Our help is in the name of the Lord, who made heaven and earth. Lovely Lord, send your Holy Spirit into our lives. Enter through the ear of our heart and make a comfortable place for yourself there. rearranging the furniture of our interior lives according to your divine will, we ask through Christ our Lord. Good morning. So, last evening we spoke about when you enter into the home of a family or a community, you can almost by instinct sense the health of that community or the sickness of that community. And I can say that since my coming here two or three days ago, you know, immediately I sensed a very, very healthy community of Benedictine monks.

[01:17]

It's really a pleasure for me to be here. at a time when your community life is really quite, it's formatively good, peaceful, and one senses a great deal of centeredness in who you are and whom you aim to be. in preparation for reading Psalm 71 with you today, in preparation for reading Psalm 71 with you today, it struck me that Well, of the list of monks that are on my desk, I have a list of 13.

[02:28]

Now this is not counting Brother Ignatius and Brother Dominic Savio, is that correct? Yes. Who are privileged visitors in our community. So anyway, of that 13 monks, I was born in 1951. Now, of the 13 monks, there are 8 who are older than I am. And of the 13 monks, there are 5 who were born after 1955, according to the list on my desk. Well, so, the age of the community The chronological age is 909 years. You are 909 years old.

[03:34]

I didn't figure out how many years of profession there are, but that's significant also. So we have some 300 years of monastic life here, monastic consecration. But how old is our community now, the median age? Brother Michael, you're entering a community and immediately you become 69 years old. Brother Justin, you are 69 now. Brother Ronald, you are 69. We're all 69 if we count the median age, you see. And now you could say, oh, but that's not quite true because I still feel young. Or, oh, but what about those two brothers of ours who are in the nursing home?

[04:39]

Do they count? Well, yes, they count. They're our brothers. there are veterans, and even though we may feel and still work as if we were 40 and pray as if we're 18 or 19, we are of a certain age. The attitude of the society that we live in The attitude towards its elderly citizens is one indicator of what are the real core values of that society. Western European and North American society is preoccupied with youth and with achievement, with obsessively celebrating what is new,

[05:46]

the latest fads, the latest cars, the latest cybernetic programs, the telephones, the gadgets, the exercise and health programs, speed, power, being with it, all with a view to maximize productivity, enhance the body beautiful, and prolong youth. It's not surprising that such a society tends to hide, marginalize, or even discard the elderly. The obsession with youth, the body, and productivity is in part a flight from aging and the fear of death. In some sectors of our society, old people don't know what to do with themselves. They feel they have nothing to do, no part to play in the orchestra of life.

[06:53]

The young society doesn't think much about what old folks might be good for. Virtual cities have grown up to occupy and warehouse our elder people. Trailer parks in Tucson or Yuma Arizona, condos in Florida and in Southern California, and the villages dotting the western coast of Baja California and Mexico. I visited those cities. Generally in January we have a national biblical conference and for years we always had that on the coast and so we went to a place called Baja, what was it? Well, I was in Cihuatanejo one year and we had an afternoon free so I went down to the dock and there all of the restaurants and all of the places that were there, there were all these people my age and older sitting at tables.

[08:01]

There were no young people. And they were talking about, oh, I received a phone call from my very, very busy son, or my very, very important daughter, or my grandchildren, and here are their photos. But they spend three to five months out of contact with their people. And the visits of their children or their grandchildren are becoming few and far between. It's almost like they are ghosts in their own family. Particularly people who live, we call them the snowbirds. Do you know who they are? They live up in the north and they go south and they tend to be people who have worked, lived, raised their families, and now they're out of touch. We're housed in Florida, Southern California, and Arizona, Mexico.

[09:11]

With advanced years the clock starts running out. and the illusions one has tried to sustain begin to collapse, unravel, and sometimes expose the emptiness in a person's life. When I was, a few years ago, I was, well, many years ago, I would visit Benedictine Nursing Center every Thursday, that was part of my work as a monk, and there was an elderly lady In a rocking chair, it's interesting, she was always, and all the people in this nursing home, many of them, they were sitting in the room where they could see the door, the entrance door and the exit door. They couldn't use that door, but they could see who came in and who went out. And often the people went out were sick or dying or dead.

