So, last evening, we ended a three-day session, the first multi-day session we've done at Dragon's End Gate since December 2019. And today is the last day, last Darmatop formally of the practice commitment period, the first practice period we've done since 2018. So, I first want to start by just acknowledging, well, how wonderful it is to have our Sangha back on track, in some sense, during the practice period and doing a multi-day session, feel to me like landlords in something new, and in something old, and maybe also blue, I don't

[01:13]

know. Anyway. We are back. The session was wonderful. I felt for three days the steadiness of people and a number of the people who are here tonight and also here for that. We did Zazen together, and we did service, and we had meals in Zendo, but I also feel like we need to recognize how much of a disjunction the pandemic was for our Sangha and for everybody, for our world and for our country. So we have to renew, and it's not the same as it was.

[02:16]

Since we lost our Zendo, we're in this wonderful new interim Zendo, we are actively involved in looking for a long-term new space, and there was a lot of injuries to the world over this Zendo. Along with, of course, all the people in this country who have passed away, many of us here have had COVID. Maybe that's a good thing, we're getting back immunized. Anyway, it's a time of change. We have this online situation, and we're looking to develop our hybrid system, and, you know,

[03:22]

we're not doing too bad on this, and we have lots of people who joined us for the Sesshin and for getting some response in many ways. And also, we have this nice, warm Zendo space to sit in person. But a lot of people were damaged in ways we don't necessarily realize. And all the younger people, we have a number of schoolteachers in our Sangha, one of them was describing his fourth grade class and all the struggles to keep them going, given

[04:33]

that they missed two years of regular school. So, it's an interesting, potentially creative new situation, and also, we've lost a lot of folks. And because of the hybrid and Zoom, we have also gained the possibility to sit together with people at a great distance, so our Sangha has expanded in that way. And the people of the world have had this transformation. And we know there is lots of situations of suffering all over the world. People in this country were relatively in good condition compared to most places in

[05:40]

the world, in a lot of ways. So this practice period, we used as a focusing text the Seatail of the Malakirti, who was according to the Sutra, a great awakened layperson in Buddha's time, highly awakened. And many interesting things happened in this Sutra, very colorful stories. But on one level, it's just about practicing in the world. So the Malakirti entered all kinds of ordinary spaces in the world, challenging spaces in the world, and was sawed-record in each of them as the best there, and used the situations

[06:41]

of all those places to help awaken the people. Maybe it's worth mentioning that in this assembly, at first in front of the Buddha, then they all go and occupy the Malakirti's house, and his sit-room, because he's ill, and it's a room maybe half the size of the Senya. And yet, an amazing number of beings are able to fit into it. So one of the things that the Sutra does is to undercut our usual sense of space and time, dimensions. So I think maybe for some people in the practice period, this part was uncomfortable,

[07:48]

for some people it was entertaining. But also, there's this inconceivable teaching that's in line with the Avatamsaka Flower Arrangement Sutra, which is very, very important in Soto Zen, but in which there are wild things that happen. And it's based on the teaching of inconceivability, that we can't possibly conceive and perceive of everything that is happening in our world and in front of us, even though part of our practice is supposed to just meet each thing in front of us. So to have a sense of humility about what we can know, what we can see, to be patient with that. One of the signature teachings of the Buddha Kirti Sutra, now let's say the Sanskrit word for this, I'll say one last time,

[08:50]

patience, patience with the fact that we cannot get a hold of things, that everything in our world is ungraspable, that we can't think beyond birth and death, that we don't, we can't really understand completely or control everything that's happening. So this is an important teaching for us. We're taught in our educational systems, or most of them, to try and make progress, control things, and understand things, and some things can't be understood, and how things change can't be understood. So the question is, and the question that's brought up in the Sutra is,

