well good morning once again and that i taught for the bed and then and against some questions or comments such a them from going to that little bit and then
the rest of my room and will take a little break and was said and walk and sentinel have lunch
so little visiting

at first but i want to stay a little bit about how i am you know all this is it's kind of just language in and sentence language in his early years useful for him
you're having some feeling for experience or reality or how to be with things are understand things etc

and
and meditation of course is a bit different than happy to live and in some ways i think about it is fairly simple and
you know am
and i think must be now i'm in i've been in and in this movie with and it's made by one named story
chairman kim j can she's been making movies for years
garrison in her way as you know
ah each of us is in our own way and in a quite an unusual person
at the berlin film festival and
when the movie first came out and then there's something magical about this movie because from the time when i talk about it to the berlin film festival was less than a year and have
i mean check on her dad you know you can think of the movie inhabit a film festival year and half later
that's that's a lot of people
i'm in a bind in the production company german film board with varying soundboard people getting employed mine said happened in then there is getting her crew together and filming and editing and the jazz group and you know it we're gonna happen and said the film business
so we rented film festival in and we did a lot of interviews and sometimes there isn't i did interviews together
and sometimes and the interviewer and there's a day kind enough to speak in english
after my benefit even the and then sometimes the end-of-year chris in her in german and in english you know so when know what's his name but one of engineers as terrorists and so when did you get interested in and meditation
and guy says oh thirteen twenty years ago
and i'm saying and i said there is no be just gets interested in meditation what went wrong what happened

as if your life is going okay ah there you know i bother
and i said well my husband was diagnosed with terminal cancer and given an
and i forget to know six ninety six weeks to lead

and they had and their daughters now and
nineteen or twenty carla
and at the time you know the data was a year and a half two years old
and i said the team just beside herself
and had no idea what to do is terrified and upset and scared
sad
and somebody and sent her little book about meditation and basically it said sit down sit still shut up
and she tried it and it out

as i'm going to help to take long walks
i'm from the weeds do the dishes
as so she got interested in annotation
and her husband lived a bit longer than he is diagnosed and to their bedpan
guide a company insulator

and so and
normally when using energy in our energy and goes pretty automatically into movement and in this page
and so and
and an intj gets drawn to things they are attracted to things are we want to satisfy some racer desire one in know so removing towards things are moving away from things
we're reaching out for things with person things away and were talking about what's going on with me
what i want what i don't want ram going what i'm not where i'm not going when i'm doing what i'm not doing on getting i'm not feeling so
and this is all pretty
you know it's pretty routine eyes their habitual is a bit your age and against into various activities and base patented speech
angelenos as i mentioned last night service
no enjoy talking and other people enjoy you know i'm one this nino service this worry about what to say and and then said has no no don't send him much concern
from my pioneer in asia
why are they going on that ship
and
so anyway our energy we have energy in your habits your patents and
and then when you sit down and sit still and quiet and what happens to energy
you know it's not going in its usual way it's not you know rising and then going here and they're pulling back or layer and it's not talk enter
so our energy patterns and then hang on the organized to accomplish what we want to have accomplished you know i unable to do that
and so then the energies in your body and
and there's a chance than nature energy and become can become you know and so to speak spiritual energy
i a designation in a spiritual energy
ah and begin to moving your body in ways that it's and not used to moving and it will find ways to moving your body
and there are no such as big energy channels and inviting
and this energy as it's develop a man in your body will start to and
in a move to go to move through the energy channels and and when things that happens is it will come to places it can't go and then can consider

and non-weight when the energy can't go to someplace that goes into activity or speech if we should should should not a problem
but now there's the possibility and it in it
be pushing that something that seems to be in the way and this is in and pain
felodipine you having is sitting is the fact that the energies you know we're going to move failure and it can't go to their
is there something blocking its way
now there's also in no i don't wanna say and i don't want you to think at all paying is this kind of pain because senate thing we just move in skirt and a it fit differently done and bother the that pain but there's any pain or a know
an involuntary movements
and then is this kind of an event where they you know what we heard earlier about you know your legs hurt in the nascent tears and then your legs don't head well that's because that was blocking the energy there is some old emotion that you know hasn't come to the surface and once that all the most
singing are holding on to what happened in the past once and services and she go stay there and doesn't anymore
said this energy which is not going into activity and pebbles realizations and as is doing a kind of work and your body and your been to i moved here you and declare energy pathways

