I needed to say, I love you. Otherwise my heart would die. So I said, I love you to someone. And my heart opened. But I felt like it still wasn't really, it didn't fully open. I didn't say enough. So then I said, thank you. And it opened more. And then I felt like, but it still wasn't all the way open. So somehow I was given the words, I'm sorry.

[67:08]

And then it opened more. There's something about saying sorry that opens the heart more than I love you does. Not more than. It complements it. It develops the opening. But I could have started with I'm sorry. But for me at that time, the last thing I said was, I'm sorry. And the first thing was, I love you. But you could also start with, thank you. I'm sorry, I love you. These are all possible ways of using your body, which open you up to who you're with. That's one story of where I'm sorry it comes from. It isn't necessarily that I have some particular thing in mind, but just generally my openheartedness includes acknowledging that I've been unskillful.

[68:16]

If I don't acknowledge that I've been unskillful, my heart isn't really fully open. I have been unskillful. And that's part of it, but then also I'm sorry for it. That's more of it. That's one story. That's a good story then. I just, one other thing I'd like to say because it's such a, our Lotus Sutra is so fabulous and circus-like and You know, tomorrow when I wake up to come do this, I'm going to look out on that field and the circus is going to be gone. There's not going to be anything left. That's what you think. Well, anyway, no sign or trace. Everything's swept away and just perfect.

[69:21]

Yeah, sweep it away and find it again. Like now. Thank you for your teaching. You're welcome. And your comment on it's like a circus. You know, people have a little bit of problem with the Lotus Sutra because it keeps saying, this is the greatest show on earth. People didn't get mad at P.T. Barnum when he said it. Anyway, please excuse the Lotus Sutra for saying this is the greatest show on earth. This is the greatest circus. You can say that wherever you are. If you say one word of the Lotus Sutra, where you are is the greatest show on earth. Indeed. And then give it away. I will. Thank you.

[70:21]

Let's not hold on to the Lotus Sutra. Okay, Peter H., please make your offering to the greatest Lotus Sutra assembly on earth. Sorry, trying to find you, Peter. There we go. Lost. Okay, I'm going to say good morning, Reb, and good morning, great and grateful assembly. Good morning, Peter. I want to thank you for bringing this offering to me. I have not held it in that high regard and I have changed my mind. There does seem to be something here.

[71:26]

I guess I was turned off by all the phantasmagorical and you know, it's, It is what it is. And, you know, I can digest that and put it in perspective. You know, I've thought again as I've reread this that, you know, this would really make a great book. or Pixar computer-generated epic. And I don't know, maybe somebody with screenwriting skills can do that. This time, I have focused on the... Never disrespecting Bodhisattva.

[72:35]

I really enjoyed hearing that again, hearing Greg's song by Abbott Allen, future Abbott Allen, and, you know, Fu's remarks about that chapter. And just really, it's something I want to emulate. Partially because I am always disrespecting Bodhisattva, and I'd like to change that. A new chapter. A new chapter. Always disparaging Bodhisattva. Well, I'd like to offer my apologies right now to the ZendoZoom crew. I've been kind of a pain, and I... would like to, I have offered some remarks in the, um, in the, the forum about maybe, uh, uh, uh, making a little improvement and, um, take it or leave it.

[73:42]

That's, you know, I, I do, I, I, I sit with the city center sangha, uh, most days. And, um, I, I guess I'm just kind of too familiar with that. So anyway, um, you know, I never really got the, uh, Buddha sitting with the Buddha. And, uh, until, uh, your talk this, uh, this year and particularly the exchanges with, um, can't remember now, uh, talking about, uh, alcoholics and, and, uh, the, uh, 12 step programs, uh, of which I remember, as you can probably see in my signature and, uh, I've always kind of understood recovery in that program to be with one alcoholic talking to another, with one recovering alcoholic talking to another alcoholic, with one Buddha talking to...

[74:42]

another Buddha, one Buddha with a Buddha. And, you know, sometimes it takes a circuitous route, you know, for us to come to an understanding. And I believe I've come to a greater understanding about a Buddha with a Buddha. And that it's just there in that instant that the magic happens, that the greatest show unfolds. I don't know. So there's that. And then there was one other offering I'd like to make. I really enjoyed, and I guess a lot of people weren't able to do this, I really enjoyed the services on the lawn. When it was sunny and just, I don't know, I've been to a couple of the intensives out of Green Gulch. I've changed my picture to my icon, my Zoom icon to reflect that. That is me coming out of an intensive with a big stupid smile on my face.

[75:48]

Before I got two flat tires on the way back down the hill. But, you know, I did so enjoy those intensives and being with you all in the great and grateful assembly. And so my question is. And I have to repent and say that I have not been as wholehearted in this intensive as I have. in other times and in other ways, and ask you, how can I become more wholehearted in my efforts? The first thing that comes to mind is what you just said. How can I become more wholehearted in my efforts? That question... will promote, does promote becoming more wholehearted. I'm not discouraging you from giving yourself some directions about how to be more wholehearted.