[09:54]

how do we help beings? So I talked during the session about the Buddha work, and the Sutra talks about that, doing the Buddha work, and as Bodhisattva practitioners, that's what we're all doing. We're doing Buddha work, we are expressing awakening, and supporting awakening, and kindness, and helpfulness in the world, in all the realms of the world in which we are occupying. So I'm just sort of summarizing some of what we've been talking about during the last three days of Sheen, during the last two months practice period, and probably important pieces of this that I've not mentioned. Well, the teaching about Buddha

[10:56]

fields, that when a Buddha awakens, they constantly have a field of awakening, that our practice in the world is not just about us. It's not a self-help methodology. It's about waking up, and supporting, and being supported by everyone and everything, that we can't get ahold of things. We can't really fully grasp them. Reality itself is beyond that, and things are not just things. Everything is a lot. But the Buddha taught, this is what modern physics is demonstrating, there is our scientific ability.

[11:57]

So we live in the Buddha field of Shakyamuni Buddha, who lived in what we now call India, East India, 2500 years ago in the show. This is called the Saha world, which is the world of endurance. There are lots of challenges in the world. How do we support kindness, kind speech? I talked yesterday about Dogen's four dharmas for supporting beings. Generosity, kind speech, beneficial action, helping people. And then this cooperation or identity action, that there's this possibility of cooperating together, rather than competing or trying to take advantage of others. So we see in this world that there is lots of damage. How do we

[13:05]

oppose systems of injustice and cruelty and harm that are abundantly around us, destruction of the environment, all these difficulties? How do we do that without falling into hatred of people who are espousing that, who have been misguided into espousing that? So this is a long, long project. We have to study history, the history of our lineage and the practice of awakening, but also the history of our country, and all of it, even when it makes us uncomfortable. And we have to realize the current attack on history and study of history. Anyway, how do we act helpfully in all of this? That's the question really.

[14:10]

And how do we take care of ourselves and support each other in some way? This is another question. So Sangha is about coming together, practicing together, supporting each other. This is a challenge. How can we be willing to ask for help for people in the Sangha when we need it? How can we be open to hearing the calls for help in our Sangha and in the world? So maybe I've said enough about this past two months and this past three days, and I have to keep battling, but I'm interested in hearing what you all have to say about anything. So some of you in the room and some of you online have been part of the practice period or the three days issue, and some of

[15:15]

you have not, and that's fine. I'm interested in hearing any comments or responses to any of this that any of you may have. So comments, responses, questions, questions for the Sangha. Please feel free. I have a comment. I just thought the three-day session was lovely, because I wanted to get through the night and rain and rain and all the people we worked with to make the ten minutes successful. It really was a hard work. It really was a hard working event, and I just want to work so hard. It's a day out. It's a day out. Jerry, thank you. Well, everybody who was part of it really helped. I mean, I wasn't part of it. Yeah.

[16:15]

We could hear Laurel's screeching in the first song. And Lewis, well, you know, this was an all-inclusive event, so. Well, Simone, whoever released the name, well. Yeah, thank you, Lois, yes. So this was an actualization of the Mala Kirti's situation, us together in our life, in the garden, taking care of the Zendo, enjoying unbelievably delicious tea treats, and, you know, being tired and worried about things and everything all together. Yes, thank you.

[17:23]

Is that a Zen movie? Many movies are Zen movies. And one of the comments I really liked was from Joe, who joins us online the first day, the first time he's ever sat all day. Has he ever been here? I think he was at Ebenezer. He's one of the people who joins us online. And he nearly sat the first day, I felt it. And he said, I feel tired and rested at the same time. Which I thought was a lovely description. Any other comments or questions, please? I just was reflecting during Sashim on really, you know, the past few years, and for me,

[18:35]

I think that it wasn't so bad losing our space, but losing the structures and the forms that, you know, we kind of knew over time, and it evolved over time for that space, and you could kind of fold yourself in. And I think that a lot of work has gone into bringing those forms to how they work here, and in this situation. And I especially thank the Benson for organizing, you know, a lot of the forms are out our meal preparation. But there's been a lot of work over the past few months, since we've been in a stable space, to bring back our way of being. So it wasn't the space as much as the way of being together, that, you know, it was easy to fold yourself in on a Monday night,