and again you know this isn't all of our the pain that is a good tailor in the pain that we have is
a materials memories thoughts habits of mind and judgments as directives are fixed thinking that i used they've been the most part is associated with emotions

and
you know classically or work in a most of the world is doing and what we've done most of our lives is to see if i construct your life where i don't have to ever encounter that the issues that are stuck inside of me
i had to stay baking and i said things up so i don't ever have to have that sadness or that and we both had are in losses and in a difficult issue whether it's at a young age or older because there's an you know this loss and
and there's abandonment and there's betrayals
and there's rooms and of his sadness and grief and sorrow and anger and resentment and frustration
and some are in know people and i've been to really in a pretty horrible horrendous life experiences

can we know candidate
if you're and in a familiar with the works at alice known as she writes book after book about this how childhood trauma inconsiderate life and now they know grape alex and you know brilliant artists you know when it's thursday at care nici or
schiller rambo i had an ancient airways difficult childhoods they're very brilliant but they never get around to acknowledging that that the pain the pain in their life and by the she this and protecting the innocence of the pants
you know why i say it was therefore because you loved them
selena know fictional a brilliant artists can write about kids going through the difficult is that they had his children it's not something that they ever wanna say actually happened to them
and it's not something to acknowledge and and again to to actually they will let go of something you have to acknowledge it because the surface and semi and then you can acknowledge it the new consciousness sickening answered and and to ensure knowledge it is a point where you can record

so as you could tell this morning you know guys were doing each vs involved in our world in semi and things are coming out for as and but known as you continue to meditate certainly it would not be at on surprising ah to have this kind of jail come to the surface
as the energy states to
ah moving your body
and people who study these things have in a different issues in different parts of the body
ah and you may or may not agree with their body mapping you might find and can go get your body mapping is somewhat different
and add your issues and semitic places that
i were decent people who are in a quite extraordinary an intensive and what they can teach and sense and somebody's body in so for instance for in for them
ah in the knees had to do it abandonment issues
right news you know more about meant abandoning guy you know you've been having been abandoned by mail or abandoning male rodney's more about abandoning female or haven't been abandoned by game now and then you have pain and heads and you had a knee injuries
ah there
because it's week and told him and it's not advantage is not moving in there and it tends to be injured contain and she's not just moving can you don't have stabbed by talent in that area and you tend to get injured in some place where you're holding onto old material
shoulders are that trust you know can you let the world in are you wanna hide them the world i asked you know you're scared about the world and it long relationship to the ground or in okay you
in japan and out a willing to connect with the real deal trust
what's happening here how do you show this help themselves
or as i was mentioned as nine am know if
if you want to protect others from my who you are because you see yourself so angry and adequate or gel listen
and since i'm not good enough and then you can take your shoulders so that others can know what's going on with you

and there's no terror lines and the body and there's a betrayal lines and there's disappointment shame humiliation mean others
a shame grimes read it they go
so and in fitting you know it's and if you said over and over numbered years in the energy row
start to vibrate in areas where it hasn't vibrated before
and you can feel something you haven't never expect your whole life not wanting to fail
get nasty have the chance
and at some point in our you feel then in atheists are relieved am
to finally have i know the grave or sour
the shame that you've been put up your life you know they've been postponing you know free in our all your lap and you can find the allowed to as and record it and then not spending the rest of your life defending yourself from every experience in that and attacking at for you know making you feel that way
separating them
angela changes in then you can more here in are you a more connection with yourself and others
and because you don't have to disconnecting only to hide what's happening with you or the hide from when others may think of here you can actually be in connection

