Good morning. Welcome to the opening session for Aspects of Practice. The auspicious dharma brain is lightly falling. It's amazing the way it just sort of started while we were sitting that last period. It's very light. I can hardly make it out. freshens the air. At the end of the day, we'll have a short opening ceremony to open this practice period, but really we're already well begun. So for the next four weeks, what the general subject of study is, what we've been calling the heart of our forms.

[01:01]

And these so-called forms are everywhere in the Zen tradition. I was looking for particular pieces to excerpt from Zen Mind Beginner's Mind and it was almost impossible because it was sort of woven into the entire book. But actually, let me just say, I do have, if people want it, I made, I went through some of Suzuki Roshi archival stuff and made about four or five pages of excerpts, which would be easy to either to email or to make copies. We'll get to this, but Suzuki Roshi often talked about forms and precepts interchangeably. We'll come back to that. At any rate, this aspect of practice is led by senior students.

[02:10]

Many of, almost all of you are here, so this year the people who are leading discussions and classes and lectures and teas are St. Peter, Ross, Lori, going around to Ron, Karen, Leslie, and Greg. You were right, closely. And also David Weinberg. So they'll be doing lectures and giving you some instruction in the forums, but also opening up discussion about what it is we're doing and why this, and how this has meaning for us. So that's the basic subject for my lecture today. I think this really fits well with, it sort of segues from Sojan Roshi's lecture yesterday.

[03:18]

I think probably many of you were there. As he's preparing to leave for Tassajara, he talked in a broad way about monastic practice. And as he sort of came around at the end, one thing that he was saying, which I think is completely on the mark, He said, there was an exchange, I think, between him and Sochin and Roshi and Ross. Sochin and Roshi said, when he goes to Tassajara, he feels right at home. And then Ross, you said something like, well, how do you feel here? Well, he said, he didn't say he feels at home when he comes back for him to illuminate that side.

[04:23]

I think within that is the essential point of this practice is to feel home wherever you are. Whatever circumstances we encounter, to be at home, even in the midst of discomfort, but also to find freedom. in the midst of any activity, and that the model for this, where we learn and cultivate this, I think, is in Zazen practice. That's, I think, the core principle of our school, and of all of our teachers. But the root of these forms are you could say they're in this monastic practice and it's really good to have a taste of that kind of life that sometime in our life if we're able to do that sometimes circumstances don't permit it and when you have that opportunity

[05:44]

One of the things that you see, if you go to Tassajara or you go to some other monastery, you see how much that's also the flavor, without being monastic, it's the flavor of the practice that we have here. In a sense, Well, they're just one practice to my mind, with different emphases. And here, we're doing sashin today. For some people, one day sitting is really difficult. It's a little daunting to face. For some people it's not so difficult. And the difficulty of course is quite varied. Sometimes the difficulty is in just sitting cross-legged.

[06:49]

Sometimes the difficulty is in settling one's mind. But the reason that we create a form, if you will, that's difficult, and to have a Zen practice that is not so easy to do, is that our method is to lead us, sooner or later, to face ourselves. To face ourselves And the way we do that is by facing our difficulties and our suffering. I think yesterday in a lecture Sojan said something like this, if we don't meet our suffering we can't be enlightened. It's not likely.

[07:53]

Of course in our heart of hearts, in our secret deluded heart we actually want our suffering disappear, then I would be enlightened. But the path in is through our difficulties. So to put it in another way, until we find ourselves in a narrow place, it's impossible to know the real vastness of the world. So, you know, if you go to a monastery, if you go to a Japanese monastery, you know, as a novice, actually Catherine did this at a monastery, she said, you sleep, you slept in the zendo, right? You sleep on one tatami mat. How long did you do that? Two years. Two years. Sleeping in the zendo. Right.

[08:56]

That's your room. One of these mats. with a little cubby for your belongings. So you're sleeping right next to Monk and you become intimate with people's farting and snoring and turning and you know, it actually, we did this at Ritza when it was quite wonderful. You drop your preferences. Also you're so tired you just go to sleep. But in a monastery you sleep like that. You change in and out of your robes several times a day. The schedule is just... Schedule is not so hard, necessarily. But it's kind of relentless. It's sort of an exoskeleton for our practice and it's constant and you follow it because that's the rhythm of life and you fall into that rhythm and you encounter yourself you encounter your resistances but I should say in this expression that Thich Nhat Hanh has which I love suffering is not enough it doesn't all boil down to suffering

[10:26]

there's also joy. In that rhythm there's a joy and release and freedom and recognition of doing it together with your sisters and brothers and all moving through this activity together. Sometimes you might want to run And sometimes you might feel how amazing it is, how lucky I am to have fallen into this. So, that's kind of, within this monastic practice we have all these forms. And within our practice we have all these forms. We have forms of bowing, eating, serving. We have the form of our body in Sazen, we have in these forms another core message, which is not to treat anything or anyone like an object.