[10:13]

So she sat there in her rocking chair and sang with empty eyes. Hi, honey. How are you? It's a nice day. Hi, honey. How are you? It's a nice day. Hi, honey. How are you? It's a nice day. Her little speech mimicked the emptiness of so many conversations we have had with elderly people. And it reveals the insincerity and insecurity of so many lives. When I was in my formation years, I'm talking about 1972, 73, I was a chauffeur to some of the patriarchs in the monastery. Mount Angel Abbey. Once in the dentist's office, waiting with Father Ignatius for his appointment, the charming hygienist approached and announced, Father Ignatius, step right this way, please.

[11:28]

He struggled to his feet and waddled into the office. As I paged through the magazine, I sensed that since Father's exit, an elderly lady swathed in light green tent dress, and seated across from me was shifting her weight and fidgeting. I hoped she wouldn't need to enter into conversation. Hope was in vain. Excuse me, Sonny, is that fat, old, dumpy, bald-headed man with the wart on his neck really Father Ignatius from the Abbey? Yes, it seems so. He was Rudy to me. She cooed on. I knew him after the war when he'd just gotten out of the Marines or the Navy. Anyway, he was a beautiful man.

[12:30]

He had a big tattoo on his arm and I just loved him to bits. Imagine, Rudy Groger. What a man. I struggled to imagine my elder, stodgy confrere in another incarnation. The tattoo had been surgically removed in the late forties. The arm had become infected and it was now ravaged with scars. I forced myself to imagine Rudy, or Father Ignatius, without a waddle, without an overhanging belly, and with a full head of hair. saved by the hygienist. The pyramid-shaped lady, tiny on the top, mushrooming on the bottom, neatly dressed in a pup tent, wavy hair with a blue rinse, was summoned into the inner sanctum of the dentist's office. I caught her name, Julia.

[13:33]

In short order, Father Ignatius exited In the car on the way back home, he confided to me, you'll never guess whom I just met. When I was a novice, there was a pretty young postulant working in the abbey kitchen. We monks always rivaled to get scullery duty, just to get a glimpse of her. Was she ever a dish? And sweet as can be, Mother Prioress finally had her reassigned because she was just too luscious for us youngsters. Her name was and is Sister Julia, and now she looks like a comfortable oversized avocado. Instead of a veil, she has blue hair. I just met her in the dentist's office after more than 40 years. I wouldn't have recognized her, but she sure knew me.

[14:36]

Guess I haven't changed all that much in 40 years. Father Ignatius took me back to the 1940s as he crooned old love songs all the way home back to the Abbey. I was a monastery barber for many years, about 20 years, and every six weeks or so, Father Ignatius, who was bald on top, would come in, plop himself down in the chair, and announce, I don't care what you do to me, just make me beautiful. The song, the song, the song that we're going to pray together. The psalm is Psalm 71.

[15:42]

Let's read together the first nine verses. Now what I'm suggesting is that this psalm was written also by a Levite. now I can't prove that but it's one of the it's one of the very very strong pieces that I'm that I'm working at right now with some other with other people who study Bible with me we're going to read nine verses this psalm was written by an elder who is looking backwards and looking forwards and contemplating his relationship with an elder God. One to nine, what catches your attention together? In you, Lord, I take refuge. Never let me put to shame. In your justice, rescue me, deliver me, listen to me, save me.

[16:46]

Be my rock and refuge, my secure stronghold, for you are my rock and fortress. My God, excuse me, from the power of the wicked. On you, I depend since birth. From my mother's womb, you are my strength, my hope. In you, never peace. I have become a portent to men, but you are my strong refuge. My mouth shall be filled with your praise, shall sing your glory every day. Not bad. So, what catches your attention in these verses?

[17:49]

Some image or some word or some phrase? What catches your attention in this? Yes, fine. Okay, we've got that rescue, and it's probably two or three times we've got rescue, and then we've got in verse three, you be my rock, my refuge, my secure stronghold. You are my rock and my fortress. Images that are very, very strong for a man who perhaps is experiencing certain weakness or his being fragile. So that catches our attention. What else? flashbacks, memories.

[18:59]

You've always been there. Ever since my youth, you've been there. And so the elder poet is saying, you better stay with me. Look at the imperatives in the first verses. Let me never be put to shame. Rescue, deliver, listen, save, be my rock. Rescue me from the power. There's a lot of, it's almost like he feels like he's in emergency, he's in the emergency ward. He really needs some security right now. You've always been there for me. Don't forsake me. Don't abandon me now. You've always been there for my youth. Don't abandon me now." So we have that also, that tension in a person. Anything else?

