Did I introduce to you the famous koan of the buffalo last time? No? Okay. Very famous koan, I'd like to tell you then. The Hoenn of Mount Goso, who I… was Mumon's I think Mulan's teachers, a dharma brother, said, a buffalo goes through a window, and his horns go through, and his head goes through, and his body goes through, and all four legs go through, but his tiny tail can't get through. Why is that? Sounds like a silly question, but it's very famous koan and very good koan. Rick, you know, most of you know Rick Levine. He's a, now he's a taxi driver. And

[01:31]

He tells me sometimes about his experiences with people in Texas and he can hardly believe it because everyone, not everyone, but many people and almost everyone who promises anything is cheating him. For example, he says that Many, many people say they don't have enough money to pay the fare, or they're broke, or they lost their wallet, or they gave their money to their friend or wife or husband, or they only have a check or something. And they all promise, absolutely faithfully, to mail him the money. And he says, they look so honest. They look me straight in the eye and they're all dressed in suits and ties, and they swear up and down they're going to mail me the money. He says, almost no one ever mails him money. Virtually no one. And he gets extraordinary tales of, I'm about to receive an inheritance and my aunt's this and that.

[02:52]

I have to have some money to answer the telegram or the inheritance will be sent back to New York. Or he gets all kinds of other dilapidated requests for this and that. And then Jim Buchwurst tells me his stories too. And Jim is the buyer for the Green Gulch Green Grocer. And you haven't seen the store since David took it over. But it's really wonderful. Everybody enjoys going there. It's interesting. People enjoy shopping there more than if we gave the food out for free. We had a little dispensary. which just passed out food, you know? Broccoli, if you needed broccoli. No one would enjoy it, but everyone enjoys the store. And it's always pretty crowded now with people and pumpkins and, I don't know, David. Four or five people work there.

[04:19]

And Jim does the buying, and he's a large part of the feeling in the store, because he chooses, brings in such wonderful vegetables and such an interesting selection. You know, the colours are... It's like Christmas time in the store, all with a rather bright, cheery feeling. But to hear Jim talk, he loves the people he sees every day. He goes to the farmer's market and various other places and buys vegetables. And each encounter, he says, is extraordinary, and everyone helps him. They turn out to be quite remarkable people. Anyway, I'm telling you these two stories because I'm convinced they're the same people. Nearly the same people that Rick is meeting and that Jim is meeting. And the real difference is, in one case they're in transition, in the other case you're meeting them in terms of what they do.

[05:42]

And there's no question about it. People have a pretty terrible time with transitions. You may not think so, but if you go somewhere or get involved in an unfamiliar situation, after leaving Tassajara you'll find your state of mind is quite jumpy. And everyone knows this, you know, that's why all the advertisements for the airplanes emphasize some sexual license, you know, with flying the stewardesses to Florida or something. because people can't cope with transitions very well. A great deal of the state of mind of our present day is because we travel so much, I think.

[07:30]

I believe I mentioned to you that Ivan Ilyich pointed out that China, people's China, has two classes, those who stay put and those who travel. If you don't move around, your values and state of mind are quite different. And so of the various ways of practice I've mentioned, you know, the cave, the street saint, the teacher and disciples, and the anonymous person in society, the street saint is probably the most difficult.

[08:35]

This is why wandering about in contexts where nobody knows you is one part of Zen practice. And you'll find that out you must have noticed that already, for yourself on the borderlines of the edges of decisions, or when you don't know quite what to do, or you have some time on a four-and-nine-day. So a place like Tassajara is not the answer, but it's a wonderful chance to get some familiarity with a stable state of mind. Up to a point, the more familiar you are and the more

[10:14]

time you've had with this experience of a more stable state of mind and activity, the more likely you'll be able to reach beyond a stable state of mind. the parable or story of the moon and its reflection is similar to this, which is real. The light from the water or the light in the sky Which is the real moon? Can we say something is real even? You say that's just a reflection and that's the moon? The water, or is the water? What is the water? Is it real?