[11:44]

What that means is to live subjectively That is, everything that you encounter is part of you, and you are part of everything that you encounter. So, for example, we handle our bowls and meals carefully, quietly, trying not to make any extra sound, and respectfully. We hold them respectfully. In service, when we turn our masks, which is the style in this temple, we turn our mat so we bend down to turn it by hand rather than more conveniently chipping it with our foot. We try when we're setting up the zendo on Saturdays not to just drop the zafus, plop them on place, but actually place them as if

[12:54]

it was part of your body or your friend's body. So the question is how does this training and the forms that we encounter, how do they infuse our life and then what is the meaning of our life? Some of you may have read, I remember reading Rev. Anderson's book, Being Upright, which is excellent. It's a book on the precepts. And he presented, and I had never read this before, what's actually the Soto Zen version of the pure precepts. We recite the pure precepts during Bodhisattva ceremony.

[13:56]

basically avoid all evil, do all good, save all sentient beings. Is that familiar? The Soto version is the first one. That's where I got stuck. I vow to embrace and sustain all forms and ceremonies. seems a little different than avoid all evil and I just noticed I had so much resistance to that even though I love the forms and I've been thinking about that for years and I think I've basically come to terms with it and I'm willing to embrace and sustain the vow to embrace and sustain all ceremonies and forms.

[15:06]

But what this is, I've had to think really closely and look at my own life in a sense, perhaps, it's about recognizing and respecting one's entire life. That Zazen itself is a form and in a sense a ceremony but it begs the question of what is a ceremony? We think of a ceremony as something or I think of a ceremony as something special and holy and kind of the word, or you could use ritual and then from ritual you go to ritualistic which feels in our culture kind of dead but not necessarily if you think of Zazen, when I think of Zazen as ritual

[16:22]

And I think what they're getting at in this framing of the precept is that all of our lives are holy. All of our life is precious. Everything that we do is worthy of respect. of being thought of and acted through with respect and that that's just the way to live. While I was looking prepared for this lecture I found a really good piece by Sojan Roshi that gets at this.

[17:30]

It was from a lecture he gave in North Carolina in I think 1996 and you can find it on the web. He says, although we talk about the form of Zen, there is no special form. Since Zen is nothing more than the practice of our life, it follows that whatever forms our life takes can be the forms of practice. Even though that is so, it doesn't mean that we are always aware of them as such. So our predecessors developed certain recognizable forms like sasana, bowing and chanting, and holding our hands this way and our bowls this way. And when we enter these forms, we can recognize practice. we can see it because it has a shape. So we call it formal practice and we can use it day after day and find our way.

[18:33]

And then at the end of this paragraph he says, it's sometimes hard to know how to bring forth the mind of practice within the forms of everyday life. How can we do zazen all day without crossing our legs? So, to do zazen all day without crossing our legs is embracing and sustaining forms and ceremonies. Having said that, let me come at this from another angle and share with you a koan. This is a koan. This is case 16 in the Mumman koan. And it's very short. These are the words of Master Uman, or Yunmen, who lived from the early to the middle of the 10th century.

[19:50]

in China. It's one line. Yunmin asked his community, The world is vast and wide. Why do you put on your robe at the sound of a bell? The world is vast and wide. Why do you put on your robe at the sound of a bell? I'm not going to go into the comment or the verse, but what Eken Roshi says in his taisho on this is, Yunmin is not challenging us at the level of propriety. He is not asking why one should be prompt. He's not even suggesting that one should be prompt.

[20:52]

Ultimately, in this koan, the robe is not even important. It's not about the Buddhist way of doing things, necessarily, or not the formal way of doing things. But it is suggesting, perhaps, that as we practice we're actualizing an ancient way or an ancestral way the way that this practice is the way that the practice is passed from warm hand to warm hand but really the way just our true humanity exists, apart from any formal idea of practice.