[20:01]

The infirmed, I'm suggesting that the poet is elderly, perhaps infirmed. Something happened in his life where he's experiencing, well, something's got to be done now. This infirmed elder poet is reflecting on how time has impacted his life. His aging eyes shift from present to the past, and then to the future. His mother taught him to trust God always and he hasn't forgotten that. Says, on you I depend since my birth. From my mother's womb you are my strength, my hope in you never fails. He says in verse 17, God you have taught me from my youth, to this day I proclaim your wondrous deeds. But has God forgotten him now?

[21:05]

His detractors would say, yes. The poet knows better, but he's still anxious. If even a brief life has crises, his life has been long. And at times, God has seemed far away. The poet is anxious. With the passing years, a person learns how the buoyancy of youth contributes to optimism and helps to weather life's storms. As we grow older, some of our usual support systems are removed. What was once resilient, self-confident optimism may have done its work. If that optimism is withdrawn, one may be left with a sort of resignation about the meaning of my present life.

[22:12]

If an elder allows it, God can be closer than ever. One's accomplishments may be the outcome of youthful ambition and high ideals, Lifelong friendship and human love have been purified. Trust has been tested and proven. But that doesn't bring us to the finish line. I remember Father Martin, the prior for many years at Mount Angel. He was in his 80s. I think he was probably 85, 86, or 87. and he was leading the choir that week and he would pray for perseverance. And I thought, he's 87 years old, does he have any options? But he prayed for perseverance in his monastic consecration.

[23:20]

At the beginning of this psalm, The imperative mood impresses us. Let me never be put to shame. Rescue, deliver, listen, save. Sounds like an emergency. Time is running out. The elder poet reviews the stages of life. Twice he remembers God in whom from infancy, in youth, and throughout life he has trusted and whose wonders he has admired." Verses 5 and 6 and 17. God controls the whole of life, including the wondrous stage in the maternal womb when the poet was just an embryo of hope. From my mother's womb, you are my strength, he says. Before the tiny creature is even conscious, God knows him inside and out.

[24:26]

At first, the mother may sense only a growing presence within her body, while God orchestrates the whole pregnancy. Other people see the bulge of the tummy But all loving God is inside, sculpting, molding, knitting the tiny unfolding creature. That image of knitting and weaving is an eloquent part of Psalm 139, which we prayed two nights ago at Vespers, where we prayed You are the one who created my innermost being. You have sheltered me since I was in my mother's womb. Not even my bones have ever been concealed from you. Since the time I was molded in the hidden place, kneaded together in the depths of the world below, your eyes have followed all the stages of my life.

[25:32]

In the book of Job also we have Job. saying how close God has always been with him. God was in his mother's womb knitting the bones, the little bones and the sinews and the flesh together into a human being. In Bible times and up until recent advances in obstetrics, pregnancy and birth were much more hazardous than they are today in our clinics and hospitals. The lives of both mother and baby were often threatened. When the newborn infant survived, the parents could sense God's hand in it. And he says, on you I depend since my birth. The prophet Jeremiah was chosen for his mission even before his conception and birth. He prays, before I formed you in the womb, I knew you.

[26:38]

Before you were born, I consecrated you. Another stage in life is adolescence and youth. Embracing those years of experimentation, learning, experience, perhaps rebellion. In this stage, the body develops dramatically. while the mind and the spirit trail behind. Good teachers and role models are key to development. Looking back, the poet has had an excellent mentor. He says in verse 17, God, you have been my mentor. You have taught me since my very youth. The instruction was not just theory, Hard knocks play their part, the written and the spoken word, the false starts and the dead ends in life, the example of elders and peer pressure, even the betrayal of friends.

[27:50]

Take a moment today and reflect on God's hand in your development. through the various stages of life. Mark out your life as before the age of 12, maybe before the age of 20 or 21, maybe those first 15 years of your adult life, so 35 or 37. What's going on in your 40s? What's going on in every stage of your life? Name the people, name the incidents that formed you. Recall how God has kept in touch, has attended to you personally even when you haven't necessarily wanted to keep in touch with God or consciously kept in touch with God.

