Good morning. I'm speaking this weekend about zazen, this practice of just sitting, of dropping body and mind. So I mentioned yesterday this story about shito shichan, sekito kisen in Japanese, who wrote the Harmony of Difference and Sameness in the Song of the Grass Hut, and he was asked, what is the essential meaning of the Buddhadharma? And he said, not attaining, not knowing. When asked if there was anything beyond that, he said, the wide sky is not obstructed by the drifting clouds. In fact, of course, as I said, the drifting clouds are part of the wide sky.

[01:01]

And discussing that, I said that the spacious, wide Buddha nature on your seat right now is not obstructed by the thoughts drifting by either. So I wanted to start this morning by talking about thinking. This is a subtle and persistent question. And sometimes, in very subtle ways, people come to me and say, oh, I'm trying to get rid of these thoughts. I'm thinking too much. There's all these thoughts. And I mention, often, Uchiyama Roshi saying, that, as you said, of course, your stomach continues to secrete digestive juices, and in the same way, your brain continues to secrete thoughts. So, as you just said, no attaining at all, and of course, getting rid of thoughts is not what our practice is about.

[02:16]

But there's a story about this that I wanted to talk about. One of our ancestors in China, Yaoshan, in Japanese, Yaksan, was sitting still, steadfastly, and a student came up to him and said, what are you thinking about while you are sitting like that? And various ways to translate it, but basically Yaoshan said, I'm thinking about not thinking. or depending on how you read the Chinese particles, I'm thinking of that which does not think. Notice, please, that he did not say, I'm not thinking. He said, I'm thinking of that which doesn't think. What does that mean? How do you do that? And this was a very good student who said, and he said, oh, how do you think of not thinking?

[03:20]

And Yaoshan said, well, he actually used a different Chinese negative particle, but it's often translated as non-thinking. But I like Shouhaku's translation. He said, beyond thinking. So I'm going to talk a little bit about beyond thinking. As the quality of our mind as we sit here uprightly, allowing this body and mind to be this body and mind just as it is, returning our attention to this body and mind. The pain in our back or our knees, the discomfort in our shoulders, the troublesome thoughts, the laundry lists or tapes rolling around in our thinking and so forth. What does this mean, this beyond thinking? So as I ask that question, maybe you start thinking about it.

[04:32]

So I would say that beyond thinking is not not thinking. It's not the absence of thought. And beyond thinking is also not thinking. It's not thinking about something. Just beyond thinking. And maybe asking these questions gets caught up in too much mental entanglements. And please feel free to forget everything I say this morning. Maybe the sooner the better. But I'm still talking, so I don't even know what it is that you're going to have to forget. Beyond thinking. Again, it's not thinking about something. It's not our usual, we're all very good at figuring out and calculating and deliberating and problem-solving and thinking through things and all of that. It's not that you should get rid of that.

[05:41]

Getting rid of that is not the point of zazen. It's not the point of Buddhist practice at all. And yet, as we sit here for a day or two or three or a period, there may be spaces between the thoughts. wonderful and pleasant, and we can just feel what it feels like to be here. We can feel the cool or the warmth. We can feel the sounds. We can feel our breathing. We can feel the sensations of this body. And, you know, you don't have to think about it. Beyond thinking, I'm tempted to say it's a kind of thinking. I confess, I'm tempted to lean slightly that way. Certainly, beyond thinking is a kind of awareness.

[06:46]

So this is a very important part of what our Zazen is, of what awakening is, of how we actually help relieve suffering in the world, and of course in this body and mind. Beyond thinking. How, how, how, how, how do you think of that which doesn't think? Beyond thinking. The water is cold. I know that before I say it or label it, before I think about it. And it's refreshing to my throat, which is a little dry. Beyond thinking, anyway, even if it's not a kind of thinking, it's a kind of awareness. So, whatever's happening in your zazen, whether your mind is fluttering around, whether there's some pain in your shoulders or knees or wherever, whether you feel sleepy and groggy, whether you're feeling sad about something, whether you're feeling fearful about, you know,

[08:01]

the next pain that's going to come, or what you're going to have to do tomorrow, or whatever. Whatever's going on in this body and mind as you sit there, part of beyond thinking is just to be aware of it, to bring your awareness to it. Not to figure it out or categorize it, but just, oh, what is this? So it's a kind of awareness, but it's not the same kind of awareness as thinking. That's a kind of awareness. We can think about things. You can think about your knee, or you can think about the laundry list that went through your head two periods ago or whatever. But beyond thinking is this quality of awareness that's deeper than that. So I do not imagine that I'm saying anything that you don't already know.