[76:59]

I'm not discouraging that. But I think you already have it right there. That question is at the heart of being wholehearted. When you say that question, that's wholeheartedness right there. That's the Lotus Sutra right there. I could carry on in the next moment. In the next moment. Yeah. Yeah. And how do I bring myself back when I get distracted? Well, it's not so much bring yourself back, but if you notice you're distracted, at that time you notice it, you're back. And then when you're back, you can say, oh, I confessed, I got distracted.

[78:03]

And maybe, and I'm sorry. When you notice it, you're back. When you confess it, you're back. When you say you're sorry, you're back. Being sorry for being distracted is not being distracted. It's being present. It's being wholehearted. You can wholeheartedly say, I'm sorry I was half-hearted. I really am. And I don't want to overdo it. Just, I am sorry I was half-hearted. And I feel wholehearted about that. I really am. Are there actions I could take? Well, when you notice that you're distracted, that's an action. Attention is action. It's an action. Your mind is attending. Oh, I got distracted. Oh, I was silly. That's an action. When you're silly, that's an action.

[79:07]

Noticing that you're silly is an action. Noticing that you're distracted is an action. Being distracted is an action. I just went off the rails there. Okay. And yeah. I'm sorry. I mean, not debilitatingly sorry. Just sorry. Because I actually want to be on the rails. But Being off them is part of the path of being on the rails. And I just noticed it, acknowledged it, felt some sorrow, acknowledged it, and I understand that this is the pure and simple color of true practice right now. It isn't all of it, but it's a frequently exercised muscle on the bodhisattva body. The great bodhisattvas do a lot of confessing and repenting.

[80:12]

I feel a lightness. And I like what you said about afflictions and cutting through them. That does it for me. Delusions, I can still go with delusions. But cutting through them, if it's me, I don't know about others. And I hope they find what works for them. So I know that a lot of people are in line here. Thank you for your attention and I hope everyone enjoys the rest of the intensive. We have an offering from Grace. My dear Reb, Tenshin Roshi, friend, teacher, great assembly.

[81:35]

I've loved being back at Green Gulch and so wonderful to sit with you. Sit inside of that Zendo again. I've got a question. I think it flows out of Shindo's question. What I was going to ask you immediately, Reb, is given all chapter 22, are you going to write, recite, read on your deathbed the Lotus Sutra. I have no business asking, but I can tell you that I may or I may not. I really, this has struck me as magic. It reminds me of being a witch in my witch days. You know how that goes? What you say goes out three times, so be very careful. So I haven't finally made the commitment yet about how I made the commitment because I promised that I would teach this.

[82:43]

And I've loved my small group, but I'm fence sitting about the rest of it. And I would love to hear whether you're fence sitting about writing this and reading this and reciting on your deathbed. And if so, would you please, if you're not, don't let me know that. But if you are fence sitting, could you let me know that? What does fence-hitting mean? Meaning you're not committed one way or the other to whether or not you think that you're going to... Well, you know, as we die, none of us knows whether we're going to be conscious enough to do this writing, reciting, reading. Many of us won't be. But when you think about dying and you think about your study of Lotus Sutra, do you intend to perform the Lotus Sutra on your deathbed, all things being equal, meaning if causes and conditions allow it?

[83:50]

I intend to perform the Lotus Sutra now. That is helpful. Thank you very much. And now. And now, because I have been performing the Lotus Sutra, I can talk to you without looking at the Lotus Sutra. I remember it because I looked at it many times. It's part of my body now. And if I am committed to continue to perform the Lotus Sutra every day of my life, and then if I lose my mind, if I become demented, it'll be in my body. That old guy there, he doesn't know who's in the room or where he is, and he's talking about the Lotus Sutra. So I don't know exactly which chapter of the Lotus Sutra I'll be talking about when I die. I might also be talking about the Blue Cliff Record or the Book of Serenity, but that stuff will become part of my body, and it naturally flows out.

[84:54]

But I don't know what condition I'm going to be in, so I don't know what part of my body is going to come out. But, you know, I'm not a zoologist, so I don't know the names of many fish, so I probably won't be talking about fish. But being a student of the Dharma all these years, when I study it, it changes my body. So my body is a Dharma-remembering machine. And so I commit now, as long as I have a mind, to use it to study this wonderful teaching that we've been given. And when I study it, it becomes me. And then it makes me want to study more. And then it becomes me. You know, one time I was in a, what do you call it, a state of great disorientation. when I was a young priest.

[85:59]

I was in the middle of a great psychophysical storm. And I was putting on my robe, my okesa, which the okesa at the time has a rather complicated knot. And I was putting the robe on and did the knot properly. And I knew I can do this in the middle of a storm because I'd done it so many times. So I hope I can remember the teaching in the middle of the storms that are coming when I die. So that because I've done it so many times, the teaching will continue to be with me and guide me and celebrate me. And that's what I'm committed to is to practice now. And we'll see how it works towards the end in the storms that are coming. Thank you, dear. Great teacher. Thank you.

