So do I have to repeat all that? Yes. The people in front say no, but the people in the back say yes. I've been lecturing on Zen Master Dogen's Kenjo Koan, and I'm going to continue now. This is the part where Dogen says, Gaining enlightenment is like the moon reflected in the water. The moon does not get wet, nor is the water disturbed. Although its light is extensive and great, the moon is reflected even in a puddle an inch across. The whole moon and the whole sky are reflected in a dew drop on the grass, or in one drop of water. Enlightenment does not disturb the person, just as the moon does not disturb the water. A person does not hinder enlightenment, just as a dew drop does not hinder the moon in the sky.

[01:05]

The depth of the drop is the height of the moon. As for the duration of the reflection, you should examine the water's vastness or smallness, and you should discern the brightness or dimness of the heavenly moon. Earlier, Dogen said, it is not like the moon reflected in the water. It is not like a mirror, or like the moon reflected in the water. And it sounds like a contradiction, but he's simply speaking from two different points of view. when he says, it's not like the moon, enlightenment is not like the moon reflected in the water, it's not like a reflection of the moon in the water, not like the reflection in the mirror, or like the moon in the water. He's emphasizing the oneness, the non-separation,

[02:17]

When there's totally enlightenment, then there's nothing reflected. When there's totally delusion, there's nothing reflected, because there's no two things. When you're sitting zazen and your legs are painful, and you say, I don't like this, then pain becomes a reality. Suffering becomes a reality because there's a separation. So that's the realm of delusion. When you accept pain totally, There's nothing outside of painfulness. Therefore, there's no suffering.

[03:20]

This is enlightenment. Everything is proven in Zazen. And Every problem we have is a koan. People say, I wish I had a koan. You guys in Soto Zen don't give us any koans. Every problem you have is a koan. You just have to recognize it. So when you come to Doksan, when you come to have an interview, you bring your koan, knowingly or unknowingly, because your koan is integral with your problem.

[04:31]

And then I show you what your koan is. So in Zazen, and especially in Sashin, day after day, the same problem keeps coming up, or maybe a different problem comes up, but the problems are not unrelated. And moment after moment, breath after breath, you're working on this koan. How to deal with that? How to deal with suffering? how to deal with discomfort, how to deal with picking and choosing, how to deal with preference, how to deal with like and dislike. So Dogen says here,

[05:41]

gaining enlightenment is like the moon reflecting in the water. The moon does not get wet, nor is the water disturbed. So here he's separating you and enlightenment in order to show you, to show us, that there is such a thing as enlightenment and that it doesn't that it's actually reflected in all of your actions. When we sit in zazen, the light comes forth. There's intrinsic enlightenment and experiential enlightenment. Intrinsically, enlightenment is our nature.

[06:45]

It's not like we can get something called enlightenment. Enlightenment is not a prize or something in a box somewhere. It's just your nature. It's you. But because there's a separation, it doesn't come forth. We don't realize it. So there's intrinsic enlightenment and experiential or realized enlightenment. So when we sit in zazen and we sit through all of our difficulty, because of our difficulty, it's hard to see the light. But even though you're sitting there day after day, struggling or whatever, dealing with the difficulties and the joys,

[08:01]

of Zazen, the light is coming through all of that, all of the brambles. When you look in the mirror after the third day of Zazen, you might be surprised. So then he says, although its light is extensive and great, the moon is reflected even in a puddle an inch across. The whole moon and the whole sky are reflected in a dew drop in the grass, in one drop of water.

[09:04]

Since our nature is enlightenment, or light, this light is permeating everywhere. And it's totally complete in the dew drop, as it's reflected in a dew drop on the grass, or in one drop of water. The moon is reflected in the ocean, and we see this shimmering, wonderful thing. But in each blade of grass, drop of water on the grass, it's also completely illuminated and reflected. As Dogen says, each one of us is Buddha nature. Buddha nature permeates the whole universe.

