So sometimes we are trying in this, when we try to look at this practice in a way that we can integrate it in our lives, we have to find any way I have to find words for things that we don't have words for. An example for this seminar, of course, is this word, memsign. And it allows us with such a word to have a conceptual grasp of how things appear. a relationship between the present and the past.

[01:22]

And in general, it's understood in more developed Buddhist practice that you need a conception of not a conception that tells you what's going to happen, but it can help you notice. So it would traditionally be said, that you need a conception of impermanence if you are going to notice impermanence in the midst of permanence. And then since we have a habit of permanence, you have to change this habit.

[02:41]

Primarily by repetition and the idea of turning words and mantra and so forth. They're all about repetition. So very basically and simply you form an intention to notice impermanence. Now, what motivates you to form such an intention? such an intention. Well, the motivation of course partly is for some people they just want to be in a world that makes rational sense.

[03:54]

Und für einige Menschen ist die Motivation natürlich die, dass sie in einer Welt sein möchten, die für sie auf rationale Art und Weise Sinn macht. Ja, they feel better in a world that computes. Sie fühlen sich einfach besser in einer Welt, die Sinn macht, wenn man zusammenzählt, einfach Sinn ergibt. Yeah, they don't feel so good in a world of generalizations. But that's usually not sufficient. You also discover that you feel better. And if you have various insights or enlightening experiences, It's clear that enlightenment is rooted in a view of the world as impermanent.

[04:57]

Enlightenment definitely is about knowing the world as it is. And in yourself and in others you see the fruits of seeing the world as permanent as connected to suffering. So all that comes together strongly enough for you to form an intention to see the world differently than your habits and your culture have placed in you.

[06:02]

Excuse me, the last part. I have placed in you your habits and your culture. Okay, so... But... Whatever. OK. So the Eightfold Path begins with right views. The implication of that is that it's our world views, it's our views which are at the root of how we see the world. Yeah, so somehow we have to change, fiddle with an habit.

[07:10]

And once you get past the initial shock, it makes life more interesting. Okay. So you have to revise simple things like, as I said yesterday, how you understand observing mind. Yeah, if you see... always see the observing function of mind as proof of self, then you can never accept the self as impermanent.

[08:18]

Or you won't have the territory in which to explore the impermanence of the self. So if you take the observing function of the mind as non-self and sometimes self then the impermanence sense of self as an entity is undermined. And as I've suggested recently, to maybe stop using the word self altogether most of the time.

[09:18]

And as I've suggested, think in terms of selfness. Even if you think that way. And the simple word selfness gives you a chance to think that way. But you can notice when there's more selfness in your activity and when there's less. It's hard to notice when there's more self or less self. If you think of the observing mind as self, then the observing mind, it's always there, as long as you're present, alive and functioning. And if you're sure

[10:39]

And your experience verifies it. that the observing mind is the self, then you think that's present all the time. So the idea of less or more selfness doesn't have much power. Okay. So now let's... Try to think in terms of selfness. And then you can notice in the texture, topography, activity of the present, you can notice But sometimes there's more selfness and sometimes there's less.

[12:00]

And part of repetition is to take an inventory. And you start to notice when there's more selfness and when there's less. And you notice how you feel. At least I, when there's more selfness, I feel kind of not so good. I feel so sticky and lousy. When I feel less selfness, I feel kind of freer, cleaner, clearer. So being selfish, I prefer less selfness. Since I am totally self-sufficient, I prefer to have less self-esteem.

[13:16]

Okay. Now we have a problem with words like self. Now I want to, I think maybe before I speak about that further, I'd like to come back to attention. And I don't remember, it's not so recently I've spoken about this. Well, last weekend. But I don't know if I spoke about it here last year because it's fairly recent that I'm making this distinction. So I want to make a distinction between attention and consciousness. And if I said it before, let me say it again. I'm conscious in this room.

[14:34]

But I can move attention around within that consciousness. I can bring attention to Horst. Which is rather nice to do. And then I can move attention to Andrea, say. Now, is attention just a kind of wave, a kind of part of consciousness pulled up and then focused? Even if it can be understood that way, if we use the metaphor liquid, it might just be a different kind of liquid that merges with consciousness, but you can kind of separate it. Because clearly, I mean it's clear that consciousness and attention are closely related.

[15:42]

I think you can experience every morning when you wake up. Usually what first appears is attention. The clock or the light or something. And if you move that attention around it's almost like a kind of paintbrush that begins painting Or again, I've been using the image of the flashlight.

[16:42]

Perhaps it's a little flashlight, and it seems to leave light behind. Light at this area, and then it stays lit, etc., As I said the other day, watching Sophia and my other two daughters form their consciousness, I would say, for sure, they had attention virtually from birth, but not consciousness. And, yeah, and they... She poked around with her attention, but didn't hold things consciously.

[17:53]

But that poking around with attention was the process of developing consciousness. And I forget there's a term for the fact that you don't remember much before two or three years old. And children I've known who've lost their mother or father, four, five or even, they don't have any memory of their parents. Any conscious memory. It's sort of sad. You know, I'm so old, you know. And Sophia's so young. I sort of always hoped, I guess I hope I live long enough to be in her memory.

[19:10]

I don't know why I'm a little attached to her remembering me at least. And I think probably it would be good for her too if she'd like to have a memory of her father. But that brings us to one of the main things I'm trying to speak about. When Sophia was very tiny, I would say she didn't have a consciousness. which created a past or retained a past. So then we can ask what kind of consciousness retains a past And creates a past.