[87:06]

Okay, so we have an offering next from Bob Kavnar. Hi, Rev. Greetings from Houston. Hello, Bob. And the Great Assembly. Yeah. So I really enjoyed the calligraphy you sent this morning by email, so I wanted to offer it back to you. Thank you. I've found this to be a real calming thing for me to do is to do calligraphy. And I've been I started with Kaz Tanahashi about nine years ago. So that's your calligraphy. Yeah, that's me. That's me copying you. Great. That's there you go. Yeah. So so I wanted to to share this. I wanted to thank you and the Great Assembly for this last three weeks. I think Brendan knows this, but my brother-in-law passed away at the very beginning of this intensive from COVID.

[88:29]

And the first part of the intensive, I thought about dropping out, actually. And then I thought, no, I'm just going to absorb. And so I've been absorbing all of this from the Great Assembly for this last three weeks. And it's been very important to me. And I wanted to thank you for that. You know, the one thing that you taught us last year when you were in Houston for our session was the boat of compassion. And where you were rowing across the dirty waters and saving all beings.

[89:32]

And that has really – I mean, even before you mentioned it in this intensive – It really spoke to me. It kept coming back to me, what you said last year. And that's one of the visuals about my practice that I keep with me. And it's meant a lot to me this last three weeks. And I thank you for that. We have an offering from Brendan. How do I spotlight myself? I wonder if that's possible. Okay, well, I'm going to remove my spotlight and then replace Rev's spotlight.

[90:36]

There we go. Oh, to the rescue. Thank you. That was another host. Generous. Thank you. So I wanted to offer a poem to the assembly. And this poem is about a group of people who wanted to address the question, if people ask me about you, how can I portray you? And they answered it by climbing on top of it and leaping into space. This poem is called For Future Times and Buddhas. For Future Times and Beings is the name of Carl Sagan's essay dedicated to the project that captured the sounds, sights, greetings, and music of Earth, collected on the Golden Record and launched into space in 1977 on two great vehicles. NASA's Voyager mission is a quest, questing with questions for the outer planet, questioning the edge of our solar system, questioning ideas and theories, but also making an offering to the great assembly of faraway worlds in the far distant future.

[91:52]

To teach if we are called upon, to be taught if we are fortunate. In case a sentient being rarely meets even one of these interstellar stupas, risen from the earth, even in a hundred thousand million kalpas, and follows its teaching in gold-plated analog, speaking as the record does through its flowery language of images, Beings may have questions about a Buddha and a Buddha depicted side by side in silhouette, while the record plays its greetings in ancient Akkadian or modern Wu or timeless humpback whale song. And in Beethoven's Cavatina, beings may hear , the longing for peace and the longing to make contact. Human hopefulness in the face of great sadness and great fear. longing to be seen face to face by the cosmos and the collected ambient works of human civilization, a thorough and incomplete record of wasted time.

[93:00]

Throughout countless lives, Voyager's golden records will course through space, seeking to teach future Buddhas about missed opportunities, while present Buddhas are taught that we are indeed fortunate. For your wonderful offering. You're welcome. Thank you for your wonderful listening. Okay, we now have an offering from Zaheer. Hello, attention, Roshi. Hello, great assembly. Thanks a lot for being here. Thanks a lot for this opportunity. It was very great listening to you, how your teachings are capable of transforming any situation that is presented to you.

[94:04]

Anything that is given to us can be a subject of meditation or a subject of thinking, and then may itself be a Dharma teaching. I would like to ask you something about trust. We learn that it's good to be compassionate with everything, with our doubts, with other problems, with everything. But trust is difficult because we don't know what we are looking at. We think that we have, I see this person, I think I know this person, and I read this in your book, The Three Turnings of the Wheel. that many things should be subject of your compassion, but not necessarily your trust. And then I was thinking about what you said when, yeah, maybe sometimes we look at people and ask ourselves the question, are they ready for the teaching or not? But then I find myself a bit troubled by the idea, hmm, can I trust my feelings?

[95:11]

Maybe I'm just trying to look at them from up, like from up. place and then again when i encounter the lotus sutra what i'm encountering can i trust the text it is a text i think that it is a text but it's something beyond the text so i can have compassion for the text but sometimes it's not clear what can i trust because anything that i conceive is something that i think it has so and so features or characteristics But therefore, for me, I feel it's easier to, I mean, easier having compassion, but then trust is really hard. So what would be your advice to this attention ownership? Thanks a lot. Thank you for your question. I don't know if this following...

[96:12]

attribution to suzuki roshi is any place other than me saying so because i didn't hear this in a lecture i heard it in person when there weren't very many people around and what it is is he said i don't trust people i don't trust this lovely glass I don't trust this lovely young man. I don't trust what I think of you. I don't trust what I feel about you. What I trust is practicing compassion with this cup, with this glass. I trust appreciating it, being careful of it, being generous with it, being patient with it, being calm with it, being diligent with it.

[97:15]

I trust the practice. I don't trust the teacher that appears to me. Now, if I did trust, I wouldn't trust that either, but I would be compassionate to my trust. So I'm not worthy of trust. I'm questionable. However, Trusting me might be useful, but I don't, basically, I trust the practice and the teaching, not things. I don't trust my feelings. I trust practicing with my feelings, honoring them, honoring my feelings, attending to them, being patient with them, examining them, questioning them. And also I trust doing that with other people, not just by myself. I don't trust studying by myself.