[09:07]

All of you have said Zazen quite a lot. So I'm just trying to say something about what that is that you do, that you are, as you said, Zazen, and encourage you to keep going, to keep sitting, to keep beyond thinking. So beyond thinking is a kind of awareness that is somatic, that is physical. This is a thing we do physically. It's a yogic, physical, in some sense maybe even athletic activity. To sit upright, to be present in whatever posture is your most upright, most dignified posture right now. It may include raising your knee. It may include all kinds of varied varieties.

[10:13]

We can do zazen sitting cross-legged, kneeling, sitting in a chair, standing, even lying down. There are ways to do zazen. Of course, walking, as you know. This is something we actually physically do with this particular body that's on your cushion right now. Beyond thinking. It has a kind of thinking. Think of beyond as an adjective. It's beyond thinking. It's the thinking that is, maybe it's underlying thinking. It's not understanding thinking, as we say that to stand under something is to have some conceptualization of it, some understanding. But anyway, the thinking going on a foot or six feet below your cushion right now, the thinking going on, you know, on the next cushion,

[11:24]

How is your thinking happening on the next cushion? How is your thinking connected with the thinking of the person sitting next to you? We think we are what we think. Sometimes people say we are what we eat, that too. But we have this idea that we are what we think. And if there's thinking going on, that that's us. This beyond thinking is not obstructed by the white clouds drifting. So this going beyond, Dogen talks about going beyond Buddha, means that when you actually feel and experience, get a glimpse or a taste of beyond thinking, you don't have to think about it, you don't have to hold on to it, please go beyond that. So it's also going beyond thinking. It's the thinking that continues and doesn't get caught in the thinking before, or in the beyond thinking just before.

[12:37]

Beyond thinking is fresh and new and raw in each moment. Beyond thinking isn't just happening in your head. It could be happening there. It could be happening in your throat, in your mudra, the small of your back and your elbows. So I mention this line from Dogen often, just fully experience the vital process on the path of going beyond Buddha. experienced the vital process on the path of going beyond Buddha. Whatever Buddha you have understood or seen or even deeply experienced, that's great. Please continue meeting the next moment in its rawness. Beyond thinking is not caught by your thinking or by your not thinking.

[13:44]

happen, like we allow the sounds of the footsteps overhead, or whatever sensation is happening. How is thinking? How do you think of not thinking? How is not thinking? How is it beyond thinking? Inhale, exhale. And bring our awareness to this and to this and to this. So without thinking about thinking, there is a way to be beyond thinking, to bring our awareness and attention to this body and mind, this quality of awareness.

[15:00]

Even if you feel sleepy, it's okay. That's what's happening. Can we pay attention to that? Can we feel in our shoulders or neck the dream thoughts going through our head as we're somewhere between what we think of as awake and asleep, if that's what's happening. Or if your mind keeps going back to some problem you're trying to deal with in your life. Okay, you don't have to think about it, but you don't have to get rid of it either. Sit with it, be with it. Beyond thinking, you may come to it. Again, not to attain or know something about it, but just to be with it, to feel how it is, to be present and upright in this body and mind, beyond thinking, but aware. So, thinking or beyond thinking or whatever with this, I was reminded of a poem that some of you have heard me talk about, but it's one,

[16:13]

I'm tempted to say a technique. We've been talking about Zazen as beyond techniques, but if there's some technique that helps, fine. Whatever helps you to settle. So if you want to chant mantras or count your breaths or whatever, you can do that for a while. Don't get stuck on that. Anything that helps you to settle into this space, which is not obstructed by the white clouds drifting, that's fine. So this is a poem by Wang Wei. And there's really just two lines I want to talk about, but I'll mention the whole thing. And again, I've talked about it before. Some of you have heard me talk about it. Wang Wei was a, I think, ninth century great Chinese poet. And he said, in my middle years, I've grown fond of the way the down. I head out from my hut on South Mountains to look for sights that only I can see.