so this is partly live in on sand as anything in a particular articulate about this kind of things and what i'm suggesting to or same here is just it's again it's it's a tentative kind of language in to talk about something that princeton and
xander my like same
am
sitting is beyond human agency it's beyond your figuring out and making it happen or not happen in a meditation is beyond you're doing it's not something that you're doing you're not doing sit down sit still set up let it happen
yeah not in charge it will take care of itself you will get under and you'll be exposed you know things will come up and say pc that going and you'll get on with your life and you know things the ship for you and and in owning a suggestion is
why don't you know just guy interest to happened with that you know your great scary your skill or lack of skill is never to do with it you know it's something you put some time and on vacation and things will unfold
ah and on the other hand you know where said me using in a wiccan and you can sit down and you know whether it's and as dramatic as guys and her a has been been diagnosed with terminal cancer and

having a young daughter or it's and
you know if you're stressed about your work or you know
a life and finances or relationships or whatever you know meditation just a simple way can be a way to come back to yourself and have some quiet time when he said
and and a chance to check in and see what's coming up
and to kind of have a little distance and not be a distance in the sense of not be right away and bargain your action reaction acting acting speaking verbalizing solving fixing changing you know take
but sit down required for wow sit with the difficulty and something comes to you know in or what to do and to ready go from here

and that way to go from here and often doesn't come and most at a time you know where to go from there doesn't come in
our language that's readily understandable
i'm making center know
it's not like you can said and then of voices
quit that job
i stay with that work is something you know but what to do can stay in a way that than you actually had to like unpack or find your way into what was that it came to you
i mean once know of things happened my bed i i love the stereotypes and steady ten a cranial sacral with the men and him down he added if you've done if you do body work in on you are interested in this kind of thing it's fascinating him known as the in a millions to m i l ne
the and his own judge live in big sur
and as he does at courses and cleanness april one two three and instead can stay like thursday friday saturday sunday and they are and some of the most amazing things they've done and he's going in asia because he is teaching both technique and
intuition and most people who teach that kind of work are either teaching techniques or intuition kidnappers here's how you do it
apply the protocols go to the protocol the procedure
and other people think we're just feel it
right

that he tells us as i just let history he said how he first started dating his work he has brought his parents had he was a scottish whose parents had a clinic i have of health health clinic in scotland and then sometimes people come down and stay there for waited two weeks and had a kind of clans and
a police massages and spies and whenever
so when he was about sixteen or seventeen his mother taught him how to do than the size that they would give to people there
so is one of the first days the team is doing this zazi you know he'd done five and six or seven massages and
and his just exhausted you know forty five minute or minute besides you know
can't stop for lunch and doing in a three or four more says to ended a day and of as person comes in turns out is clothes layouts for upside down the table and somebody had been coming there for nine years and they went to doing is said he was standing it leaning against a wall and one is ever going to do
and he couldn't imagine doing that massage and a voice he heard his voice that said touch his feet
and he went have and put his hand on the man's paid
you know for five or eight or ten minutes
then the boy said put your hand on his seagram
so he gave this person cranial sacral you know
directed craniosacral
it came to him
an added yeah that's when you can live in air and
ah you know not all of them are

b m
anyway and after the massage and
you know he was a little worried and knowing that the man gets up this is what will you doing
and he says or that's just the massage we give people here
and the man says i've been coming here for thirty years and that's not what you just do to people
but it was the most amazing experience they've ever had here
and at that point you can you know tell somebody you know what you were doing they say what you weren't doing anything you are you are meditating you just tend your hands down you saving receiving another prison
is saving another person frank meditations in know you're not doing something to them and not say like i'm going to help me release this tension you've got here you know
i think you've got some myofascial you know
tightness that
but take care that for you may not doing anything he just receiving and this is is dissenting it's so hard to explain to anybody who is in not in this world know and of know this kind of possibility

so this is not and so the cigarettes and you know as the energy works inside of you and encounters the place it's going to the energy in your body and and of it's not going into its usual activity and usual speech is going to be
be moving in the channels are attempting to move in the channels and attempting to get the blockages out of the way
so one of my metaphors for this you know is am and know as things come up like this and in now you might feel for instance egg you have anger coming up on sadness and
no all kinds of things and give be a leg
if i let this happen and just i can be i can be angry grammar but actually what happens is the energy there's just the angering a blockage there
and it's like it's a training on the pipes that if arrested and in a in the pipes and to break comes out and then after while the energy runs clear the water runs clear this is greg what happens to your in you're sitting experience
and what it's like to can only you're turning on the faucet and you know when you said then in our library experiences the rest and debate it's coming out and you don't notice them much that neither what is running clear after that happens because by then the energy has gone on to another blockage
huh

