is the same as the last picture of going into the marketplace perfectly enlightened, bestowing blessings on everybody you meet. And so now I would like to point out that they're non-dual. The samsara of the beginning picture and the nirvana of the last picture are non-dual. You do not have to move to go from one. They're not separate. Matter of fact, in order to realize that one and ten are the same, we must remember stillness. We must perceive stillness, practice stillness, and transmit stillness. The remembering stillness, receiving stillness, practicing stillness, and transmitting stillness is Nirvana.

[01:10]

It's peace. It's freedom. It's what we all want. It's unceasing, unthinkable, unnameable, unspoutable love in all directions. from us to others and from others to us. That nirvana and samsara are non-dual. And this class is a class of ten oxherding pictures that are supposed to be Zen oxherding pictures. So Zen, which emphasizes that practice, even before you even are practicing, even before you even think of practicing, all you know is that you're confused, and you hardly even know that, and you're frightened and you're longing.

[02:13]

That state is non-dual with the highest state. And yet, here's a class which is going to teach stages between these two states which are non-dual. And all the stages, in a sense, which these non-dual conditions embrace, they're also non-dual. The process is non-dual with the beginning and the end. And also, I don't say, be still. I could, but I'm trying to make it easy on you. So I don't say, be still. Because if I say, be still, somebody might think they're supposed to do something. As soon as you do the slightest thing, you kind of enter the dream of movement.

[03:19]

From here to stillness. No, no. You don't have to move to be still. So I don't say be still, I just say remember it. It's already here. It's always here. We're always still. Remember it. And then also remember that you didn't give it to yourself. It was given to you. And also, you are giving it back. That's the practice. And then transmit it. and try to remember that while we're studying these . Please.

[04:21]

which is called, what's it called? seeing the traces. And also, as I mentioned before, there are different versions of the 10 oxalating pictures. Well, actually, there's a couple. There's versions that I know of of the 10 oxalating pictures. And there's also six oxalating pictures and five oxalating pictures. And I think it's just too confusing to look at the different ones. So we might have to have four classes if you want to look at the other ones. I think it's too difficult to remember stillness if we're juggling all those at the same time. That's like 30 balls. So we're looking at the one which is given by a Chinese, a Sung dynasty,

[05:22]

Soong Dynasty, like somebody who lived in the 11th and 12th century, probably the 12th century, this person lived. His name's Gao An. Shir Yan. Shir Yan. Gao An. Lived in the 1100s. And he wrote these poems with introduction. He may have drawn pictures too, but I don't think we have his pictures. We have other people's pictures. Ten poems, his poems, his ten poems with ten introductions. And in his pictures, as you can see, the ox doesn't really change colors. It's kind of like his pictures are about a relationship with the ox that's developing.

[06:27]

There's other pictures, as I mentioned, where the ox starts black and becomes white. This one is about getting, becoming intimate with somebody, with something. Yes? Yes? What I said was that Gowan is credited with writing 10 poems with 10 names for each poem and 10 introductions to each poem. And he may have made paintings because it's called Oxherding Pictures. So he may have made paintings, but we don't have them. And then in like the, and 16th and 17th and 18th and 19th and 20th and maybe also already in this 21st century people have been making paintings of his ten poems.

[07:31]

So his poems make a picture and people then make actually paint pictures of his poems. Oh, I didn't give them to you? I didn't give them to you because I told you you can get them online. And there's lots of different ones. I don't know which one you want to use. It's just a lot of paper. But I'll read you the poems. And if you want your own copy, go online, 10 Oxford in Pictures. And in these pictures, the ones I gave you are on the Wikipedia article, and it has the poems. Yeah. Yeah. Say it louder. I don't know exactly, but maybe it's because I don't want you to attach to the words.

