2005.05.16-serial.00320

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but very simple very end and very profound because
how we really come alive is in doing things and this is important aspect of the sin is we come alive in doing in meeting things and in handling things and taking care of things responding to things into one another and to our own experience this is how we
come alive
we don't come alive really by consuming manufactured experiences
it's entertaining but we don't we don't come alive in the way of in the sense of being seen and recognized and appreciated
in the sense of
seeing and being seen
so do not be careful about one thing careless about another
do not give away your opportunity even to
even if it's just one drop of water and
in an ocean of marriage do not fail to place even a particle of earth at the summit of the mountain of wholesome days says very similar to mother teresa saying that
we can only do small acts but with greg grade love was great kindness
and sometimes you know i'm a i'm quite discouraged and you know about the state of the world's them
i read the for a while back and article about the oil wage
so it turns out we're using almost as many calories
of oil for every calorie of food produced
energy
and as soon as something is manufactured you know so if you have cheerios or potato chip sir
anything that's toasted roasted
know we're using eight or ten calories of energy to turn photos into tears potatoes into potato chips
so we're literally eating oil
and
this is still economically you know economic gig still you know people who are manufacturing these things and we're eating these manufactured experiences
are you know you can make a killing doing this
literally
configured too late
yeah you can make money
it still economically possible to make a lot of money by spending oil using oil to produce cheerios and and potato chips and crackers and know and to turn things into manufactured products
and
you know just in the last month or so or mother to
in the new yorker magazine there was a series of three on global warming
oh it's real
so you know what are we gonna do
and
you know maybe jovians advises rather he known as sense it's rather poignant
but there still are small acts of kindness
in a small acts we do each moment
when we do them with care and not being careless or careful and just taking care of and responding to something washing the pods cleaning the rise preparing the vegetables
serving the food during the dishes
for taking care of
in a one drop of water one particle of birds
and you know other know that it's gonna make all the difference but i don't know what else to do
so this week we're also thinking about our
i was telling my group about making the perfect biscuit
when i was cooking here in the sixties i and first i was pretty new at cooking a i i i made biscuits for the first time
from scratch
and i i didn't think the biscuits came out quite the way they should they weren't quite right so the next time i tried it a little differently and i made the biscuits with eggs and without eggs and with butter and was well as other kinds of shortening and they'd never came out right
and i did it with milk and with water and a door right
and then one day i thought turn
where am i comparing these two
what i dare do i have my mind that these biscuits don't measure up to
and i realized that when i grew up
in my family we had this great biscuits
and you took a box of quick and pour the batter into a bowl and added milk and stir to with a fork and then you could bluff it onto the pan and they came out a lot of different shapes and they were good
and then once in awhile for a special treat we had just very canned biscuits
ngo wrap the can you know on the corner of the counter twisted open and then get out your biscuits and put them out in the pan and
i that does a really good
and my biscuits weren't coming out like this greek or pillsbury
a few years ago i heard them
that does susan sarandon yosemite was and david letterman or jay leno and she said that her sister down in alabama had been to the grocery store and put the groceries in the backseat of the car was a very hot day and was driving at home and heard this loud explosion this pop and she felt something stick in the back
she said she'd been shot show and she didn't dare touch the bag of her neck
and she drove straight to the emergency room
went into the emergency room and said i think i've been shot and he said
well where and she said well i'm in the back of my neck and and they said you mean with his biscuit
this get off the bag or a neck massage turn