[10:09]

The whole universe is Buddha nature. Everything reflects it. But as Master Uman says, everyone has their own light, but it's dim and dark. And he says, where is this light? And nobody could answer. So he answered for them. He said, in the pantry at the main gate, in the temple storehouse. Zazen is like, a jar of water, a clear, like a glass of water, scooped out of a stream with leaves and earth, kind of muddy water.

[11:22]

And then, little by little, the dust and the earth and the leaves all settled down to the bottom and the water is clear. And when the water is clear, it becomes transparent, and we can see the light shining through the water, or the water is actually giving off its own light. This is a kind of simile When the mud settles, the light shines forth because it's always there. When the clouds part, the sun shines because it's just there. But it's always shining. Sun is always shining. The water, even though it's muddy, is always clear.

[12:29]

water runs through the earth and cleans itself, and then it comes up and collects particles. But whether it's cloudy or clear, water itself is always clean and pure. But it's hard to see it when it's not clean, when it's obscured. So then he says, enlightenment does not disturb the person, just as the moon does not disturb the water.

[13:48]

So even though the moon is reflecting in the water, the water is not disturbed, and the moon is not disturbed. They complement each other. They harmonize with each other. It's because they are each other. The moon is the moon, the water is the water, but the moon is the water and the water is the moon. Form is emptiness and emptiness is form, but form is form and emptiness is emptiness. Even though you mix them up, form is form and water and emptiness is emptiness. Water is water and moon is moon. So enlightenment does not destroy the person. It's simply because it's our nature.

[14:59]

And then a person does not hinder enlightenment, just as a dew drop does not hinder the moon in the sky. The dew drop receives the moon. There's an old saying, the oyster swallows the moon. And then he says, the depth of the drop is the height of the moon. As for the duration of the reflection, you should examine the water's vastness or smallness and you should discern the brightness or dimness of the heavenly moon. The depth of the drop is the height of the moon, so the moon is this high and then the understanding is proportional to the height of the moon.

[16:04]

The depth of understanding is proportional to the height of the moon. the moon this high, some of us the moon is this high, and our understanding is here, and our understanding is maybe here, but enlightenment is enlightenment. Some have big, some have it small, but it's the same quality, it's the same animal. And, as Dogen says, some may realize it and some may not. Even though enlightenment is there, some may realize it and some may not. is integral with practice.

[17:12]

We say one hour of practice is one hour of enlightenment, but you shake your head and you say, I didn't see that. What do you mean? I just had painful legs, and my back hurt, and my mind wandered. I was just thinking of my laundry list. Where's the enlightenment? As Dogen says, some may realize it and some may not. But it's okay not to realize it. The important thing is practice. Enlightenment is important also, but enlightenment goes with practice just like your shadow goes with you.

[18:21]

But we don't realize it because we think enlightenment is something different than what we're doing. How could this be enlightenment? We have an idea that enlightenment is this shining thing, and once we have enlightenment, everything will be perfect, and then we can just go about our business without any problems. Yes? Can somebody with big enlightenment suffer less than someone with small enlightenment? Someone with big enlightenment can accept big suffering. Someone with small enlightenment can accept small suffering. But I'm not ready for questions yet. I'm trying to get back to my train of thought.

[19:34]

Um. Um. I'm trying to remember what I was saying. Because we have this idea about what enlightenment is, we can't see it because of our view, our imagination. As soon as we let go of the imaginative concept, It's right in front of us.

[20:41]

I remember Suzuki Roshi saying, you may think that if you're the kind of person that likes ice cream, that after you've been enlightened and you walk by the ice cream store, you won't want ice cream anymore. That's just a view. But an enlightened person is enlightened about their craving for ice cream, but that doesn't mean that they still won't have a taste for it. Life goes along in a realm of desire, and we're always working with desire, always working with it.

[21:53]

You may think once you're enlightened, you won't have any desire anymore. There are all these stereotypes that you read about in books. But practice is not like what you read about in books, exactly. And people are not exactly like the people that you read about in books, exactly. And books tend to mythologize, and they tend to particularize, and they tend to exaggerate, and they become fact becomes fiction, which is okay, and the books are inspiring, but it's not exactly like real life. In real life,

[23:00]

But they don't tell you about that in the book. So, the person does not hinder enlightenment, just as the dewdrop does not hinder the moon The depth of the drop is the height of the moon. As for the duration of the reflection, you should examine the water's vastness or smallness, and you should discern the brightness or dimness of the heavenly moon. So, basically, the purpose of practice is to allow this light to shine forth for yourself and for others, and just for the sake of letting it come out.