[08:49]

And I don't think you're going to attach to these pictures because they're I think they're less likely that you think you can see the meaning in them that you're going to attach to. This person wrote these poems, but I don't want you to attach to his poem or anything, even though I'll read it to you. For example, Galan didn't know what the ox was. Or who the ox is. Well, he sort of did. Who might the ox be? Hmm? What might the ox be? It might be enlightenment. What else might it be?

[09:50]

Hmm? What? It might be ego. Ego? Might be ego. What else might it be? Our true nature might be our true nature. What else might the ox be? An ox. It might be an ox. And the ox, who's an ox? What might that ox be? Be a life force. It might be You being you. Not just you. More like the ox being the ox might be the ox. Yeah. Mm-hmm. So one interpretation of these pictures is that there are ten phases of the full moon of enlightenment.

[11:03]

There are ten phases of us becoming completely who we are, or what we are, which is enlightenment. And of course, the way we are right now, of course, must be non-dual with us being what we are. And yet, most people have a really hard time what they are moment by moment. Again, being still. It's quite difficult. It's easier to be almost anybody but ourself. And all we've got to do is be ourself, and that's enlightenment. And yet, ability and skill at that, in some sense, can evolve. But it evolves in stillness.

[12:08]

It evolves in stillness. You don't have to go someplace to get closer to yourself. Or not even closer. You don't have to go someplace to realize your intimacy with yourself. And my intimacy with myself is... the entire universe. Each of you being who you are is the entire universe functioning peacefully. But being misled into thinking that we can be other than ourselves is delusion. I think this is the poem for the first picture.

[13:47]

Alone in the wilderness, lost in the jungle, a girl is searching, searching. Waters, faraway mountains, and the unending path. Exhausted, And in despair, she knows not where to go. She only hears evening cicadas singing in the maple woods. That's Gowon's poem. And then his comment is, the beast has never gone astray. What is the use of searching for her? The reason that Oxford cannot be intimate with her is that he has violated his own most nature.

[15:01]

Yes, Kim. By looking outside himself for himself. By turning away from himself. By trying to get a hold of himself. By forgetting stillness. Yeah, so I'm pointing out, remember, that the Chinese character is a character for... But the basic bovine is, you know, female.

[16:25]

Mostly there's cows. So it's cow, bull, and ox. All the same character. In English we have three words. And they do have words for, you know, female cow. But that's usually two characters. The one character is means cow, bull, and ox. And then you have to make compounds to have it be clearly only a cow, clearly only a bull, and clearly only an ox. Like a buffalo, same character. A compound makes a buffalo. And then another compound makes a bison. And then there's water buffalo, which is a water cow. So it can be bull, cow, and the cowherd can be a boy or a girl. So he can be looking for her. She can be looking for her.

[17:26]

He can be looking for him. It can be looking for it. Lois. Pardon? Pardon? Yeah? I think those were originally his, yeah. No, I think those were originally with the poem. I don't know. There probably was, but maybe they weren't good enough to say. Maybe he wasn't a good painter. So people didn't save his paintings. Yes, Robin. Violate. You what about it?

[18:46]

Curious. You're curious about violation? I think being curious about violation is kind of like the next picture. If you're curious about violation, maybe that's a trace of The ox. When you're curious, what have I done? How have I strayed away from? I lose the ox. Like, first, I have no idea where the ox is, and I don't have any energy to look. I'm just a wreck. However, the picture says, still, there's somebody singing. Now, the second picture, you're maybe a little... you have heard about the violation of your inmost nature. In other words, you've heard a teaching now. So this is the first picture, but now the poem about the first picture has given you a teaching about the first picture.

[19:55]

And hearing the teaching of the first picture, you have a question. You're curious. That's the beginning of your particular, that's the first maybe track that you've seen tonight. You're actually either thinking that maybe that question will lead me back to my antidote, the violation of my nature. Maybe you're not thinking of that, but maybe that curiosity will do that. It will take you back to yourself. How have I gotten away from myself is a path. Could be. Could it be even, like you said, who drove me away from myself? Did my parents and teachers and friends drive me away from myself? Did they tell me, don't be yourself?