[11:52]

what is conditioned and unconditioned. Suzuki Roshi said, because everything changes, everything changes because of the unconditioned. Or, because you are unconditioned, there is conditioned. Or, because you are conditioned, there is unconditioned. At least we can say, intellectually, you should move more toward the medium, identifying with the medium, if you have to identify with something. The water on which many things are reflected, the medium by which we know many things.

[13:07]

So I'm still talking about what I introduced at the beginning of this practice period. What do you possess? What is a possession? And what is your state of mind? Do you possess your state of mind? a poem Mumon comments, uses to comment on the story of the buffalo, or just two lines, is, First I go out after the fresh grass. Returning, I follow the

[14:23]

Returning, pursuing the falling blossoms. Going out, following the fresh grass. Returning, pursuing the following blossoms. A stable state of mind, I mean... I think I may have said so before, but again, the closest thing we can say to it, if we have to verbalize it, is maybe it's like two trains. in which both trains are moving the same speed. And so when you look at the other train, it looks like it's stopped. Well, our mind can feel like it's stopped. We feel no separation from what we perceive. And what we perceive is not turning

[15:51]

on changing by the winds of greed, hate and delusion. Desire and fear are not continually turning things into other things by our many thoughts and reflections on the topics in our mind. It is almost impossible to get free of topics. But our great limitation is that we define consciousness by a topic. Our consciousness is limited by a topic, and our activity is limited by choice, by being defined by the realm of choice.

[16:59]

and our consciousness being defined by the realm of topics. What consciousness do you have beyond topics? You'd have to say, it's unconscious. If there's no topic, if there's no observer or there's no awareness of it, it must be unconscious. But it's not unconscious. So what I'm talking about today is what is consciousness and activity beyond the realm of topic and choice? Is there something indestructible?

[18:06]

no matter what happens or when the world collapses, it remains. Is there such a thing? Another poem, Hakuen says about this koan, The moon beyond the window is always the same, and yet one plum branch, and it's different. Another poem on this buffalo koan is the Mount of Goso or Tozan. The Mount of Goso is very hard to reach. People grope their way along through the clouds and fog. Night comes and the half-moon is in the pine trees.

[19:35]

The south village is dark, in the dark, and the north village is shrouded in mist. Again, we are talking about activity or consciousness, not limited by topics. It will be very good if by being in a stable situation, like Tassajara, you can achieve a stable state of mind, like pasting the moon on the sky. And it stays there. Dogen says,

[20:48]

Let go of it and it fills your hands. It is not bounded by either horizontal or vertical. Speak of it and it fills your mouth. I can say this verges on being a tangible experience. Although if you think you understand it or feel you grasp it, it's wrong. To make it complete is to make it incomplete. To make it a topic is to kill it. So you want not just a stable state of mind, unhindered by greed, hate and delusion, but a state of mind which has no topic at all, is not interfered with by transitions, can't be reached by greed, hate and delusion.

[22:28]

speak of it and it fills your mouth. The head goes through and horns go through the window and body and four legs, but the tiny tail can't get through. This is the question. Why is it?

[23:58]

Is there anything you'd like to talk about? Can't be reached by greed, hate and delusion? Can't be reached by my explanation either. I mean, it's not necessary to – I shouldn't say it – not necessary to get rid of greed, hate and delusion. One way is we do so, and I think the effort to do so must be there. But the other is we realize this state of mind – state of mind, again, that's a

[26:04]

I'll say that. Which it doesn't matter, you know, what form things take. Everything is an opportunity. We know then, only gift we have is this state of mind. All other relationships with people take a backseat to this feeling. So greed, hate and delusion are just then opportunities to give someone this state of mind. How do we use greed, hate, and delusion as an opportunity? If it's still fascinating, you can't use it as an opportunity.

[27:24]

You know, as long as you believe in things, and yourself as a thing or topic, you'll be involved in whether things help you or hurt you. So you'll be involved in greed, hate and delusion. He said, what does one enter? It feels like everything's closed. It's closed by your belief in greed, hate and delusion, by your belief in things. It's very difficult to cope with nothing exists. We know it's not true. Well, maybe it's not true. So I was talking the other day about Kei Chu's cart.