[19:36]

or, you know, come up, you know, talk on a Sunday, and make tea if somebody was absent, because, you know, you kind of basically knew how to do it. And we're still, I think, you know, working on that, or I am. But I think that was the hardest thing. And at the same time, I think a lot of us were all, you know, working much harder during the pandemic, and since. And so it seemed like, you know, oh, we're busy, and everything. But I think, you know, my practice really suffered in my team, and everyone, I think, did from not having this available to us. And so that, I think, was maybe the most wonderful part of the session, was to just be held in place, again, by the forums for a significant period of time. Someone was speaking to me and said, you know,

[20:44]

I actually admire the military, someone who was in session, and said, you know, because you can, if there's a natural disaster, the National Guard assembles itself, and whatever's going on in their personal situation doesn't matter. They have the mission. And that's sort of like what I think we're coming back to, creating an environment where we can drop into the mission of inconceivable liberation of all beings, kind of kindness, and wisdom, and compassion, and coming back to do, and hearing Bert's song, you know, that we're united in the mission. I thought that was a really beautiful way to kind of describe that I think you're describing, returning to the source. Yeah, and knowing your place. And that's what we were talking about, positions. So, I only live a little more than a mile away.

[21:48]

I've done sessions, so I kept thinking about where you were during the day. Like, oh, no, there's a teeth. And so that was lovely. But I wanted to say, you know, so I keep saying that my practice suffered during the pandemic, but I'm starting to think my practice grew during the pandemic because it was so hard. I mean, life's been so hard. So many things in our lives were so hard. And I think, you know, I didn't sit every day. But I certainly was challenged by life in ways and needed to rely on practice in ways that were pretty stretchy.

[22:50]

It needed stretching. Anyway, so I'm still thinking about that. I don't know, I'm not, I don't expect to resolve it. But I want to say one other thing. Today when I, so this evening when I walked in the back, I was sitting in the garden, being the greeter in the garden. And I thought, oh, I love having a garden. And so it, as part of our Zen Talks, and so it's for those of you who are looking for another space for the future. Oh, geez, a garden. It was so beautiful to see. You're sitting in the garden, greeting us. That is offering flowers on a distant hillside to put us. Yes. We could work in the garden during work period. Yeah. Yes. During our practice in a place, it was a really big garden.

[23:56]

It was like a monophore. It was like a monophore garden. I love that. You know, I've been thinking about the forms too. And in a way, I know in COVID, you know, we all sort of, the forms sort of fell away on the circuit. But there's a, there's a plus side to that. Because one, it makes you realize two things. How important those forms are. And it makes you also not get so attached to them. I know when I first came to Ancient Dragon, I practiced for years someplace else. And their forms were confusing. And I got here, and I thought, my first couple of months was because these people are doing it all wrong. It took me a long time to figure out, okay, I realized, okay, your concept of what Zen Buddhism is really limited, girlfriend. No, you gotta like, and so in some ways, you know, there's a bonus to losing something.

[24:58]

Because it comes back sort of in a, in a bigger, stronger way. Yeah, because you can do it sort of, without, you're sort of doing it the hard way sometimes. Yes, yeah. And it sort of, and it was true even during the day that Ruben was doing it, he rang the bells completely different. And I kind of liked it. He didn't ring to everybody, he said, he said it different. So, you know, he's trained in a different way. So he was holding on to that form. Yes. Right. And so, so there's, there could be a war of forms. I think our forms come back stronger. Yeah. Because they're lighter. They're more flexible. And they're adapting to our situation and who we all are at this time. So I think there's a great, I agree. There's a great benefit. And that felt to me like we all are supporting each other with the forms,

[26:06]

not like policing them or having a war like mine is better than yours. Well, that's what he said to me later. I didn't know I was doing, I said you weren't doing it wrong. I thought it was kind of nice because it gets people used to it. There's different ways to do the same form. And it's good to have everybody get on the same train too. So we work with this. This is, so when the Zendo, when it's taken care of, people don't have to worry about they're making it fat, they're nourished. We have somebody bringing the bowels, we have cushions, you know. And we're all, we're all creating that. And sensitive to what we need now. Really lovely. Yes, it's a very creative situation. We're renewing the adornment of the way of working. New possibilities and yeah, we have to be open and flexible and creative as we settle.