[20:56]

Like, you know, you're a big girl. Don't cry. You know that one? Don't be a crybaby. Did that drive you away from yourself? Or you could have had another different kind of parent who said, who must say to you, are you dwelling in your tears at all? You seem to be crying. Are you intimate with those tears? Boy? Well, the boy might be... Somebody said ego. Might be ego. Or another way is that the boy or the girl might be our consciousness.

[21:58]

Might be our consciousness. Which... in the beginning, which feels confused and frightened and longing in consciousness, and there's a somebody's there in consciousness. So in these pictures, the ox herd is often talked about, the ox herd is training the ox. The ox herd is training the Buddha mind. Or is the Buddha mind training the ox herd? It seems pretty likely that they're training each other. Because the training the Buddha mind ox that's training the ox herd it can't train the ox herd unless the ox herd trains it.

[23:07]

It has to be mutual. It has to be mutual. And this is a point which we may find has been made by the poet. But we'll see. Even if it hasn't, it's that the consciousness is training the great perfect wisdom of the Buddha, Aksh. And the only way that perfect wisdom can train living is through the consciousness, through the oxer. That's how we get trained. And that's another way that the ox, or the Buddha mind, relates to us, is in our consciousness, and those tracks are words, or pictures of word, word pictures in our consciousness.

[24:09]

That's our mind training in intimacy with the ox, and it's the ox coming into offering us a chance to train it, which is to train ourselves. And the questions which are coming up now, I think, again, they're like the second picture. They're the beginning. of the ox in our consciousness. The question, who is the ox herd, is a trace of the ox in consciousness. And then I would say, which the poem doesn't say so clearly, I would say, when the traces of the ox appear in consciousness, remember stillness. if we are in the first picture, exhausted, frightened, confused, disoriented, discouraged, depressed, if we're there, and we're still, if we remember stillness in that not very nice situation, tracks appear.

[25:39]

What are the tracks? Questions about the ox. Questions about Buddha nature, or about Buddha. Do it two more times. Yes? The words do. The words do. Yeah. And vice versa. If you look at the pictures, and we look at the words, the pictures will take you away from the words. Being taken away from words by the pictures, or being taken away from the pictures by the words, that's the first picture.

[26:47]

The first picture is about being taken away by word, by word pictures. That sounds good. She's confused. That's the first picture. No. Yes. Both what? Being told something by the words? That we're trying to look for clues to what this means. I think I understand what you're saying.

[27:57]

And do you want to hear something? The situation you just described of being taken away by the words, that's the first situation. That's our basic human situation, is that we are being taken away, not by malicious intent of a self necessarily. We're being taken away by the what's going on in consciousness. And what's going on in consciousness is words. And you have just told us the situation of the first picture, that you actually are kind of having a sense that you're being taken away from what's going on by words. That's the first picture. And I'm not exactly praising the first picture. I'm just saying, cautioning very emphatically not to run away from being taken away from reality.

[29:01]

Our basic samsaric suffering is that words are taking us away from ourself. Pictures, like pictures of other people, smiling faces, frowning faces, people saying nice things to us or not nice things to us, all this word picture stuff going on in consciousness, it takes us away from intimacy with the ox. Now we have words about the ox, so we can again experience that when we have some words about the ox, that they take us away too. It's just that they do. And all the words of all these poems, we will be at risk of being taken away every step of the way. And if we're completely taken away, then we're just staying in the first stage. It's not so bad because the first stage is the same as the last stage.

[30:04]

But if we try to get away from the first stage, we will not realize that the first stage is not separate from the last stage. And if we accept the first stage and get away from it, then we will see the second stage. And although we see the second stage, it's not that we get to the second stage by trying to go away from the first stage. If we're trying to get away from it, we're in the first stage. In the first stage, people are trying to get out of it. If we're still in the first stage, we have a chance to realize the tenth right then. But also, it's quite likely that in the first stage, if we accept it, it will just pop up. Not because we went there, but because it's a reward for being still in the first stage.