[17:18]

I follow the stream back to the source and sit and wait for the time when clouds arise. Perhaps I meet a person of the woods. We talk and laugh and I forget to go. So that's the whole poem, but there's two lines in here I want to offer as a kind of practice instruction, something to do if you want something to do while you're just sitting. Follow the stream back to the source. I actually tried to do this at one of the small creeks that feeds the Tassajara Creek one time. I felt like I was getting close to the source. But as you sit and the stream of thoughts comes up, what is it like to follow the stream back to the source?

[18:24]

So in trying to do this as a practice, my own experience is that I could get into thinking about, oh, where did that thought come from, and seeing where it started, as if I could figure my way back to the source. But it's much more tactile than that. It's like wading in the stream. Follow the stream back to the source. Be present in the stream of thoughts, if there are thoughts there. Often, in a period of zazen, a thought or two will occur. Just follow the stream back to the source. Sit with it. Be with it. It's like walking meditation. Walk upstream. Feel the stream of thoughts. And actually, at any point along the stream, you can stop and sit and wait for the time when clouds arise. But see if you can get back to the place where you actually are there as you see a thought arise.

[19:28]

Another thought. It's possible to do that. Don't worry if you can't do it either. It's fine. It's not some attainment. But sit and watch what's happening. And beyond thinking, follow the stream of thoughts back to the source. And sit and wait for the time there's a particular time when a cloud arises. See a thought emerge. Beyond thinking, be present with the process of thinking and not thinking without trying to attain anything or figure out anything or accomplish anything or even know how it works. Just hang out there. So I just offer that as a One way of studying this beyond thinking.

[20:34]

And then just come back to this posture. This inhale. This exhale. The quality of your mudra. the sensation of your chest or throat, and so on. Bring your awareness to the whole process of whatever it is that's sitting on your cushion right now. What is this? And in the middle of that, if you want to follow the stream back to the source, if you're bored and you want something to do, sit and wait for the time So I have a few more little offerings about this from our great Buddha ancestors.

[21:45]

Just kind of suggestions or kind of food for how to beyond think. So in the Song of the Grass Hut, which we'll chant a little later, Chateau, who also talked about not attaining, not knowing, said, well, first he said, meet the ancestral teachers, be familiar with their instructions, so I'm sharing some of that. Bind grasses to build a hut and don't give up. So please, continue. Please take another inhale and another exhale. extremely important that you continue to breathe throughout the day. Please do. If you actually pay attention to your breathing, you might notice that each inhale and each exhale is totally unique in the details of the configuration of your

[22:59]

Buddha Mudra posture right now, in the configuration of the thoughts or non-thoughts going through your head, even chemically in terms of the quality of oxygen and so forth in the world and in this room, each breath is in some subtle way unique, each inhale and each exhale, and yet every inhale and exhale you've ever taken is absolutely required for you to take the next one. So please continue that. Don't give up, in other words. So when he talks about a grasshut, he talks about your sabotage, your space, and of course our little grasshut here on Irving Park Road. How do we take care of this situation, this space of beyond thinking, this space of just being present and dropping body and mind, and bringing our awareness to body and mind? So it's interesting. He says, don't give up.

[24:01]

And then he says, let go of hundreds of years and relax completely. Open your hands and walk, in a sense. So let go of hundreds of years and relax completely. I know it doesn't feel like that often in the middle of a day of sitting when you're feeling the tension in your back or your knees or your lower back or your shoulders or wherever. But the point of this practice really is to just relax completely. Let go of hundreds of years. But because of the entanglements of many lifetimes, we do have routines and ruts in our thinking. We do have habits. these tangled places in our body where our patterns of thinking have been caught and lodged. So relaxing completely is, well I don't want to make it into entertainment, but anyway, it's a challenging instruction.

