Good morning. Thank you for being here on this beautiful late spring day. It's a nice quiet morning here. We're going to have a busy afternoon of work around the grounds, so I appreciate it that you're here. I also really appreciate We're about a month into the practice period at this point, but who's counting? Some of us are counting, I think. And it's hard. It calls for a lot of effort, and I've been seeing people here almost every day practicing quite hard. So the wooden men and the stone women are all dancing and singing together and actually it's kind of a marathon and some of them are getting tired.

[01:12]

There's a lot of effort, so I hope that as these weeks go by, we'll get to Sashin fairly soon, people can take care of themselves and take care of each other. Keep making an effort. But this way we try to find of taking care of each other is sort of the central element in the practice and it's really central to the stories that I'll tell here today and the stories that Sojin has been studying with us in transmitting the light. So I hope we can find a way to do that. Well, as you can see, Bodhidharma is back up here on the wall. And last time I was talking about Dharma kitsch, and I just grabbed a piece of it off of my shelf. This is a daruma, Bodhidharma, sort of a popular children's toy, but not just for children.

[02:27]

And it has no legs, and it has the This one doesn't work quite as well, but it has the wonderful ability of, no matter how you knock it over, of returning upright. So you knock it off its place, and then it returns to its upright sitting position, which should be a wonderful model for us. Fortunately, we're not made of paper mache, and we have some legs, but I thought I would just show you an example of this. So I want to go back and talk more about case one from the Blue Cliff Record, and I'll read you just the case again. Emperor Wu of Liang asked the great master Bodhidharma, what is the highest meaning of the holy truths? Bodhidharma said, empty, without holiness. The emperor said, who is facing me?

[03:30]

Bodhidharma replied, I don't know. The emperor didn't understand. So after this, Bodhidharma crossed the Yangtze River and came to the kingdom of Wei, which was in the north. Later, Emperor Wu brought this up with Master Qi and asked him about it. Master Qi is kind of his spiritual advisor. Master Qi asked, does your majesty know who this man is? The emperor said, I don't know. Master Qi said, he is the Mahasattva Avalokitesvara, transmitting the Buddha mind seal. The emperor felt regretful. So, he wanted to send an emissary to go invite Bodhidharma to return. Master Chi said, Your Majesty, don't say you will send someone to fetch him back. Even if everyone in the whole country were to go after him, he still wouldn't return. So that's the case.

[04:34]

We will go on. get back to it a little later in this talk, but I wanted to sort of continue telling you the story of Bodhidharma, because it bears very directly on this case. So, when we last saw our hero, 140-year-old at that point, a wild and woolly Brahmin monk, he was sitting in a cave at Shaolin Temple in the northern kingdom of Hui, and he was staring at a wall. And he did that for nine years. Now, nine years of staring at a wall actually doesn't make for much of a story. you know, just watching him sitting there, it doesn't look like there's an awful lot happening, at least externally. So in the meantime, he was summoned twice to the palace of the Emperor of Wei, and this time he decided

[05:45]

It would be better for him not to go, so he just stayed there sitting. He didn't speak at all for nine years, and the legend has it that he sat with such unwavering intensity that his legs withered away. As I think about Sashin coming up, there are many times when I wish my legs would have withered away. I haven't tried sitting for nine years, perhaps. But meanwhile, there were some miraculous things that happened during this time of sitting as well. The first tea plants grew up from Bodhidharma's eyelids that he had removed from his eyes allow him to be more waitful and less sleepy. He threw them down on the ground and the tea plants grew up. Somehow, sitting in complete silence, he also managed to invent Kung Fu as a mental and physical discipline for the Shaolin monks.