[31:09]

So when you're still in the first stage, you start seeing tracks. You start saying, hey, I think I just saw some tracks of Buddha. I saw some enlightenment tracks. I saw some questions about how I get taken away. I saw some curiosity about what is the ox? What is Buddha? But that comes to me living way when I'm willing to be in the first stage. If I'm not willing to be in the first stage, then what is Buddha is like just compounding the first stage, trying to get something, rather than just actually just being curious. I sort of wonder what Buddha is, but I have no interest in him. And I'm certainly not trying to get Buddha. But even though I'm not trying to get Buddha, I'm kind of interested in what Buddha is.

[32:13]

And I'm also kind of interested in who I am, kind of wondering who I am too. Now, by the way, What am I? And I've heard that wondering what I am has something to do with wondering what Buddha is. So can we just continuously not abide in the first stage? No, not abide. Not abide. Just remember stillness in the first stage. So we don't abide in the first stage and we don't abandon it. Don't abide in it and don't go away from it. Not abiding in it, we will realize, yay, that is the tenth stage. And also not abiding in it, we will realize and see the second stage and so on. I think you were ahead of Tracy, because you had your hand up for a long time ago, didn't you?

[33:18]

A little while ago. A little while ago. Now. So you can talk now, if you want to. Sure. So I went over and read those poems on Wikipedia, and I looked at how the description of how the first poem is similar to the last poem. But in the translation that you read here, I didn't quite see that because I was with it all the way until you got to exhausted and miserable. The miserable sounds like clinging. The translation I read, I didn't see clinging in the ones that were on high. It didn't say miserable. It said, my strength failing and my mentality exhausted, I cannot fight.

[34:20]

And that sounds like I could be okay with that. Like, okay, I've made it. I'm all the way here. I'm exhausted, but it's okay to be exhausted. So I wonder about that, that miserable translation, or the word miserable being in the translation. Yeah. Last week we were talking about this situation and people talked about fear and longing and things like that. So, that's part of it. But also, if there is any misery, okay, put it in these ten pictures. We've got to include it. So I think it should be in the first stage and it should be in the last stage because in the last stage he's in the marketplace with all these miserable people. So I don't see the word misery here either.

[35:22]

I did see exhausted and I did see that the mountains are far away. But also in the first stage there is somebody singing there. Nature is right there singing but he doesn't really hear it. that is being sung to him. Because he's concerned about these swollen waters and faraway mountains. He's kind of bereft. So maybe miserable isn't literally there. But if anybody feels miserable in this class, then let's be with that misery. You can put as much misery you want into the first stage or any stage. So the misery doesn't go away in the second stage. It's just in the second stage, there's some tracks. In the first stage, there's no tracks. There's no sense of where to go. Second stage, there's some sense of someplace to go. But all suffering is in every stage.

[36:24]

So if the first picture, if the first poem, first picture are saying the last poem, in a way, isn't it because there's no separation? Yeah. Because there's no separation and because they're the same thing. There's no separation and they are the same thing. But in the first stage, there seems to be not realization of stillness. Ignorance of that no separation. seems to be taken away. But it also says, the commentary says, but the host, the cow, has never gone away. The Buddha has never gone away. It's just that the cowherd feels like he's lost it because he's gone away from himself. So in the first stage, which is not separate from the last one,

[37:27]

the cow herd has gone away from himself. And it doesn't say, and when you go away from yourself, you're miserable. Going away from ourself is my... If I was doing his paintings, I would have put the cow right back there in the bush behind him. In the first painting? Because it's there. I think there are some paintings where the cow is... but anyway he apparently he doesn't see the cow he doesn't even see any tracks and he feels disoriented lost and so on but really the cow hasn't gone any place but he has betrayed himself so the first bodhisattvas should not betray the first picture we should not abandon the first picture and we should not abide in the first picture being still in the first picture, you don't abandon it and you don't abide in it.