[25:12]

But he says, let go, let go of hundreds of years, just let go. Don't give up, but let go. Or don't give up, let it go. And take another breath. So as we are all sitting here, you know, it's, it's actually kind of visible, the tension in our bodies. We all have that, to some extent, in some ways. And occasionally, you know, I'll see someone who looks really relaxed. The next period, there may be, you know, there's maybe tension in their shoulders again, or whatever. But this, you know, we get a taste of this complete relaxation somewhere during the course of a period or a day.

[26:20]

Or we can. It's available. And then maybe some other thought or feeling or something comes up and we get tangled up again. So use your breath to massage those tangles. It's not going to necessarily untangle them, but allow your breath to Be present in its inhale and its exhale. Where do you feel tension? This is, again, a yogic practice. This is not predominantly some intellectual practice. This is something we do physically, something we do with our body. Of course, our thinking and our minds are not separate from our body.

[27:22]

In English and Western discourse, it's pretty hard not to kind of talk about them as if they are. Really, it's just body-mind. So breathe into your thinking. Exhale from your thinking. Breathe into your non-thinking or your beyond-thinking. just fully experience the vital process on the path of going beyond Buddha. So, you know, what we do, you know, if somebody just walked in and saw all these people sitting, unmoving, upright, facing the wall, any of you remember the first time you saw that? It's kind of weird. It looks kind of strict or rigid or whatever.

[28:35]

And yet, this is a practice about relaxing completely, about letting this body and mind be this body and mind, not trying to attain some higher state of mind or higher state of being, not trying to figure out the answers to whatever. Unlocking your attention. And it may arise again in the next moment. But again, you can follow the stream back to the source. Sit and wait and watch. So please, you know, we lose our balance all the time. Come back to this upright breathing. Feel how it feels. So I'll close with a couple little selections about this from Dogen.

[29:44]

These are both from later on in his life. ceremony that happened in the Chinese and in Dogen's monastic setup, there was a kind of a lax period during the summer where they sat lasozen. And then on the ninth day of the ninth month, no, I guess it was the first day of the ninth month. Well, ninth month for us is September. This would probably have been a month later. There's a kind of renewal of zazen, the traditional way. Anyway, Dogen says, never lower your head in sleep. So please don't sleep while you're sitting in zazen.

[30:49]

But if you're sleeping, please do zazen while you're sleeping. So he says, never lower your head in sleep. So continue to bring your awareness to this practice. And he says, thinking of oneness is seeing the coming of wisdom, or thinking of sameness. Stop discussions based on grasping at trees and relying on grasses. Do not seek externally for the lotus that blooms in the last month of the year. So don't seek for anything. This is a particular reference to some wonderful mythological lotus. Body and mind that is dropped off is steadfast and immovable. Although the sitting cushions are old, they show new impressions. At this very time, how is it? So, the Zafi you've been sitting on all day today, and some of you yesterday, maybe it's old, but each time you get up from sitting on it, it's got a new impression.

[31:57]

we impress ourselves on our shrinkers. And each period of zazen, we might feel like this is old, you know, you've all done lots and lots of zazen. But each period of zazen, like each breath, is unique. If you actually had a, I don't know, we don't have, even with, you know, 3D avatar, we don't have a good enough recording of all of the things that go on in one period of Zaza. Can you imagine like a total, some kind of a technological recording of everything that happens in your body and mind through 40 minutes or 30 minutes or whatever? I don't know what that would be like. Some of you are technologically advanced and can maybe speculate about it, but if we did that, No two of them would be exactly alike. It's impossible. It wouldn't be the same breaths.

[33:00]

Even if you're thinking about the same things, it wouldn't be the same exact quality of thought. Although the sitting cushions are old, although this practice of zazen may feel like you know what it is, You all came in here and just sat down, and it's lovely. Still, there are new impressions. At this very time, how is it? How does it feel? What is it like to be present in this new zazen that you just sat last period, or in this period of listening to my dharma babbling up here. Each of you listening to the dharma talk token says this elsewhere, and I would say it too, that Buddhas talk about the dharma and Buddhas listen to the dharma.