[98:19]

The practice that I trust is studying together. So that's what I trust. And I do trust, but still sometimes my trust has little pauses in it. which means I forget to do the thing I trust. You know, if the glass breaks on my head, I might forget to practice compassion with my experience at that moment. But still, I don't change my mind and say, I don't want to do it anymore. I just, when I'm shocked, sometimes I forget what I trust. But I don't trust being shocked. I trust being compassionate to being shocked. I don't trust being hurt. I don't trust being insulted. I trust being patient with insult and pain. I don't trust pleasure. I trust being compassionate with pleasure.

[99:23]

So that's what I trust. And again, my trust is not perfect because sometimes the event that's presenting itself is so intense that It kind of disorients me for a while. A story came to mind, which I'll try to tell very slowly, which is I had kind of a very challenging experience with the California Department of Motor Vehicles, DMV. I had some really difficult times with it. And at the conclusion of my difficult experience with the DMV, I was at the DMV again. I had a series of difficult experiences with the DMV and with my driver's license. So there I was in the DMV, waiting in line. And all that difficulty with the DMV, I was temporarily

[100:32]

disoriented from what I trust. Of course, I don't trust the DMV. I don't trust my driver's license. But it was getting so difficult for me that I forgot my practice to be kind with the situation of being in line after line after line. I forgot. And up ahead of me in the line, someone turned around and said, hi, hey, Reb. And that person gave up her place in the line. Oh, no, that person says, you can come up here and be with me. And I said, I can't do that. So she gave up her place and came back and stood with me. And she said, how are you? And I said, fine, except I'm at the DMV again. And she said, You're here for us.

[101:36]

And then I remembered that whatever difficult situation we're in, we're there to help others and to teach others how to deal with the difficulty. But I don't trust the difficulty. I trust the practice with the difficulty. and that I'm not doing just for myself. And when I forget to do it, fortunately, people come and say, don't you remember what you're doing? Oh, thank you. Sorry, I forgot. Okay. Thanks a lot. You're welcome. Okay, it's 11 o'clock Pacific time. We've been at this for two hours, so we'll take a 10-minute break, and we'll return at 10 minutes after the hour. So, Reb, was there anything you wanted to say in the meantime?

[102:44]

Oh, yes. So some people are leaving. So all those who have to go to work, I understand that people at Green Gulch have to go to the kitchen. People at City Center have to go about their work. For all of you that are leaving now, I'm just, you have supported me to do my job. I love my job and I need your support and you gave it to me. So thank you. I love you and I'm sorry. He knocked it out of the park, Reb. Okay. Welcome back everyone. We will hear an offering from Laurie Hogetsu. Hello, Reb, and great assembly of the wonderful Dharma Flower Lotus Sutra Bodhisattvas.

[103:57]

I'm sitting here in Chicago. The name Chicago means place of the fragrant onion in our native Potawatomi Indian language, the language of my ancestors. And I would like to convey an offering of gratitude and of peace and of Hope. Reb, thank you for helping us free dive off of the boat of compassion into the ocean of blessings. You know, sometimes I felt breathless and sometimes I felt great joy. And I feel gratitude to everyone for us doing this together. A long time ago, maybe 30-some years ago, I was participating in peace walks, wandering across the U.S.

[105:12]

and across the former Soviet Union. And I was troubled because the people, including myself, who were purporting to convey peace, were actually quite angry and agitated a lot of the time. and really wanted peace, you know. And there was also a tenderness in that. But I wondered, like, how can peace come when there's so much difficulty and suffering in the people who actually want to convey peace? And in the midst of that questioning, I met your dear student, Tayo. And I saw something and I recognized it and I was like, oh, I think I want to try that out. And immediately just began to follow this way, whatever our way is.

[106:14]

And I feel like in this, when I think Shindo, my Dharma sister was speaking and other Dharma sisters and brothers and friends, you know, that there's a great, uh, pain sometimes in seeing division and separation. Uh, and, uh, you know, whether it's sexism, cultural isms, you know, all this kind of pain. But I feel like this free diving experience is an experience of hope, of learning to extend ourselves in this world of endurance that we live in. And I, I guess I just feel really moved and supported. And I want to just, my feeling that keeps arising out of the waves of this ocean is this feeling that we are, we're weaving this brocade together.

[107:23]

You know, we're, we're creating a way beyond, beyond the old Buddhist or extending their compassion in this ocean with together to create the world in this way. And it's hard work. Darn, you're right, it's difficult. But I feel that this is like nourishment and comfort in the midst of that. And so from this little room that I've been sitting in for many hours per week in this cool, snowy city, I just want to convey that to everyone and express my heartfelt gratitude for this experience together. May it continue. So thank you very much. I'm so grateful that you found Tayo and Tayo found you. You've become a great Dharma asset.