[38:34]

When you don't abide in it, there's revelations. Revelations are occurring in the same place where all living beings with all their problems are there, but now you see some tracks. Tracy and then Eric. Eric? They look different, but they're not separate, and they're not dual. They're not separate, they're not dual. They are the same thing, they are the same thing, and they're different. The first and the second are non-dual, but the second has some tracks. has some hints, has some curiosity. The first one doesn't even really have curiosity.

[39:35]

It has more like desperation and despair. How are one and ten more the same? I think because in ten there's a perfect realization of not going the slightest bit away from one. In 2, you have not realized 10. So when you see the traces, you might a little bit again betray yourself and go after the traces. But 10 is not moving. 10 is realized not going anyplace. Therefore, it's complete as 1. where one doesn't even know any place to go, so it doesn't. Two, it's a little bit tricky because you see some traces now. And then we get later ones, you're going to get into training. It's a little tricky. So in a way, they're all non-dual, and they're all not separate.

[40:42]

And how can we deal with difference and remember stillness? That's the challenge. But in this class, I had a vision. It was revealed to me. We did enough work on the first one, and we were still enough with it that I saw the second one pop up there. I wasn't trying to make you be in the second stage, but I thought you demonstrated it very nicely with your questions. Eric? Where's the movement in abiding? Did you say? Well, it doesn't seem to. It doesn't have a big movement quality, does it?

[41:50]

It is still, but you don't realize it. When you don't realize stillness, you feel stuck. So abiding has a quality of, you know, when you're abiding, then you're, what do you call it, at risk of turning away or holding on. So the abiding itself doesn't seem to be a movement, but it puts you at risk for movement, whereas stillness doesn't put you at risk for movement. Abiding people are either holding on or they're just about ready to get up because they feel trapped. So they want to get out. And maybe they feel safe, so they want to hold on. Or maybe they feel not safe, so they think they have to move to be safe. That's what it's like to abide. Abiding does have laziness in it.

[43:22]

When you're enthusiastic, that helps you, that gives you the energy to not abide. to remember stillness and not be stuck. In the Bodhisattva training there's generosity, ethics, patience, energy, not being lazy, and then entering into stillness. So I think oversleeping or indulging and staying in that state a little longer, it's kind of, what about inner indolence, that laziness, But even so, you can be still with that laziness. And if you're still with the laziness, it doesn't make the laziness go away, it's just you're not dwelling in it, you're free of it. Yes?

[44:26]

Well, not abandoning is, which certainly goes with being mindful of whatever it is, like ...samsara, not abandoning the realm of misery. Not abandoning, being mindful of it. Okay? But not dwelling in it. Could be identifying. Mm-hmm. Um... It could be a wide range of delusions, a wide range of afflictions. So we are encouraged to let go, to renounce affliction, to renounce our ideas about what's going on, but not abandon suffering beings. Which in not abandoning them is, remember, being still with them, Be mindful of them, be mindful of it, but be willing to let go of it.

[45:56]

So letting go of suffering without abandoning it. Letting go and continuing to be intimate. This is also jumping ahead to training the ox. Subtle shift to the third one, which you can look at the third one. So now it's called seeing the ox. So there's some tracks. We've seen some tracks. There's some traces of what? Of the ox. Some traces of the Buddha mind, some traces of us being ourself. Now, apparently we're going to see a little bit more.

[46:59]

The boy finds the way, or first I'll do the poem. On the yonder branch perches a nightingale singing. The sun is warm and a soothing breeze flows. On the bank, the willows are green. The cow is there all by herself. Nowhere is she to hide herself. The splendid head decorated with stately horns. What painter can reproduce her? So now we're in a very nice setting.

[48:04]

Beautiful ox all by herself. I mean beautiful cow all by herself. Beautiful ox all by himself. On the bank of the river there's reeds which are green, there's a soothing wind blowing, and there's a nightingale perched on a branch singing. This is the third stage. The commentary is, the boy finds the way by the sound he hears. She sees thereby the origin of things and her senses are in harmony. In all her activities it is manifestly present. In all her activities it is manifestly present.