[06:57]

But actually, the most marvelous thing was just the fact of him sitting there, experiencing, although it didn't look from the outside like much was happening, experiencing just moment-to-moment concentration, moment-to-moment samadhi, and not waiting for anything to happen or for anyone to come. He certainly wasn't thinking much further about Emperor Wu, although Emperor Wu was still kind of on our minds. So after nine years, during which time he became fairly famous for just sitting there, a young monk whose name in Chinese then was Shengguang, and he was later known as Huiko, or in our lineage as we chant Eka, Taiso Eka in Japanese when we chant the lineage. So this young monk came to his cave seeking the Dharma, and their exchange is one of the best-known Zen stories.

[08:08]

It was winter. Day and night, Shen Kuang stood before Bodhidharma's cave, beseeching him for instruction. The old barbarian, however, sat in Zazen and paid no attention. One night there was a snowstorm, but Shen Kuang stood there unmoving, and the snow reached his knees. Finally, Bodhidharma said, You've been standing there a long time in the snow. What is it you want? I beseech you, Master, open the gate of the Dharma and save all of us beings. Bodhidharma said, The incomparable truths of the Buddhas can only be obtained by constant striving, practicing what cannot be practiced, bearing the unbearable. How can you, with your small virtue and wisdom, and your easy-going and conceited mind, dare to aspire to the true teaching?" With this, it is said, Hsuan-kuang drew a knife, cut off his left arm, and presented it to Bodhidharma.

[09:18]

who relented at last and accepted him as a disciple, giving him the name by which he is known today, Wiko or Eka, which means Light Wisdom. But that was just the beginning of his studies. That was not his enlightenment yet. That was just where he started. So they studied together for several more years and during that time failed to completely arrive at a mutual understanding. And there's another sort of very famous dialogue between Bodhidharma and Eka, which is the core of case 41 of the Gate and Escape, the Mumonkan. And Eka said, Your disciple's mind has no peace yet. I beg you, Master, please put it to rest. Bodhidharma said, Bring me your mind and I will put it to rest.

[10:20]

The second ancestor, Eka, said, I have searched for my mind, but I cannot find it. Bodhidharma said, there, I have completely put it to rest for you. And at that moment, Eka was greatly awakened. So then his training was complete. Now, Bodhidharma actually had four disciples by the time he was ready to die. And he called them together. and said, the time has come for me to depart and I want to see what your attainments are. And the first disciple said, according to my view, the truth is above affirmation and negation. It moves freely. Bodhidharma said, you've got my skin. The nun, Tsongchi, said, as I understand it, It is like Ananda's viewing of the Buddha realm of Akshobhya, which is, this is one of the sort of mythical paradises, the eastern paradise, one of the pure lands that people aspire to be reborn in.

[11:41]

So she said, as I understand it, it is like Ananda's view of the Buddha realm of Akshobhya. It is seen once and never again. Bodhidharma said, you've got my flesh. Another disciple, Taoyu, explained, the four elements are empty and the five skandhas are non-existent. According to my view, there is not a thing to be grasped as real. Bodhidharma said, you have got my bones. Finally, Eka, bowing deeply to his master, just stood by his seat and said nothing. And Bodhidharma proclaimed, you have got my marrow. Now, Basically I'm just sort of telling these stories. I don't want to go too far into them because we could take forever talking about them and we can do that over the long run together.

[12:45]

But I wanted to say something about this matter of skin, flesh, bones and marrow. There are a couple of views about it. But both of the views agree that this is the language of transmitting the Dharma or the Buddha mind seal that Master Chi was talking about in the case, which is a theme for the studies that we've been doing during the practice period. We've been reading stories about the ancestors transmitting the Dharma. I was reading a commentary about the skin, flesh, bones and marrow, and D.T. Suzuki refers to an earlier commentary by the ancestor Nagarjuna, saying very clearly, moral conduct is the skin, meditation is the flesh, higher understanding or prajna, wisdom, is the bone, and the mind, subtle and good, is the marrow.