[108:24]

Congratulations. We have an offering from Charlotte. Hello, dear Reb, beloved teacher. Hello. Hello, Great Assembly. Thank you so much for this opportunity. I wanted to show my face, give my face to all of you and

[109:34]

even though I feel like I have a scared, trembling face. I feel very deeply moved by these meetings that have been going on during these weeks. It has meant a lot to me. I'm going through a difficult time right now and it's been giving me a lot of strength. But I also have felt this last couple of days, I felt that I'm struggling a lot with reading the Lotus Sutra.

[110:45]

And I wondered if I could ask you a little about that. Because I kind of, I'm grateful to what you said about at the beginning of the talk, how you talked about that The sutra is for us to turn it. I don't remember what the word is in English now, but it's... That it's... We are being fooled. But we can...

[111:51]

um oh english um um anyway um i i have this um kind of superstitious part of my mind that kind of really grabs onto the warnings in the Lord of Sutra and all the, if you don't do like this, then you will go to hell, or if you don't... Yeah, this very hard, harsh... language it's kind of something in my mind really clings to that and wakes up some demons in my mind who kind of really sticks um to um and i feel kind of really um

[113:07]

Like I'm caught. And I get very afraid. And I feel like it affects my practice, that I become very... almost afraid of just reading the book, because what if I start to think and disparage the Lotus Sutra? And I find that it affects my... I'm sorry, my daughter came. Here is Alma. She's going to say hello to Red. Okay. Would you like some suggestions about how to study? Yes, thank you.

[114:15]

So I would suggest, not just for you, but for me too, that before you open the Lotus Sutra, you just have it closed in front of you, or maybe even in an envelope so you can't even see the title. But you know it's in there. That you sit down on the ground in front of the Lotus Sutra and don't open it until you're quiet and still. But when you're quiet and still, maybe even wait a little longer before you open it and see if you want to open it. And also remember you're going to open a book that has dangerous things in it, that has teachings which you might get hooked on.

[115:41]

Remember that before you open it. And then when you remember it, then again, be still with remembering that and quiet with that. If you never open the Lotus Sutra, it's just in front of you and you're sitting with it like that, you are studying the Lotus Sutra and practicing the Lotus Sutra. You don't have to open it or even read the title. Or you can just read the title. Just say, Wondrous Dharma Flower Sutra. That's enough. Especially if you say it when you're silent and still. You do not have to open the book and read anything more than the title.

[116:45]

You don't even have to read the title. And you don't even have to be silent and still. You don't have to be. However, I recommend it. Because if you're silent and still without opening the Lotus Sutra you'll understand it. And then sometime you might feel like I want to open it and I've had some problems with it so here we go. So you open it and you continue to remember to be silent and still. Don't try to finish a page when you're reading a page. The main thing is you're not trying to get anything from the sutra, you're giving your presence, you're offering yourself to the sutra. You're offering yourself to the Buddha. You're offering yourself to the Sangha. That's what you're doing. You're not trying to get something from the Lotus Sutra. And if you are giving yourself to the Lotus Sutra and you read the Lotus Sutra and suddenly it starts to give you something, and then you notice yourself

[117:54]

grasping it, I would say close the book and go back to just sitting quiet. And after you close the book, you might still be clinging to what you read. Just be silent and still with that. If we try to get something from the Lotus Sutra, the Lotus Sutra will try to get something from us. If you try to grasp the Lotus Sutra, it'll seem like it's grasping you. But if you're giving yourself to the Lotus Sutra, the Lotus Sutra won't grab you. It'll give itself to you. But again, sometimes if you lose your attention and start getting into understanding it or getting something from it, then you're at risk of being got, of being grasped. So it's best to stop then because you don't have to finish this book. It's a matter of entering it at any point, including the cover, including not even opening it.

[119:00]

So that's how I want to study the Lotus Sutra. Just be still with it. And when Suzuki Roshi was alive, I had a room next to his. And I would often keep, when I was in the room, I would often keep the door open so he could see me and stick his head in if he wanted to and tell me something or ask me something or ask me to help him with something. And sometimes he would look in and find me studying the Lotus Sutra and he would find me sitting reading the Lotus Sutra. He didn't know what I was reading, but he liked the posture I was in when I was reading it. When he saw me sitting, reading whatever it was, which, again, might have been the Lotus Sutra, he said, that's the way to study. In other words, study in silence and stillness.

[120:04]

And if you lose the silence and stillness, strictly speaking, I would suggest stop reading and recover your composure, sister. And then when you're composed again, Maybe you won't want to read anything. That's fine. You're doing the work of the sutra. The Lotus Sutra says, go sit in a quiet place and take care of your practice. When you're doing that, you're following the teaching of the Lotus Sutra. And then, sitting in a quiet place, taking care of your practice, you might say, I'd like to read the Lotus Sutra. And you pick it up. Oh, hello. Hello. Okay? So that's how I would suggest you study anything, if possible. And that's how to study your daughter. Give yourself to her. Don't try to get her. If you try to get her, she'll get you. She has been...