[22:06]

I think what's important is, in the koan, what Yunmin is asking is, how can I be free right within my conditioned life? The conditioned life that exists as a particular expression of a reality that we can't even begin to say anything about. So, the question that you usually, if you're doing this in koan practice, what you often do is boil down the koan to one or two or three words that you carry in your mind as you sit, as you breathe. The question of this is, in this koan, is why?

[23:11]

Now, around these parts, usually, why is, as a question, is frowned upon. It's you know, when something comes up that we don't understand what we're encouraged to do rather than ask why, why am I doing this the encouragement is to answer yes hi and to inquire how how do I do this How is a very fruitful question. But I think that the why of this koan is a different why.

[24:17]

It's a why that's beyond our ordinary need for reasons and justifications. It's why at the level of our real existence. And in that sense it contains how. Why do you get out of bed when you hear the baby crying? Why do you pick up the phone when it rings? Why do you stop at the red light? These are all forms. These activities are like creating the world that we live in, but from within the world, not from outside.

[25:25]

Why do you sit cross-legged in the zendo? And why do you get up when the bell rings at the end of the period? So these forms are ... this is the stuff that we weave the whole tapestry of our life out of. They create the world that we live in. Without them, things go off the tracks. So, each particular form that we do here in the Zen Dojo, the particular forms are worthy of respect. Each one does have a function. It tends not to be completely abstract.

[26:32]

And also, each one is empty, or provisional, or maybe a skillful means. So, for example, we're talking about turning our mats. Most zendo, the way zendo is traditionally structured, the altar is in the middle, and the mats are facing the altar. you wouldn't turn your mats. Here, what we do for the beginning of service is we angle towards the altar, and then we turn our mats as we face each other. That's a Berkeley Zen center form. Even in Yunmin's koan, why do you put on your robe at the sound of the bell? So, in the morning, in a monastery, some very fortunate soul gets to run around with a bell and clang it before anyone is awake, and that wakes you up.

[27:53]

Here we are in the city. Most of you don't get here that early, but every morning One of the residents goes around and does the clappers. Usually not too loud. You know, does the clappers three times. We did that every day. And we don't use the bell because we don't want to cause a disturbance among our neighbors. And it's interesting. I don't know. We never talked about this at residence. dinner, like, I don't know if there are any residents who actually depend upon the clappers to wake up, are there? I've heard there's one. That may be because the clappers are very close to that person's window, but nevertheless

[28:56]

When I hear them, I feel comforted, and when I don't hear them, I worry. But that's just me. So we've adapted this form for our se. So it's provisional. It's not like these forms are absolute. It's not like the robe is absolute. You go to different places of practice, and the robes, they wear different robes. And it's not like one is more holy than the other or better. It's just, this is the form. So these forms are a kind of bridge. They are meant to carry us from this world of so-called formal practice into the other so-called world of our daily life, but really this is one world.

[30:04]

And one of the forms that we have here is also quite unique. I've never seen it, I've been asking people and looking. When we leave the zendo, we stand at the door, if Sojin Roshi is not there, we stand at the door and give a little shashu bow and walk out, right? You won't see that. I've never seen that any place else. Has anyone? Usually what you do in a zendo is at the door you turn towards the altar and bow. I think that this form emerged, I think it's just about the time that I started coming here. We changed this. And the idea, and I think, again, this is part of the nature of our practice. And this is where it's literally to bridge these two spaces, not worlds, but spaces, the space of the Zen Do, and not to say, I'm closing this activity and bowing to the altar and going into this other world, but just actually

[31:27]

honoring, very lightly, with a little bow, the fact, oh, there's some threshold here. There's some liminal reality, and I'm crossing this, but really, these are not different worlds. And I'm carrying Zazen forward into my day. And I'm carrying this sense of embracing and sustaining the forms. I'm not saying the forms belong in the zendo. I'm actually carrying these forms into the wider world. Now, one of the reasons that we're talking about this during the practice period is that sometimes problems arise with our attitude towards ourselves, essentially.

[32:37]

And sometimes we have the idea, sometimes we're caught in a sense of having to do things right. Sometimes we're caught in the idea of I'm not going to do things right. Holding ourselves too tight and blaming ourselves for imperfection or holding ourselves too loose and blaming the so-called system for irrationality and some kind of religious mumbo-jumbo. What's the middle way? Too tight. Actually Suzuki Roshi had a wonderful expression for this too tightness.