[13:53]

Now, this mind, subtle and good, is what Mel was talking about, I guess it was two weeks ago, when we, in class, discussed the story, the enlightenment story of Tozan, one of the ancestors. And it is not something that's confined to these ancestors. In fact, it's the common essence that's shared by all teachers and students, although we don't easily see it in ourselves. It's what we're looking for. It's what we're looking at when we sit in Zazen and and clear our minds and non-thinking. Just this mind, subtle and good. But Dogen Zenji's view, Dogen is one of our first Japanese ancestors, his view of skin, flesh, bones and marrow in a piece of his that's called Twining Vines is a little different.

[15:05]

Actually, I like it. I like it better. Twining vines, like many things in Zen, and almost everything that Dogen wrote, twining vines has a double meaning, or a multiple meaning. On the one hand, you can read it as complications, or problems, or hindrances, but more to the point, it describes the relationship, the entanglement of student and teacher in sharing the same dharma, the same mind, and in our case, as we were also talking about last time, the same large extended family. So at this point of practice, when there are twining vines, a teacher and a student's understanding can't be picked apart. You can sort of think of it

[16:07]

Visually, these twining vines picture a mess of blackberry vines all tangled up together, and it's very hard to pick them apart. So Dogen says about these four disciples of Bodhidharma that all four students had attainment and understanding. Each one's attainment and understanding is skin, flesh, bones, and marrow. Had he hundreds or thousands of students after the second ancestor, after the ancestor Eka, he would have spoken hundreds or thousands of words. There should be no limit. In other words, there should be no limit to the number of to the number of people that a teacher can transmit his understanding to or her understanding to, that that's limitless and that skin, flesh, bones and marrow are just sort of symbolic language covering the question of understanding.

[17:20]

So there should be no limit. Attaining the true Dharma eye, or what is called the Buddha mind seal, Dogen says, do not judge by the superiority or inferiority of attaining the flesh or attaining the marrow. So he's urging us not to set up a scale of relative attainment. Just to acquire Bodhidharma's skin is complete enlightenment. And the thing is, if we judge these attainments relatively, if we fall into thinking, this is better than this, or this person's practice is better than my practice, as soon as you fall into thinking about that, we're lost. We're lost in judging ourselves, we're lost away from our practice, we're lost away from the opportunity to just enjoy. the present moment of sitting there, of acknowledging and responding to whatever is coming our way.

[18:30]

If we try to rank our spiritual attainments as, again, one of the cases that Sojin was talking about in class, one of the ancestors had a response about not falling into stages. But if we try to set up a rank saying, well this person understands better than this person and this person understands better than this person and they all understand better than me, at that moment our practice has stopped. Now fortunately you can start it again in the next moment. You can let go of a thought like that. You can let go of any of these thoughts and begin again. That's actually one of the wonderful things about our practice. When we teach Zazen instruction, we suggest that people follow their breath, they count their breath. Some of us don't get past two.

[19:34]

You count from 1 to 10 and start over. It's amazing how much can happen between 1 and 2. A whole world of thoughts can come up really quick. You can see how someone could say that their whole life could flash before their eyes as they're dying. It doesn't take that much time. what we suggest in Zazen instruction is just start over. Don't worry about, and particularly don't judge yourself about how far you got. Don't pat yourself on the back if you got to eight this time and only three the time before, and there's no medal that you get for getting to ten. Actually, the essence of the practice is in starting over. and in the suspension of any kind of judging or ranking.

[20:42]

And we have to watch out. I mean, when we get to ten, we think that we have some accomplishment. And this also reminds me of one of the cases. I know some of you weren't in the class, so this is maybe a little obscure, but we were talking about a case last week of Master Tozan transmitting dharma to the ancestor, Unggadoyo. And after Unggadoyo had a certain level of attainment, Then there's a story about him sitting in his cave and not showing up at the temple for about 10 days. And Tozan is wondering, well, where did he go? Where is he? We kind of miss him at mealtime. And so he called him in, and he says, well, the spirits have been bringing me my meals. And this is a very nice kind of takeout service.