[121:12]

very interested in this retreat. She has actually participated quite a lot listening. She likes to listen to you. And she especially loves to join the service. And she does full prostrations. She's... I haven't tried to make her do that, but she has... Very good. Don't try to make her, please. She asked if she could borrow my rakatsu. Yes, I mean, she bows when she's, I don't know, she has this extremely happy face while she's bowing and then I hope I'm not a Zen fundamentalist to get very happy about that.

[122:18]

I think you're a fundamentalist if you hold on to that happiness. So we're all at risk of being a Zen fundamentalist. We're all at risk of grasping the joy of Zen. When we grasp it, we're becoming fundamentalist. Yeah, I think I am. Yeah, that happens sometimes. So then you confess and repent. Oh, I'm sorry. I got a hold of Zen. I'm sorry. I got a hold of the joy in practice. I'm so sorry. I didn't give it away. I tried to keep it all for myself or for my girl. I would like to confess and say that I'm sorry to you that many times I feel I haven't been respectful of you because I got so attached and

[123:40]

I feel very sorry about that. Thank you. So if it's a good teacher, the teacher helps you not be attached to the teacher. You have helped me. So I think I am less attached now, at least. Yeah, Suzuki Roshi helped me not be attached to Suzuki Roshi. He tolerated my attachment, but he also helped me give it up. And realized that giving it up, then I became, you know, his disciple.

[124:53]

And I gave up my attachment to him. And maybe he was even attached to me. And he got over that, I hope. Did you see, did you... to get over that attachment to him, did you consciously work on that or did it naturally happen? Well, like, you know, just noticing the attachment is the key ingredient in letting it go. Noticing it without beating myself up. On the day I was ordained, I was ordained with one other person, and the thought crossed my mind that our teacher likes him better than me. And that was a little painful.

[125:57]

But I accepted it and got over it. It's kind of like, even if he likes other people better than me, I'm still gonna study with him. And my mind might still make that calculation. That actually did. You know, he seemed to really enjoy other students more than he enjoyed me all the time. But I said, I don't care. I'm still going to just, he's going to have to deal with me. Anyway, even if he doesn't want to, I'm going to be available. And he'll notice that. So my mind did that. And yeah, I kept getting over it every time it happened. And I knew he loved the other students. I knew he loved them. I knew it. And I could live with that. Because I got to study with him.

[127:07]

If that's the price of studying with him is that he loves a lot of other people, okay, that's fine with me. Sometimes people say to me, do you love me? I say, yes. And then they say, but you say that to everybody, don't you? And I say, yes. I do have another question, but I don't want to take up too much time if it's many others in a row. Is it a big question? I basically just, no, maybe I can make it short. It's okay. I wonder if when compassion arises in us and grows in us and we open up, does that often come along with sorrow, a great sorrow and a great pain?

[128:13]

Yeah. Well, like when I do something unskillful and I notice it and I acknowledge it, I might feel sorrow about it. So that sorrow, in a way, that sorrow is compassion. Sorrow for being unskillful is a kind of compassion. Yeah. But if I see someone else doing something, hurting themselves, I might feel sorrow. And that might, again, be my door to compassion, to be with them. I'm sorry that they're suffering. Yes. Compassion is in solidarity with endless varieties of sorrow. Because I felt this last year that this... I get these great waves of compassion flow in me, but alongside with it, it's a great pain or a great sorrow.

[129:22]

That's normal. I mean, compassion is right alongside great. Great compassion is inseparable from great sorrow. However, great compassion with great sorrow is also great joy. Sorrow by itself is not necessarily joyful. But compassion with sorrow is joyful. So we learn to hold more and more sorrow and pain, or not like we hold it, but that compassion holds it. Part of compassion is to develop the capacity, which is patience, to be with it. Like if your daughter's in pain, you feel sorrow. But you're happy to feel sorrow when she's in pain because you love her. You wouldn't be happy to feel no sorrow when she has pain.

[130:28]

She's in pain, you feel sorrow. It's a joy to feel sorrow because you love someone. Mm-hmm. That's the joy of compassion. Thank you so much, Rib. Thank you so much, Sri Lanka. We have an offering from Barbara. Good morning, Tenshin Roshi, and good morning, great assembly. I'm here to say hello and to show myself and, um, and meet you.

[131:40]

And, um, This idea of time has been coming to me a lot during this retreat, this linear progression of time. So 18 years ago, I was at Green Gulch, and I was being asked, how did I feel about being ready to go to Tassajara? And I didn't like the question, and I didn't have an answer because I didn't feel ready. And it was painful because, um, of my history. I have a history of being asked to leave when I was young. Like when I was 13, I was, I had to leave my family and go to a boarding school.

[132:46]

And so it brought up a lot of that trauma and I didn't have the, uh, presence to express that. And, um, I don't think I ever, I'm really happy for this opportunity to say something about that. It's just, I'm just finding here I am after I'm at Zen Center. I seem to have been driven in some way to be at Zen Center and somehow after all these years, I kind of forgot about my relationship with you. I kind of went to Tassajara and then practiced and here I am.