[33:42]

He said, looks like good. And some of us are guilty of that. I think when Sojin we had Ross and I were in the same lay ordination group and the name that Sojin gave me as a Dharma name which is kind of unusual and I think I've talked about this Not the Hozon part. Hozon is very respectable. Dharma Mountain, you know, very traditional. That's okay, pretty good. But the actual Dharma name that was given, which is the second name, is Kushihi, which I don't use so much, which means formless form. And he, I think his idea was, okay, here's a problem for you to work on.

[34:48]

maybe for the rest of your life. So now the rest of my life, because he had an opportunity to change it when I had priest ordination. It was basically don't be stuck on the forms. That's one aspect of it. I could go into more what I think about it, but it's not necessary. But this, finding this middle way, where actually the form And that's what I think I want to close with reading from Suzuki Roshi. This is from May 17, 1970. This morning I want to talk about Zen precepts. As you know, precepts are not just rules.

[35:50]

They are rather our way of life. When we organize our life, there you see something like rules. Even though you are not attending to observe some particular rules, there you can see some rules. As soon as you get up, to wake up completely, you wash your face. That is one of the precepts. This is not the way we usually think of precepts. This is played. He's playing a fort. And at a certain time you eat breakfast. When you become hungry. It looks like you are observing some rules to eat breakfast at some certain time. But it's actually the way of life you follow or you are doing naturally. So if you practice zazen, there's some rules in your practice. So Zazen practice is, at the same time, one of the precepts. If you really understand how Buddhists get the idea of precepts, you will understand the relationship between Zen and precept.

[37:01]

The precept is just our way of life. As Zen students, we put emphasis on our everyday practice, including Zazen practice. But when you think about how to cope with the problem you have in your everyday life, you will realize how important it is to practice zazen. The power of practice will help you in its true sense. What do you think? We're open for a few minutes here. Peter? I was very touched when you talked about as we exit the Zen Dojo. And I've been doing that ever since I came here, and it seemed respectful, but this is the first time I've had the slightest clue of deeper meaning.

[38:11]

And it makes me glad that every year we have aspects of practice and we don't yet know what these various forms mean. We can gain more knowledge about them. Thank you. I think sometimes that question, why? is like the why of the koan. It's not so much about the propriety as about the essence. What is it that we are doing in the world of our life when we do that little shashu bow at the threshold? And I think it's a useful thing to

[39:14]

I guess I've just been thinking of, you know, he said something simple like when we get up in the morning and we wash our face, you know, there's a thought that what I need to do is really structure my life clearly. You know, first I wash my face, then I go to Zazen, then whatever. And that what I discover is that in a temple that's extremely easy to do. And, you know, the more and more you are there, the more it just you know, flows, and in our lives, more engaged with society, it's impossible to do. And I actually was thinking how much I admire Lori, who I've watched for seven or eight years, how always she's really, you know, she has children, she's been responsible here, she has causes she cares about outside in the world, and how, you know, it's always shifting and always changing, and she's always responding. And I always wonder how she does it, because it doesn't seem like there's a rigid form there.

[40:18]

It seems like there's almost a no form, a kind of fluidity to it. And I think if you really cling to our forms, you can't do that. There has to be some way of accepting that I don't know what it is. That's what I observe. Does someone want to respond to that? Sure. Okay, so let me just say, I shouldn't speak for Lori, but what I would say, because I've been living with her for 20 years, you know, I mean, some of it is, you can't distinguish a person's nature from a person's training, in a sense. And one thing I would say about Lori is, she actually, I think she Peter probably had the most monastic training, actually living at Tassajara, but I don't know that that's it.

[41:22]

It's just how you cultivate your life and you have to... I mean she can speak for herself, I don't know if you... You probably don't. But that's what... Tamar, what you're saying though is... That's why I think actually this is very difficult practice. To follow a schedule in a monastery has its own difficulties, but it's pretty clear. To follow the schedule of your moment-by-moment life, which is the point of practice, I think it's very difficult. Thank you. I haven't seen it in a book, but I would just like to go out on a limb to speculate a bit about the vow at the door there, the threshold. I liked your presentation of that.

[42:22]

My understanding is that the Abbot of the temple sits in for the Buddha, and that when we're going out in the other temples where people face the altar and the Buddha before going out, Sojo Roshi is sitting in for the Buddha at you're bowing to the Buddha, not at the altar, but the one in the threshold, and then when we go out into the world, they say see people as Buddha, not as other, but as self. So rather than looking at a statue, before going out, you're actually looking at a living Buddha, and then going out. And again, I haven't seen it written anywhere, and so just to Suzuki Roshi for us to carry on as well. Well, what I, Peter may remember, what I think I understand though is that we do this, but if Sojin Roshi is here, we bow to him directly and then we walk over.