[21:48]

But what it represented in this story was him feeling that he had some kind of attainment, that he had a spiritual development to where he could allow himself to believe in these spirits and to be served that way, rather than serving himself and practicing just the way all the other monks did. Tosan finds a way to make him be aware that his understanding is not complete and sends him back, just as we're sent back to do our breast counting over and over again, he sends him back just to do Zazen, not to rest on any accomplishments. And it's very encouraging to me that the practice that these sort of mythical figures are practicing is not really any different from the practice that we're practicing here. There aren't, as far as I know, there are no steps of, there's no graduation.

[23:01]

You don't accomplish one practice and then, in our style, and then go on to some more advanced practice. I asked Mel Last year, it finally occurred to me to ask him, well, what do you do during zazen? And he said, I give myself zazen instruction. And that was interesting. I wondered what he did. Sometimes he nods. But in those moments between nods, he's sitting up, He's sitting up and giving himself dāsan instruction and starting over in just the same way that you or I might. So that is what Master Tosan was doing with Umbedoyo. So anyway, having fully transmitted his dharma at this point, sitting in Zazen, Bodhidharma passed away.

[24:08]

And I think I told this story a couple of weeks ago. Three years after his death, a Chinese official, Sung Yun, was returning from India through mountain roads of what's now would be Turkestan. the high mountainous area. And there Sung Yun met Bodhidharma, who was supposedly dead for three years, traveling westward toward India with only his robes and a staff over his shoulder and one sandal swinging from the staff. And he thought it was quite remarkable and told people about it when he got back to China. And they immediately went to look at his tomb. and they found in the tomb just one sandal, the other one in the pair. And at this tomb, Emperor Wu, who still hadn't forgotten about Bodhidharma, left this poignant inscription, which I also think I read last time.

[25:15]

So Emperor Wu said, Alas, I saw him without seeing him. I met him without meeting him. I encountered him without encountering Him. And now, as before, I regret this deeply." So this, at last, brings me back to Case 1 of the Blue Cliff Record, which is also found, part of the story is also found in Case 2 of one of the other Koan collections, the Book of Serenity. But that one, the Book of Serenity, only includes the first part, the exchange between Bodhidharma and Emperor Wu. And so I kept thinking, I was thinking, well, why do we have this second part? And my attention was drawn to it. So I'd like to read that to you again, because I'll talk about it here.

[26:17]

So after Bodhidharma had gone, the emperor discussed their exchange with his advisor, Master Chi, who asked him, does your majesty know who this man is? The emperor said, I don't know, which is very different from the I don't know that Bodhidharma had said. So Master Chi said, he is the Bodhisattva Avalokitesvara transmitting the Buddha mind seal. The emperor felt regretful, so he decided to send an emissary to ask Bodhidharma to return. Master Chi said, Your Majesty, don't say that you will send someone to fetch him back. Even if everyone in the whole country were to go after him, he still wouldn't return. So when I talked about this last, I actually, I was expressing some gratitude to Emperor Wu for, well, for being sincere, for kind of daring to expose his lack of understanding.

[27:24]

But I don't want to go too far in that direction because the fact is that Emperor Wu didn't get it. He really didn't get what the exchange was between Bodhidharma and himself. They were both nominally Buddhists, but they really had no vital relationship between them, or they couldn't discover it. And Bodhidharma saw that it would be fairly useless, and perhaps even dangerous, to keep trying to get his understanding across to the emperor. So by night, after that exchange, he stole across the Yangtze River to the north. So Emperor Wu's advisor, Master Qi, finally has to tell the emperor about the great opportunity that he missed, having a chance to actually engage with the compassionate Bodhisattva Avalokitesvara, or Quan Yin.