[27:13]

So it's an opportunity. It's an opportunity. Yes, Mike. I found that as we settled into our forms during SESHE and obviously. A little bit louder. Oh sorry, I found that as we were settling into our forms during SESHE, even if we were rotating positions during different days, it allowed me to, or personally, to feel more intimate with everyone. Not, and feel like I was getting to know everyone better, not because we were sharing words and talking to ourselves, but the way, you know, Ruben holds his bells or the way that he eats or, you know, you observe, you know, so much, many smaller things. You're so much more aware of more things. And people who I don't know socially and haven't said, you know, five words to before, I felt so close to, you know, it was such a wonderful experience.

[28:15]

Yes, SESHE does that. And I think to follow up with what everyone is saying, especially after the pandemic and feeling so disconnected, not only from our sangha, but from the forms themselves and from practice. It was a real strengthening of my own practice to come here and then to feel this is the right place to be. Any comments from the folks online? A couple of you. A few of you, a witness, let her answer. Hi, it's Nicholas. Hi, Nicholas. Hey, it's great hearing, you know, kind of like,

[29:18]

you know, all the fermentation of the SESHE being, you know, talked about, you know, the SESHE that took place in person. And because, of course, it's not like that on Zoom at all. And the good news, I guess, is that I know exactly, I could really identify with everything that's being said, really understand, you know, the experience that everyone was having. And it's just very different on Zoom, but happy to have Zoom as a resource. I was, I guess I was struck, I really appreciated the Dharma talk and was struck by the, some things that you said about how, I think you said something like, how things change we cannot understand. And it got me thinking about how change has happened in my life.

[30:24]

And really the biggest changes in my life, I feel like I had nothing to do with. You know, they came by way of chance encounters, or just opportunities appeared out of, you know, some kind of, they were like gifted by, you know, mysterious force of kismet, or, you know, like, literally, I feel like I didn't have a lot of personal involvement in many of the best things that have happened to me in my life, that have changed me profoundly. And so it's, you know, and we go, I don't know, I just hear a lot of, and I do it myself, it's like, I speak often, like, I'm in control of my life, or I can change my life, or I can do this or do that. And it's just really what, you know, we can do a lot of things.

[31:29]

But in another way, it's like, what, what can I really do? It just seems like, you know, I'm just really kind of powerless, but I can bear witness and I can be aware of my breath. And I can try to let go. Those things I am in control of. Anyway, I'm kind of babbling at this point, but great to see all your glowing faces, and thank you to the Sangha. Thank you, Nicholas, for joining us. And yeah, we don't have total control, and yet what we can have intention, vow, commitment to, as Sharon's translation says,

[32:37]

skillful techniques, trying to help, trying to be helpful, and to be open and aware, and to not hold on to what we think everything should be. Yes, I'm reminded of a comment that, is his name Paul, lives over in the East Bay. Yeah, made a comment about vow a few weeks ago, that really struck me. Yeah, so it's about vow, right, and then see what happens. But yeah, we can always have vows. That's why we have them, I guess. By the way, that, that seeing what happens is, right, that studying the vows is important. And when that goes awry, that's important, too. Yeah, being willing to make mistakes as part of skillfulness, trial and error, and patience,

[33:47]

patience, patience. I also want to just offer that next month, many of us actually here are going to Tosfara, and the Sashin is, you know, the Great Mothership Forum, let's say, but actually the Sashin is great practice of how we blend in as community, because we'll be there with two other groups, and they're going to blend with us, and we're going to blend with the community of Tosfara. So everyone there is going to be practicing together from different places, and even like Berkeley has a little bit different situation than Tosfara, and even San Francisco and Kate Street has a little bit of difference. So we'll be fine with ourselves, but this is our opportunity also