[43:41]

And Suzuki Roshi at a certain point started doing that, started meeting people and was in the door to his office in Sakoji downstairs. who was either at the door or in the service. I can't remember. I mean, I left Sakogya. I can't remember whether we turned to the altar. But anyway, your point is well taken. And the point of meeting each being as Buddha, that's also embracing and sustaining the form of our life, I think. Jake? One of the things I find, personally, very hands-on with form, is that form changes here. And many of the forms, when they change, I'm pleased with, and some I'm not so pleased with. And there was one proposed form change that really set me up in arms.

[44:49]

And that was the proposal to change our Heart Sutra, English version, that we do here. to be what they do at city center in Tassajara. I just found that very interesting. I know my act was so crazy. We didn't change. We didn't change. It's good to watch that sort of thing. We don't like change. That's why we're practicing here. We don't like it when the forms change. Sometimes it's OK. I remember when I came back from Tassajara, After doing a practice period there, you know, I've been sitting here for years. I love sitting here. When I came back from Tassajara, my first feeling was, wait, the wall is too close here. You know, and immediately I thought, this is ridiculous and this is just what I've become, you know, just what I've been doing for the last three months.

[45:50]

now, but I was going to respond to Tamar and sort of confirm her, what I felt were accurate depiction of you. The koan that you mentioned from the Mumonkan and Suzuki Roshi, and then what Tamar was saying seemed to me to be circling around the same point, which is what you said, that the real form we're trying to practice with, is what's presented right here, right now, in the present moment. And the vast sky, or what I take to be in that koan is a euphemism for the absolute, we can only experience the absolute in the particular, in the particular river of every moment. And so the forms themselves, as we practice here, are kind of superficially a koan, because It's staged and choreographed, but the training, as you said, is to allow us to cultivate the ability to do what Gauri does, and that is respond to the form of the moment when it arises, every moment, in its particularity.

[47:12]

And I think that's what Suzuki Roshi is saying in that passage too, is that the real forms are our life, and we respond and create these forms sort of unconsciously or naturally when we pay attention to our life and what our life is asking us to do and what we mean. I think that's a part, that's basically also what Eken Roshi is saying in his commentary and also Shubhayama in his commentary basically said it's not about the role, it's about perceiving that the absolute is there and recognizing that by your activity you are creating the particular and thereby it actually makes a difference what we do. It's not about right or wrong, it's about creating

[48:13]

It's about being in relationship to moment by moment. I think that's the way I understand it. Peter? Going back over some of the same territory, it seems like our so-called formal practice, one of the reasons why we like it and do sometimes find resistance to change, is that it's stable. Here we have some stability that allows us some space to work on our reactions to how we're presented with a particular form of dealing with it. There was a period, right after I did practice period at Tassajara, when something happened.

[49:19]

And it was next year. I believe, actually, Laurie might know about this better, but Rick essentially said, OK, no schedule. Is that right? I wasn't there then. No, but you weren't there. But anyway, he said, no schedule. He got upset. But this freaked everybody out. And it was really interesting. I think it was, from people who were there, it was an amazing practice period, because then each person had to decide what they were going to do. And things fell into patterns. But it was very challenging. We have time for one or two more. There is. James? Well, this was mentioned, but I was just wondering how you think about breaking forms and falling out of forms, and how to practice I mean, I think specifically about my eating bowls last year that I was careless and I dropped them.

[50:24]

I broke one. So now when I look at the ones that I have, I only see the one that I don't have. And I'm very attached to the one that I don't have. And it bothers me a lot. I don't appreciate the ones that I have anymore. I'm sorry. I know that breaking eating bowls is like the worst thing that you can possibly do. Everyone says so. But it's done. Right. But I'm saying, you know, there's something about the finality of that that is very hard to let go of. There's worse things. That's exactly what I was going to say. I can think of a lot worse things. Ross? There's also a teaching of subhuktu, where she's saying, while holding up a teacup, this teacup or this teapot is already broken. Yes. Yeah. It's already broken. And you helped it go a little quicker. Yeah, I mean, there's also, we have to figure out how to let go of our mistakes. And, I would remind myself, there's worse things, you know, worse mistakes that one can make.

[51:36]

I have a hard time letting go of some of the mistakes. And, yeah, I understand. And that's also part of our practice. mistake? PRABHUPĀDA Right. One continuous mistake, including

[51:59]

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