but i thought to can pillsbury biscuits are really good in my biscuits were coming out like pillsbury or biz quick and i thought it will do what do i really need to make these things come out like pillsbury or bis way on i
just see what they're like
this is not so this is pretty much like this is using instead of like saying use your own hands and see with your own as this is like taste with your own mouth
you know taste what you put in your mouth without some many ideas about what it should be like and see what it is like and the next time i mean misc as boy were they good
they were flaky and weedy and earthy and sunny and buttery and they kind of melted in your mouth and they were good
so and that will isn't that interesting you know i'm so much for making the perfect biscuit what about the biscuits of today and what about tasting this moment and same what it's flag
ah and tasting the moment that's in a free from the manufactured experience
the pillsbury or this quick
and we're you know this isn't just biscuits cause this is our lied to you know i don't know about you but i i pretty much you know where were all involved in in our childhood decisions masquerading as adult choices
i didn't know about you but i set out to be someone whom
you know pleased others and made everyone happy and never had any complaints didn't whine and complain and and
you know was buoyant and cheerful and happy and a do it you're told don't talk back i i add a picture of how to be in that the thing was i could never get my life to come out like that
is pretty discouraging
oh so am i gave up
and i thought maybe i can dem be me
and and have feelings and talk and i also thought you know for years at that i better be careful what i say because so that i better not say anything to sillier funding because then people might think i'm kind of a lightweight in i am
not as serious fenced-in and to be recognized as a series and student have been are not be to funnier in a joke around much so for many years i i didn't say much
and i thought i should only say things that were deep and profound and and clever so consequently i didn't say much
because it wasn't very often that i could think of anything deeper profound or clever to say
and so i had to abandon you know a lot of my best to this quick pillsbury ideas of how to me
that i had somehow come up with in the course of you know childhood japan childhood choices masquerading as adult decisions
and i started and i trained myself to
to actually talk with people and to to job sometimes into
tell stories
and i started to own in inner see
finding out the day i couldn't ever i would never be this person i set out to be and then you know a couple years ago was great i was down here to czar and i got out and ferguson's book on the chinese and is ends chinese heritage and then ears as passage in there and and the zen masters
as realizing the great mysteries nothing but breaking through it and grouse
an ordinary person's life
realizing the mystery is nothing but breaking through to grasp an ordinary person's life
this is another way of saying say in a do with your hands say with their eyes taste with your term
walk with your legs
me and your body use your body use your mind
neat things take care of things handled things take care of things
one drop of water
one particle birth
it some
it's not very special you know it's kind of just everyday
and i wish there was more to it i wish there was some way i just as soon save the world
not that it was saving
and maybe just as well
am
no i don't know what's gonna happen
and none of us can know what's going to happen or
whoa
he know for any of our lives or for the for the earth is a whole
recently i was also reading about the zen master dijon he's the one whom
studied for many years and became a great commentator on the diamond sutra
as many of you know he decided to go and straighten out the zen teachers
because he didn't think they understood so well
and on his way to the south of china to confront the zen master zhi he met a woman who was selling tea cakes and he wanted to buy a ticket have some tea cakes from her and she said water on those books your karen and he said those are my com
antares and she said so what are you
where are they commentaries on he said under their commentaries on the diamond sutra
so then she said well i have a question for you and if if you can answer it i'll give you the g cake but if you can you're not gonna eat today
pick an avid and he said okay so she is a very famous in a question and it's
past mind
he's already gone
present mind cannot be grasped future mind is not yet here what mind are you gonna eat the tea cake with
or it's a play on words because what mind in the tea cakes are also called refreshed mentor so you know what mind will you refresh
it's translated in various ways but anyway and he couldn't answer he was speechless
so then he said during citizen a naked i study with you
he said you know his zen teachers nearby
the
how he missed his chance you might see pointed him in the right direction so he began studying with the dragon marsh and when he first got to drag and marshes place he said i don't send a dragon eye on sunday march
let me
little confrontational
and the zen teacher said he me you met him
you know if this is this is dragon marsh
and anyway so he stayed there and the famous story about his enlightenment is that when night he was visiting with his teacher and it it was after dark and the teacher gave him a little paper lantern just saying in the dark and is it was about to go out the teacher blew out the ledge
and he said to have gotten enlightened
and it was sometime after that you know he got together all of his commentaries and he put them in the courtyard of the monastery and amongst gathered round and he said
ah the mysterious doctrines
our but a drop of water in a vast void
ah the affairs of people are merely a speck of dust in a boundless bottomless chasm
his books
let a match and set them all on fire

so i am i wonder about that you know all the affairs of people all the affairs in the world dirt a speck of dust and a boundless bottomless chasm
these are
and i think now there's a lot of grief in the world
an acknowledged grief grief for the world
greed for the future
great for
in other lives that we don't have because her busy consuming
and busy working hard
in old earning a living
and we miss sometimes the simple things that we can do
you know sometimes people say to me well what do you think about those bread machines
when it will bread machines are great and make grid bread you know you're not gonna get your hands needed
you know you're needing the brand you're not just needing the bread your hands are getting massaged
how are you going to get your hands mid-sized if you don't need some bread known again
when you are you gonna get you know your life awakened if you don't use your hands
if you don't use your eyes and see
if you don't you know if we're not actually working with the things of the world how are we going to be you know alive and awake and well
and i don't know what else to do in this time of which seems like a kind of modern this grave sometimes
so simple things
simple pleasures
and as seeing with your eyes feeling with your hands tasting with your tongue is another zen master who said
the monk asked him
when the great matter of birth and death is right at hand then what and he said if there's j drink tea if there's food page
i had that's pretty good
that
and the monk said who has been nourished and the teacher said pick up your ball and eat
so i think we do pretty well it that it here at does her and then center
so well you know that simply because they say you're a buddhist your food is
anyway i wanted to him
i'm thinking about all this i was reminded of upon by anna akhmatova a russian poet for you know live through a good deal of twentieth century russia
oh with them you know her friends disappearing was imprisoned at times
oh very difficult times
and this is a poem
you know about meeting
i'm meeting the world meeting someone
meeting something
something that you know you don't you haven't known before
which is each moment
hi this is the way the poem goes
a land
not mine
still forever memorable
the water of its ocean chill and fresh
sand on the bottom wider than chalk
late son lays bare the rosy lambs of the pine trees
sunset
on the ethereal waves
i can't tell if the day is ending for the world
for if the secret of secrets is inside me again

a land not mine
still forever memorable
the waters of its ocean show and fresh the sand and the bottom wider than job
late sundays bear the rosy limbs of the pine trees
sunset on the ethereal waves
i can tell
if the days ending for the world
or if the secret of secrets is inside me again
blessings thank you
so i'm moving the chairs here those views day
we endeavored to move chairs respectfully to hands carefully not shoving them across the floor picking them up putting them down with their own hands using your eyes
and this time in the evening outside we endeavored to be silent in the courtyard and around us to her so as to let people who are going to bed or they sleep and not disturb them thank you blessings