[28:33]

So then Emperor Wu's reaction, what does he decide to do? He said, well, I'm going to go send an emissary to bring him back. which it took me a while to... somehow it came to me while I was thinking about it. Well, what would say that Kuan Yin came in the gate now and was visiting the Berkeley Zen Center and we didn't get it or some of us didn't get it anyway and I realized that only after only after she had gone, that that was Quan Yin. What would you do in a case like that? I think it's very unlikely that you would send your emissary to bring Quan Yin back. You'd either go or you wouldn't.

[29:36]

And why would you think about sending somebody in your place to do it? I mean, we take these things for granted with kings and queens and high officials, but why are they any different than you? And if you really wanted to understand something, you would go and do it. And this to me, this to me is the great failing of Emperor Wu. If you want to fulfill, if he had this vow to save all beings and to grasp the truth, he had to do it himself without any halfway measure or intermediates. And actually that's what, again, that's what our practice is about. Each of us making this complete effort. We help each other, we support each other, but I'm not going to send Damaris or Karen to find Avalokiteshvara or even myth.

[30:52]

You have to do it by yourself. There's no one who can go and sort of, you can't go to a store or go to another temple and pick up the Buddha mind seal and bring it back here. It just doesn't work. It's not for sale. So, this is one of the problems with being an emperor. But it's not just a problem with being an emperor, it's a problem with being whatever we think we are, or whatever idea of ourselves, whatever idea we invest ourselves in, in our lives. We live, we often live amid the trappings of our, what we think to be our position, whether it's high or low. Sometimes it's very low, but we believe in that too. Last Monday, the Queen of Thailand paid a visit down the block to the Thai temples.

[31:59]

She's a present-day Buddhist monarch, of which there are maybe not so many. Maybe there's only two, her and her husband, I guess. I was invited by our friends down there to greet her, which consisted of standing in a line with about 100 other people and bowing as she went by. Man, never saw a queen before. It was worth going, I guess. She came in a bulletproof limousine, surrounded by Thai security people and American Secret Service agents, traveling in this kind of whirl of hubbub. you know, sort of ceremoniousness. She actually seemed very confident and graceful, but it didn't look like an awful lot of fun.

[33:03]

For some reason, I'm sort of going more far afield. I was thinking of the Mel Brooks movie, I think it's History of the World Part 1, where he plays Louis XVI and says, it's good to be the king. But actually, it didn't really work out so well for Louis or for France, I suppose. And I'm not so sure how good it is to be the king. But our habitual mind convinces us that we have this position to maintain. We have a self to feel important about, or unimportant about. And we kind of urgently want something to count on, or something that seems permanent, even if that something is just our personal suffering. And if it were easier to let go of, to recognize the impermanence than it is, then there would be fewer churches, fewer Buddhists, fewer therapists.

[34:12]

But usually like myself or like Bodhidharma or Thay So Eka, and most of us, we have to learn these things the hard way. And in the meantime, we find a lot of very convincing reasons to limit our efforts for the benefit of all beings. Again, to go back to the emperor, he had a hard time letting go of his position. I mean, he couldn't do it, to actually set it down, even for a while, to go follow Bodhidharma, if he thought that that was really what he wanted to do, to find the truth. And he considered himself a devout Buddhist. I mean, he built temples, ordained monks, published sutras, but the way he practiced was

[35:14]

by picking and choosing what he liked to do, what was easily within his reach of ability. Now, his reach was very broad because he was the emperor, but it wasn't very deep. And this is halfway Buddhism. It's not really Buddhism, and that's why Bodhidharma had no choice, but to answer Emperor Wu, we were talking last time, when he said, well, I've built temples, ordained monks, and so on, so on, so on, so what merit is there in that? And Bodhidharma said, no merit. It has no essential worth. So with no gaining idea at all, We still have to make this sincere effort to experience the real truth of our lives and connection to all other people.