but anyway life is unfolding and yet you're finding your way
and
and way down you know expand mysterious how we find her way or went to do
because you know there's no way to keep thinking that would be some way and
you know to
if i was
if i was savvy are skillful i could and in avoid this is that this kind of disasters in the experienced this kind of
and blessings and you know but you know everything is there an
and it's not day and know it's not the point of i like to avoid
some things and experience others
the next day and know whether the things that buddhism is emphasizing in your kitchen is that this is no that's the first number cheers that's the first thing to know is that
you never going to be able to control things that were just experience what you want to avoid the things you don't want to so and in order to have any moment of experience everything is there in every moment
said he wanted be save i you know the beauty than you received the in the with administering the pain
you really have a touch you know he always made in both sides
and to meet one thing he had to be here to meet everything rather see yourself
to meet your search you can have made someone who is when you forget how to prison in is a king
this is true and the other people in your lives and you know your friends your family your children your pants
and yeah
thread is right
and some people will decide to you know hang in there with them and i've opened that you know if i wasn't may i would not spend much time at this person
but it's not like anybody else is willing to do this
damn i guess it's gonna be a to need to hang out with me
and
be a person tears in a no man trust me and believing hands
i mean i have to be that person has say much
anyway
but and york times in my life it's taken a lot of convincing
and i have and then head fancy know help convince me then
read the a benefit kind of intimacy up to adults permitted did a kind of work
ah okay and attacked and nap checks and so am
ah any comments questions here before poorly take a little break
is this kind of targets i'm sure you know and a new probably encouraging and insanity have discouraging what i can just rise above it all and
yeah
see a spiritual pain
and you know i'm writing this i'm i've just read and i started reading against the first on my lap ever read to him but understand it again right at the beginning it's got on becoming an alchemist
and so she talks about a know a lot of these things so that kind of speeches when she goes also known as the astral plane and baggage disclaim
say if you can you can have that can spiritual uk not claiming your baggage
noel are carrying baggage around sometimes in their bodies so if you disclaim the baggage the to god in your body than you can get spiritual
have such as
a said
i love that bag and to claim
and it's a little bit like there i i forget who i tell right now but you know that stephen the mine and when somebody says they have their shit together
this usually standing in it
filled he says you know they
they can infestations so for the blood and light says i i think to myself by watch out for the fall

ah right

right

we're
yeah stuck yeah
so that's a great example
her while the possibilities

so on my basic and
you know sensibility over the years has been to ah you know i'm interested in workability wentz workable what's helpful so am i am i
i'm looking for what you know how to work with things so it may be that this aspects of meditation or used to it is you know yoga qigong are things that are useful and there's like psychotherapy kind of modalities he is for and
i'm in an airstream work and and there's body based things and so
and you know to me it's an
ah and so
yeah i'm more interested in and i was making the i make this distinction in various ways bed and