[49:12]

It is like salt in water and glue in color. in color. Yeah, it's kind of funny, glue and color. I guess maybe, you know, they put glue or something in paint, in dyes, so it'll stick. So that's an image of in something, but you don't see it, but it's in there. So it is manifestly present. though not separately distinguishable. When the I is properly directed, she will find that it is not other than herself. I don't think the artist was reading the poem. This...

[50:18]

Not at all what is described. There's no river. You can't even see the head. There's no stately horns. You don't see the stately horns on the head? No friend. Hi. That artist here for you to talk to. Don't you? Yeah. Okay. Tony. Yeah. And not only do you see the ox, but in the commentary it says you see that it's none other than yourself.

[51:40]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, [...] no. You don't take it with you. It hasn't gone anywhere either. You're in the same situation. It's just that you've evolved. Now you're in a situation with all confusion, disorientation, longing, fear. It's all still here. It hasn't gone anywhere. You haven't gone anywhere. It's just that the second dawn. So in this situation now you see tracks. And now you actually see the ox, and you see the ox as yourself. You see that your confusion is yourself. You see that your fear is yourself. It's not out there. And you see that the Buddha nature is yourself. Not the Buddha nature, the Buddha mind.

[52:45]

You see all that now in this, and that is rather tranquil. That is good. But you don't have to go anyplace. You don't have to reduce the misery to see the... You don't have to amp it up either. Same situation, always in the same situation, always in samsara, and never dwelling in it. The training is training and not dwelling in samsara. And also nirvana. If we dwelled in nirvana, then samsara wouldn't be here. But we don't dwell in nirvana. We haven't even got there yet, even though it has always been present in a non-dual way. Nirvana was present in the first picture. It was present in the second picture. And here's the presence, not just of nirvana, there's the presence of the Buddha mind.

[53:49]

And the Buddha mind, nirvana and samsara are inseparable. The Buddha realizes nirvana, but the whole point of realizing nirvana is to help people go to nirvana, not to stay there. Buddha doesn't dwell in nirvana, except for a flash. Yes? Tell me your name again. Lauren? Lauren? Lorna? Lorna, as in Lorna Dune? Okay. Oh, great. I can make you think that, and even if the picture didn't make you think that, I agree with you. You have to work. Work at what? Work at not forgetting stillness.

[54:52]

It's a job. It's a big job. Have any of you tried it lately? He said to me, I was just in Texas and I went to Texas and I didn't forget stillness as I was flying through the air. Anyway, I got to Texas and somebody said, when I'm sitting in meditation, I find that I think about my job a lot. And I said, I've heard about that And I said, I have this great job. My job is to remember stillness. So when I'm sitting, I think about my job, which is to remember stillness. And I said, guess what? I have a job for you. You can have my job. And that can be your main job. And when you think about your secondary job, the one you get paid for, do your real job and be still with thinking about your at the office or whatever.

[56:02]

And that's work. That's a job. You have to work to remember to be still with each one of these stages and not get confused and think you're going someplace when you go from one to three and so on. So it is, it is. A good part of that picture is it shows that it's hard work not to go anyplace. Or not, you know, to remember not going anyplace. It is a job. It's hard work to be yourself. So I hope these pictures encourage you and give you some, will give you more and more support in being yourself. So one instruction is just be yourself and leave me alone. Another instruction is, okay, here's ten pictures about being yourself. Another class is just be yourself at your job.

[57:06]

Of course that's your job. And there's no job harder. And no job more necessary. And no job more appropriate. And each of us has the job of being ourself. And the world has gone to a lot of trouble to make you. So please, you know, accept the gift and take care of it. And it's really hard to accept the gift. Isn't it? It's hard. It comes with everything. The second picture. All that comes with being you. And the stillness... is the job of being yourself, and then you will be able to see these ten stages. And you will be able to not abide in any of them. The tenth stage, the person is bestowing blessings, but that person is not dwelling in being a blesser. Not stuck in being the blessing of the world.