[133:50]

Of all places, here you are. And, you know, I was recently feeling, just wanted to share the fruits of my practice that I've noticed. And two things. One is something's lifted and my face sometimes smiles now. And it never smiled before. And there's some lifting of that. And it's been a big gift. And the other thing is the pandemic has taught me lately I live alone and I practice alone. And being alone is always for as long since I've been kind of alone.

[134:53]

sent away at the age of 13. I kind of have been alone most of that time with others. But I've just realized in the pandemic that I need other people and I need contact and I need to love people and I need to reach out. And it's like the beauty of the Valokiteshvara's prayer. of reaching out and that's something I haven't been able to do easily and I think as a child I didn't know how to reach out for comfort and I comforted myself all the time and I'm now realizing I want I need other people and I want to engage with other people and I want to you know practice with other people and And I also wanted to say that being here with you and your teachings has given me something very, which I named as, what was the word?

[136:14]

It's like grounding. I feel grounded. I've been practicing often my own and your teachings have always informed me, but I feel like this resonance has been helping me to kind of come back to just has been helpful. I can't remember exactly how to express it, but I think that's mainly what's come to me to say. So I wanted to say thank you very much for keeping me in your heart and keeping me connected to you, because I feel that. And also, I'm sorry for the ways that I have not shown up wholeheartedly and any, for the upset that I caused you once at Tassajara, um, for that and for, um, not showing myself as I am.

[137:24]

And just to say so much gratitude to this practice and to everyone in the assembly and everyone at Zen center who supported me to, to grow and, um, find my voice and to practice. So, thank you very much. And I say thanks to the whole universe for keeping you in my heart. Thank you, universe. Thank you to all the teachers and the great bodhisattvas and all of your practice and expression. We'll hear an offering from Ulla.

[138:25]

Thank you. Do you hear me? Okay. Dear Reb and dear Great Assembly, I'm very happy to be here and I'm very touched of all I hear. I'm sitting here in Stockholm, in Sweden. It's so good to be together. And it's a good idea to have this period, practice, how do you call it, this January intense in this way, because it's not so easy to come to Green Gulch all the time. And what I feel is, after almost one year in isolation, I feel that every meeting I have is very rare and very exciting. very dear. If you are isolated, as Manny said, maybe, you feel every meeting is so important.

[139:48]

Getting a new value to meet people. Because you feel really that you need other people, especially to practice with. So, And there's many things I heard that I resonate with. For example, this to regret things in life. But I also thought about what I didn't regret, what I didn't miss. And I remember when I met you first time, I was so happy that I took that possibility to ask you for being my teacher. Sure. And it was a very strong meeting for me. And it started a very intense teaching because I went to Green Gulch directly after for practice period without asking before.

[140:54]

I just bought a ticket before I knew I could come. So... I was glad that you accepted me in this way. So it was a... I didn't think about asking first. I just bought the ticket. I was so keen to come. So I'm grateful for this possibility to be your... study with you. To have you as my teacher. And... There are many thoughts that come up. I had a difficult time, and this has helped me a lot to be in this assembly and to listen to all different things. And I think also the Lotus Sutra is quite magic. And when I study a lot in India, I think India is a very magic country because they have a tradition of magic things.

[141:58]

So it's not so difficult to understand Lotus Sutra if you see how it is in India, the tradition there. Everything is very magic there. They have very strong tradition of magic things. So it's good to... Try to work with your imagination. Because we are so forced in this science to study everything scientifically. So we need more magic in our life to understand that life is very magic. I think. Or what about you? I think life is a magical creation. There are so many things we don't understand.

[143:00]

So it's easy to just be narrow-minded. And narrow-mindedness is a magical creation. Yes, but it's not so good to be caught up in it. It's not so good to be caught up in anything. No, that's why you need imagination. Yeah. You need imagination to get caught up and you need imagination to become free. Yeah. It's part of the deal. So it's freedom belong for. Yes. The freedom of reality. Yes. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. Hello Tenshin Roshi and hello Great Assembly.

[144:31]

I'm joining from Spain tonight. And I also wanted to express my appreciation. I never got the chance to attend any of your Dharma talks, but I listened to your talks online. And I really enjoyed the exchange with the students and with participants to your events. I have learned a lot with those exchanges. And I really admire your ability to read between the lines. You seem to really understand what is beyond the words. And that's so inspiring. I hope to learn how to do that.

[145:36]

I'm very grateful for these three weeks. I've really enjoyed the teachings and some of the stories you told. I think it helped me to understand myself better, like the story, the parable of the lost soul. I think I now understand better why I work so hard. And I have so many questions, but we don't have time. So thank you also for the story you told about Suzuki Roshi and his feet. What a beautiful story. So... Maybe I have a couple of questions. One question I have for you is, recently I listened to a talk by Hoitsu Suzuki. And he said that his father had a dream that he had to go to the US. And he went.

[146:39]

And he said, in the talk, Hoisu said that his father, Suzuki Roshi, thought that the mind of the great sage of India was in the US, was in America. That's why he had to go there. And I wonder if you would like to say something about that. And how do you see that now? How do you see that? Well, right now, I see that Suzuki Roshi was right. The mind of the great sage of India is in America. And it also, although he didn't say so, it's also in Spain. So the way I hear that was the mind of the great sage of India was in the United States. And he felt he had to go there to show us that it was here.