[28:57]

Identify how God is lovingly attending you now in the present stage of your life. Are you leaning on God more now or are you just trying to stiff it out? Years have passed. Where have they gone? The poet loves them all together. He inspires us to remember and reflect as he addresses God. Verse 20, you have sent me many bitter afflictions, but once more revive me from the watery depths of the earth. Once more raise me up. God has permitted all that life holds for us.

[30:01]

That's the confession of faith of our poet. Physical dangers and threats, sickness, accidents, surgery, spiritual dryness and pitfalls, unhealthy companions, personal crises, the death of our parents, illness and the death of siblings, habitual sin, temptations, betrayal by a friend, boredom or disinterest or indifference, but God has been present through all this. The poet prays in verse eight, my mouth shall be filled with your praise, shall sing your glory every day. And thus one arrives at a mature age.

[31:05]

This prolonged journey is a combination of God's grace and personal triumph. Every year has been another gift. But now, I'm speaking of the poet, but now at the age of 70 or 80, every year is a bonus. We said in the prayer this morning at Lodz, a mere 70 years is this life of ours, or 80 for those who are strong. How many years do we have left? Oh, but we're attached to life. We want to keep on living. We have much to accomplish yet, much to see and do, yet what comes with age is inconvenient, bothersome, or downright painful and humiliating. Growing old is not for sissies, Grandma used to tell me.

[32:10]

Price, the poet, contemplates advancing years and diminishing energies and asks God not to abandon him when help is most needed. Verse 9, Do not cast me aside in old age, as my strength fails, do not forsake me. In verse 18 he says, now that I am old and gray, do not forsake me. He repeats that. There seems to be almost a fear in the poet, don't abandon me now. You have it before. Don't forsake me. Let's read together verses 10 to 19. Verses 10 to 19. For my enemies speak against me, they watch and plot against me. They say, God has abandoned that one.

[33:16]

Pursue, see the wretch. No one will come to the rescue. God, do not stand far from me. My God, hasten to help me. Bring to a shameful end those who attack me. Cover with contempt and scorn those who seek my ruin. I will always hope in you and add to all your praise. My mouth shall proclaim your just deeds day after day, your acts of deliverance, though I cannot number them all. I will speak the mighty works of the Lord. O God, I will tell of your singular justice. God, you have taught me from my youth. To this day I proclaim your wondrous deeds. Now that I am old and gray, do not forsake me, God, that I may proclaim your might to all generations yet to come.

[34:20]

Your power and justice, God, to the highest heaven. You have done great things, O Lord. Who is your equal?" So we're kind of in the same tone as the first verses, but is there anything that catches your attention in these verses? He's got, at the beginning, he's got this kind of fear that somebody is against him. We have that, we know that also in families when changes have to be made, decisions have to be made, sometimes interventions have to be made for elderly people in the family. And the father, the mother, the aunt, the grandparents might begin to think that their whole family or parts of their family are against them.

[35:24]

So we have that sort of paranoia that comes with some of the changes in life that are necessary perhaps. Time, chronos, is against our poet here. Increasingly more in our society, families isolate their elder members because they don't have space, they don't have time, they don't have money. Sometimes classmates, colleagues, lifelong friends distance themselves because there's no interest, there's no energy. Perhaps what needed to be said and shared has already been said and shared.

[36:30]

In many instances, the elder feels betrayed by shakiness and dwindling strength. one's own body can't be counted on. In the case of shortness of breath, heart failure, aches and pains, urinary incontinence, digestive discomfort, deafness, forgetfulness, and increasingly dull attention span, The memory plays tricks on an elder person. Feelings are slow to respond. Communication breaks down. Telephones, computers, even televisions can be confusing. New gadgets, fashions, and techniques don't grab the interest they once did.

[37:32]

The elder gets tired reading and sometimes he even gets tired of reading something he's always enjoyed. He may find himself less able to follow a conversation. He's slow to get involved in new projects and decisions. Conversation with the young and even with contemporaries may present challenges. may leave him confused, yet wanting to fake it. A danger in monastic communities is that the elder monks become ghosts in the community. Spiritual masters have reflected about the loneliness of the desert, but a more acute loneliness can come not from the desert, but in community life I often wondered about my deaf confrere, Brother Morris, spent the last 16 years of his life without being able to communicate with people.