[36:17]

Again, Bodhidharma said to Taiso Eka as he stood in that blizzard up to his knees in snow, the incomparable truths of the Buddhas can only be obtained by constant striving, practicing what cannot be practiced, bearing the unbearable. How can you, with your small virtue and wisdom and your easygoing and conceited mind, dare to aspire to the true teaching? And Eka responded with a very difficult and compelling demonstration of his hunger for the truth, offering his left arm. It's hard to imagine Emperor Wu doing that. And honestly, it's hard to imagine myself cutting off my arm. But if I wanted the truth, strongly enough and I felt it was there for the asking in that way, perhaps one of us might do that.

[37:25]

Now these stories are in the realm of myths and archetypes. You know, we'll probably, very few of us will stand outside a cave in a snowstorm, and very few of the Zen masters that we come across will be living in one. And fewer of us will cut off our arms in a moment of inspiration. But these are actions, I was thinking about, One of our teachers, who passed away recently, Katagiri Roshi, talked about emergency case. I like that idea very much. So in an emergency, how one is just totally alive and totally engaged with everything, with everything in the universe, even right at the moment, right at the brink of

[38:32]

great harm or injury, great passion, and all of us have had moments like this in our lives, this emergency case. So in that moment we don't think, we don't stop to think, we depend on our inner nature, the training that we have, and we meet that moment or that occasion with this kind of surprising total confidence and instinct. And I think it's good to keep this idea of emergency case in mind when you sit down for Zazen. And it may not feel like such an emergency, But really, there is this emergency question of what are you doing just at this moment?

[39:37]

What are you doing with your life? And it's a question that stays with us through all of our zazen. And gradually, over time, we train ourselves so that we can respond to things very quickly. And we know what's arising in ourselves, we can see ourselves very clearly. And we come to a place in our lives where all of us can share these twining vines of Bodhidharma, of Taiso Eka, of Ketagiri Roshi, of Suzuki Roshi, of Sochin, and all of our teachers. Each of these teachers and ourselves was born with this kind of unlimited Buddha nature.

[40:39]

It's there in us, whether we recognize it or not. But we're also born with, well we might be born with the ability and from watching Sylvie she's born with the ability to act directly but we also watch her as she grows up learn all she learns painfully. We watch her learning all the ways to assert herself or to get what she wants or what she thinks she wants and see the suffering that arises for her as she grows up in that. And there's nothing that we can do about that except to meet it with compassion. We're able, with our Zazen, we're able to nurture the understanding, the important understanding that we have, and develop it. And to develop some real faith in our ability to change.

[41:45]

And actually, in the ability of everyone to change. I'm not sure which is harder. Sometimes it's harder to think, I'm capable of changing because I'm just this way, I just like to do things this way. And then other moments I look at somebody else and think, boy, I wish they could change. Then I'd feel better. But actually we have to have a kind of equal face in their ability to change. in everyone's ability to change. And with this belief, we kind of build the extended family that we have here, that we developed through the practice period, that we've developed through our day-to-day practice, which is what it's based on. And we learn slowly and painstakingly how to take care of each other. And I feel that over time, what we'll find is that our own sort of twining vines will be just like a blackberry patch.

[42:56]

It'll be tough and enduring and probably full of thorns, so you have to be careful, but also full of, you know, in the proper season, full of bright blossoms and sweet fruit. So thank you for listening and I think it's time for a few questions or comments. Well, that's right.

[43:59]

Yeah, but he didn't get to go. I met him, but I didn't meet him. I saw him, but I didn't see him. Is he actually talking about Bodhidharma or is he talking about something else? Well, you know, with the most generous turn of mind, you could say that yes, he was talking about something else and that he was, in his denial, he was expressing some that he actually did see himself.

[45:02]

And maybe by the time he died, he did. But I can't say. There's both. There's both sides. There's both the recognizing side. And this is some of the stuff of a koan that both sides are being expressed. The failure to get it. in the exchange, just bringing up the whole matter so that actually we can study. I don't know if that answers your question. Well, I think that's right too.