[24:24]

Also, you know, Dogen is saying that in each action, the totality of Buddha nature is there in your most minute activity. Taking a step, you take a step with the full power of the universe. It takes the full power of the universe and the whole universe is behind that step, or right within that step, within all of our actions.

[25:40]

This is why in Soto Zen, as it's practiced in Japan, it's a very careful practice, very precise, mindful, careful practice. in each activity. It's like recognizing that power and taking care of things very carefully, always taking care of things very carefully. somebody said, one phrase is the result of a lifetime. In other words, you are right here, we are all right here on this moment, and the way we act on this moment

[26:47]

all of our actions and habits in the past being expressed on this moment. And a person with a discerning eye can see into a person's character, watching how you do something in just a tiny way. your whole character is expressed in the way you do something in just a tiny way. So it doesn't matter whether you're large or small, whether you have a large capacity or a small capacity, Buddha nature is expressed in some way through you.

[28:03]

And the question is, how do you want to express yourself? How do you want to, what do you want to have happen? If we're practicing, if you're a Zen student, what do you want to have happen? What do you want to express? See, practice is not to get something. Whenever we go someplace to do something, we want something, but Zen practice is not utilitarian. If I practice, will I be better at my job? Will I act better at home? You know, we have all these questions. Will I be a better person? You probably will. But practice is simply to open yourself so that this light is not hindered.

[29:20]

so that you're not an obstacle. It's not a selfish practice. So, Dogen says, a person does not hinder enlightenment, just as the dew drop does not hinder the moon in the sky. The depth of the drop is the height of the moon. As for the duration of the reflection, you should examine the water's vastness or smallness, and you should discern the brightness or dimness of the heavenly moon. Bright or dim? Is it bright or is it dim? You know, Tozan had a saying.

[30:31]

which I've read before, says, the blue mountain is the parent of the white cloud, and the white cloud is the child of the blue mountain. A nice image. All day long, they depend on each other without depending on each other. The blue mountain is always the blue mountain. The white cloud is always the white cloud. This is like the moon and the water, the mountain and the cloud. They're always reflecting each other, but they don't hinder each other. They depend on each other, but they're independent of each other. No, Nancy, did you have a question?

[31:46]

I need to answer it right now. OK. Today is Seshin, but we have time for a question. If you have a question. Charlie. You mentioned several different translations when you started this series of lectures. Oh, there are a number of translations. Well, I use them all. But the one that I rely on mostly is Myzumi Roshi. Nizami Roshi's translation and commentary.

[32:47]

There's very little commentary, but Karas Thanahashi and I translated the Keiteki, which is an old commentary from the 16th century, 17th century. And that's, I haven't, we translated it and then I put it aside, and then I just started reading it during Sashin. I remembered it, and we haven't published it yet, and I like it. I thought we did a good job after I started reading it, but I couldn't tell until I set it aside for a while.

[33:49]

and handle big suffering. By handling big suffering, do you mean that they experience it more as pain rather than suffering? Well, you know, a person with big capacity can take in the suffering of the world. person with small capacity is put off, or it can't, it's too much. And when that person takes on the suffering, is it still, does it, is it more like pain or more like suffering? Well, a person that takes on the big suffering can experience it all in some way.

[35:12]

Of course, everyone's experience is their own experience. You can't experience someone else's experience, but you can understand it and you can feel something, right? But at the same time, you have to be independent of it, otherwise you'd be totally choked. So, you know, there's so much suffering in the world, and to take all that suffering in and actually experience it with no way to be independent, you'd be instantly crushed. So, to be able to experience that, to take it in and realize it, not let go of it, and at the same time to have some detachment, some independence, so that you can act clearly and see clearly.