[34:49]

to, you know, come out into the world like Bimalakirti and go to a new place and connect with this greater lineage that we're part of. So Nicholas will be joining us as well, which is really wonderful. I will, I'm so excited. We're excited. I'm excited that you'll be there, and you know, although you've been sort of this name on a screen, your beautiful voice and sincere and open comments, I think, are also just flow right with our situation. So thank you, Nicholas. Thank you. And practice with you and know you and physicality. Nicholas joined us, excuse the pun on his name, in Irving Park numbers of times, so he's a kind of veteran here. But thank you, Augusta, for leading that.

[35:50]

We're not formally in time for announcements, but I appreciate you bringing that up. And are there still spaces available, and what are the dates? Well, I don't know. I mean, there's allegedly a space or two available. So if anybody really wants to get on the train, they should hop on fairly soon. Um, you know, I kind of, Thomas Reservations knows what we have, and they offered us 14 slots. We have 12 taken, but they may have reposed some of them. They've been checking with me, but you know, it all works out. And I think it's like the 26th of June to the 2nd of July. That's my recollection. Thank you. Wade? It's a little bit like we're all origins in one body. And I felt this during a session that

[36:54]

my stomach doesn't know really what my lungs do. My stomach doesn't know how my lungs do what they do. But it knows it can fully rely on them to do that, to sustain it, and vice versa. And so I felt that very much that I knew that I was going to get served at 12. I had nothing to do with it. It was just going to appear at my seat three days in a row, twice a day. It would appear in front of me, and all I had to do was just allow the seconds to pass. You know, and same thing with everything else. I got to sit a lot of saws in, because Mike was cooking. And maybe I was sitting saws in for Mike. And so it felt like we were all doing these jobs. Yeah, I had a very strong feeling of interest with that. And I think maybe

[37:58]

Sanghas are the same, that we're joining these Sanghas at Tassajar. We're all just organs in the sort of Zen body. We're all just organs in the Dharmakaya. Yeah, we talked about that some during Sashi, that Sangha is a model of how we work together. And, you know, our Sangha lost their Zendo, and now our Sangha is continuing. It's really wonderful. And we're continuing in this Zendo, and we're really fully functioning in this Zendo. It's lovely. And yet, part of the practice is helping many beings awaken to how they can be part of Sangha, whether it's this particular Sangha, or some Sangha, or how we are all interrelated, as Lloyd mentioned. So, yeah, how are we connected with all beings?

[39:04]

Well, unless somebody else has something you would like to say, you're welcome to do. I had a question. You mentioned Tassajar. I'm wondering specifically, is it a Sashi, or what exactly is happening in those days? So what we're going to do, so Tassajar, as you know, is our Zen monastery. It's in the mountains, kind of west of Carmel, California. And we were offered the opportunity to visit there as a Sangha and practice for six days with the Tassajar community. So this isn't like a full-on Zen practice period for three months, nor is it just a vacation. And there will be two other groups, one from San Francisco Zen Center, their Pure Dharma group, and then a group from Berkeley Zen Center. And we're all going to go to Tassajar and sit Zazen in the morning and work with the

[40:26]

community to take care of Tassajar and make our food. And then sit a little more Zazen and hang out together and enjoy the beauty of Tassajar together at the Sangha practice. So it's just six nights at Tassajar. It's kind of semi-formal, let's say. Does that answer what you need to know? Yes, thank you. Appreciate it. Maybe in the future, the dates don't work, but definitely interested in the future. Yeah, it'd be great. There will be more opportunities, hopefully, unless there's not. Well, thank you, everybody. Thank you all for greeting our Sashin and practice period. Whether you were here physically or not, things should describe. So let's close with the four bodhisattvas and then we'll have

[41:28]

any other announcements.

[41:29]

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