[20:15]

Retains and creates. Retains is to keep. Then we can have the question, do we at the present have a consciousness which one part creates the past? and remembers the past, and one part doesn't create a past. Okay, so attention is clearly related to as parent, we could say that

[21:28]

Attention is probably the parent of consciousness. And then attention is probably also a child of consciousness. Attention produces consciousness and then is derived from consciousness. But my point is that attention isn't just a part of consciousness. Again, my example is, when you go to sleep, you can bring attention across the bump. And if you get so you can do that, then immediately you have lucid dreaming.

[22:42]

Or even if you don't bring attention across the bump into sleep, and I say bump because it's a little, I find at least in my body, a little shift. And then I can feel I am gone to sleep. But anyway, even if you don't do that, you can have attention in a dream. And I think that's better than saying you're conscious during the dream. I think it's stretching the definition of consciousness to call it consciousness. It's better to call it attention. So you can have attention in a dream and then decide

[23:45]

As I said the other day, you can throw a little rope out to the dock of consciousness. And then you can sort of pull consciousness into the dream. Or vice versa, if you can remember where you Through the rope, when you're awake, you can find the rope and pull the dream into consciousness. And this kind of thing happens much more clearly in meditative meditation experience. And one of the skills you have to have

[25:17]

To study the mind in meditation is a non-interfering, observing attention. And if your non-interfering, observing attention carries consciousness with it, It takes you out of meditation. So in sum, attention can be part of consciousness, And tension can also be separate from consciousness. This is a parallel observation. You can have observing mind and observing self. And you can have a tension which is consciousness and a tension which is not consciousness.

[26:32]

So what kind of knowing occurs in non-conscious attention? Okay, now... So now does non-conscious attention produce karma? Now I couldn't even say that unless I created all these terms. Now this is an interesting practice question, at least for someone like myself. Does non-conscious attention produce karma, memory and a past? I mean, we have a legal problem. Sorry, I stole that car in non-conscious attention. I'm not responsible.

[27:55]

But I've known alcoholics who say something similar. I didn't drink for two or three months and then I found myself in a bar drunk. I don't know how I got there. Yeah. So, we should take a break soon. So I'm trying to find a word. As I said, first we need to say what I just said. I need terms. Okay. So we can create new terms like MemScience. And we can redefine or... develop the definition of something like attention.

[29:07]

Und wir können Worte wie Aufmerksamkeit redefinieren und neue Bedeutungen dafür finden. And then be aware that consciousness develops attention and attention develops consciousness. Und dann können wir dessen gewahr werden, dass die Aufmerksamkeit das Bewusstsein, aber das Bewusstsein auch die Aufmerksamkeit entwickelt. Yeah, I mean, if I'm doing Duxan, this is not that Duxan is the... It means to go alone. It's the one-to-one meeting between a teacher and a practitioner. And it has to be similar in some ways to psychotherapy. But part of the skill of doing Doksan is you bring attention to the situation but not consciousness.

[30:09]

I mean you wouldn't be surprised, somebody rings the bell and they come in, you wouldn't be a bit surprised if it was a Martian or an alien. And he said, like the cartoon, take me to your leader. But anyway, you bring attention and you don't hardly know who's in front of you. And you let attention assemble the situation. And then what's interesting about that is you don't Until you reassemble that attention at the next doksan, you don't remember what happened at the previous doksan.

[31:24]

Now, perhaps in training to be a therapist, you're taught to distinguish attention from consciousness. You're taught to develop attention. Perhaps it's part of training to be a therapist. To develop attention separate from consciousness. Etc. So, Now, what I'm saying is, in a way what's harder is taking a word that you use all the time and finding a different way to use it.

[32:25]

And last year when we met, I spoke about situated immediacy. And Cornelia reminded me of that. She told me she did a transcription and she mentioned the word situated immediacy. Oh yeah, I talked about that. So I'm continuing from that. this year.

[33:27]

And now I prefer to use situate, instead of situated in the past, situate immediately. Okay, so situate immediacy is a word for the present. I mean, the word present is like a box with no doors. But situate immediacy, you can sort of, well, I'm situated and it's immediate and yeah. So, but I still want to use the word present sometimes. So I've tried the operative present, the functioning present, etc.

[34:38]

And so far the term that works for me is the manifold aggregate present. If I just say the aggregate present, aggregate is to collect. But aggregate means to collect. In English, it means to collect as a sum or a whole or a totality. So when the aggregate is together, you have everything. So then I have to add a manifold. Because it's not a totality. So somehow we have to get the feeling of the present as a process, not as a unit.

[35:56]

The present as smoke or as light. Let's go back to the flashlight. You're not going to think of the light of a flashlight as a unit, as an entity. The light is clearly something other than an entity. So maybe we should think of the present as a kind of light. That we're functioning within. Or a street, you know, Mikhail Podgorshek designed a lot of the street lamps in Vienna.

[37:10]

Maybe we have a flashlight under a street lamp. Maybe the flashlight is the operand self. And the street lamp is the present. Something like that. And, you know, we get the weather report. The guy on television or whatever it is, on Marie-Louise's... walkie talkie fireman's radio. We hear it every morning. It tells you the weather as if it's going to happen in the unit called day. In today's box there will be sun.

[38:22]

Even the weather, which is so clearly a process, we talk about it as if it was happening. In a unit. So here I'm trying to find words we can use internally, if not externally. In particular for the present tense. and the self. And now we can maybe start speaking about what are the constituents of the present. But one of the important constituents of the present is the box at the break.

[39:29]

Let's have a pause.

[39:30]

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