i've always been more interested in and the what to thomas more never did
soulmates so maids and canada so he didn't agree books that then
because he says in his book of that soul mates she says am very some really good books out there uncommitted developing a communication skills and how to make your relationship work said that's what you're interesting get one of those my book isn't one of those my main
interest is helping you expand your poetic imagination
ah and am so you know but it's not to say that actually similar to other things wouldn't be helpful for something like anxiety and may be some actually fairly useless simple tools know their help
and i don't know that i can give you any of those today is
so
and and party what i'm talking about today is if you have the idea when you have when we have the idea that must be there you know i'm i'm feeling anxious and then you start to think what does this mean about me
oh
and then if you're anxious to see you can only think thinks it will agree with the anxiousness
ah then you can stay to be anxious that there's something wrong with me
and then you could be anxious that if they sent him wrong with me i may not be able to do anything about it
and so on and you can keep thinking things that confirm and give you a good reason to be anxious
i'm in part of the sensibility and and meditation is and that you could just notice it
and then not go into the rest of that that go what it means about you read it means about who you are ah what it means about year you know past days and you know that because we get in our thinking you know we think they am i
could actually get rid of this
so there's a difference between and when things were studying and shifting to the mode of meditation is rather than how to get rid of something it's like how to com posted
how to recycle it for added transmuted
and take the energy to otherwise going into anxiety and do something else with it
so in that kind admitted for expanding your poetic imagination with there's many many kinds of possibilities and your kind of dreaming up he allowing some gaming and take place in the sense of dreaming up what to do or how to be with something
in a way that it can shift
and you're changing rather than i'm gonna stay the same and
and then i mean do something about anxiety riches not me
it's true it's not in his hands but so let me and
and you know give you
a different kind of example about this as an example that instead
am
no anyway this is it so i to talk about these things that prodigious takes the web and i may try to give you a very simple example and then you can save you can play to anxiety but let's say you're sitting and you're meditating and you start to think wouldn't it be great to be outside
and the fresh air would be so good and then funnier there and you know there's birds and what am i doing in stupid room and you know i need you know i don't understand this you know instead of something in you get a new sunday
it had pictures of the reality that you could be in which is not here
so what's going on
so everything can point in meditation is too
so do those desires and get rid of them that would they want approach and there's probably people who can help you do that
and that's a traditional buddhism helps you do like if you censor desires oh come on stay saying the body as a corpse
huh
a and or you could possibly have the idea dad and i weren't just gonna go outside and yeah this meditation is stupid now they said the transmutation sort of approach or that digesting it or in some way using that energy is huh
you know what if it is
it is pleasure and joy semi asked what does that say about the way i'm meditating
probate without much joy
her pleasure
why
melissa something do with how with you know where we come to about the kind of person that i should be in it is a good person to be
and you know you have to be careful about joy for and in a pleasure for various reasons guess you can get in trouble
and you can make this thing for or less liberal
an
and then am so at some point it might encourage you to say in a treated desire in this case of year you know
the awareness that's winding around presenting the trees and this guy in the birds and or whatever
and excuse me but rather than wandering out there could you help me meditate in a little different way
can you know like a please come and sit with me and show me how to meditate with a my joy and eason
and it's so yeah this is actually kind of work than to rather than always be
no stain if you can find a way to express your act and something it's like how do i bring that into my
have been said that it's already here and i don't really up to rely on depend on a be attached to say objects your activities to bring about my ears and joy which i could have just sitting here
and i could shift i could be i could be more in ah by my breath for know right
the sensations in the air or
and i could get a lighter and easier this is widening and poetic imagination
now anxiety and you know is
depends on who you are but anxiety is certainly one of the you know challenging runs but some people consider that whole area of anxiety to be a boon possibly the most challenging
but i'm sure that you can find people to the bed that because my pain is worse than yours
and but anxiety is in that realm also with fear and terror and the anxiety is kind of low grade when it comes to the and care that you could have
and you know like it and post-traumatic stress you know reenactment instead

about
well

yeah just air
ah

but they ago

re

experienced

thank you thank you thank you
subscribe to you
yeah they go to a hands

yeah i haven't noticed image and
i think i'm thinking has lot to do with this i haven't so much notice that and the bad things happen if i think about them what i've known as more than that is actually when i get really anxious about things for the most potent none of those things do happen and that's i noticed and said then and sake and then and i also noticed that my anxiety isn't
is not preventing any of these things can happen in and an anxious a bed so it's not actually doing anything so i can see where you know this is not working it's not like it helps me to be anxious about anything and you know one way or another actually inspires preventing or am
allowing it down happen

it really give yourself something be anxious about
give yourself something real to be anxious about

i'm okay well i'd like to let's take a ten minute big and then we'll come back and similar boat before we head out to lunch okay so by backlog at there it will be twelve thirty when we get back in
but my clock is ten minutes ahead of that rock and years is probably somewhere in between those two