[38:44]

He always had a speech challenge, but in the last years of his life, it became a hearing issue and he couldn't connect with people. People couldn't understand him. We used a drawing board to help communicate. I often wonder about our inveterate extrovert, Abbot Joseph, who became isolated in his depression and living in a nursing home during the last four years of his life. Or I remember Father Alquin, another patriarch in the community, calling out in the middle of the night, and we all lived in a long hallway, And Father Alquin's door was open, he was 90-some, and he needed our attention. And so he was calling out one night, Help! Help!

[39:45]

Help! Well, I was living on the end of the hallway, and there was probably 16 monks between myself and Father Alquin's room, and I was listening to this, Help! This is one o'clock in the morning. And so I, I got up and I walked down to father Alvin's room and I opened the door and I turned on the light and said, father, father, what's wrong? Can I be of assistance? And he responded. I just wanted to see if anybody was out there, but there's somebody who's always out there. God, do not stand far from me. My God, hasten to help me." Advanced years remind a person of all that God has invested in one throughout life. As the poet psalmist nears his Passover, he reminds God of his birth.

[40:51]

After 70 or 80 years of caregiving, Will loving God desert him now? He asks in verse 18, now that I'm old and gray, do not forsake me, God. Does God get tired of old monks? Does God get tired of old friends? But our elder monks who follow the poet's lead haven't gotten tired of God. The aging poet models fidelity and is not ready to toss in the towel. He asks God not to desert him because he still has something to give, something valuable to teach in the form of wisdom, in the form of praise, perseverance, humor, friendliness, personal testimony. He says in verse 18 and verse 19, that I may proclaim your might to all generations to come, your power and justice, God, to the highest heaven.

[42:04]

You have done great things, God. Who is your equal? For many years, our elders have built our monastery, fashioned our monastic observance and tradition. They have accumulated experience, and now they're passing it on like a torch to relay runners. They've persevered in their life commitments, in their struggles, but they haven't finished yet. and neither is God finished with them. He prays in verse 24, Yet, yes, my tongue shall recount your justice day by day. God's power has no limits, and God never gets old and tired. He prays in verse 19, O God, who is your equal?

[43:09]

In the end, I'm amazed in verse 22, that I may praise you with the lyre for your faithfulness, my God, and sing to you with the harp, O Holy One of Israel. My lips will shout for joy as I sing your praise, my soul too, which you have redeemed. Yes, my tongue shall recount your justice day by day. The elder poet reflects on his life, and he joins in the liturgy, and he takes up playing a musical instrument, the lyre and the harp, and composes a tribute to a lasting friendship with God. The depleted physical and mental capacities do not signal God's abandonment, but rather a life which has been crowned with blessings and cared for by a veteran God who invites us to love and live with Him forever.

[44:32]

a parable. One day, a veteran monk, accompanied by some observers, entered the empty chapel. One young man was talking in a loud voice, and they all heard the echo throughout the large, empty space. Everything, thing, thing, that I say, say, say, you can hear two times, two times, times, times. The elder told them all to listen, and he spoke up, they hurt me, and the echo came back, hurt me, hurt me, me. He continued, they cheated me, betrayed me, used me, made me feel bad. And the echo sounded back. Cheating, cheating, cheating. Betrayed, betrayed, betrayed. Used, used, used.

[45:43]

Made me feel bad, bad, bad. The observers asked, and what does that mean? The veteran took up the podium again and spoke out. I forgive you. I value you. I will help you. thank you." And the sound chamber came back with, forgive you, value you, help you, thank you, thank you, thank you. Again, the young person asked, what does it mean? To which the veteran answered, it's our life. The way you talk to it is the way it will talk back, talk back, talk back. In the way that we talk and pray, in the way that we model our monastic lives, we are not only programming ourselves for ways of thinking,

[46:58]

but we are programming the people around us and we're programming the next generation of monks which follow us. By the way that we talk, the way that we walk, the way that we manage our monastic life is the way we're setting, we're marking our own community with a certain vision, certain way, we're programming ourselves and the people around us to live in certain ways. Let us prefer nothing to the love of Christ. May God bring us all together to everlasting life. The psalm for this evening will be Psalm 39.

[47:59]

Psalm 39.

[48:00]

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