[28:45]

I think Philip said that this is not some therapeutic process, that we're involved... I think you said we're involved in some esoteric practice, and the proof of it is that you can't explain to your mother what a sashim is. You said something. I heard it in the automobile going to St. Petersburg. That's right. You can't explain it to me. We are involved in an esoteric practice, a kind of esoteric practice. I'm not. What does Dogen mean when he says, when you speak it, it fills your mouth? In this realm there's no greed, hate and delusion. It's not philosophy. You have to have a gut outside yourself. The best way is having devoted yourself to some other people. Start out with just one person who you decide you'll help them in any way you can.

[31:11]

It's much more in the realm of plum branches than it is in the realm of philosophy. What kind of... Where are you keeping that person who comes out on transitions? How can you keep yourself? How is your

[32:34]

What is the simple craft of your stable state of mind? And as you know, you, I think most of you, want to trust spontaneous or natural and This is a misplaced trust. I always talk about it, but I'd like to say more strongly, I deny there's anything called natural. In Buddhism, there's no such thing as natural. There's only karma. To have the idea of natural as we have it is peculiarly Judaic Christian. It's almost identical with believing in God.

[33:49]

It means you have to believe something is controlling you. If not God, then science will figure out. Our insight will figure out. Our natural will help us. So we don't like to think about giving up the idea of natural because it means we're going to program ourselves every minute, make sure we're programmed through transitions so we don't lose our state of mind. But this is, again, a topic. This is grasping at straws, grasping at topics.

[35:08]

As I've said, you don't have any problem with what to do with your hands, but you have a big problem of what to do with your mind. Somehow our mind is sacred and you mustn't mess with it. And you do uncover a fundamental problem this way. Who is, you know, not just as a question, but in your very tangible experience, who's controlling what? Who is in charge here? Natural? Or you observing and adjusting? If you emphasize just a stable state of mind, You won't know what to do next. How will you decide what to do next? What will decide what to do next? This is a very, very real question.

[36:34]

Can the medium decide or the topic decide? Well, I'm not saying anything. I'm suggesting alternative ways of thinking about your state of mind. So I'm not saying which one is which or what is what, just you can think of. You know, we think in this way, stable state of mind. We identify with various topics. We identify with consciousness as a topic.

[37:59]

So in zazen you become quite bored or sleepy when there's no topic. Take away the topic and you don't know anything else to do but sleep. Without a topic most of us are not conscious. Notice it in your own consciousness. And so an experimental, playful attitude is best. If you don't know what's going on, you can experiment. I will identify with me, and then you will try identifying with your stomach or hand, or you can identify with

[39:45]

Objective world. Everything you do, you just try to be one with it. And when you find, as in some transitional state, various things pressing on you to be identified with, you can try some other identification, I am Buddha. You can try that one on. Your state of mind and your situation is like the material of a craftsman. And you can do this if you can always have the security of returning to things just as they are. Eventually, you may get tired of this exploration.

[41:29]

It's necessary to do it, but eventually you may get tired of it and suddenly see through the whole show. Then you don't have to worry about it anymore. If there's nothing you can tack the observer onto, or no natural you can trust, you have to be able to trust each thing. You have no other choice. And this means some wide, undeflected state of mind.

[42:52]

And you can begin this experiment. Right now, I would suggest that you, in zazen, be completely subjective. Settle yourself on yourself. And in your activity, be completely objective. one with whatever you're doing. And your energy in this, your effort, why should you make an effort? If you look carefully, you'll find you're usually making a tremendous effort to not make an effort. Because you want to protect that person who comes out in transitions, you're very afraid of letting go of that person, that topic.

[44:25]

this is simply the condition of all of us and yet we see the unconditioned we feel the unconditioned and we long to be one with it and we see it in others' eyes.

[45:12]

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