[34:02]

So, on each cushion in the room, maybe even on the cushions that aren't obviously occupied, there is Buddha listening to the dharma. And yet, even if you've heard me talk about some of these sayings or stories before, And for me talking about them, each situation is new. We have routines in our head. We have patterns of thinking. But actually, even if you're thinking in some traditional conditioned way, each experience is fresh and new. So this beyond thinking has something to do with the rawness of the new impressions on your sitting cushions right now. Can we be willing to be that present, that raw, that tender, not knowing who we are, just like Bodhidharma?

[35:12]

Of course, we all know lots of stuff. I can recite the dates of old Zen masters, what a useless bit of knowledge. Whatever you know, can you be willing to meet this new cloud arising, this new experience, in this body and mind? Can we be that intimate with our experience? Can we keep questioning, oh, what is this? Not assuming we know anything. It's pretty hard to do that. We know so much that we have such a, our world is, we have so many things that we know about who we are and how the world is and so forth and so on. Can you meet the rawness of this inhale?

[36:17]

This exhale? All of this is what Yarshan calls beyond thinking, I would suggest. So I read this one yesterday. I'll read it again. What is called zazen is to sit, cutting through the smoke and clouds without seeking merit. become unified, never reaching the end. In dropping off body and mind, what are the body and the limbs? How can it be penetrated from within, the bones and marrow? Already such, how can we penetrate it? In the end, the grasses shoot up and bring forth the wind of the Buddha way. But particularly what strikes me this week is this sentence, just become unified, never reaching the end.

[37:23]

How do we find our own wholeness? How do we find our own unity in this period of zazen, in this inhale, in this exhale? How do we see how we are deeply connected as wonderful as your zazen or beyond thinking may be in the next period of zazen. It's not separate from that of everybody else in the room. We all do this together. We all live our lives together, and each one of us uniquely in our own way. How do we become unified? Never reaching the end, never attaining or knowing anything, just enjoying the next breath. So we're going to have a Dharma discussion this afternoon, but somehow I feel like asking if anyone has any comment or response right now.

[38:43]

Wendy. Yeah, I was thinking about the storm this week, and it seems like representations of the storm in words, like our little visual images of the storm moving, and then there's I mean the wind and the wet and the sky and that's, you know, I think beyond thinking is going outside and experiencing the storm. So maybe each thunderclap is also unique, like each breath. Serena? Without trying to think what you're going to say, I just brought up a lot of thoughts. And sometimes I feel like Zazen is sort of like, it's kind of like, for me, like an act of compassion for this body.

[40:00]

Good. mental thoughts and creation and to just have a physical experience within my body just as a being without commodifying or whatever my brain does. that it's kind of a physical practice because sometimes it really feels that that is the only way of kind of breaking through the thoughts. It's just kind of having physical experience in, like for me, like getting intimate with like the feeling of sometimes I feel so much fatigue in my brain, like just the sensation

[41:01]

and actually having some awareness and feeling it, as opposed to thinking about it and just feeling the texture of it. And sometimes, like when you were talking about following the stream, where it comes from, sometimes I think it's, sometimes I think thoughts originate from, like, almost from, like, they come inside my ear. And sometimes I feel like if I pay attention... Maybe you're hearing Jenny's thoughts. To the sensation in my ears, just the light there, doorways, and to pay attention to the very sensation at the very openings of my inner ears, it seems like thoughts don't come in if I pay attention to it. Feeling that it's so... When I'm able to set things aside, put all the quick thoughts aside and have a physical experience, it's actually really helpful and it's a really refreshing break from thoughts.

[42:21]

Good. Thank you very much for that testimony. So yeah, today we have a vacation. a break from our usual body and mind. So it's not just dropping body and mind. Being present in your body is also letting go of not just the clamor of thoughts, but also the physical sensations that come in your ear, too. So, please enjoy this day, this break from our usual being in the world. And of course, it's not separate from our usual being in the world. But this is an opportunity to just drop body and mind, to go beyond thinking, to be present in this body and mind.

[43:18]

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