[147:44]

He had to come here so we could see that the mind of the great sage is in this country, in the middle of all of our problems. It's in Spain too, and in France, and in Italy, and Sweden, and Denmark, and England, and Scotland, and India, The mind of the great sage of India is in India. But Suzuki Roshi had made a big effort to learn English. So he came to America to help us discover. He came to help us discover the mind of the great sage. That's the way I hear the story. And he would have gone other places if he had time and spoke the language of those other places. But I didn't hear in the story that Japan didn't have the great sage of India. I think Japan also, it's there too.

[148:46]

And it's in Korea and China and Vietnam and Cambodia and Burma. The great sage's mind is everywhere in the universe. But Suzuki Roshi's specialty was Japanese and English. Wow. So he came to America where he could use his good English and get better at it. And he did come and he did help us to orient towards and discover that mind. Thank you, Hoitsu, for telling us that. Thank you. Next question. The other question is for next time. Okay. May there be next times. I hope so. Take care. Yeah. We have an offering.

[149:47]

Your English is good, too. You can come to America and help us. We have time for one more offering from Mary S. Mary S., Mary Sheldell. The one and the same. Hello, Rob. Hello, Mary. Are you teaching art to children? No, I have a childlike fascination with making art, though. Your artwork is wonderfully childlike. That's great. Thank you. It is extremely childlike. You look like you're in an art class in a school. Well, this is what I've been doing mostly with my pandemic isolation is making childlike art.

[150:51]

Yeah. I raised my hand at the very last minute thinking I'll never get called on, but at least I'll know that I raised my hand. And you got to show your art. I did. Maybe that's all I needed to do. Those are great offerings to the Lotus. That's sweet. Great offerings to the Great Assembly. We're enjoying them. Yeah. Yeah, I'm not really sure what else I have to say. I really feel like I'm in my infancy with the Lotus Sutra. It is kind of enough for me to have it, to open it, to be still with it.

[151:54]

I get very triggered by words that sound like they're asking for my faith in something. I'm very challenged by that, I think, because of how I grew up. I think you're familiar with the tribe that I grew up in, the Norwegian Lutheran family in Minnesota. ideas of faith are very challenging to me. They tend to trigger a lot of painful memories of what looked a lot like hypocrisy to me as a child, that, you know, my parents were very wonderful people and they had great faith in Christianity. But to me it looked like the appearance of faith and what happened underneath didn't look like faith to me.

[153:13]

So, yeah, so a lot of times I'm ready to jump off the ship, you know, I'm ready to grab my life jacket and just jump in the water and swim away because I feel like I might be asked to have faith in something that I can't see, that I can't touch. And I don't trust that. And it makes me deeply uncomfortable sometimes. So you heard me say earlier, I don't trust stuff, right? You don't trust what? I don't trust words. I don't trust these appearances you're talking about. I don't trust them either. I trust the practice. So when I see the appearance of inauthentic faith, if I would see that, I don't trust that. If I see the appearance of authentic faith, I don't trust that appearance.

[154:19]

So when you see these things that trigger you, it's time to put your life vest on and sit down. You don't have to read it. You don't have to read one more syllable. Just you've got this thing to work with now. Sit down. And maybe you'll sit down and do some more artwork to help you deal with this trigger. But you don't have to do the artwork. You can just sit down and be quiet with this difficult feeling, which nobody taught you to do that when you were a kid with these appearances, these painful appearances. So I don't trust those appearances either. And I don't trust maybe the appearance of anything. What do I trust? I trust practicing compassion with these appearances. So if you see something triggering in the Lotus Sutra, again, I would say, stop.

[155:22]

Stop in the name of the law. And be still and quiet with that trigger. And calm down with it. And then you can understand what the triggering is about. which the triggering can be a Dharmagate to the thing that's most important to you. But first of all, you have to stop and practice with the trigger. Don't keep reading. Don't stick your head in what's triggering you. Sit down with it and put your life vest on. That's what I trust. Thank you. That's very helpful. That's very helpful. Thank you. I'd also like to just say thank you for my Dharma name, which has been a great source of study for me and a great, I think as somebody else said, a great koan to discover am I the patient phoenix and is that who I am?

[156:43]

Why did you give me that name? And it's been a wonderful journey with the name. So thank you. Yeah, you're welcome. Thank you, Sister Grisha, for giving me my name. Yeah. It's been a 50-year revelation. Good. Well, hopefully I'll get another 30 or 40 years out of this one. Hopefully. Thank you. Thank you. Thanks for raising your hand. You're welcome. Okay, gentle people. We have reached the hour where we say, May the merit of our reading, our recitation, our study, our copying, our practice of the Lotus Sutra extend to every being and place.

[157:57]

And may we, together with all beings, realize the Buddha way. Beings are numberless. I vow to save them. Afflictions are inexhaustible. I vow to cut through. Dharma gates are boundless. I vow to enter them. The Buddha way is unsurpassable. I vow to become it.

[158:33]

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