[36:23]

It's like a surgeon also has to be able to eat their dinner. It's like when you go home, if you're a psychiatrist, you have to leave your patients in the office. Otherwise, you'd be totally obsessed all the time and incapable of doing anything. Enlightenment, in that case, would be to be engaged and at the same time not attached. Sympathetic, totally sympathetic, and at the same time able to let go of things. To engage and let go at the same time. Well, it's possible, you know.

[37:42]

We have our limits, but at the same time, we don't know our real limits. A person of great capacity is contained within a person of small capacity, I would say. Otherwise, we wouldn't be able to do sasheen, because you wouldn't do this on your own. You wouldn't think, oh, I'm going to sit there for five days and see what happens, without moving. You wouldn't do that on your own. But because you are naive, and we enter into this asheen, then you say, I didn't know this was going to happen. But you bring out something in you that you didn't know you had. you bring forth something, you bring forth a greater capacity than you would have thought you had. So yes, the person of great capacity is hidden within the person of small capacity.

[38:49]

And when the challenge comes, then you bring that forth. That's the spirit of practice. This morning we had a well-being service for the victims of torture. And as I was sitting, facing the wall, experiencing what I was experiencing, I was suddenly connected with that. That was sort of an abstract concept of a well-being family. My own discomfort and pain opened me up to that, because I'm compassionate about that. Well, that's right. And I was very choked about my own suffering and the world's, a lot of the time, sitting there and not detached from it.

[39:56]

But I think that's probably part of the step that's necessary, at least for me. But the question arises about all this suffering. and it just, it was overwhelming, and I'm crying about it, is why? Why what? Why is it this way? You know, maybe that's a question that's like, not useful to look at, but that's what came up. Why? Why is this? There's so much. Well, I don't know. You can talk about it forever. Why? And you're probably right. Whatever you come up with is right. There are so many causes of suffering, but there's the suffering that we cause each other that's the biggest problem.

[41:01]

So there are some people who enjoy life, and there are some people who don't. There are people who do not enjoy life, for whom life is not an enjoyable experience. And there are people for whom life is an enjoyable experience. And the people for whom life is not an enjoyable experience make it very difficult for the people for whom life is an enjoyable experience. And they don't care, because they don't have the empathy. Since life is not enjoyable, there's no empathy for what they do to others. So, because they're miserable, they make everybody else miserable. And it doesn't matter. And so, power becomes the enjoyable part of their life, because there's no enlightenment to make them joyful.

[42:07]

Enlightenment is totally hindered. Enlightenment would make them joyful, but since they can't bring that forth, it's hindered through, for one reason or another, they make life miserable for everyone around them. So that's why it's important to practice. Practice is probably the most important thing to bring enlightenment into the world so that people can actually experience it for themselves, so that they won't make life miserable for others and themselves. Suffering always goes on. How do you escape from suffering? You escape from suffering by having a big capacity for it. And we have to accept suffering as part of our life.

[43:15]

We say, until everyone is no longer suffering. When people are no longer suffering, then we don't have to suffer anymore. But that will never happen, because the nature of this world is the nature of suffering. That's just what it is. Because it's a dualistic world. And when you have a dualistic world, you have suffering. But when you totally suffer, when you totally accept your suffering, then it's no longer suffering. Because there's nothing outside of that. There's nothing to compare it with. Because we're comparing our pain to pleasure, They're suffering. That's very simple. Very simple. Because we compare and evaluate, we have suffering.

[44:29]

It's very interesting in small children and babies, When they have the suffering, they cry and so forth, but they accept everything right away because they don't have anything to compare it with. And so they just accept their situation. And they're okay with it until they get a few days older, you know, and then they start comparing. But there's a certain point at which they're just accepting things as they are. They don't know any better or any worse. Anyway, that's our lot, and the less of a dualistic mind we have, the less discriminating we are, the less we suffer. That's the message of Buddhism. Amy?

[45:37]

Can you talk a little about the difference between accepting our suffering and not accepting things that we should not accept? We don't have time. But I would say, today, just accept everything, swallow everything, before it bites you.

[46:15]

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