[46:10]

Would Avalokiteshvara ever come here? No. No, but he or she is here all the time. And one doesn't need Bodhidharma to experience that. But one has to practice in a way and make this effort. I think that's right. I think of all the moments of my life that no matter how much I would like to go back to the beach, but I can't. And that all I have is right here, right now.

[47:13]

And how do I live with that? I mean, I feel very much like the emperor who's never going to get it. Never going to get it. So how do I live? Right, but it's like what Andrea was pointing out. The subtext there is that you don't have to send an emissary. If you're sending an emissary, again, you're missing it. You have everything that you need right here. And why live in regret? unless, you know, you have something vested, unless you have some belief in yourself as regretful. It's not necessary. There may be things that you wish you had done differently, but to dwell on them is missing the present opportunity.

[48:17]

We can't have the emissaries. We have to do it ourselves. And when we get off track, there's the next breath to start over. I was just struck by how restful that idea is. Yeah, it can be. If we suspend those judgments, It can be very easy. I mean, Zazen should be refreshing. I mean, you should... Sometimes it's hard, sometimes painful stuff comes up, but you should... You can walk from the Zendo feeling clearer and gradually you can learn how to do that just in your everyday life. And it should be very fresh. Hopefully our lives are fresh. I just want to share something with you.

[49:34]

You were talking about, you know, when we are facing an emergency, we seem to be able to get in touch with our Buddha. And it happened to me one time that a vessel ran into the lake, and he had been learning how to sail the boat 15 years ago and never sailed at all during that time. the sky get darker and darker, and his body is like red. So I keep telling him the whole time to go back. I was nervous, I was anxious. And then sure enough, it started to rain. And at that very moment, the rain became very rough, and he didn't have a good skill in observing noise. And I find myself telling him, I say, don't worry about me, I'm okay. And at that very moment, I think I just accepted the situation. And I had the courage, I was not afraid. And then today, after I listened to you, I think that... Why can't we get in touch with that courage?

[50:40]

Or having that courage of accepting the situation. And as I thought some more, I thought that perhaps, at that very moment, I know I have no control over the situation. And I accept whatever it becomes. And I think that in our daily life, we think that we have some control. And we try to fix, we try to change, we try to do all the things that we think we can do. So I thought about it and thought that maybe the letting go is very important part of accepting and believe that in that process, you know, something, you can face whatever happens. So it's very refreshing to hear. Just want to check. Thank you. Maybe one more, Vicky? Yeah. I wanted to bring up the poor king again. I feel like he's been maligned. And... He was supported last time.

[51:43]

Oh, I'm sorry. It's okay. No, go ahead. It's all right. No, go ahead. I want to hear it. Okay. It seems like sending an emissary is the karmic tragedy of being a king. Yeah. Right. That's exactly, I mean last time, what I was saying was that, and it's kind of implying it this time, was that actually, it's not such, I literally said, it doesn't seem like such an auspicious birth. to be born a king. It puts you in a very difficult position. And I think it is very difficult. I mean, I'm thinking of, you know, if I think this week of Clinton with the question of most favored nation status for China. Now, I have this feeling that Clinton has some moral values and that if he had his preference just on this kind of pure human rights level, he would have

[52:53]

put some strong conditions on this trade status. I don't know if you know what I'm talking about. Do people know? But because of his political interests, people he has to be accountable here, because of jobs that all of us might want, he has to do something that compromises what might be his higher understanding for the sake of perhaps an economic reality. And that's not easy. That's true. point out is the king-like nature of all of us. Right. This week I was talking with somebody and I asked him, well, what is the world? And he said, the world is what's out there. And I said, well, who experiences the world?

[53:59]

And he said, someone in here. So that's a king. Right. Sending emissaries. Yeah, I think that's right. That's the way we can identify with the King. And how deeply we all are conditioned. Yeah, it's painful. And yet, Bodhidharma and Eckhart, you know, they're trying to show us another way of being as well. And, you know, both of them are kind of absolute statements. And we have to find our own way in the middle of that. I think we have to stop.

[54:46]

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