[58:12]

And that's the blessing of the world. And in the first stage, the first day is not stuck in being a blessing in the world. It would like to be, and that's the misery of the world. There's love throughout. But if we shrink away from ourself, this hard person that it's to be with, if we back away, it's like the love doesn't go away. Like it says, the ox has never gone astray, but the ox herd has gone away from himself. When he went away from himself, he went away from the ox. He went away from the love which the ox is. The ox is total, unconditioned, perfect love.

[59:14]

You see a lot of love in the fear? Okay, go ahead. She's going to say something silly. I saw a lot of love in the tail. We used to have this little Jack Russell and she had this tail that just stuck straight up and just quivered with energy. Yes, Ira? I had this realization that there's always suffering. Is that also what you were saying? There's also suffering in all these stages. There's suffering in all these stages. Yes. And in all these stages, there's peace and harmony and ease with the suffering.

[60:32]

There's a joy of being intimate with the suffering and thereby liberating it in all these pictures. And yet there's different phases of realizing this, different phases of realizing that nirvana is inseparable from the first picture, and that the first picture is inseparable from the other ones. There's stages of realization of that, and that's what we have ten here, is to talk about stages. and yet there are stages without going any place, and there are stages which are not separate. And to realize the stages and move through them, we have of being still in each stage. If you're still in the first phase, you'll see the second phase. But you won't see the second phase before, and then you'll see the third phase if you're still in the second phase. But you won't actually see, part of this is to suggest, you won't see the third before the second.

[61:37]

There's an order included in each other. Yes? It's not in time, but when you put it in time, this is what enlightenment looks like in time. So really, enlightenment is freedom from time. There is great in stillness.

[62:43]

And when we're involved in movement, there's activity too. When we see movement, we see activity also. But the greatest activity is in stillness. The fullest activity is in stillness. Let's see. Margie hasn't been called upon yet. When you say perceived stillness, what about receiving it? Yes, receiving is part of it because it's given to us by our, all that supports us, all that creates us, gives us stillness. You are being made this way and no other way.

[63:45]

And that's your stillness. And so when you receive yourself, you're also receiving stillness. Yep. Yep. Yeah. And yeah. Right. Just like you received the way you were earlier today, you received the way you were yesterday, you received the way you were when you were a little girl, you did. But you weren't trained well enough when you were a little girl to actually realize that the way you were being made and receiving was actually received in stillness and you were still when you received it.

[64:48]

And because you receive it, you can't move from where you are. Because of all it makes you, you are unmoving. And that way you're making is basically a cosmic activity. It's a tremendous activity. And when we move away from that, it's like we downplay some aspect of our relationships. The way you're making me right now makes me still. And if I don't appreciate my stillness, I don't appreciate how you make me. In that sense, I move away from how you all support me. And that's another big job you have. All day long, you have to make me. And not just me. You make the rest of the universe too. The one thing you don't make is guess what?

[65:53]

Right. And a synonym is you. You don't make yourself. You being you is stillness. You do not make yourself be you. The universe makes you. Being stillness is kind of like a big thank you to being who you are. Even when you're suffering. I wouldn't exactly say most importantly when you're suffering. whatever you are. The biggest suffering is that you won't be suffering one day? Oh, that's a big suffering?

[67:06]

So when you say that's the biggest suffering, then that, in my mind, that sounds like that's the hardest thing to deal with. Being still with that thing you're afraid of That's who you really are. That's who you really are. When you're afraid of that, being still with them, you really are. That's enlightenment. And any other fears you want to tell me about, being still with them, that's enlightenment. Tell me about the medium-sized ones and the biggest ones, whatever they are, being still with them is being who you are. So you just told me what's really hard for you to be still with. And I hear you and I'm saying, okay, there's your job.

[68:10]

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